The Wonton Don | Donnie Does
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SportsTranscript
00:00 There are many games, there's many sports in the world, but...
00:03 Relax, relax.
00:04 That's cheating! That's cheating!
00:07 American football isn't a game.
00:09 Hoo! Hoo! Hoo!
00:11 We're generals and winning's our preferred type!
00:13 Hoo! Hoo! Hoo!
00:14 We are!
00:16 If you don't want to play, give your jersey to someone that does!
00:19 I'm sure you're probably wondering,
00:21 why is Billy playing in a Ugandan football game
00:23 while I coach from the sidelines?
00:25 Well, it all started when I came across a tweet
00:28 promoting a football game between Uganda and Kenya.
00:31 Both teams played their hearts out,
00:32 but it was Kenya that claimed the bragging rights
00:35 thanks to a George Anwang touchdown.
00:37 I wasn't even aware that people played football in Africa
00:40 and was intrigued.
00:41 So I reached out on Instagram to the Football Federation of Uganda
00:45 to see if I could cover the game as a journo.
00:47 You rarely get such people who really want to come in,
00:50 support you and come and document what you're doing
00:53 and show it to the whole world.
00:54 And seeing I work with a lot of elite football talent,
00:57 I also offered to bring one of my co-workers to help coach.
01:01 That's right, Billy Football.
01:03 High school legend with a genius level football IQ.
01:07 I mean, slinging it is slinging it.
01:09 That's why I think Zach Wilson has the ceiling of Patrick Mahomes.
01:13 The Federation was thrilled to have him on board.
01:16 The only issue now was that Uganda didn't have nearly enough pads and helmets.
01:20 Luckily, our sponsor, Pardon My Cheese Steak,
01:23 offered to cover any costs needed
01:24 to have the team properly equipped by game day.
01:27 So the Federation put them in touch with Hisprint Ministries,
01:30 a non-profit organization with a history of supporting international sports programs.
01:35 Hisprint has been blessed to share equipment
01:39 around the world for the past 17 years.
01:42 David had more than enough pads to donate,
01:44 but with the game less than a month away,
01:46 there wasn't enough time to ship it.
01:48 But because Donnie and his crew were going,
01:51 we were able to give 150 pounds of equipment
01:54 for them to carry with them.
01:56 And just like that, the boys were off.
01:59 We're going to win. We're going to get them right.
02:01 We're going to beat Kenya.
02:02 How's the foot feeling?
02:11 Fine. It's feeling good. I'm mobile.
02:13 Pardon my cheese steak boot.
02:15 I probably should note that a couple days before our trip,
02:18 Billy apparently fractured his ankle in a men's league basketball game.
02:21 This trip was already going to be stressful.
02:25 And coaching with a disabled guy definitely wasn't going to simplify things.
02:29 Crippled man-child coming through.
02:31 But on the bright side, we both got to breeze through security in the wheelchair lane.
02:35 My leg's pretty broken.
02:37 It's very broken.
02:38 To get to Uganda, we took the scenic route,
02:40 which involved a 13-hour layover in Cairo,
02:43 where we got emotional at the pyramids.
02:45 Are you crying, Billy?
02:48 Rode camels, sampled the local cuisine.
02:50 This is a pizza hut? Are you shitting me?
02:52 And drank a zillion beers.
02:54 They're going down like water.
02:55 And they just go...
02:56 You can check out my Cairo layover vlog for a full recap of that side quest.
03:00 From Egypt, we flew directly to Uganda's capital, Kampala,
03:04 where President of the Ugandan Football Federation, Stephen Okeng,
03:07 met us at the airport to collect the football equipment.
03:10 Billy, how are you?
03:11 Nice to see you.
03:13 How do I get Ugandan citizenship so I can play for the team?
03:17 I can play if you guys...
03:18 Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
03:19 Our first practice wasn't for another day.
03:21 So in the meantime, decided to go for a jungle trek
03:24 to get up close and personal with Uganda's most prized national treasure,
03:29 gorillas.
03:30 We just got eyes on a silverback.
03:32 He's going to be our starting defensive tackle.
03:34 Despite the fact I got attacked by wasps,
03:36 I'm being attacked.
03:38 Ah!
03:39 Did you get stung, Donnie?
03:40 Yeah, like 20 times.
03:41 It was truly a magical experience.
03:44 Check out my full gorilla vlog if you want to see more of that.
03:47 With the touristy stuff out of the way,
03:49 we could now focus all of our attention on one goal,
03:52 beating Kenya.
03:54 So we hurried back to the capital to rest up for our first practice.
03:58 Come inside, have a seat.
03:59 Sure.
04:00 I'll be waiting for the team.
04:01 OK.
04:02 Hello, how are you?
04:03 We're happy to have you guys here.
04:04 Oh, nice.
04:06 We're happy to be here.
04:07 What position do you play?
04:09 Well, I'm too old.
04:11 OK, yeah.
04:12 I'll be the equipment manager.
04:14 It's nice to meet you.
04:14 Hey.
04:16 You guys ready to play some football?
04:18 Ready.
04:18 Hell yeah.
04:19 It's nice to meet you, man.
04:20 We're going to beat Kenya.
04:21 Is the Kenyan team very big?
04:23 Well, they are big.
04:25 They're not so big.
04:26 OK.
04:27 But maybe they have more experience than we do.
04:29 I want to throw the ball around.
04:31 I want to see how you guys catch.
04:32 If you can catch, you're going to score a touchdown.
04:36 We're-- dude, we're golden, baby.
04:38 Do you know how to do a play fake?
04:40 Run 10 yards and stop.
04:42 And then you give him the ball.
04:45 Down.
04:46 Play fake.
04:48 Go.
04:49 Give it to him.
04:50 Boom.
04:51 That's a touchdown.
04:53 We can do that 10-0, no shit.
04:56 That's good.
04:57 That's very good.
04:58 No one will see it.
04:59 Playing football is awesome.
05:01 But when you can't play football anymore,
05:03 the best thing I've ever done was teach these guys.
05:06 Oh, I'm excited.
05:10 You are fast.
05:11 I want to line them up and maybe run some of your pass plays
05:15 just to get the reps in, to get the chemistry, as they say.
05:19 We were eager to get practice underway.
05:21 But first, our presence was required at a nationally
05:24 televised press conference.
05:26 The 2023 American Football Africa Zone Series
05:29 will be the second major competitive and full contact
05:32 event to be hosted by the American Football
05:35 Federation of Uganda.
05:36 We are very ready for the game this year.
05:39 And the Kenyan team, they should be ready.
05:41 With me here, with some of our partners for the game
05:45 this year, on my right is Adon from Padua Matchistic.
05:50 And I also have Coach Billy.
05:54 With the help of American coach player William Kota,
05:57 the Ugandan side is promising a much improved event
05:59 in terms of team performance and execution.
06:03 I'd just like to say I'm very impressed and surprised
06:06 on how good of talent I've already
06:08 seen from the Ugandan team.
06:10 American football isn't a game.
06:12 It's really a lifestyle and a union of teamwork,
06:17 intelligence, execution, discipline, and strategy
06:21 that is unlike anything else on this planet.
06:24 We grow up looking up to players like Tom Brady and Blake
06:28 Bortles, not just for what they do on the field,
06:31 but what they have accomplished off the field.
06:33 Because I really think it's a character building sport.
06:36 I know we're in a country called Uganda.
06:39 But football, it's not about you.
06:41 It's not about you.
06:42 It's not about you.
06:43 It's not about you.
06:44 It's not about you.
06:44 It's about we.
06:46 And we, Uganda, beat Kenya.
06:48 [APPLAUSE]
06:52 Our press conference performance had shown
06:53 that we could talk the talk.
06:55 Kenya is in trouble.
06:57 I guarantee it.
06:58 But now, it was time to prove that we could
07:00 walk the walk in practice.
07:02 Hey, coach.
07:02 How are we doing?
07:03 This is looking good.
07:05 Yeah, we're trying to master some offensive drills.
07:10 You know how you prevent that from happening?
07:12 Step towards the target where he's going,
07:15 and then point with your shoulder,
07:17 and then follow through.
07:18 Go.
07:19 Nice.
07:25 Right on the target.
07:26 I'm going to try to play some defense.
07:27 Oh.
07:34 Hut.
07:36 Here's a tip.
07:37 You want to drive with your feet and drive through.
07:40 Keep those feet moving, because then you can get more leverage.
07:45 You want to get under their pads.
07:46 And if you hit them right, then drive them right
07:48 into the ground.
07:49 So let's run it again, and let's see how we do.
07:52 Hut.
07:53 Drive those feet.
07:54 Good job, guys.
07:55 Very good.
07:55 Good.
07:56 He's going to be a problem.
07:58 You're a beast, my friend.
07:59 Let's run again.
08:00 Also, strap up.
08:02 This is how you get knocked out.
08:04 Hut.
08:05 Drive those feet.
08:06 Yeah.
08:07 Yeah, see?
08:08 Good job.
08:09 Good job.
08:10 OK, that's it.
08:11 That's it.
08:11 That's it.
08:12 That's it.
08:12 Way to drive your feet, my friend.
08:14 You see that?
08:15 You beat him.
08:15 I think we can surprise Kenya with their tenacity.
08:18 American football is funny, because none of us
08:20 have been able to play for our country.
08:22 And when you play for your country,
08:23 there's a certain passion and intensity.
08:26 And I'm very jealous that you guys
08:28 get to play for your country and attack them.
08:31 So what we're going to do is we're going to come out there
08:33 and we're going to come with intensity.
08:34 We're going to hit hard.
08:36 We're going to punch them in the mouth
08:37 so fast that they're not going to remember the last time they
08:39 were here.
08:40 Let's get back to it.
08:41 Yeah.
08:42 Here we go.
08:43 Let's get it.
08:45 Yeah.
08:45 Yeah.
08:47 Beast.
08:48 He's a beast.
08:49 This is intensity.
08:50 This is what we need to win.
08:52 Well, now you know how Billy and I ended up in Uganda
08:54 coaching football.
08:55 We go hard.
08:55 But how did these Ugandan kids end up playing football
08:58 in the first place?
08:59 When you watch ESPN, they always show games on TV.
09:02 So that's why I picked up interest.
09:03 And I was glad that I had other people in the country
09:06 thinking the same way.
09:07 I love contact games because I played lacrosse before.
09:10 So I stood and watched them play.
09:11 And it truly piqued my interest.
09:13 The sport got so interesting to me
09:15 that I had to drop all the other activities
09:17 and concentrate on the sport.
09:19 My brother Ken, Gus, we call him Gus,
09:21 team captain, and also Koon.
09:23 Those people had some good experience with this game.
09:25 They knew really so much about it.
09:27 They called me to the game.
09:29 And guess what?
09:30 When I came, I experienced a very beautiful game.
09:33 I love the game.
09:34 Right now, I'm doing nothing.
09:36 The only sport I'm playing right now, it's American football.
09:39 And what exactly do they love so much about the game?
09:42 American football is an inclusive sport.
09:44 The short guys, the tall guys, the fat guys, the slim guys,
09:47 the slow, the fast, everyone has a position
09:49 to comfortably play.
09:50 I feel great when I make a tackle.
09:52 I just love the energy, love the aggressiveness of the game.
09:55 Throwing, I throw hard.
09:57 Mostly here, the contact.
09:59 Touchdown celebration.
10:00 It's the same position.
10:02 At the same time, I also love the brotherhood,
10:04 because it's the brotherhood you find in sports.
10:08 It's very hard to get that elsewhere.
10:09 Putting on the burners, like Tyreke does,
10:13 showing the peace sign, actually the winning.
10:17 And if we wanted to do some winning while in Africa,
10:19 it was time to get down to business.
10:21 The skills they have, what we need to practice
10:25 is the plays.
10:26 Have you guys been running plays yet?
10:28 Yeah.
10:29 Let me see one of your plays.
10:30 Can we line up the whole--
10:32 Hi.
10:36 How are you doing?
10:37 Let me-- can I see the playbook?
10:41 When the coach Googled NFL playbooks,
10:52 we knew we'd have our work cut out for us.
10:54 When there was no playbook, I had this nightmare
10:58 where I was just like, I have to create a whole offense
11:01 and defense from scratch.
11:03 I had a plan just in case that was the scenario.
11:08 We don't need many plays.
11:10 We need three running plays that we go either side.
11:15 And we need to run them very well.
11:17 And then a couple pass plays, just so everyone--
11:20 because it's a very mental game.
11:21 We don't want to confuse them.
11:23 Let's go, let's go, let's go, guys.
11:24 Go!
11:25 All right, well, first thing, I really like what I see.
11:27 You guys are playing with heart, tenacity.
11:29 That is hard to teach.
11:30 You can't teach that.
11:31 You're just born with that.
11:33 And all of you have it.
11:34 The most important thing in American football
11:36 is preparation.
11:37 Everybody here has one specific job to do.
11:41 On every play.
11:41 And you only win games when everyone out here
11:43 does his job.
11:44 So what we're now going to do is work on the plays.
11:47 Because if one of your coaches is in the game
11:50 and he says, we're running dive right,
11:52 we got to know what to do and execute.
11:55 So I think, should we get the starting 11 out?
11:58 We're just going to work on strategy.
12:00 Whichever side the tight end is on is the strong side.
12:05 So we're calling the play strong left, dive left.
12:10 That is a run play.
12:12 Down.
12:14 Set, hike.
12:16 So then you're going to get the ball.
12:18 You're going to run right off his left ass.
12:21 He's going to-- you're going to push your man.
12:23 You're going to want to push him.
12:24 Right.
12:24 You're going to look at that Kenyan motherfucker
12:27 and you're going to run him the fuck over.
12:28 Do you think Billy has been a helpful coach?
12:30 Oh, hell yeah.
12:31 This play is called sweep.
12:34 Should we call it stretch?
12:36 Yeah, I like that.
12:37 This is stretch right.
12:39 Your first step is going to want to be outside.
12:42 Because then you're going to want to hook me in.
12:44 So you're going to hook the guy.
12:45 You're going to hit him.
12:47 And you've got to block him.
12:48 You've got to throw him out the fucking club.
12:50 You're a bouncer in the club.
12:51 You've got to get him out the fucking club.
12:53 Hut.
12:55 So you're going to run outside.
12:57 And then you're going to the fucking end zone.
13:00 Call the huddle and let's try to run this play.
13:02 [INAUDIBLE]
13:05 If you guys block well, then we can do pass plays.
13:07 Go.
13:08 [MUSIC PLAYING]
13:09 Hut.
13:10 Very good.
13:13 Great blocking.
13:15 Hell yeah.
13:15 That's a touchdown, baby.
13:17 This is great stuff.
13:19 Let's clap it up.
13:20 Come on.
13:21 Let's go.
13:22 I was getting a little worried about Billy yesterday
13:24 when he proceeded to drink like 12 beers on the drive home.
13:28 I love that you can drink Ugandan beer in the car.
13:31 He found out that if you turn in your empty beer bottles,
13:34 you get new beers for half the price.
13:36 We're here to hand in empties.
13:37 Oh, thank you.
13:38 You're welcome.
13:39 Do you have cold beers?
13:41 And yeah, we made a lot of pit stops.
13:44 We're going for round two.
13:46 And he was just trading in six bottles,
13:48 getting six new bottles.
13:50 And yeah, I was like, Billy, we got a game to win.
13:53 Maybe mix in a water.
13:54 But I got to say, the moment we showed up on the field,
13:57 he's been coaching his cock off.
14:00 And I'm proud of him.
14:01 Some people can't drink like Billy.
14:03 You drink and still be stable on your job.
14:06 I think that's huge.
14:07 We're going to call this play Kampala.
14:09 So Kampala is everyone runs a fly.
14:13 If he's got one-on-one coverage and he's got no safety
14:16 overhead, then you're throwing that all day.
14:18 Good effort.
14:26 You want to throw that ball with a little more air under it.
14:30 Do you mind if I run the play, just
14:31 to show you how it should be done?
14:32 Here we go.
14:33 Strong left Kampala.
14:34 Strong left Kampala.
14:35 Ready?
14:35 [INAUDIBLE]
14:38 Set hut.
14:45 Did I throw it to the wrong guy?
14:46 You got intercepted.
14:47 [INAUDIBLE]
14:50 Is that the ball you use?
14:52 Can we cut that interception?
14:54 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
14:55 We can cut that.
14:57 Run it again.
14:57 Strong left Kampala.
14:58 And run!
14:59 [INAUDIBLE]
15:00 [MUSIC PLAYING]
15:04 Come on!
15:06 That's a touchdown!
15:08 If you catch that, that's a touchdown.
15:10 Catch with your hands, not your chest.
15:12 We need to look into adhesive spray.
15:15 It's illegal in the NFL.
15:17 It's not illegal here.
15:18 Great work, guys.
15:20 Water up.
15:21 Hydrate.
15:22 What's in the jug?
15:23 Tequila.
15:25 You guys drink tequila at halftime?
15:27 Yeah.
15:27 Guys, if we beat Kenya, we're all
15:32 going to go out and drink a lot of tequila.
15:33 Oh!
15:34 [CHEERING]
15:37 Tequila bottles on me if we beat Kenya.
15:39 Can we bring all the wide receivers quickly?
15:42 Gibbs, receivers!
15:44 All right, so these are the two new pass plays.
15:46 So we all know Kampala, right?
15:48 We're now putting in Buwindi.
15:51 Buwindi.
15:51 Buwindi.
15:52 Then this last one is called--
15:55 Entebbe.
15:57 The plays I chose were simple plays, dive left, dive right,
16:01 stretch left, stretch right, and then just whatever passing play.
16:06 That was just everyone's running the same route.
16:08 That was the only thing I put in.
16:10 Go!
16:10 [MUSIC PLAYING]
16:13 That was a great read, great thought.
16:19 But remember what I told you, you got to throw it a little softer.
16:22 Run it again.
16:23 Hut!
16:24 [MUSIC PLAYING]
16:27 Good.
16:28 What's a word in Ugandan that means like again, that you all know?
16:32 Nera.
16:32 Nera?
16:33 Nera?
16:34 If you hear him yelling nera, you're running the exact same play.
16:39 No huddle, line up very fast.
16:41 The defense is they're like, what the fuck's going on?
16:43 They're not huddling?
16:44 Why are they going so fast?
16:46 And then that's when we get a big gain off them.
16:48 Let's run.
16:49 Nera, nera, nera!
16:50 Nera, nera!
16:51 Ready, set, go!
16:53 Hut!
16:53 [MUSIC PLAYING]
16:56 Let's go!
17:00 George, you got to throw that faster, man.
17:02 Let me show you.
17:02 Down!
17:03 Is that a hut?
17:04 [MUSIC PLAYING]
17:09 But that fast.
17:11 I just sort of blacked out and just designed an offense.
17:14 But no offense is complete without a tush push.
17:17 Or as we would call it, we ganda.
17:20 This is what we're going to do.
17:21 You get behind here.
17:23 You're going to be right behind him.
17:25 This play is what the Philadelphia Eagles run all the time.
17:29 We would run this if we just need like three yards.
17:32 Two yards.
17:33 You guys switch.
17:34 You go right here.
17:35 He's going to snap the ball to him.
17:36 You're going to be right behind him.
17:37 You grab him and just push him forward.
17:40 This is all about teamwork, the collective group of strength
17:44 of all of you.
17:45 Because you're all just concentrating on this one guy.
17:49 And one man cannot take all the force of all of you.
17:52 All right, so let's just practice this now.
17:53 Shoot!
17:54 Up!
17:56 Good, good, perfect.
17:57 No one can stop that.
17:58 If I can lift him and throw him.
18:01 Yes, yes, yes.
18:03 Just make sure he's going forward.
18:05 Up!
18:05 Up!
18:07 Yeah, I like that shit.
18:09 Nearer, nearer, nearer, nearer, nearer.
18:14 Oh, Jesus.
18:15 Yeah!
18:16 That is what we need.
18:18 We should start doing the tush push when we need like 20 yards.
18:21 Dude, if it works.
18:23 [LAUGHTER]
18:25 Imagine that.
18:26 We're just running down the field.
18:27 20-yard tush push.
18:29 All right, guys, I think we need to introduce the coach.
18:33 Yeah, take a knee, boys.
18:34 I'd like to first of all thank you for showing up today
18:37 and showing up every time.
18:38 There's a cause.
18:39 All right, so coach, any last words to the team?
18:44 Hi there, guys.
18:45 Awesome day today.
18:47 Way to work, way to learn.
18:48 I didn't know what it would be like coming here and helping
18:52 you guys coach, but I'm so glad that you guys are here
18:55 because this is a way better situation than I
18:57 could have hoped for.
18:58 You guys listened.
18:59 You guys knew.
19:00 I mean, we just installed a whole offense,
19:04 and we have so much more to do before the big game on Sunday.
19:08 I love your intensity.
19:09 I love your passion.
19:10 Also, this is coach Donnie.
19:13 Donnie, you can call me Wonton Don.
19:15 In the US, you have a lot of people
19:17 who play in high school and college
19:18 while they're in school, and then you
19:20 have people who play in the NFL, and they're
19:21 playing for a lot of money.
19:23 You guys are playing for the love of the game,
19:26 and you're playing for national pride.
19:28 So I appreciate you guys showing up.
19:30 And we gonda beat the shit out of Kenya.
19:33 [APPLAUSE]
19:35 If we show half the intensity we did today when we play Kenya,
19:39 we are going to beat Kenya back to Kenya.
19:42 We're going to send them right back to Kenya.
19:45 They are not going to want to play us.
19:48 1, 2, 3.
19:50 We gonda beat Kenya!
19:53 Let's go!
19:54 [APPLAUSE]
19:56 I need a goddamn beer.
19:59 After practice, we recovered from the African sun
20:01 with some cold suds.
20:03 I've come very close to Eastrup a couple times on this trip,
20:06 and then I just-- I drink a club.
20:08 I feel immediately better.
20:10 Then got to bed early, as the next morning,
20:12 our press tour rolled on.
20:14 6.30 in the morning, and we're on our way to a TV spot.
20:18 We're already in the papers.
20:20 Now we're going to be on TV.
20:22 [MUSIC PLAYING]
20:25 I want to welcome two gentlemen, Coach Donnie and Coach
20:29 Billy.
20:29 Hey, how are you?
20:30 Thank you for having us.
20:31 How does the coaching go?
20:33 Do you have the right training facility
20:36 where the team coaches in?
20:37 And what kind of training do they
20:39 have to go through to prepare for such big games?
20:42 So the Ugandan team, when we arrived,
20:44 was in very great shape.
20:45 That wasn't the problem.
20:47 What we had to focus on when we came
20:49 was strategy and the mental parts of the game.
20:52 Yeah, when you play football, your brain
20:54 is the most important muscle.
20:56 And I think a beautiful thing about the sport
20:58 is it's a lot like war, but it's not war that you
21:01 fight with weapons or hate.
21:03 It's war that you fight with love of the game
21:06 and mental toughness.
21:07 If there is people that are watching
21:09 and would love to join American football, be part of your team,
21:12 is there a recruitment process?
21:14 If you are a very large man, please join Ugandan football.
21:19 And if you want to watch American football,
21:20 you're curious, please come to Legends Sporting Ground
21:23 on Sunday at 3.30 PM to watch the game.
21:26 We have these guys running on all cylinders.
21:29 We have a team that can compete with American teams.
21:33 Thank you so much, Coach Billy and Coach Johnny,
21:35 for joining us this morning on Premier Sport.
21:37 All the best.
21:38 We'll definitely be there this Sunday, me and Jonah.
21:41 OK, so Billy and I just crushed a TV interview.
21:43 But when we walked in, they first
21:45 brought us to the politics room.
21:47 And they were like, you guys are here for the Israel-Palestine
21:49 segment.
21:50 And Stephen corrected them very fast.
21:54 But I feel like we probably would have crushed that.
21:57 If we had gone into that interview
21:58 and they were like, just started asking us,
22:00 we were just like, wait a second.
22:02 But yeah, probably for the best, we got that sorted out.
22:04 [MUSIC PLAYING]
22:06 OK, day two of practice.
22:16 I just got to say, I asked Billy numerous times,
22:19 do we get red visors or black visors?
22:22 And he's like, we got to go red.
22:24 It's in the Ugandan flag.
22:25 Well, black is also in the Ugandan flag.
22:28 And if we had black visors, I wouldn't
22:29 look like a fucking McDonald's employee.
22:31 Coach Johnny is not a McDonald's worker.
22:33 He is a coach.
22:34 Shout out part of my cheesesteak, though.
22:36 Great sandwiches.
22:37 Billy, for the love of God, could you put on some sunblock?
22:41 I hate sunblock.
22:43 He's not going to make it to the game on Sunday.
22:45 He's going to have heat stroke.
22:47 There's no sun right now.
22:48 There is sun.
22:50 This field has pretty much quicksand.
22:53 It's got termite holes.
22:55 It's got hawks.
22:57 And then there's some type of giant stork-like bird
23:00 over there with a six-foot wingspan.
23:02 Holy-- is that a shoebill crank?
23:03 Those are big-ass birds.
23:05 These dudes going to come in and fucking snipe the ball?
23:08 Because I think they can fit a ball in that gullet of theirs.
23:11 Bring it up, even if you're not ready.
23:13 I just wanted to get you guys to hear.
23:14 So yesterday, we had a great practice.
23:16 We put in the whole offense and started with a little defense.
23:19 But today, we are going to concentrate all on defense.
23:22 We're now going to learn how to tackle the right way.
23:26 And one of the most important things when tackling
23:28 is keeping your head up.
23:30 Another important thing with tackling is get low.
23:33 The low man always wins in football.
23:36 Donnie and I are going to do a demonstration right now.
23:38 So you line him up.
23:40 You step, split his body with your foot.
23:44 You step again, and then you lock.
23:47 We're going to do some drills.
23:48 I want everyone to grab a partner.
23:50 Slow motion, don't try to kill the guy.
23:53 I know you're anxious.
23:54 Save it for Kenya.
23:55 The reason we're not doing too much live action hitting
23:58 is because when you see Kenya, you're
24:00 going to be so hungry for it that you're
24:02 going to hit him hard.
24:03 Breakdown.
24:04 Ready?
24:05 Go.
24:06 Now second step, you bring your guns back.
24:09 And then boom.
24:11 It's like an old Western.
24:12 You have your guns back.
24:14 Boom.
24:15 Ready?
24:16 Go.
24:18 Yeah.
24:19 Here we go.
24:22 Very good.
24:23 Everyone watch Coach Donnie.
24:24 Going up.
24:27 The Kenyans don't know what's going to hit them.
24:29 The Kenyans are not football players.
24:30 Now you guys are football players.
24:33 Ready?
24:33 Go.
24:35 A lot of this game is playing through pain.
24:38 I currently have a broken ankle.
24:40 I'm coaching through pain.
24:42 What you must do with that is number one,
24:46 play through the pain.
24:47 And number two, inflict the pain on the Kenyans.
24:50 You excited?
24:51 Yeah, I'm going to fuck them up.
24:53 Let's go.
24:54 I want everyone over here.
24:55 Everyone over here now.
24:57 All right.
24:57 Time to run through defensive formations.
25:00 I don't know how much help I'm going to be here,
25:02 but we'll see.
25:03 What type of defense should we run?
25:05 Well, as the defensive coordinator, zone?
25:09 No, we should probably run a 4-4.
25:15 Um, I like a 4-4.
25:19 Let me get an offensive line.
25:21 Line up just dummies.
25:22 So this is what's going to happen.
25:24 You are always going to line up on either side,
25:28 depending on where the tight end is.
25:30 You're all the way outside, and you're rushing off the edge.
25:35 You don't let anybody run outside of you.
25:36 Donnie will coach you up on that.
25:38 And you want to plug which hole?
25:41 Billy was befuddled.
25:43 Fuck.
25:44 The thing about Billy, he's a very confident offensive
25:47 coordinator, not a very confident defensive
25:50 coordinator.
25:51 I don't really think he knows what he's doing right now.
25:53 Where are you lined up?
25:54 The linebacker.
25:55 You're a linebacker?
25:56 I thought he was the-- wait.
25:57 1, 2, 3.
26:00 Wait a second.
26:00 No, you're the linebacker.
26:02 So he's just trying to work through it right now.
26:04 You're playing overhead.
26:07 Fuck.
26:09 Billy's having a panic attack.
26:11 I know.
26:12 Trying to create an offense and a defense in three days
26:15 is a heavy burden.
26:17 I wish I could help more.
26:18 I can be a defensive end coach all day.
26:21 But when I played football, didn't pay a lot of attention
26:26 to the other positions.
26:27 Run the stretch.
26:28 Stretch right.
26:29 Set.
26:30 You want to dive at his legs.
26:33 How come the biggest man on the field's the only one
26:36 who chased the ball down?
26:38 Why are you standing there?
26:40 Why aren't you chasing the ball?
26:42 What?
26:42 I'm done.
26:43 All right.
26:43 It's a pass.
26:44 It's a pass.
26:45 Stay on the outside.
26:45 We were struggling to find the right personnel
26:47 for our defense, but then noticed
26:49 a bunch of big, athletic-looking dudes
26:51 not even practicing with the team.
26:53 Who are those guys?
26:54 Why aren't they over here?
26:56 Can they hit?
26:57 They look like they can tackle.
26:59 61 looks like a beast.
27:00 He's a beast.
27:01 He's a good lineman.
27:02 Thank God he's here for defense.
27:03 But turned out they were in hot water with the coaching staff.
27:06 You know football is a game of discipline, yeah?
27:08 Oh, and discipline.
27:09 They need punishment?
27:10 Yeah.
27:10 Yesterday they didn't train.
27:12 Today they came in late.
27:13 And it's taking his time to come to the team.
27:15 Do you want me to dress them down and yell at them?
27:17 They think they're the best players?
27:19 I need to strike the fear of a coach in them
27:21 so that they start acting right.
27:23 We learned later the situation was a little more complex
27:26 than just being late to practice.
27:28 But with the game only a few days away,
27:30 we needed all hands on deck.
27:31 The players who are undisciplined,
27:34 we need them to fill in because we need the best guys out there
27:37 to learn the defense.
27:39 I'll yell at them if they act up.
27:41 And thankfully, we're able to convince the federation
27:44 to let them get in the mix.
27:45 Yeah, give me the best 11, even if they're misbehaved.
27:48 I'm hearing from the Ugandan coach
27:50 they have a bit of an ego.
27:51 I'm worried about a clash of egos when they meet Billy.
27:56 So pretend that each of these cones is an offensive lineman.
28:01 I want you on the outside.
28:02 Defensive end.
28:03 We're going to have 61 playing defensive end now.
28:06 I am pumped about that.
28:08 I mean, I think he just has the raw talent to fucking dominate.
28:11 So when you're playing defensive end,
28:13 there's three things that they could do.
28:15 They could be running it inside, in which case
28:17 you need to collapse in and tackle the running back.
28:21 They could be running it outside,
28:22 which means you have to contain.
28:24 You can't let him get outside of you.
28:26 If it's a pass, that's when the real fun stuff happens.
28:30 That's when you just try to destroy the quarterback.
28:33 There's no better feeling in football
28:35 than tackling the quarterback.
28:36 Set, hut.
28:38 Go.
28:40 Great.
28:40 That is how you maintain contain.
28:42 Set, hut.
28:43 So the tight end might hit him a little,
28:53 but then go out for a pass.
28:54 I want you covering the tight end.
28:56 Hut.
28:56 Great defense over there.
29:01 With our best players on the field,
29:03 shit was starting to click.
29:04 Billy might have some D in him after all.
29:07 Pause.
29:08 Coach Billy has been tremendous.
29:09 He has been wonderful.
29:10 Let me just say, he's one of the best coaches
29:12 that have ever come to Uganda.
29:15 The African zone series 24 means a lot to us right now.
29:19 And I think that with Coach Billy and Coach Donnie,
29:22 we can see a lot of progress.
29:23 Billy was a little unsure of himself
29:25 when we first started going through this defensive
29:27 formation.
29:28 Now I think everybody's getting the hang of it.
29:30 And 61 is going to be a problem at the end.
29:34 Very good.
29:35 Very good, you boys.
29:36 Very good.
29:37 He's catching up fast.
29:39 This guy has it down.
29:40 I don't think I can teach him much more.
29:41 It's been really nice.
29:42 I've enjoyed the time with you.
29:44 And I've really learned so much more with this guy.
29:46 Hush, P. Big Steve.
29:49 You?
29:50 Boy.
29:51 Oh, boy.
29:52 That's what the Kenyan team is going to be saying
29:54 when you show up.
29:55 They're going to be going, oh, boy.
29:57 We didn't sign up for this.
29:58 We're about to get destroyed.
29:59 Billy and Coach Donnie could actually
30:03 help to position Uganda to become
30:06 one of the biggest football countries in Africa.
30:09 Now we're going to focus on run defense
30:11 for the rest of practice.
30:12 Billy's going to run them all day today.
30:15 These kids want to go home, but it's our last practice.
30:17 So he said, no, no one's going home.
30:18 But hey, I guess we can play good coach, bad coach.
30:23 He's the bad coach.
30:23 I'm the good coach.
30:25 He's not going to be like, yeah, if you guys want to go home,
30:26 it's fine.
30:26 He's going to be like, no, no, no.
30:27 We're staying until the sun goes down.
30:29 We're practicing until the sun goes down.
30:31 Sorry.
30:32 I'm sorry.
30:32 It's fine.
30:33 Because this is our last practice, correct?
30:36 So we're practicing until the sun goes down.
30:38 I'm sorry, guys.
30:39 But we need to beat Kenya.
30:40 We're not going to beat Kenya by quitting at 2 o'clock.
30:43 We've got to practice until we've done everything we can.
30:45 And there was still plenty to work on, such as goal line D.
30:49 This is a defense where you let your nuts hang.
30:52 What's a good name?
30:54 What is like something scary and strong?
30:57 You call it-- is Cody-- no, Cody?
31:00 Cody?
31:01 No, don't call it that.
31:03 Which, thanks to me, was not called Coney.
31:05 We should call this play Vibranium,
31:07 the material in Black Panther that couldn't be broken.
31:10 Vibranium.
31:11 Don't let him get that many yards.
31:16 And special teams.
31:18 Now we are going to learn field goal.
31:20 Very good.
31:24 We were pleasantly surprised to learn
31:26 that our kicker was filthy.
31:27 This guy hasn't fucking missed.
31:30 Very good.
31:30 That's good.
31:31 Dude, you just hit everything.
31:32 This is very good.
31:33 The Kenyan team's going to be running
31:34 as fast as possible at you.
31:37 Don't get scared.
31:38 They're weak as shit.
31:39 The reason they call you Hush P is
31:41 because the pussies get really quiet
31:42 after you lay them on the floor.
31:44 [LAUGHTER]
31:44 That's right.
31:45 [CHEERING]
31:47 It's pretty simple.
31:47 Just don't let anyone get outside of you
31:49 and destroy the guy with the ball.
31:53 All right, charge down.
31:54 Charge down.
31:55 Fast, fast, fast.
31:56 All right, charge down.
31:57 Charge down.
31:58 Fast, fast, fast.
32:00 Kill him.
32:02 Touch him.
32:04 Pursuit, pursuit.
32:06 While we still had plenty of work to do,
32:08 we only had the field rented for so long.
32:10 I was told by the Ugandan coaches
32:12 it was time to wrap it up.
32:13 Billy wanted to keep these kids here until sundown.
32:15 But the Ugandan coach just said it's time to end practice.
32:18 He's going to be so pissed.
32:20 Hey, Billy.
32:21 They're calling practice.
32:23 You got to practice tomorrow.
32:26 I want to talk to the management.
32:27 This was supposed to be our last practice,
32:29 but Billy wants to bring them back tomorrow.
32:31 I thought it would probably be the smart thing to do,
32:33 but I'm trying to go hippo mode in the Nile.
32:35 Two hours away, you can just go tubing down the Nile.
32:38 That sounds incredible.
32:39 And I think we can go tubing down the Nile
32:41 and still beat Kenya.
32:42 But Billy is just talking to the president of American football
32:46 in Uganda right now, demanding an extra practice.
32:48 We can practice tomorrow 10 to 1 on this field.
32:52 Tomorrow this field is busy.
32:54 No, no, I booked it.
32:55 I talked to Amanda, yeah.
32:57 They need to practice tomorrow.
32:59 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
33:00 Dude, you need to put on sunscreen.
33:02 You're going to die.
33:03 You're not even going to be like a human being by the time--
33:06 Half day tomorrow is cool.
33:08 Half day tomorrow.
33:09 That was supposed to be our last day.
33:11 But there's a special request.
33:14 We are going to practice, but it will not be a hard practice.
33:18 It will be all mental.
33:19 So I know today we did a lot of work.
33:21 I'm proud of you guys these past two days.
33:24 We've done a lot of work.
33:26 I can tell you guys really want to hit,
33:29 and you really want to tackle.
33:30 That means after tomorrow.
33:31 No, no, no, no.
33:32 Sunday you can hit.
33:33 And when you hit on Sunday, you're going to hit so hard.
33:36 It's going to feel so good.
33:37 It's going to be a relief.
33:38 We don't want you to blow your load before Sunday.
33:41 Yes.
33:42 Seeming retention.
33:44 Sunday tequila?
33:45 Yes, the deal is still in place.
33:46 If we beat Kenya, I'm buying bottles of tequila
33:49 for the whole team.
33:49 [CHEERING]
33:52 Let's go.
33:53 We don't take tequila.
33:54 [INTERPOSING VOICES]
33:57 I should have realized some of our players were Muslim
33:59 and thus weren't too thrilled with the promise
34:01 of free tequila.
34:02 If you don't drink tequila, I will
34:04 buy you whatever type of fruit juice you want,
34:07 or maybe some candy.
34:10 Maybe some candy.
34:12 Yeah.
34:13 Hey, virgin pina coladas for the whole team if you don't drink.
34:16 Also, to ensure we win, in the beginning of the game,
34:21 I will be playing with you.
34:23 [CHEERING]
34:27 I will go out for you with you guys,
34:29 and hopefully we score a bunch of touchdowns.
34:31 George and I will mix in, then George will finish the game,
34:34 and we will beat Kenya handedly.
34:37 [CHEERING]
34:39 Arriving in Uganda, I didn't think I was going to play.
34:41 I just thought I was going to coach.
34:43 But then Steven started to say, hey,
34:46 if your ankle's feeling OK, you should really play.
34:49 And not only from Steven, from the sports minister
34:52 when we met with him was like, you should really
34:54 play for Uganda.
34:55 Like, you're our guest here.
34:56 I was like, screw it.
34:58 How am I going to let this bum ankle
35:00 prevent me from helping out the Ugandan-American football team?
35:05 And once I told the guys, they were pumped.
35:07 Thank you guys for having me.
35:08 Hey, don't just him.
35:10 Him too.
35:11 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
35:12 I just need cleats and pads.
35:14 What you gonna do?
35:15 I'm getting a sack.
35:16 1, 2, 3.
35:17 Jackals!
35:19 I just found out I'm playing in the game.
35:21 I haven't played a down since I won a Chinese Super Bowl
35:23 in 2018.
35:25 And I was benched in that Super Bowl for absolutely
35:28 whiffing on a tackle.
35:29 But on Sunday, redemption is spelled, beat Kenya!
35:33 [GRUNTING]
35:36 [MUSIC PLAYING]
35:39 I'm going to pull a bicep if I keep doing this.
35:47 Let's do that tire.
35:48 Later that night, we went out to enjoy Ugandan nightlife.
35:54 But with only one practice left, we
35:57 could only think of one thing--
35:59 beating Kenya.
36:01 Would we have the team ready to go by game day?
36:04 Would I have a chance to go hippo mode in the Nile?
36:06 Find out next week on Last Chance Uganda.
36:14 [MUSIC PLAYING]
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36:32 ♪ Estonia ♪