Frasier Season 4 Episode 24 Odd Man Out
Frasier Season 4 Episode 24 Odd Man Out
Category
📺
TVTranscript
00:00Oh, Roz, listen, I managed to get some reservations at the San Gennaro's tonight, I thought we'd
00:07go celebrate your birthday.
00:09Oh, that is so sweet, but I have a date with that waiter we met at lunch yesterday.
00:15You're going out with that guy?
00:17I didn't have enough for a tip.
00:21Keep in mind the service wasn't that good.
00:23Well, the reservation won't go to waste, I can always take Niles.
00:28Niles?
00:30You know, your entire social life consists of going out with your brother.
00:34Don't you think you're getting into kind of a rut?
00:37You're still young, you need to go out and get drunk.
00:42Wake up in some stranger's bed, not even remember how you got there.
00:45In other words, exchange my rut for yours.
00:47Well, do what you want, but you know what?
00:52You could shake up your life every once in a while, do something spur of the moment.
00:57Once, I finished work on a Friday and hopped a plane to Acapulco and I didn't pack anything
01:02but my toothbrush.
01:03Oh, yes, yes, I definitely recall you calling in sick one Monday morning with a mariachi
01:07band in the background.
01:09Well, I was sick.
01:20Hey, Dr. Crane.
01:22Daphne.
01:23I'm glad you're here.
01:24My zip's stuck.
01:28Oh.
01:34Good thing I got here when I did.
01:38Don't be afraid to grab hold and give it all you've got.
01:43Okay.
01:47Sometimes pulling it down a bit helps.
01:51Okay.
01:54Oh, dear.
02:02I've zipped my tie under your dress.
02:07It won't come loose.
02:08Oh, let me see.
02:10Oh.
02:12I'm sorry.
02:13It is stuck, isn't it?
02:15Maybe some liquid salt from the powder room will help loosen it up.
02:24Niles, there's something on your tie.
02:35Dr. Crane was helping me with my dress and now he's cold.
02:39Yes, he is.
02:42Hello, me.
02:43Take care.
02:44Oh, dear.
02:45All right.
02:46Oh.
02:47Oh.
02:48Oh.
02:49Oh.
02:50Oh.
02:51Oh.
02:52There we go.
02:54What a relief.
02:55I was just about to step right out of this dress and embarrass poor Dr. Crane to death.
03:02Well, we all have to die of something.
03:09Oh, Niles, I managed to score some reservations tonight at San Gennaro.
03:13You up for a little Italian?
03:15Actually, I'm going out with Maris, so I guess you could say I'm up for a little Episcopalian.
03:22Fair enough.
03:24Like some sherry?
03:25Yes, thank you.
03:26So, it seems your counseling sessions must be going very well.
03:30They are.
03:31So tonight we thought it would be a kick to recreate our very first date.
03:36Oh, that's sweet.
03:38Hey, Dad.
03:39In fact, that day my car was in the shop, so I'm here to borrow Dad's car just like I did back then.
03:45Just saying that makes me feel so young.
03:48Gee, Dad, can I borrow the car?
03:52I did that twice on the phone, and I didn't find it cute then.
03:56Here you go.
03:57Thank you.
04:01I just can't picture Maris with Dad's 82 Impala.
04:06Could she at first never forget the look of wonder on her face of touching vinyl for the first time?
04:13She said it made her feel cheap and dirty, and she liked it.
04:20I was her first bad boy.
04:23Uh-huh.
04:25Yes, I remember the way you used to carry your inhaler around rolled up in the sleeve of your T-shirt.
04:37So, how about you two? You guys want to join me for dinner tonight?
04:41Oh, sorry. Sherry's cooking me dinner tonight.
04:44And I have a date with Greg.
04:46Greg? I don't believe I've met him yet.
04:47I have. He's gorgeous.
04:50Well, he is.
04:55Certainly the best-looking man I've ever been out with.
04:58Of course, he doesn't have a thought in that pretty little head of his.
05:02Oh, this could be the one.
05:07You know, Frasier, maybe I could have Sherry cook for me some other time.
05:11Oh, no need to put yourself out of my account, Dad.
05:14Dad, did you happen to check this message?
05:17No, I don't touch that thing.
05:20Hi, it's Laura.
05:22We're getting an extra day of rehearsal, so I'm coming in tonight instead of tomorrow.
05:26American flight 11, 1030.
05:29Can't wait. Bye.
05:31Great news. Laura's in town.
05:34Who's Laura?
05:35A stranger who called my machine by mistake.
05:39Here it is, table for two, Dr. Frasier Crane.
05:43From the radio, yes?
05:45Yes.
05:47Oh, you know, actually, my date canceled, so it'll just be me.
05:51I see, sir.
05:53Table for one.
05:58Well, there is no need to lower your voice.
06:02It's a pleasure to meet you.
06:06Well, there is no need to lower your voice.
06:10It's not a shame to dine alone.
06:13Perhaps as a man of some celebrity, I can serve as a symbol to others
06:17who might otherwise be afraid to do so.
06:19I mean, really, you know, in some cases, it's actually preferable to sit and dine alone
06:23rather than listen to someone too much in love with his own voice prattle on endlessly.
06:30Well, you've convinced me, sir.
06:34I'll see if your table's ready.
06:39Dr. Crane, your table for one is ready.
06:50Listen, is it possible for me to have a table elsewhere?
06:55I mean, I feel just a bit conspicuous right here.
06:58I'm very sorry, sir, but they're all reserved.
07:02But don't worry. Most of our patrons only have eyes for each other.
07:06Very well.
07:19I'm so sorry, sir.
07:21It's perfectly all right.
07:23Because I'm alone doesn't mean I'm lonely.
07:26Perhaps I could have a glass of your house cabernet.
07:31Thank you.
07:47Hi.
07:49Hello. What's your name?
07:51Johnny.
07:53How come nobody's sitting with you?
07:56Well, that's a bit complicated, Johnny.
08:01My mom and dad said it's okay if you come sit with us.
08:04Oh, well, that's a very, very sweet offer.
08:08And, look, I know it's hard for a young boy to understand,
08:12but, you know, really there's nothing wrong with someone eating by himself.
08:17You know, one time I was really bad at school
08:20and the teacher made me eat lunch all by myself.
08:24Oh, well, I bet they gave you an opportunity to think about your actions, didn't they?
08:28No, I just cried.
08:33Run along, Johnny.
08:39Your glass of cabernet, sir.
08:41Oh, thank you.
08:43Oh, and I see your candle has gone out.
08:45Enrico! Please, stop, stop, stop.
08:48Tonight I prefer to just dine in the shadows, thank you.
08:53Excuse me.
08:55Are you here by yourself?
08:57As a matter of fact, I am.
08:59Oh, I see.
09:01Oh, I see.
09:03Oh, I see.
09:05Oh, I see.
09:07Oh, I see.
09:09Oh, I see.
09:11Oh, I see.
09:13Oh, I see.
09:15Oh, I see.
09:17Oh, I see.
09:19Oh, I see.
09:22As a matter of fact, I am, yes.
09:24I was hoping you'd say that.
09:26Would you mind if I...
09:28Oh, good Lord, yes. I've been sitting here actually hoping someone would...
09:34...make good use of that chair.
09:36Thank you.
09:40Oh, of course, I'll marry you.
09:44Sorry for the commotion, folks.
09:47Oh, gosh, is that our fault?
09:49Listen, let me pay for the dry cleaning.
09:52Not to worry, not to worry.
09:54Congratulations, you two.
09:56Here's to young love.
09:58Well, as long as we're all sharing good news...
10:03...my wife just told me that we're having twins.
10:11Now that I've already interrupted all of your meals...
10:14...I'd just like to share my joy with everyone here.
10:18To Amanda...
10:20...my future bride...
10:22...I will love you every day of my life.
10:25And I hope that when we die...
10:27...it's at the exact same moment...
10:30...so that neither one of us will ever have to spend even one second alone again.
10:36Thank you.
11:02Hi.
11:06Johnny said I could eat with you.
11:24Hey, Frey, how was your dinner?
11:27Not since Quasimodo strolled the streets of medieval Paris...
11:30...have so many people uttered the phrase...
11:34...that poor man.
11:38I'm sure it wasn't as bad as all that.
11:41Oh?
11:44Oh, dear.
11:46The highlight of the evening came when...
11:49...the entire staff of waiters delivered...
11:52...the birthday cake that I had ordered for Roz...
11:55...and neglected to cancel.
11:58They sang to me.
12:02It's not your birthday.
12:04Staying right up with the stories, as usual, Dad.
12:09Anyway...
12:11...after dinner, I took a long stroll...
12:14...and it suddenly struck me.
12:17I'm single.
12:20And I'd gotten accustomed to thinking of myself...
12:23...as recently divorced.
12:27Recently divorced, but that was five years ago.
12:32I'm 43, and I'm alone.
12:36Hey.
12:38I got something that'll cheer you up.
12:40I brought you some of Sherry's mock apple pie.
12:46It's called mock...
12:48...'cause they use crackers instead of apples.
12:52Good.
12:55It's an apple pie like apples.
13:01Hello, Niall.
13:03Oh, what happened?
13:05Let me guess.
13:07Robust color, fruity bouquet.
13:09I'd say that's an amusing little Merlot.
13:11Cabernet.
13:13Well, still amusing.
13:16So, did you and Mrs. Crane enjoy recreating your first date?
13:19Oh, yes.
13:21My merits remember details that I'd forgotten.
13:24So, when I brought her home after the restaurant...
13:26...we took a stroll around the grounds.
13:28Suddenly, Marta appeared on the balcony...
13:31...playing the part of Meris's late father.
13:34She was liquored up on Rob Roy's...
13:36...and firing Swedish meatballs at me...
13:38...from an antique blunderbuss.
13:45Damn it.
13:47Am I the only one in this household that checks this machine?
13:51Hi, Molly. Laura again.
13:54Is that Tom on the machine?
13:56He sounds nice.
13:58Anyway, I just called to remind you...
14:00...I'll have my cello with me.
14:02Translation, you might want to clean out your car this time...
14:05...to make room.
14:07I know.
14:09Anyway, I can't wait to see you guys.
14:12I've been on my own way too much lately.
14:14See you at 10.30.
14:16Flight 11.
14:18Love you. Bye.
14:20It's too bad there's no way to call her back.
14:23She's going to be stranded at the airport.
14:25Don't worry. She'll take good care.
14:27You know that happens a lot.
14:29People leaving wrong messages.
14:31And after hearing a stranger's voice like that...
14:34...it always starts me wondering what they must be like.
14:36Oh, you can't really judge what a person's like...
14:38...just from the voice.
14:40That's true. I was once told that I sounded...
14:42...imagine the impertinence...
14:43...uptight.
14:50And me?
14:52You'd picture some cranky old geezer.
14:57I've lost track of what point we're making.
15:02She sounds to me like a very interesting woman.
15:05Intelligent.
15:07Speaks French.
15:09I always loved the name Laura.
15:11Hey, Brasier.
15:13You know, that was going to be your name if you were a girl.
15:15Really?
15:16Yeah. Your mother always wanted Priscilla...
15:19...but I never liked the nickname Prissy.
15:21I never much cared for it either.
15:33You know, Dr. Crane...
15:35...this Laura sounds like she might just be...
15:37...a perfect match for you.
15:39If you left now, you could meet that plane.
15:41Honestly, Debbie.
15:43A couple of phone calls, you're fixing us up already.
15:45Think about it.
15:48She plays the cello. You'd like that.
15:50She appreciates neatness.
15:52She expresses affection easily.
15:54That's good.
16:00Well, pardon me for growing a little, okay?
16:07She did mention being on her own too much.
16:09So we know she's available.
16:12Sure is fun to speculate, but I...
16:14...come on, you can't seriously be suggesting that...
16:17Why not?
16:19I can't imagine a more exciting way to meet.
16:21The woman of your dreams steps off a plane...
16:23...and there you are to rescue her.
16:25Oh, yeah.
16:27You can't beat meeting somebody in a romantic way.
16:29That's the way it was with me and your mom.
16:31You met mother over the chalk outline...
16:33...of a murder victim.
16:37So? It was romantic to us.
16:41Ever wonder why on our anniversary...
16:43...she'd make those gingerbread cookies...
16:46...with the legs kind of bent...
16:48...and the head kind of crooked?
16:54We thought they were dancing.
17:03I met a boy in a cute way once.
17:05I was 18 and visiting Stonehenge...
17:07...and this dashing young man came up to me...
17:09...and told me he was an actual...
17:11...descendant of the Druids.
17:14Boy, is that the one place that line would work.
17:18I met someone once...
17:20...flying home from college.
17:22I got bumped into first class...
17:24...found myself sitting next to a positively ravishing woman.
17:26She was a bit older...
17:28...and I was trying desperately to be suave...
17:30...so when she leaned over and suggested...
17:32...we join the Mile High Club...
17:34...rather than admit I was unfamiliar with the term...
17:36...I whispered back...
17:38...I really don't travel enough to make that worthwhile.
17:44God, that was 20 years ago.
17:50Nope, still can't laugh about it.
18:02Hi Molly, Laura again.
18:04Is that Tom on the machine?
18:06He sounds nice.
18:08Anyway...
18:11She likes the sound of my voice.
18:15She's called me twice today...
18:17...that's already the best relationship I've had this year.
18:24So, are you going?
18:27Maybe.
18:29Oh, I don't know.
18:31There's nothing worse than when you look back...
18:33...on a missed opportunity.
18:35What the hell?
18:37Oh, this is so exciting.
18:40God, I can't believe I'm actually doing this.
18:42Frazier, before you go...
18:44Stop right there.
18:46Don't say another word to me.
18:48I'll never do anything this impulsive...
18:50...if I stop to overthink it.
18:52Just let me get the hell out of here...
18:54...before I change my mind.
18:56But not before I change my shirt.
19:10Thanks for all your help.
19:12I can take it from here.
19:16Uh, Laura?
19:18Looking for Molly?
19:20Yes, I am.
19:22Molly sent a driver?
19:24Oh, no, no.
19:26I'm not a driver.
19:28I'm a psychiatrist.
19:30I'm here to help you.
19:33Molly's having me committed?
19:35No, no.
19:37I'm Dr. Frazier Crane.
19:39Oh, from the radio.
19:41Yes.
19:43You know me.
19:45Yes, I've heard your show.
19:47It's great.
19:49But your knowing me is just weird.
19:51Oh, well, actually, you left...
19:53...a couple of messages on my machine today.
19:55My mistake.
19:57Oh.
19:59I'm sorry.
20:02Oh, no.
20:04I must have gotten my sister's new number wrong.
20:06I didn't want you waiting around...
20:08...for someone who wasn't coming.
20:10So you came all the way down here?
20:12What are you?
20:14Like the nicest guy in the world?
20:16Yes.
20:18Yes, I am.
20:20Speaking of nice, I would be delighted...
20:22...to drive you to your sister's home.
20:24Oh, no, no, no.
20:26I'll take a cab.
20:28Are you sure?
20:31Listen, could I buy you a drink...
20:33...just to say thank you?
20:35Yes, I'd love that.
20:37May I take your cello?
20:39I checked my cello.
20:41This is my purse.
20:43I think that's funny.
20:45Why doesn't anybody laugh at that?
20:47I don't know.
20:49It is funny.
20:51I love it.
20:53So, are you with an orchestra?
20:55With a chamber music group, actually.
20:57We're based in Alabama.
21:00We're based in L.A., but we travel quite a bit.
21:02I grew up here.
21:04So it's always nice to come back.
21:06I miss it.
21:08So, what will you have?
21:10I think I'll have a glass of sherry.
21:12Two?
21:14Not that you can expect that much...
21:16...from airport bar sherry.
21:20Oh, goodness.
21:22Don't I sound like the perfect snob?
21:24Yes.
21:27I mean...
21:29...I agree with you about the sherry.
21:33So...
21:35...why did you choose the cello?
21:39When I was around 11...
21:41...my father took me to the symphony.
21:43This sounds a little silly...
21:45...but when I heard the cello...
21:47...it sounded sad...
21:49...like it needed me.
21:51That's not silly.
21:53That's lovely.
21:55I was always an odd kid.
21:57All my girlfriends had posters of David Cassidy.
21:59I had Pablo Casal.
22:01I had Sigmund Freud.
22:03But did you kiss him every night...
22:05...before you went to bed?
22:07Well, I was tempted to, but...
22:09...he just would have read too much into it.
22:15Oh, here. Thank you.
22:17I don't believe I've ever shared a drink...
22:19...with a psychiatrist.
22:21I'm worried that you must be analyzing me.
22:24My diagnosis so far is that...
22:26...I...
22:28...I can't find a single thing wrong with you.
22:38Actually, it's quite good.
22:40Yes.
22:42My second pleasant surprise this evening.
22:46Frasier...
22:48...maybe I'm misreading you here, but...
22:50...I'm married.
22:53Oh.
22:57I don't know why I jumped to the conclusion...
22:59...that you were single.
23:03Is there something in your message about...
23:05...having been...
23:07...on your own too much lately?
23:09Oh, I've been away on tour.
23:15Well, I guess by now you've probably figured out that...
23:17...my coming down here wasn't entirely...
23:19...the act of a good Samaritan.
23:23More like a lonely Samaritan.
23:27I guess that makes me seem sort of desperate.
23:29No.
23:31I think it makes you seem sort of romantic.
23:33I used to do things like this...
23:35...when I was single. It was fun.
23:37Clearly, you were better at being single than I am.
23:39Oh, come on.
23:41Let me ask you a question.
23:43How did you feel...
23:45...coming down here?
23:47I felt...
23:49...completely exhilarated.
23:52Marriage is the most fun I've had...
23:54...in recent memory.
23:56Exactly.
23:58The anticipation, the excitement, the hope.
24:00Marriage is the death of all that.
24:06I hope you didn't write your own vows.
24:10I'm not down on marriage.
24:12It's just marriage can be great...
24:14...but so can not being married.
24:17I suppose.
24:19Well, you're...
24:22...intelligently talented.
24:24Able to look at the bright side of things.
24:26I'm getting more disappointed by the moment.
24:30I'm sorry it didn't turn out the way you wanted.
24:32Oh, don't be.
24:34Look, I really did have fun.
24:36You know, it's not very often...
24:38...that I do something impulsive.
24:40Well, maybe you should.
24:46Well, I really should be going.
24:48Oh, no.
24:51I'm the nicest guy in the world, remember?
24:53I'll remember.
24:57Okay, wait a minute.
25:01This is probably a ridiculous thing to say, but...
25:03...if I weren't married...
25:05No, you don't have to finish that, but...
25:09...thank you very much for starting it.
25:13Oh.
25:15Over here.
25:17Excuse us.
25:20If you ever think back on this, could you just...
25:22I'll just edit that part out.
25:24Thank you.
25:36Excuse me.
25:38Did you just hear that gate change announcement?
25:40No, no, I'm sorry.
25:43Perhaps I can help you with the ticket counter.
25:45Oh, good idea.
25:47Thank you.
25:49Where are you headed?
25:51Mexico.
25:53How about you?
25:55Oh, well, I'm just going to finish up my sherry...
25:57...and then I'm off to...
26:01I'm going to Mexico.
26:03Really?
26:05Acapulco?
26:07This is uncanny.
26:11What hotel are you staying at?
26:13Villa Bella.
26:15Well, that's where I'm staying.
26:18Hey, baby, I hear the blues are calling
26:20Tossed salads and scrambled eggs
26:24Quite stylish
26:26And maybe I seem a bit confused
26:28Well, maybe
26:30But I got you picked
26:34But I don't know what to do
26:36With those tossed salads
26:38And scrambled eggs
26:41They're calling me, I don't know what to do
26:43With those tossed salads
26:45And scrambled eggs
26:48And again
26:50Fraser has left the building