Welcome to Plathville S6 Episode 8 - I Was Born on Highway 111

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Welcome to Plathville Season 6 Episode 8

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00:00Larissa, do tell.
00:02Would you say you're looking for something specific with dating or are you just kind
00:06of like open to anything right now?
00:09The first date that I went on post-divorce, I did not suspect anything when he said, do
00:14you want to go home and meet my cat?
00:16So I very quickly learned that I don't really know a lot about a lot.
00:24Veronica and I are doing really good.
00:26I tried to hide for a while.
00:27It didn't work.
00:30I look at you and me as like we're basically married.
00:33It's like the commitment level that we have together.
00:36Is marriage in your future?
00:42That's awkward silence.
00:46I can't wait to hear your new album.
00:49It's been really hard for me to see Mariah go through another painful relationship breakup.
00:55This time though, she just picked herself up and she's just like, okay, I'm taking over
01:00the world now.
01:01I mean, I'm proud of that girl.
01:05Are you going in?
01:20Depends on how cold it is.
01:23It's cute.
01:24Oh my God.
01:25Look at the sailboat.
01:26It's so pretty.
01:27My mom would say, I want to be out there.
01:30We're at one of the beautiful beaches today here in our backyard.
01:34I think the last time she and I were at the beach was our second date.
01:38A year and a half ago.
01:39We go often.
01:42It's like when you live next to it, you take it for granted and never go and you just get
01:47busy.
01:48Right here?
01:49No.
01:50A little in.
01:51You want to sit on the edge?
01:52Yeah.
01:53Veronica and I have recently decided to take our relationship public and so far it's going
01:56good.
01:57Here.
01:58My biggest worry about going public is my privacy.
01:59Micah being in the public eye, he's sort of a tell-all book and I'm a book with a lock
02:00on it.
02:01But him being so open about his life and me being the complete opposite, we've learned
02:02to counterbalance each other.
02:03It's a lot of work.
02:04It's a lot of work.
02:05It's a lot of work.
02:06It's a lot of work.
02:07It's a lot of work.
02:08It's a lot of work.
02:09It's a lot of work.
02:10It's a lot of work.
02:11It's a lot of work.
02:12It's a lot of work.
02:13It's a lot of work.
02:14Him being so open about his life and me being the complete opposite, we've learned to counterbalance
02:20each other.
02:21So going well, but we'll see.
02:25I brought my frisbees.
02:27What do you love about Micah?
02:29Okay, so what do I love about Micah?
02:31Oh my God, there's a lot of things.
02:33Go catch.
02:34What do I look like, a dog?
02:39There goes your shoes.
02:44First, I call it golden retriever energy.
02:48I love his personality, his being, how he enters a room, his outlook on life.
02:53Veronica, catch.
02:55No.
02:56It doesn't hurt that he's good looking, but to be honest with you, one of the first things
03:03I thought about Micah was like, oh, he's not going to like me.
03:05I'm a little bit taller than him, but he does.
03:09We completely don't look at that.
03:12We couldn't care less, so.
03:17In a lot of ways, we're opposite.
03:19I'm definitely more out of the box, more adventurous than my girlfriend is.
03:22She's the homebody.
03:23Yeah.
03:24What?
03:25I don't like being alone.
03:26Okay.
03:27I don't like laying like this.
03:28Why not?
03:29It's very awkward.
03:30Lay on your side then.
03:31You're going to get covered in makeup.
03:32Veronica is definitely the most opinionated out of the two of us.
03:39She's not a pushover.
03:40You can't get your way around her.
03:44You got to earn.
03:45Let's see what good you are at this.
03:46Ready?
03:47No, I suck at this.
03:48Also, I love her work ethic.
03:55I find that very, very attractive, but she's a little bougier than I am.
04:02She likes electric vehicles.
04:04She likes pink, Paris Hilton, Taylor Swift.
04:06I like motorcycles, diesel trucks, guy stuff, I guess, and she doesn't really care about
04:12those things.
04:17We got to recreate what we did on our second date.
04:19You tried to throw me in the water.
04:20You can't do that.
04:21What are we doing?
04:22What are we doing?
04:23I'm just kidding.
04:24Last time you weren't kidding.
04:25You chucked me in and I was like, who is this guy?
04:26I didn't chuck you in.
04:27You did.
04:28It was a little pond in the middle.
04:30I didn't throw you in.
04:31I probably walked in there with you, but I didn't get you wet.
04:32I know I wouldn't have done that.
04:33You got me soaking wet last time.
04:34I would not have done that.
04:35No, you would have, because you did.
04:36I would have remembered that.
04:37Because you did.
04:38You're frustrated sometimes.
04:39I know.
04:40Don't you love it?
04:41Take your glasses off.
04:42I can't see.
04:43You're pretty without your glasses.
04:44I can't see.
04:46I don't need to see anymore anyway.
04:52I like playing around and teasing and goofing off.
04:57You know, have a kick in your step and be happy and look on the bright side of things.
05:06and goofing off, and, you know, have a kick in your step
05:09and be happy and look on the bright side of things.
05:14You need to get that rock.
05:16Yes.
05:22Mine's nicer.
05:27Look at mine.
05:29Are you in love?
05:31Are we in love?
05:32He's not going to say. I'm waiting for him first.
05:37I'm going to give you some humility today.
05:43I think we're in real love.
05:45It's not all bliss, but we love each other.
05:49I think that's a good answer.
05:51It's a safe answer.
05:53Yeah. No, it's not all...
05:56It's not all happy and roses 100% of the time.
05:59Yeah.
06:00But it is a lot of the time.
06:02I guess it's genuine love.
06:03Yeah.
06:07Oh, goodness gracious.
06:10Is this all one word?
06:13No.
06:14Where's the spaces?
06:16No!
06:19I win. What was it?
06:22That sucks. You didn't win.
06:24Yeah, I did. What was it?
06:25You had one guess left.
06:27What was it?
06:28This is what it was.
06:30Oh, I guessed L.
06:33No, you didn't.
06:34Yes, I did.
06:35You never guessed L.
06:36You guessed B-A-T-S and then V.
06:39I fell for you.
06:42No, I fell for you.
06:45Oh, thank you.
07:01It's so nice outside today.
07:02It's so nice outside today.
07:03I literally just want to get some fresh air and run around
07:05and do some poop and kick up some dust.
07:07And same, milk an udder.
07:09Lydia Grace is in town for a few days,
07:11and I thought it would be kind of fun to go out to a farm,
07:16milk some cows.
07:18I grew up on a farm,
07:20and I've always missed it since I left.
07:23I was the one that oversaw all, like, the milking chores.
07:26That was my world.
07:28I think I was really scared to explore that
07:31when I was with Ethan,
07:33because if I were to have said, like,
07:35oh, I miss country life and the farm and all these things,
07:38he immediately would have taken that
07:40as I wanted to settle down in Cairo, Georgia
07:42and have 10 kids and be barefoot and homeschooling and all of this,
07:45and I didn't want that life.
07:47Now, being single, I feel like I'm in a place where I can be like,
07:51oh, I really miss nature and animals and the farm,
07:54and I really miss that hard work,
07:56and I don't want the life that I grew up in,
07:59but I want to revisit it in my own way.
08:02I told you about, like, the little get-together
08:04we're going to have while you're here.
08:06We're going to talk about sexy sex.
08:08Yeah, I don't even know exactly what this entails,
08:10but a friend of mine was like,
08:12hey, I know someone who does, like,
08:14little gatherings for, like, 20-somethings, whatever,
08:18I guess any age, but, like, all he had to tell me
08:22was that she would talk about sex,
08:24and, like, the games would be swag bags for me to be like,
08:26yep, sign me up.
08:28Since being out and, like, dating,
08:31going on dates, hooking up,
08:34I'm realizing that I actually have way more handicaps
08:37than I thought I did.
08:39What I knew about sex growing up was
08:42don't have it until you're married,
08:45and that resulted in so much misinformation,
08:48even as a teenager.
08:50Like, I remember being a teenager and thinking I could get pregnant
08:53and, like, sitting too close to a guy.
08:56Having only been in one long-term relationship,
08:58and the fact that I was with someone
09:00who also came from the fundamental world,
09:02now being out on my own,
09:05I feel like I'm realizing for the first time
09:08how much purity culture really f***ed me up.
09:11Yeah, it affects you mentally, doesn't it?
09:13That's why I married the first boy that I held hands with.
09:16The other thing that I was told is, like,
09:19once you are married and you can have sex
09:22and you don't go to hell,
09:24your job is to make him happy.
09:27Your job is to please him. It's about him.
09:30And so...
09:33that worked, being married for a few years,
09:36because Ethan was told the same thing.
09:39But that doesn't work for me anymore.
09:42But there is this one guy that I've been on a few dates with
09:45who, like, isn't like that. He's very understanding.
09:48As I've continued to see this guy on the East Coast,
09:51we've been on a few dates, and, um...
09:54I think the feeling of safety that I feel
09:57when I'm with him has enabled me to
10:00be a little bit more maybe honest with myself
10:03about insecurities I feel like I have
10:06and lack of knowledge that I have about sex.
10:09I want to face that head-on,
10:11because I don't want to struggle with that
10:13years and years down the road.
10:17Oh, red silos.
10:19Uh-huh.
10:21Look at the little cow heads poking out!
10:24Oh, I'm so excited.
10:26I'm gonna milk a cow, and then I'm gonna hug a cow.
10:29laughs
10:32We got a pretty good fire going.
10:35I haven't gotten into anything with my little sisters
10:38about my divorce with Olivia. I feel bad about it
10:41because it's like a bad example,
10:43and because I don't want that to ever happen for any of them.
10:46Everyone knows what we're doing tonight, right?
10:48I'm scared.
10:49Tonight we are setting up for a little
10:51sex education pizza adult night.
10:54What is the most sensitive part on the vulva,
10:56and what is its purpose?
10:58Can I have a...
11:00The vulva... vul...
11:02Beep!
11:03laughs
11:05laughs
11:16Girls, let's go get sticks.
11:18Yeah.
11:20Anything you guys can get, throw it in the center.
11:28Today we're at the farm,
11:30and I'm just gonna hang out with my little sisters.
11:35We need paper.
11:38I miss doing this.
11:39Yeah.
11:40Maybe that'll get going.
11:43My favorite memories at the farm
11:45were climbing trees, riding horses,
11:48and even to this day,
11:50me and Olivia getting married.
11:52We got married at the farm.
11:57And that's still in my memory.
11:59Just such a beautiful day.
12:05Yeah.
12:11I don't think I've talked to you guys about it very much,
12:14but you guys do know me and Olivia aren't together anymore.
12:18Yeah.
12:21And we are officially divorced, right?
12:25Mm-hmm.
12:27Yeah.
12:29I've talked to all of my family
12:31about my divorce with Olivia.
12:34I haven't gotten into anything with my little sisters about it, really.
12:37I feel bad about it because it's like a bad example,
12:40as their older brother, with my marriage not working out.
12:43I have to be a better example in the future.
12:47I don't want that to ever happen for any of them.
12:52I already knew that Ethan was getting a divorce,
12:54but part of me wants to, like, talk about it
12:56and, like, know, like, why and what that looks like
12:59and, you know, just details.
13:01He's not that open of a person, you know?
13:03He doesn't talk that much about, like, himself, so...
13:06I just wanted to be quiet, just in case he wanted to say anything.
13:09It's not something you really want to talk about.
13:11It's like you want to know, but it sucks to talk about.
13:13We got a pretty good fire going for how wet everything is.
13:17Mm-hmm.
13:19I feel like I have learned an immense amount
13:21from my divorce with Olivia,
13:23but I feel like there's still so much to learn.
13:26Every day, I'm scratching the corners of my mind,
13:30looking for things that I can take into the future
13:34so I don't make the same mistakes.
13:37For example, cooking is a way to a man's heart.
13:42There are roles that a man plays
13:44that are different than a woman plays.
13:46When's the last time you cooked a meal?
13:50I was not saying in any way
13:52that every woman in the world should be in the kitchen
13:54cooking three meals a day.
13:56That's not at all what I meant.
13:59Back when we first got married,
14:01when Olivia used to cook dinner...
14:05It's a little crispy because I was distracted, but there you go.
14:07That's fine, thank you.
14:09I felt taken care of for and thought of and loved.
14:12In the same way I took care of her cars
14:15and anything that needed to be fixed,
14:17you know, it was just what we did for each other.
14:20But by the time I said that,
14:22she hadn't cooked a meal in two years.
14:25When she stopped, it just felt like...
14:31she didn't really care.
14:33My comment that I made
14:35was not about cooking three meals a day.
14:37I was not feeling loved, and I was very angry.
14:41If I could go back, I would say it differently
14:44and have a discussion in a very different way
14:47than just losing it and everything spilling out at once.
14:51It never had to go this way
14:57To the heart of me
15:00I want a quarter horse so bad.
15:02I want a piece of land, a dog, and a quarter horse.
15:15Here's a piece of land.
15:17Thanks.
15:21Thanks.
15:26Being back at the farm
15:28reminds me of all the good things from my childhood
15:30and the fun times that I kind of forgot about
15:33in all the drama of the last couple years.
15:36Sun's starting to come out.
15:38What do you guys want to do? Go for a walk?
15:40Yeah. Let's smokey.
15:42I've done a lot of thinking about
15:44what the true problem was
15:47with my family, me and Olivia.
15:50I mean, Olivia was just consumed with
15:52all these problems she saw with the way we were raised.
15:55And I think what it comes down to
15:58is Olivia hated the way that she grew up
16:03with her family and the problems that her family had.
16:06And at the end of the day,
16:09was rewriting everything for herself
16:12and what she believed,
16:14and she had to reject everything else.
16:16This is nice.
16:18It's pretty.
16:22It was just all negative.
16:24Very, very, very negative.
16:26And it doesn't have to be that way at all.
16:28Where's Ethan?
16:30He's right here.
16:32Hi. I'm hi. How are you?
16:37I feel like my childhood was mostly good
16:39and I would totally move back to Cairo at some point.
16:42Oh, Ethan, look at the cow!
16:45Look at the cow!
16:49Moo!
17:04Cows!
17:06Oh, my gosh.
17:08Hi, baby.
17:10Ooh, Olivia, look at that big one out there.
17:12Hi.
17:15For all the things about my childhood that were not great,
17:19being outside with animals was great,
17:23and I love when I get to revisit that.
17:26Isn't it so nice to be back on a farm?
17:28What's your name? You don't have a tag?
17:31You don't have a tag? What's your name?
17:34Find some friends?
17:36Lots of friends.
17:38Lots of friends.
17:40I'm Olivia. I'm Zach. Nice to meet you.
17:42Okay. Nice to meet you.
17:44We grew up on a farm. We had cows and goats,
17:47and we used to milk cows and goats,
17:49and recently we've been having a debate
17:51about who knows how to milk a cow better.
17:53Okay.
17:55So we kind of had to settle that score.
17:57Okay, well, we've got a setup right now.
18:00Look at the little baby.
18:02So this cow is a beautiful, easy cow to milk.
18:05She's already leaking, yeah.
18:07What I would suggest is you get one of you on each side
18:12I told farmer Zach that I grew up on a farm,
18:14and so did my sister,
18:16and he was kind of like, all right, yeah, come on out.
18:20Like, can help feed the animals,
18:22maybe have a little friend time together,
18:26but also rivalry.
18:28You ready, lid? Yep.
18:30May the best woman win.
18:32So on the two buckets, there's like a line
18:34inside of these buckets.
18:36It's whoever gets to the line on that bucket first.
18:42You're okay. You're okay.
18:49It very much is like riding a bike.
18:51Lydia, remember when we were kids
18:53and we would just squirt it directly in our mouth?
18:55I do remember that.
18:57Are you hinting at something?
18:59Man, how do you do this these days, just a little?
19:01Okay, if we're milking to the line in the bucket,
19:03I'm over mine.
19:05That is mostly foam, ma'am.
19:07No, it's not. See? You cannot see a sticker on mine.
19:09See that sticker on that one there?
19:11But mine is not mostly foam.
19:13Lydia, it's the same amount.
19:15No, it's not. You know it's not.
19:17You know, your sister is kind of blowing you out of the water.
19:19Yeah. I'm also just connecting with the cow.
19:21I guess I just didn't care about competing
19:23once I started milking.
19:25I just connected with that cow.
19:27That's what I want to do. So was I.
19:29That's why she let down really fast for me.
19:31I just want to connect to the cow, and I don't want to rush it.
19:33Yeah, I don't want to rush the beautiful things in life.
19:35You definitely won, and I will give you that.
19:37I really don't care.
19:39Thank you, because I do.
19:41I know you do.
19:43This is unbelievable.
19:45Call us anytime.
19:47It's so nice as adults
19:49to be able to come back to a farm
19:51and reconnect with animals.
19:53I feel like in some ways
19:55my life has always been defined
19:57by who I needed to be for other people,
19:59whether that was a good daughter
20:01or a good wife
20:03or a good sister-in-law
20:05or a good sister-in-law
20:07slash stand-in mom at some points.
20:09And this is the first time
20:11in my life that I don't owe
20:13anyone else a role.
20:15I don't have to fit a narrative.
20:17I can just be me.
20:19And that's both exhilarating
20:21and very scary.
20:23Can I let her out of the headlock?
20:25Farm work is
20:27dirty and sweaty
20:29and hard, and it's also
20:31at the same time so fun.
20:33So ten years of my life,
20:35very formative years of my life,
20:37I was milking goats and cows
20:39and mucking barns and baling hay
20:41and doing all of these things.
20:45I want to integrate it back into my life
20:47in my own way.
20:49I can be a career woman and I can live in a city
20:51that makes me feel invigorated and stimulated
20:53and I can still go out to the farm
20:55and milk a cow and get my feet dirty
20:57and remember the simple,
20:59beautiful things in life.
21:01I want to have both.
21:03And I've never felt like I could have both before.
21:05This has been so much fun.
21:09Come by anytime.
21:11No problem.
21:17Oh my gosh.
21:19You're going to drink that whole thing.
21:21Everything to her is new.
21:23She called me during the Super Bowl
21:25and asked me who Usher was.
21:27I promise you I'll share.
21:29Thank you so much.
21:31I'm going to laugh.
21:33What else do you expect?
21:35I said, who's Usher?
21:53Sydney!
21:55Look at you strutting.
21:57I met Sydney through the studio
21:59that I record at.
22:01We really hit it off and we've been very good friends
22:03ever since.
22:05Are you ready for your life to be changed?
22:07Yes.
22:09We're going to go and get the best cinnamon roll
22:11you've ever had in your life.
22:13Anytime I'm in Tampa,
22:15I just go down and see her.
22:17We want a cinnamon roll
22:19and she wants a coffee.
22:21Sydney's like an older sister.
22:23She gives good advice and she's a good person for that.
22:25Oh my gosh.
22:27Oh my gosh.
22:31This looks so good.
22:33You're going to drink that whole thing.
22:35I love
22:37teaching Mariah new things,
22:39taking her to do new experiences
22:41because
22:43everything to her is new.
22:45She called me during the Super Bowl
22:47and asked me who Usher was.
22:49She's like a little kid.
22:51I just love being around her because
22:53it makes everything feel like it's the first time again.
22:55I promise you I'll share.
22:57Oh, thank you so much.
22:59I'm going to lean over for some
23:01and it's going to be good.
23:03She said that the artist was Usher.
23:07I didn't...
23:09I'm going to laugh.
23:11What else do you expect?
23:13I said, who's Usher?
23:15Have you heard of
23:17Beyonce?
23:19Have you heard of Taylor Swift?
23:21Yes.
23:23Do you know who she's dating?
23:25No.
23:27Who's Doja Cat?
23:29That's one.
23:33This is my first one of the year.
23:35Oh.
23:39I told you.
23:43Wow.
23:45I'm going to have icing all over me now.
23:47That is so good.
23:49Good?
23:51I haven't seen you in what?
23:53I don't know.
23:55Tanya just asked me, when's the last time you saw her?
23:57I was like, I don't know.
23:59It doesn't feel like it's been that long
24:01but it really has.
24:03You moved back home.
24:05Who do you live with?
24:07With my dad.
24:09He has a huge household.
24:11My dad is my roommate.
24:13How is that?
24:15Don't get me started.
24:17You're living with your bestie.
24:19He is my bestie.
24:21Back in September
24:23that was my last month here in Tampa
24:25I was going through a hard time
24:27and just was like
24:29I need to be near my family pretty much.
24:31That's normal.
24:33You just have to
24:35getting heartbroken is a
24:37life situation.
24:39Everybody goes through it.
24:41It's just an experience in my life
24:43that was so private
24:45but it was the most damaging one ever.
24:47It was a situation that you went through
24:49and God got you out of it.
24:51I was in a relationship
24:53and I've never experienced that much
24:55like
24:57heartbreak and pain before.
24:59I loved somebody else
25:01more than I loved myself.
25:03Maybe that's a good thing because it gave it my all.
25:05The man that I thought I knew
25:07was everything I ever wanted
25:09and more
25:11and would never
25:13do what he did.
25:15I don't understand any of this
25:17and that's
25:19confusing to me.
25:21The thing that really keeps me going
25:23is like I know for a fact
25:25that one day I'm going to look back and see why this happened.
25:27It's just a season.
25:29Just trusting that that's one day
25:31where I'll be at.
25:33Nobody has perfect seasons in life all the time.
25:35Just navigating through the tough ones.
25:37The most important part is
25:39don't
25:41I guess you can realize that it sucks
25:43and feel bad for yourself every once in a while
25:45but don't let that consume you.
25:47Don't just fall into that
25:49victim mentality or whatever.
25:53I ended things
25:55with this person
25:57not because I didn't love him.
25:59I still deeply loved him
26:01but
26:03there's a lot of things I don't know.
26:05A lot of missing pieces. A lot of questions I have
26:07that I just feel like I'll never get the answers to
26:09and I have to come to terms with that
26:11but it is
26:13hard.
26:15It is hard trying to move
26:17forward with just all these
26:19questions in my head constantly.
26:21Did you love me? Did you care
26:23about me? Did you
26:25mean any of
26:27what parts of it were true?
26:29What parts of it weren't true?
26:31I guess where I'm at
26:33with relationships I guess
26:35I mean I'm not looking for anything
26:37for sure. I have fully
26:39placed my identity
26:41in that person.
26:43It's easy to do that and then it's hard
26:45to realize I did that.
26:47Who am I apart from this person? They become your everything.
26:49Just make sure that no matter who you're
26:51with that they're not knocking
26:53you down and you just kind of unconsciously
26:55don't even realize it.
26:57That's what one of
26:59my songs, Undeserving, talks about.
27:03I've almost finished my album.
27:05We're going to be shooting
27:07a music video soon and
27:09I want
27:11as many of my family members
27:13that want to participate, I want them to participate.
27:15When I'm writing
27:17a lot of music I want to show you.
27:19Make an album and get the air conditioned in your car.
27:21That would be a good idea.
27:29So we're going to be starting with
27:31an anatomy pop quiz.
27:33Who can tell me where the vagina is located
27:35on the vulva? Who can show me on the puppet?
27:37In between here.
27:39Where? You want to open it up?
27:41Oh my god, it opened!
27:57Let's go.
27:59Will's back in town.
28:01Will and I got really close
28:03when we were both living in L.A.
28:05Will's one of the friends that
28:07I can talk to literally about anything.
28:09Will
28:11has met my girlfriend
28:13and the first time he met her
28:15Veronica and I were
28:17in like a little argument.
28:19Maybe a little bigger than a little.
28:21And then
28:23you're like, whew, that's over with.
28:25It'll never happen again.
28:27Will, did you know that was a
28:29small one?
28:33What have you been doing?
28:35You know, I got a job at the healthcare union.
28:37It's a lot tougher.
28:39But it's going well. I don't know.
28:41How about you, though?
28:43What about you and your girlfriend?
28:47My girlfriend and I have had
28:49ups and downs.
28:51Yeah.
28:53So every relationship has them though.
28:55You're not alone there.
28:57My life has definitely changed
28:59a lot recently.
29:01Tied down.
29:03Not an untieable knot yet.
29:05I haven't tied
29:07the knot, you know what I'm saying?
29:09It's a lot of work.
29:11Because in the beginning, everything's bliss, you know?
29:13And when those first arguments
29:15come, then it's a little rocky.
29:19I love her and I want to
29:21be with her.
29:23But it's a big learning curve.
29:25What's kind of been creating friction
29:27for you guys recently or over the past couple months?
29:29There's times where
29:31I'll go out of town and
29:33my girlfriend will feel like
29:35I've abandoned her.
29:37I don't see how she
29:39feels that way.
29:41Maybe I don't talk to her
29:43as much because I'm hanging out with my
29:45family, doing stuff up there.
29:47But I still call her three times a day.
29:49Are you lit?
29:53That's what Will suggests.
29:59It's kind of funny because
30:01I'm the only person in my entire family
30:03that's, or at least the only guy
30:05that's in a relationship in my family.
30:07And of a lot of my friends,
30:09now I'm the only one that's in a relationship.
30:11So, either I'm
30:13I think I'm in the lead and you guys
30:15just got to catch up.
30:17But there are definitely some things I miss
30:19about being a little more free.
30:23What about your dad? Talk to him about it at all?
30:25I talked to him a little bit.
30:27His advice was you just got to figure out
30:29if you're going to commit.
30:31Before he said that, I was kind of like, I have committed.
30:33I made this move.
30:35What does commitment look like for you? Is it the move? Is it a ring?
30:37Yeah, I know the way my dad said it,
30:39he means a ring.
30:41What are you thinking about that?
30:43I go back and forth.
30:45Before I settled down with Veronica,
30:47my friends would have called me, you know,
30:49a bit of a player.
30:51You know, I used to
30:53I used to explore.
30:55It's a natural thing.
30:57And when I think about it, you know, I'm only 22.
30:59I am young.
31:01I am, you know,
31:03very adventurous and very free-spirited.
31:05But she's the first girl
31:07that's meant this much to me.
31:09She's amazing.
31:11She's the first girl
31:13that's meant this much to me.
31:15She's amazing.
31:19So, you know,
31:21there's pressure, like,
31:23and there's a lot running through my mind sometimes.
31:25It's like, am I making the right choice?
31:27Take it at your own speed.
31:29Yeah, I'm just learning.
31:31Yeah, life is interesting.
31:33Cheers to that.
31:43I don't have enough wine glasses,
31:45so I'm just gonna offer people
31:47wine out of glasses.
31:49Yeah, that's fun.
31:51Can I give you one of the not-so-fun?
31:53Yeah, absolutely.
31:55Tonight we are setting up for
31:57a little sex education
31:59pizza adult night.
32:01Do you want more?
32:03A little bit of wine,
32:05helps the sex ed go down a little bit better.
32:07Okay.
32:09Okay, as long as that's the only thing
32:11going down.
32:13As I've continued to see this guy
32:15on the East Coast,
32:17I've realized how little I know
32:19about sex,
32:21and I want to change that.
32:23There's a lot of ways
32:25I could educate myself.
32:27I could check out a book from the library
32:29and read a book.
32:31I could Google anything,
32:33or I could also just throw a little fun party.
32:35You know, sometimes the awkward things
32:37just need to be said.
32:39I have perfect friends to be awkward with.
32:41You want to dive in?
32:43Or should I eat it all?
32:45No, Kapish, you're the delivery guy.
32:47You don't eat it.
32:49I'm the one who's supposed to eat these pizzas, bro.
32:51Hello!
32:53Your hair looks so good.
32:55Thank you so much.
32:57Mariah and I met Hayden and Kapish
32:59when we visited Micah in L.A.
33:01Alright, you guys ready?
33:03Well, that's you.
33:05Wow!
33:07That's really good.
33:09And when I moved out here,
33:11I reconnected with them.
33:13Okay, so Micah, do you guys
33:15still talk to him or no?
33:17I haven't heard from him in, like, ages.
33:19Me either.
33:21Fair enough.
33:23Everyone knows what we're doing tonight, right?
33:25I'm scared.
33:27Hi!
33:29How's it going?
33:31Hi, my name is Jocelyn,
33:33and I'm an apartment coach and sex educator.
33:35So this evening, with Olivia, Lydia,
33:37and her friends, I've planned a really fun
33:39sex workshop where we're going to be opening up
33:41a conversation around sexual anatomy
33:43and sexual preferences.
33:45Alright!
33:47That's great!
33:49I feel like this is a magic bag.
33:51You're going to keep pulling stuff out that we're not expecting.
33:53Exactly.
33:55As I see Jocelyn unpacking her bag
33:57and taking everything out, I'm just like,
33:59is this for, like,
34:01a look kind of experience?
34:03Like, you look at it?
34:05Or is this, like, a hands-on experience?
34:21So, I just kind of want to go around
34:23and ask, like,
34:25what do you want to get out of today's workshop?
34:27So who would like to go first?
34:29No!
34:31I was going to say you!
34:33I can go first,
34:35since it was my idea.
34:37You're full!
34:39Kidding, kidding. Very excited.
34:41In this period of my life,
34:43I'm newly divorced. I was talking to my sister a lot
34:45recently how we grew up in a home that just,
34:47sex was a taboo subject, and
34:49didn't talk about it, didn't know anything when I got married,
34:51and now I'm, like, out and dating
34:53again, and it's been something
34:55that's cropped up a lot in my life of, like,
34:57why do I still have residual shame?
34:59I think I didn't know what I didn't know
35:01prior to dating this guy
35:03on the East Coast, and then seeing
35:05how comfortable he is
35:07with his sexuality, and
35:09exploring it, and having fun, and
35:11how important it is to him in his life,
35:13and how important it is to him in a partner,
35:15that's when I started to realize
35:17how many hang-ups I had.
35:19We are very physically compatible,
35:21and I want to explore that
35:23a little bit, but
35:25there are moments when I would react
35:27and be like, oh no, I don't want to do that, or like,
35:29oh, that doesn't, I don't know how to do that,
35:31so then that feels scary.
35:33Like, I don't know how to say what I like, I don't really know what I like,
35:35I am scared of looking dumb
35:37in front of someone who's a lot more experienced.
35:39Alright, so who else? What do you want to get out of tonight?
35:41How are you feeling about tonight?
35:43Go ahead.
35:45Increase
35:47my maturity in the matter.
35:49Amazing, I love that.
35:51I laughed when I saw the
35:53dildo.
35:55And you know, like, maybe after this
35:57I'll see it and I'll be like,
35:59good. An old friend.
36:01Great.
36:03I am actually very impressed
36:05by Hayden and Amanda
36:07coming to this party together, but then also
36:09learning together, and laughing
36:11together, and
36:13I want that kind of, like, camaraderie
36:15and understanding, and
36:17fun in a relationship.
36:19So we're going to be starting with
36:21an anatomy pop quiz.
36:23Oh, I know this.
36:25Okay, okay.
36:27Alright, so we're going to start with female anatomy.
36:29This is my, not my vulva,
36:31but this is my vulva, my vulva puppet.
36:33Okay?
36:35Okay, great. So, who can tell me
36:37what is the most sensitive part
36:39on the vulva, and what is its purpose?
36:41Hayden.
36:43Um...
36:45Can I have a...
36:47The vulva is...
36:49The whole thing?
36:51It's the clitoris.
36:53Yes, that is the clitoris.
36:55And what is its purpose?
36:57I have no idea.
36:59Alright, cool. Well, you get a prize for
37:01saying the clitoris, that was true.
37:03Sex chocolate, awesome.
37:05Okay, so your hand was up too, right?
37:07So do you know what the clitoris' purpose is?
37:11Arouse it?
37:13More specifically?
37:15Arouse a specific person?
37:17Arouse what person?
37:19The person who has
37:21the clitoris?
37:23Yes.
37:25I don't think that Capiche knew
37:27that it was going to be this deep.
37:29Sex is a very
37:31taboo, like a very weird topic
37:33to talk about.
37:35And that's why I feel like Capiche was very
37:37uncomfortable today.
37:39But...
37:41Yeah, was he? How uncomfortable was he?
37:43I feel like he was very uncomfortable.
37:45Yeah.
37:47Do you think you
37:49could help him?
37:51Oh my god!
37:53Who can tell me where
37:55the vagina is located on the vulva?
37:57Who can show me on the puppet?
37:59In between here.
38:01Where? You want to open it up?
38:03Oh my god, it opened!
38:05Fun fact, you know when people get their clitoris
38:07pierced? It's not pierced
38:09on their clitoris, they pierce their clitoral hood.
38:11And the clitoral hood is the piece of tissue
38:13that's above the clitoris.
38:15So it doesn't hurt, like if you pierce the clitoris
38:17that would really hurt.
38:19There's a...
38:23There's a hoodie over the
38:25clitoris.
38:27And I didn't know that.
38:29And I'm glad I do.
38:31Now you know where to look, under the hood.
38:33Yeah, you check under the hood.
38:35Make sure everything is running okay.
38:37See if they need an oil change.
38:39And then, you know...
38:41Send them under the hood.
38:45Alright.
38:47What currently holds you
38:49back from being fully present
38:51and engaging in your sexual expression?
38:53The lack of men.
38:55No, I'm just kidding.
39:01I think honestly, like communication.
39:03After being taught for so long
39:05that the woman is made for the man.
39:07Like there's this fear of
39:09expressing needs.
39:11And I am proud to say that I am definitely
39:13working on that and
39:15experiences and experimenting
39:17around and I think that's very important.
39:19How many of you have ever been in a situation
39:21where like you've shared something with someone
39:23sexually and they've kind of like
39:25freaked out on you?
39:27How did that feel?
39:29Um...
39:31Unnecessary.
39:33That's a good word.
39:35Like why?
39:37I'm the person I chose to be with and
39:39explore things with and if you're not open to that
39:41what do I do?
39:43I'm stuck.
39:45You know it's actually one of the biggest things that I work with
39:47with couples is that they fall in love
39:49they're like so happy
39:51like in the beginning they talk about finances
39:53and family and education
39:55and life dreams but sex
39:57never gets brought up.
39:59So then they're in this long term relationship
40:01and they're unhappy because they never address
40:03the compatibility piece around sex.
40:05Compatibility is so important.
40:07Which is funny because if you bring it up
40:09people will say like oh that's kind of shallow
40:11but it's not shallow at all if it's such a big part of your life.
40:13No because it's like
40:15okay if that piece isn't working then like
40:17we need to talk about it right?
40:19I think I am starting to feel
40:21less shameful about
40:23sex in general and I think
40:25this guy I've been seeing has greatly contributed to that.
40:27Post divorce he's
40:29the only person that I
40:31have like gone on a date with
40:33that I've explained my background
40:35more fully. He's very
40:37encouraging and supportive and
40:39to have someone meet me and be like that's okay
40:41I'll meet you right there
40:43I think that gives me a lot of confidence to
40:47yeah I guess own my sexuality more
40:49and become more educated and not feel
40:51so ashamed moving forward.
40:55Thank you so much for having me.
40:57Did you guys enjoy it?
40:59Did you guys have a good time?
41:01Does the guy you're seeing
41:03does he have a name?
41:05The guy that I'm seeing does he have a name?
41:07Yes.
41:09What's his name?
41:11His name is Brendan.
41:13Do you plan on seeing this Brendan again?
41:15I think I'll see this
41:17Brendan again.
41:19We've been on a few dates and
41:21obviously we're long distance right now
41:23and not exclusive but
41:25I wouldn't mind if we were.
41:27Alright goodnight
41:29y'all have a good one.
41:31Thank you so much.
41:33Let's keep those questions going.
41:35Let's do it.
41:39Hello, hello.
41:41We're in Tampa at the
41:43rental that Mariah got
41:45for the whole family
41:47to help her make her music video.
41:49It's been a while since Barry and I slept
41:51under the same roof.
41:53You can stay with me.
41:55If fights break out
41:57I'll just sit back and enjoy
41:59the show.
42:01Alright, welcome to
42:03Speed Dating with the next fun thing.
42:05I'm super excited you guys are here.
42:07I know that she's dating somebody now that she's serious about
42:09but I feel like there's so much that life has to offer.
42:11There's a lot to experience when you're
42:13single and not attached to somebody.
42:15If you had one night with me
42:17what would you want to do?
42:19These songs are birthed out
42:21of the pain she went through with
42:23that guy.
42:25I have never met
42:27a master deceiver like that before.
42:29I just had to get up and go
42:31because I didn't want to be there for them.