Abonne toi chakal !
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AmusantTranscription
00:00 *Music*
00:20 Tonight I'm coming!
00:21 *Music*
00:29 Ok, it's official, I just bought 10 000 Falafels!
00:31 Wait, what are you going to do with those 10 000 Falafels?
00:34 I would even say more!
00:35 What are you going to do with those 10 000 Falafels?
00:37 Well, I'm going to redistribute those 10 000 Falafels to the people of the Third World, let's see!
00:40 Oh yeah, ok, so the guy is improvising as the new Messi, what?
00:43 Lionel Messi, the one who just signed at PSG, the club of the French capital.
00:47 But no, the other one, the one who walks on the water, you know?
00:50 Tonight I'm coming!
00:51 Wait, did he say "Tonight I'm coming" or did I dream?
00:53 No, no, no, he said "Tonight I'm coming", it means "I love life" in Rasmoken, I know.
00:56 So, Dr. Malarm said that I had 10 at each ear, so I can tell you that he said "Tonight I'm coming".
01:02 Tonight I'm coming!
01:04 Yes, we heard you when you yelled at him from the bathroom, the walls have ears, and me too, asshole!
01:08 But you're only 11, so calm down, it's illegal, ok, baby cutter?
01:12 I don't care, I'll go to Texas and do it, but tonight I'm coming!
01:14 Oh, he's determined, little Timothée, it reminds me of his age with a goatee.
01:18 But don't encourage him, he's going to get a MST while he doesn't even know what it is!
01:22 And if a game knows what it is, it's a football team, and even if once they won the shot.
01:25 No, Timothée, an MST is a sexually transmitted disease that can kill you, so don't forget to take cover!
01:31 Don't worry, Carlos, I never go out without my cap, and if it's a little too cold, hop, a little kawe, like that, the drops of water are protected.
01:38 Well, it's a trash bag because I got my kawe stolen by cockroaches, but you got it!
01:42 Wait, it wasn't cockroaches, I saw it with my own eyes, it was a guy in a Mickey Mouse costume!
01:46 Yeah, but he had a knife too!
01:48 It was a ball, not a knife!
01:50 Yeah, but it was a stinging ball, and he threatened me, in a threatening way, I felt it, I felt threatened!
01:54 No, he just said "Oh, hi friends", and you threw your kawe at him!
01:58 Yeah, but I don't like mice, it's good, and Mickey Mouse is a stinging ball, does Mickey Mouse hate him tonight? I don't think so!
02:04 I'm the one who hates Mickey Mouse!
02:06 But you're the stinging ball with your shitty costar, it looks like Willy Wonka who went to Soch!
02:10 He managed to say "not at Soch" without arguing, he's too strong!
02:14 Yeah, I admit, I dragged myself a little under the shower, between a shampoo and a bralette.
02:17 But we don't give a fuck about your two-shot slogans, I'm the only one who's shocked by this situation!
02:21 What situation? This situation?
02:24 You were found guilty of murdering the multiverse, and you are now sentenced to death!
02:29 No, not this situation, I'm talking about the fact that a person is accepting a grudge with this stinging ball!
02:34 First of all, it's Mr. Stinging Ball, I beg you to respect me when I wear a costar!
02:39 Yeah, that's true, I always say it, people who wear costars are obviously respectable people!
02:43 Oh, but you're the world champions of head-breaking, you two, you pissed me off, I'm out!
02:48 No, please, don't go, don't leave me alone with these two kids, please, please, please!
02:52 Ok, I'm coming back, but it's just because I have nothing else to do, I have no life, ok?
02:55 I'm useless to society, I could die tomorrow and no one would realize it!
02:58 Ok, you blew up the mood, otherwise, Timothée, don't you have a picture to show us your new movie?
03:03 I'm not going to lie to you that I always keep a little picture of her close to my heart, you see, like...
03:08 Hop!
03:09 But it's Scarlett Johansson, bro!
03:11 Oh yeah, no, no, that's the wrong one, don't worry, wait...
03:14 Here, hop, that's the right one!
03:16 Perfect! The gadget is fresh!
03:19 So, I didn't tell you that tonight I was going to...
03:21 Wait, wait, where's the girl? Where did you meet her? Are there other girls like her?
03:25 Oh, that's a secret of polychineal that I only revealed under the pressure of a cookie!
03:29 Oh, if you only need that, here, I still have one on me!
03:31 Oh, your arm is super long, bro!
03:34 Oh, that? Don't worry, it's to make it easier to put the fittings together!
03:37 Ok, alright, well, perfect, thanks for the cookie, then!
03:41 No, don't thank me, I put cyanide in it, so how did you meet her, you must have filmed it!
03:45 I don't know if you know the website, it's called Instagram!
03:48 No, I don't know, what is it?
03:49 Instagram is a social network invented in 2010,
03:51 it allows you to share your best photos to collect as many likes as possible,
03:55 and so, boost your ego!
03:56 That was a rhetorical question, Timothée, everyone knows what Instagram is, right?
04:01 Oh yeah, I know what Instagram is!
04:03 And even my grandma knows what Instagram is!
04:05 Well, ok, let's admit it, and how much did you pay her to let her spend time with you?
04:10 I'll make you say that she sent me a message first, actually!
04:13 She sent you a message? Ok, it's official, the world has lost all reason.
04:18 Great, so this is the moment I'm going to be bald, right?
04:20 Oh, well, the Ragnarok is near, my friends, the four knights of the apocalypse are about to besiege the world!
04:25 Don't listen to them, they're angry, they're just jealous, Timothée!
04:28 So, where are you taking her for your first encar? I'm all for it, I'm listening!
04:32 I admit I was going to go on a little rocket league session as a duo, and then, during the extensions,
04:37 I'm going to go bald, but if you have a better idea, do it! I'm all for it, Carlos!
04:42 So, the best thing, Timothée, is that we watch your whole conversation together,
04:45 so we can analyze each other's tastes and, together, establish a plan of attack.
04:49 Well, her last message was "I'm excited and I need you, if you want to fuck me, click here, emoji aubergine,
04:56 and then there's a link, https/"
05:00 Oh, there it is, the girl! I knew the world hadn't lost all reason, I never lost confidence!
05:05 Well, yes, that's it, he's in! Well, yes, it was sure it was a fake from the start!
05:09 A fake account, but whatever, it's the love of my life!
05:11 Oh no, Timothée, not today, not now, not after everything you've done!
05:15 Does that mean I'm not really going to Ken tonight?
05:18 No, you're not going to Ken, you're just going to get all your money stolen!
05:21 Be careful, kids, don't click on the links promising you wonders like sex, a PS5 or an iPhone 15,
05:28 you're just going to get hacked, and hacking is evil!
05:32 This was a prevention message presented by Infosmile, subscribe to Chakal!
05:36 You can go on Tipeee to enjoy many games, but you can also go on Twitch, it's really fun too!
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