Gogglebox.S25E07
#EntertainmentUniverseXTC
#EntertainmentUniverseXTC
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00:00Keep walking, keep walking.
00:02Too fast.
00:03THEY LAUGH
00:04Oh, me.
00:06Oh, I'm running.
00:09Oh, oh, oh, oh.
00:11Oh.
00:12Oh, I'm going to go off the...
00:14Oh, stop it, stop it!
00:16I can't beat it myself.
00:17Stop it, Dad, stop it, stop it!
00:20Oh, quick!
00:21I'm going to fall.
00:23Oh.
00:24Freaking hell.
00:26HE GASPS
00:28Oh.
00:30Oh, you nearly killed me then.
00:34Oh, that's me. YOLO.
00:36HE GROWLS
00:37You always get one, don't you?
00:38What's going on here?
00:39That was my weekend ruined.
00:40I've got Lion King tickets.
00:42HE GASPS
00:43Right, I'm not watching any more.
00:44Who shot him?
00:46Him.
00:47Yoo-hoo.
00:48Yes, yes, yes.
00:49Oh, no.
00:50I like it already.
00:51Is that a bomb? What is it?
00:52Oh, man.
00:53Oh, well, I...
00:54Oh, no!
00:56Oh, it's bleeding.
00:57HE GASPS
00:58Oh, I'm getting all ghosty.
00:59Well, what exciting times we live in.
01:02In the week we bid a fond farewell
01:03to heavyweight grilling legend George Foreman,
01:07we enjoyed lots of great telly.
01:10It was all jazz hands at the ready on BBC One.
01:13MUSIC PLAYS
01:19You saw Dreamgirls, didn't you?
01:21Dreamgirls.
01:23Yeah, but...
01:24Dreamgirls will never leave you.
01:27It's not the same as...
01:28What do you see?
01:30You people gazing at me.
01:32CH-CH-CH-CH-CH.
01:34Turning around on the music staff
01:36that's wound by a key.
01:38CH-CH-CH-CH-CH.
01:39Turning...
01:41No, you missed...
01:42Oh, I hate when you get the lyrics wrong.
01:45We couldn't take our eyes off this on Netflix.
01:48Did you do it?
01:54Who?
01:55I would 100% believe you.
01:57If that was you...
01:59Let's say you.
02:00In fact...
02:01Me or him?
02:02No.
02:03LAUGHTER
02:04You check it.
02:05If it was either of you in that same situation,
02:08that was, I believe you, 110%.
02:11And abracadabra, David Blaine was back on Disney+.
02:15My next stop is in Indonesia,
02:17where there's an incredible group of people
02:20who perform a practice called debus.
02:22Debus.
02:23Yeah? Do you all get debus?
02:26No, I get a taxi.
02:27LAUGHTER
02:28Oh, that was good.
02:37In North London...
02:39Armani, do you want to see what I bought?
02:41What?
02:42One of those, like, policeman books.
02:43What?
02:44You know the ones that policemen have?
02:46Yeah.
02:47..sisters Amira and Armani.
02:49Yeah, they come out like this, look, in the movies, look.
02:51Watch them, like...
02:52Right, so, when did this happen?
02:54LAUGHTER
02:55Amira...
02:56And what are you writing on this, please?
02:59I'm making notes in it of, like, an infringement book.
03:02What? Yeah, so I'll write you up.
03:05And what's on there? Training?
03:08No, like, stuff, training and stuff, numbers.
03:10And you couldn't use a normal notepad for that?
03:13No, because I want to look like I'm doing some important business,
03:15like policemen do.
03:17Um, this is me going around...
03:18You're actually delusional.
03:19What do you mean?
03:20I look at everyone, I go like this, look.
03:23On Saturday night, ITV were keeping it in the family
03:27with some brand-new hosts for a brand-new game show.
03:30There's two brothers, isn't it? Yeah, Thomas's.
03:33Yeah, they say they're going to be the new Ant and Dec.
03:35Really? Yeah.
03:37100 everyday heroes...
03:39CHEERING
03:41..play stupidly simple games.
03:43Stupidly simple, a bit like you.
03:46Oh, I see.
03:47It's part of the infantilisation of society, this.
03:51They drop this egg, then they are out of the competition.
03:53Oh, Robbie's done it!
03:55I've done that game where you have to catch the potato on the fork.
03:59The party games. Parties you have at home, isn't it?
04:02With one golden rule.
04:04What's that? What's the golden rule?
04:06Don't...
04:07CHEERING
04:08..come...
04:10..last!
04:11You can't get more simple than that, can you?
04:17Ant and Dec have definitely said no to this.
04:21Now, I'd like to think, out of 99 people,
04:25I'd at least come 97th.
04:29Oh, there they are, both head to toe in Matalon.
04:32I used to fancy Ryan when he were Jason in Corrie.
04:34Oh, yeah, he were a bit of eye candy when he were Jason,
04:37the Builder, weren't he?
04:38Are we ready to go?
04:40Yeah!
04:41Show me your first stupid game.
04:46Is it like Squid Game, Mary?
04:48I don't know.
04:49For this game, you will each be given a T-shirt
04:53that is frozen stiff.
04:55So, they've got to get the frozen T-shirt on?
04:57Oh, I'd hate that.
04:58Oh!
04:59This is what you do at sleepovers.
05:01You put someone's bra in the freezer
05:03so that they can't get it on in the morning.
05:05SHE LAUGHS
05:07You never done that?
05:08You wouldn't get my bra in the freezer.
05:10All you need to do is defrost your T-shirt enough to wear it.
05:14Under your armpit?
05:15Yeah, under your armpit.
05:17Yeah, on the hottest part of your body.
05:19How do you defrost a T-shirt?
05:21You could sit on it, you could put it up your top,
05:24you could lick it, you could breathe on it.
05:27SHE BREATHES HEAVILY
05:29BUZZER
05:30Good luck, guys!
05:31Here we go.
05:35Oh, my...
05:36What are they doing?
05:38God, she's going hell for leather, banging that T-shirt on the floor.
05:44People are smashing it on the floor.
05:46Dex is just jumping on it.
05:48Oh, God, is that a technique of defrosting?
05:50Because I've never done that with bread.
05:52This would be my technique.
05:54Sit on your knees like that.
05:56Get it in your arse cheeks.
05:58That's a good one.
06:00Friction.
06:02I mean, he's taking his trousers off.
06:04His tactic is doing what you can with what you have.
06:07What is he doing?
06:08Oh, my God, he's taken his pants off.
06:10Why?
06:11It's going to be quicker to do trousers down
06:13than to try and undo my shirt buttons because of my disability.
06:15We're very proud people, disabled people.
06:17If we can get our kit off.
06:19It's coming off.
06:21Melt it and let's get it on.
06:23And Kingsley is done!
06:25Right, Kingsley.
06:27I mean, good to hear.
06:28Oh, my God, what is he wearing? Jesus Christ.
06:30Good lad, I love the kegs.
06:34I mean, Les is taking it easy, he's just having a lie down.
06:37Look at that guy.
06:38Why is your top off?
06:39Please don't tell me he's just lying down on the T-shirt.
06:43Isn't it mad what people will do for money?
06:45Jesus Christ.
06:47I swear Dad's got the same pair of shoes as Les, innit?
06:51We've got two left.
06:53It's Les versus Bianca.
06:55Bianca's absolutely smashing it.
06:58Jesus Christ.
07:00We've got another face-off on our hands.
07:02Lead in!
07:03On Les! On Les!
07:04One of his arms is still frozen.
07:06And Bianca has done it.
07:08Oh, Bianca's done it!
07:10Les is gone.
07:13Belly fat helped, but I just weren't strong enough to break it apart.
07:18It looks like he's roaming the streets of Gran Canaria with his top like that.
07:22He probably should have taken his trousers off as well.
07:29Inca Philly.
07:30Oh, I thought I'd better pre-warn you too, shall I?
07:33You know, this tablet, I'm about to commence.
07:36Yeah.
07:37You got side effects, have you?
07:39No.
07:40Well, it has.
07:42It could increase my libido.
07:44Dave and his wife, Shirley.
07:46God, is that all that's on your mind?
07:48No, it's not.
07:49Yeah.
07:50But it could be.
07:52In the oncoming weeks.
07:54Well, 30 days to play it, God.
07:58You'll be worn out now.
08:00Oh, no.
08:01Have me.
08:02Don't worry, I won't.
08:04I'll book myself in a Premier Inn for a month.
08:08On Monday, a familiar old face was back looking for new tricks on Disney+.
08:13Ready for a bit of David Blaine, Jane?
08:19I get mixed up between David Blaine and David Copperfield.
08:22It's nice to see David Blaine back, to be fair.
08:24He'd done the ultimate vanishing act.
08:26He had, from the spotlight.
08:27Until now.
08:28I'm searching for performers who will teach me things that are daring...
08:32Ah.
08:33..and way out of my comfort zone.
08:35Oh, see, that ain't my one.
08:37What the heck?
08:38This is all the stuff that I do not like.
08:40This isn't magic.
08:41And that search has brought me to South-East Asia.
08:44He's searching South-East Asia for secret knowledge.
08:47A lot of people search themselves in South-East Asia, don't they?
08:50Gap year.
08:51On a moped.
08:52It's a David Blaine gap year, this.
08:58I love magic. I do, really.
09:00I know, I wish I could do magic, make you fucking disappear.
09:05I can crack my nose.
09:06No. No. No.
09:08Oh!
09:10That's quite impressive.
09:11That's not a magic trick.
09:13Stop doing it.
09:15In the programme, we saw David in a field with a man called Fitz.
09:21God, man, what is in that box?
09:25Oh, a snake!
09:31Wow!
09:33Fucking hell.
09:34Jesus Christ, it's like a hosepipe.
09:39This is a king cobra, Leila.
09:48Shit, man.
09:49Hey!
09:50Oh, my God, is he going to kiss it?
09:56Oh!
09:57Oh, no!
10:00I mean, what is the snake thinking, Le?
10:02How do I know what the fucking snake's thinking?
10:05I've kissed a parrot before.
10:07I'd rather a parrot bite me face than one of them.
10:09I kissed one in Turkey last year.
10:11Then I texted my dad saying, will I get bird flu?
10:15Wow.
10:16After a few months of training,
10:18it was time for David to come face-to-face with the king cobra.
10:22OK, move closer, slowly.
10:25What is he doing?
10:26I don't know. I don't see the point.
10:30Boom!
10:33If that strikes and he's too close, there's no saving him.
10:36Don't forget your leg.
10:40Yeah.
10:41Here we go.
10:42Shit, a brick, man.
10:46OK.
10:47Slowly.
10:48Oh, my God.
10:49Oh, my God.
10:50Oh, my God.
10:51Oh, my God.
10:52Slowly.
10:53Oh, my God.
10:54I mean, he's offering the plums up there.
10:56On a platter.
10:57Slowly.
11:01Oh, fuck me!
11:03I don't think it likes him.
11:05I don't think the fucking mates, do you?
11:07No.
11:08But he touched it.
11:09He touched it.
11:10He touched it.
11:13This is absolute madness.
11:15What about blowing it a case instead?
11:17Yeah, blow it a case.
11:19OK, let's see that.
11:23Four...
11:25Oh, it dripped it!
11:33Oh, he's on it, he's on it, like...
11:35No!
11:40HE SCREAMS
11:43Oh, he's pushing it down with...
11:45Oh, he's pushing it down.
11:46Bloody hell.
11:50God.
11:52He's done it, Rowan, he's done it.
11:54Look at that.
11:55That is cool, that.
11:57How many people can see you've necked on with a king cobra?
12:00I mean, few women, actually, probably.
12:02I mean, Lee, any animal, doesn't matter what it is, can turn on you.
12:06My Harvest cat did with you.
12:08Yeah.
12:09It flew and it went on your face.
12:11It, like, jumped from the top of the stairs.
12:13And it was a beautiful cat, that.
12:15To you, it was.
12:16But it just didn't get on with you.
12:18And it used to turn the tap on.
12:19It just went to you.
12:20It just went...
12:21HE SCREAMS
12:29In Leeds...
12:30I've been and met with Georgia, your PT, today.
12:33Yeah, how did it go?
12:34Turns out, I can plank for a minute.
12:37Amazing, well done.
12:39Apparently, you can only do 27 seconds and then collapse.
12:41..sisters Ellie and Izzy.
12:43It's not a competition for me.
12:45And so, do you know what she said as well?
12:47So, she were asking me, we were testing out the weights,
12:49and she was like, how does that feel, does that feel OK?
12:51And I was like, yeah, she went, oh, can we go a bit heavier?
12:53I was like, yeah, let's go a bit heavier then.
12:55She went, you don't do what Ellie does,
12:57and just pretends that it's actually too heavy,
12:59when really it's not, and she can manage it.
13:01She just doesn't want to go heavier.
13:04Listen, is there no PT and plumbing client confidentiality here?
13:08Why is she telling you all my secrets?
13:11On Monday night, it was a stateside security leak
13:14making the headlines on ITV.
13:17Do you watch news a bit like this now?
13:21It's not going to help, is it?
13:23An act of unbelievable incompetence has tonight given us
13:27an astonishing insight into the working of Donald Trump's White House.
13:31Everyone's incompetent today. Have you heard about this? Yes.
13:34And yet it does seem to be true that a journalist was given access
13:38to a highly classified and secure, supposedly, conversation
13:42at the heart of the Trump administration.
13:44Oh, fucking hell!
13:47You know, what's a little breach when it's national security?
13:50Nine days ago, the United States launched wide-ranging strikes
13:54on Houthi targets in Yemen.
13:56Oh, is that thing going on where they keep attacking American shipping
14:00that went through some canal?
14:02But now it's emerged the discussion to attack
14:05was conducted on the messaging app Signal.
14:08Oh, my fucking hell!
14:13Are they giving him military secrets? Information!
14:16Who organises stuff like this on a group chat?
14:19And breathtakingly, a journalist, Jeffrey Goldberg,
14:22from The Atlantic magazine, was inadvertently invited
14:25into the group by National Security Advisor Mike Waltz.
14:28He's advising them on security and he's done this?
14:33He begs belief.
14:35Well, he'll be waltzing down to the job centre with his P45.
14:39Jeffrey Goldberg, you jammy git.
14:42I don't know anything about it.
14:44Oh, bullshit.
14:46He knew nothing about it, but J.D. Vance, who seconded and commanded,
14:50cos he was in the chat. Exactly.
14:52I'm not a big fan of The Atlantic.
14:54To me, it's a magazine that's going out of business.
14:57So no-one's going to buy it. They fucking are now.
14:59It was going out of business until Lewis fell in his lap.
15:02Until you gave him that gem.
15:04At one point, Vice President J.D. Vance says,
15:07I just hate bailing Europe out again.
15:09Oh, my God.
15:11Jesus Christ, he's the right nubber, that J.D. Vance, isn't he?
15:14Defence Secretary Pete Hegseth later responded,
15:17I fully share your loathing of European freeloading.
15:20It's pathetic.
15:22Oh!
15:24If anyone doubted it, Mary,
15:26this is the end of the so-called special relationship.
15:29Well... This is Uncle Sam giving the UK the finger.
15:32I am definitely not going to Florida this year.
15:34They can fuck right off whether Mickey Mouse misses me or not.
15:37After the first wave of attacks, the group congratulates one another
15:41with National Security Advisor Mike Waltz.
15:43Is that how they talk to one another? Yeah.
15:45It's just a bunch of morons, isn't it?
15:47That's what it boils down to. Have no standards, really.
15:50Sending a fist-bump emoji along with a stars and stripes and a fire.
15:55I mean, this is killing people and he's putting a punch,
15:58flag, fire emoji.
16:00It's like teenagers at school. Yeah.
16:04It reminds me of something out of that film, Team America,
16:08which was all puppets. I haven't seen it.
16:10Yes, you saw a long film. I haven't.
16:12You watched it with me, Mary, at Craig's house. I didn't.
16:15It was about puppets. I was asleep.
16:17Oh, you were asleep.
16:21Well, Abs, I'm very, very sad to tell you.
16:27Oh, God, what?
16:28But we need to reschedule our night out we made for May.
16:31I'm glad you said that. Oh, why?
16:33Cos I need to reschedule as well.
16:37We've tried to plan this night out since, when, January?
16:40Yeah, January. It's now...
16:42March. March.
16:43We're heading into April. April's fully booged.
16:46We've already... We started the plan at the start of March.
16:50Yeah.
16:52Then we ended up a date, April.
16:54It's April. Then we changed.
16:56Then we've ended up with a date in May.
16:58Now we're changing again.
17:00Shall we just sack the night off and just booger for next year?
17:03We could just wait till Christmas time.
17:06We could just go out on Boxing Day.
17:11I think I'm busy.
17:12This week, Netflix brought us a powerful new drama
17:16that's had the whole world talking.
17:19I've been wanting to watch this.
17:22Stop clapping cos you'll spoil it for me.
17:24I've been wanting to watch it.
17:26This is incredible because Stephen Graham,
17:28you know that actor that always plays short Northerners?
17:31Yes.
17:32He has written it, co-written it.
17:39As a parent and as somebody who works in education,
17:42this is really must-watch TV.
17:48Here we are. What's up, mate?
17:50It's like a raid, isn't it?
17:52Someone's in trouble.
17:55Oh, my God!
17:56They're coming from all over.
17:59My God, they're armed!
18:01What have they got guns like that for?
18:03Well, they don't know what they're going in on, do they?
18:05You know what I mean?
18:06Police! Get down on the floor!
18:08They're not messing around, are they?
18:10Is it a drug trade?
18:12I've got children!
18:14Shit!
18:15Oh, Christ, how scary!
18:17I haven't done anything!
18:19You've got the wrong house, I'm telling you!
18:21You're making a big mistake!
18:22God, he's run past her dad.
18:24It's not him, then.
18:26Police! Suspect found! Show me your hands!
18:28Get your hands in the air!
18:29It's not the boy, is it?
18:31Hang on a minute! You can't do that to a kid!
18:34Jamie Miller, the time is 6.15am
18:38and I'm arresting you on suspicion of murder.
18:41Murder?
18:42Murder.
18:43How could a little chap like that have murdered anyone?
18:46Do you understand?
18:47Just tell him you understand, Jay!
18:48All right, I understand!
18:49OK, good. Get on slowly, please.
18:51God, they've still got a gun on him!
18:53Was there any need for all that lot to go into that house, though,
18:55if they knew there was going for a child?
18:57Why do you need guns for a 13-year-old? He's 13!
19:00A 13, Jenny, see?
19:02Yeah, but, Lee, that's not nowadays.
19:05I just remember being 13, I know, so long ago.
19:08But I just remember, like, all you do is, like, play Fortnite.
19:11That's what I did when I was 13.
19:13Good. I'm glad that's all you do when you were 13.
19:16We were moaning about them playing Closer Fortnite on balance.
19:19There's no way he's done this.
19:21Look, he's had guns in his face and everything.
19:23I hope you're happy with yourselves.
19:25Dad!
19:26Oh, the neighbours are all out.
19:28Oh, my God, you'd be absolutely mortified.
19:30I would be at that window, I'm not going to lie.
19:32As a matter of fact, I'd be at the gate.
19:34Let's go.
19:38Come on.
19:39Dad!
19:40Aw.
19:41Dad!
19:42You are in him.
19:44He's a suspected murderer, Mum.
19:46I know, but he's still a child.
19:48If your son were under suspicion of something that serious,
19:52surely you'd have some...
19:54..idea.
19:56A bit later, we saw Jamie ready to be interviewed by the police.
20:00I'm going to ask you about...
20:03..romantic relationships.
20:05How old's this kid? 13.
20:07Romantic relationships?
20:09Sexual relationships.
20:10Oh, this is horrible, man.
20:12I noticed on your Instagram that you reposted a picture of this model.
20:17What's her name, Jamie?
20:18Instagram at 13.
20:20Well, 13-year-olds are allowed Instagram and TikTok.
20:23That is the age.
20:25Below this one, the more recent one,
20:28you can see there's a series of comments...
20:32..and innuendos, which seem pretty aggressive.
20:35Oh, dear. Aggressive language towards women.
20:38At 13.
20:39That can mean only one thing, Mary.
20:41What? It's come under the influence of...
20:43Andrew Tate.
20:44They're from you.
20:45Now, how do you feel about women, Jamie?
20:47What is what? I'm asking a kid that.
20:50Do you have a girlfriend?
20:52No.
20:53If you did, would you want her to look like any of these women?
20:55What are you saying that for?
20:57Jamie, do you know a girl called Katie Leonard?
21:00OK, who's Katie now?
21:02Is she the victim, do you think? I don't know.
21:04She's not in your reg group, is she?
21:06But you do share some classes together, that's right, innit?
21:10English. English?
21:12Top set English.
21:14So he's not a deaf lad, is he? No.
21:17Is she who's dead, then?
21:19Is she who's dead, then?
21:20How do you know that?
21:21No emotion. No.
21:23I think his father's starting to question him now.
21:25I think his father looks a bit worried.
21:27He's looking at him all the time.
21:29Is she?
21:30Oh, yeah.
21:31She is.
21:32Oh! Oh, it's... Oh.
21:34She is?
21:35Her body was found at Crothers car park just past 10.30pm.
21:39Oh, my God.
21:40Where were you at that time?
21:43I don't know.
21:44What have they got on him?
21:45They must have something on him to have him like this.
21:48Do you know how many times she was stabbed, Jamie?
21:51Oh, my God.
21:53No.
21:54Seven times.
21:55HE GASPS
21:56Oh, it's the friends who did that, then.
21:58A kid couldn't do that, man.
21:59Jamie, we've been looking through CCTV images
22:02of you and Katie from last night.
22:04OK?
22:05Oh!
22:07Got him on CCTV?
22:08Yeah, so they know that they were together.
22:11Why were you following her, Jamie?
22:13What?
22:14HE GASPS
22:15Oh, my God.
22:16What was he followed her for?
22:18She's walking past a crossing at Fourbridge Street at 9.46pm.
22:21Look, his head's gone down.
22:23He doesn't know what to do.
22:24And at 9.47pm, same place, walking in the same direction,
22:28is you, Jamie.
22:30Oh, Jamie, Jamie, Jamie.
22:32There he is, look.
22:34So he was following her.
22:35Well, it's been an old pack of lies, hasn't it?
22:38Yeah.
22:39I'm now going to play you some footage.
22:41Oh, no!
22:43What the hell is this?
22:49Let's have a look, then.
22:55You can see them chatting to each other.
22:57Yeah, arguing.
23:00Oh, they're fighting.
23:01Oh, she's pushed him down.
23:02Oh, shit!
23:05Oh, God!
23:06He's knocked her down.
23:07What's he doing?
23:08Oh!
23:09Oh, my God.
23:14Oh, no.
23:15He's stabbing her.
23:16Oh, no.
23:17He's stabbing her.
23:18She's arm going up like that.
23:20Oh, shit a brick.
23:23I think that's enough, OK?
23:25Oh, look at his dad.
23:27I mean, I think Dad's gone from his little boy
23:31to, who the hell's sitting next to me?
23:34I'm terminating this interview at 7.12am.
23:38Let's go.
23:40What on earth have I just watched?
23:42Oh, my God, Daniela.
23:44I stopped breathing, then.
23:46Oh, my heart's absolutely hammering.
23:48I can't believe it.
23:55Oh!
23:56Oh!
23:57Oh!
23:58Oh!
23:59Oh!
24:00Oh!
24:01Oh!
24:02Oh!
24:03Oh!
24:04Oh!
24:05Oh!
24:06Oh!
24:07Oh!
24:09Oh!
24:10Oh, he's recoiled from his son.
24:12You can't do that.
24:13No.
24:14No matter what your kid's done.
24:20Oh, look.
24:21Oh, God.
24:29That makes me upset, that does.
24:32Watching this just frightens me to death,
24:35the fact that Bobby isn't far off 13
24:38and this is what happens with 13-year-olds.
24:42Like, I just want to wrap him in cotton wool
24:44and I don't want him to ever go out into the big, bad world.
24:47The biggest issue is, and the biggest focus is,
24:49that there's, like, the internet is raising the youth now
24:52and there are some vile characters.
24:54You hear about this kind of, this manosphere
24:57and, like, toxic masculinity,
24:59and boys not having kind of, like, role models.
25:02Yeah.
25:03So they turn to some really vile people
25:06who sell something to them that just isn't true.
25:09Yeah.
25:10I mean, nowadays, you give a child an iPad now, don't you,
25:13to keep them fit?
25:14Yeah.
25:15I used to play with my waddle when I was little.
25:17It's all I had to play with, my waddle.
25:19Yeah.
25:20Look how you turned out, darling.
25:22LAUGHTER
25:25In Blackpool...
25:26I had a nightmare in a three-wheel van yesterday.
25:29Well, I'd stalled at the traffic lights.
25:31Amazing.
25:32But the battery's flat on it.
25:34Pete and his little sister, Sophie.
25:37And some absolute knob in a convertible went,
25:41you can't park your pencil sharpener there.
25:44And I was like, what?
25:45And I was like, what?
25:46And I was like, what?
25:47And I was like, what?
25:48And I was like, what?
25:49And I was like, what?
25:50And I was like, what?
25:51And I was like, what?
25:52And I was like, what?
25:53And I was like, what?
25:54And I was like, what?
25:55And I was like, what?
25:56And I was like, what?
25:57And I was like, what?
25:58And I was like, what?
25:59And I was like, what?
26:00And I was like, what?
26:01And I was like, what?
26:02And I was like, what?
26:03And I was like, what?
26:04And I was like, what?
26:05And I was like, what?
26:06And I was like, what?
26:07And I was like, what?
26:08And I was like, what?
26:09And I was like, what?
26:10And I was like, what?
26:11And I was like, what?
26:12And I was like, what?
26:13And I was like, what?
26:14And I was like, what?
26:15And I was like, what?
26:16And I was like, what?
26:17I remember once, I was trying to body pop.
26:21And I put my neck out for a fortnight.
26:22It killed me.
26:23I had pain in my neck for a fortnight.
26:27Body popping.
26:28Hello, my darling.
26:29What's your name and where you come from?
26:33I am Red Panda, originally from China.
26:35Is that her actual name, Red Panda?
26:38Probably.
26:39Oh, it's not another singer?
26:40No.
26:41She don't look like a singer.
26:42She does.
26:43And what made you decide to audition for Britain's Got Talent?
26:47I love British culture.
26:49Really?
26:50That's what I thought.
26:51Really?
26:52What is British culture?
26:53Fish and chips, beans and toast and Greggs.
26:54Yeah, I agree with the Greggs.
26:55And what kind of performance are you going to give us?
26:56I will be performing acrobatic.
26:57Oh, acrobatic.
26:58She's knocking on a bit, isn't she?
26:59Acrobatics.
27:00My favorite of the batics, Pedro.
27:01Yes.
27:02Oh, my God.
27:03Oh, my God.
27:04Oh, my God.
27:05Oh, my God.
27:06Oh, my God.
27:07Oh, my God.
27:08Oh, my God.
27:09Oh, my God.
27:10Oh, my God.
27:11Oh, my God.
27:12Oh, my God.
27:13Oh, my God.
27:14Oh, my God.
27:15Oh, my God.
27:17I'm impressed already.
27:18That is literally like, oh, mum, isn't it?
27:19Just anything in a heel.
27:20She needs balls, quickly.
27:21Now, now.
27:22I know.
27:23What's that going on for?
27:24Anne's got balls, one.
27:25She's putting them on the red block.
27:26I'm just going to use them as a hat, I think.
27:27What's she doing?
27:28Oh, my God.
27:29Oh, my God.
27:30Oh, my God.
27:31Oh, my God.
27:32Oh, my God.
27:33Oh, my God.
27:34Oh, my God.
27:35Oh, my God.
27:36Oh, my God.
27:37Oh, my God.
27:38Oh, my God.
27:39Oh, my God.
27:40Oh, my God.
27:41Oh, my God.
27:42Oh, my God.
27:43Oh, my God.
27:44Oh, my God.
27:46What's she doing?
27:47There's a ball on her foot.
27:52That's not much of a talent, is it?
27:53Putting pots on your foot.
27:54It is riding a unicycle with one leg while you've got the pots on your foot.
28:01Oh!
28:02No.
28:03Wow.
28:07No.
28:08Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
28:12Oh!
28:13Freaking brilliant.
28:14OK.
28:15That's quite cool.
28:16That is really cool.
28:17Hear you?
28:18Josh can't even stack the plates when he's put them in the cupboard.
28:20Never mind on a unicycle, chuck them on your head.
28:24Oh, no.
28:25He's gone to give her more.
28:32Five.
28:33Five balls.
28:34Oh, no way.
28:35Shit.
28:36She's going to get them.
28:37Oh, that's too much, that.
28:38That's too much for her.
28:39It won't.
28:41She's got...
28:42Do you see how she's got all momentum?
28:44She's like...
28:45Like, how is it possible to do it with one leg?
28:50It's up to the knee.
28:51She's up to the knee with balls.
28:55That's it.
28:56Oh!
29:01No!
29:03Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
29:04It blew!
29:05What?
29:08No!
29:09Give over.
29:11Go on, Red Panda.
29:12What a girl.
29:13You are a legend.
29:14Oh, that's extraordinary, Mary.
29:15No, you've done enough now.
29:16Just get off the stage.
29:17Hey, he caught them as well.
29:18Do you know what?
29:19I slag this programme off quite a lot, don't I?
29:20But that was a gem.
29:21But she can now set a dinner table quick, don't you?
29:22Yeah.
29:23When she does that, how is she not falling back?
29:24I don't understand.
29:25How can you...
29:26Oh, my God.
29:27Oh, my God.
29:28Oh, my God.
29:29Oh, my God.
29:30Oh, my God.
29:31Oh, my God.
29:32Oh, my God.
29:33Oh, my God.
29:34Oh, my God.
29:35Oh, my God.
29:36Oh, my God.
29:37Oh, my God.
29:38Oh, my God.
29:39I don't understand.
29:40How can you...
29:41Well, you'd have to keep your spine straight.
29:43Like...
29:44You can't...
29:45You can't put your back...
29:46Your leg doesn't even go that far.
29:47Wait.
29:48I know, I wouldn't be able to do it.
29:57In Wiltshire...
30:01Did you eat eggs today?
30:02My preferred option for a slimming breakfast is a boiled egg with your bread, Mary.
30:09That I've made.
30:10Giles and his wife, Mary.
30:12Do you know how many minutes I give it now?
30:14How?
30:15Four and a half, five and a half, six and a half, seven minutes.
30:20So seven minutes gets...
30:22From boiling?
30:23Gets me...
30:24Yeah, put it into boiling water and seven minutes still gets me a spilly yolk.
30:30Oh, don't say that.
30:31A spilly yolk, that's what my sister and I, we have to get spilly.
30:35It's got spilly, but we can't have soft, snotty egg.
30:39Oh, disgusting.
30:40On Wednesday night, Britain's most boisterous builder was back on Channel 4.
30:47Super homes.
30:49Super homes.
30:50They're bound to be...
30:51Oh, no.
30:52Stop it.
30:53Oh, that's the sibilance come back, Mary.
30:54I say I was very lucky for where I live, and to my parents, though.
30:58Oh, isn't that lovely?
31:02When it comes to building luxurious super homes...
31:05Blimey.
31:06Oh, look at that lovely house.
31:08What?
31:09..few have the experience of Maverick property developer Guy Phoenix.
31:14Look at me, I'm Guy.
31:15Guy Phoenix, he's an acquired taste.
31:16He's an interesting bloke.
31:20Who's been pushing the boundaries of opulence for over 20 years.
31:23I feel like there's a fine line between opulence and chavvy.
31:27Yeah.
31:28If I had two days to get from one end of the house to the other,
31:31wouldn't it?
31:32I'd have to have skates.
31:33More extravagant chandeliers the length of a double-decker bus.
31:37Chandelier?
31:38It's not even a chandelier.
31:39If I had a chandelier at my house, I'd call it a chandelier.
31:43I am the Bentley Ferrari of house building.
31:47I feel like Guy drives a Range Rover in the outside lane at 95,
31:50flashing everybody to get out of the way, cos he's impulsive.
31:53Building Britain's super homes.
31:55Who would want one of these houses?
31:57Put your hand up.
31:58These sort of houses are the ones I'd actually use
32:00my mobility scooter indoors as well.
32:02Definitely.
32:03I'd have to.
32:04Look at this, look at this.
32:06What are we looking at?
32:07Oh, he's found his next project, Tracer.
32:09He's got a top knot in, he means business.
32:11I need you to go round there now, I mean now,
32:15knock on the door, offer the lady what she wants for the house,
32:19shake hands with her and take it off the market.
32:22Really?
32:23Oh, he's minted, isn't he?
32:24He's determined.
32:25You see, if he turned up on my doorstep with his man bun
32:28and his sunglasses on his head, I'd be really worried.
32:32Yeah.
32:33I'd say, I don't want my path tarmac-ing.
32:35Yeah.
32:38The address says it's here.
32:39I reckon it's this.
32:42Look at those lovely mature trees,
32:44and that's exactly what would appeal to me, Mary,
32:47the evergreen trees, that's the thing.
32:49We'll chop all this shit down.
32:52Hi, Richard, my name's Guy Phoenix, I'm a developer.
32:55I'm at one of your properties.
32:57Yeah.
32:58I just thought I'd have a drive by to have a look at it,
33:00and I like it.
33:01What Guy's actually doing at the moment is trespassing.
33:03Yes!
33:04What I'm saying is I'd be prepared to buy the house
33:08for the asking price now.
33:10OK.
33:11I've had two offers from two developers
33:13who've said exactly the same thing to me.
33:15Oh, oh, that's not what he wants to hear, Mary.
33:18Competition already.
33:19Yeah, but none of them are cooler than Guy Phoenix.
33:21One of those offers is currently starting with a six.
33:23Oh, really? Oh, dear!
33:25Oh, that puts a spanner in the works, doesn't it, Guy?
33:28He's going to have to go above, isn't he?
33:30He is.
33:31Despite the setback, Guy's spirits are high.
33:34I am having that house.
33:37Oh, my God!
33:38Guy looking at this house is like me when I go Greggs
33:41and I'm looking through the glass
33:43and just being like, I'll have that one.
33:46Having got the house, Guy was all giddy
33:48as he showed his family his latest purchase.
33:51Shall we go inside and have a look?
33:53But as the house keys have gone missing...
33:55No!
33:56No, you are not.
33:57What? He's actually going to break in?
34:02Oh, my God!
34:04He's had his offer accepted.
34:06I don't know if he's exchanged or completed yet.
34:09Welcome to my abode.
34:11Ooh.
34:13He didn't tell me there was an alarm.
34:15Oh, I set the bloody alarm off now.
34:18Oh, anyway, let's have a quick look round.
34:20Look at this.
34:21Oh, I like the curtains.
34:23They're nice, aren't they?
34:25With the alarm still blaring,
34:27Guy is hoping the ex-owner left the code lying around.
34:30Really?
34:31Yeah, let's have a guess, shall we?
34:33Guessing the code?
34:37Oh.
34:38Has he done it?
34:39Zero, zero, zero, zero!
34:41Oh, my God!
34:43Zero, zero, zero, zero!
34:45Oh, really?
34:47Outrageous!
34:49The thing with Guy, if I really wanted it,
34:51he's the type of person that I would keep increasing by 5p
34:54just to piss him off.
34:56He's...
35:00..upset me.
35:025p?
35:03Well, in context...
35:13In Durham...
35:14How big does Ralphie look this week?
35:16I mean, he's huge.
35:18Look at him.
35:19Hugh, how big is your little brother?
35:22Is he a big boy?
35:23Yeah.
35:24..best friends Abi and Georgia.
35:26Do you love him, Hugh?
35:28Yeah.
35:29Aw, he's your little brother, isn't he?
35:31Are you going to give him a little kiss, Hugh?
35:33Can you kiss him on the head?
35:34Hello!
35:35Aw, you give mini kisses instead?
35:37Hello!
35:38Hiya!
35:39He's very alert today.
35:41His lovely blue eyes.
35:43He is, he's massive.
35:44He's actually nearly the same height as Hugh, I would say.
35:47Was Hugh this size when Hugh was this old?
35:49No, Hugh was really fat.
35:51Have you heard that, Hugh?
35:53He was, he was a big, like, fat baby.
35:55Were you a little fatty?
35:57On Tuesday night, there was more Mancunian melodrama on ITV1.
36:02We've got to catch up on Coronation Street cos
36:05we didn't watch it for a week, did we?
36:07No, we didn't.
36:08Didn't even turn the telly on.
36:10Didn't miss it, either.
36:12No.
36:17Rob has given a kidney to his sister Carla
36:20so that he can use that as sort of like a cover
36:24so that he can break out of prison.
36:26Right.
36:27However, the kidney wound has got infected.
36:30I'd give you a kidney if it meant I could get out of prison.
36:34That's really warmed the cockles of my heart.
36:36In the episode,
36:37we saw a worse-for-wear Rob at Ken Barlow's house
36:40holding his ex, Tracy, and sister Carla hostage.
36:44Spaghetti hoops on toast.
36:47I bet it's been a while, eh?
36:49All this drama's happening over spaghetti hoops on toast.
36:52But why have you ordered spaghetti hoops for Carla?
36:54I haven't got a clue, love.
36:56You get the idea, don't you?
36:59What idea?
37:01Last supper.
37:02Last supper?
37:03Oh!
37:04Is it a last supper?
37:06I'd want more than spaghetti hoops, wouldn't you?
37:09Do you want a three-course meal?
37:11Cos I'm dying.
37:12And you...
37:14..you are going to be my witness.
37:16You are going to be my witness to my death?
37:19So she's got to watch her brother die?
37:21Yeah.
37:22Whilst eating spaghetti hoops?
37:24Yeah.
37:25OK.
37:28Oh, you'd be struggling, Cheryl.
37:30I know, that's what I mean.
37:32I couldn't eat them.
37:33You wouldn't be able to swallow them?
37:35I'd let him shoot me.
37:40Oh, they're planning.
37:41They're collaborating.
37:42Sign language.
37:44They are doing sign language, aren't they?
37:52Oh, for fuck's sake!
37:53You always get somebody knocking on the door
37:55as you're about to doze off, don't you?
37:57You always get someone knocking on the door
37:59and you're about to sneak off
38:00and there's a guy with a gun
38:01that's dying in your living room
38:02and you find the sleeper and you're trying to get out.
38:07Oh, no, not Lisa.
38:09This could be trouble.
38:10You just like this storyline
38:11cos you think that Lisa and Carla are hot.
38:13They are, I know.
38:14It's nice having a same-sex couple in the programme.
38:16It's lovely.
38:17Yeah.
38:20Are you all right, Rob?
38:21Are you all right, Rob?
38:23There used to be some...
38:26I'm sure it was cocodamol or something in the buttons.
38:29No, they're doing a plan.
38:32Oh, she's got the key, Ron.
38:34To the back door.
38:35Oh, the back door key.
38:36Yes, it was a little too late
38:38and I used to hide it from you under my bed.
38:40Oh, Tracey's out!
38:42Tracey's out!
38:43Oh, my God!
38:44In case you need her.
38:45Go on, Tracey!
38:46Go on, Tracey!
38:48Go on, Tracey!
38:51Hello, the authorities.
38:53Tracey!
38:55It's Rob.
38:56He's got Carla.
38:57He's got Lisa.
38:59He's got Carla.
39:00He's got a gun.
39:01Oh, Lisa knows now.
39:03Stay there.
39:04Just stay there.
39:05Lisa's going in.
39:06I'm police.
39:07Stand back.
39:08I'm police.
39:09I'm going in.
39:10You don't deserve freedom!
39:12Oh, no!
39:13Oh, no!
39:14Killing a hostage would add years.
39:17Look at the fucking state of me.
39:18Do you think I'm going to last until tea time?
39:20Yeah, I've got minutes to live.
39:22Where's the rest of me?
39:23Oh, do you know, I'll be...
39:25Boom!
39:26Yes, girl!
39:27Come on, Lisa!
39:29Oh!
39:31Oh, yes!
39:32Good girl, Lisa!
39:33I told you she was hot, didn't I?
39:36But I don't think that you're going to want to shoot your brother-in-law
39:39in front of your bird.
39:41No!
39:42Oh, no!
39:43No!
39:44Oh!
39:45The gun's gone off.
39:46Who's been shot?
39:47I don't have a good feeling about this.
39:51Here we go.
39:52Fucking hell, are you just joking?
39:53Sorry.
39:55Put the weapon down!
39:56Put the weapon down!
39:57I mean, who's been shot?
39:58Has anyone got shot?
39:59I think the gun just went off.
40:00What, in the air?
40:03Judge!
40:04We've got a casualty.
40:05They've got a casualty?
40:06They've got a casualty.
40:07What?
40:08Who's got shot, then?
40:13What, the blazes?
40:14Oh.
40:15It went out the window?
40:16Or was outside?
40:17No.
40:18Oh, Betsy!
40:19Oh, it's her daughter!
40:21Oh, Betsy!
40:22It's the bird!
40:23That's her daughter!
40:24Well, that was a bit of excitement, wasn't it?
40:27That was.
40:28Yeah.
40:29Blimey.
40:30Do you know what?
40:31Every time I watch Coronation Street,
40:33it always puts a smile on my face.
40:35I know.
40:36I'm glad that they've sort of moved over
40:38to the comedy side of things now.
40:40Oh, no, I don't think that's meant to be funny.
40:42Comedy.
40:47In Wiltshire,
40:48there's a man who's been shot.
40:50In Wiltshire,
40:51I'm feeling slightly disheartened, Giles.
40:54Oh.
40:55I got up at 7.07.
40:57By 12.30, I'd finished cleaning.
41:00Oh, I'm sorry.
41:02Giles and his wife, Mary.
41:04All I'm saying, Giles, is that I got up at 7.07
41:07and I cleaned continuously for five hours, 23 minutes.
41:11Well, I would have noticed it if you hadn't done it, Mary.
41:14Exactly.
41:15The blizzards put it that way.
41:16There's behind every grain of bread,
41:18there's behind every great man,
41:20there's a woman cleaning.
41:24On Saturday night,
41:25the best in musical theatre
41:27were belting out some big numbers on BBC One.
41:30Oh, I do like a good sing-song, Trace.
41:32We could join in.
41:34We like going to choir, don't we?
41:35We do, and I love a musical.
41:37My favourite musical is Blood Brothers.
41:41You hadn't seen Blood Brothers,
41:42you took me to see Blood Brothers.
41:44Considering Billy Elliot was the one I was in,
41:46you're supposed to say Billy Elliot.
41:48Oh.
41:49Billy Elliot's my favourite,
41:51especially the one with Sean in.
41:56Yes!
41:57Ta-da-da!
41:58Bring it on, bring it on!
42:00This is my worst nightmare.
42:02Hello, everyone, Vicky here.
42:04In the show, we saw actress Vicky McClure
42:07telling her Dementia Choir
42:08about a special performance in store for them.
42:11You will be joining somebody on the stage,
42:13a massive name within the theatre,
42:15within the music world.
42:17Who's big in a theatre?
42:18I don't do theatres.
42:19Who's big in a theatre?
42:20Is that Shane Ward?
42:21Oh, I hope it's Michael Ball.
42:22If it's Michael Ball, we're on to a winner.
42:24None other than Michael Ball.
42:26Ah!
42:27Michael Ball!
42:28Yeah!
42:29Yay!
42:30It's Michael Ball!
42:31Oh, Nana would be.
42:32Your fan.
42:33She'd be over the moon.
42:34She'd be fuming.
42:35She'd wish she'd got Alzheimer's.
42:36She'd fake it, yeah.
42:38She'd fake it.
42:39APPLAUSE
42:44You loved this song, didn't you, love?
42:46Oh, did...
42:47He just gets me every time.
42:49Oh, Ronnie, I think we need to get the tissues out for this one.
42:54To dream
42:57The impossible dream
42:59Oh, the impossible...
43:01Oh, God.
43:02Oh, it makes me cry.
43:03Haven't fucking started yet.
43:04To bear
43:07With unbearable sorrow
43:10And he's not a bad old singer, is he?
43:12No.
43:13Let's be fair.
43:14I wish I could sing, you know.
43:15I'm glad you can.
43:16From afar
43:19To try
43:22When your arms are too weary
43:26They'll all know the words to this.
43:28Do you know the words?
43:29They're not getting to sing, though.
43:31Michael's hogging the limelight.
43:33Give him a chance.
43:35He's not even turned the big bloody light on for them.
43:38No matter how hopeless
43:41No matter how far
43:44Remember, it's Michael Ball and the Dementia Choir, Michael.
43:47Yeah, Michael.
43:48When I'm laid to my rest
43:52Oh, here they come.
43:54Here we are.
43:55Look, the lights are up.
43:56They're on now, Lee.
43:57Come on.
43:58And the world
44:01Will be better for this
44:04Oh, stop it right now.
44:06That one man
44:09Scorned and covered with scars
44:14Still strove
44:17With his last dance of courage
44:20Do you know what?
44:21Music just reduces me to tears at its best.
44:24And it's so emotive.
44:26But when you're watching it in this format...
44:28Alice.
44:29It's even more so.
44:31To reach the unreachable
44:36There's both people left, isn't there?
44:37It's lucky your mum's crying here.
44:40Imagine that.
44:41It's made me want to cry.
44:43Imagine if that were your nan or grandad.
44:46You'd be so proud.
44:47Oh, you would.
44:48Scorned
44:55Scorned
44:59That's a very special moment, isn't it?
45:00It is.
45:01It's a big thing for them, you know.
45:02It's a massive deal.
45:03The impossible dream
45:09And if I will reach
45:14The unreachable
45:19Soul
45:30You know what?
45:31I'm going to go as far to say that was fucking brilliant.
45:34It was.
45:35Could I do some with a bit less Michael for me?
45:37Yeah!
45:38Yeah, can we have a bit less ball next time?
45:41If we did a musical, the thing would be...
45:44It would start with...
45:46Life in the Grottage.
45:48Yeah.
45:49Then I would make up a song saying, like, something like...
45:52Work, work, work
45:54All I do is work
45:55While you're watching YouTube
46:00All day
46:02And then you'd sing something back.
46:04I've got to plant my onions
46:06That's my day sorted
46:08OK, we'll sing a song along those lines.
46:11I've got to plant my onions
46:14It's going to take the whole day long
46:18And then I'd say
46:20Meanwhile I'm cleaning up messes that you've left
46:25And that's the end.
46:26Yeah.
46:27I've got to plant my onions
46:30It's going to take the whole day long
46:32And then I'd say
46:34Meanwhile I'm cleaning up messes that you've left
46:38And that's the end.
46:40Yeah.
46:41I've got to plant my onions
46:43It's going to take the whole day long
46:46And then I'd say
46:48Meanwhile I'm cleaning up messes that you've left
46:52And that's the end.
46:54Yeah.
46:55Yeah.