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Lucio Buffalmano is a sociologist and a world expert on power dynamics, strategies, and men's self-development.
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Today, it’s the world's most popular website on power and strategies.
https://thepowermoves.com/
Lucio Buffalmano is a sociologist and a world expert on power dynamics, strategies, and men's self-development.
In 2016, Lucio founded ThePowerMoves.com to help good men empower themselves, achieve their goals, and win at life.
Today, it’s the world's most popular website on power and strategies.
https://thepowermoves.com/
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LearningTranscript
00:00Why do Arabs always seem to be using money for dating, while in the West men are more
00:06interested in learning game and often are better at gaming?
00:11In this video we will explain exactly why.
00:15First of all, obviously it's a generalization, however, anybody who has lived on this earth
00:21long enough has noticed a pattern where Arab men tend to show off their money.
00:27For example, where I live in this city, every time there is somebody revving a Lamborghini
00:32or a Ferrari, not always, 80% of the times though, it's an Arab guy or Arab descent.
00:40Anyway, they're just some random trivia for fun.
00:45But let's understand why that applies so often, why that is the case.
00:51Let's start with the background.
00:53Men on average have the problem of paternity, such as in the human race men can never be
01:00sure that the children are their children.
01:04So that creates a problem because if they keep investing in the woman, in the family,
01:10in the children and it's not theirs, they wasted all the resources and genetic future.
01:16So to solve this problem, purely from an amoral, inter-gender power dynamics point
01:23of view, Muslim-slash-Arab societies have been more successful at ensuring paternity
01:29with the repression of women's sexuality.
01:32We can call these societies conservative, puritan or repressive, to be honest, in my
01:38opinion would also be very befitting.
01:41So now this has a whole host of consequences.
01:45First of all, in a highly conservative society, sexually conservative, most sex does not happen
01:52in the short term.
01:53Most sex happens in the long term, such as long term relationships, committed relationships.
02:00Very little to no sex in the short term.
02:03So with long term committed relationships there is in general less sex in general.
02:08Women have fewer sexual partners.
02:11Women have less experience in sex.
02:14Women also are less interested in sex or they pretend not to be because people talk
02:20about sex less in general.
02:22It's more of a taboo topic.
02:24And also the legal framework eschews this type of repression.
02:29In a society where women get stoned to death for sleeping with a man who's not their official
02:35partner, you understand there's a strong incentive to not cheat, right?
02:41So there is a whole package of things from the culture, from not talking about sex, from
02:47talking about and from talking up faithfulness as a virtue to a legal framework that strongly
02:53punishes women, then it's safer for men there to invest in their children because they can
02:59be safer about paternity.
03:02However, now this changes completely the dynamic in dating.
03:09In general, money is more important for long term than short term.
03:13Why?
03:14Because long term money serves to support the family, to support the children, to ensure
03:19that the children can grow healthy, strong and then they have enough money in the future
03:24to then attract another partner themselves.
03:27In the short term, look, money still matters and it can be very helpful.
03:32However, it matters less.
03:34Short term is more about making the woman feel good, being charismatic, being attractive.
03:39Sometimes it's just about the two of them being horny.
03:42It's a whole host of things.
03:44Short term is also about romance, it's about feelings, making her feel good.
03:49It's about game techniques.
03:51You must approach, you must move your ass, you must carry the conversation forward in
03:56the beginning until she hooks, say the pickup artists.
04:00You must handle cock blocks.
04:02Sometimes you must handle last minute resistances.
04:05This is all about game.
04:06It's not so much about money.
04:07It's about game.
04:08It's about charisma.
04:11Sometimes it's about faking things, just, you know, giving her a dream, a fantasy.
04:16That's also seduction.
04:19So in by short term, money can still be helpful.
04:22For example, you can walk into a club, throw money around, get a VIP table, invite women
04:27there.
04:28This is also called conspicuous consumption.
04:31Super helpful.
04:32However, in general, money matters more long term and long term, you also need less game.
04:38Why?
04:39Because long term is more about compatibility.
04:42If you want to stay forever, well forever, as long as we live, which is not forever,
04:48then compatibility matters more than game.
04:50You know, you can just sit over 10 dates.
04:53One, it's harder to pretend to be something you're not.
04:57And two, it's also better for you to be yourself so you can ensure that you can get along well
05:01with your partner.
05:03So on average, long term, money matters more, game matters less.
05:08This is why in our society men do not learn games so much.
05:13One because it's not as helpful and two because in a way they don't need to.
05:18It's like the American people who don't need to learn another language because everybody
05:22speaks English.
05:23It would be useless for them.
05:25In the same vein, learning game in an Arab society, yeah, it can add a little bit of
05:30value but not as much as focusing on making money and showing off money.
05:35On the other hand, in libertine society, sex tends to happen more in the short term, uncommitted
05:41and, of course, this is me just estimating.
05:44Probably most of the sex still happens in committed relationships or in serious long
05:48term relationships.
05:49However, there is a lot more sex in the short term.
05:53Short term to long term range from the most short term will probably be a one night stand.
05:59You don't even know your partner's name.
06:01She doesn't know yours.
06:03You don't see each other anymore.
06:05All types of situationships and then the most long term will be long monogamous marriage.
06:11However, since here there is a lot more of short term dating, guys are interested in
06:17learning game.
06:18Learning game is helpful.
06:20But again, it's the whole culture that shifts.
06:22Even women in the West who are looking for long term, they still appreciate a guy who's
06:27charismatic, who's got game, who's smart, who's got frame control, who makes them feel
06:33more less than the man is so she can look up to him.
06:39So game in the West matters a lot more in the short term, but it also matters more in
06:45the long term.
06:46And comparatively here, money matters less.
06:49Also in the West, most countries, they have a strong safety net.
06:53So it means that money matters less because even if a woman gets knocked up and she doesn't
06:59have a partner, the state supports her.
07:02So in these countries, when the guy shows off with the Ferrari, yes, it always helps.
07:08Of course, who doesn't like money and the Ferrari?
07:11They're beautiful, of course.
07:13But it matters comparatively less.
07:16And there is a large chunk of the population who thinks that making up for some other luck
07:23that you don't have.
07:24I had a girlfriend skewing left wing.
07:28Every time somebody had a cool car, she said, oh, small penises.
07:32So that's also another reason why in the West guys tend to shy away from throwing money
07:38around too much, because it may also cost in other ways.
07:41It's always better when you have the opportunity to first display your personal qualities.
07:48And then if you also have money, it's an added bonus.
07:51But never, never start with the money first.
07:55Many guys in the West get it.
07:56And that's why, on average, we see Arab societies where money matters more and Arab men who
08:03throw money around and Western society that is more about game.
08:08Now, interesting things here also happen, because what's interesting is that, yes, these
08:14guys have been successful in repressing women.
08:18Something I completely disagree with, by the way, learn game, learn to be a cool guy and
08:22enjoy women's sexuality instead of repressing it.
08:25But that's a parenthesis.
08:27What's interesting is that the successful guys in this society, they still have the
08:31same mental psychology, mental psyche, mental programming of every man.
08:37So they still enjoy more sex, more sexual partners.
08:41But they find themselves in a society where it's harder to get short term sex, if not
08:46outright close to impossible.
08:48It's never impossible, of course, but it's much harder.
08:51So you see a lot of these men who then move to the West, but without the game, they rely
08:58on throwing money around.
09:01Or sometimes they call women in Dubai and throw money at them so they can have sex with
09:07these Western women.
09:09And then what's also interesting is that often these guys are born in this culture where
09:13they look down on libertine, sexually liberated women, they despise them while they still
09:19want the sex.
09:21So that becomes a little bit toxic.
09:23So these guys struggle to attract Western women because of this inner strong Madonna
09:29whore dichotomy.
09:31Almost everybody, almost every man has a Madonna whore dichotomy within him.
09:36However, it's much stronger when you grew up believing in this type of ideal, in this
09:41type of culture, rather than when you grew up in a more libertine culture.
09:45In general, you also have a stronger, more stronger Madonna whore dichotomy in conservative
09:51political psychology rather than in libertine one.
09:56It's one of the reasons why young men on average tend to be more left leaning because
10:03subconsciously they know that the conservative guy is not so attractive to women and sex
10:11with a libertine mindset, with libertine women is more likely to happen in the short term
10:16as well.
10:17I hope that makes sense, guys.
10:19And one last thing, now take everything I said and throw it away completely.
10:24This is just my theory.
10:27It is me thinking about what could be happening.
10:33However, it's just a theory.
10:35Nobody measured that Arab guys throw money or rely on money more than in the West or
10:41that in the West guys have more game, etc, etc.
10:44However, it's theorizing based on good logic, on good evolutionary psychology, on what I've
10:51also confirmed with my travels and my personal experience.
10:55So, you know, adding several blocks of logics of previous and related evidence, personal
11:01experience, and hopefully I'm not too stupid so I can put dots together.
11:07It could apply, at least in part, or at least some of what I said.
11:11However, my last warning is do not take what manosphere guys say about dating too seriously
11:20because a huge chunk of them are making stuff up and a lot of them are also biased because
11:27they have their own agenda.
11:29Some of them, in my opinion, it's ugly covert misogyny.
11:33So that's my warning.
11:35People always hate me saying that because, yeah, I'm not going to get there anyway.
11:39I hope this was helpful.
11:41And cheers, guys.
11:42See you next time.
11:43Ciao, ciao.