Rocky and Bullwinkle in Topsy Turvy World
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08:52This is Professor Werner Von Beige.
08:54Isn't that Von Brown?
08:55Von Beige. This one bleached out a little.
08:58Well, I can't make head or tail of this.
09:00Ah, then you know.
09:01Know what?
09:02That the world is turning upside down.
09:04Upside down?
09:05Jawohl, topsy-mi-turvy.
09:07And the good professor told our heroes his startling story.
09:10It seems that according to his calculations,
09:12the North Pole was sliding further and further south.
09:14Actually, the Earth is slowly tipping over this way.
09:17Well, everybody needs a change once in a while.
09:20But in six months, the South Pacific is going to be where the Arctic Ocean is now.
09:24Well, I'd put Frostbite Falls, professor.
09:26According to my calculations,
09:28Frostbite Falls should wind up right on the equator.
09:31Gee.
09:31And Chicago will be where Honolulu is.
09:34And what'll happen to Philadelphia?
09:35Oh, they'll still be in the cellar.
09:38Nice to know some things won't change.
09:40But we don't want to live on the equator.
09:42How come?
09:42It's just going to ruin the ice hockey season.
09:45Hey, that's right.
09:46We got to break this thing up.
09:47But how?
09:48Well, I figure if we can find the new North Pole and melt the ice there,
09:52the world may straighten out.
09:54Good idea.
09:55Where is the new North Pole?
09:56It's due west of here, in the Pacific Ocean.
09:59Well, then let's go.
10:00And so a few days later, our heroes were preparing to take off for the West Pole.
10:05You got the stuff to melt the ice, Bowinkle?
10:07There it is, Rock.
10:08Two thousand heating pads,
10:09a hundred pounds of soap,
10:11five hundred incendiary bombs,
10:13and four hundred pictures of Gina Lollapalooza.
10:15Well, some ought to work.
10:17And something did.
10:18The captain turned the switch to reverse jet,
10:20and the huge plane began to lumber down the field, backwards.
10:23Looks like a rough trip ahead of us, Bowinkle.
10:26Looks like a rougher one behind us.
10:27Then as the plane began to rise slowly, tail first,
10:29a small figure waved goodbye from the runway below.
10:32Bye-bye.
10:33Sure nice of him to come see us off, wasn't it?
10:35Oh.
10:36Professor Von Beige.
10:37Professor Von Beige?
10:39You notice kind of an echo in here?
10:41Yes, as fate and Captain Peach Fuzz would have it,
10:43our boys had left behind the only man who knew where in the world they were headed.
10:46What difference does it make?
10:48I can only see where we've been anyway.
10:50Be sure to see our next episode,
10:52Bowinkle Takes the Wheel,
10:54or the Bombsteer.
10:59Well, last time our boys were preparing to leave for their long trip to the West Pole,
11:02but with Captain Peter Peach Fuzz at the wheel,
11:05they found themselves taking off backwards.
11:07Not only that, but they left Professor Von Beige standing on the runway,
11:10and he was the only man who knew where they were going.
11:12And I'll tell you something, Junior, it wasn't there to be.
11:15Bowinkle, we gotta get Captain Peach Fuzz straightened out.
11:18Impossible.
11:19Well, we gotta try.
11:20By this time, even the confused captain had figured out that something was wrong.
11:24Hmm, this is the first plane I've ever flown in that had an observation car.
11:27Faster and faster the plane flew.
11:29Baffling, baffling.
11:31Until it broke through the sound barrier,
11:34and was traveling backwards faster than the speed of sound.
11:36As a result, when Rocky burst into the cabin and started to speak,
11:39his voice sounded like this.
11:41I have no agreement with me.
11:43I have no agreement with me.
11:45I have no agreement with me.
11:47I have no agreement with me.
11:50I have no agreement with me.
11:53I have no agreement with me.
11:54And prompted by Rocky, Captain Peach Fuzz turned the switch to forward,
11:57instantly the plane reversed direction.
11:59But everything inside it kept going the other way, including our friends.
12:03That didn't work out exactly as I planned.
12:06Fortunately, among the things that were falling with our friends
12:08were a number of parachutes,
12:10and in a few minutes, they were all floating safely down,
12:12except Captain Peach Fuzz.
12:14Naturally.
12:15Below them, Professor Von Beige was trudging sadly back to town when suddenly...
12:19Hey, Professor, it's us!
12:21Oh, you've come back for me, how nice!
12:23But where's the airplane?
12:25A good question that, for at that moment,
12:27their abandoned plane broke in half in mid-air,
12:29and part of it landed in a downtown parking lot.
12:32Now there's something you don't see every day, Chauncey.
12:35What's that, Edgar?
12:36Half an airplane just landed in the parking lot.
12:39Oh, I don't know, Edgar.
12:41Another half ought to be here soon.
12:44Wonder how come that half landed later, Chauncey.
12:47That's the tourist section.
12:49True.
12:49Back at the airport, our friends were readying another plane.
12:52Boy, it's sure lucky for us this is a fantasy show.
12:55How come?
12:56If this was for real, this plane would have cost a fortune.
12:59Well, this time with an experienced flyer at the controls...
13:01Rocket G, squirrel his self!
13:03...the plane zoomed skyward and started on its long journey.
13:06Could you make that a short journey?
13:08How come?
13:08I forgot the sandwiches.
13:09But, Bo Winkle, it is a long journey.
13:12Well, couldn't we do like they do in the movies?
13:14Hmm?
13:14You know where you see the hands on the clock spinning,
13:16and the leaves dropping off the calendar,
13:18and the seasons changing,
13:20and the first thing you know...
13:22Bo Winkle, you got a long white beard.
13:25Must have gone too far.
13:26I better put a few leaves back on the calendar.
13:28Better turn the clock back a bit too, Bo Winkle.
13:31How come?
13:31Because we're getting awful low on gas.
13:33And at that moment, the jet engines conked out and the plane started to fall.
13:36Hey, we're going to set a new record.
13:38What's that?
13:39We'll crash two planes in one episode.
13:41We gotta send our position on the radio.
13:43On the what?
13:44On the radio.
13:45Rocky, this may come as a shock to you, but we're not on the radio.
13:49We're on television.
13:50I mean the plane radio.
13:52Plane or FM, we're just not on it.
13:55Captain, what's our position?
13:56I've got it right here.
13:58We're between 56th and 57th Street on Madison Avenue.
14:01Hokey smoke, you know what that means?
14:03It means we're gonna crash right on the J. Walter Stucker Company.
14:07No, it means we got a map of New York City.
14:10Oh, that's terrible.
14:11Yeah, it's a nice place to visit, but I wouldn't...
14:14It's a little too late for jokes now, Bo Winkle.
14:17And the plane plunged dizzily downward.
14:19Be with us next time for the ocean waves or high divers.
14:23I said it was too late for jokes.
14:25So right, Rock. That wasn't funny.
14:30Well, when last we saw Bo Winkle and Rocky, they were plunging straight downward toward...
14:35You're not plunging down.
14:36We are too.
14:37You're going straight.
14:38Ridiculous.
14:39But...
14:39You're just looking at the picture wrong.
14:41Yeah, turn your head sideways.
14:43No, the other way.
14:44Oh, oh, well, that's better.
14:46Yes, our heroes were plummeting toward the ocean far below.
14:49That's better.
14:50But first, a brief word about the plot.
14:52Very brief.
14:52It all started a few days ago with Professor Von Beige's theory of the polar flip.
14:57Yeah, you see, the ice at the North Pole is getting heavier and heavier,
15:00and the whole world's starting to flip over this way.
15:02Which means that the new North Pole, or as we call it the West Pole,
15:05will be somewhere in the Pacific Ocean.
15:08But if we get there and melt the ice, maybe it'll flip back again.
15:11So that's why we were headed west when we ran out of gas.
15:14I still think we're headed west.
15:16Yeah, maybe we'd better bail out, Bo Winkle.
15:19Bail out? We're not sinking, Rock. We're falling.
15:21If only we had a little more gas.
15:23Well, maybe we brought along an extra can.
15:25Let's look through the luggage.
15:26Good idea, Rock. Let's see.
15:28Here's some ice skates, a whistle speed boat...
15:31Hey, what's in here?
15:32Don't open that!
15:34Gee, what was that?
15:35That was my collection of soap bubbles.
15:37Hey, here's a copy of the Congressional Record.
15:39What's that for?
15:41I use it to press flowers in.
15:42Let's see, three pounds of gruffy dust...
15:44Bo Winkle, that's it!
15:46Gruffy dust?
15:47We gotta wait till the dark of the moon if we're gonna...
15:49No, no! The Congressional Record!
15:52I don't want to quibble, Rock, but this is no time to catch up on your reading.
15:55You don't understand.
15:56This is a jet plane, right?
15:58Right!
15:59And a jet is nothing but a lot of hot air, right?
16:01Right!
16:02Well, where are you gonna find more hot air than there is in the Congressional Record?
16:06Mr. Squirrel, this is a scintillating hypothesis.
16:09And a pretty bright idea, too.
16:11In a twinkling, a connection was made and Bo Winkle began to read the Congressional Record into the plane's fuel system.
16:16Mr. Speaker, the glorious history of the grain and seed industry as reflected in the production figures for the period 19 and...
16:237 to 19 and... 12 is...
16:27Bo Winkle, it's working! Keep it up!
16:29For our American system and our children's children against the encroachment of the forces of international outlawry and the abandonment of our precious heritage of...
16:39Hooray! We're saved!
16:41She's never flown better!
16:43Yes, apparently there was enough hot air in that single volume of the Congressional Record to propel a four-engine jet clear around the world.
16:49Wait till the boys at Cape Carnivorous hear about this!
16:52Okay, Captain Peach Fuzz! Which way do we go?
16:55Forward, Rock! He always forwards!
16:57No, no! I'm the ma'am!
16:58Oh, that! Well, let me get it in a better light.
17:01We are heading past E.A. War.
17:04E.A. War? That's an odd name.
17:07It's Welsh, Rocky. In Wales, that means the place where the geese run barefoot.
17:12Could I see that map, Captain?
17:13Certainly, Professor. There it is. E.A. War.
17:16Captain, you're holding the map against the light and reading it backwards!
17:20Oh?
17:21That's really Hawaii!
17:23In Wales? Ridiculous!
17:25Oh, boy!
17:26Meanwhile, back at the moose...
17:27...like to place in the record the names of the Shawnee Falls Arbor Day Committee...
17:31...Lavinia Wagle, Arthur Grinker...
17:34...boy, this is dull stuff...
17:35...Whitney Clapsaddle, Bernard Walkenfuss...
17:37Yes, it was dull. So dull that within three minutes, everybody within hearing distance of Bullwinkle was sound asleep.
17:44And the plane flew onward to...
17:47...all to...
17:49...with honor...
17:50...be with us...
17:52...next time for...
17:56...next time for...
18:26Unfortunately, he ran across the...
18:29...membership list of the Shawnee Falls Arbor Day Committee...
18:32...and the steady drone of names soon put everybody...
18:36...to sleep.
18:36Including the narrators!
18:38Yes. As a result, I don't know where we are now.
18:42Do you, Rocky?
18:43No. Do I what?
18:44Oh, never mind. Captain Peach Fuzz?
18:46I don't think...
18:47Avast, the fantail, and capstan, the landlubber, and... what'd you say?
18:52Professor Von Beige?
18:53Let's sign up with the other side, Otto.
18:55Does Russian winters allow...
18:58Professor, where are we?
19:00We're there, that's where.
19:01Where is there?
19:03There's where is there is there.
19:05Sure enough, when our heroes looked down, they saw a small Pacific island directly beneath them.
19:09Gee, it's sure pretty.
19:10That's the new North Pole?
19:12Jawohl!
19:13Sure ought to pep up the tourist trade.
19:14I wonder if the natives are friendly.
19:16Well, we'll soon find out.
19:18That was true, for at that moment, down on the island,
19:20a band of natives was preparing a big welcome for the boys
19:23under the direction of the native chief,
19:25whose name was...
19:27What is your name, chief?
19:29Hello, Hakeem Osabi. Allow me to introduce myself.
19:32Colonel Oglethorpe Peachtree.
19:34This is my partner, Magnolia Blossom.
19:37Those are odd names to find in the Pacific.
19:39You forget, sonny boy, this is the South Pacific.
19:42Oh, but you're really Boris, and...
19:44Ah-ah, you're giving away the plot.
19:46Don't be a snitch, darling.
19:48Oh, this is terrible.
19:49You're in charge of the island?
19:51Yes, sir, it is.
19:52And what a welcome we give.
19:54Welcome?
19:55We've been practicing for weeks.
19:57First, the fire dance.
19:59Moose and squirrel get hot food from whole tribe.
20:02Then, big two-course dinner
20:04cooked in individual casseroles.
20:05Dinner?
20:06Right.
20:07Squirrel stew and fricassee of moose.
20:10But that's practically a meal for cannibals.
20:12What do you think these boys are, vegetarians?
20:14Colonel, darling, it's time to send the invitations.
20:17Right, Miss Magnolia.
20:18And Boris quickly scrawled invitations
20:20on a number of huge bombs,
20:21and his gang of bloodthirsty cannibals
20:23began to load them into a primitive weapon.
20:26Ready?
20:27Aim.
20:28Fire.
20:30The bomb hurtled on its way,
20:31but it didn't go unobserved.
20:33Unidentified flying object off the port bow.
20:35Or is it a starboard?
20:37Unidentified my foot.
20:38That's a flying bomb.
20:40You mean somebody's shooting at us?
20:42But that's impossible.
20:43In the guidebook, it says the natives
20:45are known to be friendly.
20:46It does.
20:47It says they're known to be harmless.
20:49It does.
20:51There's another thing we know about them, too.
20:52What's that?
20:54They don't read guidebooks.
20:56Listen, we come in peace.
20:59Careful, Captain, or you'll come in pieces.
21:02Gee, those things are getting awful close.
21:03Take it easy, Bullwinkle.
21:05There's only one you've got to worry about.
21:07Which one is that?
21:08The one that has your name on it.
21:09And at that instant, a bomb hurtled through the window
21:11and landed in Bullwinkle's arms.
21:14Hey, Rock, guess what this one says on it.
21:18Rocky and Bullwinkle?
21:20How'd you guess?
21:21And our heroes floated rapidly down
21:22toward the spear-brenishing mob beneath them.
21:24Be sure to see our next ticklish episode,
21:27Six O'Clock Low, or Bullwinkle Gets the Point.
21:33Well, the whole silly business started
21:34with a theory by Professor Werner Von Beige.
21:37I figure that the North Pole is so heavy with ice
21:39that it's starting to wobble like this.
21:41And the new North Pole is really going to be the West Pole.
21:44Wild, n'est-ce pas?
21:45At first, the professor's theory
21:46didn't impress the world's scientists very much.
21:48I tell you, Sir Basil, Von Beige has flipped his wig.
21:51Ho, ho, ho, that's ripping.
21:53What did he say, Basil?
21:54He said Von Beige has inverted his rudded toupee.
21:59Ha, ha, ha, ha.
22:00But people found it less amusing
22:01when the weather actually began to change.
22:03Extreme rain and dry gulch.
22:05Another snowstorm in Miami.
22:08I told you we should have gone to California instead.
22:11You kidding? There they got big floods.
22:13Yeah, but that's normal.
22:15But even more remarkable things were happening
22:16in northern Labrador,
22:18where Eskimos were demanding
22:19bigger and better refrigerators and freezers.
22:21Well, I'm sure you'll be delighted with this one, Mrs. Umiak.
22:24Lots of room for food storage.
22:26Food storage, my eye.
22:28This new house.
22:29So there may be something to the professor's theory after all.
22:32You said it, Sally.
22:33But now let's rejoin Rocky and Bullwinkle
22:35who are floating in parachutes
22:36toward the new North Pole, the island of Rikki-Tikki.
22:39Looks like we're in for trouble, Bullwinkle.
22:42Look there.
22:43The natives were brandishing a forest of sharp spears
22:45led by their chief.
22:46All right, gang, let's hit it with that.
22:48And a walnut, too.
22:49Water like a moo-moo.
22:50Pooey, pooey.
22:51Make it like a boo-boo.
22:53Pooey, pooey.
22:54Sounds pretty ominous.
22:55And downright mean, too.
22:57Water like a moo-moo.
22:59Pooey, pooey.
23:00Make it like a boo-boo.
23:01Pooey, pooey.
23:02Hey, Bullwinkle, you notice anything funny?
23:05If I did, I'd be the first to mention it.
23:07We're not falling anymore.
23:09We're going up.
23:10Up.
23:11But strange as it seems,
23:12our heroes had reversed direction
23:14for every time the natives said...
23:15Pooey, pooey.
23:16They sent a gust of air upward
23:18that lifted the parachute skyward again.
23:20Water like a moo-moo.
23:21Pooey, pooey.
23:22Make it like a boo-boo.
23:24Pooey, pooey.
23:25Hold it, hold it, you guys.
23:26What kind of spear dance is that?
23:28Who wrote those lines?
23:29You write them, Colonel.
23:30Take that man's name and serial number.
23:32But, Colonel, you ask him question.
23:35When I want a man's answer, I'll tell him you.
23:37Meanwhile, our heroes were drifting downward again
23:39some distance away.
23:41Well, looks like we're safe for a little while, Bullwinkle.
23:44I'd better go down ahead and find a good landing place.
23:47Go down ahead?
23:48Sure, did you forget I'm a flying squirrel?
23:50Then how come you didn't fly away
23:52when them fellers were playing shish kebab with us?
23:54And leave my old buddy never.
23:57I should have known.
23:58Well, I'll find us all a good place to stay.
24:01Bye now.
24:04Golly, what a pal.
24:06Makes a feller come all over gulpy.
24:09But our boys had once again underestimated their opponent
24:11who now stood in the clearing
24:13talking to two fierce-looking hawks.
24:15OK, Howard, Emery, this is your target for tonight.
24:18Got it? Good.
24:20Boris, you sure they'll do the job?
24:22Of course. These are only hawks in the world
24:24with stainless steel beaks.
24:26What about their talons?
24:28What else? Every little pinky dipped in poison.
24:31Just one scratch and squirrel is kaput.
24:33Oh, darling, you've done it again.
24:36Naturally.
24:37But how did you ever find birds with poisoned talons?
24:40It's easy, Natasha, I called an agent.
24:42Agent?
24:43Not an agent, really.
24:44More of a talon scout.
24:46And as if to get away from such a dreadful joke
24:48the two hawks flapped off toward their prey.
24:50How will Rocky fare against these marauders of the sky?
24:53We'll find out next time in Boris Goes for Broke
24:56or a fiend in need is a fiend indeed.
25:04Well, last time you remember
25:05as our heroes were trying to land on the island of Rikki-Tikki
25:08Rocky slipped out of his parachute harness
25:09and began to reconnoitre the island.
25:11At the same time, the notorious Boris Badanov
25:14masquerading as Colonel Oglethorpe Peachtree
25:16had released two vicious hawks named Howard and Emery
25:19to attack Rocky in the air.
25:21Meanwhile, what of our other two friends
25:23Professor Von Beige and Captain Peachfuzz?
25:26Never mind us. Get on with the story.
25:29Well, the two feathered killers rode through the air
25:31searching for our hero and at last spotted him.
25:36In a few seconds, they were diving swiftly at our unsuspecting hero
25:39one from one side, one from the other
25:40but the attack hadn't gone unnoticed.
25:42Jumping! Gee, horse fat!
25:44Rocky! Look out! Beware!
25:47Hawk tongue!
25:48It was no use. Rocky was too far below to hear Bullwinkle's bellowing.
25:51Well, I can clout one of them hawks anyway.
25:53And Bullwinkle hurled his binoculars down at the attackers.
25:56Unfortunately, they went right past the hawks and...
25:59Ow!
26:01Yes, the heavy glasses knocked Rocky and Emery down
26:03Yes, the heavy glasses knocked Rocky into a spin
26:05just as his two pursuers closed in on him.
26:08As a result...
26:10Yes, the two hawks had destroyed each other
26:12as a result of Bullwinkle's wily stratagem.
26:14No, it was more of a sidearm curveball.
26:17But...
26:17Almost a knuckler.
26:18I mean...
26:18And I took a little off it, too.
26:20Well, anyway, Rocky finally recovered enough
26:23to pull out of his spin.
26:24Gee, I must have hit an air pocket.
26:27Meanwhile, in the clearing below
26:28Boris was unaware of what had happened until...
26:31Ow!
26:32What is it, darling?
26:33These glasses fell out of sky and...
26:35Oh, boy!
26:36What is it, Boris?
26:38You don't suppose there really is somebody up there
26:40who's watching all the time?
26:42Not through these, anyway. Look.
26:44Property of Bullwinkle Moose.
26:46Give me those.
26:47And as Boris looked through the glasses...
26:49Moose is okay, squirrel is okay, hawks are kaput.
26:53Oh, Natasha, do you ever get these days
26:55where everything goes right?
26:57No, knock them off, squirrel-corded one-up.
26:59No, after him, you idiots!
27:02And remember, first idiot to catch him
27:03gets squirrel-tail for his radio aerial.
27:08See? You got to provide worthwhile incentives, Natasha.
27:11Only one thing, Boris.
27:13Yes?
27:13Why we're doing all this?
27:15What?
27:16What is your fiendish plot?
27:18I thought you'd never ask.
27:20Hold it! Everybody, hold it!
27:24That's better.
27:25Now, fiendish plot.
27:27It all starts with the professor's theory.
27:29Too much ice at North Pole.
27:31World dips over this way and we got new North Pole, right?
27:35Right.
27:35And this very island will be the new North Pole.
27:38But what's that got to do with...
27:39Think, Natasha, who lives at North Pole?
27:42Penguins?
27:43That's South Pole.
27:46Who lives at North Pole?
27:47Give me a hint.
27:49You know.
27:49Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle la-la-la.
27:52Swiss bell ringers.
27:54No, no, no.
27:55With a beard and the ho-ho-ho-ho.
27:57And jingle bells, jingle bells.
27:59I've got it, Boris.
28:00Who?
28:01Mitch Miller.
28:02Yeah.
28:03No, you idiot woman.
28:05Santy Claus.
28:07Boris, you say the naughty word.
28:09It's all in a good cause, Natasha.
28:11What cause?
28:12Santy cause.
28:13You mean...
28:14Yes.
28:15I, Boris Bedenoff, am going to be the new Santy.
28:18How about that, Natasha?
28:20Natasha?
28:22She fainted.
28:23But we'll find out more about Boris' mad, mad, mad scheme in our next episode,
28:27The Fright Before Christmas, or A Visit From St. Nicholas.
28:57Right here, Natasha, on the island of Rikki-Tikki.
29:01In a couple of months, we'll be living at the North Pole.
29:03So?
29:04So, who lives at the North Pole?
29:06I give you three guesses.
29:07Santy Claus, George Crater and the Lane Sisters.
29:11George Crater and the Lane Sisters?
29:13I didn't want to waste the other two guesses, darling.
29:15Oh.
29:16So guess now who's going to be the new Santy Claus.
29:20Oh, not you, Boris.
29:22You're not just whistling, are you?
29:24But for badness sake, why?
29:26Use your head, Natasha. Just think.
29:29First, I get to wear big white beard in disguise, no?
29:33I guess.
29:34Then, on Christmas Eve, I start out in bulletproof sleigh and visit everybody's house.
29:40Down the chimney, I go and...
29:42It's Santy Claus!
29:44Ho, ho, ho! Stick him up!
29:47And for the first time in history, Santy Claus carries presents up the chimney instead of down.
29:53Oh, marvelous, darling.
29:55Say, I could even visit the First National Bank.
29:58Ho, ho, ho, ho!
30:00Here's a Christmas card from old Santa.
30:03Season's greetings. Hand over the cash.
30:06But, but...
30:07What's the matter? You don't have the spirit of giving?
30:09But I thought...
30:10And don't try to ring the alarm.
30:12My elves got you covered.
30:15Just think, from now on, Santy goes back to North Pole with a sleigh full of loot.
30:19Ho, ho, ho!
30:21Merry Christmas, boys. Here's your card.
30:23Thanks, Santy.
30:25And remember, try to double-cross jolly old Santy and you go for a one-way sleigh ride.
30:29Yeah, sure, Santy, sure.
30:31I tell you, Natasha, the Jingle Bells racket is worth billions.
30:35Boris, this is the meanest, crookedest, most low-down thing you have ever done.
30:40I thought you'd like it.
30:41Unaware of all this, our boy Rocky the Flying Squirrel was still diving earthward, groggy from a blow on the head.
30:47Then at the last minute...
30:48Where am I?
30:50Uh-oh.
30:51Gee, I must have blacked out for a second.
30:54I'd better land in that clearing till my head stops buzzing.
30:57Little did Rocky dream that that clearing was surrounded by the fierce natives of Rikki-Tikki.
31:01Every native holding a sharp spear, except for one who was holding a large pot and a cookbook.
31:07Meanwhile, back at the moose, Bullwinkle was having troubles of his own.
31:10Great gobs of gruffy dust. Things look mighty rugged down there.
31:13They did that, for Bullwinkle was headed straight down toward a swamp full of man-eating crocodiles.
31:18Yeah, and I got a hunch they're moose-eaters, too.
31:21Well, there was only one thing for an intelligent, cool-headed moose to do.
31:24He tried to climb up inside his parachute.
31:27Of course, the parachute instantly collapsed on one side and slid sideways.
31:31Just enough sideways to carry Bullwinkle out of danger and let him land safely.
31:35No sooner had he hit the ground than...
31:37Bullwinkle, help!
31:39That's Rocky, and he's in trouble!
31:41Of course, Bullwinkle started off to Rocky's aid, but he'd forgotten all about his parachute,
31:44which at that moment enveloped him in yards and yards of yards and yards, so that he couldn't move.
31:50Oh! Oh! Oh!
31:52Well, it looks as if Rocky is really in a stew.
31:55Not yet, but it's only a matter of time.
31:58Be with us for our next red-hot episode, Soup's On, or Rocky Goes to Pot.
32:06The travel books say that the South Pacific island of Rikki-Tikki is a land of nothing but fun, fun, fun.
32:11But in our last episode, Rocky was seized by natives who seemed to have some rather special dinner plans for him.
32:16And that's no fun, believe me!
32:18You hush mouth! No one's backtalk from main course!
32:21Of course, Bullwinkle landed by parachute just a short distance away.
32:24But as he started to Rocky's aid, the chute landed on top of him, and he started to stagger about blindly.
32:29Oh! Oh! Oh!
32:31And with our other two friends, the captain and the professor, hung up in a wait-a-bit bush,
32:34things looked pretty gosh-awful for our side.
32:37Like it says, nothing but fun, fun, fun!
32:40Meanwhile, back at the clearing...
32:42Let's see. Who we invite to dinner, Sam?
32:44What about Naralutu tribe?
32:46We owe them dinner.
32:47You! You remember they have us over last month for roast brisket of missionary.
32:52Hmm. Think Squirrel big enough to go around?
32:54Hmm. Better add more carrots, Mobutu.
32:57Who else we invite?
32:58I'd like to invite somebody.
33:00You? Who you invite?
33:02The United States Marines!
33:04Hehehehe! Squirrel pretty good sport, huh?
33:07Very sweet kid. In fact, he's so sweet...
33:10You gonna let me go?
33:11No. But maybe we serve you for dessert instead.
33:14Oh, boy.
33:15Yes, Rocky was in hot water all right, all right.
33:17And he might have wound up as just another entry in the rickety-ticky fireside cookbook,
33:21if just then...
33:25Uh-oh. What that, Sam?
33:27Nothing human, you bet.
33:31Sound like great swamp spirit!
33:34Oh, come on, Mobutu! This 20th century!
33:37You got point, Sam. No great swamp spirit, huh?
33:40No.
33:40Then... then what that?
33:42Sure enough, coming at them out of the gloom was an eerie, shapeless figure.
33:45Three, two, one!
33:48Well, no just stand there, Mobutu!
33:50Run!
33:51I thought this was 20th century!
33:53It is! But how we know great swamp spirit count that high?
33:57You got point, Sam.
33:59And the terrified rickety-tickians fled for the bush.
34:01But at that moment, the great swamp spirit tripped over a root,
34:04there was a tearing sound,
34:06and out popped none other than...
34:08Bo Winkle! It was really you with your parachute draped over you!
34:12Yeah! I'm gonna write a letter to that company and I'm...
34:15Gee! That was a brilliant idea!
34:17I'll tell them their ding-busted parachutes are a brilliant idea!
34:21Sure! Those natives thought you were the great swamp spirit!
34:24Uh... swamp spirit?
34:27Sure! It's a ghost that's all white and creepy-looking.
34:31You mean, like that thing there?
34:34Bo Winkle!
34:34I'll get it!
34:36Oh!
34:37I tried to tell you that your other foot...
34:40Yeah, I figured that. Only one thing bothers me.
34:42What's that?
34:43What are you doing in that silly bathtub?
34:45But this is...
34:45I know it isn't Saturday, so why the tub?
34:48But...
34:48Full of carrots, too!
34:49Oh, come on!
34:51Never thought you'd go hi-hat, Rocky.
34:53Hi-hat?
34:54You're the only fella I know who takes a 14-carat bath!
34:58But while this gay baronage was taking place,
35:00the island of Rikki-Tikki was swinging farther and farther north.
35:03As a result, the temperature dropped suddenly,
35:05and our heroes found themselves in a very cold climate.
35:08Bo Winkle, the weather's changing!
35:11How can you tell?
35:12Well, the barometer pressure's dropping.
35:14Uh-huh.
35:15And those are cirrus clouds up there.
35:17True.
35:18And besides...
35:19Yes, yes?
35:20The water's frozen solid, and I can't get out of this pot!
35:23Oh, Sainted Aunt Agnes McGee!
35:25Is Rocky doomed to remain a talking ice cube till this story is over?
35:29We'll find out more in Snowbank Squirrel...
35:32...or Bo Winkle Gets the Drift!
36:02But if you light a fire under this pot, it'll melt the ice!
36:06A pretty brainy idea, Rock.
36:08I'm sure glad you're not frozen both ends.
36:10Me too!
36:11So Bo Winkle struck a match and tried to light the kindling under Rocky's pot,
36:14but to no avail.
36:15What's the matter, Bo Winkle?
36:16It was so cold that the match flame had frozen solid.
36:19Might as well put it away till it thaws out, no use wasting it.
36:22Gee, I can't move!
36:24Sure you can!
36:25How?
36:25I'll carry you!
36:26And the mighty moose hoisted his pal and started off.
36:28Bo Winkle!
36:30I'm right here, Rock.
36:30I didn't say anything.
36:32I could have sworn I heard somebody say...
36:34Rocky!
36:35Hey, that's another voice!
36:36Yeah, pretty blood-chilling, isn't it?
36:38Not very blood-chilling, Rock.
36:40Maybe not for you, but I'm so cold already it doesn't take much.
36:44Oh, they were familiar-type voices too!
36:46Well, course they were!
36:47That was Captain Peter Peachfuzz and the Professor.
36:50They must be in trouble.
36:51Sure enough, as Bo Winkle looked down from the top of the hill,
36:54he saw their two friends being carried away by a band of half-frozen but still ferocious natives.
37:00We gotta stop them!
37:01You bet!
37:02Hey, cut that out, you guys!
37:04It's Bo Winkle and Rocky!
37:06Cut that out, I say!
37:08I do wish he'd stop saying, cut that out!
37:11Why?
37:12I'm afraid the natives will take the hint.
37:14Well, the natives lined up in battle array before the charging moose,
37:17their sharp spears at the ready,
37:19and Bo Winkle chose that moment to trip over his feet.
37:22Oops!
37:23He's done for!
37:24Him? What about us?
37:26But in falling, Bo Winkle had dropped the pot containing Rocky and his ice cube.
37:32Oh, BuzzFuzz, I got a split.
37:35That's gonna be hard to pick up, too.
37:37Not too hard, really, for while the Captain and the Professor took care of one rickety-in,
37:42the empty pot took care of the other.
37:44Empty pot?
37:46Looky there! Rocky on the rocks!
37:48The collision had freed the plucky squirrel and he sat unharmed on a pile of ice cubes.
37:53Well, Professor, looks like your theory was right.
37:56It's pretty cold.
37:57Yeah, but I wish I wasn't quite so right.
38:00And a little bit warmer.
38:01But at that moment...
38:05What happened?
38:06We're in luck!
38:07I think Bo Winkle's match is thawed out.
38:09Come on!
38:10And while our friends tried to warm their hands behind a smoldering Bo Winkle,
38:14they were watched by a pair of evil eyes belonging to...
38:17belonging to...
38:19Oh, no.
38:20Ho, ho, ho! Give a guess who!
38:23Oh, come on now, you're not Santa Claus, you're Boris Baranov.
38:26I'm Sandy Claus and I can prove it.
38:28How?
38:29I got a witness.
38:30My assistant, Elf Elf.
38:33Isn't she a little tall for an elf?
38:35It's the high heels, darling. They fool you.
38:37Oh, boy.
38:38Well, Elf, it's time to pay our first visit.
38:41To whom, Santa darling?
38:42To those goody goods on the other end of island.
38:45And I take everybody a present, too.
38:48What kind of present?
38:49What else?
38:51Bom-boms!
38:53Well, will Boris's dastardly scheme really succeed?
38:56We'll find out next time in Clause and Effect, or You'll Be Sorry.
39:07Well, it finally happened.
39:08Professor Von Beige's theory of the polar flip actually came to pass,
39:12and the Earth really had a new North Pole.
39:14Of course, this caused a great deal of consternation all over the world.
39:17London, for instance.
39:18Let's face it, old bean, we're living on a ruddy, tropical island.
39:22It was true.
39:23Moscow attended the opening day at Ascot in sarongs,
39:25the House of Lords discarded its ermines,
39:27and dressed exclusively in moo-moos,
39:29and even the familiar London bobbies looked different.
39:31Their helmets were the same, but they now wore shorts and ankle-length stockings called...
39:35If you say bobby socks, so help me, old basher.
39:38Moscow, too, had its troubles.
39:39But you've got to do it, Commissar.
39:41No, Vassily, impossible.
39:43But it's too hot. I've got to go where it's cool.
39:45I can do a thing for you.
39:46But you can't.
39:47Please, Commissar, send me to Siberia.
39:50And the sudden change in directions had dire effects in the U.S. as well.
39:54Hey, Clint, how come you're looking so down in the mouth?
39:57I'm just looking at the new map here, Harold.
39:59And?
40:00The full enormity of what's happened just hit me.
40:03Enormity?
40:04Yep. Look, Texas is now way up here.
40:07What difference does that make, Clint?
40:09Don't you see, Harold? From now on, we're Yankees.
40:12As a matter of fact, only one man seemed delighted at the change,
40:15and he was on the island of Rikki-Tikki, which formed the new North Pole.
40:19His name, Boris Baranoff.
40:21Or as we call him, St. Nietzschelaus.
40:24Yes, Boris had decided to put himself in the Santa Claus business.
40:27You know a better location?
40:28Think of it, Natasha. People invite you down their chimneys every year.
40:32It's like a license to steal.
40:34As if you needed one, darling.
40:36And for his first call, Boris decided to pay a visit to Bullwinkle and Rocky,
40:40who were at that moment trying to work out a plan.
40:42Bullwinkle, we just got to get the world straightened up.
40:45Yeah, and after we do that, let's figure out what to have for dinner.
40:48Fortunately, our heroes had the help of Professor Von Beige himself.
40:51Gentlemen, I've got it.
40:52A way to straighten up the world?
40:54No, what to have for dinner.
40:56First, a little cartofle souper medley.
40:57Maybe we ought to solve the other problem first.
41:00Rocky, when my stomach starts growling, there are no other problems.
41:03Well, let's ask ourselves how this happened in the first place.
41:06Alrighty. How did this happen in the first place?
41:09I don't know.
41:10Me either. Let's get an easier question.
41:12It happened because the old North Pole got too heavy with ice and snow
41:16and slipped over sideways.
41:18Then that's what we'll do.
41:20Slip over sideways?
41:21No, make it snow up here.
41:23Hey, that's a great idea if we don't freeze to death first.
41:26Yes, that was a problem, for with the shift in climate,
41:28the bottom had fallen out of every thermometer on the island.
41:31Hundreds of natives shivered in the icy blasts.
41:33Go on, Chief. Try tell us climate isn't changing.
41:36You young punks always complaining.
41:38This just little cold snap.
41:40Cold snap? Man, we living at North Pole.
41:43This is living.
41:44Nonsense, boys. This tropic zone.
41:46Then who that coming?
41:48Commander Whitehead?
41:49Jumping Juju, it's Santa Claus.
41:51And his helper.
41:53Then it true, world has flipped.
41:55Ho, ho, ho, darling.
41:56Hey, hey, Santy, you got a pair red flannels for me?
41:59You been a good boy, haven't you?
42:01You bet I'm.
42:02That's why you don't have red flannels.
42:04Be bad boy and steal some. Ho, ho, ho.
42:07You know something, Chief?
42:08Huh?
42:09Not only world flip, Santa flip too.
42:12No, it wasn't the same old generous Santa.
42:14What do you talk?
42:15I got it here special Christmas present for Moose.
42:18Oh, well, that's different.
42:19What is it?
42:20I give you one clue.
42:22It's a ticking package.
42:23Uh, an alarm clock?
42:25A wrist watch?
42:26An egg timer?
42:27See, Natasha?
42:28You can fool some of the people all the time.
42:30And we'll find out just how many people
42:32in Boom at the Top are the angry young Moose.
42:38Well, last time you remember,
42:39Boris Batanov disguised himself as Santa Claus
42:41and started off to deliver a present to Bullwinkle,
42:44a present that goes tick-tock.
42:46Until he opens it, then it goes kaboom.
42:49In just a little while,
42:50he approached our shivering friends and...
42:52Hello, hello, hello.
42:54Ho, ho, ho, everybody. Merry Christmas.
42:56Hokey smoke, Bullwinkle. Look at that.
42:58It's Sandy Claus.
43:00He looks a little seedy to me.
43:01Look at that beard.
43:03It's molting, darling.
43:04Always looks a little scraggly this time of year.
43:07And who are you?
43:08Santa's little helper, Alf Elf.
43:11Alf Elf!
43:13Santa, they don't believe in me.
43:16They don't even believe in me.
43:18Now, wait a itty-bitty minute.
43:19Nobody's gonna tell me I don't believe in Sandy Claus.
43:22Not even Sandy Claus himself is gonna tell me that.
43:25That's the spirit, little fellow.
43:26And just for that, here is your present,
43:28a warm wooly coat to wear.
43:30Gee, dandy.
43:31Merry Christmas. Ho, ho, ho.
43:34That ho, ho, ho sounded pretty phony to me.
43:37Yes, that's the first time I ever heard of Sandy Claus talking dialect.
43:41Oh, come now.
43:42Are you trying to destroy a young moose's faith in Christmas?
43:45Oh, for gunny sacks.
43:47What is it, Bullwinkle?
43:48What a yuletide boo-boo.
43:49What is?
43:50We didn't give him a present.
43:51Well, I really don't think he was expecting one.
43:53Makes no never-thee-minds, Rock.
43:55We got to give Sandy a present.
43:57Yeah, but we don't have a present to give him.
43:59No, nothing but this one.
44:00Hey, that's it.
44:01That's what I said.
44:02We'll give him this present.
44:03That's what I said.
44:04So, with warm hearts and frostbitten fingers, our boys re-wrap Boris' present.
44:08This way, Bullwinkle.
44:09We'll hit him off at the ice floe.
44:11Do you think he'll mind getting his own present back again?
44:13He may not know it's his.
44:14I guess you're right.
44:15If you've seen one warm woolly coat, you've seen them all.
44:17Besides, you already have a warm woolly coat.
44:20True, though it is wearing out a little.
44:22Oh!
44:23What?
44:24I forgot.
44:25This is my own personal belt.
44:26Hey, here he comes, Bullwinkle.
44:29See, Rock, let's just toss it in his sleigh as he goes by.
44:32That way, it'll be more of a surprise.
44:34Bullwinkle neatly tossed the package into the rear of his motorized sleigh.
44:37What a jolt he'll get when he opens it.
44:39I'll bet.
44:40I'd give a purdy to be there.
44:42I sure like surprises.
44:43Well, you're gonna love this, then.
44:45Look behind you.
44:47Indeed, for our heroes were surrounded by a band of ferocious ricky-tickians.
44:51Gee, they're blue as coal, Bullwinkle.
44:53That's because they got no warm woolly coats like you and me, Rock.
44:56True, but it's only a matter of time.
44:58You mean...
44:59You said him.
45:00Squirrel coat, just the thing for cold weather.
45:02Yeah, but I'm not big enough to make a coat.
45:05Then I make moose coat with squirrel collar.
45:08Pretty sporty, huh?
45:09But to do that, you have to skin us.
45:12You got him another way?
45:13I knew I should have had a zipper put in.
45:15We've got to stall for time, Bullwinkle,
45:17till Captain Peachfuzz and the professor get here.
45:19Well, that shouldn't take long.
45:20How come?
45:21They're right over there.
45:23Captain, you've dealt with South Pacific Islanders before.
45:26What do we do?
45:28Well, the usual thing is to bargain.
45:30Bargain?
45:31Sure, break out the trade goods, do a little swapping.
45:34Swapping?
45:35Yes, you let them wear your glass beads,
45:37they let you wear your head.
45:39Sounds like an even trade.
45:41Well, let's start swapping.
45:43Um, what's the going price for a moose head?
45:46No want beads, no want mirrors.
45:48Well, what do you want?
45:49Want warm woolly coat.
45:50Oh, careful, that's fastened onto me.
45:53We fix him that.
45:54Wait, I got an idea.
45:55What is it, Rocky?
45:56I can't tell you.
45:57What? Why not?
45:58Because it's the end of the episode.
46:00You know he's right,
46:01but be sure to see the next episode,
46:03Fur Fur Away, or Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow.
46:09Well, I hate to be the bearer of bad tidings,
46:11but at last report, things were in a dreadful state.
46:14The world had flipped sideways,
46:15Boris was about to make a billion dollar record
46:17out of the Santa Claus business,
46:18and our friends had been captured by some half-frozen natives
46:21who insisted on skinning Bullwinkle to make warm woolly coats.
46:25Just one question.
46:26Who packed these boxes of trading goods?
46:28I packed them personally, Rocky, but...
46:30Okay, open them up, Bullwinkle.
46:32But Rocky, those are hot weather items only.
46:34Trinkets, fans, dark glasses, bikinis.
46:37But the good captain wasn't called wrong way peach fuzz for nothing,
46:40for those boxes packed for the tropics were full of...
46:43Warm woolly coats!
46:46Captain, your stupidity saved the day.
46:49Oh, it was nothing that any navy man couldn't have done.
46:52Now we gotta find a way to straighten the world up.
46:54But how?
46:55Well, according to your theory, professor,
46:57the world tilted over because the ice and snow
47:00got too heavy at the old North Pole.
47:02Yeah?
47:03Well, then all we have to do is make the ice and snow
47:05too heavy at the new North Pole.
47:07Sure, Charlie, but how?
47:09We could ask people to send it in.
47:10Please, Bullwinkle.
47:11No, no, he's right.
47:13He is? I am?
47:14Sure, we'll do a big snow telethon.
47:16And so the call went out all over the topsy-turvy television world.
47:20Send your old ice and snow to the island of Rikki-Tikki, folks.
47:23And let's straighten up.
47:25And fly right.
47:26And people did just that.
47:27From the ice-bound shores of California
47:29to the snow-capped jungles of Tanganyika,
47:31people began to send ice and snow to Rikki-Tikki.
47:33By the train full, by the plane full,
47:35by the ship full, even by the tray full.
47:37That's it, folks, keep it coming.
47:39One more snowstorm should do it, Rocky.
47:41One more snowstorm, eh?
47:43And before you could say tootin' on a whiffin' pickle,
47:45the plucky squirrel had grabbed a nearby sack of silver iodide crystals
47:48and was zooming through the air over the island.
47:50Silver iodide crystals?
47:52If you drop them into a cold cloud, it makes snow.
47:55Oh!
47:56Yes, Rocky was flashing through the frigid air above the island,
47:58seeding the clouds.
47:59Hi-ho! Silver iodide!
48:02And everywhere that Rocky went,
48:03he left a curtain of white falling behind him.
48:05Gentlemen, please take off your hat.
48:08How come?
48:09This is a solemn moment.
48:10We are witnessing the greatest snow job in history.
48:13And it was true.
48:14The added weight of the snow began to tilt the island over more and more.
48:17And within a few hours, the world had flipped back to normal.
48:20And everybody was delighted with the change,
48:22except for one old gentleman who lay basking in the sun.
48:25Oh, confounded, I knew they'd find a way sooner or later.
48:30All right, come on, boys, the vacation is over.
48:34We're coming, Santa Claus!
48:36Yes, the island of Rikki-Tikki suddenly swung back into the warm South Pacific again,
48:40and, of course, all that ice began to melt.
48:43The result was a fantastic flood in which two woebegone figures struggled.
48:47Well, Boris, there goes the Santa Claus racket.
48:49Well, easy come, easy go.
48:51Boris, you're not unhappy?
48:53Of course not.
48:54It's first story where I wind up with something.
48:56What?
48:57This present the moose gave me when he thought I was Santa Claus.
49:01He looks a lot like present you gave him with bomb in it.
49:04Nonsense. Would moose be stupid enough to give me back my own present?
49:07Well...
49:08On second thought, maybe I...
49:11What were you going to say, Boris?
49:13Only one thing, Natasha.
49:15Shut up your mouth!
49:19Well, anyway, Bullwinkle, we managed to give Santa Claus a well-earned vacation in the sun.
49:24Yeah, I can hardly wait to see the old fella next time he gets here.
49:27How come?
49:28Cause I'm dreaming of a tan Christmas.
49:31Aren't we all?
49:32And also dreaming of our next episode of Rocky Squirrel and Bullwinkle Moose.