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00:30Le jardin de la pêche
00:50Un jour, Parsley est allé dans le jardin de la pêche
00:53quand il a vu un arbre.
00:55Il y avait de l'écrit sur le sol, en dessous.
00:58De cette façon à Mahatma Dhill, il a dit.
01:02Mahatma Dhill ?
01:04Celui-ci a besoin de regarder.
01:07Je ne peux pas imaginer qu'il soit encore en haut.
01:09C'est trop tôt.
01:11Bon Dieu !
01:13Il devient plus curieux et plus curieux.
01:16Il vaut mieux donner un autre son.
01:18Il y a plus à cela que les yeux.
01:21Bonjour.
01:22C'est Dhill.
01:23C'est agréable de te voir.
01:24L'absence fait que l'esprit ne s'éloigne pas.
01:26Tu m'as fait sauter, a dit Parsley.
01:29En plus, que veux-tu dire
01:31l'absence fait que l'esprit ne s'éloigne pas ?
01:33Nous avons vu l'un l'autre hier.
01:35C'est écrit que la fortune
01:38claque au moins une fois sur chaque porte d'un chien.
01:40Je savais que tu allais venir si j'attendais longuement.
01:43Qu'est-ce qu'il dit ?
01:45Je t'ai appelé depuis des siècles.
01:48Qu'est-ce que c'est que tout ça ?
01:49Holy sweet Marley Ponce
01:52stuff over the door.
01:55Holy sweet Marley Ponce
01:59Ask Dhill carelessly.
02:01That means
02:02disgraced may he be who thinks ill.
02:06It's French.
02:07I've never heard you say it before.
02:09What are you doing dressed up like that ?
02:12It's part of my new image.
02:14We Mahatmas must stick together.
02:18I wouldn't like to get mistaken for just any old dog.
02:22I'm starting a campaign for a better life.
02:25I'm collecting all my thoughts.
02:28You can have a packet of assorted ones for sixpence if you like.
02:32Sixpence ?
02:33Your thoughts ?
02:35I've got plenty of my own thank you very much.
02:38I'll throw in a few extra ones free.
02:41Where did you get them ?
02:43Ask Parsley suspiciously.
02:45They came to me
02:47sitting here beneath the tree of knowledge.
02:50Hiding behind the tree of idleness, more like, said Parsley.
02:55How about two packets for ninepence ?
02:58They're very good for putting in crackers.
03:02Here's a free sample, especially for you.
03:05Early to bed, early to rise,
03:07makes a lion healthy, wealthy and wise.
03:11No thank you, said Parsley.
03:14Coming events cast their shadows before them,
03:17said Dhill sadly.
03:19Getting darker already.
03:21Where's my book ? I must put a stop to this.
03:25That's funny.
03:29What's happened to it ?
03:31Many would be cowards if they durst.
03:34I'll throw that one in as well if you like.
03:36What do you mean, durst ?
03:38Well, that's what it says in your book.
03:41My book ?
03:43No wonder he's gone knowledgeable all of a sudden.
03:47There's a destiny that shapes our ends, called Dhill.
03:50Refuel them how we will.
03:52Your end will be shaped if you don't watch out.
03:56I'd like my book back, please,
03:59when I think of all the things I've done for him.
04:03No man is a hero to his valet, said Dhill.
04:06You wait.
04:08I was only trying to make some money
04:10in case I wanted to buy you a birthday present sometime.
04:13Of all the ungrateful, what did you say ?
04:16Birthday present ?
04:18I don't know if there's anything particular you fancy.
04:21Make room for another, called Parsnip.
04:24You can share one of my bones if you like.
04:27Get your sayings here, amazing hopper.
04:30Get your sayings here, no time like the present.
04:35Their words butter no parsnips.
04:39Their words butter no parsnips.
04:43Repeated Parsnip.
04:45That's what it says here, page 327.
04:50Can you think of anything better ?
04:52Yes, I can.
04:54Good night, good night.
04:57Parting is such sweet sorrow
05:00that I shall say good night till it be tomorrow.
05:04I say, that's jolly good, exclaimed Dhill.
05:08If you want a thing well done, do it yourself.
05:13Mahatma Dhill, indeed.
05:16They say, it's Christmas, today.
05:18Right !
05:20It's Christmas, eh ?
05:21That's right !
05:22It's Christmas, eh ?
05:24Right !
05:25Today, it's Christmas.
05:28You mean, today ?
05:30Yes, today.
05:32Very good.
05:34We shall go and see the place.
05:41I say, it's Christmas, today.
05:45Ça a l'air d'être un jour mystérieux.
05:48Il y a un odeur différente d'un mystère dans l'air.
05:51Où est mon livre?
05:55A pour Orsis, G pour Dieu sain.
05:59Ah, ici nous sommes. M pour Mystère.
06:03L'un des plus grands mystères du moment
06:06c'est ce qui s'est passé à Mr. Bayleaf's pot de peinture brun.
06:13Savez-vous que quelqu'un a été à votre peinture, Mr. Bayleaf?
06:17Demandez-le-lui.
06:18Qu'est-ce que c'est? Je l'aime.
06:20Peu importe qui c'est, je l'aime.
06:22J'ai eu l'occasion spéciale de peindre mon logue.
06:25Où est constable Knapweed?
06:29Je vais peindre mon logue, dit constable Knapweed.
06:34Cette peinture, quelle couleur a-t-elle été?
06:37Quelle couleur? Elle va revenir pour un refil quand vous aurez tout peint.
06:42Ah, c'est une sérieuse affaire.
06:44C'est peut-être le travail d'une gang.
06:46Nous devons tous être préparés.
06:48J'aimerais demander à Major Onion
06:50de donner à tout le monde une lecture sur l'art de la self-défense cet après-midi.
06:55Merci, merci.
06:57Comme vous le savez, j'ai appelé cette réunion
07:00pour que Mr. Onion puisse donner un petit discours
07:02sur l'art de la self-défense.
07:04C'est une bonne idée, exclama Sebastian.
07:06Fais doucement, Sebastian.
07:09Merci, Madame Rosemary.
07:11Mr. Onion.
07:13Pour cette démonstration,
07:15je vais demander l'aide d'un volontaire de bon corps.
07:18Laissez-moi le faire, je vais le montrer.
07:21Ah, j'ai pris ma peinture pour un nouveau logue.
07:24Bonhomme, c'est ce que j'aime voir.
07:26Une des premières règles à apprendre
07:29est ce qu'on appelle la position de freeride.
07:31Les pieds éloignés, les bras enlevés de l'un à l'autre
07:34pour que vous puissiez s'éloigner et toucher vos pieds.
07:36Mr. Onion, touchez vos pieds.
07:38Numéro de point.
07:39Commencez.
07:40Un, deux, trois.
07:43Très bien, très bien, en effet.
07:45Maintenant, si vous voulez rester en place,
07:47je vais démontrer l'assassinat d'Iphthro
07:49pour l'aide de...
07:51Vous m'avez trompé.
07:53Je suis coincé.
07:54J'ai été assassiné, d'accord ?
07:55Jusqu'à mon dos.
07:56Seizez-moi bien et bien.
08:00Bonne chance, Mr. Onion.
08:05Est-ce qu'il y a quelqu'un d'autre dans l'audience
08:07qui pourrait m'aider à démontrer l'assassinat d'Iphthro ?
08:14Merci, sage.
08:16Maintenant, certains d'entre vous n'auront jamais
08:18donné à un oiseau d'assassinat d'Iphthro.
08:20Mais si vous en avez eu l'occasion,
08:23vous pouvez vous trouver...
08:28contre certaines difficultés,
08:32comme trouver les couilles des oiseaux fats,
08:34ce qu'il y a de mieux à faire
08:36que de se cacher dans leur nez et de crier tout le temps.
08:41Si vous ne pouvez pas résister à ces deux situations
08:43que j'ai démonstrées,
08:45alors la meilleure chose à utiliser
08:47est ce qu'on appelle le...
08:49coup de karaté.
08:51Et pour ce purpos,
08:53je vais prendre un oiseau ordinaire
08:55et l'enlever avec un seul coup
08:57de ma main.
09:03Aïe !
09:05Mon Dieu !
09:09Ces couilles doivent être faites d'encre !
09:12Je suis désolé que je sois en retard pour la lecture.
09:14Pas de problème.
09:16As-tu commencé sans moi ?
09:18J'ai eu plutôt un déjeuner lourd.
09:20J'avais ce gros oiseau restant et il pesait une tonne.
09:22Tu avais un oiseau restant ?
09:24Restant de quoi ?
09:26De la peinture.
09:28J'ai trouvé cette canne de peinture ce matin,
09:30donc j'ai pensé que j'allais donner tous mes os
09:32une peinture pour les déguiser.
09:34Tu ne sais jamais qui tu es
09:36et c'est mieux d'être en sécurité que d'être désolé.
09:38Ça a fonctionné très bien aussi.
09:40Ils ressemblent à des oiseaux.
09:42Je me dis, pourquoi tout le monde me regarde comme ça ?
09:44Il peut bien demander,
09:46dit Vassler.
09:48Démonstrations !
09:50Ennuyé, M. Runyon.
09:52Je vais donner une moi-même.
09:54Une petite démonstration
09:56intitulée Comment Arrêter un Chien
09:58Une petite démonstration
10:00intitulée Comment Arrêter un Chien
10:02Une petite démonstration
10:04intitulée Comment Arrêter un Chien
10:28Oh...
10:30Oh...
10:32I feel like a wet week today,
10:34I feel like a wet week today,
10:36said Vassler.
10:38Not a wink of sleep all night.
10:40That's the trouble
10:42with having an active mind,
10:44I suppose.
10:46I shall go and see Dill.
10:48Do not disturb.
10:50Do not disturb.
10:52Do not disturb.
10:54Do not disturb.
10:56It's all right for some.
10:58Listen to him.
11:02I'll soon
11:04fix that.
11:06Wakey, wakey !
11:08Hello, said Dill.
11:10I say,
11:12what a lovely morning.
11:14I was just thinking about going for a short stroll
11:16in my nightcap.
11:18You mean a long walk in your sleep,
11:20don't you ? I heard you
11:22snoring away.
11:24Snoring ? I don't snore.
11:26It was either that
11:28or we're in for a bad
11:30thunderstorm.
11:32I know I don't snore.
11:34I stayed awake one night to find out,
11:36and I didn't once.
11:38Still, I must admit there's nothing like a good sleep.
11:40I wish you'd tell me
11:42your secret.
11:44There's no secret. I just close my eyes and...
11:48He's off again.
11:50Come on, wake up !
11:54I was only demonstrating, said Dill.
11:56Have you tried counting bones ?
11:58If I tried counting
12:00your bones, I'd be up
12:02all night.
12:04How about hypnotism then ?
12:06That's jolly good too.
12:08You pick an object and you stare at it.
12:10And then, gradually,
12:12your eyelids get heavier
12:14and heavier
12:16until you...
12:18Isn't that typical ?
12:20Who else can I ask ?
12:22Sage ?
12:26Perhaps not.
12:28I wonder if Mr. Onion can help.
12:32Now, sleep,
12:34as we all know,
12:36is a matter not only of lying down
12:38and closing your lids,
12:40eyes for the use of,
12:42but you also have to tell yourself
12:44what you are going to do.
12:46Otherwise, your brain
12:48may well think it's got dark, Sutton,
12:50and wonder why.
12:52It's a matter of mind
12:54over a mattress.
12:56You have to say to yourself,
12:58I am going to sleep.
13:00Understood ?
13:02Now, I want you to take
13:04the recumbent or lying down position
13:06as shown on the board
13:08and await my word of command.
13:12I hope he knows what he's doing.
13:14Right.
13:16Go to sleep.
13:18One paw.
13:20Two paws.
13:22Snore.
13:32Doesn't it make you sick ?
13:34I'm going.
13:36There's only one thing worse
13:38than not being able to get to sleep.
13:40That's not being able to
13:42when everyone else is snoring.
13:44On the other paw.
13:48I must say,
13:50all this fresh air
13:52and running about
13:54has made me feel a bit...
13:58Excuse me.
14:00I hope you don't mind.
14:06I say, wake up !
14:08Right, dear.
14:10Wake up ! I just had this great idea
14:12for sending you to sleep.
14:14It came to me just now in a dream.
14:16A miniature sheep.
14:18A miniature sheep.
14:20It's quite easy, said Dill.
14:22You simply try counting them
14:24jumping over a stile.
14:26One miniature wide awake,
14:28the next miniature fast asleep.
14:32A miniature sheep.
14:34I was in the middle of such a nice dream, too.
14:38I'll never drop off now.
14:40I know I shan't.
14:46I'll never drop off now.
15:16A miniature sheep.
15:18A miniature sheep.
15:20A miniature sheep.
15:22A miniature sheep.
15:24A miniature sheep.
15:26A miniature sheep.
15:28A miniature sheep.
15:30A miniature sheep.
15:32A miniature sheep.
15:34A miniature sheep.
15:36A miniature sheep.
15:38A miniature sheep.
15:40A miniature sheep.
15:42A miniature sheep.
15:44A miniature sheep.
15:46A miniature sheep.
15:48A miniature sheep.
15:50A miniature sheep.
15:52A miniature sheep.
15:54A miniature sheep.
15:56A miniature sheep.
15:58A miniature sheep.
16:00A miniature sheep.
16:02A miniature sheep.
16:04A miniature sheep.
16:06A miniature sheep.
16:08A miniature sheep.
16:10A miniature sheep.
16:12A miniature sheep.
16:14A miniature sheep.
16:16A miniature sheep.
16:18A miniature sheep.
16:20A miniature sheep.
16:22A miniature sheep.
16:24A miniature sheep.
16:26A miniature sheep.
16:28A miniature sheep.
16:30A miniature sheep.
16:32A miniature sheep.
16:34A miniature sheep.
16:36A miniature sheep.
16:38A miniature sheep.
16:40A miniature sheep.
16:42A miniature sheep.
16:44A miniature sheep.
16:46A miniature sheep.
16:48A miniature sheep.
16:50A miniature sheep.
16:52A miniature sheep.
16:54A miniature sheep.
16:56A miniature sheep.
16:58A miniature sheep.
17:00A miniature sheep.
17:02A miniature sheep.
17:04A miniature sheep.
17:06A miniature sheep.
17:08A miniature sheep.
17:10A miniature sheep.
17:12A miniature sheep.
17:14A miniature sheep.
17:16A miniature sheep.
17:18A miniature sheep.
17:20A miniature sheep.
17:22A miniature sheep.
17:24A miniature sheep.
17:26A miniature sheep.
17:28A miniature sheep.
17:30A miniature sheep.
17:32A miniature sheep.
17:34A miniature sheep.
17:36A miniature sheep.
17:38A miniature sheep.
17:40A miniature sheep.
17:42A miniature sheep.
17:44A miniature sheep.
17:46A miniature sheep.
17:48A miniature sheep.
17:50A miniature sheep.
17:52A miniature sheep.
17:54A miniature sheep.
17:56A miniature sheep.
17:58A miniature sheep.
18:00A miniature sheep.
18:02A miniature sheep.
18:04A miniature sheep.
18:06A miniature sheep.
18:08A miniature sheep.
18:10A miniature sheep.
18:12A miniature sheep.
18:14A miniature sheep.
18:16A miniature sheep.
18:18A miniature sheep.
18:20A miniature sheep.
18:22A miniature sheep.
18:24A miniature sheep.
18:26A miniature sheep.
18:28A miniature sheep.
18:30A miniature sheep.
18:32Isn't it amazing?
18:34All it needs is two words.
18:38Ready?
18:40Ready.
18:42Go!
18:48That's another thing I forgot to mention,
18:50said Dill.
18:52You know that knob on top of the gear lever?
18:54The one that says forward and reverse?
18:56You mean this one?
18:58If it's on the wrong way around.
19:00I'll tell you something else.
19:02Cars bring out the worst in people.
19:04Cars bring out the worst in people.
19:06Oh, do they really?
19:08Fancy that.
19:10Yes, said Parsley.
19:12Normally quiet, inoffensive lions,
19:14normally quiet, inoffensive lions,
19:16for instance,
19:18they go right off, dogs.
19:20Goodnight, everyone.
19:22Happy motoring.
19:30***
19:31****
19:49One day, Parsley was out for a walk
19:51in the herb garden when he heard
19:53a strange humming sound,
19:55coming from the direction of Dill's kennel.
19:57He's either caught a very large bumblebee,
19:59Oh, il a mangé trop de poissons.
20:01Il vaut mieux aller voir ce que c'est.
20:09Ah, bonjour, dit-il. Comment allez-vous?
20:12Je vous prie pardon, dit-il.
20:15Comment allez-vous? Si vous ne le savez pas, personne d'autre le saura.
20:18Qu'est-ce que c'est que ce truc que vous avez sur votre tête?
20:21Ce truc apparaît être un vrai blackberry.
20:25Hmm, il me ressemble plus à un blackberry.
20:29J'avais raison. Je savais que ça allait se passer un jour.
20:32C'est tous ces poissons. Ils sont solides dans sa tête.
20:35Là, là, dit-il.
20:38Pas là, là. La, la.
20:41Bien sûr. La, la.
20:43En fait, tra-la-la.
20:45Je devrais l'humourer. Vous ne le saurez jamais. Il pourrait devenir dégueulasse.
20:49Est-ce que vous avez terminé, dit-il?
20:52Écoutez ça.
20:54L'homme qui ouvre la fenêtre est mon oncle.
21:19Naturellement.
21:25Je devrais le dire aux autres.
21:27Je pense peut-être que je devrais m'en aller, dit Parsley casualement.
21:31Au revoir, dit Dill.
21:33Bonne chance.
21:39Dit Parsley.
21:40Très triste.
21:41T'es tellement jeune, toi aussi.
21:44Oh, Dill a l'air drôle dans sa tête, dit Bayleef.
21:47Oh mon dieu. Je suis désolé d'entendre ça.
21:51Il parle toujours le double dutch, dit Parsley.
21:54Chaque mot d'autre.
21:56Chaque mot d'autre, double dutch.
21:59Et il a un truc drôle en noir sur sa tête.
22:02Un truc drôle en noir sur sa tête.
22:06Il n'y a pas deux façons. Il doit rester dehors un jour ou deux.
22:09La chose est, est-ce qu'on va l'emmener là-bas s'il ne veut pas y aller?
22:13Laisse-le à moi, dit le constable d'Apwee.
22:16Oui, il a des moyens et des façons de gérer des situations comme celle-ci.
22:19Je vais utiliser le subterfuge.
22:22Pauvre Dill. Il n'aura pas aimé ça.
22:25Il n'aura pas aimé ça du tout.
22:27Il vaut mieux que j'amène ma barre, juste en cas.
22:32Bonne matinée, Dill.
22:33Enchanté, monsieur Langean.
22:35Asseyez-vous, je vous en prie.
22:37Merci, dit Parsley.
22:39C'est ça encore?
22:40Oh, c'est encore pire que ce que tu as dit.
22:42C'est plus comme le double dutch.
22:45Laisse-le à moi.
22:46Maintenant, jeune Dill, si je devais vous mentionner le mot « bon »
22:49que diriez-vous?
22:51« Wouf, wouf », dit Dill.
22:53C'est un bon signe. Il n'a pas perdu toutes ses facultés.
22:56Maintenant, si je devais vous dire qu'il y avait un grand « vous savez quoi »
23:01à l'intérieur de votre canneau, que feriez-vous?
23:06Je pense que je peux dire, avec toute modérité, que c'est fait le truc.
23:11Vite, je vais mettre mon barreau contre sa porte.
23:14Ça va l'empêcher d'en sortir.
23:16Bonne idée, monsieur Bailey. Je vais mettre le tableau là aussi.
23:19Donnez-moi une main, Parsley.
23:21Je n'ai pas pu voir aucun « vous savez quoi ».
23:24J'ai regardé partout. Je vois. Qu'est-ce qui se passe?
23:27Ici, d'où venez-vous? Comment sortez-vous?
23:30J'ai mes méthodes, dit Dill.
23:32Que faites-vous avec mon tableau?
23:34Faites attention avec mon livre français.
23:36Votre quoi?
23:37exclama Parsley.
23:38Mon livre français. J'apprends son cours de correspondance.
23:41C'est très bien. J'arrive à l'étape « une » déjà.
23:44Que voulez-vous apprendre le français pour, jeune Dill?
23:47Détruire la paix comme ça?
23:49Je me prépare pour le marché commun.
23:52Faites attention, c'est mon mot.
23:54J'ai l'intention de construire un cannel dans le sud de la France un jour.
23:57Un cannel dans le sud de la France?
24:00Je ne sais pas pour vous, mais je suis un peu inquiet pour l'ancien Entente Cordiale.
24:04Je devrais le boire pendant que vous avez la chance.
24:06Vous pouvez m'en boire aussi.
24:08C'est du travail épuisant d'apprendre le français.
24:10Bonne nuit, tout le monde.
24:12Bonne nuit, dit Parsley.
24:37Aujourd'hui, dit Parsley,
24:39me sent comme un beau jour restant.
24:42Dès que M. Onions arrête de sonner la cloche de l'école,
24:46je vais m'asseoir et...
24:50rien faire.
24:52Merci.
24:53Je suis content que je n'aie pas à aller à l'école.
24:55Je ne me sens pas du tout scolastique aujourd'hui.
24:59As-tu entendu?
25:00Gaspedou.
25:01As-tu entendu?
25:02M. Onions s'occupe aujourd'hui de son examen
25:05et il offre un prix à celui qui a les meilleures réponses.
25:08J'ai mis nos deux noms en bas.
25:10Quoi?
25:11Oh, je savais que c'était trop paisible pour finir.
25:14Allez, on ne doit pas être en retard.
25:16On ne veut pas commencer avec un marque noire.
25:20Combien de K est-il dans Scola?
25:22Si je gagne, on partage, s'il te plaît.
25:25Je l'accepterai, s'il gagne.
25:27C'est parti pour l'examen.
25:29Commencez.
25:30Un pour, deux pour, trois.
25:33Maintenant, Mme Parsley et Bill ont concédé
25:37de participer à l'examen de cette année,
25:39les écrivains pour l'ESOL,
25:41pour lequel je vous offre un prix très cher.
25:44Je pense que l'école est la chose la plus gentille.
25:47Pouvons-nous avoir des comptes, s'il vous plaît?
25:49Crouler.
25:51Crouler.
25:52Crouler.
25:53Crouler.
25:54Crouler.
25:55Crouler.
25:56Crouler.
25:57Crouler.
25:58Crouler.
25:59Crouler.
26:00Crouler.
26:01Crouler.
26:02Crouler.
26:03Crouler.
26:04Crouler.
26:05Crouler.
26:06Crouler.
26:07Crouler.
26:08Crouler.
26:09Crouler.
26:10Crouler.
26:11Crouler.
26:12Crouler.
26:13Crouler.
26:14Crouler.
26:15Crouler.
26:16Crouler.
26:17Crouler.
26:18Crouler.
26:19Crouler.
26:20Crouler.
26:21Crouler.
26:22Crouler.
26:23Crouler.
26:24Crouler.
26:25Right, good lad. Now, if I cut it in half, then I cut the two halves in half again, and then cut these pieces in half, what would I have?
26:33Potato salad.
26:34Nice to do.
26:35Potato salad? Huh! Anyone else? Parsley.
26:40Um, I ought to know. Um, potatoes. Two from four is, uh, carry one. Hmm. It's a long time since I ate.
26:52Eight is the correct answer. Good. That's one mark to Parsley.
26:57Would you believe it? Of all the luck.
27:00We will now turn to English literature, Bards for the use of. Now, if Shakespeare were alive today, what would he be famous for?
27:09His age? Asked Parsley.
27:11Wrong. You?
27:13Uh, Shakespeare, I know the name. It would be on the tip of my tongue if I had a big enough tongue. I'm just trying to place.
27:23Correct. His plays, of course. One mark to do.
27:27Now who's talking? I've told you before, dogs who live in glass kennels shouldn't throw bones.
27:35We come now to the subject of natural history, birds and bees for the use of. Can anyone tell me what grows on all trees? Dill?
27:43I don't know, said Dill sadly.
27:46Bark, said Mr. Onion.
27:48Bark!
27:49Woof woof.
27:50Woof woof, said Parsley.
27:52Really?
27:53It could have been right, replied Dill. There's many a true word spoken in wolves.
27:58There are other meanings to the word bark.
28:02Bark is the correct answer. We've a good lad here.
28:05That gives Parsley another mark, making him the winner by a wide margin of two to one.
28:10Congratulations. I wonder when you'll get our prize. May I eat my share now?
28:16Our prize?
28:18I did offer to go shares if I won it, said Dill.
28:21The prize for the best exam result is a chit. Scholars for the use of. Entitling the owner to a day off from school.
28:28A day off from school? I don't even go to school.
28:32You'd better start soon, said Dill. It won't be worth winning otherwise.
28:36Dogs. Exams, he said. Go shares on the prize, he said.
28:42We all have our woof days. Don't forget to be up early tomorrow. You've got a day off.
28:47We've got half a day off each, said Parsley. We're going shares, remember?
28:54Bags, you go first then, said Dill. I could do with a lie-in.
28:58Bags, I say good night, exclaimed Parsley. Good night.
29:25One day, Parsley was out for a walk when he heard a very strange noise.
29:29I believe for every drop of rain that falls, some dog gets wet.
29:37That sounds like the cry of the lesser-spotted Dill, coming from the theatre.
29:43I threw a custard in her face.
29:50Shall I? asked Parsley.
29:53I suppose I'd better. Curtains!
29:58Friends, Romans, herb-dwellers, I come to eat my bones, not to bury them.
30:05What on earth's going on?
30:07Shh! I'm busy rehearsing my one-dog show.
30:11I didn't know you were a thespian.
30:14There's no need to call me names. You wait. I may go on tour.
30:19Rome, Paris, New York, Slough.
30:23When do you leave?
30:25As soon as I've given my act a final polish. I'm hoping to appeal to all tastes, even yours.
30:31For instance?
30:33Sawing an owl in half.
30:35This I must see.
30:37Curtains!
30:40Cigarettes, chocolates, ices, bones.
30:44I've heard of one-dog shows, but this is ridiculous.
30:50That sounds like Sage. I think I'd better get back.
30:53There's no holding them ever since they joined the Union.
30:56They? asked Parsley.
30:58This isn't the first time I've sawn owls in half.
31:01Gone! And I didn't even have time for a choc-ice.
31:07Do it! Do it! cried Sage.
31:13I hope he knows what he's doing.
31:16Do it! Do it!
31:18It sounds as though he's cut off his two wounds.
31:23What did you think of that?
31:25What did I think of it? I didn't even see it.
31:28You ask me, it wasn't Sage at all.
31:31I do do impressions. Would you like to hear some?
31:34I'll try anything once, said Parsley.
31:38Right. For my first impression, I would like to give you Mr. Bailey.
31:44Oh! Ah! Very good. A bit short on material, but very good.
31:51I can do longer ones. I'll show you Mr. Onion, if you like.
31:56I will not tell you a joke. Ribs for the tickly knob.
32:00Oh, I like that one. That was Mr. Onion to a T.
32:03I haven't finished yet.
32:05There was this man what was teaching a parrot to talk.
32:08My name's Polly, he said. My name's Polly.
32:12That's Polly, said the parrot. So's my.
32:16You know, this boy's got talent. He certainly knows his onions.
32:21I'll do some quick-fire ones now.
32:23Don't blink too much or you may miss them.
32:26Darcy! Darcy!
32:29Come in, Rosemary. Come in. Just want to find Dil.
32:34Woof, woof!
32:36Never mind Dil. I want to call a meeting of Bailey, Mr. Onion,
32:40Pashana Betty, and Constable Nathweeds.
32:43Right-o, Rosemary.
32:46Oh! Ah! Lady Rosemary.
32:49Come in, Lady Rosemary. My number's one paws, two paws, three.
32:54I'll be right with you, Lady Rosemary. Very quickly, very soon.
32:58What's going on here?
33:00There's been a bad attack of app-borrowing in the herb garden,
33:03and I want to know the reason why.
33:05Oh, very good. Bravo! That's the best so far.
33:09I didn't even see your lips move.
33:11That is because it happens to be the real thing.
33:14Where is he? I'll have him. Where's he got to?
33:17I think he may have gone on a quick tour. He said he might.
33:21Pity, really. He could have become one of the world's great tragedians.
33:25The word is tragedies, and he's that already.
33:29Mind you, I must say, once you get up on a stage...
33:33Gladys, oh, Gladys, you ravishing thing.
33:41Oh, dear. Now he's at it. The only song he knows.
33:45I think I'll do my act, the disappearing one.
33:49Good night, everyone. One, two, three.
34:04I'd rather feel today's a motor ring day
34:09With little delay I'll be on my way
34:13I feel like a drive today Sir Parsley
34:16A nice long drive in the country
34:19I'll have a nice long drive in the country
34:23I'll have a nice long drive in the country
34:27I'll have a nice long drive in the country
34:32in the country. Oh, there's nothing like it, you know. The feel of the wind ruffling your
34:37whiskers, the soft purr of the engine as it springs to life. That's very strange. I'd
34:47better consult my book. I wonder if it's under B for breakdowns, C for cars, or L for lifts.
34:56Ah, here we are. Breakdowns. If your car breaks down, why not try Dill's Garage, day and
35:07night service, no job too small, bonus stamps given, if he writes in my book just once
35:16more. Oh, well, there's nothing for it, I suppose. I've heard of horsepower, but this
35:25is ridiculous. If I'd known motoring was going to be this hard, I would never have taken
35:31it up. Hello, have you got a puncture? Don't worry, I'll soon have it fixed. Look, I haven't
35:44got a puncture. You have now. I can see I'm going to regret this. The trouble happens
35:54to be in the engine. Let me have a listen. I'm good at engines. What I don't know about
35:59engines would fill a book. It sounds all right to me. I don't think I've ever heard a quieter
36:05one. That, said Parsons, is because it isn't going. Could you try turning the starting
36:12handle for a moment? There are a couple of loose wires here. I'll just try tying them
36:18together and see what happens. Ah, I see you've got the latest optional extra,
36:26lion-assisted hoods. They're all the rage. I shall be in a rage soon if I don't get my car fixed.
36:37Careful, said Dew, that might have landed on someone's paw. Have you seen my spanner anywhere?
36:45If I had, I wouldn't let you within a mile of it. You're bad enough with paws, let alone a spanner.
36:52Well, it must be somewhere. Here, hold this a moment, will you? I'll just have another look
36:57underneath. I've only been here two minutes and look at it. Hello, hello, hello, what's going on here?
37:05It's what's coming off that bothers me. Coming off or going on makes no difference.
37:10This heap of junk is in the way and I want to see it move. It's in an unroadworthy condition.
37:18You must be joking. It isn't even in a footpath worthy condition. I'll say one thing though,
37:25it's got good springs. Just look at that. Hey, they knew how to make cars in those days.
37:32Those springs are in my head. It's going up and down like a yo-yo. Well, I've said it once
37:39and I'm not saying it again. Either this gets moved or there'll be a few names going down in
37:44my notebook, beginning with the Ps. I'd better be going too. Cheerio, see you tomorrow. Come back.
37:53You got me into this mess, now you get me out. I'm sorry, it's early closing day today.
38:00Oh, by the way, you won't want this old can, will you? Old can? What old can?
38:08I found it under the car. It pongs a bit, but I'll give it a good clean-out.
38:13It'll do to keep my bone reserves in. This old can happens to be my petrol tank
38:21and it's empty. No wonder my car wouldn't go. Fancy taking it to bits just to find that out.
38:28I'm not infallible, said Dew. I said I was wrong once and I was proved right. Besides,
38:34every dog has his woof day. It's yours today, all right. Anybody want to buy a kit of parts for the car?
39:05There's only one thing Parsley likes better than an hour's nap after lunch,
39:10and that's two hours. The trouble is, the herb garden isn't always as peaceful as it might be.
39:18Especially if bay leaf happens to be cutting the grass.
39:24And if it isn't lawnmowers, it's whistles.
39:29If Constable Knappweed caught a criminal every time he blew his whistle,
39:32there'd be nowhere to put them all. But worst of all is when Sage is in one of his chirpy moods.
39:40It doesn't happen often, but when it does, nobody gets any sleep.
39:49On days like that, even Dill isn't much help.
39:52OUCH! cried Parsley.
39:55OUCH!
39:57OUCH!
39:59What's up? asked Dill.
40:01I've just trodden on something sharp.
40:05Oh, I expect it was my tin tacks. I sometimes put them down to keep away the wolves.
40:12Wolves? said Parsley.
40:14There aren't any wolves in the herb garden.
40:17There you are, said Dill. It shows how well they work.
40:22It's no good, said Parsley.
40:24I shall either have to join the Noise Abatement Society or consult my book.
40:33Needles. Noddles.
40:36Ah, noises.
40:38Noises can be caused by lawnmowers, policemen blowing whistles, and owls chirping.
40:45It's absolutely right, you know.
40:48These noises are often made because people have nothing better to do.
40:52Why not try giving them an endurance test?
40:57Good gracious!
40:58I suppose it's worth a go.
41:03Anything is better than this.
41:10Oh, yes!
41:12Oh, yes! called Parsley.
41:15Hear ye! Hear ye!
41:18Get your entry forms here for the grand endurance test.
41:24There will be a prize for whosoever does whatsoever for longer than ever.
41:31Oh, yes! Oh, yes!
41:34An endurance test? said Bailey.
41:37Oh, I got just the idea for that, I have.
41:41I'll be going to mow this patch of grass, I see.
41:49I'll be going to mow it longer and faster than anyone ever has before.
41:57Darn if I don't reach Australia before I've finished.
42:01Great, said Parsley.
42:04An endurance test? said Constable Atweed.
42:07Whosoever does whatsoever for longer than ever.
42:11Oh, well now, that's easy.
42:14There's no problem there.
42:20Here, don't say my bee's gone soggy.
42:25Marvellous! said Parsley.
42:28An endurance test? hooted Sage.
42:31Toot! Toot!
42:33There's no one who can toot, to whistle louder and longer than I can.
42:43That, said Parsley, is what happens to owls who whistle, to wit, too much.
42:55And what, said Parsley, is going on here?
42:59Don't tell me you've been sleeping through it all?
43:02Certainly not, said Dill.
43:04I'm going in for the world's...
43:06snoring record.
43:08The world's...
43:09snoring record?
43:11That's right, I'm quietly confident.
43:13snoring
43:17Doesn't sound very quiet to me, said Parsley.
43:21Oh, I've been doing it for five minutes already, said Dill.
43:24Do you think I've won first prize?
43:26No, said Parsley.
43:28But move over.
43:30We'll go shares, if you like.
43:32If you ask me, my endurance has been tested as much as anyone today.
43:59Today, said Parsley, feels like a...
44:03It feels like a...
44:05day.
44:07I definitely feel very...
44:09today.
44:11I'd better consult my book.
44:13Oh!
44:15My head.
44:17I wish it wouldn't do that.
44:19R for mole.
44:21T for tool.
44:23U for...
44:25Do you suffer from headaches?
44:28Do you get spots before the eyes?
44:32Does it hurt when you nod?
44:34Oh!
44:36It certainly does.
44:38Then you are probably sickening for something.
44:40Try going to bed.
44:42If that doesn't work,
44:44call the doctor.
44:46Bed?
44:48Now that sounds a good idea.
44:50I must say, this book always hits the nail right on the head.
44:52Oh!
44:54Good night, everyone.
44:57Oh!
44:59Pleasant dreams.
45:26Now I'm glad you came to see me,
45:28said Baileys.
45:30What you need is a nice glass of thistle juice.
45:32It's the best thing out.
45:34Nature's cure.
45:36It's good for giddiness,
45:38tatters, the plague, the itch.
45:40Why?
45:42They said it even strengthens the memory.
45:44Now where'd I put the blessed stuff?
45:46It's enough to give you the tatter.
45:48I think he'd better have a double dose himself
45:50when he finds it.
45:52I wonder if Sage can help.
45:54Anyone home?
45:56Wakey, wakey!
46:00What's up? What's up?
46:02I've got this eww feeling
46:04all over.
46:06Have you woken me up just to wait to tell me that?
46:10I'm going back to sleep.
46:14I suppose I could try Dill.
46:16After all, he can't be worse than
46:18good gracious
46:20Dr. Dill, bone specialist.
46:22Lions over hauls.
46:24Operations while you wait.
46:26Bone tools.
46:28He must have second sight.
46:30Either that or he knew
46:32I was going to feel eww.
46:36Good afternoon.
46:38Have you come to enroll as a bone donor?
46:40I'll give you a form.
46:42A bone donor?
46:44Don't you mean a blood donor?
46:46I know what I mean, said Dill.
46:48Well, I haven't.
46:50It's just that I've had this
46:52eww feeling ever since I got up.
46:56Say wing wing.
46:58Wing wing.
47:00Again.
47:02Wing wing.
47:04Once more.
47:06Wing wing.
47:08I think the phone's ringing.
47:10Why don't you answer it?
47:12Look, this is no time for jokes.
47:14I like to get my patients into a good mood
47:16before they get the bill.
47:18I'm not in this business for my health.
47:20Besides, you get three weeks at my
47:22special convalescent home,
47:24Dillwater Towers.
47:26That'll set you back a tidy sum.
47:28Then there's all the bone soup.
47:30I didn't know being ill was so expensive.
47:32It's not being ill that costs the money.
47:34It's getting well again.
47:36Now, for my first encore,
47:38I think I'll start with a hyporectomy
47:40of the lower whatchamacallit.
47:42You can call it what you like.
47:44You're not touching me.
47:46I'll just get my instruction book.
47:48Wait till I'm awake.
47:50I'll... I'll...
47:52I do hate these dreams
47:54where you can't wake up.
48:00Are you all right?
48:02You've been jumping up and down
48:04like a jack-in-the-box.
48:06I had this nasty dream
48:08all about you.
48:10I started off with an ugh feeling.
48:12An ugh feeling?
48:14Can I interest you in one of my cut-price
48:16ugh cures?
48:18This is where I came in.
48:20Good night, everyone.
48:22I think I'm about to have a relax.
48:44...
48:46...
48:48...
48:50...
48:52...
48:54...
48:56...
48:58...
49:00...
49:02...
49:04...
49:06...
49:08...
49:10...
49:12...
49:14...