The Braxtons S 1 EP 1
The Braxtons S 1 EP 1
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00:00We've got Trina and makeup Tony's here to want is on the way
00:15You good you ready for today? Oh, I'm getting ready emotionally. Yeah, I'm getting made up for it, but emotionally, uh, we'll see
00:25Are you good? Yeah, I'm in a good space
00:30Tamar's in a route
00:32It's easy kitchen she's gonna be cooking we should be shooting in about 20 minutes the Braxton's
00:40The Braxton's are bad guys
00:44Look at God
00:46All right, let's get last look since so we can get this going. Let's get this party started. This is my first green screen
00:52What's the black on it? What's the background gonna be?
00:57In the back
01:00It's been a long time coming. We've dealt with a lot and so we have a lot to share
01:05Matter of fact the Braxton's never should have gone away. How about that? Wouldn't you agree?
01:15Yeah, baby now the time I think that the Braxton's remind every family of themselves in some aspect
01:24But there's the music aspect
01:30Let's watch these that's why she's bitches honey when you love ready for me. Let me know. Oh you try. Okay. I'm standing
01:38Whether you're getting along whether you're not getting along
01:46The clicks that's within the families it somehow reminds you of your own
01:52With our family there's always an opportunity for things to go left. I'm just really excited that things are going, right?
02:00Oh
02:03You know, I'm glad that we're back but the other part of it is I know that we have a missing piece that is never
02:08Gonna be the same without her
02:10This week is
02:12the second anniversary of Tracy's passing Tracy wouldn't everybody know that she was a fighter and
02:17That you know, her illness was not going to
02:21Break her spirit. She was gonna always remain the Tracy that we all knew her to be
02:30I
02:32See may not be here physically, but her spirit and her energy will always be here
02:42She called me she said mom I have catch
02:48Yeah, so helpless I couldn't do anything to save her I feel like we need to have some type of support
02:55That grief man is weak management or okay
03:00Had the echo done. I had the EKG had blood work done. What's wrong with their heart?
03:10I am who I am you accept me or you just don't accept me. It's just a part of who I am
03:14I have alopecia. That's just it
03:17We're just calling to check in on you. So you feel inside you're doing
03:20I don't want him to go into a downward spiral. We need to go ahead and go and recounseling
03:25I
03:27Tell me what do you feel like you need help with I don't think I'm ready. I have no idea what to expect
03:36Any idea for what may need to happen tonight in order to make sure that it stays in a positive direction
03:55I
03:57I
04:16Come on
04:19You two have a great day, what is that you're making these 20 so I am hungry I'm happy for today Oh shocker
04:27Are you putting all that cheese in there?
04:29Uh, no. Not unless you want to stay in the bathroom for the next couple of days.
04:32Yeah, I'm good.
04:34When's that going to be done?
04:35In a few minutes.
04:36What are we going to eat with it?
04:37Chips.
04:38That's it?
04:39It's dip.
04:41Any broccoli?
04:45Vaughn and I have been married for almost five years now,
04:47and our blended family has blended together quite beautifully,
04:51and I'm still so much in love with Vaughn.
04:53It's like the first day that I married him.
04:57Pause.
04:58Walk all the way up, and then let it go.
05:00Yeah.
05:02Now spread out.
05:05I got you, I got you, I got you.
05:08I got you.
05:09She slipped.
05:10I did.
05:11I knew my pants was too long.
05:12I couldn't hold my pants up and hold Gina's dress up at the same time.
05:17It was either her or me.
05:20She ain't drink nothing.
05:20Watch your boot, watch your boot.
05:22Watch your boot.
05:23How are you feeling about the show coming back?
05:25I'm a little leery.
05:27It's been three years now since we've last done the show,
05:30and then ever since everything happened, even with Tracy,
05:33I would have thought that maybe, you know,
05:35it would have brought everybody to a different place where we're closer and things like that,
05:39but that's not what happened here.
05:41And I just wonder how that's going to be actually working together again,
05:44because we haven't really done any kind of work together,
05:48not collaboratively, and that worries me.
05:52That worries me.
05:54I won't say that my sisters and I have become estranged since Tracy's passing.
05:58I feel like no one really wanted to address it and talk about it.
06:02So my feelings were enclosed.
06:04They were put in a box.
06:05And especially for me, that was unhealthy.
06:08I should have had my sisters to lean on to be those people for me to talk to,
06:12but it just didn't feel like that's what they wanted for themselves.
06:17You know, we're supposed to be going to dinner with Tony and the girls tonight.
06:20Well, not you.
06:20Who is we?
06:21But me and Tawanda and Tamar and Mommy.
06:25Nice.
06:25Y'all need some time together.
06:27I'm really glad that Tony is in town for a couple of days because we never see each other, OK?
06:32Tonight will be a good check-in to see how everyone's doing,
06:35especially as we get close to the two-year anniversary of Tracy's passing.
06:39Mommy's been pushing for us to talk to a grief counselor together,
06:42but we haven't decided if we're ready to do that yet.
06:45We're going to talk about, you know, Tracy.
06:49We never really sat and talked about it as a family ever since,
06:53you know, we had her memorial service.
06:55Yeah. How are you feeling?
06:57You know, it's been difficult. It's been difficult.
06:59Grieving is a very real thing.
07:01You know what I mean?
07:02And that's why it's so important for us to stay in contact with baby Kevin, with little Kevin.
07:07Little Kevin is not just Tracy's son.
07:09He's our only child.
07:11They had the deepest bond in the whole entire world.
07:14Hey, Kevin!
07:16I think the loss of Tracy for little Kevin
07:20was one of the most detrimental things he's ever been through in his life.
07:24And we need to make sure he knows that just because he lost his mother, he isn't alone.
07:28The dude lost his mom very early in life.
07:30But he doesn't speak to his dad as much either.
07:32What?
07:35I didn't know that.
07:36Not as often as I would think.
07:39I won't speak negatively about his dad because his dad was grieving too.
07:44No matter my personal opinion toward him, he's still a grieving husband.
07:48But when your surviving parent is shut down and the parent that you lost is gone,
07:53who do you have?
07:55It's almost a loss of both parents.
07:58I think we should check with him and see how he's doing.
08:00I just don't know.
08:01Situation was tough for everybody.
08:03Yeah.
08:05It was tough for everybody.
08:09But Tony said that she has something to say to us,
08:12but you just never know what it's going to be.
08:14I don't know.
08:15Tony, in true Tony fashion, asked the family to come to dinner
08:20and she had something to tell us.
08:21You know, but this time when she told us that she wanted to talk,
08:25the setting of her tone was very melancholy.
08:27And I'm really afraid because Tony has always been recluse when it comes to her feelings.
08:32She's never really been this person who just wants everybody to know what's going on with her.
08:36You know what?
08:38It don't matter what she wants to talk about.
08:40The fact of the matter is that all of y'all be together.
08:42Now, that I agree with.
08:48We've never truly grieved together since Tracy's passing because I don't think I'm ready.
08:53I haven't talked to anyone at all.
08:55He's just trying to live with a broken heart.
08:57It's just really messed up.
08:58I'm scared like every day and I can't even handle that feeling.
09:12Hey, everybody looks amazing.
09:28Nice.
09:29I would just like to say for the record, I'm not paying.
09:32Because y'all do this to me every time.
09:34Who's paying?
09:35Tawanda, she's late.
09:36This family dinner is the first time that everyone together filming again.
09:44It feels so good to have everyone in the same room.
09:51However, I'm missing Tracy.
09:53How's everybody been?
09:55I ain't seen everybody.
09:56I ain't seen or talked to you.
09:57Where you been?
09:58I've been working.
09:59I'm excited.
10:00I haven't worked in 15 months.
10:02These days, I'm a bit bicoastal between LA and Atlanta.
10:05But I've been staying in LA more lately since I've been rehearsing for my new Las Vegas show.
10:09It's Cedric the Entertainer.
10:11It's called Love and Laughter.
10:13And it's a variety show with singing and dancing and comedy, which is kind of new for me.
10:18But I'm getting more and more excited about the challenge of it all.
10:23You feel like you're ready?
10:24I'm a little nervous.
10:25Yesterday, I was like, I'm nervous.
10:27Cedric, I haven't performed this.
10:28I'm never nervous like this.
10:30So just anxiety.
10:31That's all.
10:32You got this.
10:33Yeah, you're fine.
10:34You got this.
10:34I actually had a Vegas show over 15 years ago in 2007.
10:37And while I was doing that show, I had chest pains.
10:43That's when I was diagnosed with lupus.
10:45And I was told then that I may never be able to perform again.
10:49I was scared to tell anyone.
10:51The truth is that I have lupus.
10:54What do you mean?
10:56I've been battling it for a while.
10:59And I don't want to tell anyone because everyone's like, oh, you can't tell anyone because you
11:02can't work.
11:02You don't want to tell anybody.
11:03Because it may defer people from wanting to work with you.
11:06Suddenly, now I'm tired of faking it.
11:11I'm a little scared because I haven't performed.
11:14But the doctor said 15 months.
11:16And it's exactly 15 months.
11:19I know I have to tell the girls about the health scare, which makes me feel some kind
11:22of way because the last health scare we heard was Tracy.
11:26My family know that a few months ago, I had to have a stent put in my heart, which was
11:32extremely scary.
11:34But I haven't told them the nitty gritty, the details of it, what really has happened.
11:39So I got to make sure, you know, I tell them without making them feel at ease, I should
11:44say.
11:45And it's not easy to talk about for myself.
11:47But on the brink of Tracy stuff, I don't want to get them riled up.
11:51Oh, it's only OK.
11:52So I don't even want to tell them.
11:54Maybe I shouldn't.
11:55I don't know.
11:56You look really good.
11:57I do.
11:58I can tell you've been over there in that California lifestyle.
12:00I'm over here in this Georgia lifestyle.
12:02I hate living in Lemon Pepper Island.
12:05You know what?
12:06What's Lemon Pepper Island?
12:08That's where I live at.
12:09Everything is lemon pepper.
12:10They probably got lemon pepper pedicures.
12:12It's lemon pepper everything.
12:14Lemon pepper and hookah, hookah, lemon, hookah, lemon, hookah.
12:18But we have guacamole.
12:20We eat avocado toast.
12:21I eat that.
12:23What about you?
12:24Is you single?
12:24What's the tea?
12:25Oh, that's a big tea.
12:27I feel like I'm single.
12:29I feel like I'm pretty much single.
12:31What's that mean, pretty much?
12:33I was engaged.
12:35I'm not married.
12:36I'm not engaged anymore, and I'm not married.
12:39And that's all I'm going to say.
12:40So you got a boyfriend?
12:43I'm focused on my two boys and my work.
12:45It's been a strange time since Tracy's passed,
12:48but I am happy in my life overall, just not
12:53in a place for a relationship.
12:55Just not in a place for a relationship.
12:59Right now.
13:01What are you checking?
13:02What are you doing?
13:03First love club?
13:04Under my eye.
13:05Oh, yeah.
13:12Y'all did this on purpose.
13:13Y'all went and no we did not.
13:15Oh my God.
13:16Why are you copying off of me?
13:18Nothing wrong with it.
13:19They did it on purpose.
13:20No we did not.
13:21I was, I didn't see Trina all day.
13:22All I want to know is.
13:24What new pussy cat?
13:26Y'all used to dress like this when y'all were young.
13:27I can't.
13:28I'm flabbergasted.
13:30Tracy is like 100% looking down, crack it up.
13:34I mean, I've been missing this.
13:36Whenever we get together, there's always this
13:38crazy and silly moments.
13:39And with Tracy, it was even crazier.
13:41She made everything fun.
13:42I have to pee right now.
13:44Don't pee, Tracy.
13:45This is the ocean.
13:46Don't pee, Tracy.
13:47I have to pee.
13:48Wait for a bathroom, Tracy.
13:50Where'd you get that big Bob Marley one?
13:59And I just don't see where it's like a seat's missing.
14:01It is.
14:02Tracy's holding out purses.
14:04Yeah.
14:05No, it's not exactly.
14:06I'm not holding everybody's purse.
14:08Everybody take they own.
14:09Here's your one.
14:10Here's your one.
14:11And here's your one.
14:13I hear all the time from our fans how they miss watching our antics.
14:20Oh, laughing with us.
14:37Whitney gonna get you.
14:38Have a seat.
14:40And crying with us.
14:41I don't wanna talk about that, man.
14:42It is the truth.
14:44And singing with us.
14:46She got four kids and that's enough.
15:14She don't want no more kids.
15:16And that's just tough.
15:18We don't like all of y'all.
15:24Happy birthday to you.
15:34Thank you, guys.
15:36When we were filming for your birthday in LA, she was telling me and Trina,
15:42she was like, I can't, it's hot.
15:44Oh, my God, it's hot.
15:46Oh, it burns.
15:48Oh, it burns.
15:50Can I get a kettle of water?
15:52Yeah, she was sad.
15:54When she finally went to the doctor.
15:56I was in LA.
15:58Yeah.
16:00And she called me.
16:02She said, Mommy, I have cancer.
16:04Help us.
16:06She said, but I'm gonna beat this.
16:08I said, I know you will.
16:10When Tracy got diagnosed, it didn't seem real at all.
16:12It still doesn't.
16:14For me, family is the most important thing in my life.
16:16I spent my whole life caring for and protecting my sisters.
16:18But this was different.
16:20There was nothing I could do.
16:22I felt so helpless.
16:24I couldn't do anything to save her.
16:26That's really hard for me to digest.
16:28Because I was the sick one.
16:30Not Tracy.
16:32Anyway, I'm sorry, guys.
16:34I just need a moment.
16:36Okay.
16:38Here we go.
16:40I can't mess up my makeup.
16:42You know,
16:44I feel like we need to have some type of support.
16:46So I'm just saying, like a grief management.
16:48Because that's a lot.
16:50It's a lot.
16:52It's a lot.
16:54It's a lot.
16:56It's a lot.
16:58It's a lot.
17:00It's a lot.
17:02You know what I'm saying?
17:04Everybody is dealing with it in their own way.
17:06But I think Trina really
17:08needs extensive counseling
17:10because she
17:12was there
17:14when Tracy
17:16took her last breath.
17:18Has anybody
17:20gone to grief counseling?
17:22I probably should have
17:24after Tracy.
17:26Yeah.
17:28I have before, but not at the Traceman.
17:30Probably should've.
17:31Yeah.
17:33Every time I see y'all necklace.
17:35Oh, yeah.
17:36I don't have mine on today, but I think of Trey.
17:39Tracey wanted us to wear it.
17:40She just, like, I want my sisters to all wear it.
17:43No, she said she want us to take her wherever we go.
17:49Tracey loved hummingbirds.
17:51There was a, just this whole murial on her back.
17:56It was five hummingbirds.
17:57So it represented every sister.
17:59Before she passed, she told us that she always wants us
18:03to take her with us so she can continue her journey.
18:07So wherever I go, whatever I'm doing, I take her with me.
18:11She's still here.
18:13She's still here.
18:14Now, the only time I ever take Tracey off
18:19is when I'm in a moment with my husband.
18:21I'm sure she doesn't wanna be there.
18:22Sorry, Tracey, but I'm sure you didn't wanna be there.
18:25How's little Kevin doing?
18:26He's going through some things, you know.
18:28He's going through a divorce, so.
18:31Wait, what happened?
18:32What happened?
18:33He told everybody what happened?
18:35What happened?
18:38I am taken aback that little Kevin
18:42is going through a divorce
18:43because I see little Kevin all the time.
18:45We have dinner and catch up and things like that,
18:48but he's never told me about his situations with my niece.
18:53Tracey would be sad about that, very sad.
18:56Has little Kevin done grief management?
18:58No, no, no.
19:00Loss of his mom, that's a lot.
19:02He's best friend.
19:05I heard that Kevin was getting a divorce
19:10and I know, I think of Tracey, that would break her heart
19:15because it's breaking mine, for God's sakes.
19:18She about to cry, what's wrong?
19:20You can't touch Trina when she's crying.
19:24As time go by, is this cheese?
19:26I'm touching it.
19:27I'm touching it on my face like that.
19:28That's right.
19:28That's right.
19:29That's right.
19:30Let's change the subject.
19:31I'd like to hear Tami's news.
19:35I went to the doctor.
19:41Here's to Tracey.
19:43I'm not above you.
19:43Plank, plank, plank, plank.
19:44I'm not below you.
19:45I'm not below you.
19:46I'm not below you.
19:47I'm not below you.
19:48I'm not below you.
19:48I'm not below you.
19:49I'm not below you.
19:51I'm right here with you.
19:52How are you guys feeling about being here tonight?
19:56What's going on?
19:57Y'all got so many secrets.
19:59I don't have any secrets.
19:59So irritating.
20:00Trina's going tapping and it's like,
20:01but this is not the forum.
20:02This is not the forum.
20:08I'd like to hear Tami's news.
20:13I went to the doctor.
20:15My heart was aching.
20:16It was like, I had had every test done.
20:18I had the echo done.
20:18I had the EKG.
20:19I had the blood work done.
20:20And I went to get the angio.
20:22And the doctor was like,
20:23no, that's your pre-op.
20:24So what do you mean my pre-op?
20:25No, you having surgery.
20:27You got to look inside your heart.
20:30What's wrong with your heart?
20:32If the heart attack had happened,
20:33they caught it just before it happened.
20:34If I had a heart attack, I wouldn't survive.
20:36I wouldn't be here right now.
20:39But it was something called the widow maker.
20:41They told me your sister was watching over you.
20:46Because you, by rights, should be dead today.
20:49You should not be alive today.
20:52I've always known Toni's health was serious.
20:56I didn't take it lightly.
20:58As a mother, I were.
21:01And I think she feels that
21:04if Tracy can leave now so soon,
21:09well, maybe me too.
21:15The thing that's really messed up,
21:18Dr. McGregor, I was told that
21:21even though I got the stent in,
21:23you will eventually need bypass surgery.
21:26Because if I have a heart attack, I won't survive.
21:30I had to have a stent put in my heart,
21:32which was extremely scary.
21:35That's a very scary procedure itself.
21:37But when my doctor told me
21:39I might not ever be able to do a tour again,
21:42okay, I heard it before.
21:44But this was different.
21:45They say you may never be able to do another tour
21:46because you could have a heart attack
21:48and it could kill you.
21:49It's like crazy anxieties.
21:50Like, you gotta think about it all the time.
21:54What's the matter with the stent and the diesel?
21:56Who do I take care of now?
21:59It's just really messed up.
22:00I'm scared, like every day.
22:02So if I have a heart attack, I won't survive.
22:04And I can't even handle it.
22:06Just because they say it doesn't make it true, you know?
22:08I'll offer you something, I'll offer you something.
22:11All I could think about were the boys.
22:14And I hate saying it out loud, even now,
22:16because it's real.
22:20It's real life.
22:22To be scared every day, every day,
22:24you can't even understand.
22:25Like, oh, is that heartburn or am I having a heart attack?
22:29The Bible says, speak things, although they are what?
22:32And so they were.
22:33And so it is.
22:35That's it.
22:36That's how that works.
22:37As a person's thing.
22:38As soon as you feel that that fear is coming in here,
22:41you demand it to leave and it will.
22:43That's just it.
22:44Did you point to my vagina?
22:45Yes, you demand it to leave and it will.
22:48No, if you don't use it.
22:49You don't use it, you'll lose it.
22:52Now that's a fact.
22:53Seeing my family rally around Tony
22:55with so much love and support
22:56reminded me of how many times we've hugged each other
23:00and loved on each other in the past.
23:02And it gives me hope that we can be as close
23:04as we used to be.
23:05And it might take time,
23:06but we always have Tracy with us, making us stronger.
23:10I needed this more than I wanted to admit to myself.
23:14And I honestly think we all did.
23:15Oh, you did fine, Tony.
23:16Yep.
23:17You're already okay.
23:18You're already good.
23:19You're already okay.
23:20For me, the main reason for wanting to do
23:24the Braxton's again is because of Tracy.
23:28She wanted us to do the show.
23:31She wanted us to talk about her cancer, her illness,
23:35in hopes that it would help someone else,
23:36maybe battling it.
23:40Whenever there's a loss, a death in the family,
23:42it can go either way.
23:44It can bring you closer or further apart.
23:45And I think this was her way of making sure
23:48we stay together.
23:53And it is so.
23:54Let me tell you something,
23:55you already live and you can't be afraid to live.
24:01I thought I was strong,
24:02but I wasn't strong enough to see it.
24:05And if somebody said Trina drinks too much,
24:06well, I'm sorry.
24:09That's what Trina needs right now.
24:12You know, I'm glad you guys are enemies.
24:18I can't take it.
24:20It's too much.
24:29Trina, don't leave me.
24:30You look adorable.
24:32So do you.
24:34I got you a drink and I got me a drink.
24:35All right, but after today, I'm going on hiatus.
24:37So, why?
24:38Because I need my stomach to be full.
24:41That's how Steve uncle.
24:44Umba and I have always been super close.
24:47You know, Tawanda and I live in Georgia.
24:49Tony and Tamar live in California.
24:51My brother Mikey and Tracy live together in Maryland.
24:53So it just made more sense for Tawanda and I
24:56to gravitate towards each other.
24:57But especially after Tracy's passing,
25:00we've gotten even closer because you just never know.
25:03Yes, thank you so much.
25:05So, you know, Trina,
25:06a lot of people were sending me messages saying,
25:10oh my God, is Tawanda sick?
25:12Is Tawanda sick?
25:13Oh my God, is she sick too?
25:16First of all, you remember that we all said
25:19that we were going to cut half our hair, right?
25:21But you didn't cut your hair.
25:24I have a face that's round like mommy's.
25:28Y'all have slender faces, mine is round.
25:30That was my inheritance.
25:32I hadn't exactly told the world that I have alopecia.
25:36A lot of people assume a lot of different things.
25:39I took pride in how I looked and I have to be honest,
25:42I didn't think about my body.
25:45It was what was going on in the inside.
25:47And that was, oh my gosh,
25:49people are going to know that I have alopecia.
25:51Oh my God, maybe people are not going to like me anymore.
25:54How do you feel about it now?
25:55I am who I am.
25:56You accept me or you just don't accept me.
25:58It's just a part of who I am.
25:59I have alopecia and that's just it.
26:02I like it.
26:03Well, thank you.
26:04There's this video of Tracy
26:07and she's got her long little skinny fingers
26:11and she's just rubbing on Tawanda's head
26:13and Tawanda has all these patches,
26:16you know, like missing hair.
26:19Well, she used to always do my hair, didn't you, Tracy?
26:21It's fine, whatever happens, it's still good.
26:23Whatever happens.
26:25Only on Trace, we just always just rub it,
26:26just rub Tawanda's hair.
26:30And Tawanda
26:35cut off her hair and Tracy said that she should do it.
26:38And I need a second,
26:42cause you're not going to get me.
26:43You're not going to get me today, Ochi.
26:48I don't know why, but little Kevin's on my mind.
26:50Is he really?
26:51Yeah, yeah.
26:51You want me to call him?
26:52Yeah.
26:53Okay.
26:54Since Tracy passed,
26:55we have really been trying to be there
26:57for little Kevin as much as possible.
26:59I know we can never fill that void
27:01of losing his mom and his best friend,
27:05but we are definitely doing the best that we can
27:08to be there for him.
27:10Hi, it's so cute.
27:12Hey.
27:13How are y'all?
27:14We're just calling to check in on you,
27:15see how you feeling, see how you're doing.
27:17Yes, I've been making it.
27:20I love you, you look amazing.
27:21Look at your hair.
27:22Yeah, you're twisted, cute.
27:24Look at my hair, I love you.
27:26Wait, wait, wait.
27:27What?
27:28What?
27:29Your wife braided your hair.
27:31When did she do that?
27:32Last week.
27:35She is very confused.
27:36She don't know if she's gonna get married,
27:37or if she's gonna have a child,
27:39so I don't know.
27:40But she did your hair.
27:42Right.
27:43She did my hair.
27:44Little Kevin is Tracy's only son,
27:45and I think that the death of Tracy
27:49has really affected his marriage.
27:51I keep it moving.
27:52I'm sorry, Nicole.
27:53You know, my mom told me that
27:56her doctor's coming up in a few days.
27:57Yeah, yeah.
28:00He's lost a mom and a best friend,
28:03and he's losing his wife,
28:04so I can only imagine
28:06what he's going through emotionally.
28:08We were all together last night,
28:09and what we understand is that
28:13we need to go ahead and go on grief counseling.
28:16I agree.
28:16Okay.
28:18After last night,
28:18we all agreed to have family grief therapy,
28:21and we're deciding that we're gonna go to Tony's house.
28:24Mommy and Trina are cooking Tracy's favorite meals,
28:26like oxtail and turkey wings,
28:29to celebrate her.
28:30And we're also gonna meet with the grief therapist.
28:34This is a different journey for us,
28:36and I'm very hopeful that maybe
28:39whatever's going on with everybody in the family,
28:41maybe they can get it out,
28:42because I think that's important.
28:44Would you want to be a part of that, too?
28:45I've been wanting to get grief counseling lately,
28:48because it was like Christmas,
28:49and it really hit me.
28:50Yeah.
28:51I was like, I want my mom to be there.
28:53Yeah.
28:53And I was feeling kind of down.
28:55Of course.
28:57Yeah, I miss her.
28:58Yeah, I know you do.
29:00I don't want him to go into a downward spiral,
29:03you know, especially during holidays,
29:04especially during those commemorative moments.
29:07That's when a lot of people get so downtrodden,
29:09you know, they just don't want to have to deal with
29:12the stress.
29:13They don't want to have to deal with the hurt.
29:14They don't want to have to deal with their feelings.
29:17He's gotta get it out of his body.
29:19But you know, we're gonna get through this together.
29:21Yes.
29:22Okay.
29:23I love you!
29:24Kiss it.
29:25Bye.
29:27Here's to Tracy.
29:29I'm not above you.
29:29Plank, plank, plank, plank.
29:30I'm not below you.
29:31I'm right here with you.
29:33Yes.
29:42Tell me, what do you feel like you need help with?
29:45When we go through therapy sessions,
29:48a lot of things are revealed.
29:51I just want y'all back.
29:52Are you okay?
29:53No.
29:54Okay.
29:55Check on him, Tawanda.
29:56He has a warrant.
29:58Wait a minute, what?
30:21No ma'am, I need you to slice the onions.
30:24The onions and the garlic.
30:25Oh, you think that's tucking my clothes?
30:27Well, I had to change it.
30:28I'll have Michelle A to do it.
30:30Oh my God.
30:31Yeah, girl.
30:32Prima Donna.
30:33Everybody know that.
30:34It's my middle name.
30:35This week is the two year anniversary of Tracy's passing
30:38and we're getting ready for our family Greek therapy
30:41at Tony's house.
30:42I invited a therapist and her name is Spirit
30:44and she helped me so much in the past.
30:47And I'm hoping she can do the same for everyone else.
30:49Mommy and I came early to start cooking
30:51some of Tracy's favorite dishes,
30:52but Tony has to get camera ready
30:54and Tawanda and Tamar are on their way now.
31:02I'm back.
31:03Hey, Tom.
31:04You on your way here?
31:05Yeah.
31:06Okay.
31:07I'll be there in a few minutes.
31:08I'm just doing the temperature check.
31:09You good?
31:10You ready for today?
31:11I don't know, I'm getting ready.
31:12Emotionally, I'm getting made up for it,
31:15but emotionally, we'll see.
31:19Good, I'm in a good space.
31:21I'm eager to listen, I'm eager to learn,
31:25I'm eager to grow.
31:27Yeah, yeah, I haven't talked to anyone at all
31:31about Tracy's stuff.
31:31I've been dealing with it on my own,
31:33so I'm optimistic that this will help me.
31:37Yes!
31:40I'm optimistic that this grief management thing will work,
31:44but I just miss her.
31:47I just miss her every day.
31:50I try to make myself think of something positive,
31:52like the butterfly doesn't know it used to be a caterpillar,
31:55and a caterpillar doesn't know it's gonna be a butterfly,
31:58so Tracy's a butterfly.
32:01You just try to live with a broken heart,
32:03and it's really difficult trying to make yourself
32:05live with a broken heart.
32:08But you know what, it's not that broken hearty.
32:10It's hard to try to live with a broken heart,
32:12so maybe she can help unbreak our hearts.
32:14So maybe she can help unbreak our hearts.
32:17I know that sounds real corny, but she is.
32:19Son Braxton, you had to put your song in there,
32:22unbreak my heart?
32:23I wasn't even thinking about,
32:24I'm talking about Johnny Mathis' version.
32:26I'm singing Johnny Mathis' version.
32:28Oh, no, uh-uh, no, no, no, that is amazing.
32:31Well, at least we can smile and laugh, you know?
32:34Well, I'll see you in a minute.
32:35All right, see you.
32:36Bye.
32:37Bye.
32:38Bye.
32:39Bye.
32:40Bye.
32:41Bye.
32:41Bye.
32:42Bye.
32:44Okay.
32:45Bye.
32:46Okay, bye.
32:47Bye.
32:51Bye.
32:52Bye.
32:54Okay, bye.
32:55Bye.
32:56Bye.
33:01Bye.
33:04Bye.
33:07Bye, John.
33:08Bye.
33:09Bye.
33:10Tracy love buttermilk this, so I'm making her in her honor.
33:17Let's have some champagne.
33:18I got a quick question.
33:19So what's the objective of today?
33:23I think it depends on the individual.
33:25What do you want to accomplish?
33:26Oh, I'm here for moral support.
33:28I've been to counseling.
33:31I've been to every kind of counseling.
33:33I've been to a psychiatrist.
33:35I've been to a spiritual counselor.
33:37I've been to a EFA.
33:38I've been to everybody.
33:40Different things call for different kind of people
33:42to explain it to you properly.
33:44The way my help is set up, I don't care where it come from
33:46as long as I get it.
33:47Grief counseling is a lot different than regular counseling.
33:49I've been to regular counseling before.
33:52Let me ask you a question.
33:53This is not, I'm not trying to be derogatory.
33:55Ask the questions that you want to ask.
33:56Where's spirit come from?
33:59Why is she calling her spirit?
34:01That's her name.
34:02Oh, obviously she didn't come from you.
34:06Well, I've actually known her for a lot of years.
34:08Okay, what was the first experience with her?
34:13Honestly, the first time that I had a conversation with her,
34:16and this was almost five years ago,
34:18and that's when Gabe passed away.
34:22It was very helpful, but I just wasn't ready.
34:25No, I feel you.
34:26I wasn't ready.
34:30I'm asking you to marry me.
34:32Before I was married to Vaughn,
34:34I was married to Gabe for 14 and a half years,
34:37and we were on and off for the last few years.
34:40Mom, what the f**k did you do to your hair?
34:43You don't like it?
34:43No!
34:46He loved me.
34:46He loved my family.
34:48They loved him in their own way.
34:50Put on some pants.
34:52Mm-mm-mm.
34:53What?
34:54Nobody want to see Dick Van Dyke all over the place?
34:57What?
34:59After Gabe and I divorced, we stayed really good friends,
35:02and when he passed away from cancer,
35:04he was only 43 years old,
35:06and even though I was very happy with Vaughn at the time,
35:09and still am, the pain was unexpected
35:12because I lose someone who was a really big part
35:14of my family and the lives of my children,
35:17and that wasn't something I was ready for.
35:21So when you asked her to come,
35:22can you help my family,
35:23when did you ask her to help?
35:25I just knew, even from a short period of time,
35:27how she helped me.
35:28She asked questions that I didn't want to face at the time,
35:30but I knew that I had to.
35:32Okay.
35:33Well, can we get this show on the road?
35:34Because we won't get this road on the show.
35:37I brought my stuff upstairs.
35:38Why do you have to change?
35:39Because I brought an outfit that Tracy gave to me.
35:42Oh, okay.
35:43Oh, that's what you're doing today?
35:44That's what I'm doing today.
35:45Okay.
35:46Let me tell you what I need.
35:48Let's make some tea.
35:49Let Trina go get dressed.
35:50When you come back down,
35:50we're going to set up over here
35:51and get all comfortable,
35:52so whatever is happening, we be ready.
35:55That part.
35:55Be also ready.
35:57Okay, where's your fancy stuff?
35:58Where's the Toni Braxton stuff?
35:59I don't know.
36:00Generation?
36:01We got cheap stuff.
36:02We got Toni Braxton stuff.
36:03Brian and Johnny.
36:04Yeah, go get the Toni Braxton stuff.
36:05Okay, I do have a little bit
36:06of fancy Toni Braxton tea stuff.
36:08I'm a tea girl.
36:09I love tea parties.
36:10I like collecting tea sets.
36:11Tamar, she loves it.
36:12Where are your Toni Braxton trays?
36:14I haven't been here in Atlanta in a second.
36:16I've been in L.A. working on, you know, that show stuff.
36:20You cannot find, like, paper cups
36:22and bowls and spoons in her house
36:23unless I bring it there.
36:25This Toni Braxton, she got it in this house.
36:27Like, where'd she think she at?
36:29You got a tea towel?
36:31I have everything.
36:32It's the only way it is.
36:34Oh, thank you, Mommy.
36:35Ooh, you look beautiful.
36:37Go, girl.
36:39You hear the doorbell?
36:40Trina, can you answer?
36:41Yes.
36:42Because I don't know her.
36:43I'm gonna take off my robe.
36:44That'd be nice.
36:46Come on, let's go sit down.
36:47Hurry up, hurry up, let's sit down.
36:48Come on, let's go sit down.
36:50Why are we running?
36:51Because we want to be seated when she gets here.
36:53We're not late for class.
36:55Knocking, knocking.
36:56It's me and Spirit.
36:58Okay, let's hold Trina, let's hold Trina.
37:01And then let's make room for all cameras over here.
37:04Hurry up, let's sit down.
37:05Come on.
37:06I don't get a lot of space.
37:07You got space right there.
37:09No, there's mine over here.
37:10Go ahead.
37:11Hey, guys, can you give me a minute just to do final look?
37:14And then, Trina, you're walking with Spirit, okay?
37:16Yes, sir.
37:25Hey, guys, can you give me a minute just to do final look?
37:28And then, Trina, you're walking with Spirit, okay?
37:30Yes, sir.
37:31Kevin Jr. is gonna be on the Zoom.
37:33And Mr. Braxton is also gonna be on the Zoom.
37:36Okay.
37:36He's still up?
37:38My daddy's up.
37:39Daddy is up.
37:40He took a nap.
37:41Everybody got slate?
37:42Cameras off, ladies.
37:50Hey, everybody.
37:51Hi.
37:52Hey, Spirit.
37:53That's Mom.
37:54Hi, Spirit.
37:55Twana, Tony.
37:56Hello.
37:56Nice to meet you.
37:57After the passing of Tracy,
37:59everybody's trying to deal with their pain.
38:03Okay, is this my chair?
38:04Yes, that's your chair.
38:06I want them to have grief counseling
38:09because they need it, for God's sakes.
38:11I need extensive grief counseling also.
38:15Hey, Daddy.
38:17Hello.
38:17Hi, Dad.
38:19Y'all good?
38:21Daddy got his name tag.
38:22That is hilarious.
38:23He says Michael Braxton on the screen.
38:28Hey, Mama.
38:29Hi, handsome.
38:31Hey, Pam.
38:33One of the things that I like to start off by saying is
38:36grief looks different for everybody.
38:38And sometimes we think that we're grieving one thing
38:41and we start to pull on that.
38:42And then we realize that there's a whole lot of things
38:45that are connected to that
38:46because grief is really just a feeling.
38:48But I'm wondering, since you're the person that called,
38:51tell me, what do you feel like you need help with?
38:58Can I not go first?
39:01Why don't you want to go first?
39:03Because I don't think I'm ready to say how I feel yet.
39:06Hmm, okay.
39:09We're clearly nervous
39:11about this family grief counseling session.
39:13And the truth is, we're not great communicators, okay?
39:17We don't know how to communicate with each other.
39:19We don't.
39:20We just shut down and the next time we see each other,
39:22hey, but we ain't never talked about it.
39:24We just pushed it under the rug.
39:26I miss you all terribly.
39:27I'm worried that holding our feelings in
39:30would be the worst thing for us in the long run.
39:31So I think this is really, just really needed.
39:37Okay.
39:39Who else?
39:40What are you all feeling?
39:45We've always dabbled in a little bit
39:47of family group therapy.
39:48And I think in a lot of cases it has worked.
39:51I love you girls.
39:52When we, as a family, go through a lot of grief,
39:56go through therapy sessions,
39:59a lot of things are revealed.
40:03Like things that have been suppressed,
40:06conversations that have been suppressed
40:07that we didn't deal with.
40:09So I don't think that today is gonna be any different.
40:14Sometimes everybody is ready
40:15and sometimes nobody really wants to.
40:17How are you guys feeling about being here tonight?
40:26I have no idea how to feel yet.
40:28So are we just kind of disconnected from our feelings?
40:30No, not disconnected, maybe a little,
40:32but I haven't done grief management before.
40:35So I have no idea what to expect.
40:37Okay.
40:38How do I help you?
40:39I wish I could give you some answers.
40:42I want this to be what I like to call a no judgment zone.
40:46I do not believe in pitting individuals against each other.
40:50I do not believe in creating conflict.
40:53And I do not believe that any individual
40:55is ever a problem in a situation.
41:00I believe that the problems are the problem
41:02and it is up to you as a family
41:04to be able to work through those problems.
41:07It's shifted, it's gone past
41:10how we feel in this whole bereavement situation.
41:14I can't help you if you guys aren't clear
41:17on what you actually want to talk about as real problems.