IT'S A LIVING Season 1 Episode 9 Making the Grade
IT'S A LIVING Season 1 Episode 9 Making the Grade
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Short filmTranscript
00:00Life's not the French Riviera, believe me, Life's not a charity ball,
00:10It isn't all a great big bed of roses, It's not like showbiz,
00:18But the main thing I'm proud to be, I'm proud to be,
00:26I'm proud to be, I'm proud to be, I'm proud to be,
00:34We're gonna get real young and healthy, And anyone who's young and healthy
00:42Knows that that's a way, That traffic flows,
00:52It's a living.
01:12Hey, Vicky, how was your date last night?
01:22Oh, incredible. We went to dinner and a show and we danced all night.
01:26I'm exhausted. I didn't get home till a quarter to twelve.
01:30You really know how to burn a candle at one end.
01:34Oh, I'm sorry, guys. I can never seem to get together on time.
01:38Has Nancy been in? Did you cover for me? I mean, what'd you say to me?
01:40Nothing. You said nothing? Some friends. I counted on you to help me.
01:45Nancy hasn't come in yet. You're not late. I'm not late? I'm not late.
01:50Ladies, I have an announcement to make. Where's Jan?
01:53I knew Simone was late. She's gonna be a little late.
01:57She's already a little late. Now, next week we're going to be book solid
02:01with a group of conventioneers who will be staying at the hotel for the first time.
02:04You know what that means. Yeah. Walk fast between tables.
02:09It means we want to impress them. I'll learn to juggle.
02:13I can juggle. Wanna see? No, no. It'll give me something to live for.
02:17Ladies, please. This is a large group called the Daughters of the Pioneers.
02:22Aren't they dead yet? No.
02:25And we're hoping that they'll choose to stay with us every year.
02:28So let's all do our personal best. I know I will.
02:31Now, this is important, Dot. Try to do someone else's personal best.
02:37Sorry. Halt.
02:39I hope you have a good reason for coming to work late.
02:42Very good. I couldn't get here on time.
02:44Neither will your paycheck.
02:47Hey, nice blouse. Thanks.
02:49Nice jeans. Thanks.
02:51Nice everything. What'd you do, hold up a boutique?
02:53No, I just came from school.
02:55This is my feeling good outfit, which I am wearing because I just handed in a term paper
02:59to my economics teacher that's gonna bring my grade up and knock your socks off.
03:03Isn't this the teacher that asked you out three times already?
03:05Four. He asked me out again today.
03:07Only this time I said yes, and we have a date next week.
03:10Your teacher asked you out? How could he?
03:13Just a wild guess, but maybe he thought he'd have fun.
03:16But a teacher dating a student?
03:19I'm sorry, but I'd never date one of my teachers, coworkers, or members of the clergy.
03:24Look, you better be careful, Jen. It's a little like dating the boss.
03:27Why do you think I waited until the semester was over?
03:29Now it's okay to go out with him because I won't be in his class anymore.
03:31Should've gone out with him when he first asked you.
03:33Then you wouldn't have had to write that term paper.
03:36Sorry to disappoint you folks, but this segment of opinions and answers has come to an end.
03:42Ladies, I don't know if you've noticed, but there are considerably more customers out in the dining room
03:46than there are in here.
03:48Why don't you just run out on the off chance you might meet one?
03:53Thanks.
03:56Oh, they're sweet.
03:59But I think some of them actually are Daughters of the Pioneers.
04:03I don't think they understand our custom of tipping.
04:05Table of four just gave me a hearty handshake.
04:09Aren't they great? Those two ladies on seven are from Minnesota,
04:13and they both have nephews they want me to meet.
04:16Never again to be lonely while ice fishing.
04:20Jan, feeling any better?
04:22Yeah, great.
04:23Oh.
04:24That is not a happy woman.
04:26What do you suppose happened to her today?
04:28I think it was last night. She had a date with her professor.
04:30I don't want to hear about it.
04:34Well, we've seen the thrill of victory.
04:37I'd say this is the agony of defeat.
04:39It's only because I know you so well, but I'd say you're no longer deliriously happy.
04:43Ladies and gentlemen, is this a happy woman?
04:46She can smile.
04:48She can still smile.
04:50Yeah, she can still smile.
04:52Okay, okay, but it's embarrassing after everything I said.
04:55I just got too carried away about Larry.
04:57He seemed so terrific in class, but he was so boring at dinner.
05:01When we left the restaurant, I felt like I was paroled.
05:04Not bad, huh?
05:05I lived for the waiter.
05:07He didn't ask me one question about me all night. No, one.
05:10He asked me what I thought about him.
05:12How could I be so wrong about a guy?
05:14It's called getting to know someone. It's what dating used to be for.
05:18Where's Mario?
05:19I sent back two more specials.
05:20Oh, yes, the daughters are very fussy.
05:22In fact, I just got a note from a lady named Emma giving me two tips to a flakier crust.
05:27That's two more tips than most of us got.
05:37They try to tell us we're too young.
05:49Too young to really be in love.
06:00They say that love's a word.
06:07A word we only learn.
06:14But can't begin to know the meaning of.
06:17And yet we're not too young.
06:19So this love will last three years, we'll go.
06:21And then one day we may recall we're not too young at all.
06:28Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
06:31Uh-huh. I'm sorry, Larry.
06:33I hope I feel better, too.
06:35Thank you.
06:36Are you sick?
06:37I am now.
06:38That was Larry.
06:39He wants another date. I didn't know what else to tell him.
06:41He wouldn't take no for an answer.
06:43Hey, when you got it, you got it.
06:45Look, maybe you should give him another chance.
06:46Nope.
06:48Sometimes you can't tell.
06:50My first date with my husband was a disaster.
06:52Didn't you like him?
06:53Oh, yeah, he didn't like me.
06:55See, he was a campus brain, and I had this crush on him,
06:57so when he finally asked me out, I was so intimidated I didn't say a word all night.
07:01Two years later, he told me it was like dating a blonde lamp.
07:05Lois, I'm not wrong.
07:06When I go out with a guy, I have one of three reactions.
07:09Yes, maybe, and no.
07:10Larry's, oh, no.
07:12If you say so.
07:14How are you going to get rid of him?
07:15I don't know. It's been so long since I had one to brush off.
07:18Why don't you just tell him the truth?
07:20That he's boring?
07:22Lie to him.
07:23I don't want to lie to him, but I don't want to hurt his feelings, either.
07:26Look, you can't have both. Lie to him.
07:28Tommy's more than any woman can handle.
07:30There must be another way.
07:32I have a hard time breaking off with guys, too.
07:35One time I had to move.
07:37Dot, I think I need a more direct route.
07:40Lie to him.
07:42Tell him the truth, but be nice.
07:44Sure. I'm a nice person. I'll tell him the truth.
07:48There are two times when a man doesn't want to hear the truth.
07:50One is when he asks you why you're breaking up.
07:53The other is when he asks, did the earth move for you, too?
07:59Lie to him.
08:07Lois, do you have any extra ashtrays? They're all missing from my station.
08:10The daughters like to take little souvenirs.
08:12Well, then why don't we put an ashtray in each handbag as they leave?
08:15Oh, Nancy, it's innocent enough and it's good advertising.
08:17Lois, we've got to put a stop to it. We can't afford it.
08:19That's $17.50 a lobster tail. They got rights.
08:22Look, all I want you to do is keep your eyes open.
08:24If you spot any pilferage, be gentle, be firm, but get it back.
08:29Even if you have to pick the little deers up by their heels and shake them out.
08:35Boring. I only thought he was boring.
08:37I'd give anything for boring.
08:38That's what you get for trying to be a human being.
08:40You thought he'd be nice? Tell him the truth.
08:42Him. You saw Larry again.
08:43Oh, yes. And I did just like you said.
08:45I was nice and truthful and poof.
08:48What's poof? I don't understand poof.
08:51She didn't lie to him.
08:56What happened? Did you tell him you didn't want to see him again?
08:58I didn't even get the chance. I went to his office, okay?
09:01I was so nervous, my heart was in my mouth.
09:03My mouth. My heart was in my nose.
09:05And I said, Larry, I was a little disappointed in our date the other night.
09:08And he said, so was I.
09:10So that helps.
09:11No, it doesn't. He was disappointed because it ended so soon.
09:15He expected more.
09:16You said it.
09:17And the man is a teacher.
09:22He said that the next date we have,
09:24and the good professor made it very clear there would be a next date,
09:27would end up in bed or I'd end up flunking the course.
09:36I don't believe it.
09:39He actually said that he'd flunk you if you don't go to bed with him?
09:42Yes.
09:43Well, what did you say?
09:44What did I say? What did I say? What do you think I said?
09:47I looked at him right in the eye and I said, nothing.
09:51I didn't know what to say or how to say it.
09:53Oh, I'm so mad at myself, I could bite the floor.
09:58That creep.
09:59I just wish I had said something.
10:02That creep.
10:03I just wish I had said something.
10:05It's not easy when someone catches you off guard like that.
10:08Happened to me once. I was 15.
10:11I was working in a supermarket.
10:12One night the manager decided he wanted to stay late and stamp some cans.
10:17Mine.
10:19What'd you do?
10:21Same as you. At first I was so shocked I said nothing.
10:24Then I punched him in the stomach.
10:27What did he do?
10:28He doubled over and fired me.
10:30Wonderful.
10:31If I flunk this course it sets me back a whole year, not to mention the money.
10:34And I need this course to get my degree.
10:37Maybe you misunderstood him.
10:39Bed is not a term I have to look up.
10:42What am I going to do?
10:43How can he flunk me?
10:44He can't flunk me. That paper's too good.
10:47I hope.
10:49Why don't you go to the dean?
10:50Why don't I go to the dean?
10:51Why don't I go to the dean?
10:52He has to answer to somebody.
10:54What a better person than a dean.
10:56What a wonderful idea.
10:58Why didn't I think of that?
10:59Because you're not being objective, Jan. Now you have to calm down.
11:01Oh, am I going to fix him? I can barely wait to get in there, boy.
11:05I'm going to tell him what a rotten, low-down, little creep.
11:08Jan, calm down or you're not going to make your point.
11:12You're right. You're right. I'll calm down.
11:14I'll just walk in there and I'll relate the facts about what a rotten, little, low-down, miserable...
11:24Lois, I think you better go with me.
11:26I think you better go with him.
11:29Everybody Lisa?
11:32Sorry about the intrusion.
11:33Sonny, you know you're not allowed in here.
11:35Hang loose, baby. It'll only take a minute.
11:36I bet you say that to all the girls.
11:40Listen, I just wanted to talk to everyone before the crowds come in.
11:42I've been getting a lot of complaints from the customers this week.
11:45So don't sing.
11:47That's just it, baby. The daughters of the pioneers love to hear me sing.
11:50And with all the noise you chicks make with the plates and the food, well, it's no good, mamas.
11:54So I'd like to establish a policy of no serving while I perform.
11:57Capisce?
12:01Thank you.
12:09Boy, am I glad I decided to do this.
12:11It's the only way to go. Now it'll be all settled. What a relief.
12:14Good. I'm glad you feel better.
12:16Oh, I do. As a matter of fact, I feel a little silly dragging you along with me.
12:19Well, I could go.
12:20No.
12:22Here she comes.
12:23Hello, ladies.
12:24Hi.
12:25Which one of you is my appointment?
12:27I am. I'm Jan Hoffmeyer. You can call me Jan.
12:30This is my friend, Lois Adams. You can call her Lois.
12:33Dorothy Pressman. You can call me D.
12:37I worked a long time for that.
12:39Now, what can I do for you?
12:42Well, it's about Professor Wilson.
12:46Professor Wilson?
12:47Brown eyes, shoulder bag.
12:49Larry. Economics.
12:51Right. Well, I'm having a little problem in his class.
12:58I really don't know how to say this.
13:00Students and teachers have been having problems for years. I guess I can say I've heard them all.
13:04So what is it?
13:05I'm not doing very well in his economics course. And if I don't sleep with him, he'll flunk me.
13:11That one I don't hear very often.
13:14How do you know this?
13:15He told me. You see, Professor Wilson and I had a date.
13:18You dated your teacher? That's a little complicated.
13:21I wish everyone would stop saying this.
13:23I know. I made a mistake, okay? But not everybody's perfect.
13:26Look, it was the end of the semester. I really thought it would be all right.
13:28And it was only once. It was in a restaurant. Waiters, soup, everything.
13:38Go on.
13:39It didn't turn out too well. And I'm not interested in seeing him anymore.
13:43However, he wants to see a lot more of me. In fact, all of me.
13:48All right. So you have a grievance against the professor and you want to take action, right?
13:53Right.
13:54Let me tell you how your case might sound.
13:57Student is doing poorly in class. Student dates professor to get a better grade.
14:01Professor refuses to cooperate. Student accuses professor of improper behavior as a last resort to ensure a passing grade.
14:10Do you see how that could sound?
14:11I don't care how it sounds. All I know is he's blackmailing me and it feels crummy.
14:15Jan, why don't you tell him about the paper?
14:17Oh, yes, the paper. You see, I wrote this really terrific paper that should bring my grade up.
14:21All I want is for you to make sure he gives me the grade I deserve.
14:24Again, it's the same problem. I read the paper and think you're Madame Curie.
14:29He reads it and thinks you're Bozo the Clown.
14:33So you're telling me you can't do a damn thing?
14:35I'm telling you it's your word against his. You need more proof.
14:40Look, I know this is a frustrating situation. I understand how you feel.
14:44If I go to Larry Wilson with this, he'll deny it. He'll say you deserve your flunking and you'll be in an even worse spot.
14:51I'm afraid all you can do is try not to worry, have faith in your term paper and hope the turkey can take no for an answer.
15:01I'm sorry.
15:03You're sorry.
15:15Hi, Jan.
15:17Hi, Larry.
15:18What a surprise. Well, not really. Come on in.
15:22Thanks.
15:23I was just going over some term papers.
15:25Oh, didn't happen to get to mine yet, did you?
15:27Not yet.
15:29Can I take your coat?
15:30Thanks.
15:35Well, what do you think of the place?
15:38It's nice. Very tasteful.
15:41Oh, thank you. Furnished it myself.
15:43See that bookcase? That is a real antique. I got it three years ago for $1,500. Today it's worth $5,500.
15:51You know what kind of profit that is?
15:53250%. Now do I get a passing grade?
15:57There's still time.
16:00Well, please, sit.
16:03Thanks.
16:05Put that dimmer in myself. Saves 14% on the electric bills.
16:10Like I say, you can take the economics teacher out of the class, but you can't take the class out of the economics teacher.
16:17I can see that.
16:18Yeah.
16:20Uh, Larry, I've been thinking.
16:23About me, I hope.
16:24Almost nonstop, you might say.
16:26About me, I hope.
16:27Almost nonstop, you might say.
16:29Oh, that's good. That's very, very good.
16:40Uh, I came here because, uh, Larry, you really would do what you said you're gonna do if I don't do what you want me to do, would you?
16:52In a minute.
16:54I'm sorry, Larry, I don't feel that way about you.
16:57Come on, Jan, I could tell in class that you were interested in me.
17:00Class, you were interesting. But, uh, to tell you the truth, since our date the other night, uh, I really don't like you.
17:09No problem. I like you, and that's what counts. You turn me on.
17:13But that's crazy. Don't you know that's crazy? It makes you sound like some sort of a...
17:16Please, please, save it. I don't feel like being analyzed.
17:19And I don't feel like being assaulted.
17:21Would you give me a break?
17:22No, give me one. What's the difference between what you're doing with a grade book and what some guy does with a gun in a parking lot?
17:31You are crazy.
17:32Maybe. Oh, uh, by the way, I did go to the dean, so you are being watched.
17:40This is a good deal for everybody. You give a little, I give a little. That's what life's about.
17:46Not my life. I came here because I hoped you'd act like a person, but you know something? Oh, you're beyond that.
17:52You really don't want me. You just want the feeling of power that this gives you.
17:55Forget it, Hoffmeier. I don't need this. I've had a lot of girls in my class, and nobody's ever pulled this.
18:00I'm sure they didn't, because they were probably too young or too scared or really needed the credits.
18:06Well, maybe that's the only way you can get a woman. But you're not gonna get me.
18:12Good night, Professor.
18:17Take that and stuff it in your bookcase.
18:30Hello? Oh, hi, sweetheart.
18:32Is it for me? Phyllis was gonna call.
18:33I don't call your friend Phyllis, sweetheart.
18:35I'm sorry. It's just that Phyllis is gonna call from school. The grades are being posted today.
18:38Yeah, I forgot. I'll just be a minute. It's Joey. Hi.
18:41What?
18:42No, practicing the piano will not ruin your hands for football. You just keep practicing.
18:46I don't care what Sparky says.
18:49Yeah. Honey, I gotta go.
18:51Yeah, well, you just finish your exercises, then you can do anything you want.
18:54Yeah, anything. Okay.
18:57What did I just say?
19:02Tan, did you hear about your grades yet?
19:03Not yet.
19:04God, I hate waiting.
19:05Come on, Phyllis.
19:06You know, tonight is the last night of the Daughters of the Pioneers. I'm gonna miss them.
19:10Me too.
19:11You?
19:12Yeah, Nancy's been so busy counting ashtrays, she's left us alone.
19:16They're all right. Once you get used to them, they're just a little different than our regular customers.
19:20You know that group of people that sat at my station all week and didn't leave any tips?
19:24Well, last night they gave me this.
19:26Oh.
19:28They worked on it all week. It's hand-knitted.
19:30And I got a patchwork quilt.
19:32I got a good talking to.
19:36Come on, Phyllis. Call Phyllis.
19:38Phyllis, Phyllis, Phyllis.
19:39Hey, you think there's any chance Laurie will pass you?
19:41No, but I can hope, can't I?
19:43Phyllis.
19:45Phyllis, what's the verdict?
19:47Phyllis, I don't want to guess. What'd I get?
19:51Thank you, Phyllis.
19:53He gave me a C.
19:59Ah, I guess the turkey could take no for an answer.
20:02I still wish I could have punched him in the stomach.
20:04Hey, I have a bottle of champagne in my locker that I've been saving. Let's celebrate Jancy.
20:07Great.
20:09I haven't had champagne since my anniversary.
20:11I haven't had it since my divorce.
20:13I've never had champagne.
20:14You call that champagne?
20:16It is on the 727.
20:17Okay, stand back.
20:20It's a little flat.
20:22Jan only got a C.
20:23Yeah, but what a C.
20:25Not too much for me.
20:27Not too much for any of us.
20:30To integrity.
20:32To virtue.
20:34To guts.
20:35To Jan.
20:36To work.
20:39To work.
21:10To Jan.
21:11To Jan.
21:12To Jan.
21:13To Jan.
21:14To Jan.
21:15To Jan.
21:16To Jan.
21:17To Jan.
21:18To Jan.
21:19To Jan.
21:20To Jan.
21:21To Jan.
21:22To Jan.
21:23To Jan.
21:24To Jan.
21:25To Jan.
21:26To Jan.
21:27To Jan.
21:28To Jan.
21:29To Jan.
21:30To Jan.
21:31To Jan.
21:32To Jan.
21:33To Jan.
21:34To Jan.
21:35To Jan.
21:36To Jan.
21:37To Jan.