Henry's Cat Henry’s Cat S03 E005 The Computer
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CreativityTranscript
00:00Miaou! Miaou!
00:24Henry's cat had just been for a very long walk and was feeling very hungry.
00:29Unfortunately, there were no shops around where he could buy some food.
00:33Glancing around the magnificent sweep of the landscape,
00:36he did see a large exhibition building with lots of people going in.
00:40And where there are lots of people, there is food, as every cat knows.
00:44Henry's cat went in and soon found a snack bar,
00:47and after a pickled onion milkshake and a marzipan sandwich, felt much better.
00:52So he thought he would walk around the exhibition.
00:54It was all about computers and robots.
00:57Now even the cleverest cats don't know much about robots and computers,
01:02as they are not tasty, smelly, chasty or warm.
01:07So there's not much point in knowing about them.
01:10Henry's cat looked around to see what was going on.
01:13There were computers that could walk, talk, draw, tell the time,
01:22act as traffic wardens and even cook.
01:26There was even a lecturer who said that one day computers might replace humans.
01:32This seemed like a good idea.
01:34Henry's cat knew of several humans who needed replacing,
01:37like Farmer Giles and Comfortable Bulldog, for example.
01:40Oh, they'll never replace cats though, because cats don't do anything useful,
01:47and that's a great talent to have in the world today, thought Henry's cat.
01:53It then occurred to him that a computer might be a very useful thing to have around the house,
01:58particularly for going out in rainy weather to buy cat food,
02:01or for bringing him breakfast in bed, or doing the housework.
02:05The more he thought about it, the more uses he could imagine.
02:09Oh, I wonder how much they cost, thought Henry's cat.
02:13Well, the obvious way to find out was to ask a computer, as they seemed to know everything.
02:18And there was one just near him, answering questions.
02:21One man asked,
02:22Oh, excuse me, how heavy is the world?
02:26The computer did a lot of calculations and said,
02:29Precisely, very heavy, 260 devil points.
02:34A little girl asked what dinosaurs ate for breakfast,
02:38but before the computer could answer,
02:40her mother took her away, telling her not to speak to strange computers.
02:44Henry's cat saw his opportunity and said,
02:47Oh, excuse me, sir or madam, how much does a computer cost?
02:52The computer was silent for a moment,
02:54and Henry's cat was just about to ask the question again when the computer said,
02:58You don't have to repeat the question. I am not stupid, you know. How much have you got?
03:07Well, Henry's cat didn't have much money,
03:09but he did have some spare tins of cat food and old clothes left by his grandfather.
03:14He offered these as a deposit.
03:16The computer blinked and said rather haughtily,
03:19I'm afraid that's not enough by the long way,
03:23but I do have a small computer friend here who isn't busy for the moment.
03:29You can buy him for one week till you have changed your cat food and old clothes for money.
03:36Oh, thank you, said Henry's cat, and he took the computer's hand.
03:41It seemed a very friendly computer.
03:43It buzzed and clicked merrily as Henry's cat led it away.
03:47It stopped at the curb and looked both ways before leading Henry's cat across the road.
03:51It could remember every car number it saw and could even tell the time backwards,
03:55which was extremely useful.
03:57Henry's cat was very impressed.
03:59He hoped he could raise enough money to buy the nice computer,
04:02but how to raise the money, that was the problem.
04:06When Henry's cat got home, he thought very hard about it
04:09and decided to ask his friend for advice.
04:12So he immediately invited them all round to tea.
04:16When his friends arrived, he said,
04:18Oh, you know, for a long time I have been considering getting a computer for my business purposes and etc.
04:28His friends were all a bit puzzled by this,
04:31but then Henry's cat led in the small computer, who he had now named Pooter for short.
04:36Pooter buzzed and flicked his eyes in a friendly sort of way.
04:40I have a very difficult problem that needs the advice of friends.
04:44It is, how can I raise the money to buy Pooter?
04:48He is very clever and knows things like how much vinegar to put on chips
04:53and how far it is from here to there, said Henry's cat.
04:57Well, they were all very good at digging holes in the ground
05:01and sunbathing and having picnics and that sort of thing,
05:04but earning money was something they were not good at.
05:08Then his duck said,
05:10Let's hold a raffle.
05:13Oh, that's a good idea, but what shall we raffle, said Henry's cat.
05:18Oh, we could raffle the computer.
05:21That would be a good thing to win, wouldn't it, said Ted Tortoise.
05:26Eh, that's a silly idea.
05:29We'd have to buy it back again, wouldn't we, said Mosey Mouse.
05:34Oh, I was only trying to help, said Ted Tortoise,
05:38who went back into his shell and went to sleep.
05:41Oh, oh no, oh no, let's have a race and win Pooter the prize.
05:45It was a silly idea, as they didn't own Pooter to give him away,
05:49even to themselves.
05:51Then a little boy said, I've got an idea.
05:54It was Sammy Snail, and as he didn't often get ideas,
05:57they all listened quietly.
05:59Oh, what's your idea then, said Henry's cat.
06:03Well, if a computer is so clever,
06:06why don't you ask it how to pay for itself?
06:10That did seem a very good idea.
06:13Oh, why didn't you think of that, said Henry's cat to Pooter.
06:17You've never asked me.
06:20If I was to go around telling everyone what I thought,
06:24then I'd be just like a person, wouldn't I?
06:28And with that, Pooter gave a sulky buzz and his lights went out.
06:34Oh, I'm sorry, Pooter.
06:37Will you please help us so that we can buy you?
06:41Pooter's eyes lit up and he started to click and buzz loudly.
06:45Everyone could see that Pooter was thinking very hard.
06:49He gave a happy bleep and said,
06:51As you put a deposit on me with cat food and old clothes,
06:55you can start a barter club and charge two pence an item.
07:00I can sort out the things
07:02so everyone can swap their old rubbish for new rubbish.
07:06Quack, quack.
07:08Why do people want rubbish, said Denise Duck.
07:12That's a philosophical question.
07:15And computers only know that they do, said Pooter.
07:19Chris Rabbit said,
07:21Oh, that's a good idea, that's a good idea.
07:23We put up notices everywhere saying,
07:25Rubbish exchange at two pence a time.
07:27See Henry's cat.
07:29Soon there were notices up everywhere.
07:31It wasn't long before they started to get results.
07:33The first person to come was Captain McGregor.
07:36He had a wooden right leg,
07:38so had lots of right shoes he didn't want.
07:40And he needed a raincoat for his parrot.
07:42So he gave Henry's cat two pence and said he'd be in touch
07:45as soon as someone with a parrot's raincoat
07:47requested some right-footed shoes.
07:50The next person was a little boy.
07:52He gave some fireworks, only used once,
07:54for an Indian suit, when one was available.
07:57Then a lady came along
07:59with lots of household things for cooking and cleaning.
08:01She wanted to exchange these for a ticket to somewhere
08:04as far away as possible.
08:06After that, a little girl wanted to exchange
08:08her little brother for a racing car,
08:10but said if Henry's cat didn't have a car,
08:12he could have a brother anyway.
08:14Henry's cat was very pleased with the way things were going
08:17and he patted Pooter on the head and tickled his switch.
08:21By the end of the day, Henry's cat had made over six pounds,
08:24but had a room full of rubbish.
08:26Henry's cat looked around at all the rubbish that had come in
08:29and wondered how long it would be
08:31before he found the right things to exchange
08:33so that the rubbish went out again.
08:35Wow, we seem to be getting a lot in,
08:38but when do you think it will start going out, Pooter?
08:41Henry's cat inquired.
08:43Pooter clicked and hummed and flashed and said,
08:46Three weeks, 2.791 days,
08:50by which time you will have earned
08:52138 pounds and 64 pence.
08:57Wow, even Henry's cat could work out
08:59that he could afford Pooter,
09:01and had enough over to buy lots of cat food,
09:03ice creams and cakes as well.
09:06It seemed a very good idea of Pooter's.
09:09Henry's cat then had another thought.
09:11Oh, that sounds good, but how much rubbish
09:14do we have before we start exchanging it?
09:16Pooter clicked and buzzed again and said,
09:19Enough to fill four houses,
09:22two gardens, a woodshed,
09:24three wheelbarrows and a gym yard.
09:27Henry's cat thought it was time to go for a cup of tea.
09:30If he could only get his foot out of a bicycle wheel,
09:32he had exchanged for six matching hot water bottles.
09:35Oh, you didn't tell me how much space we'd need, did you?
09:39said Henry's cat, a little bit peeved.
09:41You didn't ask me, did you?
09:44said the computer, obviously a bit upset.
09:47You're just like people.
09:50You ask silly questions
09:52and expect computers to come up with sensible answers.
09:56You only ask me how to make money
09:59and you've already made six pounds.
10:03That's very good for the first time.
10:06Henry's cat realised he was really to blame,
10:09and he gave Pooter some oil and paper for supper
10:12and turned him off so that he could have a rest.
10:15Then he went to sleep himself,
10:17which he'd just managed to do once he'd found his bed under all the rubbish.
10:22When Henry's cat awoke the next morning,
10:25he thought he was having a bad dream
10:27and would soon wake up for a nice breakfast.
10:29But then he realised it was not a dream
10:31and at any moment more rubbish would be arriving.
10:34Henry's cat made his way through the rubbish to the kitchen.
10:37Pooter had already switched himself on
10:39with having oil and paper for breakfast.
10:41Henry's cat said,
10:42Oh, I think you've been very clever getting all this rubbish,
10:46but now I wish I could get rid of it all.
10:50That's easy.
10:51All you do is to get one of your friends
10:54to tell the council it is disfiguring the landscape
10:58and they will take it away,
11:01and you as well.
11:03Oh, me as well?
11:05Why will they take me away?
11:08For causing a disfigurement to the landscape,
11:11said Pooter.
11:13Oh, but that's not very nice for me, is it?
11:17And he imagined himself being taken away.
11:19Well, you only asked me how to get rid of the rubbish.
11:23You're not very easy to please, are you?
11:27Henry's cat had a vague idea.
11:29He'd had to solve this problem himself.
11:31So he went off to meet his friends.
11:34Chris Rabbit suggested wrapping all the rubbish up
11:36and making them presents into a lucky dip,
11:38but Henry's cat pointed out that this would be difficult
11:40with things like steam rollers and grandfather clocks.
11:43Denise Duck suggested a raffle,
11:45but Sammy Snail had a better idea.
11:47He suggested that they give all the rubbish to charity,
11:49as lots of people did that,
11:51and also give all the money they earned
11:53with the names of the people who gave it.
11:55People like to have their names on a list like that.
11:57It was a good idea.
11:59They all marched down to the town hall to see the mayor,
12:02and Henry's cat said,
12:04Oh, dear sir or madam,
12:06we have collected many items of great value
12:08which we are donating to charity,
12:10and have collected over £6 in genuine money
12:13for a good cause,
12:15such as removing all the rubbish we have.
12:17The mayor was so impressed,
12:19he stood on a dustbin and made a speech,
12:22thanking everyone for donating their junk to charity.
12:25He gave a special thank you to Pooter,
12:27whose idea it was,
12:29and said the council needed someone like Pooter
12:31to take on council work.
12:33Henry's cat saw his opportunity and said to the mayor,
12:35Oh, as a matter of fact,
12:37Pooter is looking for a job.
12:39He only needs oil and paper for breakfast,
12:42and a new plug every birthday.
12:45The mayor said Pooter could start work straight away.
12:48Well, Pooter was very pleased with that,
12:50and burst and flickered happily.
12:52Henry's cat waved goodbye to Pooter.
12:54He had decided he didn't need a computer
12:56to solve his problems,
12:58but he certainly didn't need one to give him problems.
13:01He summed it all up by saying,
13:03Oh, computers are all right in their place,
13:06but you can't count on them.
13:28Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada