Dave & Chuck the Freak talk about a Florida man who was finally arrested after multiple instances of public masturbation and try to figure out the crazy reason he gave for doing it when he was busted by police.
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00:00Although this should be our pervert of the day, we're going to play it a little differently
00:08today.
00:09Okay.
00:11Today we're going to play...
00:15Why was he jerking it?
00:16Why was he jerking it?
00:18Why was he jerking it?
00:20Because he was horny and he had no way to go home to.
00:22A hankering.
00:23It's not a question we normally ask.
00:25No.
00:26It's not, Lisa.
00:27Why was he jerking it?
00:29Is this like an excuse he gave the authorities?
00:32Yes.
00:33Why did he say he was jerking it?
00:35There you go.
00:36Oh, man.
00:38A Florida man charged with indecent exposure offered cops a bizarre explanation as to why
00:47he was pleasuring himself in public.
00:50Officers were dispatched the other morning to a Speedway convenience store in Vero Beach
00:56after a 911 caller advised there was a naked white male screaming at someone at the side
01:01of the road.
01:03Upon arriving on the scene, officers encountered Jason Roach.
01:07Mm-hmm.
01:08The 40-year-old Roach had been questioned twice the prior evening because he was apparently
01:16caught jerking it at an Arby's.
01:21He's got the meat.
01:22Yeah.
01:23And a Wawa convenience store.
01:25Mm-hmm.
01:26In both instances, he just stopped and went on his way.
01:29Okay, thanks.
01:30Yep, I will stop.
01:31Oh, yeah, but he clearly won't.
01:34The third time, however, was not the charm.
01:37A witness told police that Roach was naked and touching himself in the motion of jerking
01:42off.
01:43Can I be honest?
01:44Yes.
01:45You shouldn't let a man go one time for that.
01:48They let him go twice in the same night.
01:50You shouldn't let a man go once.
01:52Hey, Roach, are you jerking off again?
01:54Hey, go ahead.
01:55Go home.
01:56Go and get.
01:57Go and get.
01:58Fine, I will.
01:59Publicly jerking it.
02:00Twice.
02:01One night.
02:02This is the third time in 12 hours.
02:03You should never be let go for it.
02:05Oh, hey, I'm in a Wawa.
02:07I think I should jerk off.
02:08Yeah.
02:09What was his excuse?
02:10Well, that's what we got to.
02:11That's the big question.
02:12The question about it at his activities, he told them a reason why he had to ejaculate.
02:20Okay.
02:21What's that reason?
02:22I hope that was his quote.
02:23Yeah.
02:24Is the, what is Scarlett Johansson?
02:29That's a good guess.
02:31I thought you had it.
02:35I mean, I've had that excuse before.
02:37Yeah.
02:38I thought he was going to say he was applying some kind of topical cream.
02:41Oh, that's a good one.
02:42That is a.
02:43That's a good one though.
02:44That is a good one.
02:45Great guess.
02:46Oh, Elise, you got anything?
02:50Why was he jerking it?
02:53Did he get the poison out?
02:56Oh.
02:57Not bad.
02:58That is a good one.
02:59That's pretty impressive.
03:00You know what you get?
03:01Yeah.
03:02Yeah.
03:03It's not correct, but I'll give you the description.
03:04No, that's pretty good.
03:05At least he's been reading my playbook.
03:06Yeah.
03:07One more round before I tell you why he was jerking it.
03:11Did he say he wasn't jerking it?
03:12He just had a real bad itch he was scratching?
03:14Oh, bad itch.
03:16Not bad itch.
03:17No.
03:18Geez.
03:19Geez.
03:20Was he freshly waxed?
03:22No.
03:23I'm out of ideas, guys.
03:24Yeah, I know.
03:25Um.
03:26He saw Chuck the Freak's picture.
03:27Yeah.
03:28Yeah.
03:29No.
03:30He was.
03:31I'll give you a clue.
03:32He was jerking it because he was having issues with blank.
03:34He's having issues with his boyfriend.
03:35So he had to.
03:36Having issues with blank.
03:37I went for the twist.
03:38With his blank.
03:39Eyesight?
03:40That doesn't even make sense.
03:41I heard it makes you go blind if you do too much.
03:42Mm-hmm.
03:43Mm-hmm.
03:44Mm-hmm.
03:45Mm-hmm.
03:46Mm-hmm.
03:47Mm-hmm.
03:48Mm-hmm.
03:49Mm-hmm.
03:50Mm-hmm.
03:51Mm-hmm.
03:52Mm-hmm.
03:53Mm-hmm.
03:54Mm-hmm.
03:55Mm-hmm.
03:56Mm-hmm.
03:57Mm-hmm.
03:58Mm-hmm.
03:59Mm-hmm.
04:00Mm-hmm.
04:01Mm-hmm.
04:02Mm-hmm.
04:03Mm-hmm.
04:04One more chance here.
04:05Anyone?
04:06Come on, guys.
04:07I'm jerking it because I'm having issues with my...
04:11Testicles.
04:12Oh, you're close, but...
04:14Anus?
04:15Prostate.
04:16Anus, his rectum.
04:17Oh!
04:18Oh.
04:19And in order to get rid of his anal pain, he said he had to ejaculate.
04:24I'm gonna have to try this.
04:25Mm-hmm.
04:26To be honest, I don't deal with a lot of anal pain, so now it's...
04:30Making some sense.
04:31Now you know why.
04:32Why?
04:33You're not very relaxed back there.
04:36Despite that compelling explanation as to why he was pleasuring himself...
04:40Ow!
04:41...Roach was arrested for exposure of sexual organs and misdemeanor.
04:44Well, finally.
04:45Finally.
04:46He was booked into the Indian River County Jail where he's being held on a $50,000 bond.
04:51He's gonna be arraigned in a couple of weeks.
04:54Has quite a list of previous convictions.
04:57Battery, petty theft.
04:58Burglary, grand theft.
05:00Filing false documents and resisting police.
05:03See, like, to me, the very first time when they let him go, they should have at least, like, looked him up.
05:12And then looking him up would have then said to them, oh...
05:16There he is.
05:17Oh, boy.
05:18I see why they let him go.
05:19I see why they let him go.
05:20Just like, in his own head, he thought, like, the cops will let me go.
05:24They might even stop people, like, be like, let him finish.
05:27He's experiencing...
05:28Everyone stay away.
05:29He's got anal pain.
05:30He's experiencing anal pain.
05:32Stand back, everybody.
05:33We don't know what his range is.
05:36Um...
05:37I know why they let him go, because it just looks like he's...
05:41He's...
05:42He's half a sloth.
05:43So, wait, his name's Roach?
05:44Yeah.
05:45Jason Roach.
05:46Is he related to Flea?
05:47Because they both got bug names and they both look very similar.
05:49Yeah.
05:50No relation that I know of.
05:51Oh, boy, huh?
05:52But, yeah, he is...
05:53His head is not as wide as it appears on my screen.
05:56Oh.
05:57Okay.
05:58The screen...
05:59My screen does stretch people out, remember?
06:01Yeah, that's true.
06:02But, yeah.
06:03But, like, he's got a wonky ear and a good ear and then...
06:07Yeah.
06:08Issues with his buckles.
06:09He looks like he talks like a fat person.
06:10Like a fat person.
06:11He does look good.
06:13I bet he does.
06:15Yeah.
06:16You're real desperate when you admit to the cops that you have anal pain.
06:19Right?
06:20And that's the reason you're jerking off.
06:22Maybe he's used that excuse before.
06:23So, he's like, every time I got busted jerking in public by the cops, I just tell him I have anal pain.
06:27I mean, it might...
06:28That might be why they let him go twice.
06:30Yeah.
06:31Like, oh, this poor guy.
06:32Oh, anal pain.
06:33Get out of here.
06:34Go on, git.
06:35Yeah.
06:36Take care of that anus.
06:37Yeah.
06:38But don't.
06:39No.
06:40Can't do that.
06:41That'll do it for our first ever edition of Why Was He Jerking It.
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