Category
😹
FunTranscript
00:00Oh, good, your power's out, too.
00:02Why is that good?
00:04Because last month I sent the electric company a Starbucks gift card, an apology note, and a few snapshots of me in a bra.
00:11Power failure. Implementing power failure protocol.
00:16What happened to all your glow-in-the-dark emergency exit stuff you had painted on the floor?
00:20Oh, that was wildly carcinogenic.
00:23Anyway, too bad you're no longer entitled to the full benefits of my friendship,
00:28because I happen to be extremely prepared for such an emergency.
00:31Please, try not to see anything by this light.
00:35It's not for you.
00:37It's just a blackout. I'm sure the power will be back on soon.
00:40And I'm sure some fool in the Donner party said the snow would stop any day now.
00:46I like to think they ate him first.
00:49Yeah, I got some candles in my apartment.
00:51Candles? During a blackout? Are you mad? That's a fire hazard.
00:55Pasadena Water and Power recommends the far safer glow stick.
01:00You call that a glow stick?
01:08That is a glow stick.
01:11All right, let's go.
01:12Before you go, consider this.
01:14Not only do I have a deep-cycle marine battery power source, which is more than capable of running our entertainment system,
01:20I also have all 61 episodes of the BBC series Red Dwarf.
01:25And Fiddle Faddle.
01:28All yours, if you're willing to reinstate the roommate agreement.
01:33I've got wine at my place and some bubble wrap we could pop.
01:41He'll be back. Wine and a girl in the dark. He's going to be bored out of his mind.
01:45Check the mail.
01:47How many times are you going to tell me? What's with you?
01:49Oh, nothing. It's not suspicious that I'm fixating. It's consistent with my personality.
01:55Right.
01:56Hey, guys.
01:57More Halloween candy? Didn't you just buy a bunch of it yesterday?
02:00Oh, yeah, that's gone.
02:04It's a rough month when Halloween and PMS hit at the same time.
02:09Leonard doesn't have time to chat. He has to get the mail.
02:12Will you relax? I'll get it in a minute.
02:14Hey, how was work?
02:15Open the mail.
02:17Excuse me.
02:26A couple of circulars. Nothing important.
02:29What's with him?
02:30Hang on.
02:42You might be from Texas, but I'm from New Jersey.
02:47Hard as this may be to believe, it's possible that I'm not boyfriend material.
02:57Glad I was sitting down for that.
03:01Did you and Amy get in a fight?
03:03Amy had a fight. I was being perfectly reasonable.
03:07I'm going to have a whiskey. Do you want anything?
03:10No, I can't. I'm playing Grand Theft Auto later.
03:18Look, I'm no expert in women.
03:21I'll say.
03:23That's not necessary when someone's trying to help you.
03:26Sorry, it's the alcohol talking going on.
03:32Sometimes with women you want to listen to what upsets them and show them that you can grow and change.
03:42Nuts to that. What else you got?
03:44While we were going out, how often would you pretend to like things just to have sex with me?
03:49All the time.
03:52You're kidding.
03:54Does this sound familiar?
03:55I'd love to go shoe shopping with you.
03:59Hiking? It's great.
04:01It's 2 a.m. Of course I want to go to Koreatown and sing karaoke with your friends. Who wouldn't?
04:08Okay, we were going out. You were going to get sex anyway.
04:11Really? You would have slept with me after a three-hour documentary on dams?
04:17No, no woman would.
04:20See, now that's the great thing. We're out as friends. This is not a date. Sex is off the table.
04:25So, let's go learn why hydroelectric power might not be the environmental bargain you think it is.
04:33Sorry, spoiler alert.
04:38Alright, fine.
04:39Thanks.
04:41Tickets are 11 bucks.
04:47Not a date.
04:49To wine and bubble wrap.
04:52And to not having to watch Sheldon demonstrate his reverse osmosis machine that converts urine into drinking water.
05:01You know, in Girl Scouts, Tammy Denisha said you could do that with pantyhose.
05:06Boy, was she wrong.
05:08Anyway, you want to make out?
05:11I thought because our relationship's in a beta test, you wanted to take things slow.
05:16Okay. Do you want to make out slow?
05:20If I can go so slow, it'll be like there's a snail in your mouth.
05:26Oh.
05:29Well, lucky for you, there's nothing else to do right now.
05:34Sweetheart, how's it going?
05:35Sweetheart, how's it going?
05:37Uh, not so good. We have to talk.
05:40Oh? Sounds serious. What's up?
05:43Okay, uh, here it is.
05:46I met this girl, and I kissed her, and I feel terrible about it, but it's done, it's never gonna happen again, and I am so, so sorry.
05:54No, no. Relax. It's okay.
05:56It is?
05:57Yeah, these things happen. They happen to everybody.
06:01Oh, my God. You are amazing. I mean, I don't deserve you. What do you mean, everybody?
06:11Leonard, I didn't know if I should tell you, but I kind of cheated on you, too.
06:17Kind of?
06:20A couple of weeks ago, I slept with my ex-boyfriend, so I guess we both messed up a little.
06:28No, no, I messed up a little. You messed up a lot.
06:33Well, it's not a competition.
06:35Oh, yeah, it is, and you won.
06:39Leonard, check it out. I bought an Engage locomotive, half the size of HO. Look, it fits in my mouth.
06:50Sounds like you had a great night.
06:52I did.
06:53How was yours?
06:54Not bad. I had a lot more fun with Amy than I thought I would.
06:58What exactly do you mean by that?
07:00Turns out she really knows how to help a guy loosen up and have a good time.
07:04Although, truth be told, my groin's a little worse for wear.
07:13Why'd you do that?
07:14To send a message. She is not for you.
07:18What?
07:19Not for me.
07:20Not for you.
07:22What?
07:23Not for you.
07:25While he was telling you things, did he mention he owns not one, but two Star Trek uniforms?
07:31Really?
07:32Yeah, wears them. Not just for Halloween.
07:37Hey, pal.
07:40You didn't see me telling Kevin that you thought Cold Wars were only fought in winter.
07:46Okay, then I'll return the favor, and I won't tell.
07:49Laura.
07:50Laura, that half the dirty movies you own are animated.
07:59When you were telling Kevin about your acting career,
08:02did you mention your long-running role as waitress in a local production of The Cheesecake Factory?
08:09Did you tell her about your lucky asthma inhaler?
08:13Oh, yeah? Spell asthma.
08:16A-S...
08:19Take me home.
08:21Maybe I'm not done hanging out with...
08:26You're right, it's getting late.
08:28Ta-da!
08:29A vintage, mint-in-box, 1975 Mego Star Trek transporter with real transporter action. Hot darn!
08:39Where did you get that?
08:41From Stewart at the comic book store.
08:42Stewart at the comic book store?
08:43You went to the comic book store by yourself?
08:46Yeah. It was fun. I walked in and two different guys got asthma attacks.
08:52Felt pretty good.
08:54This calls for an expression of gratitude.
08:57Ooh, am I about to get a rare Sheldon Cooper hug?
08:59No, not this time. Then they wouldn't be special.
09:02Thanks, Penny.
09:05You're welcome.
09:07Don't worry, I didn't forget about you.
09:09I got you... Leonard, I got you...
09:12A label maker!
09:21Oh!
09:23No, it's great.
09:25Also, mint-in-box.
09:28And I got you a transporter chair!
09:30Awesome!
09:35Look, it was actually designed for my vintage Mr. Spock action figure.
09:39Oh, that's great! Let's open it up and put him in there.
09:41No!
09:44Why are there just toys?
09:45They're mint-in-box.
09:47Come on, can't we open one up and take a look?
09:49Come on!
09:51Once you open the box, it loses its value.
09:54Yeah, yeah, my mom gave me the same lecture about my virginity.
10:00Gotta tell you, it was a lot more fun taking it out and playing with it.
10:09AVAILABLE NOW