The Wonton Don
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00:00That Istanbul girl was all like damn you're so hot even with your busted ass hairline
00:05I was like, yeah, I don't know what you're saying
00:07But like here's the Google Translate and then she wrote in Google Translate. You're so hot. Did you get her phone number?
00:14No, I don't do I don't do that
00:16all right, that's a
00:18meaningless interaction
00:26Oh
00:28My god, dude, I am hungover as balls
00:36Who knows how to get to the hotel, I think the plan was to like not get everybody too drunk
00:42Everyone's was supposed to say sober. I guess tonight dinner
00:45We all got tanked but no one more so than Nikki smokes. I was in this girl's
00:55I'm worried about Nikki smokes
00:58Dealing with his eccentricities Nikki smoke said I wish a terrorist would try me. I would one up
01:03So I think Nikki smokes is actively looking to get into some sort of fight while we're there. Sir. What is this?
01:15That's like a Bud Light Noah
01:18Dave how you feeling million dollars. How you doing? You're a little hungover a little hungover. I'll be fine though
01:24All I needed was a Turkish breakfast French toast
01:28And I was back on track
01:30But before we could officially start the day Nikki needed to get his blood work done every time I give blood I pass out
01:37So I'm not looking forward to it. I guess the blood guys coming up here to one day. Can you stop calling him that?
01:43It sounds like he's gonna fucking kill me. Oh nice view smokes. You like that shit. You're really exclusive and two minutes press, please
01:50Yeah, absolutely
01:53Take my blood all the time. I'm a man now one vial you go is it
01:58Once we confirmed Nick didn't have AIDS. I was officially ready to give everyone a tour of Istanbul
02:03Well everyone except for Eddie who said he would meet up with us later. What's wrong with him? That's being Ed
02:08Yeah being a little you or we're in Istanbul. All right, first night was a success I'd say
02:16I mean, I'm slightly too hungover to be leading a group tour of Istanbul, but you know
02:22I'm just gonna wing it Istanbul was founded in like
02:25300 AD and it was called New Rome. It was the capital of the Roman Empire after Rome
02:32All right. I need a dart. Who's smoking a cigarette already. Let's go
02:36Want on down the hoon daddy? Where we going?
02:39I had no idea but it's hard to go wrong when you're in one of the most historically rich cities on earth
02:44I can't kitty. I know Ken Jack's a big history guy. I know Rudy's a history guy
02:49Mehmet the Conqueror took down
02:51Constantinople is where the cannon was first used. Nicky smokes and Eddie not big history guys
02:57I don't even think they know what two continents it straddles
03:04Asia and Africa
03:06Nope, I do not think I could point out Istanbul on a map
03:09I know nothing about the country of Turkey or the city of Istanbul. Is it on water?
03:16Yes, I'd like to see like a nice lake it's not on a lake but it is it's on a sea
03:22the Red Sea
03:24No
03:30One of us is gonna get hit by a car I guarantee it. I love this stuff. This is great
03:34Donnie hasn't figured out they're doing a travel series. What the fuck are we doing beautiful day a little windy
03:40But when I was in Chicago, it was 27 degrees. So this is a welcome change of pace
03:44I don't really have to do much tour guiding
03:46I think this city speaks for itself
03:48The first stop on our tour was to get the boys some eats lock burgers one of the city's many iconic street foods
03:54I'll try one because I'm hungry. Wet burgers. I think that's literally what it translates to so they're soaked in this like
04:02Tomato broth. It's kind of like a chicken parm sandwich almost like a swabby Joe, but chicken parm. Yeah, here bump it away
04:08I like to just immerse myself in the culture
04:10So I'll try to adapt in and play along with anything that we find ourselves getting into and I'm looking forward to learning a whole
04:17different way of life two more two
04:20How long it's five?
04:23All right, we are holding up traffic so walking munch yeah walking munch
04:31There's a lot of tower that's the one you made I see last night, right
04:35Special about the tower the tower then we know it was the Genoese tower. They built it and they
04:43Controlled this they've all fucking built it and yeah, I'll fucking all right. Can you guys just appreciate a fucking tower for one?
04:53Right now we're walking down to the water everybody watch your step. It's a steep Street
05:01Miami go
05:05No balls just he said in the pool
05:14The Golden Horn, so this was their natural Harbor and they would put a chain
05:20From here over there when when people tried to invade so no other ships could like come down the horn
05:26Hey guys, let's all walk over here and meet up with this guy
05:30I reached out to a guy on Airbnb about renting a yacht our last day in Turkey
05:33Who turned out to be a fan of barstool and offered to help me show the crew around?
05:37So my mom's circus dad's American born raised USA living here now moved here 2019 foods too good weather's good
05:43You know, I miss USA man
05:52And we're gonna walk across Galata Bridge Galata into old city, okay
05:58That's the real or it that's the original Constantinople. It was the biggest city in the world for 1,500 years
06:03And now it's the largest city in Europe
06:05It is the population here is 25 million people. So Google is a liar 16 million. No
06:16Fishing is 24 7 no matter what even in Corona you'll still find someone sneaking out fishing during that time
06:23Dude, the seafood here is unbelievable
06:25This is the Golden Horn because it's the shape of a horn and it becomes golden at sunset
06:30This is where like all the battles happened over here the cannons and the wars. This is Constantinople
06:39To be out there, right? No
06:48That mosque is very famous it's called Suleymaniye really really cool
06:56I went through a lot of tough things in Cleveland man. So that's what brought me here my troubles
07:00But I'm living my best life now. Thank God, you know went through some, you know opioid stuff
07:05I was in a car accident. You guys know that was bad in the rusty belt line over there, you know
07:10But we're happy now. We're in a good place. We could talk about it and motivate inspire people
07:162019 I came here did my detox got it all out of my system and I was like dude
07:20What am I gonna do with my life? I want to be a tour guide
07:23Yeah, sometimes all you need is a change of scenery yeah a little bit of luck
07:32Is your surgery tomorrow tomorrow, all right, let's go. I think I have free reign just like watch the procedure. Oh, yeah
07:40We are officially in Constantinople Sultan Ahmed aka Old City. We're gonna go into the
07:47Egyptian
07:49Spice market. I'm definitely getting some spice. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I got cash now. I'm like a loaded gun
08:04We want to smell the mental you want to smell it open the sinus or stop the snoring
08:09Oh
08:13I like that. Do you have the Viagra tea? Yes. Come on. Show me inside Dave's gonna go get scammed on some spices
08:21And I have one of these two sure one of each. Are you getting some love tea? I'm getting some love tea
08:27I'm getting some relaxed tea
08:29Actually, you know what? I'll do this that one down there, too. Now. We're here at the spice market drinking some love tea, but
08:36What I use to have more exciting spontaneous sex is Roman Sparks
08:42Roman Sparks dissolve under your tongue and on average get to work in 15 minutes
08:46Plus they stay active in your system for 36 hours
08:49So when aroused you'll get hard without having to wait and do we have a deal for you?
08:54Do you go to Rho code slash bald stool you get $15 off?
08:59Your first reoccurring order of Roman Sparks, so go to the website
09:04Try to find out if Roman Sparks are for you. They're definitely for me and get hooked up and you'll be having
09:10just top-notch
09:12sex all over the world
09:27I got loaded up with some spices
09:30some
09:33Turmeric vacuum-sealed vacuum-sealed some Ottoman spice love tea. There's a vibrancy relaxed tea and
09:41Fluent gout tea
09:43You don't know
09:45But I'm gonna get it you take me as a very unseasoned guy like you're just like a white
09:50Chicken breast no salt. No pepper
09:56On our walk we came across a guy slang in Kokorec a
10:00Popular Turkish dish of seasoned and grilled lamb intestines. I would have one right now. Sure. I'll split one. What are you trying intestine?
10:07Yeah, it's like the most popular sandwich here. It's just chopped up intestines
10:14Which intestine I don't fucking know dude, I don't think there's a big taste difference in the small or the large intestine
10:21Old Ottoman soldiers used to eat this to help repair ligaments. Oh, okay. There's so much collagen in it
10:27Yeah, I don't recommend ever getting it without it being spiced. Yes. Yeah. Yeah, you know, I like spice
10:38Yeah, it's got a good crunch it's got a good spice the aftertaste of intestines is never great
10:46Just good. I think it's good. I
10:49Think I think we're mostly tasting the bread maybe but yeah, I'm having a bubblegum sprite along with it
10:54So it's a lot of new flavors for us
10:57Yeah, that's that's how I do. Yeah, it's really similar
11:03Anybody else one bite
11:07I mean
11:09That's not bad. Oh, it's got a little kick. I like that shit. I need more of that
11:14How are you enjoying the city so far? I do it. It's incredible reminds me a ton of Chicago actually
11:20Very similar so I feel right at home
11:28You
11:32We're about to come up on the Hagia Sophia at its time it was the largest church in the world
11:38It still might have one of the largest domes in the world. It is now a mosque
11:43It's built in like 532 AD
11:47Only took six years to build
11:58You
12:01You impressed it's the most impressive thing I've ever seen in my entire life really no
12:07Okay. Yeah, it's cool looking. I mean for 500 AD. This is like
12:13Yeah, you want to call Eddie
12:16Yo, what's good? Yeah, we're standing right in front of the Hagia Sophia now
12:22Do you know which one is the Hagia Sophia?
12:25It's the giant fucking dome church one of the most famous landmarks
12:32He brought me to Blue Mosque instead of the Hagia, okay
12:37Alright well, thank you for taking care of our guy
12:42Whenever you're free during the rest of market, you're welcome anytime. Okay, cool. Yeah
12:47Easy mistake to make the Blue Mosque and the Hagia. They both have big domes
12:52The G it's Hagia. Okay, so it's not G. Haha. Yeah, it's it's not the Hagia. I thought it was a hot chair
12:59the camp driver was like
13:04Well, there it is dude told me that was Hagia they took me the blue mask
13:10We're gonna go eat I think we're going to a kebab spot over here
13:15Pray for me. Okay. Yep. I'll pray for you buddy. I'm getting picked off left and right
13:20I must look like the American sucker
13:22He's trying to get me to go to a shot, but it was actually nice
13:25But then he did lie to me and tell me that was a Hagia news the Blue Mosque sounds like I come on
13:31And I just you know, we just hung out for a little bit and I tell you my take so far
13:35It's a hilly, Manhattan
13:38But instead of Starbucks and pizza places, it's kebabs and local coffee, right? Yeah, I mean, that's it
13:43woke up
13:45Got a foot massage
13:56We've been snacking all day, but now it was time for a proper meal
14:01Bread is coming
14:12We got a dip plate here and I wanted to look into it so right here, this is eggplant
14:17Are you on acid? That is not eggplant. He said eggplant
14:22Listen let the minister of culture
14:25Smokes, oh, what is this one smokes this?
14:27Green leaf stuffed rice roll wrap dumbfire dumbfire
14:32This is the Anthony Bourdain of our time. The food was in fact dumbfire, but the music inside even better
14:43So it is like every Turkish restaurant is have a lot man
14:57I
15:01Took a Bollywood dancing class at the World Cup. That's how I learned those
15:27I
15:53Don't think I'm gonna eat more food in my entire life
15:55Then I'm going to try to eat during this trip because everything is amazing that performance
15:59I don't think I can go to American restaurant again
16:10Honest review of the trip so far great having a great time
16:14Questions comments concerns. No, you're doing a great job organizing. I need at least one critiques my clothes stink like cigarettes
16:21Okay, that's that's your only critique that is fair
16:25I don't have a single complaint about it other than I want to bring all the dogs home and I just fed up a cat
16:30in the
16:33Like an entire fish, yes. Okay. Yeah like an entire fish. I love the group but sometimes it's gotta run
16:44Adios next stop soccer bar Street hooligans violence. Yes
16:51It's
16:55Turkish Eddie we are heading to the Galatasaray
16:59Pre-game we're gonna
17:01Get after it watch some good football. We also have Man City Liverpool today, which is a big game for our guy Rudy
17:15Medical tourism after we arrived at the bar Street, I decided to rub up the live streaming backpack
17:22Oh, you know, it's serious when a British guy takes the scarf off yes, and it turned into quite a night
17:31Wasn't a good fight you just brought shame to our whole country
17:34Troy media is the only seafood that has previous. All right. So this is the stuffed mussel with rice. That's good clean protein
17:41Oh, what's up? It's white socks day. Okay, okay
17:44Yes. All right. Can I do a little salty action?
17:48Now we're talking
18:02This place rocks
18:10So man cities losing to Liverpool 1-0
18:14This is a must-win game for Rudy's they have been won in their last six matches if they lose this one
18:20They're fucking cool. I want to get Rudy live being bald and his team losing at the same
18:28I'm focused on health and wealth
18:32So the grand scheme of things no matter what happens in this game is sort of inconsequential if he misses us I'm gonna score
18:44Oh
19:00No, what has happened to city man man city got titty fucked by Liverpool which
19:07Honestly, I saw coming. I
19:09Just didn't expect to be behind enemy lines in Turkey
19:13Everyone apparently is cosplaying as a fucking Liverpool fan tough break for Rudy
19:20But on the bright side it was cool to see that Barstool had fans all the way out in Turkey
19:42Oh
20:01Thank you, thank you very much white socks days gonna put that guy in a fucking chokehold
20:05Apparently there's a dance party going on at the the hotel. So we're gonna we're gonna check that out
20:36Nicky smokes kept striking out, but he kept swinging and eventually got a base hit
20:46Then it was time to call it a night as
20:48Half our crew had their hair procedures the following morning and I needed to be there for moral support
20:53Thanks for joining. Love you all tune in next week
20:56When the first half of the group gets on the operating table and goes under the knife in hopes of a new hairline
21:04If you don't get out of here, we're gonna have an insanely big problem. So get out of here