Category
🎮️
GamingTranscript
00:00:00No, thanks that would be criminal vandalism. I'd rather enjoy this moonlight than the lights of a cell
00:00:21Twinkies are fortunate. They do not qualify for examination
00:00:25To think someone would move the car from its established position
00:00:30Into a prohibited spot no less
00:00:52Mike I have returned
00:00:55nightly greetings Betty
00:00:57What seems to be the pickle?
00:01:00So
00:01:05What's in this gloopy thing a
00:01:08variety of homogenized ingredients
00:01:10Blended and denuded of any flavor or texture
00:01:15Okay, and how do you make it first we place a selection of brussels sprouts in the sun for a few hours?
00:01:23Meanwhile we take aged soy milk strain it and collect the solidified chunks of bean curd
00:01:31Once the sprouts have finished fermenting and have rested until they are no longer volatile
00:01:38We simmer the bean curd in their liquid
00:01:42After the bean curd and sprouts have cooled into a harmonious solution
00:01:47It's ready to be served with our special broccoli topping
00:01:53And
00:01:58You guys eat that
00:02:03Please Betty don't let me eat another spoonful of that thing I
00:02:06Swear if I do I'll bite my own ass just so I can experience flavor again
00:02:12Mr.. Slim these statements are very unorderly
00:02:16Though not inaccurate
00:02:22So people actually come here to eat that gloopy thing I mean, I don't see any customers here
00:02:28Miss Jones, and I are in charge of home deliveries
00:02:32We bring gloopy right to your doorstep. Let's say I'm away when it's gloopy time what happens
00:02:39No matter where you are
00:02:41We will find you and we will feed you
00:02:46Nothing shall prevent us from providing our fellow citizens with their daily intake of nutrients
00:02:52What if I refuse to eat that thing it would be highly unorderly to refuse
00:03:00Besides you have not complained about your daily intakes for the past
00:03:051094 servings
00:03:07What you mean to tell me I've been eating this stuff for a whole year
00:03:12Betty the fact that you of all people have somehow managed to reach this conclusion by yourself is most unorderly
00:03:20Please attend re-examination at your earliest convenience. This is what I get for thinking
00:03:28Mike are you completely sure the iguana in the kitchen is dead yes?
00:03:32I am quite positive
00:03:35Really because I swear it moved just a second ago. That is most unorderly
00:03:41Allow me to confirm this
00:03:44Oh
00:03:46Okay, I think I should stop asking questions. I'm starting to feel like I'm digging my own grave here
00:03:58Iguana please respond
00:04:00Hmm
00:04:06How peculiar I believe there was a knife here just a few moments ago a knife here
00:04:14Nah, that was just your mind playing tricks on you
00:04:18That or the fumes from gloopy. Ah yes the side effects. I will attempt to remain orderly until they pass
00:04:26Thank you, Betty
00:04:28No, thank you for the knife
00:04:58I
00:05:08Have received more reports of cryptic message sightings
00:05:12Once I even found my vehicle covered in them at first I suspected that drifter outsider
00:05:18But he has not been sighted for months
00:05:21Regardless we are too fast and sharp for the incident to ever repeat itself
00:05:29Wait, what is this in my notebook if you're so fast and sharp?
00:05:35Why didn't you catch us riding this dummy?
00:05:41Goddamn chipmunks got me again
00:05:46Correction my unorderly self they got us again
00:05:59I
00:06:12Attempting to relocate the junkyard assets would be highly unorderly
00:06:23Where would I go with it?
00:06:28Where would I go with it? Where would I go with it?
00:06:37Hey Linda guess who's back me nightly greetings Betty what seems to be the pickle
00:06:50There's something odd about you, but I can't seem to put my finger on it
00:06:54I am behaving perfectly reasonably Betty
00:06:58In fact, I have an upsurge of joy when I recall your invaluable cooperation in fixing the generator
00:07:05See, here's the thing. I can't tell if you're being sarcastic right now, Betty
00:07:10I would never use sarcasm while conversing with you. That would be unorderly of me
00:07:16See, that's exactly what I'm talking about
00:07:24I
00:07:30Think I'm good for now a fond farewell Betty
00:07:38Community has informed us that you were behaving outside stipulated parameters
00:07:44Please proceed to re-examination immediately
00:07:50Remember when I said we were asking too many questions
00:07:54Yeah, buddy. This is totally on you
00:07:58Mr. Hardy certainly has a large parking violation debt to clear
00:08:08Elizabeth Anderson, you must attend re-examination immediately. Please come with us
00:08:15Yeah, right. You're gonna have to catch me first
00:08:24You
00:08:54I
00:09:24I
00:09:42Don't think I have anything else to talk about for now, I don't think I have anything else to talk about for now
00:09:50Let's leave the chit-chat for later
00:09:54I
00:09:57Accepting weird, I'd best not test my luck
00:10:04Lucky country-style chicken
00:10:08Walker family homemade soda a Walker family tradition and the original wonder tonic of the American West
00:10:14This carbonated wonder is infused with lithium citrate South American herbs
00:10:19Ephedra bread seed poppy Mexican and Indian hemp
00:10:22Devils trumpet seeds stricken in and ergot it lifts the spirits relieves mental and physical exhaustion and cures lumbago gout and
00:10:30hemorrhoids
00:10:33They haven't invented the vaccines I'd need to survive that kitchen
00:10:37Mike's eyes are telling me no, but my body my body's telling me no as well
00:11:07Vandalism being caught hot. There's a motel and a gas station here
00:11:37It's empty like my wallet
00:11:49Oh, I totally would but I fear Ben would disagree with my intentions lethally
00:11:55Oh
00:12:04And who would you be a little fella
00:12:08Of course I'm talking to you, there's no one else in that bathtub
00:12:11Quack quack quack quack quack. You know me, but you have me at a disadvantage
00:12:18mister
00:12:20quack quack quack
00:12:22Professor Gordon Bombay from San Diego's Palomar Observatory. What are you doing up there professor?
00:12:29quack quack quack quack
00:12:31Checking the autochthonous constellations of the region. Ah, I see
00:12:39Hmm I think this chicken is taking me for a fool. My recommendation is to proceed with caution
00:12:47Who are you really and what are you doing in that tub?
00:12:50Quack quack quack quack quack. Oh my god, that's horrible
00:12:55But it kind of makes sense. A lot of people think chicken legs work as charms
00:13:00quack quack quack quack quack quack
00:13:03quack
00:13:05Okay, mr. Ducklin Manson, I can buy the cultist stuff but the sonic quack what kind of idiot do you take me for
00:13:15No, no, please don't do it don't sonic quack me I'll do whatever you want
00:13:20I
00:13:28Just please don't kill me
00:13:34You son of a bird
00:13:41Stop dodging the question. Who are you really? And what are you doing in that tub?
00:13:46quack quack
00:13:48Quack-a-quack-quack. Quack-quack.
00:13:51Movie? What movie?
00:13:53Quack. Quack-quack-quack-quack. Quack.
00:13:57Well, Mr. Quacky-Chan, if you're really that famous, tell me one movie you've ever been in.
00:14:05Oh, jeez, what am I saying?
00:14:09I can't remember any movies.
00:14:12Wait, are you lying again?
00:14:14Quack.
00:14:15Oh, wow. Hey, if you need any more talent for your movie, I would be perfect.
00:14:20Quack. Quack-quack-quack. Quack-quack.
00:14:24Watering the plants on set?
00:14:26Quack-quack-quack.
00:14:29I can't believe he got me again.
00:14:39Enough with the lies. I demand to know who you are and what you are doing in that stupid tub.
00:14:44Quack. Quack-quack-quack.
00:14:47What enchantment are you talking about?
00:14:50Quack-quack-quack-quack. Quack.
00:14:53What? A batch of cursed birdseed turned you from a charming prince into a confused rooster?
00:14:58Quack. Quack-quack. Quack-quack. Quack.
00:15:02Okay, I'll bite. How can I help you break the curse?
00:15:06Quack. Quack-quack. Quack. Quack-quack-quack.
00:15:10Only a deep, passionate French kiss can break the spell?
00:15:14Okay, first, gross. Second, I don't need riches. I'm pretty sure my mom is loaded.
00:15:20But tell you what, if you explain what you're doing in that tub, I'll consider it.
00:15:26Quack. Quack-quack-quack-quack.
00:15:29The tub is surrounded by an impenetrable field of magic and the only way to break it is with a kiss?
00:15:34Prince quacking my butt, you just told me the curse was you being turned into an animal.
00:15:39Quack.
00:15:41You know he's making fun of us, but you keep coming back for more.
00:15:48Okay, that does it. You're going to tell me who you are and what you're doing up there and you're going to do it now.
00:15:53Quack. Quack-quack-quack.
00:15:56I can't handle the truth. You can't handle the truth.
00:16:00Quack-quack-quack. Quack-quack-quack-quack-quack-quack. Quack.
00:16:05Grim Fanducky? A reaper sent by the Guild of Weavers?
00:16:09Like hell I'm letting you claim my soul.
00:16:12Quack.
00:16:35Elysium to home secure.
00:16:37Debilitasias.
00:16:39Libertatis veri.
00:16:41Terro camus.
00:16:43Adenos de Superman.
00:16:52Whoa, dude, you should probably get that cough checked out.
00:16:56Quack-quack-quack-quack.
00:16:58Ah, give up, buddy. We're never going to outsmart this duck.
00:17:02Quack.
00:17:05Last chance, rooster.
00:17:07Either you tell me who you are and what you're doing there or I'm having Duck a la Ranche tonight.
00:17:13Quack.
00:17:15Don't test me.
00:17:17Quack. Quack-quack-quack. Quack.
00:17:21Well, Ducky, next time save me the theatrics and just tell me that you're helping Ben flavor the moonshine.
00:17:29Geez, why'd you have to make it so complicated?
00:17:31Quack-quack-quack.
00:17:33Yeah, I also hate when idiots ask me stupid questions.
00:17:39Hey!
00:17:41Quack.
00:17:43Game, set, match, Ducky!
00:17:53I think you've been in that tub long enough.
00:17:55Quack.
00:17:57Quack-quack-quack-quack.
00:17:59Look, there are a lot of eagles around here.
00:18:01They strike so fast. Blink and you're dinner.
00:18:05Quack-quack.
00:18:07Look, quack gun.
00:18:09No way, man.
00:18:11Ben would never so much as aim at something so patriotic, let alone shoot it.
00:18:16But you're right. An eagle probably won't get you.
00:18:19It'll be the bears.
00:18:21Quack.
00:18:23Oh, you didn't know?
00:18:25We're dealing with a severe infestation of rare New Mexican climbing bears.
00:18:29They're angry, hungry, and of course, very good at climbing.
00:18:33So, best of luck, pal.
00:18:35Quack.
00:18:37Quack-quack.
00:18:39Well, even if the bear doesn't get to you, there's always the...
00:18:41Nah, I don't want to scare you.
00:18:43Quack.
00:18:45Quack.
00:18:47Quack-quack.
00:18:49You must know, as we speak, a cybernetic organism from the future has arrived in our little town.
00:18:57Its sole purpose is to roast you into extinction.
00:19:02Quack-quack-quack-quack-quack.
00:19:06You'd do well to be afraid, because no matter what you do, once you're in his sights, there is no escape.
00:19:13He is fearless, relentless, and unstoppable.
00:19:18So, if you see a rooster riding a motorcycle, shotgun in hand, know that you are about to meet your end at the hands of...
00:19:27The Quackinator!
00:19:30Quack-quack-quack-quack.
00:19:32Quack-quack-quack-quack.
00:19:37Quack.
00:19:44Dun-dun-dun-dun-dun.
00:19:49Dun-dun-dun-dun-dun.
00:19:54I shouldn't touch that. I got a bad feeling about it.
00:20:00Pay before you pump, or you'll get a couple of pumps from my shotgun. Management.
00:20:05I've had enough shocks for one night.
00:20:36Being caught hot-wiring this beauty is a one-way ticket to hell.
00:20:54It's a good thing I'm not a quack.
00:20:57I'm a quack.
00:20:59I'm a quack.
00:21:02It's empty.
00:21:04Please be advised of the following side effects associated with gloofy consumption in carbon-based life forms.
00:21:11Nausea, headache, loss of appetite, seizure, spontaneous cellular degeneration, and death.
00:21:19If you are experiencing any of these symptoms, please report to the recycling facility immediately.
00:21:31Hello, Ravioli. Remember me?
00:21:50Nightly greetings, Betty.
00:21:52What seems to be the pickle?
00:21:57Sorry about taking all that stuff from your safe.
00:22:01We already know you have not taken anything from us, as that would be highly unorderly.
00:22:08And deadly!
00:22:10What my companion is trying to say is that provided your behavior does not cause distress or disharmony, you will not require re-examination.
00:22:21All is forgiven! Gotcha! You guys are the nicest mafiosi I know.
00:22:26Mafiosi? My official designation is Phenotypic Maintenance Technician.
00:22:31I am the Aesthetic Integrity Enforcer. If you see any stray hairs, make sure to report them to me.
00:22:42Capiche?
00:22:44Since you guys don't care about material stuff, how about you live here and I'll move into your big fancy mansion?
00:22:54Indeed. Material possessions are irrelevant to us.
00:22:58Sweet! I'll just go and-
00:23:00In fact, our community recognizes materialism as a highly unorderly behavior.
00:23:07Perhaps you require us to advance your re-examination date?
00:23:11Oh, no, no, no, no. I'm perfectly fine.
00:23:15Absolutely no materialism here. I totally hate, uh, stuff. Nightly farewell, I guess.
00:23:23Likewise.
00:23:38I'd rather not spend the night in a cell.
00:23:55I'd rather not get myself into trouble.
00:23:59I'd rather not get myself arrested, thank you.
00:24:29I know I'm not permitted to make unauthorized changes, but this garage is terribly unorderly.
00:24:43In the interest of improving my work efficiency, I did organize a f-f-f-f-f-f-few!
00:24:50Hey, who's been screwing with my tools? I had those just the way I liked them!
00:24:55Thankfully, a small change like that would be barely noticeable to anyone else.
00:25:25How's it hanging, Max?
00:25:51Sh-sh-sh-sh-sh-sh-shh! Keep your voice down!
00:25:59Would it I need to awaken the evil powers of that book again?
00:26:02Look, if I just tell you, then the curse will transfer itself to me!
00:26:07And, honestly, I don't think I can handle any more bad luck!
00:26:11But here's what I can tell you.
00:26:13A pagan priest must curse a stream that flows into a moonless night.
00:26:19Curse stream and darkness. Got it.
00:26:24Well, see you later, Max.
00:26:26I won't stay here for long, so who knows?
00:26:50You better have a tetanus shot ready for me if you want me to touch that.
00:27:16If you want to get something off your chest,
00:27:18I suggest talking to the priest.
00:27:24Hello, Father. There are some more things I want to talk about.
00:27:27Knightly greetings, Betty. What seems to be the pickle?
00:27:34I gotta go.
00:27:35Then safe partings to you, Betty. May order be with you.
00:27:48I'm not messing with a crime scene.
00:27:50Eww! For real?
00:28:10I'm not messing with a crime scene.
00:28:12Eww! For real?
00:28:18Too soon.
00:28:21I've done enough breaking and entering for one night.
00:28:49Dun-dun-dun-dun-dun!
00:29:04Eight thousand pardons, Miss Potential Client.
00:29:07But should you feel that can without providing payment first,
00:29:10I will be forced to stop you by making use of this trusty double barrel.
00:29:15I will be forced to stop you by making use of this trusty double barrel shotgun.
00:29:36I have the feeling that messing with this car comes with a second hole in the butt.
00:29:40Free of charge.
00:29:45This note is right where it belongs. In the wild.
00:30:15This note is right where it belongs. In the wild. In the wild.
00:30:45This note is right where it belongs. In the wild. In the wild.
00:31:16Oh, Solitare Juvenis, Sancte Milito, Re Innocentiam Tutor, Exurge!
00:31:22Prebi mihi dulcem vehelam ut terram per scruta latebraque per veteres inveniam!
00:31:28Prebi mihi dulcem vehelam ut terram per scruta latebraque per veteres inveniam!
00:31:41Hello, Betty. I am the Hardy Industries 3000, but you may call me Hit.
00:31:47I can do anything you require of me.
00:31:50Cool! A talking car! Can you take me to my mom?
00:31:54I am not qualified to overrule her wishes, which means I can't take you to your mother, Betty.
00:32:00Oh, so then you can't do everything I require.
00:32:13Hit!
00:32:15Well, that was a huge disappointment.
00:32:24You're wasting your time, buddy.
00:32:34O nobilis pannos e archeculum!
00:32:37O nobilis pannos e archeculum!
00:32:41O nobilis pannos e archeculum exaudime!
00:32:45Vastis patii ac temporis pervehere!
00:32:48Dona mihi scientiam ut discipiam extemporate latebra!
00:32:59Re-examine it! Re-examine it!
00:33:06Uh, hello? Anyone there?
00:33:11Just me. Uh, I'm a doctor, by the way.
00:33:14Doctor? What?
00:33:16Yes, yes, nice to meet you too. Now, do you need anything? Because I'm kind of busy here.
00:33:21Re-examine it! Re-examine it!
00:33:28Yeah, actually, have you seen my mom?
00:33:31You think your mother would be here at the end of space and time?
00:33:36I mean, maybe?
00:33:38That's ridiculous. Wait, wait a minute. Is your mother a nice parent?
00:33:42Yeah.
00:33:43I haven't seen her since our trip to London. Thankfully.
00:33:47Aww.
00:33:48I'm sorry. I really have to go, but before I do, one thing.
00:33:54When you do find your mother, please remind her that I am not allowed to vote in your dimension.
00:34:01Good luck, Betty.
00:34:03Bye! Wait, how do you know my...
00:34:09...
00:34:19Sorry, buddy. It says, limit one per customer.
00:34:24A crushed soul and... an unbelievably sharp sword?
00:34:29Not sure I can find those at Lorraine's.
00:34:33A crushed soul and... not sure I...
00:34:38A sinner's skull, the wing of a fallen angel, and the tears of God?
00:34:45What kind of cookbook is this?
00:35:03...
00:35:13Uh, sorry to interrupt your dinner, miss.
00:35:16Betty! Betty!
00:35:18Uh, yeah, that's right. I'm Betty. Have you seen my mom?
00:35:22Wicked! Fricksy! False!
00:35:25Yes, but you didn't have to be so harsh about it. Anyway, have you seen my...
00:35:29Ooh, what's that shiny thing you've got there? Can I have it?
00:35:33No! Nasty pranking Bettyses!
00:35:38Leave now, and never come back!
00:35:42Okay, okay!
00:35:45We told her to go away, and away she goes, precious!
00:35:53Huh. She seemed kind of familiar.
00:36:00...
00:36:05You're wasting your time, buddy.
00:36:09An intentionally blank space?
00:36:30...
00:36:36Uh, hey, sorry to interrupt, but you guys wouldn't happen to have seen my mom, would you?
00:36:41We're in the middle of a fight! Get lost!
00:36:45Come on, that's no way to talk to people.
00:36:48Oh, I'm sorry, I don't think we've seen her around.
00:36:51Hey, I know! We could ask the dragon!
00:36:54You idiot! You can't just use those to solve every problem!
00:36:58Well, it was worth a try, I guess. Good luck with your battle!
00:37:02Thanks! Good luck finding your mom!
00:37:06...
00:37:22Klaatu varada! Uh, uh, nektai?
00:37:26I can't read the last word. Nectar? Noodle? Nickel? Eh, I'm sure no one will notice.
00:37:33Klaatu varada ni...
00:37:36Juice! Yeah, nailed it.
00:37:45No, you did not. And with this great honor, you have unleashed me from my hellish prison.
00:37:52Mwahahahaha!
00:37:55Betty, you've doomed us all! Fire will rain down from the skies and rivers will run red with blood!
00:38:05But don't worry, there's still time! Just cut off your hand and cast it into the portal! Quickly!
00:38:12Um, no? It's just that I'm pretty attached to both of my hands.
00:38:17Curses! Foiled by Betty!
00:38:21Curse you, Betty Anderson! Curse you!
00:38:26AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
00:38:43Find all five ingredients, and form a pet. Find the recited, profit. Support your lo-
00:38:49Animarum perquisitor, damnationes fuscator!
00:38:59Vincite voluntas praetoris ad reveniendum!
00:39:03Scopum deponeme, Hercule!
00:39:06Veniam dato!
00:39:19Wow, now that's what I call an entrance.
00:39:27Is that you, Mistress Eliza?
00:39:30You have returned from your trip to the desert earlier than expected.
00:39:34Have you perhaps forgotten something inside the research room?
00:39:38Wait, he thinks I'm mom?
00:39:41And what is she doing in the desert?
00:39:42Hmm, I should probably check out that research room.
00:39:46Maybe I'll find some answers there.
00:39:48Is something amiss, Mistress?
00:39:53Yes, Bucky, it is I, your beloved Mayor Barret.
00:40:02I am many things, obsessed with bureaucracy, a lover of all things dull and unexciting,
00:40:10and a consummate offspring ignorer.
00:40:14But what I am not is someone capable of opening that door.
00:40:18That's why, in the spirit of community togetherness, I implore you to let loose the keys of access
00:40:26and embrace our new open door feuta!
00:40:31Apologies, Mistress, I am having difficulty identifying the request in that speech.
00:40:38Just open the damn door, Bucky.
00:40:40Yes, Mistress.
00:41:10Dear Eliza, it always hurts to say goodbye.
00:41:19I'm leaving you.
00:41:20For the weekend!
00:41:21I hope you didn't stop at the I'm leaving you, or I'll be in trouble when I get back.
00:41:27Anyway, I'm just going fishing at my parents' lake house.
00:41:30It would be nice to have you here so we could enjoy some quality time together.
00:41:34You know, away from Betty.
00:41:37Just imagine swimming naked under the stars as they shine only for us.
00:41:43And if that's not sexy enough, we could try shotgun fishing too.
00:41:47I wish your love for me was bigger than your hatred for Corona.
00:41:50But the offer's on the table anyway.
00:41:52Love, Lincoln.
00:41:54P.S.
00:41:55So you won't get lonely, I left you something to remember me by.
00:42:00But you can't take it out of the envelope until you answer this riddle.
00:42:04Underwear, underwear.
00:42:06Where have I left my underwear?
00:42:08What the?
00:42:11Ewww!
00:42:12Come on, Mom.
00:42:14You can't just leave these lying around.
00:42:27Eliza Barrett.
00:42:29Eliza Barrett.
00:42:32Your family is looking for you.
00:42:35Come to town hall right now, missy, or you'll be grounded for a year.
00:42:46Ooh, button!
00:42:47And it's a nice big red one.
00:42:49Should I press it?
00:42:51Nah.
00:42:53Haven't movies taught you anything?
00:42:55You should not press big red buttons.
00:42:58Listen, if you want to push something, can you maybe just boop your own nose?
00:43:03What if we're all just cartoons on TV and this is the off button for the remote control?
00:43:10Let's think this through for a moment.
00:43:12This is in my mom's office.
00:43:15What if pushing it cuts my allowance in half?
00:43:18Wait, what if pushing it doubles my allowance?
00:43:21Hmm, decisions, decisions.
00:43:26What if it's one of those slapstick gags and a giant anvil falls on me?
00:43:33No, seriously, we could break something, and I don't think Linda is in the mood to fix stuff.
00:43:42What if it opens another portal?
00:43:44To hell.
00:43:46Or what if it's not just hell, but broccoli hell?
00:43:50Okay, fine, go ahead.
00:43:53Make me push it.
00:43:54Just remember one thing.
00:43:56I tried to warn you.
00:43:58Whatever happens now is 100% on you, pal.
00:44:03Aw, crap baskets! Told you something would happen.
00:44:07This whole noir vibe is neat and all, but it might be a bit too murky for our game.
00:44:12Let me see if I can fix it.
00:44:15Out of the frying pan and into the... whatever the heck this is.
00:44:19At least I could tell the floor from the table last time.
00:44:22I can barely make out the button.
00:44:24Let's try again.
00:44:26Whoa!
00:44:29Not gonna lie, I love the retro look.
00:44:33Still, I'd rather go back to HD.
00:44:37Whoa!
00:44:41I guess this must be what happens when you drink a whole bottle of Mike's groovy ketchup.
00:44:46Far out, man.
00:44:48Well, let's take another shot at this.
00:44:52Aw, sweet! Everything looks like a comic book!
00:44:55Can we stay like this?
00:44:57Betty?
00:44:59Come on! I'll be Super Prankster with my loyal sidekick, Wretched Lynn.
00:45:03Together we...
00:45:04No, Betty.
00:45:05Aw.
00:45:08Oh, shoot.
00:45:10See? This is what happens when I do what you tell me to do.
00:45:13Now what? Am I gonna be a doodle forever?
00:45:16Come on, buddy. Do something nice for once and press that button, would ya?
00:45:25Call for you, Eliza Barrett.
00:45:28Mayor Eliza Barrett.
00:45:30If anyone has seen her, please help her find her way back to Town Hall.
00:45:35She's getting to that age where she gets confused easily.
00:45:44Ms. Eliza Barrett.
00:45:47Someone has found your beloved, beautiful wife.
00:45:51Ms. Eliza Barrett.
00:45:53Someone has found your beloved, beautiful, and amazing daughter.
00:45:58She's waiting for you at Town Hall.
00:46:01Come get her now, please.
00:46:06Well, just because Mom's not in town doesn't mean I can't have some fun with this thing.
00:46:12Okay, Mom. Here's what's gonna happen.
00:46:15You're gonna come back here, tell me what a wonderful daughter I am,
00:46:20and raise my allowance by at least 5%.
00:46:23Because if you don't, I'm gonna burn down everything in your office.
00:46:28Starting with that creepy book that keeps looking at me funny.
00:46:31Time's a-wastin'.
00:46:36Mom, I fixed the dam! And I did it all by myself.
00:46:40Come tell me how proud you are.
00:46:44Mom, the Mafia's got me. Again.
00:46:48I'm saying that if their demands aren't met,
00:46:50they see a cop in the area, or even a single florid of broccoli,
00:46:54they will start killing hostages.
00:46:57By the way, not to alarm you or anything, but I'm the only hostage.
00:47:00So please, this would be the time to show you care.
00:47:05Attention, Eliza Barrett. This is Dr. Feel-Peachy-Belly-Good speaking.
00:47:09Your daughter has been diagnosed with a terminal illness.
00:47:13We have induced her into a coma in order to preserve her life.
00:47:17If you wish for us to administer treatment,
00:47:19you must come to town hall right now and approve all the paperwork.
00:47:25Attention, Health Inspector. Please grab your biohazard suit and head to Mike's Diner.
00:47:29Good luck. You'll be in our thoughts and prayers.
00:47:32You'll never get me alive!
00:47:35A direct line of communication from me to the townsfolk.
00:47:40Privyet, comrades. Your town now is under the control of Mother Russia.
00:47:45Look for crazy man named Benzin. He is great enemy of Russian people.
00:47:51If you see crazy man, please bring him to gas station.
00:47:55It's now Soviet headquarters.
00:47:58Spasiba.
00:48:04Attention, my good people.
00:48:07Mayor Barrett's fascist dictatorship has gone on long enough.
00:48:11We demand retribution!
00:48:13The people are ready for change!
00:48:15And you can't spell change without the letters B and A!
00:48:22Well, you can't spell it without A.
00:48:24Anyway, vote for Betty.
00:48:30Oh, I'm Mayor Barrett.
00:48:33I'm Lincoln, the dumb guy with stupid underwear.
00:48:37Oh my god, you're so hot.
00:48:40Let's make out and ignore my daughter.
00:48:43That sounds great. Also, I'm an idiot.
00:48:46Me too!
00:48:57Bike, bike, bicycle!
00:48:59Part, part, particle!
00:49:01Verse, verse, versicle!
00:49:03Test, test, testing!
00:49:08That was fun, but I think I've had enough for today.
00:49:11That was fun, but I think I've had enough for today.
00:49:18I'm not going anywhere until I find out where mom is.
00:49:25I think the decorations look fine as they are.
00:49:28Out of all the places to mark in the 48 states,
00:49:30Out of all the places to mark in the 48 states,
00:49:32someone chose Corona, New Mexico.
00:49:34What could possibly be important there?
00:49:37Mother of a prankster!
00:49:38Did mom go see her boyfriend while I almost died fixing the dam?
00:49:43I'm mad!
00:49:45Okay, pal. Time to look for some wheels because we're going to be late.
00:49:49I'm going to be late.
00:49:51I'm going to be late.
00:49:53I'm going to be late.
00:49:55I'm going to be late.
00:49:56Time to look for some wheels because we're going on a trip!
00:50:04I really need to get to Corona.
00:50:06I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:50:26I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:50:28I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:50:30I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:50:32I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:50:34I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:50:36I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:50:38I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:50:40I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:50:42I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:50:44I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:50:46I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:50:48I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:50:50I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:50:52I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:50:54I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:50:56I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:50:58I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:00I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:02I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:04I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:06I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:08I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:10I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:12I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:14I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:16I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:18I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:20I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:22I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:24I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:26I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:28I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:30I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:32I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:34I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:36I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:38I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:40I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:42I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:44I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:46I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:48I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:50I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:52I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:54I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:56I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:51:58I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:00I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:02I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:04I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:06I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:08I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:10I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:12I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:14I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:16I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:18I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:20I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:22I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:24I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:26I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:28I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:30I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:32I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:34I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:36I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:38I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:40I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:42I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:44I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:46I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:48I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:50I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:52I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:54I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:56I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:52:58I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:00I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:02I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:04I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:06I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:08I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:10I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:12I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:14I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:16I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:18I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:20I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:22I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:24I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:26I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:28I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:30I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:32I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:34I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:36I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:38I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:40I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:42I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:44I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:46I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:48I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:50I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:52I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:54I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:56I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:53:58I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:00I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:02I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:04I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:06I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:08I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:10I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:12I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:14I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:16I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:18I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:20I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:22I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:24I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:26I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:28I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:30I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:32I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:34I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:36I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:38I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:40I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:42I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:44I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:46I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:48I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:50I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:52I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:54I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:56I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:54:58I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:00I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:02I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:04I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:06I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:08I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:10I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:12I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:14I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:16I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:18I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:20I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:22I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:24I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:26I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:28I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:30I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:32I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:34I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:36I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:38I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:40I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:42I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:44I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:46I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:48I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:50I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:52I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:54I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:56I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:55:58I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:56:00I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:56:02I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:56:04I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:56:06I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:56:08I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:56:10I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:56:12I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:56:14I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:56:16I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:56:18I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:56:20I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:56:22I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:56:24I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:56:26I should check out that car in Linda's workshop.
00:56:28This cake coupon is from Mike's Diner.
00:56:30You sure about this, buddy?
00:56:32Sure as a man can be.
00:56:34In that case I want the keys upfront,
00:56:36just in case your body is not ready.
00:56:38I'm definitely ready for my surprise!
00:56:40I'm definitely ready for my surprise!
00:56:42Whatever that means.
00:56:44I just wanted to catch up with you.
00:56:46You know, what you've been up to,
00:56:48the places you've seen.
00:56:51Oh look at you.
00:56:53Mocking an innocent man.
00:56:54You mocking an innocent man!
00:57:24Hey Mike, can I have a cake?
00:57:31I am unable to comply with your request. Cake is not an authorized comestible.
00:57:37But I have a coupon!
00:57:43Wouldn't it be just as unorderly to not give me the food I have a coupon for?
00:57:47You make a good point, Betty. Do you have any special requests?
00:57:54Why don't you just surprise me?
00:57:56The customer is always right!
00:58:24I don't get what's so surprising about this cake.
00:58:46While the rations are nutritionally perfect, they lack—
00:58:50What could have happened to these people? I've been away for a couple hours at most!
00:59:20I told you I'd be back!
00:59:36Your persistence has been noted.
00:59:39So, what are you doing here exactly?
00:59:42I am performing my assigned duty of not permitting community members to access this area.
00:59:47Aww, not even good ol' Betty!
00:59:50That is correct.
00:59:52But I helped fix it!
00:59:54You have performed a valuable service for our community.
00:59:57Now please leave this restricted area immediately.
01:00:01That's what I get for helping!
01:00:14Hey Hank!
01:00:15What's the pickle? Nightly greetings. I do so love our friendly meetings.
01:00:25Do you know anything about Corona?
01:00:27Do not utter that name! It brings the wrong kind of fame.
01:00:32So you know where it is?
01:00:34I will not reveal its location. Doing so is grounds for re-examination.
01:00:40Come on Hank, you can tell me! I can keep a secret!
01:00:43The nearest city is forbidden. This order cannot be overridden.
01:00:47Forbidden? By whom?
01:00:49Betty, cease this interaction. You are committing an infraction.
01:00:54Okay, okay. Wow, dramatic much?
01:01:02How long's it gonna take for Bucky to paint that bench?
01:01:05Lend me your ear. The answer is unclear.
01:01:08Well, I could really use that paint.
01:01:10If you require his tools, just ask. But you must wait until he's completed his task.
01:01:16Ugh, any way he'll get done sooner?
01:01:19He will not stop in his quest. Not until he is scheduled to rest.
01:01:26Could you play a song for me, Hank?
01:01:28I am happy beyond measure. What kind of song would be your pleasure?
01:01:41Something calm, like rustling leaves.
01:01:44This will be a great display. Now stand back and watch me play.
01:02:10Snoring
01:03:10Playing music
01:03:20Now, let's just paint over our little freedom blue car with a nice shade of revolution.
01:03:41Splash
01:03:47That's nice, but it's going to need a little friend.
01:04:01Twinkle, twinkle, little star, you now have a commie car!
01:04:10Twinkle, twinkle, little star, you now have a commie car!
01:04:15Everyone has a role determined by a central authority?
01:04:19Wait, there is something unorderly about this pickup truck.
01:04:25I don't recall it being...
01:04:27Red!
01:04:33No! No! No! This can't be happening!
01:04:41Hold tight, my sweet. Stay with me. Don't you dare leave me. This is just a bad dream.
01:04:51Crying
01:04:55Wake the hell up!
01:05:04Ow!
01:05:12No!
01:05:19You tarnished her, you goddamn commie bastards!
01:05:25Wait until I catch those damn Bolshevik baboons!
01:05:32Don't worry, Lucille. I can still fix this.
01:05:35All I need is a brush, and some blue paint, and some stars.
01:05:39She needs stars. I just gotta find 47 more and she'll be okay.
01:05:44Crying
01:06:00Who am I kidding? There's no way I can fix this. The paint's already drying.
01:06:05Please, God, I beg you, take me instead. But don't take her from me.
01:06:15Lucille!
01:06:22There's only one thing left to do. I'll always love you, Lucille.
01:06:44Goodbye, my sweetheart. Now you can rest in heaven's junkyard.
01:06:51Amazing grace, how sweet the sound. That saved a wretch like me.
01:07:08I once was lost, but now am found.
01:07:22This isn't just weird, it's downright bizarre. No one is acting like themselves.
01:07:29Oh, I totally would, but I fear Ben would disagree with my intentions. Lethally.
01:07:49Hey Ben, mind if I help myself to some gas?
01:07:58I'll take that whining as a no.
01:08:18I have the feeling that messing with this car comes with a second hole in the butt. Free of charge.
01:08:29I'll be right back.
01:08:32Well, that was highly unorderly. After I complete my rocking chair patrol duty, I must submit myself for re-examination immediately.
01:09:02He's been through enough. Let him read in peace.
01:09:32Alright, I got your cake. Happy Jailiversary, Lazlo.
01:09:58Oh, you got me the one with the surprise, right?
01:10:07Take a guess.
01:10:08Hand it over.
01:10:12Uh-uh. Not so fast. Where are the keys?
01:10:15Well, if you can't trust an inmate, who can you trust? The police? The government?
01:10:21Enough with the conspiracy theories. You get cake, I get keys. That was the deal.
01:10:27Ugh, fine.
01:10:35Pleasure doing business with you. Now, if you don't mind, I've got some cake to eat. In peace.
01:10:43Oh, come on, come on. Where's my surprise?
01:10:55Ha-ha! There you are.
01:10:58I can't wait to see Amos' face when he sees that I'm gone.
01:11:14Man, that's a full 180. That cake sure put him in a good mood.
01:11:33Oh, damn! These things are amazingly easy to file through.
01:11:44Huh, does this mean Mike's cakes are actually... good?
01:11:49But then I'd have to try a piece.
01:11:52Yeah, I think I'd rather not take that risk.
01:11:59Man, that's a full 180. That cake sure put him in a good mood.
01:12:14I'm gonna be free! Free! Oh, I can almost taste it!
01:12:20Oh, it's taking a lot of blood, sweat, tears, bloopy, and a car.
01:12:25But I'm finally getting the hell out of here!
01:12:43Oh, I can almost taste it!
01:12:46Oh, it's taking a lot of blood, sweat, tears, bloopy, and a car.
01:12:49But I'm finally getting the hell out of here!
01:12:52Oh, it's taking a lot of blood, sweat, tears, bloopy, and a car.
01:12:55Oh, it's taking a lot of blood, sweat, tears, bloopy, and a car.
01:12:58Oh, it's taking a lot of blood, sweat, tears, bloopy, and a car.
01:13:01Oh, it's taking a lot of blood, sweat, tears, bloopy, and a car.
01:13:04Oh, it's taking a lot of blood, sweat, tears, bloopy, and a car.
01:13:07Oh, it's taking a lot of blood, sweat, tears, bloopy, and a car.
01:13:11All right! Fueled up and ready to rumble!
01:13:14All right! Fueled up and ready to rumble!
01:13:21Ready to leave town?
01:13:24No need to drag all this stuff around.
01:13:27But I'll keep the plunger. You never know when one of these will come in handy.
01:13:30Linda, I'm taking this car whether you like it or not.
01:13:33Betty, your unorderly actions will result in re-examination.
01:13:36Betty, your unorderly actions will result in re-examination.
01:13:39Betty, your unorderly actions will result in re-examination.
01:13:42Betty, your unorderly actions will result in re-examination.
01:13:45I beg you to reconsider.
01:13:47Sorry, Linda! Can't hear you over the sound of...
01:13:53Final warning! Get out of the car or face re-examination!
01:13:56Oh, sorry, Linda! I interrupted you.
01:13:59What were you saying?
01:14:01Stop right...
01:14:05Re-examinate...
01:14:10Get out of town! Now!
01:14:12Geez, Linda, make up your mind already.
01:14:15I said run, you fool!
01:14:19Okay, okay, I'm leaving.
01:14:21But only because I want to.
01:14:31To be continued...