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00:00Hello everybody, welcome back to the channel, my name's Kevin, I'm a geek, you're watching
00:16Kevin the Geek and welcome back to the final series of Steel Game, we're on series 9, episode
00:242, only 5 more episodes left to go.
00:27I don't know how I feel about this.
00:57Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum
01:03Cats Whiskers.
01:05A little bit better than the drunk spollocks, eh?
01:09Come in, it's open!
01:12Greetings old pal.
01:14Right back at you, old chummarino.
01:17Klansman?
01:18Oh yes, I must have a shape for a pint.
01:21How was Corby?
01:23Oh Corby, aye it was okay.
01:25Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, that, that, right, I haven't really said it to this point, that
01:32is where I live, the town of Corby, which is otherwise known for a lot of people as
01:37Little Scotland, because there was a lot of people from Scotland who came down in, I think
01:42it was like the 70s and that, to work in like the steelworks factories and stuff, so, oh,
01:48that's a nice little thing there, I wasn't expecting that.
01:52Old chummarino.
01:54Klansman?
01:55Oh yes, I must have a shape for a pint.
01:58How was Corby?
02:00Oh Corby, aye it was okay.
02:02That's my cousin planted now.
02:04Very poor turnout at the funeral.
02:06But, by all accounts she was an old boy.
02:08Why haven't we seen the back of Victor by the way?
02:10Sorry.
02:11That's the estate sorted.
02:12She had an estate?
02:13No, she lived in an estate, I was just handing her keys back to her cousin.
02:16I wonder which estate?
02:18Eh, no.
02:23Ah, nice.
02:25So, are we going for a pint or what?
02:27Yep.
02:28Oh my word!
02:30What's up with your face?
02:31Oh, this, nothing.
02:33Just mixing it up a bit.
02:35Oh!
02:36So I got away for a fortnight and I come back and you went into the fried chicken business.
02:41I know this looks good.
02:43You got a beard?
02:45Give me a piece.
02:46I actually quite like it on him.
02:49Victor, a man does not squeeze a beard out for no reason whatsoever.
02:53What is it you're up to?
02:54Take a look at this.
03:00Oh aye.
03:02That's Derek Bedford.
03:03Used to be in Crossroads.
03:04Then he retired.
03:06Then he got to be the cover guy in the Twilight Monthly magazine.
03:09Gets to travel all over the world getting his photographs taken.
03:12Flies everywhere for free.
03:13Goes holidays.
03:14Goes shark fishing.
03:15Eats wherever he likes.
03:16And he looks a million dollars into the bargain.
03:18Wow, Jack.
03:19You know a lot about him.
03:21Aye, I do, aye.
03:23It's not a jealousy thing.
03:25Lucky bastard.
03:27Aye, well his luck's ran out.
03:29He was jet skiing in Barbados.
03:31His steering got locked.
03:32I'm sorry, I'm just obsessed with that beard.
03:36Is he just me or does that make him look really good?
03:39I think he looks like he would look well damn good.
03:42Couldn't have turned it, could he?
03:44They found him 14 miles off the coast.
03:46Did?
03:47Cooked.
03:49He'd look like a pepperami.
03:52Well, that's terrible.
03:53He'd be sorely missed.
03:54Aye, well indeed.
03:55So that's why I've got the beard.
03:57Because you think you can replace Derek Bidford as the Twilight guy?
04:01They're looking at people just now.
04:02There's a form to be filled in.
04:03Photos to be sent.
04:04An interview.
04:06This time they want a couple.
04:08Appeal to the old dames and all.
04:10I want that gig, Jack.
04:12No, no offence, Victor.
04:14I mean, you're a decent looking bloke.
04:15But you're going to need more than a daft beard to swing that gig.
04:21Oh!
04:25Wow!
04:28Is that a shark's tooth?
04:29I believe it is.
04:30Oxfam, £1.99.
04:33Oh!
04:35Wow!
04:40Press the left one.
04:41I just put this away in the cupboard.
04:45It's a 1975 old.
04:56When health freeze is over, you've seen the stock numbers.
04:59Stuff's going missing.
05:00Besides, it's always been two at a time.
05:03It was two at a time for my father and two at a time for his father before him.
05:06You just never enforced it.
05:08Okay, four at a time.
05:10Sorry, father.
05:14One, two, three.
05:16Meena, you only let in three.
05:20That was us left.
05:23You buying anything?
05:25No.
05:26You've been in here before, haven't you?
05:28Maybe.
05:29And as far as I recall, you never bought anything.
05:32Nice recall.
05:34Not as much as a flying saucer.
05:36They're for spacemen.
05:38Have you got a name?
05:40They call me the Lone Wolf.
05:42And why would they call you the Lone Wolf?
05:45Because I work alone.
05:46Mm-hmm.
05:47And I'm going to wolf these.
05:49Howl!
05:54The mean!
05:55How come mean is not stopping him?
05:57Howl!
06:00Bloody howl.
06:03Ah, there you are.
06:05Ah.
06:06The littlest hobo in cat form.
06:13Don't encourage them!
06:15There you go, wee fella, my lad.
06:21Here, you.
06:22This is none of your semi-skimshite.
06:25This is the good, good gear.
06:27All the top.
06:28Turn you into a lovely wee fat cat.
06:31Come on, get it scuttled.
06:41Eh, morning, Joe.
06:43Oh, morning, Winston.
06:50What you doing?
06:51I'm reading the wee cat some scran.
06:53I've got a saucer of milk up the stair for it.
06:56Oh, put it in your tea.
06:57Because he prefers something more substantial.
07:00See that wee stray?
07:02I'm giving it love, attention, sucker.
07:06Well, it looks like you're the sucker.
07:08Because he's clearly moved on fae milk.
07:11Haven't you, Toby's son?
07:14Toby?
07:15His name's Bob.
07:19So the cat's a good fit for me, see?
07:22So I don't have to walk it, because a cat's no a dug.
07:26Cats no a dug.
07:30Thank you for stopping by and clearing it up for us, Mr Ratley.
07:34Tell you something else, a budgie's no a tortoise.
07:38Top.
07:39My point is, the cat's a good fit for Joe as well,
07:42because he needs a companionship.
07:45This is a battle I'm no losing.
07:47What's the wee cat's name?
07:49Well, that's the thing.
07:50You see, he's called it Toby, but I've called it Bob.
07:53Oh, thanks very much, Winston.
07:55You've named the cat after me.
07:57If I named the cat after you, it would be called Bobie.
08:00Bobie the cat, which is a sexual offence.
08:06Oh, look who it is.
08:08Sean Connery and his wee pal.
08:11Odd job.
08:14Well, there's your gold finger for you.
08:16Nice!
08:17Two pounds a brick.
08:18Nice.
08:20LAUGHTER
08:25Right.
08:27Bring it on.
08:28Let's be having it then.
08:30Who's first?
08:32You look like an anorexic Captain Birdseye.
08:35LAUGHTER
08:37You look like a junkie Kenny Rogers.
08:39Yeah.
08:40You look like a Kentucky Fried Wanker.
08:43I've covered chicken, Bobie.
08:45Yeah.
08:46You look like Harold Shipman gone his holidays.
08:49Oh!
08:53So, what's with the beard?
08:55Hey, have you heard of Derek Bedford?
08:57Oh, aye, the sporty pensioner off the front of the magazine.
09:00Aye, well, he's dead.
09:01Mm-hm.
09:02They're coming to Glasgow and they're looking for a new guy.
09:05And he thinks he's the new guy.
09:07Well, I think he'll find I am the new guy.
09:09You're no going to get a go, Jack.
09:11Get a slanky streak of pressure on from down here.
09:14Aye.
09:15He could be standing there with the surfboard
09:17and you could be the beach ball.
09:19LAUGHTER
09:20No, no, it's, er...
09:22Not for me, all that posing in front of magazines and that.
09:25No, that's...
09:26Jimmy, time!
09:27...too vain.
09:28Anyway, you shut up, beach ball.
09:31Oh, good for you, Victor.
09:33What do you have to do?
09:34I could just fill a form out, you know, send your photo in.
09:37They're looking for a woman and all.
09:39Are they?
09:40Oh, I might throw my hat into that.
09:42Oh, it can be you and me, Victor.
09:44Right there on the front cover.
09:48Bobby, do you have an electric razor behind the counter?
09:51My beard's coming off.
09:52No, keep the beard.
09:53I think you look smarter with your beard, Victor.
09:56Oh, my God.
09:57Maybe I could be your beach gal.
09:59Oh!
10:02Make that an open razor, Bobby.
10:03The beard's staying.
10:04The wrists are getting it.
10:06LAUGHTER
10:10What do cats like?
10:12Er, shagging, licking their bits and sleeping.
10:15No, to eat.
10:16You haven't got a cat.
10:17No yet, but I will have soon.
10:19I need something a cat cannae resist.
10:21You want these?
10:22Fish.
10:27Purries, guaranteed to drive a cat to ecstasy.
10:30It's crack for cats.
10:32It's really only dried-out, mashed-up fish guts,
10:35but it dries them after a nut.
10:36How do you know?
10:37Two packs, please.
10:38Get behind the beads.
10:39Huh?
10:40Behind the beads!
10:42LAUGHTER
11:04Ah, you lone wolf.
11:06You appear to have wandered into the lion's den.
11:09There will be no more pilfering.
11:11Hear my roar!
11:13That doesn't sound like a lion.
11:15That sounds more like a big pussy.
11:17Conard.
11:18Oh!
11:19Feeling insults?
11:20Not a wolf, but merely a cub.
11:23Put my gear back.
11:30Oh!
11:32Oh!
11:36I mean, at least he didn't take anything.
11:38Lion be Christ.
11:40Clarence the cross-eyed lion.
11:49Come on, wee bob.
11:51Come and get your fix.
11:54Chicken and liver.
11:56Irresistible.
11:58You're a bastard, Joe.
12:00I want that cat.
12:01That cat wants me.
12:02That cat cannae live with you.
12:04When?
12:05Ryan turning that buggy of yours and they'd be roadkill.
12:07Oh, aye?
12:09And what are you going to do?
12:11Let it use your leg as a scratching post?
12:15Has that cat ever been inside your house?
12:17Not yet.
12:18Has it ever been inside yours?
12:20No.
12:21So here's what I'm proposing.
12:23The first person to get wee bob, Toby...
12:26Bob, Toby, Toby, Bob, shut up!
12:29Whoever's hoose that cat chooses to enter is the victor.
12:34And the loser fits a cat flap for the winner.
12:37You hear that, Toby?
12:39We're getting a cat flap.
12:46Oh, ho, look who it is.
12:48Our man in Havana.
12:50Well, I'm Havana lager.
12:54One pint, please.
12:58Still gunning for that magazine job, eh?
13:00Correct.
13:01Offence, Victor, but you look like Jeremy Corbyn's idiot cousin.
13:05Oh!
13:08Offence, like.
13:09All taken.
13:10Yeah.
13:11Where's Jackie, boy?
13:13He's away at the tune. He'll be here directly.
13:15Oh, please, Sammy, he's my bearer as well.
13:29Oh, Victor.
13:31You couldn't see green cheese, Isaac, could you?
13:33What do you mean?
13:34Don't start.
13:36You're done up like a fish supper.
13:38Well, it's the hand, isn't it?
13:40They're looking for a woman as well,
13:42and I'm not the only man making an effort.
13:48Yeah?
13:51Oh, my leg!
13:55What job are you applying for?
13:57Coco the bastard and clown!
14:00I'll see you on the beach.
14:04Ooh!
14:05Well, this is just dandy, isn't it, eh?
14:07You try to do something,
14:09get the pish ripped at you for it,
14:11and then everybody jumps on a bandwagon.
14:14Well, you know where your friends are, eh?
14:20Oh, he's a snorball.
14:22I was really hoping he'd go for the beard as well.
14:27Come here, Victor.
14:28Technology, eh?
14:31Let me tell him, he's shook.
14:32No, it's all right.
14:35What is it?
14:36Hang on, hang on.
14:39Is he...?
14:41Has he tied his hair?
14:43It looks a bit darker,
14:45out of the side of his hat.
14:48You don't take your bun off?
14:50No.
14:52I think he has.
14:53Take your bun off.
14:54Yeah, take it off.
14:55No, I'm feeling a bit cold.
14:56No, take it off, take it off.
14:57Jack.
14:58Jack.
15:03Take your bun off, big Jack.
15:08Oh!
15:10Looks pretty good.
15:11Big deal.
15:12So, I got my hair done this morning.
15:14How did you spend your afternoon?
15:16Getting stretched on a rack?
15:18Excuse me?
15:19What height are you?
15:20Bloody stupid question.
15:21The same height I've always been.
15:22You've always been six foot one?
15:24Aye.
15:25Whoa!
15:26I've always been the same height.
15:27Oh, he's got lifts in his shoes or something.
15:29That's why we've always been pals.
15:31God, we're icy, aren't we?
15:33Nice trousers, Jack.
15:40You've got lifts in your shoes, Jack.
15:42Yeah.
15:44Yes, Victor, I'm sorry.
15:46Listen, cards on the table.
15:47I need a shot at this goodness.
15:49And I sincerely hope it's not going to affect our friendship,
15:51you know what I mean?
15:52It will not.
15:54May the best man win.
15:56Aye, well, glad to hear that.
15:58Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going for a piss.
16:08He shouldn't be...
16:09He shouldn't be wobbling too much.
16:11Cos, I mean, it's fairly consistent across the whole shoe
16:15that they're...
16:17It's not like he's in high heels or something.
16:25There we go.
16:27Wolf.
16:28Navid.
16:30The brass balls of you.
16:32To walk in here so brazen when you know that I'm watching you.
16:36The wolf needs to eat.
16:38And you don't think I'll catch you?
16:40No, with that big fat belly.
16:42Oh!
16:44Feardoos, I stand in defeat.
16:47Peel your boots.
16:49One you ploys this.
16:51One you ploys this.
16:53I know when I'm beaten.
17:01Chocolate bar.
17:07Pack of crisps.
17:12Ten of kidney beans for the dinner.
17:14I love kidney beans.
17:16Just kidney beans?
17:19And to wash it all down...
17:25A ball of fizzle.
17:31Who's it going to be?
17:34Oh!
17:35£4.80, you little bastard.
17:39No! Mina, stop him!
17:42Hello, Navid!
17:45Oh.
17:48How did you not see that?
17:51Like...
17:52Come on, Navid, you're better than that.
18:02Like, did he not think?
18:04Like, he's only beads.
18:06He's surely going to run through there,
18:08especially if you're standing behind the counter.
18:11Bob!
18:13Where are you?
18:14Oh!
18:15Good choice.
18:17Hello, Bob.
18:19Hmm?
18:20What's this, you ask?
18:22It's a dead roast chicken.
18:25Still warm.
18:27Would you like a wee bit?
18:30Of course you would.
18:33Is that you hooked now?
18:36Well, the first bit was for free,
18:39but if you want another piece of heaven,
18:41you're going to have to work for it.
18:44Walk this way.
18:49Walk this way.
18:51Talk this way.
18:56Walk this way.
18:58Talk this way.
19:03Hey, Joe.
19:05It's Winston.
19:07I hope you've got a saw in the house,
19:09cos you are going to be cutting me a cat flap.
19:12Oh, you don't believe me.
19:14I'll take a wee photo.
19:21Oh!
19:23Ah!
19:25Oh!
19:27Yes, Jack?
19:28Please turn the heating off.
19:30Take your cardigan off.
19:31No, it's not that.
19:32It's just far too warm in here.
19:36Oh!
19:38Your hair is running down your face, Jack.
19:40Such a beardy buzz.
19:43Right, have you looked through the questionnaire?
19:45Aye.
19:46Good.
19:47OK.
19:48Let's start at the top.
19:50What have you put for outdoor activities?
19:52Well, I'm taking yes,
19:53cos there was that day last summer when it didnae rain,
19:56and Bobby did the barbecue in the car park.
19:58You and I had a rotten burger.
20:00That's yes.
20:01Water sports.
20:02You mind we were pished and we were choking for a slash?
20:05That's plenty, Jack.
20:07Hold on, but...
20:08I was on the Waverley for Billy Cassidy's stag,
20:11so I'm putting sailing.
20:12Right.
20:13And you did go on the boat for your birthday.
20:14I'm putting sailing as well,
20:15because I remember being on a pedalo with my Jean in Santa Ponza.
20:18And the reason I remember
20:19is because I burnt my forehead, my shoulders and my belly.
20:22It was absolutely brutal.
20:24Do you ride a horse?
20:26Yes.
20:27Since when?
20:28Blackpool.
20:29That was a donkey,
20:30and you fell off it because you were pished.
20:32Donkeys, zebras, it's all one.
20:36Here, Jack, do you want to just save time by taking everything?
20:45You putting your footie in?
20:47Aye.
20:48Got it done at Jerome's.
20:49Well, it's swifty print now.
20:51Aye.
20:52Who done yours?
20:53Shug gave us a dig out.
20:54I'll give us a look at it then.
20:56You first.
20:57We'll both go at the same time.
20:59Come on.
21:00Promise not to laugh.
21:02No.
21:04I want to laugh.
21:10When did you get that into you?
21:12Yesterday.
21:13That's a boxing pose.
21:15It's correct.
21:16But that's a wrestling belt.
21:21Oh, no.
21:22See, I bought that for the Grand Wain's Christmas present.
21:25I put it in the cupboard and forgot to send it.
21:27Think anybody will notice?
21:29No.
21:30It'll be fine.
21:31Put it in.
21:33Oh, no.
21:34Sure's yours.
21:35All right.
21:37No, it's still a game.
21:39After all this, it's going to be like Tam or someone who ends up getting this
21:44without even really trying.
21:46Think anybody will notice?
21:47No.
21:48It'll be fine.
21:49Put it in.
21:51Oh, no.
21:52Sure's yours.
21:53All right.
21:56Ha-ha-ha-ha!
21:58Well, hello there, James May.
22:00Oh, I like the way you're staring into the middle distance.
22:02Where'll I go today, my red E-type jagger?
22:04We'll go to the bookies, we'll go to the butchers, we'll go to the Klansmen.
22:09Whose car is that?
22:10That's Big Bastard's.
22:12Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
22:14Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
22:16Oh!
22:17Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
22:26You've howled your last howl, Wolf.
22:28In a minute, it is me who'll be howling.
22:31With laughter and that.
22:46Can I help you?
22:47I'm looking for a child called Lone Wolf.
22:50Dad!
22:56No.
22:57I'm begging you, Bob's son.
22:59Don't go in.
23:00Come on, wee Toby.
23:04Come here, son.
23:07Don't do it, Bob.
23:08He's a ratbag.
23:11Hey!
23:12Zombie!
23:19I'm at my wits' end with this one.
23:21I don't know where he is half the time, and I don't know what he's up to.
23:25Where is the husband?
23:26He's away a lot of the time.
23:28On business.
23:29He's a diamond merchant, you see.
23:30Really?
23:31Aye, that's why we're living like the Kardashians.
23:34Don't know he's pissed off.
23:36With the diamonds?
23:39Oh, I see.
23:40The diamonds are part of the Kardashian sarcasm.
23:43You need to pay back every penny you stole from Mr. Harid.
23:46How am I going to do that?
23:48I've nae money.
23:52What age are you, Darren?
23:54Thirteen last week.
23:55Well, it'll appear that thirteen is your lucky number.
24:00Paper rounds?
24:02How have you done that, you sleeket bastard?
24:05Fresh fish caught in the ocean this morning.
24:11Tuna?
24:13Cat flap, please.
24:15Sorry.
24:23I'm next.
24:25Is that Sam Behlens?
24:27You all right?
24:28I was, aye, but now I feel a wee bit jumpy.
24:33Listen, all we want out of this is for one of the two of us to win it.
24:36You've got every chance in the world.
24:40Thanks, Jack.
24:41So do you.
24:43Just go in there and be the best version of yourself.
24:49I love the beaches.
24:51The sand.
24:52The surf.
24:55The seashells.
24:58I also like barbecues.
25:01It'd be me be so kind of me.
25:03Chips.
25:05Ribs.
25:06And, um...
25:08And sausages.
25:11Has anyone told you you sound a bit like Sean Connery?
25:16It has been shared.
25:19Thanks for coming in.
25:22Shanks.
25:27First three weeks, no wages.
25:29Until I'm paid back.
25:30After that, you make good money.
25:32Thanks, Mr. Harreed.
25:34I really do appreciate the opportunity.
25:36I won't let you down.
25:37Good luck.
25:38You better not.
25:41Hi.
25:46So, it's Isa.
25:47Oui.
25:48Isa.
25:49Little Isa.
25:50My name is Isa.
25:52Training.
25:53She's got balloons in there.
25:54I see you didn't put your age.
25:56No.
25:57A lady never discusses her age.
26:06You see, Mr. Melton...
26:08Oh, God, I'm so sorry.
26:10The sound effects for that.
26:12Oh, my word.
26:13Discusses her age.
26:21You see, Mr. Melton,
26:22the couple we are looking for
26:24have to have that outdoor glow,
26:27that sea-sprayed sparkle,
26:30a face that says,
26:31I've had a life and I'm still living it.
26:35Have you had any work done?
26:40I am aghast, shocked and horrified
26:43that you would even suggest it.
26:45What the hell?
26:47What the hell, Sam?
26:49Thanks very much, Mr. Jarvis.
26:51It was a pleasure meeting you.
26:53Oh, is that it?
26:54Oh, well, if you'll allow me for a second.
26:56The ladies love this, by the way.
27:05Oh, I do like to be beside the seaside.
27:09Oh, I do like to be beside the sea.
27:12That's fine.
27:13Thank you, Mr. Jarvis.
27:14I've got a minute.
27:15There's a bit of it coming.
27:16Oh, I can't stand all the videos.
27:18Oh, yay.
27:20That's enough of that.
27:21Yes, enough.
27:23Oh, dear.
27:24Just a night like cleaning the windows.
27:27Di-di-di-di-di.
27:29Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.
27:32Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.
27:38Ha!
27:39No way, man.
27:40The wolf's got a job.
27:41All these papers are heavy and my legs are killing me.
27:44See you later, mate.
27:50Good job, Winson.
27:52Ah, you're welcome, Joe.
27:54A bet's a bet.
28:02Oh, no.
28:03Better not put them all in there.
28:09No!
28:15Oh, no!
28:17Wolf!
28:21Joe!
28:27I thought you suited up, beard.
28:31I planted it half, you know.
28:33I see you're back to five foot two.
28:35Five foot eight, you cheeky big...
28:37What about Sam?
28:39Hmm.
28:40Me dye my hair Paul McCartney brown as well.
28:43And it'll no be long till you're back to nine.
28:47It's better than a 42, wouldn't it,
28:49except I must pass the five-fold price.
28:56Say hello to Mr...
28:59Twilight.
29:00Oh, who is it?
29:04Oh, Shug!
29:06Wow!
29:07Welcome, Shug.
29:08Well deserved, Shug.
29:09What can I tell you?
29:11My years in the Navy, my specialised skill set.
29:15I am an outdoor man.
29:16What about the wig?
29:17Oh, they never even noticed it.
29:19Really?
29:20Mr Twilight Shug.
29:21Mr Twilight.
29:23Mrs Twilight.
29:25Not Peggy.
29:27Whoa!
29:33Wow, Edith.
29:35You look humid, humid.
29:40You did wee hairy moles.
29:42They took them off.
29:43There's a wee keepsake.
29:45Oh.
29:46Oh!
29:48Oh!
29:50And your hump?
29:51Turns out it was nae curvature of the spine.
29:53It was just fluid.
29:56Oh!
29:58Oh!
30:01What can I get the glamorous girl?
30:03Pina Colada?
30:04Cuban...
30:05There it is!
30:06Pina Guinness.
30:07There we go!
30:08Oh!
30:09Oh!
30:10Oh!
30:11Oh!
30:12Oh!
30:13Oh!
30:14Oh!
30:15Oh!
30:16Oh!
30:17Oh!
30:18Oh!
30:19Oh!
30:20Oh!
30:21Oh!
30:22Oh!
30:23Oh!
30:25Oh!
30:26Oh!
30:27I've just had my dinner in a minute.
30:29Oh, I don't know if I can stomach it now.
30:31Oh!
30:33Oh!
30:35Oh!
30:37Look who it is, Joe.
30:39A wolf in sheepish clothing.
30:42I'm sorry, Joe.
30:43My feet were sore and I just wanted a shot.
30:46Nae harm done, son.
30:48I'll say no more about it.
30:50You're lucky, son.
30:52Another chance.
30:53You were at a fork in the road.
30:55Down one path, a life of petty crime and infamy.
30:59The other road?
31:00Hard work.
31:01Reward.
31:02Respect.
31:14You little prick!
31:17Oh!
31:19God!
31:24Well, that basically means we've only got four episodes to go.
31:36Four episodes to go.
31:39And, of course, next week is the first episode of a two-parter.
31:47I've been debating how I'm going to do it.
31:51And I think I need to stretch out Still Game as long as I can.
31:57I have to.
31:59I'm trying to delay the inevitable of that final episode
32:04because that is going to be tough to watch.
32:08It's going to be really tough to watch.
32:10So, what I will be doing for that two-parter episode...
32:19Basically, what I'm going to do...
32:21So, next Sunday, I will release part one.
32:24That will be at...
32:26Well, I always do it...
32:28Because, obviously, Series 7, 8 and 9 are blocked for YouTube.
32:32Well, they're partially blocked.
32:34So, basically, if you're UK and Ireland, you can't see it.
32:39Elsewhere in the world, you can.
32:41So, I always do it.
32:42Nine o'clock on the Sunday, I'll make it available for everyone who's not UK.
32:48And then at 10 o'clock is when I do the link to the Daily Motion for people in the UK.
32:56So, what I'm going to do...
32:59I'm going to release the first part as normal.
33:03At the exact same time, so, basically, 10 o'clock on the...
33:09Well, yeah.
33:11So, obviously, on Patreon, I will be releasing the day earlier.
33:16I'll be releasing the first part, so you get to see that a day earlier anyway.
33:2010 o'clock on the Sunday, I will release part two.
33:25So, the moment you have watched part one of...
33:29It's an episode called Dead Leg.
33:31Straight away, if you're a member of the Patreon, you will be able to see part two straight away on the Patreon.
33:39Otherwise, you will have to wait for the following Sunday for part two.
33:43That's how I'm doing it.
33:45So, if you want to do that, then join the Patreon.
33:48And, of course, you can see not only still game early, but you can see all of my content early.
33:55Including some stuff which is quite a bit earlier.
33:58Of course, you know, like the Inbetweeners.
34:01I release all of series two before I'd even aired the first episode of the second series for YouTube.
34:10I'm going to be doing the same when it comes to Outnumbered.
34:14We're not going to do series two for that.
34:15I've currently recorded two episodes of that.
34:17I need to do the other four.
34:19And the plan also is to do basically the same for One Foot in the Grave.
34:25Which will only...
34:27I don't even think...
34:29I think I'll just about be able to do it without...
34:31I can end series one by the time we get to Christmas.
34:35But series two, which I need to watch before I see two Christmas specials, they won't be until next year.
34:41So, you will see them again much, much earlier for that.
34:46So, yeah. There's loads of stuff on Patreon.
34:48Of course, if you go for the Boffins here or higher, then of course you can get the access to my full movie reactions.
34:56Which, of course, I've got quite a few for Halloween.
35:01I've got some stuff.
35:03I'll be, of course, doing some for Christmas.
35:05So, yeah. There's loads of stuff there.
35:07And, of course, at the moment, at the time we're recording, I have the Supergeek tier level.
35:13Which is where you get yourself a guaranteed reaction once per month.
35:19And I started that originally just making that available for one single person.
35:24I have expanded it. It's now available for two people per month.
35:28So, if you want to be the second Supergeek of the month, you can, of course, go to Patreon and see it there.
35:34But that episode was great.
35:37Absolutely fantastic.
35:41That was absolutely fantastic.
35:47I loved the whole storyline with the new cover star thing.
35:53Was that a real celebrity?
35:55Was that a real thing?
35:58I loved the cat thing between Joe and Winston. That was great.
36:01But, oh my god, Naveed!
36:04He's always been so smart, so clever.
36:07And he really annoyed me that he kept getting bested by this little kid.
36:11I mean, honestly, of all the people, you would like to think he's going to employ Tam to help him out.
36:18Tam would not give him any nonsense.
36:20He should have had bloody Mina.
36:23How Mina didn't stop the wolf when he's trying to run out through the front door?
36:28Okay, fair enough.
36:30When he comes in the second time, she's on the toilet.
36:33But he didn't think to padlock or whatever the back door?
36:39Come on, Naveed, you're better than that!
36:42But, great episode.
36:44Absolutely fantastic episode.
36:46Absolutely loved it.
36:47And so we've only got, I believe, one more episode to go.
36:52To go for the month of September.
36:55So, tomorrow it is, of course, the second episode of Series 9 of Benidorm.
37:00So you can check that out.
37:02But what I will also be doing tomorrow is I'm going to be doing my monthly plan video.
37:08So, of course, I will talk about what is going to be happening for the month of October.
37:12On the 1st of October is going to be something brand new to YouTube.
37:17Something I've not done before.
37:18But it has been available for Patreon for a little while.
37:21Again, it is something that is a guaranteed choice from one of my Patreons.
37:25So, I'm looking forward to showing that.
37:28It's going to be interesting what you guys think.
37:30I absolutely loved it.
37:31There's actually two episodes of it that I'm releasing, both on the 1st.
37:35But, yeah, we've got, if all goes to plan, four movies that will be available in October.
37:42Obviously, in honour of Halloween.
37:44You may already know about them if you've seen other videos.
37:46So, yeah, stay tuned for all of that.
37:49That is going to do it for today.
37:51Thank you very much for joining me.
37:52Only four episodes left to go for Steel Game.
37:55For now, my name's Kevin.
37:57I'm a geek.
37:58You've been watching Kevin the Geek.
38:00Goodbye.