Kevin the Geek
  • 3 months ago

Category

😹
Fun
Transcript
00:00Well, ladies and gentlemen, we now need to start the final series of Steel Game.
00:09Oh, boy.
00:22Hello, everybody. Welcome back to the channel. My name's Kevin, I'm your geek.
00:25You're watching Kevin the Geek.
00:26And welcome, yeah, like I said, to the final series of Steel Game.
00:33I've been on one hell of a journey, an amazing journey, since doing the very first episode of Steel Game.
00:44All the way back, I want to say it was, I can tell you exactly, the 4th of June of 2023.
00:544th of June 2023. And by the end of October 2024, that will be me complete with that journey of Steel Game.
01:08It's been a rollercoaster of emotions, hasn't it, over many different episodes, many different star guests and everything.
01:16But, yeah, it's been a good time.
01:19Obviously, that first episode, at the time of me recording this, I am currently on 8,457 viewers.
01:27Which, of course, makes it my highest viewed episode of anything that I've done ever on the channel.
01:34So, a massive thank you to everybody who's ever watched that video.
01:38Of course, the first three episodes, I do remember being, a lot of the comments were all of the same kind of thing.
01:45Oh, the audio quality is a bit rubbish, it's too quiet, you're too loud.
01:49But, I was doing everything on my phone at that point.
01:52So, I'd like to think that the improvement of the quality of the channel and the videos and everything has just improved dramatically.
02:03And it's thanks to you guys for joining with me, supporting me and encouraging me to get better and to produce better quality stuff at the end of the day.
02:13So, much love to each and every single one of you.
02:16But we are now doing the first episode of Series 9, which is apparently called Local Hero.
02:23And, of course, there's a two-part episode in this series.
02:31I've not decided yet how I'm going to do that.
02:34I will make up my mind in due course.
02:37But, let's begin the final series of Steel Game.
02:45I am going to play the intro for every one of these episodes for that final time.
02:50Let's round it off with a bang.
03:07Zip-a-dee-doo-dah, zip-a-dee-day.
03:11My, oh, my, oh, get out of the way.
03:18Behold, Winston Ingram.
03:21Craig Lang's very own ninja.
03:23Hello, my friend.
03:24Hello, my friend.
03:25Hello, my friend.
03:26Hello, my friend.
03:27Hello, my friend.
03:28Hello, my friend.
03:29Hello, my friend.
03:30Hello, my friend.
03:31Hello, my friend.
03:32Hello, my friend.
03:33Hello, my friend.
03:34Hello, my friend.
03:35Hello, my friend.
03:36Hello.
03:37Hello, Winston.
03:38There is you without even looking.
03:40All spice, stale beer and stinking socks.
03:44Ha!
03:45All that.
03:46Bun.
03:47Oh, you've been busted, you!
03:48Oh, shit!
03:49My bag!
03:50My bag!
03:51Winston, help!
03:52Where's his bag?
03:53Where's his bag?
03:54Get him!
03:55You one-legged, pot-bellied, lazy ass!
03:58What are you going to do?
04:00Kiss me?
04:07Oh, my word!
04:12Boof!
04:13Shut it, Tadger!
04:14Ah!
04:15Here you go.
04:17Any time.
04:18Oh!
04:23Winston always knows how to save the day, doesn't he?
04:30Oh!
04:31Where the hell have you been?
04:33What do you mean, where the hell have I been?
04:35The bookie's putting on a line.
04:36I always go to the bookie's on a Wednesday.
04:38Aye, aye.
04:39Except it's Thursday.
04:40Oh!
04:41I'm going to buy two beefy-bakes to Thursday out of Henderson's
04:43and tan them before we get to the Klansmen.
04:45So as not to annoy Bobby.
04:47Because his pies are pish.
04:48Correct.
04:49We know that.
04:50So?
04:51What?
04:52Where's my beefy-bake?
04:53Ach, I've hit them, Jack.
04:54You weren't at the designated meat point.
04:56Well, all I know is you've designated my beefy-bake
04:58doing your neck, you skinny, fat rat, you.
05:01That's chaos.
05:02We're going to have to communicate better.
05:04Well, how about we communicate like this?
05:06Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.
05:08You know what that is?
05:09That's Morse code for greedy arsehole.
05:18It's Edith, yeah.
05:20I know that growl.
05:22He's staring at it.
05:23Raw man.
05:25All man.
05:27You're just what Craig Lang needs.
05:30Oh, you've got me all going.
05:33We don't want them two again.
05:35Give me some space.
05:37I've got space for you.
05:54Ach, no, Iser.
05:56You've bought me plenty.
05:58Ach, go on.
06:01Just one more time.
06:02Yeah, don't turn out a free pint.
06:04You don't have the money.
06:05Oh, I've got the money, all right.
06:07Right here in this purse.
06:09Thanks to you, you're a hero.
06:11Like Batman.
06:13Batman?
06:14Oh, that's right.
06:15I'm Robin.
06:20Oh, look who it is.
06:22Thelma and Louise.
06:24Ah, well, we'd be happy to drive off the end of your cliff
06:27to get away from your patter.
06:28Thanks, prick.
06:30There you are.
06:31Listen, there's a bunch of wains outside asking for you.
06:33What for?
06:34Well, they just say,
06:35could you please send out Mr Ingram?
06:38What did you say?
06:39I said, away here and get to your bed.
06:40You've got school in the morning, you wee fannies.
06:43Oddly, that didn't work.
06:44So they're still there.
06:46Hooray!
06:47Can we get a selfie?
06:49What?
06:50What do you want?
06:51Me to take a photo of you?
06:52No, you be us, you silly old duffer.
06:54Hooray!
06:56What do you want a photo of me for?
06:58Are you at the wind-up?
06:59No, we've seen what you've done to that bag snatcher.
07:02Took your leg off and knocked that guy out.
07:05Actual legends.
07:07A legend?
07:08I filmed you fair there.
07:09Look.
07:11Oh, what's this, boys?
07:13Oh, that boy snatched my bag.
07:15He was running away.
07:17And there's Vincent taking his leg off.
07:19What about that message with the running commentary?
07:21That video speaks for itself.
07:23Yeah.
07:25Oh, eh?
07:26What about that?
07:27Bullseye!
07:28Shut it, Tadger!
07:30That is brilliant, Vincent.
07:32You're like Dirty Harry.
07:33I'm more like Mankey Winston.
07:36So?
07:37So what?
07:38Can we get a selfie?
07:40Aye, I suppose so.
07:42Right, are you wanting us in it, then?
07:44No, he hasn't named his.
07:46He'll be dead soon.
07:47Oh, that's true.
07:48Here we go.
07:49Go on.
07:50Shut it, Tadger.
07:54Stay with me, Des Clark, as we are joined next
07:56by Scotland's latest internet sensation.
07:59Des?
08:00Oh!
08:01Aye, Winston, I'm Des.
08:02Hello, son.
08:03OK.
08:04Great story, by the way.
08:05Eh? Och aye, well, it's a simple enough story, you know.
08:07Oh, hold on.
08:08Save it.
08:09Have a seat.
08:10Now, when we come out of this track,
08:12we're going to go live, and I'll ask you about it then.
08:14You've got about 20 seconds.
08:16Oh, and no swearing.
08:17So now's the time to get anything out of your system.
08:19Can I get you a cup of tea or coffee, Mr Ingram?
08:21Eh, tea.
08:22Tea.
08:23Tea, you bastard.
08:24Well, a big shitey spoon of sugar in it.
08:29He said get it out of him.
08:31Ros Fanny arsehole.
08:36We are back, and blessed indeed to have
08:39a phenomenal internet superstar in our company.
08:42As of this morning, the clip of Mr Winston Ingram
08:45taking down a bag snatcher last week
08:47has been watched by over 300,000 people.
08:50So, how does it feel, Winston, to go viral?
08:53Eh?
08:54I'm no viral.
08:55I have a shower every morning.
08:59Tough studio.
09:00Tell us what happened.
09:02Eh?
09:03It's quite simple, really.
09:04I seen this bastard fella running away with my pal's handbag.
09:10I didn't really think twice about it.
09:12I just took him out with my leg.
09:14You've seen it.
09:15Indeed we have, and Scotland thanks you.
09:17You, Winston, are a national hero.
09:19Now, would you like to stick around
09:21and take part in our pumping pickle quiz?
09:23What?
09:24Shut it, Tadger!
09:26And Scotland does indeed love you.
09:28Look, the phones are lighting up here, Winston.
09:30Let's go to the lines and speak to Grant on line one.
09:33Morning, Grant.
09:34Hello, Grant.
09:35So his friends are the famous now, aren't they?
09:37Aye.
09:38He'll be rubbing shoulders with the Kardashians
09:40and a man that turned into a woman.
09:42Say hello to my friends, Brad and George.
09:45Thornby?
09:46Clooney.
09:47Aye.
09:48The phone is king, no?
09:49How do you mean?
09:50Well, everyone's got one.
09:51Me, Isa, Winston, Tam, Bobby.
09:54Even Mina's got one.
09:56She will use it to order Chinese takeaway.
09:58I'm not a pig, I'm a pig.
10:02She likes thrones.
10:05Aye, well, I guess that makes us a couple of yesterdays men, doesn't it?
10:09Aye, well, it's enough for us, that, eh?
10:11I'm quite happy being a yesterdays man.
10:13Yeah, well, I'm not.
10:14Neither am I.
10:15Oh, you can stick that right up your cardigan.
10:17Look at us the other day, right?
10:18I'm in the bookies, you're in the bakers.
10:20Now, if we had a couple of phones, we would not have got in that fancle.
10:24Hello there, Jack. I'm in the bakers.
10:26Oh, hello, Victor. I'm in the bookies.
10:28Should you not be here?
10:29Yes, I should. You stay where you are because I'm on my way.
10:31Do not eat my beefy bake.
10:34Sorry, Jack, you're breaking up.
10:39Two phones.
10:40Two phones?
10:42You want an Android or iPhone? 3G or 4G Wi-Fi?
10:45I've got 16, 32, 64 terabytes.
10:47I can also do you 128, but you're only going to need that if you're storing, like, a lot of music and videos and stuff.
10:52Are you going to use them for streaming?
10:55Yeah.
10:56Oh, oh, oh, oh.
11:01You just want to talk to each other.
11:02Aye, son.
11:04Hold on.
11:06Keep it simple.
11:07You two red pays you goes.
11:09Which ones?
11:10I cannae one. They're two daft old bastards.
11:13Oops.
11:15Still might walk out.
11:17There you are.
11:18Two peas, he go forwards.
11:2020 quid each.
11:24And they still look a little bit sophisticated.
11:26Victor, pure Jetsons.
11:33Does anyone still actually do top-ups with phones these days?
11:35I didn't even know if a pays you goes was even still a thing.
11:39I was getting ready to say for a little while I wanted to allow the scene to play out there.
11:47I get them wanting to have phones and everything.
11:50It makes sense for them to be able to communicate when they need to.
11:53But if that is such a long-standing tradition, like, every Thursday you go down, you get a beefy bed, then you go to Clansman.
12:01How have they forgot?
12:03Other than them going, oh, yeah, I got it wrong because it's the wrong day.
12:08I mean, their lives are pretty repetitive.
12:11Hot dog, son.
12:14What are you laughing at?
12:15It's you. You crack me up.
12:17What, for asking for a hot dog?
12:20Tell me what is funny about these three words. Hot. Dog. Son.
12:24See what I mean?
12:25You wanting ketchup?
12:26Aye.
12:28Mustard?
12:29Aye.
12:31You want onions?
12:32Is this your first day? Of course I want onions.
12:34Is this your first day? Of course I want onions.
12:37Please, give us the life.
12:41Shut it, Taja.
12:46Thanking you very much.
12:47For you, nothing.
12:48Eh?
12:49You're a star, man. A legend. A leg-end.
12:54Yes, leg-end!
12:55Serious. You're the man of the hour.
12:59Enjoying the spoils of contemporary fame that only the internet could bring.
13:03Eh?
13:04A complete stranger bestows a gift upon you in exchange for the privilege of basking in your glow for the briefest of moments.
13:12You on about?
13:13Observe.
13:14Mate, can I trouble you for a gratis hot dog sandwich?
13:19Absolutely not, junkie.
13:20Ha!
13:23There it is.
13:24I thought you weren't on the methadone.
13:26Why?
13:27Of mothers and girls.
13:28That's what you mean, son.
13:29Aye.
13:31Cheers.
13:34What's your next move?
13:36A young boy works at Henderson's, the bakers.
13:38Phone's on his phone.
13:39I think I've got a sorted role out of him.
13:41Winston, if there's anything I know about digital fame, it's fleeting.
13:45Do you think Elvis played hayrides and lowdowns all his days?
13:49No.
13:50Mr Tom Parker took him to Vegas.
13:53And if you're enjoying this amount of fame,
13:56and that mustard on your cardigan tells me that you are,
14:00then you need to grow it.
14:02Not chill it.
14:03Keep it fresh.
14:07Well, how would I do that?
14:09Follow me.
14:11Mick is such a weird character, isn't he?
14:14He's such an odds with it.
14:17You know, he's supposed to be, like, down in luck.
14:20He's a junkie.
14:21He's been on the methadone and everything.
14:23He's trying to get...
14:24And yet he can be so articulate and yet so dumb all at the same time.
14:28He's such a weird one.
14:33You bastard.
14:37Jack Jarvis, Esquire.
14:39To whom am I speaking?
14:41It's your old pal Victor Medea calling you from my mobile device.
14:44Oh, smashing.
14:46Are you in?
14:47Yes, I am.
14:48And the door is on the latch.
14:50So enter at your leisure.
14:52Entering the apartment now, over.
14:54You know, pay as you go, he's going to be really bad for these two.
14:57I reckon they're going to have a very high phone bill.
15:03Oh, I thoroughly enjoyed that.
15:06Aye, these are great, aren't they?
15:08But listen, I'm no keen on my phone when it rings.
15:11Oh, you mean your ringtone.
15:13Aye, I don't like it.
15:15It sounds like the Titanic just before it sank.
15:18You can change that.
15:19Can you?
15:20What have you got?
15:22Call me.
15:24Call me.
15:28Yeah, I've done this.
15:32I like that.
15:33Aye, aye, it's a good fit for me, you know.
15:36Suggests a man of action, mystery, intrigue.
15:39Well, I'll have that as well, then.
15:41Aye.
15:42No.
15:43No.
15:44We kind of have the same ringtone, Jack.
15:46That's shite.
15:47The ringtone's an individual thing.
15:48It should say something unique about you.
15:51Well, I want mines to uniquely say,
15:54Hello, ladies, I'm a widower.
15:56And therefore available for dinner.
15:59Or perhaps a little more.
16:02The perfect ringtone for that is, Jack.
16:04What?
16:06Oh, you bastard!
16:08Have you done?
16:10I think my unique ringtone,
16:13when I was...
16:15We're probably talking about 13 years ago.
16:18It was sort of 2010, 2011 era.
16:21And I can guarantee that I was probably one of the very few,
16:25if not only persons, who ever had this as a ringtone.
16:29But there's a TV show that I watched as a kid,
16:32and I never remember anything about it,
16:34other than the theme tune.
16:36And in my opinion, it is one of the best theme tunes ever.
16:49Bonus points if you manage to get that.
16:51Put it in the comments below.
16:53You need to come and see this.
16:56Oh, look, it's Winston.
16:59Hello, Winston!
17:01For God's sake, Jack, it's not a phone link.
17:04It's an uploaded video.
17:06It's an uploaded video, you dafty.
17:08Yeah, dafty.
17:10What are you doing, Winston?
17:12The Winston combo roll.
17:14The breakfast of champions.
17:16That looks bogging.
17:18You live under a bridge. That's bogging.
17:20Anyway, shut up and get in.
17:22It's me they're tuning in to see.
17:25Now, a lot of people have been contacting me,
17:27tweeting me and face-chatting me...
17:29Face-chatting?
17:31..to see how I keep my strength up.
17:33And here it is. Come in, you eejit. Come in.
17:35There's too much oil in there.
17:38What would you know about cooking?
17:40But I'll be cooking with a spoon.
17:43Right, back to the pan.
17:45Now, here we go.
17:47You take your flat sausage and you stick it there.
17:49Always flat, mind, because if you use links,
17:51they roll after roll.
17:53So you put your flat sausage on the tatty scone bed.
17:56And then finally,
17:58you top it with a fried egg,
18:00a wee bit of white pepper
18:02and the secret ingredient,
18:04Tabasco.
18:06That looks absolutely delicious.
18:09Right, here we go.
18:15Shut it, you. Give me a towel.
18:19And that's how TikTok started.
18:21Just Winston doing what he normally does.
18:23I mean, who's interested in watching that?
18:25Who's interested? Everybody.
18:29You look at that up this morning.
18:31That'll go up to a million now.
18:33Whoa, that's had more views than I've ever had.
18:35Click that.
18:37There you go.
18:39Oh, dear.
18:41Oh, my God. Did that hurt my computer?
18:43You were the police at my door.
18:47Click it. Click it.
18:49I can still see it.
18:51Who did you click?
18:53Like.
18:57You diddy-biddies. A million views.
18:59For bursting an egg.
19:01A million and a half and rising.
19:03That's your problem with the modern world.
19:05You can get famous for doing nothing.
19:07See, in the old days, you had to have talent.
19:09You had to do everything.
19:11Your facades, your basses,
19:13your piscualies.
19:15You just heard the daft voice.
19:17I can smell the rinsing, Scott.
19:19I'm going to stick up for Joe Pasquale here.
19:21Like, my mum,
19:23it loves Joe Pasquale.
19:25I've seen him a couple of times on stage.
19:27I find him funny.
19:29But maybe that's just my weird
19:31rubbish sense of humour.
19:33Who knows? I don't know.
19:35I like him.
19:37We want some of that,
19:39and we're going to do it better.
19:41What you two daft old buggers
19:43all day with phones.
19:45Call each other a hearse.
19:47How many contacts do you have?
19:49Three.
19:51Let me see now. Four.
19:53Code.
19:55Contacts, contacts, contacts.
19:57One.
19:59Jack.
20:01Let me guess.
20:03Jack? Aye.
20:05And would your secret passcode be
20:07one, two, three, four?
20:09No.
20:12Excuse me.
20:14Oh, who could it be?
20:16If that's an actual theme song
20:18from something, that ringtone that Victor's got,
20:20let me know what it is, because I want to know.
20:22I like it.
20:23Hello, Jack. How are you, my friend?
20:25Good.
20:27How are you? Aye. Good for you.
20:29What do you want?
20:33A pint of lager for Jack, please, Bob.
20:35Oh, come on!
20:37You're bloody brilliant.
20:39No, I'm sorry.
20:41I'm sorry to pause again so quickly.
20:43I'm so, so, so, so sorry, but I need to get this off my chest.
20:45I hate people that do stuff like this.
20:47Growing up with my mum,
20:49again, maybe about ten or so years ago
20:51when I lived with her,
20:53oh, my word.
20:55She would literally ring me
20:57from the living room.
20:59I'm literally in the dining room.
21:01And she'd go, Kevin, can you turn down your computer?
21:03I can't hear over the telly.
21:05Well, clearly you can.
21:07And then she'd just ring me,
21:09Kevin, I need help with my phone.
21:11Come in here.
21:13I'd literally get up off your arse,
21:15walk ten paces,
21:17open the door,
21:19lean your head in and just go,
21:21Kevin, come and help me with my phone, please.
21:23That's all you need to do.
21:25Still talk to him when you're doing a piss.
21:27So, Jack, how many contacts do you have?
21:29Oh, right. One.
21:31Victor?
21:33One.
21:35Well, you've got a few toys of us
21:37and got yourselves a pair of Wayne's walkie-talkies,
21:39you couple of lullabies.
21:41To be fair, it would have been cheaper.
21:43Boys, are you wanting to add me to your contacts?
21:45No.
21:47Sure.
21:49Are you wanting my contact details, boys?
21:51No.
21:53Right, I've sent my number to both of your numbers.
21:55Isa looks really thin in this one.
21:57How do you know her numbers?
21:59How did I know your numbers?
22:01See?
22:03We still build up our contacts,
22:05especially when we go virile.
22:07Bye, Roger.
22:09Virile.
22:11Aye, you've no got whatever Winston's got.
22:13Shut your hole.
22:15We've got it in spades. How hard can it be?
22:17My favourite one of them is when
22:19the wee boy bites the other wee boy's finger.
22:21Aye.
22:23Oh, no, no, I like the newsreader boy
22:25when his family all burst in behind him.
22:27This is my favourite.
22:29Cliff Diver
22:31misses the water completely.
22:33Oh!
22:35You sicko!
22:37Oh, you sick bastard.
22:39Why would you watch that?
22:41Cos it's funny.
22:43He's just mushed
22:45eight million views.
22:47Right, that's what we'll do, then.
22:49I mean, falling off a bike, maybe.
22:51I'd like to film me stepping out in front of an 89 bus
22:53and getting splattered.
22:55Who would watch that?
22:57Me. A million times.
22:59Here he is.
23:01Scotland's angry grandpa.
23:03Aye.
23:05That's what they're calling you. Aye.
23:07That's my gimmick, boys.
23:09Goldie? Certainly not.
23:11Mineral water.
23:13Why watch the weight?
23:15Camera adds 20 pounds.
23:17Mineral water, eh?
23:19What's that Russian? He's went to Hollywood.
23:21You'll be forgetting your pals next.
23:23Eh...
23:25Tam, isn't it?
23:27I'm only winding you up.
23:29It's good to see you.
23:31Eh...
23:33What's this?
23:35Have you got malaria?
23:37Oh, no, I know, but hang on.
23:39I've been shaking that many paws, you know.
23:41You've got to be safe.
23:43You just don't know what's out there.
23:45I'll tell you this.
23:47You think you're a big shot.
23:49There's nae money in it.
23:51Well... I don't know.
23:53Opened that new bingo hall on Carson Street this morning.
23:55I've got...
23:57500 quid.
23:59Nice.
24:01Cash in hand.
24:03Nice!
24:05Let's face it, boys.
24:07You're analogue, and I'm digital.
24:09Winston.
24:11What?
24:13Can we add you as a contact?
24:15Shut it, Tadge-o.
24:17Shut it, Tadge-o.
24:21I feel he's all going to come crushing down, innit?
24:23How do we even get this up onto the World Wide Web?
24:25It's called top-loading.
24:27Now, you and me don't need to worry about that.
24:29Ice is going to help us by top-loading it...
24:31into the clouds or something.
24:33What are we going to do, mate?
24:35About ready.
24:37Ready? Let's do this.
24:41What you doing, old pal?
24:43Just feeding the dogs.
24:45Hey, classic.
24:47Sick?
24:53Oh!
24:55There's the wind blew my bun off.
24:57That's embarrassing. I hope you weren't filming that.
25:01Right, we're done.
25:03One view!
25:05Gold!
25:07Oh, I know. I'll say two views.
25:09Each of them watching it.
25:11It's better be good.
25:13We need to make a new video.
25:15Not good enough.
25:17Ma'am.
25:19The pain's gone to his head.
25:25Don't do a sigh.
25:27I'm sighing because I need to watch my race.
25:29There's a special horse in it.
25:31No, don't do a sigh.
25:33I need to watch my race.
25:35I need to watch my race.
25:37I need to watch my race.
25:39No, don't do a sigh.
25:41The South Korean
25:43overnight sensation.
25:45See if I knew what you were talking about.
25:47I'd be interested, but I'm not.
25:49See sigh.
25:51See sigh? Aye.
25:53See sigh.
25:55See sigh, see sigh, by the seashore.
25:57Why are you still on my doorstep?
25:59Sighed it off. Mad wee dance.
26:01Gangnam style.
26:03The whole world loved it.
26:05Sighs big bosses like.
26:07What's next?
26:09Sighs like that.
26:13What? That's not enough.
26:15Sighs bosses like that? No.
26:17Sighs like that. Raging.
26:19Like singing wee
26:21spinned like a pumpkin
26:23on November 1st.
26:25Like I caught sigh
26:27in something about a pumpkin.
26:29Now my horse is running and I need to see it.
26:31What I'm saying is don't be a cautionary tale.
26:33For one hit wonder
26:35you'll need to come up with something better
26:37than shut it Tadger.
26:41Laughs.
26:45I had a tenner on my Tadger.
26:47Laughs.
26:49It's a hit.
26:51Oh yes.
26:53We're a hit. You've got one
26:55hit and that was me checking I've uploaded
26:57it properly.
26:59Well we're humped. Oh don't Jack.
27:01If you throw one dart
27:03and miss the board what does that tell you?
27:05Well it means that you're shy to darts.
27:07No. You throw another.
27:09Then another. Then another one
27:11after that. Yep. And you keep throwing them
27:13until you have to take the dart board down
27:15and re-paper the walls.
27:17Laughs.
27:21Hey
27:23Mother
27:25Fortune
27:29How empty they
27:31can be
27:33Babe
27:35But when I
27:37hold you in
27:39my arms
27:43I'm so happy
27:45to be
27:47who cares for
27:49fame. Oh my word
27:51hang on. What was that?
27:53Oh. Piss off asshole. Sorry
27:55I've been dying. Oh wow.
27:57Hang on. But you've got
27:59also a couple of views. How many
28:01how many views was there?
28:07Seven views.
28:09We've got seven views.
28:15They're only
28:17passing
28:19through. Oh he's
28:21fucking challenged me.
28:23Oh that
28:25maybe he will die.
28:27Laughs.
28:31Ice bucket
28:33challenge
28:35wee bit passe boys.
28:37Yeah. Time to chuck the
28:39darts. Neither of you
28:41is a jockey Wilson.
28:45Hello boys
28:47Here. Do you want me
28:49to do the line? Aye go well.
28:51Shut it Tadja.
28:53We were actually watching this guy
28:55He's from Paisley
28:57He's brilliant that old duffer
28:59isn't he? That's the ticket.
29:01Funny isn't he?
29:03Yeah.
29:05Yes I am. Shut it Tadja.
29:07Pleased to meet you.
29:09Would you mind
29:11coming to the opening of the community centre tonight
29:13saying a few words. We don't have much money
29:15probably two hundred.
29:17Two hundred is fine.
29:19Great. See you later.
29:21Did you hear that?
29:23Two hundred pounds.
29:25That's the ticket.
29:31What are we celebrating?
29:33Getting out of the fame game.
29:35Face it Jack.
29:37Bobby was right.
29:39Winston has got something
29:41that we don't. Tadja.
29:43Winston has got talent.
29:45Cheers you tomato faced x-factor
29:47bastard you.
29:49Phone suit?
29:51Aye.
29:57Oh.
29:59Oh.
30:19Look what I've dug out.
30:23It is aye.
30:25Come on we'll get ourselves a wee laugh.
30:27We'll get ourselves a laugh.
30:31Look at the colour of my hair.
30:33Look at all that.
30:37I miss my Jean you know.
30:39I miss my Betty.
30:51Those poor men.
30:57I need to share
30:59this.
31:03This might go viral.
31:05Ladies and gentlemen a bit of quiet please.
31:09Here he is
31:11to open our newly refurbished
31:13community centre. The one
31:15and only Scotland's
31:17Angry Grandpa.
31:23How are you?
31:27How are you?
31:33It's good to be here.
31:35Stinking.
31:39Shut it Tadja.
31:41That's ancient Pata.
31:43My dad's into that shite.
31:49That's the ticket.
31:51No. Paterthy.
31:53Pater blagger you old shagger.
31:55Don't act off the stage.
31:57You're a fat bastard.
31:59This boy's getting me now Pater.
32:01Why are you even here?
32:03Wait a minute. I've got to.
32:05This is awkward.
32:09Clock these scissors.
32:11They're no blunt.
32:13It's no shut it Tadja.
32:15It's shut up.
32:25Jesus.
32:27Oh boy.
32:29Victor.
32:31Victor.
32:33Oh dear.
32:35Victor.
32:37Oh
32:39my head.
32:41I thought you were away there.
32:45Probable cause of death.
32:47Sesh.
32:55Hello?
33:01No.
33:03I'm not interested. Goodbye.
33:07Who's phoning you?
33:09CNN.
33:11It's you boys.
33:13You've made it.
33:15Ten million hits.
33:21Woah.
33:23Ten million views.
33:25Bloody hell.
33:37Oh wow.
33:39That's a price of fame
33:41for you though isn't it?
33:43Yeah it is.
33:53Oop.
33:55Oop.
33:57Oop.
33:59Oop.
34:01Oop.
34:03Oop.
34:05Oop.
34:07Oop.
34:09Are we done?
34:11We are most definitely done.
34:13Woah.
34:15I don't think.
34:17I don't think that Winston
34:19can appreciate the
34:21sign of the fame there.
34:23Oh boy.
34:25Oh boy.
34:29You know what? I'm surprised we haven't done
34:31an episode
34:33where they've sort of focused on
34:37the technology
34:39kind of aspect of things really.
34:41We might have done a little bit.
34:43But that's really the first big one
34:45that we've really done.
34:47And obviously at this point
34:49this would have been what about 2018?
34:512019 I think this episode would have been done.
34:53So only really a few years ago.
34:55Let me just
34:57I think I've got my list
34:59of them here.
35:01Yeah this episode was aired
35:03February 19
35:05on BBC Scotland
35:07June 2019
35:09BBC One so
35:11we're only talking five years ago actually.
35:13Wow that's a lot more
35:15recent than I thought.
35:19Yeah.
35:21That's the first episode
35:23we've really kind of delved really
35:25hard on
35:27technology and internet
35:29and stuff. Like I said we've done a little
35:31bit. But yeah that was the first big one
35:33and I enjoyed it.
35:35I enjoyed how
35:37they show how easy
35:39it is to become famous.
35:41Honestly like
35:43obviously I'm now
35:45I'm now in my third year of
35:47doing YouTube. I've got
35:49what? 1,360
35:51something subscribers I think
35:53at the time of me
35:55recording this.
35:57My highest video that I've ever done
35:59which was obviously the first game
36:01nearly 8,500.
36:03A lot of others
36:05probably ballpark
36:07anywhere up to 500 to 1,000
36:09ones that have been up for quite a long
36:11time.
36:13And yeah most of your
36:15average most recent ones probably
36:17you're lucky if I
36:19scrape 100 views. Which
36:21isn't really something that I worry
36:23too much about when I do this because obviously I'm doing
36:25this for me. I do it for
36:27fun. I love the interaction
36:29that I have with the community and in all
36:31honesty I'd rather have a smaller
36:33close knit community than having
36:3510 million subscribers who
36:37I can't connect with
36:39because I don't know them on a personal level.
36:41You think about
36:43in August when I did that
36:45bit for Jamie who
36:47was having a bit of a tough time, him and his partner
36:49when they were injured
36:51and of course I do my
36:53responding to your comments video every
36:55month where again I just feel
36:57that connection. Some
36:59of you, you know
37:01who you are. You think you
37:03wind me up. You don't.
37:05I do love you.
37:07Even though you think
37:09them too. They're going to have a bit of
37:11arguments back and forth.
37:13I love everyone. I love everyone who drops
37:15the comments for
37:17the most part. There's a
37:19few odd comments that do cross the line a little
37:21bit. But
37:23like I said, fame is
37:25a subtle thing
37:27and the internet is weird.
37:29All I've had over the last couple
37:31of months, I don't know why, but
37:33I constantly see these videos
37:35that...
37:37Oh God. I can't remember
37:39who did the song. Was it
37:41NSYNC or Backstreet Boys?
37:43Or was it...
37:45And I'm literally seeing
37:47people dancing to it.
37:53And it's like, which one is better?
37:55And you're seeing five people doing
37:57the exact same dance movement.
37:59Why is that
38:01even a thing?
38:03You know, I'm so out of touch.
38:05I mean, I call myself Kevin the Geek, but I'm really
38:07out of touch.
38:09I am
38:11Geek's youngest
38:13grandpa, it would seem.
38:15Because I just don't...
38:17I don't
38:19follow stuff really. Unless it's something I
38:21have a real interest in. Most of the time, I'm just like,
38:23what the hell's going on?
38:25But that was a great episode.
38:27That's an outro that
38:29is so rambling and I've really not
38:31spoken about much. So apologies
38:33if you stuck with me through that and didn't
38:35get anything.
38:37So next Sunday,
38:39of course, we will be doing episode two, which is
38:41Cat's Whiskers. The week after that,
38:43episodes three and four
38:45are the two episodes which I believe are
38:47a two-parter.
38:49So, we will
38:51see. We will see.
38:55Like I said, I'm still debating
38:57how I'm going to do it. Do I do
38:59both of them on the same day?
39:01Do I do...
39:03You know, one one Sunday,
39:05one another Sunday, but make the second episode,
39:07record that at the same time, and then make that early
39:09available on Patreon? I don't know.
39:11I'm still
39:13kind of deciding with that. I'm still
39:15deciding with a lot of stuff. But
39:17what I'm not deciding about
39:19is my love for you guys. So thank you very much
39:21once again for watching. Subscribe if you're new.
39:23Turn on notifications. Consider joining the Patreon.
39:25All the usual bits and bobs, but that is going to
39:27do for today. So thank you very much.
39:29And for now, my name's Kevin.
39:31I'm a geek. And you've been watching Kevin the Geek.
39:33Shut it, Tatcha!
39:35Goodbye.