Gogglebox NZ S1E01 (2024)
Gogglebox NZ S1E01 (2024)
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00:00Every evening in New Zealand, over 2 million of us spend the night on the couch in front
00:13of the TV.
00:18Somehow we find the time to watch around two and a half hours every day.
00:30We're going behind closed doors into living rooms to find out what Kiwis thought about
00:39what was on TV in the last seven days.
00:42We were invited to the wedding of the year and there was not a royal inside.
00:48We farewelled a legend and got more than we bargained for on naked attraction.
00:58What made us laugh, what made us mad and what made us cry.
01:10Find out what the nation was thinking this week.
01:19Recently retired couple Hills and Mary live with their 13 year old Brussels griffin Tebow.
01:26I can see the bad in anybody if I look hard.
01:31While roller derby aficionados Gem and Estelle get together most nights to watch a bit of
01:36tally.
01:37You're an awful human being, awful.
01:42Maureen, Myrtle and Sybil met when they all moved into the same retirement village, now
01:46they're best friends.
01:48Don't laugh too much, your teeth might land on the table.
01:53And meet Andy and Hamo, their best mates.
01:56Andy is kind enough to let Hamo live in his recently refurbished home.
02:00Why are you shaking your head?
02:02I know where this conversation is going.
02:06On Monday night we all settled in for the final of Westside.
02:10Love this programme.
02:12Family and friends of Wolf and Cheryl.
02:14We gathered here today.
02:15It looks like trash.
02:16It's Westside.
02:17So you watch the show all the time?
02:19Yeah.
02:20We travelled back in time to see the infamous Cheryl and Wolf West tie the knot.
02:24Oh baby I love you now.
02:31Oh look at those fishnet stockings.
02:34Fishnet's a wedding dress.
02:36When you've got a wedding at 12 but you've got to go floundering with the girls at 2.
02:43So it's how I introduced Gary to what life in New Zealand was like.
02:48So before we came home he watched Outrageous Fortune and Go Girls which was the North Shore
02:56and that was how he learnt about what life was like in New Zealand.
03:01Outrageous Fortune, educating non-Kiwis about being a Kiwi since forever.
03:10Wolf, please repeat after me.
03:13I Wolfgang West.
03:15This brings back all the memories doesn't it?
03:21No one looked like that at our wedding did they?
03:23No one looked like that at our wedding.
03:25No one can make me wear a veil.
03:28You've worn a veil.
03:30When?
03:31For my first wedding.
03:32Yeah.
03:36She looks beautiful.
03:38Oh beautiful.
03:41She should be wearing avocado shimmer eye shadow.
03:45And to cherish, to love and to cherish.
03:48From this day...
03:49Is it making me gloomy?
03:51Yeah.
03:56I Cheryl Miller.
03:58I Cheryl Miller.
03:59I Cheryl Miller.
04:01All you girls love a wedding.
04:03Love a wedding.
04:06From this day forward...
04:07From this day forward...
04:09From this day forward until death do us two part.
04:14Wolf and Cheryl will now exchange rings.
04:20Only do it once.
04:22Well, hard for you, I'm your third.
04:25Until I'm lucky honey.
04:27I'm a lucky, lucky man.
04:29You are a lucky, lucky, lucky man.
04:32The symbol of their eternal love.
04:35This ring, I thee wed.
04:37There we go.
04:40There they are.
04:42Two beginnings, two ends.
04:46No, no beginnings and no ends.
04:48Right.
04:50She looks like she doesn't have any diamonds on her ring.
04:52So what?
04:53So you don't need diamonds.
04:54Nah, I need a third ring actually.
04:56You're supposed to get a third ring after the first year of marriage.
04:58You're good, suffering.
05:02I now pronounce you husband and wife.
05:06Hey!
05:12Don't eat her.
05:13Gosh.
05:14Just about swallowed her.
05:15That's what they do these days.
05:17Just about swallowed them.
05:18I know, they lick it first and see if it tastes good.
05:23Get your mind out of the gutter.
05:25No, come down the sewer with me.
05:30Makes me want to renew our vows honey.
05:33One day honey, one day.
05:36Just about had enough.
05:39She's the mum.
05:42This off, this off, this off.
05:44Did you see that?
05:45Yeah.
05:49In true West style however, the romance was short lived.
05:53But you need to know that Wolfman's rich.
05:55Coming from you Rita West.
05:58Oh hang on, plot twist.
06:00Going on about family at the same time you're rooting for us.
06:04Rita, my husband.
06:07Show some respect, you're a guest here.
06:10Don't tell me to shut up you cheap slapper.
06:15Who did you kill?
06:16Blunt you alky cow.
06:19She threw a punch.
06:20That looked real.
06:23Take that, take that, and that.
06:25Well, this didn't happen at our wedding.
06:27That took a real turn for the worse, eh?
06:29I saw this out.
06:30Are you okay?
06:31Depends where you hold this, okay?
06:34You're not going to get what you want tonight.
06:36Bye.
06:38This would have been the meanest wedding in the world.
06:41I would have loved to have gone.
06:43I don't know if this is what I want representing us as a population.
06:47Look, to be fair Jen, you're a unique individual.
06:50Gary loved it.
06:52He was super excited about coming to New Zealand when he saw this.
06:55Do you really want to renew your wedding vows?
06:58You brought it up, didn't you?
07:00No, you kind of suggested it.
07:05Lee and George Mazzei have been married for 27 years.
07:09Between them, they have 11 children, including sons Quentin and Navajo.
07:15Oh, baby, you've been learning, haven't you?
07:19Clever. Oh, my boy.
07:27Ange works in the beauty industry.
07:29Her husband of 15 years, Tinks, sells luxury cars.
07:34Any woman I know that can outburp and outbap.
07:40At CentreCourt in the news this week was a sports story about fair play.
07:45The tennis world is rallying behind Serena Williams
07:48with men's and women's greats highlighting the double standards
07:51on display in the US Open women's final at Flushing Meadows.
07:54Isn't that what Donald Trump does?
07:56He's like, yeah, you're fired.
07:59I'm so supportive of her. Yeah, absolutely.
08:03I'm a woman. You're going to take this away from me?
08:06She's a loser.
08:08Yeah, she lost her shit, didn't she?
08:10It's the question that sparked fierce debate.
08:13You know how many other men do things that are...
08:15I don't think they do much worse than that.
08:17She's furious.
08:19Umpire Carlos Ramos slammed today for his handling
08:22of one of the most explosive moments in major history,
08:25issuing a third code violation to Serena Williams
08:28after she labelled him a thief.
08:30I feel sorry for him.
08:32Do you know how much she gets for umpiring? I don't.
08:34$634.
08:36Ah!
08:40She's really cool. She's outspoken. She stands her ground.
08:43And she does have awesome outfits, doesn't she?
08:46Oh, yes. They're awesome.
08:48That tutu!
08:50US Open men's finalists Novak Djokovic and Juan Martin del Potro
08:54today offering support for Serena and the women's game.
08:57Look at those skinny legs, will ya? Yeah, I know.
09:00I wonder how he can stand up in them.
09:02They're like P-sticks, aren't they?
09:04Even the king of the tennis tantrum, John McEnroe,
09:07backed Williams, admitting he said far worse during his career.
09:10You watch, look at his backside.
09:12He's got a tiny little backside.
09:14I'm not looking at his backside.
09:16Look at it!
09:18Well, it's the only bit that really interests me now.
09:23Oh, McEnroe, he was good in his day.
09:25Does he get really ragey? Yeah, he was Mr. Agro.
09:27He always goes ragey. Did he?
09:29Didn't he marry, um...
09:32Chrissie Fit-Lloyd. No.
09:34No, that was... wasn't that Greg Norman?
09:37Didn't he marry her? No.
09:39No, John McEnroe married...
09:41Chrissie Fit-Lloyd. No!
09:45He married...
09:47Listen to this.
09:49There's no equality when it comes to what the men are doing
09:52to the chair umpires and what the women are doing.
09:54I think there has to be some consistency
09:56across the board at every level of officiating.
09:58You owe me an apology!
10:00I have never cheated in my life!
10:02We have for years allowed these male sports people,
10:07particularly in tennis,
10:09to behave like absolute dicks.
10:12Throwing their rackets like children.
10:14And people are like, oh, you know, it adds.
10:16She does it and, my God, bad behaviour.
10:20It's like, no!
10:22The original advocate for gender equality in tennis,
10:25Billie Jean King, said on Twitter
10:27when a woman is emotional, she's hysterical
10:30and she's penalised for it.
10:32When a man does the same, he's outspoken
10:34and there are no repercussions.
10:36Exactly.
10:38When a woman is emotional, she's hysterical.
10:40Oh!
10:41Thank you, Serena Williams, for calling out this double standard.
10:44Oh, OK, he's agreeing. OK.
10:46More voices are needed to do the same.
10:48Ridiculous.
10:50Cheers.
10:54She's pretty aggressive, that old Serena.
10:56I still like her tennis outfit.
10:58It's really nice.
11:00Who did John, Mac and Romary?
11:07Tatum O'Neill.
11:09Boom! Boom!
11:11Boom, boom!
11:13There you go.
11:15There you be.
11:27These ladyfingers are boss.
11:29Oh, I didn't love them.
11:31Oh, the texture's not great, but the flavour's there.
11:34I feel like we've had very different reactions.
11:36I'm loving my noodles.
11:38Mm.
11:40And the ladyfingers were, mm, yeah.
11:42Maybe it's cos I don't like my noodles.
11:44Maybe it's cos you like ladyfingers.
11:46Could be.
11:48What's wrong with the noodles?
11:50No, this is bad.
11:52What do they need? Do you want salt?
11:54Nah.
11:56Soy? Nah.
11:58Fish sauce? Nah.
12:00OK, fine.
12:04On Friday, we watched TVNZ2's controversial dating show Naked Attraction.
12:10Stop it.
12:12From status symbols to status updates,
12:14dating in the 21st century has never been harder.
12:17This programme would have us believe
12:19that letting the desperate and dateless go au naturel
12:21would lead to true love.
12:23Oh, my God!
12:25This is Naked Attraction.
12:29Oh, is this this naked show?
12:31Oh, my gosh.
12:33Welcome to Naked Attraction.
12:35Oh, man!
12:37Nah, man.
12:39Whoa!
12:40Sexy men gonna come out of here?
12:42Ooh, yes, they are.
12:44No!
12:45You're gonna see penis.
12:46No, I'm not.
12:47Buttons, tops and fits.
12:49Ooh!
12:5226-year-old Alyssia had high hopes.
12:59I'm Alyssia. I'm 26.
13:01I'm a psychology student from London.
13:03Why would a psychology student go on a show like this?
13:05She's got a bad wave, too. Nice butt, though.
13:08Look at the way she's made up.
13:10Goodness.
13:12Now, listen, tell me a little bit about yourself.
13:14I'm quite confident, a little bit bougie.
13:17I mean, I'm not getting my kit off on TV.
13:19Like, that's just... It's just not happening.
13:21Get ready to close your eyes if you don't get to...
13:24Can you handle it?
13:26She's seen enough.
13:28She's seen enough.
13:29Look at Mum!
13:33Mum.
13:35Are you ready to play the game?
13:37I am indeed.
13:38All right.
13:40In front of us... Yeah?
13:42..we have six coloured pods.
13:45Inside each of them is a gorgeous naked man.
13:49They each have an attribute... OK.
13:51..that you have said... Yeah. ..that you find attractive.
13:53OK. Amazing.
13:55You've got to whittle them down from six to one.
13:57OK.
13:58Can you reveal the bottom half of the bodies, please?
14:11Oh, hell no!
14:14What? Here they are, Mary.
14:16Oh, my God!
14:18His bulimia was so dragging.
14:21Oh, yuck.
14:24Most disgusting sight you've ever seen.
14:27Ooh!
14:30Poor bastard. I mean, he's self-conscious as hell.
14:33Well, that's probably why they're all retracting.
14:35They're all getting a stage fright.
14:36Oh, it looks like he's dipped it in icing sugar.
14:40I don't know if I like a shaven pair of balls.
14:42Don't look, Jim.
14:44Nice. There's room to move on that one.
14:46No.
14:48Those ones have gone to the limit.
14:50Na-na-na-na-na. Na-na-na-na-na.
14:53Ooh.
14:55He did a dance with his.
14:58Based on naked attraction, 26-year-old Alicia
15:01has whittled six guys down to two.
15:04Ooh! She did pick that one.
15:06And this older one. He looks old.
15:08Ooh, yeah.
15:11Look at the face on him.
15:13I'm going to go for the older guy.
15:15I'm going with the older guy.
15:17He obviously lives at the gym, though, eh?
15:19You can tell he's a gym bunny.
15:21He's got a hell of a good body for a 55-year-old.
15:24So, boys, up until now,
15:27you have only seen Alicia fully clothed.
15:31All of that is about to change.
15:34Here she comes.
15:37Well, what is that?
15:40She's like Lady Godiva-ed it.
15:42Oh, my God!
15:44Oh, my God!
15:46Oh, my God!
15:48Oh, my God!
15:50Oh, my God!
15:52She has... She's bedazzled her vagina!
15:57Oh, well done.
15:59Oh, well done.
16:01That's cute, isn't it?
16:03That is well done.
16:05Alicia, you now have to make a decision.
16:07Who is it that you want to date?
16:09Oh, my God.
16:11Are you going to go for your silver fox, Roderick,
16:14or your younger man, Sam?
16:16Um, um, um...
16:19I'm going to have to go with Sam, Anna.
16:22Oh!
16:24Oh, oh, oh, oh!
16:26I'll have Roderick.
16:28Oh, you will not.
16:30Roderick, so very, very close.
16:33It's not a date on this occasion.
16:36Take home a smile.
16:38Yeah, but excited or what?
16:40I think so.
16:42Oh, he's not into her at all.
16:45Um...
16:47Yeah, he's got a nice bum.
16:49A tight bum.
16:51He's got a nice, tight bum.
16:53I can't eat alcohol after that.
16:55Christ on a bike.
16:57It's a very interesting concept.
17:04At the end of a busy working week,
17:06it was time for our favourite UK chat show host,
17:09Graham Norton.
17:11CHEERING
17:17I reckon some men with, like, their greyish silver hair,
17:20it's just really distinguishing, and I like it.
17:23But then it really rags me up
17:25how only his top lip is a bit darker.
17:27CHEERING
17:30I like his moustache.
17:32His what?
17:34His moustache. It's like an ombre.
17:36Oh, yeah.
17:38You see how it gets darker in the middle and then it fades out?
17:41Yeah.
17:43Do you think possibly that's from, like,
17:45some tea or coffee or hot chocolate or something
17:49just gets in there and stains it?
17:51Oh, thank you, thank you.
17:53Yes, very exciting.
17:55Unless he snorts chimney dust.
17:58On the couch, former First Lady
18:00and ex-presidential hopeful Hillary Clinton,
18:02promoting her memoir, What Happened.
18:13My namesake.
18:16Go, Hillary!
18:18I bought a Hillary supporters mug,
18:20which I like to toot around the office, yeah.
18:22Now, the second debate was the one I really highlight in the book.
18:26Yes, the looming one.
18:28He loomed over me.
18:30Yes, I mean...
18:32He, you know, he was very dominant, very, you know...
18:35He's a nasty shit, we all know that.
18:37She should have swung around and given him a pukana.
18:41It's like he's trying to creep up.
18:43Hillary Clinton just turned around and just...
18:47I really felt responsible for the loss,
18:50but I got home and, you know, put on some, you know,
18:53sweatpants and a fleece
18:55and kind of just wandered around.
18:57And then the next day, my husband and I went for a walk in the woods.
19:01What about Monica Lewinsky?
19:03Oh, it was her husband.
19:06Don't you remember?
19:08He was in office and she was here one moment
19:12and she was down on the floor the next moment.
19:14They need to get stronger zips in their trousers, the Americans.
19:18She kept the dress.
19:20Yes, I heard about that too.
19:22If you're having a clandestine relationship with the president,
19:27don't pretend like you don't know what you're doing.
19:31Own it.
19:33She was on her knees.
19:35She was on her bloody knees.
19:37Getting before the president.
19:39You know.
19:40Bowing to the president.
19:42Oh, now I know what you're talking about.
19:45You know what, honey?
19:47Oh, didn't you know that before?
19:49Oh, no, I didn't.
19:52I'm too innocent.
19:54Are you, darling? You don't bloody look it.
19:57You know, laughing is, as you are an expert at,
19:59the best cure for nearly everything.
20:01If you can get back the energy to laugh and make fun of yourself
20:04and, you know, just start having a good time again.
20:06I mean, I would, as you know, would have voted for her in a flash.
20:11Personally, for me, I don't give a hoot and root and tooty.
20:16Who runs the U.S.A.?
20:18Well, you should because it affects us.
20:20If you were going to send rockets someone into the moon,
20:23who would you get rid of, Trump or Hillary?
20:30Is that a difficult question?
20:32Normally, you prep for a debate
20:34because it's going to be to and fro with arguments.
20:37But he was playing just a different game.
20:39He didn't pay attention to what he was saying
20:41because much of it was untrue and really just silly.
20:45There's only one truth.
20:47There's not multiple truths.
20:49There's just the truth and your opinion of the truth.
20:52Correct.
20:53Oh, no. That's getting too deep.
20:55That's too deep.
20:56It's OK. You can be deep.
20:58Thank you, Mum.
21:00I can also be a politician if I want.
21:02Yeah, you'd be a strong, powerful woman that I am.
21:05Yes.
21:06Yes, you can.
21:07And that's the message that we're giving.
21:10Women can do anything.
21:12And it's been proved, hasn't it?
21:14Yeah.
21:15Over and over.
21:17MUSIC
21:26If you were going to pick the voice of God,
21:29who would you have it?
21:31No, it'd be like that movie...
21:33Morgan Freeman.
21:35Yeah, it'd have to be.
21:36You couldn't have anyone like...
21:38Liam Neeson's a strong voice.
21:40But if you were listening to that voice the whole time...
21:43No.
21:44Morgan is deep and soothing.
21:46Yeah, OK, that's fair. Yep.
21:49And how much shit that God has to deal with,
21:51he needs to be soothing.
21:53On Saturday night, our TV screens were bursting with talent.
21:57MUSIC
22:03You know, you can do that mouth thing, Raina.
22:06Yep.
22:08There you go.
22:09Why aren't you in America's Got Talent?
22:11Yeah, I should go in America's Got Talent.
22:13You should.
22:15What would be your talent that you would bring to the show?
22:20I can burp on demand.
22:23Not just any talent, though.
22:25This was American talent.
22:27MUSIC
22:36Oh, there's our Simon.
22:38And Simon.
22:40The man himself.
22:42I love Simon Cowell.
22:44I just want to say I love him.
22:47MUSIC
22:53Welcome.
22:55God, he's a walking muscle, isn't he?
22:58He looks very fit.
23:00Oh, yes, he looks very fit, doesn't he, Zara?
23:05Goddamn, that's some big-ass nipples.
23:08So, my name's Mary.
23:10And I'm Tice.
23:11We were married for six years,
23:13and we performed duo trapeze together.
23:15Look at her. She's big, too, isn't she?
23:17Look at her muscles.
23:23Tice, you actually can't see very well, can you?
23:26Yeah, I have a progressive eye disease
23:29that requires a cornea transplant.
23:32What if he can't see her properly when he catches her?
23:35So, you are going to be doing a trapeze act,
23:38and you can't really see?
23:39Yeah, we've had to rely a lot
23:41on just the feeling of what we do.
23:44I don't think I'd be doing a trapeze act without him.
23:47There's some major trust going on there.
23:50I feel where she's at.
23:52I know if I've done it right by the sound
23:55that her skin makes on my skin.
23:58They'll be married for a while.
24:00Yeah, but that doesn't save the day.
24:02Eh.
24:06Uh-oh. Here we go.
24:12Mmm.
24:15Invalid time.
24:19Whoa, look at that.
24:21Wow. She's pretty supple.
24:23Yeah.
24:26Fire! Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me?
24:32My hands are sweating.
24:34My feet are sweating.
24:38Ah!
24:41Oh, wow.
24:43Oh, he's going to do a death drop or something.
24:46Ah!
24:50Ah!
24:57That's right for himself! No!
25:01Don't put that up on your face!
25:04He's not really blind, for Christ's sake.
25:07This is insane.
25:09He's standing on his balls and he's blind.
25:11Ha, ha, ha, ha!
25:18Don't do it, don't do it.
25:20Oh, God!
25:24Ah!
25:27Oh!
25:30Ah!
25:32Jesus, George!
25:35Ah!
25:37Is she okay?
25:39Is she bent?
25:45It's okay. It's fine.
25:48Are you okay?
25:49We would like to try the blindfold trick one more time.
25:51No! No, it's fine!
25:56Oh, my gosh.
25:59Oh!
26:02It gets me all emotional.
26:04Oh, David, really?
26:06Poor little daddy!
26:09Poor little daddy!
26:11Bring out the tissues.
26:13Tissues.
26:21Māori Language Week triggered all sorts of debate.
26:24Oh, it's Māori week.
26:25There appears to be mass confusion within the government
26:28about its policy on te reo Māori in schools.
26:31Michael McRoberts.
26:32I've got a lot of time for him, eh?
26:33Yeah.
26:34The silver fox over there.
26:35We're a dark silver fox, yeah.
26:37He's fat.
26:38Did I tell you I played rugby with him?
26:40Yeah.
26:41He was second five for suburbs down in Christchurch,
26:44back in the 80s.
26:45Does he look as hot then as he does now?
26:47He was a slim young man, second five.
26:49Oh, he's delicious.
26:50The Māori Development Minister told the AM show
26:52it will be a core subject,
26:54compulsory.
26:55Why aren't you speaking in Māori?
26:57He doesn't know it.
27:01I don't know it and I'm Māori.
27:03Māori Language Week, a chance to celebrate te reo Māori.
27:07Māori Language Week!
27:09And for the Prime Minister to lament
27:11not being able to speak our native language.
27:14And it is one of my great regrets.
27:17She has the same regret as me.
27:18Oh, she's great, I like her.
27:20She's nice.
27:21She could take night classes.
27:22That's true.
27:23But shouldn't she learn?
27:24She might be limited on time.
27:25But yeah, I know what you're saying.
27:26She still has time to learn.
27:27She's holding out greater hope for her daughter Niamh.
27:32She, one day, will teach me.
27:34That's what I think will happen.
27:35And that will be a beautiful thing.
27:37She's got her second back quickly.
27:39It's cool to kōrero.
27:42What?
27:44It's cool to kōrero.
27:48What?
27:49Tēnā koutou, tēnā koutou katoa.
27:51Ko Jaina, taku ingoa.
27:55Um, excuse me.
27:57We'll integrate by 2025.
27:59Te Reo Māori is a core subject,
28:01interprimary and intermediate.
28:03Sorry, you won't get a bite out of me on that.
28:05Well, you need to bite.
28:07Honestly, you've got to have an opinion.
28:09No, not on that.
28:11It's too hot.
28:12I think the thing is,
28:13you're just going to have to get some specialist teachers
28:15in to be able to teach the te reo.
28:18Do you all know how to do that?
28:20Just give the teachers more money.
28:22I think that's a really good idea.
28:24I do think that's a good idea.
28:26I think we should all go out and protest.
28:29I think Mummy and Toby...
28:31Let's all have a march.
28:33We are, we are teachers.
28:35What do we, what do we, what do we want?
28:37We want money.
28:39I should never have taken you on that strike, Toby.
28:42Tahirua toriwha.
28:44Māori language will go far.
28:46Yeah!
28:48Got it!
28:50We would like to put a line in the sand
28:52and have te reo as core curriculum.
28:55And in case there's any confusion,
28:57core curriculum means compulsion.
29:00I think, honestly, I kind of,
29:03I would hate to see the Māori language die,
29:05but what's the point of making it compulsory in schools?
29:08I mean, it's not going to do our children any good.
29:11Bloody...
29:14Compulsory or universal?
29:16Universal. We want universal availability.
29:19Oh, Jacinda, you look like you've had a baby.
29:23The PM cautiously avoiding the C words, compulsory and core.
29:28Compulsory and primary and intermediate.
29:30It is integrated, it is integrated into our curriculum already.
29:33And core means compulsory.
29:35It's part of our curriculum, Tova.
29:37Compulsory can be integrative.
29:39Integrative is not necessarily compulsory.
29:41Winston Peters threatened her, saying get in line.
29:44Winnie the Pooh's not getting in behind it.
29:47New Zealand First is fresh from destroying Labour's plan to...
29:50Oh, don't wear that colour, Tova. It does nothing for you.
29:53You can bet Winston Peters wouldn't back compulsory te reo in schools.
29:56I didn't think that was the smartest alignment for those two parties.
30:01I hate Winston Peters.
30:03Oh, things could have gone worse, though.
30:05I agree with Winston.
30:06Shut up!
30:08Don't you ever say those words.
30:10Why not?
30:11Never.
30:13I agree with him.
30:28Little bear.
30:31Oh, bear doggie.
30:34I think Mum is spoiling the crap out of you.
30:36Yeah.
30:37What do you think, monkey?
30:40Roast chicken and rice cooked in chicken stock.
30:44Hey, come on, it's delicious.
30:49I might have a top-up.
30:55She's probably only here because she wants food.
30:57Someone has to feed her.
30:59Max, let it go. She wants to come to me.
31:01No, she doesn't.
31:04Does she, Dad?
31:05Yes, she does.
31:07Is she going to kill you?
31:08Oh, my Blakey.
31:10No!
31:12Shh, she doesn't give up.
31:14On Monday, the TVNZ1 quiz show The Chase was on.
31:17By working as a team, they have the chance to win thousands of pounds.
31:20There's just one thing standing in their way.
31:23The Chaser.
31:25The Chase is on.
31:28Ooh, here's our favourite.
31:30Guys, we've got to be here.
31:32When are they going to do a New Zealand version of this?
31:34I reckon it should definitely be on there.
31:36I reckon the accents and the Chasers are just too good, eh?
31:42Hello, and welcome to The Chase.
31:44Can a team of four beat one of Britain's finest quiz brains
31:46and take home thousands of pounds?
31:48Here we go.
31:49Dun-dun-dun.
31:50Dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun.
31:52Time to bring on The Chaser.
31:58Here we go.
32:01Dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun.
32:04It's the mastermind champion barrister that is Sean Wallace, the Dark Destroyer.
32:08Yes!
32:10It's our favourite Borgman.
32:13This guy's too good.
32:14Chase is going to win, yeah.
32:15Chase is too good.
32:16What do you think you'd be like in this one, Ace?
32:19I'd be horrible.
32:20I would have been kicked out first round.
32:22Remember, if the Chaser gets a question wrong,
32:24and the team get it right, they push him back one step.
32:26It's time for the final chase.
32:29Now, what kind of hot drink are chamomile flowers used to make?
32:32Tea.
32:33Correct.
32:34What country's flag has seven red and six white stripes?
32:37United States of America.
32:38Correct.
32:39Gary Olsen played Ben in what 90s sitcom?
32:41Gary Olsen.
32:42No, who's Gary Olsen?
32:44Oh!
32:45Sitcom.
32:46Willis, what you talking about, Willis?
32:47Oh, it's Gary Coleman.
32:49Keep it in the family.
32:50Stop the clock. That is wrong.
32:51We're going to go a different stroke.
32:53No, is wrong.
32:542.4 children.
32:552.4 children, never heard of it.
32:58She's very unhappy.
33:01She doesn't smell very nice either.
33:03It's fun, isn't it?
33:05Oh, is that you, Toby?
33:07You're the cat.
33:08Oh, Toby.
33:10She's wrecked.
33:12I can't believe you did that.
33:14She's leaving now.
33:16Do you need to go to the bathroom?
33:18Can we listen to this?
33:20What Italian motorcycle maker produces the Hyperstrada 939?
33:24Vespa.
33:25Stop the clock.
33:26Stop the clock.
33:27That is wrong.
33:28I can't even stand half the things he's saying.
33:30It's the accent.
33:31Is that a Porsche?
33:33We're going to go with Ducati.
33:34It's correct.
33:35We push the chaser back.
33:36Ducati is correct.
33:37Oh, yeah, boy!
33:40The inti is a former currency of what South American country?
33:45Fos.
33:46Stop the clock.
33:47Oh!
33:48He's nearly in tears.
33:49I don't think I've ever seen him do so badly.
33:51It's obviously hard, honey.
33:52We're not getting them either.
33:55Are you happy with that?
33:56I'd only guess Morocco.
33:58Peru?
33:59It's correct.
34:00Wow, look at that.
34:02They might do it.
34:04What star sign falls between March and April?
34:06Aries.
34:07Correct.
34:08What's 25% of 12?
34:10Four.
34:11Stop the clock.
34:12Oh!
34:13Woo-hoo-hoo!
34:16He's lost it.
34:18He knows it.
34:19I tell you.
34:20He's just about at the bottom.
34:22I am going to go on this show.
34:25Now, what colour cap and shirt does Nintendo character Luigi wear?
34:29It is green.
34:30Time is up.
34:31Oh, happy days!
34:33They won!
34:34Oh!
34:37Well done.
34:39Good show.
34:40What would you do with that money if you won?
34:43£10,000.
34:45It's about 20 grand.
34:47I'll buy a new car.
34:49What's wrong with your current car?
34:51Not very fast.
34:53Tuesday, we tuned in to a fascinating National Geographic series,
34:57Drain the Oceans.
35:00Deep below the Pacific Ocean lies a tectonic monster.
35:05What's dying today?
35:09We know more about the moon and stuff, about other planets,
35:13than we do about the ocean.
35:15It's a bit of a mystery.
35:18We know more about the moon and stuff, about other planets,
35:22than we do about the ocean floor.
35:24Really?
35:25Yeah.
35:27There's places in the ocean floor that we haven't even explored.
35:31Well, because it's just so bloody deep.
35:34Imagine if we could empty the oceans,
35:38letting the water drain away to reveal the secrets of the sea floor.
35:43I don't actually think we should do that.
35:45No.
35:46I think we quite like water.
35:48I think we need it.
35:49Yeah.
35:50Just for day-to-day.
35:51Just generally.
35:52Deep beneath the waves lurks a terrifying monster.
35:57Giant squid.
35:59Underwater volcano, actually.
36:01Not a squid.
36:03Underwater scanning technology,
36:06piercing the deep oceans,
36:08and turning accurate data into 3D images.
36:12Oh my God, how do they do that?
36:15We got very close to home.
36:18The islands of New Zealand lie directly on the Ring of Fire.
36:22Oh, New Zealand.
36:24In 2011, the country's second largest city, Christchurch,
36:28is devastated by a magnitude 6.3 quake.
36:32Oh my God, those poor people.
36:35Yeah, this was devastating, actually.
36:37Yeah, it was awful.
36:38I was in Wellington for the big earthquakes.
36:40Were you?
36:41Yeah, and the earthquake started, and I was like,
36:43everybody grab the walls!
36:47What did you think grabbing the walls was going to be?
36:50I don't know.
36:51Grab the walls!
36:53So everyone, like, you know.
36:57And I was like, hold on!
36:59It's going down!
37:04As the water drains away,
37:06it reveals the plunging walls of a vast undersea chasm,
37:11the Kaikoura Canyon.
37:13Why is that dangerous?
37:14Well, it would create currents and things, I would imagine.
37:18It would just make a bigger tsunami because there's more water.
37:22It could focus the energy of a tsunami
37:25towards a specific area of the coast.
37:28I liked your idea, Toby,
37:29that there could be more water because it's deeper.
37:33That was very clever.
37:35Thank you.
37:36Toby.
37:38Thank you.
37:39Lurking just north of the canyon.
37:41Hey, look at that.
37:42We can drive between the South Island and North Island now.
37:45We drained all the water out of it.
37:47Yeah.
37:48Bit lumpy, though.
37:49Imagine the four-wheel drive tracks.
37:52Four-wheel drive, you'd take a quad bike.
37:55So if we drain the water,
37:56we'd have a tourist destination in, like, a grand canyon?
38:00Yeah, like a skate park.
38:03Big.
38:05You know if they built a bridge from New Zealand to Australia,
38:09it would still be cheaper to fly than drive?
38:13And quicker?
38:15Yeah, you're right, yep.
38:17Because even that distance, I mean, it's a fair distance.
38:19Like, would you be able to do it in a day?
38:212,200 kilometres.
38:23Nobody knows when the Hikurangi subduction zone will fracture again.
38:28But when it does,
38:29geologists estimate the tsunami wave from the mega quake
38:34will take only seven minutes to reach New Zealand's capital city, Wellington.
38:39Hey, guess what, guys?
38:40It's actually really scary because, like, every two weeks
38:43or every week or every second day,
38:46there's an earthquake, like, in all different countries.
38:48You know these earthquakes, like, all the time throughout the day?
38:52Just really small ones.
38:54Oh, my God, we haven't even got a first aid kit.
38:57Well, I've had a survival kit.
38:58What are you going to do?
38:59I've got my panadol and I've got my flashlight.
39:02Panadol, yeah, we'd need panadol after an earthquake, that's for sure.
39:04You'll have a sore throat.
39:06LAUGHTER
39:15OK, would you rather...
39:18take a razor blade and cut your eye in half
39:21or swallow 10 needles?
39:24Or...
39:2610 needles.
39:28Why would you even do that anyway, though?
39:30She said, would you rather.
39:32So just pick one.
39:35Sunday night featured Revenge blockbuster Furious 7.
39:39Finish him.
39:41Rest now, little brother.
39:43What I sell you won't last long.
39:49Oh, I love these movies, eh?
39:51He's so good.
39:52Seems a bit over the top, doesn't it?
39:54Well, you know, his brother got hurt.
39:57Somebody has to pay.
39:58Oh, you mean his brother.
39:59No, that's...
40:00Don't ever do that again.
40:02In the movie, hard man Vin Diesel and his crew
40:05think that they've finally left their wild lifestyle behind them.
40:10Come on, doll.
40:11So where are you taking me?
40:13They say an open road helps you think
40:16about where you've been,
40:18where you're going.
40:20I'm going to count the amount of sayings of hers.
40:29That you're trying to show me.
40:32That.
40:37Race wars.
40:41We used to come here.
40:43Come here?
40:44We invented it.
40:51The film is famous for fast cars, stunts and scantily clad women.
40:59Who's cleaning cars in bikinis?
41:02What, is there $10 involved?
41:07No!
41:08I hate these films.
41:10I'm only watching it because of you.
41:14Thank you, darling.
41:16He lets her drive his car.
41:18Why don't you let me drive yours?
41:20Because he has like 90 cars.
41:23How can you drive a manual in jandals?
41:29Oh!
41:33Oh my, did you see that, Mum?
41:35That's impossible.
41:36Yeah, you already slide off.
41:38Yeah, you can't do that.
41:45I'd much rather watch him do this than bloody Tom Cruise.
41:48He's believable.
41:50Dead, but believable.
41:52The film also marked the final appearance of actor Paul Walker,
41:55who died during filming.
41:57You know Paul Walker, the main actor?
41:59Yeah.
42:00He died in a car crash, in real life.
42:02Yeah.
42:03It's CGI, so his brother's pretending to act as him.
42:07So it's not actually him in the movie.
42:10Oh, really?
42:11Yeah.
42:12They're like twins.
42:13They're like twin brothers, yeah.
42:15Because his two brothers look real similar to him.
42:17It's like my own brother...
42:19He looks nothing like you.
42:20No, he looks very similar to me.
42:23That's why I call him the spare me.
42:27Hey!
42:36It's never goodbye.
42:39Do you think they're saying that because he's actually not there?
42:42Yeah, I reckon they definitely were like...
42:45It's like family.
42:47No, that's not true.
42:52The most important thing in life will always be the people in this room.
42:56Right here.
42:57Right now.
42:58A little bit from here.
43:26Yeah.