The Last Run (2004)

Super Cult Cinema

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Transcript

00:00:00What do you mean you can't find my reservation?

00:00:22I'm sorry sir, I can't find it.

00:00:26When did you book your table?

00:00:27Valentine's Day, when I couldn't get a reservation.

00:00:30When did you call to confirm?

00:00:31Oh.

00:00:32Sorry, I couldn't decide what to wear.

00:00:46Right this way.

00:00:49When you've got the beautiful girl, it changes everything.

00:00:53We met in April, in the park at my accountant league softball game.

00:01:01She caught my foul ball and I asked her if she had filed.

00:01:04I prepared her first tax return and together we found a lot of good write-offs.

00:01:09I was in love.

00:01:11I couldn't get enough of her, and everything we did was special.

00:01:17By October she confessed that I stole her heart, so for Halloween I told her we should

00:01:21go as convicts.

00:01:23She could lock us up together and throw away the key.

00:01:27Christmas came when I met her parents.

00:01:29Her dad said I had a firm handshake and a face you could trust.

00:01:32Her mom liked the way I made her daughter laugh.

00:01:35For our first Valentine's Day we drove up the coast and stayed at a little bed and breakfast.

00:01:40Let's just say we had a lot more bed than breakfast.

00:01:44A couple months later was our one year anniversary from the day we met.

00:01:47It was the best year of my life.

00:01:51After Halloween, we had a photo album, we had a history, we were a real couple.

00:01:56She was my angel.

00:01:58We listened to each other's favorite songs.

00:02:00She bought me clothes, we finished each other's sentences, we talked about the future.

00:02:06Our second Valentine's Day and she was now officially my longest relationship.

00:02:11But it all still felt wonderfully new.

00:02:14For her birthday I took her to New Orleans for Mardi Gras.

00:02:16We saw the radiators and ate crawfish.

00:02:19We drank way too many hurricanes.

00:02:21And every guy threw her beads.

00:02:23She didn't even have to pull up her shirt.

00:02:26Just look at her.

00:02:27My Chloe.

00:02:28One of a kind.

00:02:30Sunshine in a bottle.

00:02:32Beautiful.

00:02:44This is so good.

00:02:46But this is going to mean an extra half hour on the treadmill.

00:02:49I'm sure we could burn it off later.

00:02:52Maybe we should ask for the check.

00:02:58Happy Valentine's Day.

00:03:00Steven, what's this?

00:03:02Just open it.

00:03:09Oh my God.

00:03:12It's beautiful.

00:03:17You, come here.

00:03:19You, come here.

00:03:50I love you so much.

00:03:52I love you too.

00:03:55I love you.

00:04:19Don't stop.

00:04:21I love having sex with you.

00:04:25No.

00:04:34You should get that.

00:04:35No.

00:04:37There's one thirty-nine-thousand in it.

00:04:39It could be an emergency.

00:04:41It's alright.

00:04:43I want you to time me.

00:04:45I

00:04:52Think you should get that

00:04:58Hey, I'll answer

00:05:03Hello, okay, I was sleeping

00:05:15I

00:05:43Can't wait to taste you again

00:05:45I just got a bikini wax

00:05:55Who's that that's my poker boyfriend hit her again, what the fuck it was can't wait to taste you again

00:06:03Steven

00:06:05You were listening who gives a shit

00:06:07Did there's some guy saying how I can't wait to taste you and you you got a bikini wax for him

00:06:11I got the bikini wax for you. What's that? It doesn't matter. I

00:06:18Love the bracelet now, I'm gonna give you your present

00:06:22Kobe I'm serious

00:06:25Who'd you get the bikini wax for you Steven? I got it for you

00:06:36Wait, this is bullshit

00:06:41Did you have sex with this guy

00:06:47You did the right thing I can't believe you had the balls to break up with a piece of ass that hot

00:06:51But you did the right thing. It's not like I had a choice. She was cheating on me

00:06:55Oh, come on. You think it was the first time this is just the first time you caught her

00:06:59Look any girl that beautiful is always gonna cheat. Why you knew Chloe was cheating on me

00:07:04No, not specifically but think about it

00:07:06She looks like every guy's fantasy every guy's rock stars athletes billionaires, they're all gonna make a play for her

00:07:13She's only human Steve. Oh, come on. They don't always cheat

00:07:17Yeah, they do

00:07:19So they get what they think they're worth

00:07:21Never heard of a supermodel dumping a rock star Stephanie Seymour broke up with Axl Rose now. She's with a billionaire just the way it works

00:07:28Whatever

00:07:30I'm not gonna be part of that ridiculous pecking order

00:07:33I'm better off without her. I

00:07:35Did the right thing I just can't believe you let her keep the bracelet

00:07:59I made the worst mistake. I gotta get her back. I gotta get her back. No way you did the right thing

00:08:05He's strong. Hey, tell him Clancy. Yeah, you're a catch drink it here six years. You've got a heart of gold

00:08:11You can hold your sauce

00:08:13Deserve better Steve. I know I know you're right. I mean shit. I can't stop thinking about her

00:08:18I look at the bright side at least you're single

00:08:21About my problems. I never been asked what you got Alexis Valentine's Day a bathrobe from Victoria's Secret

00:08:27That's it. No longer. Nope. Just a big maroon terrycloth bathrobe

00:08:32I was gonna get her one of those sexy outfits, but you walk into that place and everywhere you look in there

00:08:36There's life-size posters a half-naked supermodel

00:08:39So so it just kind of ruined it for me. What are you talking about? Listen, I bring home that bra and panties

00:08:44I know Alexis isn't gonna look like one of those girls. It's gonna make me want to fuck her even left

00:08:47It's a difference. We don't even have sex now. I'd like to keep it that way

00:08:52Chloe looked like one of those girls. Yeah, not quite and now she's sucking somebody else's cock Steve. What's your point?

00:08:58What if I never do better than her what if she was the ultimate no, I'm 28 years old

00:09:03The rest of my life could all be downhill. Let me tell you both the thing

00:09:07600 years ago men wanted full-bodied pale-ass women. I mean look at the paintings

00:09:11They were thought your Victoria's Secrets were skinny peasants

00:09:16Look at the paintings. He's got a point Steve. I'll forget about the paintings. I

00:09:21Gotta get her back

00:09:25I'll give her a second chance

00:09:28Steven

00:09:30This is for the best

00:09:32I've been trying to tell you you've been trying to tell me anything you slept with someone else. It's more than that though. I

00:09:40Feelings. Oh, I can't believe this

00:09:47About three months

00:09:50Even you and I we just

00:09:53We haven't been involved don't turn this around like I'm the one that did something wrong here, okay

00:09:57You're the one who's been cheating on someone and I'm the one who's you know

00:10:01Willing to forgive you

00:10:09Steven

00:10:12It's over

00:10:16Fuck that cunt I can't believe you had another chance to get the bracelet back and you let her keep it

00:10:20What am I supposed to do rip it off her fucking wrist? Do you think cost two grand Jesus Christ?

00:10:26Yeah, what do you think this guy's like he's probably a ninja what does it matter you got to get over her fast

00:10:31All right, I've been there

00:10:33No, you don't know what this feels like I still love her and I'm never gonna get over this bullshit

00:10:38You don't love her. You just love how fucking hot she is. That's not true. We had a bond

00:10:42It was love and I still love her

00:10:50I go fuck as many girls as I possibly could until I forgot about the bitch. That's not gonna work. Yeah, it will believe me

00:10:58You need to go on a run. No, I can't have Chloe then I gotta get a girl even hotter than Chloe

00:11:06At least I was still inside the circle of beautiful people still connected to the scene that was something Chloe couldn't take away from me

00:11:13Hey Felix, thanks for emailing me about this party. Don't thank me

00:11:17I didn't find out you and Chloe broke up until today. I never would have invited just you

00:11:24Thanks, anyway, stop thanking me not for something I never would have done

00:11:39And I buy that drink

00:11:41Um, it's open bar, I know I was just kidding

00:11:55You should really tip more when it's open bar

00:12:12I

00:12:14Mean, there's no way I'm gonna let him just jet me in. I wouldn't

00:12:19Straight wait, you're Aaron, right?

00:12:21Yeah, hi. How do I know you? We met to my ex-girlfriend Chloe. We all went to a party together

00:12:28Are you still dating that?

00:12:30hockey player

00:12:32God, no, he got traded to the worst team in the NHL

00:12:36Oh

00:12:37What did you say your name was again Steven Goodson? Are you in the business? No, I'm an accountant. Oh

00:12:45Do you have your own firm?

00:12:48No

00:12:50Just accountant come on Chloe never would have dated just an accountant. There's gotta be something special

00:12:59Well, maybe I can get you a drink and we'll see if we can figure it out

00:13:02I

00:13:05Actually, I'm waiting

00:13:11Who's Leo

00:13:15How am I supposed to know that Leo is Leonardo DiCaprio I'm not a first-name basis with the guy

00:13:21Yeah, well, they all are every fucking one of them

00:13:24Oh

00:13:27Toby Leo Justin Ashton

00:13:30Vin it's all a bunch of shit. I felt like a chump. I mean, it's like they're on another planet. I don't speak the language

00:13:39Hey good the very best the least the girl like that will do for you is make you miserable bullshit

00:13:44The guys that have sex with these girls go through four or five a year and they're heartbroken

00:13:47well, yeah, that's because in between they're chilling on some beach in San Tropez or

00:13:52Cutting their next album or buying another company you don't even have a car

00:13:58Fuck I

00:14:01Hate this game. I never should have told Alexis father. I could shoot my low 80s

00:14:05I mean I could play the part

00:14:07Release the right car spruce up my wardrobe make up some, you know power rap. So I sound like I got game

00:14:13It ain't worth it Steve. Oh, you're only gonna get hurt

00:14:17No, I could do this

00:14:19Yeah, I can make this work

00:14:40What's it you talking you talking to me

00:14:49Yeah, I drive an s600 AMG

00:14:51What's that? What's that? Oh, yeah, I get these all handmade. It's our favorite on their parents

00:14:57Do you like them?

00:15:00Fit yeah, I buy distressed companies break them up. It's all my highly lucrative highly lucrative. What's that?

00:15:07Yeah, I'm producer. Here's movies

00:15:09packaging a film right now with Leo and Toby Ben then

00:15:12the guys

00:15:14Building the house in Sun Valley home with stars

00:15:17Goldie hangs out there with Kurt. What are the Christmas party?

00:15:22Nothing here. Thank you

00:15:23the register

00:15:25You do look familiar. You do look

00:15:28the gym the gym

00:15:31Yoga st. Bart's

00:15:34St. Bart's, I love it there. I summer there. How's it gonna ask then but Sun Valley's better

00:15:40less developed more intimate

00:15:42I

00:15:49Can't wait

00:16:00They please Stephen G

00:16:05Sorry, man, you're not on the list

00:16:07I just flew in from Geneva.

00:16:09The headwinds were brutal. My office must have forgotten to call.

00:16:12Here.

00:16:14I'm sorry for the inconvenience.

00:16:16All right. Let's go.

00:16:19Dad, you're joking. We need a minute.

00:16:21What?

00:16:22Wow. It sounds like you have so much going on.

00:16:25Yeah. I like to stay busy.

00:16:27You know, at a certain point, it's not even about the money anymore.

00:16:29It's just about building a legacy.

00:16:31I know what you mean.

00:16:34Listen, I was invited to this after-party,

00:16:37and I'd really like to invite you,

00:16:40but I don't know if it's cool.

00:16:48It's for Matt and Ben. They're in town.

00:16:52What's that?

00:16:54Matt and Ben? It's cool.

00:16:57We have the same money manager.

00:16:59Really?

00:17:01Who?

00:17:07Hyman Robb?

00:17:11Oh, yeah.

00:17:13I think I met him at a Maxim party.

00:17:20I felt like a con, but at least I was free from the bounds of the cubicle

00:17:23and back in the land of the Chloe's.

00:17:25Guys were looking at me with envy again.

00:17:27Women were checking me out like I had something rare to offer.

00:17:43A peck on the cheek?

00:17:46Well, she might not have been letting me in,

00:17:48but at least I was in the game.

00:17:50It was just a matter of time.

00:17:53It's been a week.

00:17:55Three messages, and I haven't heard back. I want to kill somebody.

00:17:58She probably figured out you were lying.

00:18:00No way.

00:18:01When she came over for drinks, how'd you explain your one-bedroom apartment?

00:18:04I told her my penthouse loft was being renovated,

00:18:06and it was a corporate apartment. And I hate hotels.

00:18:08George Clooney probably called her.

00:18:10What are you talking about?

00:18:11You were out of your element. She could sense it.

00:18:13She's gonna milk you dry.

00:18:15Hey, I got a little action.

00:18:16Girls like that are used to getting fucked by guys who fuck a lot of super-hot chicks, okay?

00:18:20They give off a different pheromone.

00:18:22Oh, come on. That's not true.

00:18:24We're talking lesbians. You've been out of the game for three years.

00:18:27So what should I do?

00:18:28Settle yourself down.

00:18:30Calm your nerves.

00:18:31Reacquaint yourself with your essence healed.

00:18:36What are you, Dr. fucking Phil all of a sudden?

00:18:38I'm trying to tell you something, Steve. You're not even listening.

00:18:40You need to go down to the minors, all right?

00:18:42You need practice. You need to get your confidence back.

00:18:45Then maybe you can get another Chloe without all the bullshit.

00:18:47I hated lying.

00:18:48Well, of course you did. You don't have it in you.

00:18:51I know. I hated pretending I was someone else.

00:18:53Now you're stuck with an $1,800 a month car lease.

00:18:55And a $9,000 watch. And all the shit I bought her.

00:18:58Yeah, that's a hefty tab for a little action in a world-class case of blue balls.

00:19:01Yeah, but I'm not going to find another Chloe down in AAA.

00:19:04So go out and find another model and try to fuck her.

00:19:06But you know what? You're not ready and neither is your bank account.

00:19:08So picking up a bunch of sixes and sevens is the answer?

00:19:10No, of course it isn't.

00:19:12Fuck sixes and sevens. I'm talking fours and fives.

00:19:14And yeah, it is.

00:19:16So you feeling better?

00:19:17No, not really.

00:19:19Thanks for getting up so early to meet me anyway.

00:19:21No, no problem. The old man loves me.

00:19:23Since when?

00:19:25Why don't you come by tonight? Alexis is going out.

00:19:27I told Rich and Bruce to come by.

00:19:29Smoke a little herb, play Vice City on my $17,000 plasma screen.

00:19:32You know I can't get anywhere near a PlayStation.

00:19:34When NBA Slam Dunk came out, I played like 40 hours straight.

00:19:37I think I'm just going to see a movie.

00:19:38Oh, come on. Alone on a Friday night? You'll feel like a loser.

00:19:40Yeah.

00:19:46It's so wrong that that's a fucking uniform.

00:19:52You know, it's these magazines that are the devil, man. Look at this.

00:19:55That's why you're so fucked up.

00:19:57She's so hot, it's ridiculous.

00:19:58How much?

00:19:59Three for one.

00:20:00White collar, general population.

00:20:02No, strictly club fat.

00:20:03It's three years of jail time for one year with Heidi.

00:20:05Other way around. One year of jail time for three years with Heidi.

00:20:07But I'm talking like lab pools and shiatsu, like total Robert Downey Jr.

00:20:11With DVDs, cell phones.

00:20:13What about you?

00:20:14Nah, forget about it. Jail's jail.

00:20:16I would, however, chop off my pinky toe with a meat cleaver.

00:20:20You're a sick bastard.

00:20:22Oh, what? You're not twisted? Come on, you're obsessed.

00:20:25Hey, how come you got all these smart, cool girls that are college educated

00:20:29and come from good families and have straight teeth and hit the gym

00:20:32and you don't give them the time of day, right?

00:20:34You want some girl with a perfect body, probably dropped out of high school,

00:20:38fucked some photographer and then became a model, right?

00:20:40That's what you want as an educated man? That's fucked up.

00:20:42What's wrong with me? Why the hell do I still want that?

00:20:45Because you've been brainwashed, man.

00:20:47You grew up on Playboy and now everywhere you look there are models

00:20:51and they're selling everything. You know what you want to buy?

00:20:54Them.

00:20:58I'll see you later, man.

00:21:00At least see an action movie.

00:21:18Hi.

00:21:32Not always.

00:21:34They're all out of Virginia mints, so I got you gummy bears.

00:21:42Destined to be one of the most romantic movies of all time.

00:21:46They're all out of Virginia mints, so I got you gummy bears.

00:21:54Destined to be one of the most romantic movies of all time.

00:22:07What are you doing here?

00:22:08I want the bracelet back.

00:22:09What? Why?

00:22:11Just get it. I'll wait here.

00:22:12Stephen, it was a gift.

00:22:13No, no, because every time you put that bracelet on,

00:22:15I'll be announcing to the world that I'm a loser.

00:22:17Like a big neon sign flashing, Stephen is a loser!

00:22:20Stephen is a loser! Stephen is a loser!

00:22:23Oh, crack.

00:22:24Just get the bracelet.

00:22:26Fine. I'll get you back the bracelet.

00:22:37Here.

00:22:38I didn't ask for the blowjob back.

00:22:40I knew the bikini wax was for her.

00:22:47It's bad math to begin with.

00:22:49What are you talking about?

00:22:50Chloe, she's too old for you.

00:22:52She's 18 months younger than me, Jack.

00:22:55It's not enough.

00:22:56Half your age plus seven, that's the winning formula, right?

00:22:59Well, you're only three years older than Alexis.

00:23:01Yeah, but her dad's sporting eight zeros, buddy,

00:23:03and I'm gonna be leasing a new 911 through the company.

00:23:05Yeah, I just wish I didn't know she was with someone else already.

00:23:08Like they say, ignorance is bliss.

00:23:10That's right. Stupid people are the happiest people I know.

00:23:12And people with no ambition, too, right?

00:23:14They're the lucky ones.

00:23:15They're like, I just got a truck. I'm so damn happy.

00:23:17That's not what I meant.

00:23:19Hey, here's to Mick Jagger.

00:23:21It was his birthday yesterday.

00:23:22So what?

00:23:23He puts on his pants one leg at a time

00:23:24and has to shit half an hour after Chinese food,

00:23:26just like the rest of us.

00:23:27What do you think he wished for?

00:23:28I don't got a clue.

00:23:29Same thing he wishes for every year.

00:23:30What's that?

00:23:31To be Mick Jagger for another year!

00:23:33You guys are both deranged.

00:23:34Mick's got everything he wants.

00:23:35He's got everything he wants.

00:23:37Mick's got everything.

00:23:38He's got a beautiful wife,

00:23:39beautiful ex-wife,

00:23:40beautiful girlfriend.

00:23:41He never has to wait in line,

00:23:42never sees a bill,

00:23:43never opens a piece of mail.

00:23:44It's all taken care of.

00:23:45That motherfucker hasn't flown commercials since the 60s.

00:23:48And you think some model ever dumped Mick Jagger?

00:23:50Hell no!

00:23:51And all that stuff makes him happy?

00:23:53Fuck yeah.

00:23:54Absolutely.

00:23:55You both still have a lot to learn.

00:23:57It's not about all that bullshit.

00:23:58If he can still look at himself

00:24:00without just seeing good hair and big lips,

00:24:02but a man he respects, then fine.

00:24:04But if not,

00:24:05fans worshipping him ain't gonna make him whole.

00:24:07At the end of the day,

00:24:08it's about having one true friend at your funeral.

00:24:13What the hell are you talking about?

00:24:15He's got Keith!

00:24:16I just hope.

00:24:17I mean, I really, I fucking pray

00:24:18that everyone gets to be a rock star

00:24:20in just one of their lives.

00:24:21He has to reincarnation.

00:24:26Hi.

00:24:27Thank you so much for coming.

00:24:28You should.

00:24:29I'm so glad to see you guys.

00:24:31Okay.

00:24:32All right.

00:24:33Oh, you made it.

00:24:34Thank you.

00:24:35Bye-bye.

00:24:37She's so sweet.

00:24:38Jack?

00:24:40Did you give your little brothers alcohol?

00:24:44Just a little vodka, sweetheart.

00:24:46Jack, they're ten.

00:24:48It'll put hair on their chest.

00:24:53Come on, Jack.

00:24:54It's time to mingle.

00:24:55Sure, sweetie.

00:24:56Fellas, help me out.

00:24:58Boys.

00:25:00Boys.

00:25:06I can't believe this is actually happening.

00:25:09Hell's getting mighty chilly right now.

00:25:14Hi.

00:25:15Hey, hi. How you doing?

00:25:17Hurry up. My father wants to make a toast.

00:25:19Hi.

00:25:20Whoa, whoa.

00:25:21What is she doing here?

00:25:22Steven's coming.

00:25:23I have no idea.

00:25:26Hopefully he won't show.

00:25:28Yeah, I'd make her off.

00:25:31You know, I don't know if you two have met my daughter and her fiance.

00:25:35It's a pleasure.

00:25:36Your father never stops talking about you.

00:25:38You're a lucky man.

00:25:40This is my girlfriend, Chloe.

00:25:42Yeah, I know Chloe.

00:25:45Congratulations, Jack.

00:25:48Hey, I think it's time for a toast.

00:25:51Could I have your attention, please?

00:25:53Everyone.

00:25:55First, we would like to thank you all for sharing this evening with us.

00:26:00And I'd like to wish my lovely daughter and my soon-to-be son-in-law

00:26:05a long, beautiful life together.

00:26:07With many children.

00:26:10I can't believe you didn't warn him.

00:26:12How am I supposed to know her new boyfriend is one of his clients?

00:26:14I'm as surprised as you are.

00:26:15Yeah, I doubt that.

00:26:16I mean, Jesus Christ, I look like an asshole.

00:26:18I gotta get out of here.

00:26:19Would you just relax?

00:26:20Look, the best thing you could do right now is find a chick and take her home.

00:26:23You know, that guy is over two inches taller than me.

00:26:25Listen, listen.

00:26:26He's, he's, he's an upgrade.

00:26:28What are you talking about?

00:26:29I mean, not to shit on your funeral, but it's a classic upgrade scenario.

00:26:32Ross is a little older, he's a little taller,

00:26:34he's slightly better looking,

00:26:36and if he's one of the old prick's clients,

00:26:38he's definitely got a lot more cash.

00:26:40No, fuck Chloe.

00:26:41She upgraded on you, he's gonna upgrade on her.

00:26:43It's upgrade karma.

00:26:45All right, five years from now, when that motherfucker has even more cash,

00:26:48she's not gonna know what hit her.

00:26:49He's gonna have some 19-year-old farm girl straight off the bus,

00:26:52and she's gonna be out on her ass.

00:26:53And we'll see her with her tits drooping and her ass sagging,

00:26:56mumbling to herself outside a Bloomingdale.

00:26:58Why can't we kill that? I gotta do something now.

00:27:00Then turn it up a notch, okay?

00:27:01Go on a run, like in college.

00:27:02Spring break?

00:27:03Remember, we'd fuck as many girls as possible in a week.

00:27:05No, I never went on a run.

00:27:06Yeah, you did.

00:27:07You were with me sophomore year.

00:27:08We went to South Padre.

00:27:09You were ballistic.

00:27:10Three girls that week.

00:27:11No, I wasn't.

00:27:12Sophomore year, I had mono.

00:27:13All right, senior year.

00:27:14Cancun.

00:27:15Eight girls, six nights.

00:27:16Remember that?

00:27:17No, I went skiing with my parents.

00:27:20Well, then I wouldn't be a very good friend if I didn't point out the obvious.

00:27:23You, uh, you've gotten very little pussy.

00:27:26Jack, what if Chloe was the one?

00:27:28Oh, there is no the one.

00:27:30That's the biggest crock of bullshit going.

00:27:32It's worse than the Bible.

00:27:33You're just too fucked up to see it right now.

00:27:35Okay, fine.

00:27:36But you gotta do it with me.

00:27:37Steven, I'm engaged.

00:27:38We're at my $300,000 engagement party.

00:27:40Well, I'm not gonna do it without ya.

00:27:42I mean, she's still out there.

00:27:44Oh, Steve, look at that.

00:27:46You see that?

00:27:47Do you see that?

00:27:48Do you see that?

00:27:49Everyone's looking at him like he's the man.

00:27:51You know, I was the man.

00:27:52For three years, I was the man.

00:27:53That fucking bitch.

00:27:55Look, just forget about her, all right?

00:27:57Go on and run.

00:27:59I'm drowning.

00:28:10Oh, my God!

00:28:13He doesn't love you like I love you, Chloe.

00:28:16Nobody can.

00:28:18And nobody ever will.

00:28:20Steven, I'm sorry.

00:28:22I love you, too.

00:28:24You're right.

00:28:25He's a fucking pussy.

00:28:27Yeah!

00:28:28Chloe!

00:28:29What are you doing?

00:28:31Hey, Steve.

00:28:33Hey.

00:28:34Hello?

00:28:36I gotta do something.

00:28:38Sometime.

00:28:39London?

00:28:40Hey.

00:28:42Steven, what are you doing?

00:28:47Steven, what's wrong with you?

00:28:59I'm sorry I was such a downer.

00:29:01Don't worry, man.

00:29:02We've all been there.

00:29:04I'm sorry about this thing with Chloe.

00:29:06I hope you're all right.

00:29:07Look at him, sweetheart.

00:29:08He's not all right.

00:29:09Well, you're a good guy, Steven.

00:29:10You deserve more.

00:29:12I'm sure you'll start feeling better in the morning.

00:29:14You ready to go?

00:29:15Uh, is it okay if I take Steve out for a drink?

00:29:19You've been drinking all night.

00:29:21Well, he's not ready to be alone, sweetheart.

00:29:23I'll just take him for another cup of coffee.

00:29:25You're not gonna take me home on the night of our engagement party?

00:29:28Jack, it's all right.

00:29:29No, it's not all right.

00:29:30I'm not gonna leave you like this.

00:29:31Come on, sweetheart.

00:29:32We'll grab a quick drink and I'll be home soon and we'll snuggle.

00:29:35Fine.

00:29:37Just not too late.

00:29:38You're the best.

00:29:45Thanks.

00:29:49College girls are the definition of the minor league.

00:29:51And you're so sure I'm gonna hook up with one tonight without lying my ass off?

00:29:54These girls have been programmed since grade school

00:29:56that this is the time in their life they're supposed to do all of their fucking.

00:29:59Mix that with two-for-one kamikaze?

00:30:01This is the time in their life they're supposed to do all of their fucking.

00:30:03Mix that with two-for-one kamikaze?

00:30:05It's looking pretty good.

00:30:07All right.

00:30:12All right, what about that one?

00:30:15Her neck's too long.

00:30:18Okay, how about, uh, how about her?

00:30:22Her eyebrows are a little off.

00:30:31What about that chick?

00:30:33She's got bulky calves.

00:30:34Are you kidding? Would you stop?

00:30:38How about one of them?

00:30:42I don't know.

00:30:43I mean, now I don't even know what to say.

00:30:45It's not what you say, it's how you say it.

00:30:47Whatever comes out of your mouth, you gotta be saying to yourself,

00:30:49I'm gonna fuck this girl, I am gonna fuck this girl.

00:30:52They pick up on it, they feel the vibe.

00:30:54And that's it?

00:30:55Yeah, but you gotta believe me.

00:30:58All right.

00:31:00All right, I'm going in.

00:31:04I'm gonna fuck this girl.

00:31:06I'm gonna fuck this girl.

00:31:08I'm gonna fuck this girl.

00:31:10I'm gonna fuck this girl.

00:31:13You're so rude, man.

00:31:15Thanks a lot.

00:31:16I wanted him to kiss me.

00:31:18This guy's dressed like my stepfather.

00:31:20Hey.

00:31:21Hi.

00:31:24So, where are you from?

00:31:26Kansas City.

00:31:28Really?

00:31:32How long have you lived here?

00:31:34Can you believe how many guys hit on me?

00:31:36Two years.

00:31:37I'm a sophomore.

00:31:38Oh, that's great.

00:31:39That's great.

00:31:40Anyway.

00:31:42So, how old are you?

00:31:49Where are you from?

00:31:50How long have you been here?

00:31:51How old are you?

00:31:52Do you want to have sex?

00:31:55That's what everyone says.

00:31:58What should I say?

00:31:59I'm just trying to get to know you.

00:32:02It's getting worse.

00:32:04You want me to tell you what to say to pick me up?

00:32:09Girl.

00:32:10You need new lyrics, chachi.

00:32:14You're kind of harsh.

00:32:17And you're still standing there.

00:32:19Seriously.

00:32:20Go home, bubba.

00:32:21Fuck off.

00:32:26Bye.

00:32:29Way to go.

00:32:31Anyways, he had this great car with like 20 inch rims.

00:32:34Hey, how'd it go?

00:32:38They're all boyfriends.

00:32:39Fuck them.

00:32:40Just keep at it.

00:32:41Half these girls are from D.C. anyway.

00:32:43How do you know they're all from D.C.?

00:32:45Because half these girls are dumb cunts.

00:32:47Steve-O, this is Amy.

00:32:49She'd like to show me her dorm room.

00:32:50How sexy is that?

00:32:51Nice to meet you.

00:32:53I'm from Omaha.

00:32:56Jack, I'm just going to get out of here.

00:32:57I'm over it.

00:32:58I feel like you could dunk my head in a barrel of tits

00:33:00and I'd come out sucking my thumb.

00:33:03Hey, excuse me.

00:33:04Can we get another round?

00:33:05I'm not a waitress.

00:33:07I'm a barback.

00:33:10Wow, how about her?

00:33:11She's got low self-esteem.

00:33:13She's also got a big ass.

00:33:15Even better.

00:33:16The others are too hot.

00:33:17That's real cool.

00:33:18I can only imagine what you're going to say about me.

00:33:21Oh, baby, you've got a great ass.

00:33:22I just hope I get the opportunity to see you naked.

00:33:24Well, you better get me that drink.

00:33:26I'll get it.

00:33:27Then I'm out of here.

00:33:38Aren't you a little overdressed to be hanging out in a divy college bar?

00:33:41We just came from his engagement party.

00:33:44Oh, that's a real stand-up move.

00:33:46What are you going to do after the wedding?

00:33:47Go to a strip club?

00:33:49Sure, it's a possibility.

00:33:52So are you as big an asshole as your friend?

00:33:55Uh, no.

00:33:56You don't understand.

00:33:57I'm heartbroken and miserable.

00:33:59Oh.

00:34:00So you decided to hit on stupid college girls to repair your wounded ego.

00:34:04Yeah.

00:34:05But it's kind of backfired.

00:34:08Well, don't worry.

00:34:10Night's still young, and girls are only getting drunker.

00:34:13Dumber.

00:34:16Look at that one.

00:34:22Not bad.

00:34:23Go for it.

00:34:24You even have an in.

00:34:27You can light her cigarette.

00:34:29Got any matches?

00:34:32Happy hunting.

00:34:39I'm going to fuck this girl.

00:34:41I'm going to fuck this girl.

00:34:42I'm going to fuck this girl.

00:34:44Not yet.

00:34:45Not yet.

00:34:46Not yet.

00:34:47Not yet.

00:34:48Not yet.

00:34:49Not yet.

00:34:50Fuck.

00:34:51Fuck.

00:34:52Fuck.

00:34:53Fuck.

00:34:54Fuck.

00:34:55Fuck.

00:34:56Not yet.

00:34:57Not yet.

00:34:58Not yet.

00:34:59Not yet.

00:35:00Not yet.

00:35:01Not yet.

00:35:02Not yet.

00:35:03No!

00:35:04I didn't know I was going to do this tonight.

00:35:06If I did, I would have taken a shower.

00:35:08For me.

00:35:10I mean, that was really phenomenal.

00:35:16You know, you can stay if you want.

00:35:18Oh, gee, thanks.

00:35:20You're a real sport.

00:35:21I didn't mean like that.

00:35:22I meant, I'm comfortable with it if you want to stay.

00:35:24No, it's sweet, really.

00:35:26But I always find that whenever I do this and stay over,

00:35:28I never get a good night's sleep.

00:35:30It's nothing personal.

00:35:31No, that's cool.

00:35:35So you do this a lot?

00:35:37If I want to do it, I do it.

00:35:38And I don't waste time feeling guilty about it.

00:35:41Besides, after that wobbly redhead's puke hit your shoes,

00:35:45I knew you were an easy target.

00:35:47And a cute one.

00:35:49Really, it had nothing to do with my smooth line about the naval ring?

00:35:52Oh, real smooth.

00:35:56Let me clue you in on something.

00:35:59Most of the time, when you think you've picked up a girl,

00:36:02she's really picked you up.

00:36:04It's got nothing to do with what you tell them

00:36:06or what bullshit rap you throw down.

00:36:08She's, you know, just got an itch.

00:36:11She needs it to be scratched.

00:36:14God, it took me three months to sleep with Chloe.

00:36:18Not every chick's a model bitch who uses her pussy as a commodity.

00:36:24Some of us just like to fuck.

00:36:34I love you so much.

00:36:41Oh, God.

00:36:44You're bidding me for bear wing on Monday.

00:36:46Bear wing on Monday.

00:36:47I love you so much.

00:36:48I love you, too.

00:36:52Oh, fuck.

00:36:54Motherfucking bitch.

00:36:57I can't believe she's still under my skin.

00:37:06Did Galetas know what time you came in?

00:37:08She was on the couch fucking waiting for me,

00:37:11watching Brain Man.

00:37:13How pissed was she?

00:37:14You mean?

00:37:15I told her to go shopping with her mom.

00:37:17Hey, fuck all that melodrama.

00:37:18Tell me how it felt to get some of the strange.

00:37:21You know, I realized it was the first time I had sex

00:37:23that wasn't about anything else but sex.

00:37:25There was no romance.

00:37:26I wasn't dating her.

00:37:27She wasn't a girlfriend.

00:37:28It was wild.

00:37:30She was a sexual athlete.

00:37:32See, that shit wasn't even hot.

00:37:34Yeah, I know.

00:37:35That's the problem.

00:37:36All I could think about was Chloe.

00:37:38Yeah, but don't worry about it.

00:37:39This is what you need.

00:37:40See, every girl you fuck puts more distance

00:37:41between you and Chloe.

00:37:43The more you fuck, the easier it'll be to forget.

00:37:4610 or 15 girls later, you'll feel like a new man.

00:37:49I don't know.

00:37:50Trust me.

00:37:52Until then, you're on sexual probation.

00:37:54Now, give me the details.

00:37:57What was her pussy like?

00:38:04Making a coffee run.

00:38:05You want some?

00:38:06Uh, yeah, sure.

00:38:08Decaf, though.

00:38:09Make sure it's decaf.

00:38:10No problem.

00:38:27What about this one?

00:38:29Wow, you look beautiful.

00:38:30That one's great, too, sweetheart.

00:38:32Well, this one is to wear to the brunch

00:38:33the day after the wedding.

00:38:34The last one was to wear to the cocktail party

00:38:36before the rehearsal dinner.

00:38:38I know.

00:38:39I think they're both great, really.

00:38:41Thanks.

00:38:43Oh, and the wedding invitations.

00:38:45We need to make a decision really soon

00:38:47because they have to go out in less than two weeks.

00:38:49Yeah, I'm on it, sweetheart.

00:38:50I sent the samples of the ones you like to the house,

00:38:52and I've already spoken with the wedding planner.

00:39:03Hello.

00:39:04It's me.

00:39:05I've got to talk to you.

00:39:06Hey.

00:39:07Uh, we've got to go out tonight.

00:39:09You've got to meet me at Clancy's.

00:39:11I'm freaking out over here.

00:39:13Well, it's 4 o'clock.

00:39:14Alexis is still buying clothes.

00:39:15I don't think I can do this shit again.

00:39:17Well, it doesn't have to be a late night.

00:39:19I don't think I can get away with it.

00:39:21Just try to, okay?

00:39:23Make no promises.

00:39:24Yeah.

00:39:26So where's your partner in crime?

00:39:27He's supposed to be here in a half hour.

00:39:29I don't know.

00:39:30He's been shopping with Alexis all day.

00:39:31He probably couldn't get away.

00:39:32I know what that's like.

00:39:33My lady?

00:39:35She'd freak if she knew I was sitting in a bar right now.

00:39:37You would have thought the smell of beer and cigarettes

00:39:39on your clothes five nights a week

00:39:40might have given it away by now.

00:39:42She knows he's out.

00:39:43It's not this place.

00:39:44Yeah.

00:39:45She thinks I'm crazy.

00:39:47I'm not crazy.

00:39:48I'm not crazy.

00:39:49I'm not crazy.

00:39:50I'm not crazy.

00:39:51I'm not crazy.

00:39:52I'm not crazy.

00:39:53I'm not crazy.

00:39:54She thinks I'm at a business dinner.

00:39:56You're a friggin' manager at Kinko's.

00:39:57Who are you out to dinner with?

00:39:58No, no, no.

00:39:59I got a locket.

00:40:00She doesn't grill me.

00:40:01Steve-O!

00:40:02Don't listen to anything these retards are telling you.

00:40:04Plancy, give me the usual.

00:40:05This round's on me.

00:40:06I'm another day closer to being obscenely wealthy.

00:40:10So what do you think?

00:40:11You ready to go get some pussy?

00:40:12Jack, you just got engaged.

00:40:13Oh, grow up, rookie.

00:40:16God, look at those beauties.

00:40:20All right.

00:40:21You crazy?

00:40:22They're perfect, man.

00:40:23They're less than a year old.

00:40:26Hey, I can't stay out all night.

00:40:28Of course you can't.

00:40:30Why do you let her keep you on such a short leash?

00:40:32You realize how much money she has?

00:40:34You realize how much money I'm gonna have the second I say I do?

00:40:36Yeah, golden bars.

00:40:37Platinum.

00:40:38Platinum.

00:40:39Come on, grab a chick, get a lap dance,

00:40:40see if you can pull her out of here.

00:40:41Let's go.

00:40:47You ready for a dance?

00:40:49Yeah, sure.

00:40:50Good.

00:40:51I'm gonna wait for the next song.

00:40:54So, uh, my friend and I were thinking

00:40:57that you and one of your friends should come back to my place later

00:40:59and get a drink or something?

00:41:02Yeah, like that might happen.

00:41:05What?

00:41:07Well, come on, what's the take to get one of you guys out of here?

00:41:10You have to ask, baby doll.

00:41:11You can't afford it.

00:41:14Oh, yeah, I like this one.

00:41:15Dawn.

00:41:16Sinfully naughty.

00:41:18I've had my eye on her a couple days.

00:41:19Look, I specialize in top-class adult entertainment

00:41:22in your home or hotel room.

00:41:24Very athletic, very outgoing, open-minded,

00:41:27charming, and need I say super friendly.

00:41:30Generous VIPs only because I'm worth it.

00:41:32Sounds accommodating.

00:41:33I mean, I can't believe how many hot girls are out here.

00:41:35Hey, look, which one do you want?

00:41:37Whoa, hold on, hold on, right there.

00:41:39Bridget.

00:41:40Oh, God.

00:41:41Former penthouse pet.

00:41:42I am university educated, articulate,

00:41:45elegant, sophisticated, and unpretentious.

00:41:48I cater exclusively to distinguished gentlemen

00:41:50who yearn for only the best

00:41:52and appreciate the finer things in life.

00:41:54That's what I'm talking about.

00:41:55Make the call.

00:41:56I'm all about the finer things.

00:41:57I can't believe we're going to do this.

00:41:58It's going to be sick.

00:42:03It's been an hour, man.

00:42:04Where the fuck are these bitches?

00:42:05Just hang out.

00:42:06I'll call some other ones.

00:42:07No, fuck it, I'm tired.

00:42:08I'll call you in the morning.

00:42:18Good evening, gentlemen.

00:42:22What the hell's going on?

00:42:24Hey, is there a problem?

00:42:26Yeah.

00:42:28You.

00:42:30Where's the girl in the picture?

00:42:32Fine, you want us to leave?

00:42:33No, no, no, just hold on a second.

00:42:34Just let me talk to you first.

00:42:35I'm not hooking up with that little pig.

00:42:37I'm going to pay for both, okay?

00:42:38It's just, I'm out of time, so I'm going to go home.

00:42:40You're going to go home?

00:42:41Call me tomorrow.

00:42:42You're going to leave me?

00:42:43Give me the playboy play tomorrow, okay?

00:42:44Good luck.

00:42:45Hi, come on in.

00:42:46Sorry about that.

00:42:47What do I owe you guys?

00:42:48400 each?

00:42:50Plus tip.

00:42:51Okay, plus tip, great.

00:42:53I should get a fucking rebate for you.

00:42:55You should be handing out coupons.

00:43:01Ladies.

00:43:02Hey.

00:43:03Hi.

00:43:04How you doing?

00:43:05I'm a little tired.

00:43:06Good, you want to back it up?

00:43:07Rim job, tea bag, what do you want, guy?

00:43:09Let's do it.

00:43:18Hey.

00:43:19Hey.

00:43:20Hey.

00:43:21Hey.

00:43:22Hey.

00:43:23Hey.

00:43:24Hey.

00:43:25Hey.

00:43:26Hey.

00:43:27Hey.

00:43:28Hey.

00:43:29Hey.

00:43:30Hey.

00:43:31Hey.

00:43:32Hey.

00:43:33Hey.

00:43:34Hey.

00:43:35Hey.

00:43:36Hey.

00:43:37Hey.

00:43:38Hey.

00:43:39Hey.

00:43:40Hey.

00:43:41Hey.

00:43:42Hey.

00:43:43Hey.

00:43:44Hey.

00:43:45Hey.

00:43:46Hey.

00:43:47Hey.

00:43:48Hey.

00:43:49Hey.

00:43:50Hey.

00:43:51Hey.

00:43:52She didn't wake up until 1030 and then she showered.

00:43:55You kidding me, you pay her to leave, didn't she read her hooker handbook?

00:44:00I cut you boys some fresh melon balls.

00:44:04I'm exhausted.

00:44:06Wish you'd have got a little morning pick-me-up.

00:44:07I was out of money.

00:44:09Believe me, she didn't look the same.

00:44:11Chloe looked like an angel in the morning.

00:44:12Well, you can't get girls like Chloe on the internet so get that shit out of your head.

00:44:14You should feel good.

00:44:15She'd feel good.

00:44:16I know, I know, yeah.

00:44:19Deacon, if you really wanna get over Chloe,

00:44:21you should get out there and start dating again.

00:44:24I have this friend, Felicia, she's pretty.

00:44:26She's got a great job.

00:44:28She's got a great sense of humor.

00:44:31We should get together and have dinner this week.

00:44:36What's she really like?

00:44:37She's perfect.

00:44:38She's a dirty little naughty hoe.

00:44:39I'm pretty sure Alexis' father banged her

00:44:40a few summers ago when she interned for us.

00:44:42Nice.

00:44:46Here's that escrow report.

00:44:48Here's that escrow report.

00:44:50Here's that escrow report.

00:44:52Here's that escrow report.

00:44:54Here's that escrow report.

00:44:56Here's that escrow report.

00:44:57Here's that escrow report.

00:45:00What?

00:45:01I'm still waiting for the Schneider report.

00:45:04Is it finished?

00:45:05Um, not yet.

00:45:09I've just been a little distracted.

00:45:11Pull your head out of your ass, okay?

00:45:13If you're dealing with some personal issue,

00:45:15Deal with it on your own personal time.

00:45:17All right.

00:45:18Thank you for the support.

00:45:19Hey, if you want support, go to an AA meeting.

00:45:21I got a department to run.

00:45:23What is this?

00:45:25This memo is a week old.

00:45:27Clean up this shithole.

00:45:34And the flowers?

00:45:35I can't even believe it.

00:45:36My father is having thousands of white orchids

00:45:40flown in from Hawaii on a special climate

00:45:42controlled plane.

00:45:43It's going to be the most beautiful wedding ever.

00:45:45Right?

00:45:46I'm sure it'll be in town and country.

00:45:49Oh, and honey, I feel so horrible.

00:45:50I missed your engagement party.

00:45:51I heard it was wonderful.

00:45:52I just couldn't reschedule my meeting in Brussels.

00:45:55Sounds like you have a very interesting job.

00:45:57Felicia is the youngest portfolio manager at her firm.

00:46:01And I'm sure by far the hottest.

00:46:06You know, that's a little sexist.

00:46:09But at the same time, I'm a little bit flattered.

00:46:13Huh.

00:46:14Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

00:46:18Excuse me.

00:46:24My father, honestly?

00:46:26What kind of wedding is that?

00:46:29Steven?

00:46:30Yeah.

00:46:32Oh, my god.

00:46:35Amelia?

00:46:37Well, we haven't seen each other since.

00:46:43High school?

00:46:46Wow.

00:46:47Epic.

00:46:50What are you doing these days?

00:46:51I was in Costa Rica for four years teaching English.

00:46:55And now I'm teaching second grade.

00:46:58How have you been?

00:46:59Great.

00:47:02I'm an accountant.

00:47:03So that's, um, you know, whatever.

00:47:06But other than that, I'm good.

00:47:08I'm really good.

00:47:11Um, well, that's great.

00:47:14God, it's really nice seeing you.

00:47:16You really, you look, you look great.

00:47:20Um, well.

00:47:25Yeah.

00:47:29Just move slow with me, still fragile.

00:47:31Hey, hey, hey, buddy.

00:47:32You ready for another drink?

00:47:33Yeah.

00:47:35I have to go to the ladies room.

00:47:42Jack.

00:47:44This is Nicole.

00:47:47Oh, the one with the joker?

00:47:48Yeah.

00:47:50I went to high school with her.

00:47:52Oh, yeah?

00:47:53Did you bang her?

00:47:53No.

00:47:55But I always wanted to.

00:47:57Why?

00:47:57She's not that hot.

00:47:58Yeah, but she was cool.

00:48:00You know, she was always cool.

00:48:01You don't know that.

00:48:02There's no way.

00:48:03I went to high school with her.

00:48:04I had to speak in English.

00:48:05You can't know what you really think about a girl

00:48:06until you fuck her.

00:48:07Because until you fuck her, how you feel about her

00:48:09and everything, it's all clouded

00:48:11by wanting to fuck.

00:48:15That's right.

00:48:16So, think he's got a big dick?

00:48:21I have no idea.

00:48:23Oh, come on.

00:48:24Like, you've never accidentally, like,

00:48:26rubbed up against him to check it out?

00:48:28No, he's Jack's best friend.

00:48:30So what?

00:48:31Aren't you curious?

00:48:32No.

00:48:33Well, I'll let you know.

00:48:36Oh.

00:48:48OK, um, I don't want to lead you on.

00:48:52It's all right.

00:49:01Seriously?

00:49:02Um, I mean, I don't do that on the first date.

00:49:04OK?

00:49:05Like, no intercourse.

00:49:08All right.

00:49:11You want another drink?

00:49:12No, no. I mean, we can still fool around.

00:49:17I'll give you head.

00:49:19But only if you go down on me, too.

00:49:25Uh, that, that sounds fair.

00:49:35And with that, the floodgates were open.

00:49:47Every night, I was out on the hunt, looking for the kill.

00:49:50For every one girl that rejected me, I took down five.

00:49:52It's over.

00:49:53You need to go down to the miners.

00:49:54And for every girl I took down,

00:49:55You need practice, you need to get your confidence back.

00:49:58I wanted ten more.

00:49:59Then maybe you can get another Chloe without all the bullshit.

00:50:03Not yet!

00:50:04Not yet!

00:50:05I'm gonna fuck this girl.

00:50:06I am gonna fuck this girl.

00:50:12That's right, baby.

00:50:13My life was one hot, wet porn, and I was the star.

00:50:16Bon Jeremy had nothing on me.

00:50:18Except, maybe, three inches.

00:50:26And in this haze of decadence, I found clarity.

00:50:30No more worrying about the jumbo mortgage,

00:50:32or the right wash on my denim.

00:50:34No more yucky, wet dreams of perfect credit and financial freedom.

00:50:38I was living for today.

00:50:39Embracing many basic needs.

00:50:41Food, shelter, chasing ass, and chasing more ass.

00:50:53Steven, what the hell is going on?

00:50:56You've been wearing this suit for two weeks.

00:50:58And I thought I told you a hundred times to clean up this mess and get organized.

00:51:02I'm running out of patience with you.

00:51:05And I know that's not email, it's porn.

00:51:09Fuck you.

00:51:13What did you just say?

00:51:17I said fuck you.

00:51:19You insensitive, cocksucking asshole.

00:51:24You can't talk to me like that.

00:51:26You know there's a recession going on?

00:51:28You know what that does to the job market?

00:51:30Fuck the job market.

00:51:32And fuck this job, it's a slow death.

00:51:34You think I want to end up like you, you rat-raced fuck?

00:51:36Work, spend, acquire, consume, get fat, then fucking die?

00:51:40Well, suck my motherfucking balls.

00:51:43Fuck you.

00:51:44Don't think you can come back here.

00:51:46Get out of here.

00:51:47You fucked a whore in Vegas.

00:51:49Get out of here.

00:51:50I bought her for you.

00:51:51Get out of here.

00:51:52And she was fucking ugly with a beard.

00:51:55It's all the cost of charity.

00:51:57Are you laughing?

00:51:58Is there something funny?

00:52:03You, Ginger, are hot.

00:52:10Thanks, Steven.

00:52:12You want another?

00:52:15How about we leave here?

00:52:19And we go somewhere a little more...

00:52:23You want to go in the champagne room?

00:52:26No.

00:52:27Like, I mean...

00:52:29Like, like...

00:52:30Private, private, you know?

00:52:32Like, uh, like back to my apartment.

00:52:37That kind of private, private is expensive, expensive.

00:52:41Get what I'm saying?

00:52:43Yeah, but I already charged up like $1,400 with you.

00:52:46Well, what you spend in here has nothing to do with what you spend out there.

00:52:50And I don't take credit cards.

00:52:55Well, how much more do you want?

00:52:59Well, I don't think I could leave the club for less than $1,000.

00:53:05I can't even get that out of ATM now.

00:53:10Sorry, Stevie.

00:53:12Why don't you come back when you decide to crack open your piggy bank?

00:53:15Wait a minute.

00:53:16Wait, wait.

00:53:21I don't want to be lonely.

00:53:24You, uh, want another dance?

00:53:28No.

00:53:36I want more.

00:53:44Bye.

00:53:45It's my mistake, I know.

00:53:49Are you sure you're all right?

00:53:51Yeah, I'm fine. Thank you for helping me out with this stuff.

00:53:54Yeah, yeah.

00:53:55Sorry, Mr. Getson, but this credit card was denied.

00:53:58Oh, that's cool. I'll just pay cash.

00:54:02What, are you kidding me? It's like $19.

00:54:04Yeah, but I use my credit card a lot lately, so it probably doesn't get the payment.

00:54:07Here you go.

00:54:08Thanks.

00:54:11You gotta take it easy at those clubs, man. You look a little frayed.

00:54:14What are you gonna do tomorrow?

00:54:15I'm gonna meet Alexis, help her pick out some expensive ass shit that we're gonna register for.

00:54:19I'll call you after.

00:54:20All right, man. Thanks for the bike.

00:54:22I'll see ya.

00:54:23Jack was right. It was time for me to pull myself back together.

00:54:27People dig themselves out of ruts every day.

00:54:30How hard could it be?

00:54:33Let's go.

00:54:41Stick your fingers in her pussy, let me lick it.

00:54:45Oh, Stevie, you are so good.

00:54:47That's right, baby. Not as dirty as my money.

00:54:51So, the offer tonight again? A thousand bucks each?

00:54:53Yeah, for tonight.

00:54:55Use your ass.

00:55:03Come on.

00:55:04Get that sexy thing out of there.

00:55:06That's some new girl. Thinks her shit doesn't sing.

00:55:08Go bring her over here. Go get her.

00:55:10We're not enough for you?

00:55:12Stevie, there's not enough for this whole fucking placery.

00:55:15Go, go, go. Bring that bitch over here. Go.

00:55:20Hey, guys.

00:55:23Excuse me. I've got a request for you over there.

00:55:26Stevie, this is Sage.

00:55:29Nice to meet you, Sage.

00:55:32I don't drink, Jeff.

00:55:33Tonight you do.

00:55:36I don't want to hear the words don't, won't, or can't.

00:55:47You look familiar. Where are you from?

00:55:49Kansas City. But maybe you've seen me dance somewhere else.

00:55:52I don't think so. How long have you lived here?

00:55:54Two years. I got a college in the city.

00:55:59Wait a minute.

00:56:02We have met before.

00:56:04Yeah, I tried talking to you at this little shithole bar down on 3rd Street.

00:56:08Fuck.

00:56:09Ah, you were a total fucking biatch.

00:56:11I'm sorry? I don't remember.

00:56:14I'm sure you don't.

00:56:16That's probably how you behaved when I was the guy you used to date.

00:56:19I'm sure you don't.

00:56:20That's probably how you behaved when I was the guy who was paying you.

00:56:23Fuck off. I don't need this shit.

00:56:25Hey, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

00:56:28I want to take you home tonight. How much?

00:56:30Uh-uh. What about us?

00:56:31Why not?

00:56:32Oh, shit.

00:56:33Who the fuck do you think you are?

00:56:35I wouldn't touch your dick if you were the last guy on this earth.

00:56:38This asshole's all yours.

00:56:41Five thousand dollars.

00:56:49Fuck.

00:57:20Wow, that was really something.

00:57:24Good.

00:57:26I just gotta get some sleep.

00:57:30You want me to leave?

00:57:31Yeah, that's what I'm paying you for.

00:57:33It's after four. I can't crash here for a couple hours?

00:57:38I just paid you five grand. Get a suite at the Ritz.

00:57:42You really do have a problem.

00:57:45Maybe next week you can stay the night, but then you only get two grand.

00:57:48I wouldn't hold my breath if I were you.

00:57:51Whatever.

00:57:53Every girl's got a bit.

00:57:55Let me tell you something. That five grand is gonna pay for my tuition next semester.

00:58:00Oh.

00:58:01I hope you're a lot better at school.

00:58:19Five hundred bucks? That thing's worth nine grand.

00:58:21In this city, this is worth five hundred bucks. Take it or leave it.

00:58:48Fuck.

00:59:18Fuck.

00:59:42Steve-O.

00:59:44How long you been here?

00:59:45About an hour.

00:59:46Make it three and it ain't pretty.

00:59:49What the hell do you do all day?

00:59:50I was up all night destroying this slam piece.

00:59:52I slept till noon, went to the gym for a couple hours, got horny again, then ordered up a ménage.

00:59:56I technically was a foursome.

00:59:57Jesus, man. I'm worried about you.

00:59:59Why? I never felt better.

01:00:00I mean, feel this shit, dude. It's a fucking pinecone.

01:00:02But you're burning through all your cash.

01:00:03So? It's not like I'm saving for a beach house. I feel liberated.

01:00:07You're too consumed by all of this.

01:00:08It runs in, Steve. It's not a way of life.

01:00:10It's been three months. You've fucked well over fifteen girls. End it.

01:00:13Hey, fuck that.

01:00:14Everything you've ever done is to get laid or make money, so don't tell me it's always.

01:00:17I'm telling you, you're a fucking mess.

01:00:19I mean, what the fuck? Look at you.

01:00:21You quit your job, changed your whole fucking life, and for what?

01:00:24Oh, because you lost Chloe? Fuck that. Who the fuck is she?

01:00:26Who the fuck is she?

01:00:27Yeah.

01:00:28Who the fuck is she?

01:00:29Yeah, who the fuck is she?

01:00:30She was everything, man. She was my whole fucking identity.

01:00:32When it was Steven and Chloe, it was perfection.

01:00:34And now that it's just Steven, it sucks.

01:00:36I'm not taking any responsibility.

01:00:37Hey, hey, hey.

01:00:38Just sit down. I need to talk to you.

01:00:39You know what that feels like?

01:00:41When a girl that beautiful tells you she loves you, it's not like a normal girl saying she loves you.

01:00:46Accountants don't get girls like that, Jack, but I had her.

01:00:51And for whatever reason, she was completely into me.

01:00:54For three years.

01:00:59Steven, I'm sorry.

01:01:00Are you gonna shut up and have a drink or what?

01:01:03We gotta get our buzz on her if we're gonna do some serious hunting. Clancy, get him a double.

01:01:06Steven, slow down. Why don't you take a night off?

01:01:09Hey, fuck that. Bring me a double too.

01:01:15Maybe you'll calm him down.

01:01:16No, pussy'll calm me down.

01:01:18And speaking of pussy, Jack, stop being one.

01:01:40Oh, fuck.

01:01:47Steven, hey.

01:01:50Amelia.

01:01:52Uh, hey.

01:01:54How you doing?

01:01:55I'm, I'm great. I'm great. I'm actually, I'm waiting for a friend who's always late.

01:01:59Do you wanna come and join me?

01:02:03Um...

01:02:05Uh, yeah. Yeah. Sure.

01:02:08I'll have a scotch on the rocks.

01:02:10I'll have a chardonnay. I have a tab. Steven Goodson.

01:02:14Thanks.

01:02:16Wow, God, you look great.

01:02:17I quit my job. Been working around.

01:02:19Wow, good for you.

01:02:24You know, in high school, I always wanted to ask you out, but never had the balls.

01:02:28Really?

01:02:30Wow.

01:02:31Really?

01:02:33Wow. I had no idea.

01:02:35Yeah.

01:02:38So, well, does that mean that you still wanna take me out, or did that expire?

01:02:42I would love to take you out.

01:02:45I'll take you out tomorrow.

01:02:47Well, I can't tomorrow.

01:02:49Um, I'm going away this weekend, but, um, next week?

01:02:53Next week's fine.

01:02:55I'm so sorry. It took me forever to get out of the office.

01:02:58It's okay. Renee, this is Steven. We went to high school together.

01:03:01How sweet. Nice to meet you.

01:03:03Listen, I'm gonna get back to my friends.

01:03:05Very nice to meet you.

01:03:07And, um, I need your number.

01:03:14All right. Great. All right. I'll talk to you soon.

01:03:20Here, honey, take a look at these. These are the best ones.

01:03:23Uh, I like the one on the ocean.

01:03:25You don't think that's too big for a summer house?

01:03:27No, sweetie. I think it's perfect.

01:03:31You always pick the most expensive.

01:03:33Well, that's because they're the best ones.

01:03:35I don't think it's safe for the kids to be so close to the water.

01:03:38Well, let's worry about that when we have some.

01:03:42I have a surprise for you.

01:03:46You do?

01:03:48I do.

01:03:50It's our wedding invitation.

01:03:54Oh, you scared me.

01:03:56Aren't they beautiful?

01:03:57Yeah.

01:03:58I spoke to the calligrapher. They all go out on Monday.

01:04:00This Monday?

01:04:01Mm-hmm.

01:04:06Ooh.

01:04:08Let's go to bed.

01:04:11For some reason, I couldn't stop thinking about her.

01:04:13She made me feel different. She was somebody real.

01:04:16She made me feel different. She was somebody real.

01:04:19I decided I'd put the run on hold and take her out without trying to take advantage of her.

01:04:23I wanted to be respectful. I could be a gentleman.

01:04:26What'd you order? The drink was great.

01:04:29Uh, that was a mind eraser.

01:04:31It's a specialty of the house.

01:04:33Well, I think it's working.

01:04:35I never drink this much.

01:04:38You know, I think it takes a lot of courage to just quit your job without even knowing what your next step is going to be.

01:04:44I really admire that.

01:04:47And, you know, I think you should take as much time as you need to, you know, figure out what it is that you're truly passionate about.

01:04:56That's my plan.

01:05:00Let me get you another.

01:05:03You know, I'm really glad that after all these years, you still wanted to ask me out.

01:05:09Because I kind of feel connected to you.

01:05:15Thanks.

01:05:18Tonight has been really fantastic.

01:05:22Thanks.

01:05:24I don't go out much, so this was fun for me.

01:05:29And, um, this is me.

01:05:31This is you.

01:05:35God, I can't believe how late it got.

01:05:38I have to be up in, like, four hours.

01:05:42Well, we should do this again.

01:05:44Yeah.

01:05:46Well, I... I mean, do you want to come up?

01:05:49Not really going to get enough sleep anyway.

01:05:54Um...

01:05:56Yeah.

01:05:57Sure.

01:05:59I'll come up.

01:06:12Steven, wait.

01:06:21Steven, wait! Stop!

01:06:22I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

01:06:23Just slow down.

01:06:26Might sound kind of lame, but I'm not like that.

01:06:28I know. I know that, okay? I know that.

01:06:31I'm sorry.

01:06:32I gotta go.

01:06:34Well, it is late, but...

01:06:35Well, it's late.

01:06:36I want you to call me.

01:06:37Okay.

01:06:38Okay, seriously.

01:06:39Yes, I'll call you.

01:06:40Okay, call me.

01:06:41Thank you.

01:06:42Goodbye.

01:06:46Well, I guess I couldn't be normal.

01:06:48But who wants to be normal anyway?

01:06:50It's just another word for weak.

01:06:51I'm a fucking sexinator.

01:07:10Hello.

01:07:11Hello.

01:07:12Hello.

01:07:13Hello.

01:07:14Hello.

01:07:15Hello.

01:07:16Hello.

01:07:17Hello.

01:07:18Hello.

01:07:19Hello.

01:07:20Hello.

01:07:21Hello.

01:07:22Hello.

01:07:23Hello.

01:07:24Hello.

01:07:25Hello.

01:07:26Hello.

01:07:27Hello.

01:07:28Hello.

01:07:29Hello.

01:07:30Hello.

01:07:31Hello.

01:07:32Hello.

01:07:33Hello.

01:07:34Hello.

01:07:35Hello.

01:07:36Hello.

01:07:37Hello.

01:07:38Hello.

01:07:40Are you having fun?

01:07:42The good thing about being a non-stop sex machine with a demon at the wheel

01:07:46is that when people see you coming, no one stops you for directions.

01:07:49Amelia was a distant memory,

01:07:51and my life was just committed to fucking young, hot chicks.

01:07:57Hey.

01:07:58Hey, there's somebody at the door.

01:08:02There's somebody at the door.

01:08:05Hey, open the fucking door, Steve.

01:08:07Open up.

01:08:09Come on, Steve.

01:08:10Quit fucking around and open the door.

01:08:16Whoa.

01:08:21What are you guys doing here?

01:08:23We were worried about you.

01:08:25Haven't heard from you in weeks.

01:08:26You don't have a phone.

01:08:27Look at this place.

01:08:28It's a fucking shithole.

01:08:29Oh, um...

01:08:32Guys, this is, uh...

01:08:36Erica.

01:08:38It's nice to meet you.

01:08:40Oh, thanks.

01:08:42I was just leaving.

01:08:46All right.

01:09:00What the fuck is going on?

01:09:02What?

01:09:03What do you mean, what?

01:09:04You live in this shithole.

01:09:06You haven't been to work in four months.

01:09:08You got no money.

01:09:09You're, like, this close to being homeless.

01:09:11Jack.

01:09:15I get pussy every night.

01:09:20All right, you know what?

01:09:21That's enough.

01:09:22This is an intervention, all right?

01:09:24You need fucking therapy, shock treatment.

01:09:27You're like an addict.

01:09:28What are you doing with your life?

01:09:29Thinking about getting a job in landscaping.

01:09:32Get to work outdoors, be physical.

01:09:34Physical?

01:09:35You went to college, for Christ's sake.

01:09:36You majored in accounting.

01:09:38Jack, my rent's 300 bucks a month.

01:09:40It's gonna make enough money to keep doing what I'm doing.

01:09:43And then what?

01:09:44There's no and then what.

01:09:45That's it.

01:09:47What...

01:09:48What the hell are you talking about?

01:09:49That sucks.

01:09:51Jack, I'll make enough cash to go out every night,

01:09:53hit a strip club once a week,

01:09:55buy enough champagne and lap dance

01:09:56to pull a girl out of there.

01:09:57That's your big plan.

01:09:58Hey, fuck big plans, all right?

01:10:00What's your big fucking plan, huh, Jack?

01:10:02Marry some girl for her money,

01:10:03be a slave to her old man,

01:10:04then live ass-lickingly ever after?

01:10:06You know, fuck you, man.

01:10:07You're full of shit.

01:10:08All you do is fucking talk.

01:10:11It's not about me, you demented sociopath.

01:10:16Yes, it is.

01:10:17What other warped fucking scumbag

01:10:18have I been listening to this whole time, huh?

01:10:20Remember that model bitch that never called me back?

01:10:22I was not on my element.

01:10:23She probably lost her fucking cell phone

01:10:25or moved to Milan or some shit.

01:10:27And all those legendary runs you were going on, Jack,

01:10:29when was I for all those, huh?

01:10:30You probably go home every night

01:10:31with your dick in your hands

01:10:32and jerk off next to your ice princess

01:10:33thinking of all the girls I fuck.

01:10:34You can't blame me.

01:10:35If you want, I said go on a run.

01:10:37I didn't say fuck up the rest of your life.

01:10:39Did you call that girl you went to high school with,

01:10:41the teacher?

01:10:42No, I've been busy.

01:10:43Fuck that, we're calling her.

01:10:44What's her number? Right now.

01:10:45Look, Jack, she doesn't want to talk to me.

01:10:46What are you so afraid of?

01:10:47All right, listen to me, both of you!

01:10:50Sit down!

01:10:56You know, back when I was your age, even younger,

01:10:59I had my head shoved up my ass

01:11:00just like the both of you.

01:11:02I was doing things I shouldn't do,

01:11:03hanging out with people you don't want to know.

01:11:05I was chasing my share of tail, believe me,

01:11:07I was feeling pretty good about my manhood.

01:11:10And then...

01:11:13I met this nice girl, real smart,

01:11:16got a degree in this, got a degree in that,

01:11:18and I liked this girl right off the bat.

01:11:20And then I met her.

01:11:22Got a degree in that,

01:11:23and I liked this girl right off the bat.

01:11:25But I'm thinking to myself,

01:11:26she's not going to want to have anything to do with me.

01:11:31So I didn't call.

01:11:33Two years pass by, I see her in a park with another guy.

01:11:36My heart, it breaks right there, I'm a mess.

01:11:38I mean, for Christ's sakes, why didn't I call her?

01:11:40What was I so afraid of?

01:11:42So another year passes.

01:11:44But I've cleaned up my act.

01:11:46I open the bar, I make myself respectable.

01:11:50And then, one day, she comes in.

01:11:56And then I knew.

01:11:58It was going to happen for us.

01:12:01And that was Janine?

01:12:03No.

01:12:04That was Janine's little sister, Mara.

01:12:07But that's how I met Janine.

01:12:08Look, Clancy, that was a...

01:12:10a great story, but I don't really see the point.

01:12:12You friggin' call her!

01:12:14I'm not going to call her.

01:12:15Yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:12:16She doesn't want to hear from me right now.

01:12:17Yes, she does!

01:12:18I'm not going to call her right now.

01:12:19You're going to...

01:12:20Hang on!

01:12:22Hello?

01:12:23Hi.

01:12:25Amelia?

01:12:27Um...

01:12:29It's Steven.

01:12:32Yeah.

01:12:34Good.

01:12:35How are you?

01:12:38Yeah, I know.

01:12:39Um, I was going to call you sooner, but, uh...

01:12:42The prince and his men follow the fairy princess through the dark forest.

01:12:48Only a kiss from the good prince could break the spell

01:12:51and wake her from her deep slumber.

01:12:56When the prince kissed her rosy cheek,

01:12:58the spell was finally broken

01:13:01and the prince and Sleeping Beauty were together at last.

01:13:06And they all lived happily ever after.

01:13:15Hey!

01:13:16Prince Charming.

01:13:18Did your mom say she was going to be running late?

01:13:21Nope.

01:13:22I'm going to go give her a call.

01:13:24Okay, here.

01:13:25Well, you stay here with my friend Steven for a minute.

01:13:27Is that okay?

01:13:28Yeah.

01:13:32So, what's your name?

01:13:33Derek.

01:13:35Well, you did a great job tonight, Derek.

01:13:37Yeah, whatever.

01:13:38But my motherfuckin' friend's been all up in my face and shit.

01:13:41They're having to kiss this skinny-ass bitch.

01:13:43Hey, hey.

01:13:44You shouldn't talk like that.

01:13:45Why the fuck not?

01:13:48Because it's not good for you.

01:13:50Yeah, whatever.

01:13:51You like Teach, huh?

01:13:52Yeah.

01:13:53Yeah, I like Teach.

01:13:55Why, don't you like her, too?

01:13:56Well, I ain't the one tapping that ass.

01:13:58Hey, how old are you?

01:13:59Do you even know what that means?

01:14:00I'm eight and a half, motherfucker.

01:14:02What the fuck do you think?

01:14:04Okay, I talked to your brother.

01:14:06He's going to be here in a half hour.

01:14:07All right.

01:14:16Thanks for being such a sport tonight.

01:14:18I'm totally spaced that the play was this Friday.

01:14:20Don't worry about it.

01:14:21I had fun.

01:14:23You know, I can tell the kids really like you.

01:14:25You're great with them.

01:14:26Oh, I love working with kids.

01:14:28I really feel like I can make a difference.

01:14:31How about you?

01:14:33Do you want kids someday?

01:14:36I mean, I guess I'd be ready.

01:14:38If I met someone I felt I could spend the rest of my life with.

01:14:46You know, I wasn't sure I should call you

01:14:50after I left your place that night,

01:14:53but I'm really happy I did.

01:15:01I've been avoiding people lately.

01:15:06Just, I don't know, with my own head, trying to escape.

01:15:10Yeah, it's scary to feel all alone in the world.

01:15:12Yeah.

01:15:15It's been my way of not dealing.

01:15:19I'm tired of being like that.

01:15:23Well, you don't have to be alone, Steven.

01:15:28I don't want to be alone.

01:15:42Hey.

01:15:58Hey.

01:15:59Jack.

01:16:00Get up. We're going to be late.

01:16:02You know, I see your father all day, every day.

01:16:04I'd like to not have to see him on a Saturday.

01:16:06Well, I promised that we'd have brunch with him.

01:16:09You have to be respectful of my family.

01:16:11You know my father doesn't like to be disappointed.

01:16:14So, get up.

01:16:16I can't.

01:16:19Well, that's too bad, because they're expecting us.

01:16:21That's not what I'm talking about.

01:16:24I gave Steven all this advice and he turned into a monster.

01:16:28Now I can't look at myself without seeing a monster, too.

01:16:34What's that supposed to mean?

01:16:37I'm obsessed with money.

01:16:40I'm sick and you're my meal ticket and that disgusts me.

01:16:49Jack.

01:17:02I love you.

01:17:07And you know that we could have a wonderful life together.

01:17:11So, be careful.

01:17:14Being careful makes me miserable.

01:17:22Steven! Break time.

01:17:33That's a girl.

01:17:35She's good. Real good.

01:17:38That's good.

01:17:39Hey, you two pick up. Come on.

01:17:48Hello, may I help you?

01:17:49Yes. Do you have a reservation under Goodson?

01:17:52All right.

01:17:54Oh, I don't see anything here.

01:17:57Oh, no. Here you are.

01:18:00Right this way.

01:18:05Happy Valentine's Day.

01:18:07Thank you.

01:18:11My God, they're beautiful.

01:18:15I love them.

01:18:18Well, I got something for you, too.

01:18:29I honestly wasn't expecting that.

01:18:31I made it.

01:18:32I made it.

01:18:33That's our first picture that we took together.

01:18:36And then I figured we can fill it with more as we go along.

01:18:42This is great.

01:18:45And I have another surprise for you, too.

01:18:51You've been so patient.

01:18:54So wonderful.

01:18:58I'm ready.

01:19:03You could say something. I thought you'd be happy.

01:19:08I'm happy.

01:19:10Of course I'm happy.

01:19:12Well, I just feel really comfortable with you.

01:19:17Are you all right?

01:19:24I'm great.

01:19:25Well, you have a really weird look on your face.

01:19:28What are you thinking?

01:19:33Steven, are you even listening to me?

01:19:37I'll be right back.

01:19:48Excuse me.

01:19:51We've met before.

01:19:53At my apartment, off the internet.

01:19:55Yeah.

01:19:57I have $200.

01:19:59I need it right now.

01:20:01I'm $400 an hour.

01:20:03And the guy I'm with has me for the whole night.

01:20:05Well, I only have $200.

01:20:07But I only need five minutes.

01:20:09Just let me fuck you, all right? Come on. We can do the bathroom.

01:20:14Five minutes, whether you come or not.

01:20:16Okay.

01:20:31Oh, shit.

01:21:02Shit.

01:21:25Are you sure you're all right? I feel like you've been gone forever.

01:21:29I'm fine. Yeah.

01:21:31What is it? Your stomach?

01:21:33No.

01:21:35Don't worry about it.

01:21:37Well, then let's get out of here.

01:21:40Let's go back and get busy.

01:21:45Wait one second.

01:21:56There's...

01:21:59There's...

01:22:02I have to tell you something.

01:22:03What?

01:22:09I don't even know where to begin.

01:22:12Well, whatever it is, I mean, you can just say it.

01:22:21I have a problem.

01:22:23Okay.

01:22:25You're starting to scare me soon.

01:22:28Okay.

01:22:36Okay, well, I mean, it can't be that big of a deal.

01:22:41All I think about is sleeping with other women.

01:22:46Even when I'm with you.

01:22:47What?

01:22:49What are you saying?

01:22:50I have sex with at least five girls a week.

01:22:53That's insane.

01:22:54I mean, that's...

01:22:55What, do you need help or you want to talk to somebody or something?

01:22:58No, you don't get it.

01:23:02I just fucked a hooker in the bathroom.

01:23:04For $200.

01:23:06What?

01:23:09You're...

01:23:12You're here tonight.

01:23:15I'm sorry.

01:23:24I'm sorry.

01:23:42I just can't be with you anymore.

01:23:55I'm sorry.

01:24:06You know you gotta hold this for me, right?

01:24:08It's part of the job description.

01:24:11Let's see it.

01:24:18With this ring, I thee wed.

01:24:21With this ring, you are dead.

01:24:23Hey, with this ring, I'm a very rich man.

01:24:26All right, shut the fuck up and be happy for me already.

01:24:28Why?

01:24:29I didn't think being happy was part of your big plan.

01:24:31Well, at least pretend.

01:24:32Well, I guess I'm just not as good at that as you are.

01:24:34You're hopeless.

01:24:35You know what, Steve?

01:24:36I'm supposed to be all sad and regretful that I'm selling out.

01:24:38Is that it?

01:24:39Yeah.

01:24:40Hey, I'm a big fucking sellout.

01:24:45Well, I admitted it.

01:24:46In the house of God, I admitted it and I haven't been struck down.

01:24:49I haven't been cursed.

01:24:50Because no one cares, Steve.

01:24:51No one cares that I can't stand her.

01:24:53I never want to have sex with her and that the sound of her voice makes my balls tight.

01:24:57And all of the joy her father brings me, treating me like a fucking failure.

01:25:01And her mother is the most neurotic lunatic of them all.

01:25:05Jack, we're about to begin. Let's go.

01:25:08Okay, thanks. I'll be there in a sec.

01:25:20Fuck you and all your bullshit advice.

01:25:22And fuck me for listening to it.

01:25:24I mean, do you have any idea what I've become?

01:25:26I make myself sick now.

01:25:27A million was the best thing that ever happened to me.

01:25:29I couldn't help myself from ruining it.

01:25:31And now there's this thing that just keeps eating away at me.

01:25:35And I can't take it anymore.

01:25:36And you know what? I'm going to do something about it.

01:25:38Well, good.

01:25:39I'm going to go to Tahiti on a $90,000 a week yacht

01:25:41and start making a million dollars off of it.

01:25:43And you know what?

01:25:44I'm going to do something about it.

01:25:45And you know what?

01:25:46I'm going to do something about it.

01:25:47I'm going to go to Tahiti on a $90,000 a week yacht

01:25:49and start my new life as a ridiculously wealthy man.

01:25:53Fuck you, Jack.

01:25:55Hey, fuck you.

01:25:57Fuck both of you.

01:25:59Jack, come on. Everyone's ready. Now.

01:26:17That's good.

01:26:36The thing inside me never finished me off.

01:26:39It did its best to carve me hollow, but I scraped by.

01:26:43I went to rehab to try to be human again.

01:26:46I wanted my spirit back.

01:26:50I wanted to be good enough to be with somebody real.

01:26:53Free from the poison of the airbrushed and mass-marketed fantasies.

01:26:59Hopefully now I would have the strength to see beauty with my eyes closed.

01:27:03Because I would feel it in my heart.

01:27:06I drank at least 30 cups of coffee a day.

01:27:11I got fired from my job. I didn't care about that.

01:27:15I was an animal.

01:27:21I was a machine.

01:27:25But...

01:27:29I'm ready to...

01:27:32take the first steps towards...

01:27:36sexual sobriety.

01:27:46The thing inside me still lives.

01:27:48That's a fact.

01:27:50Now it's just a matter of having the soul to battle him.

01:27:53Day by day.

01:28:05I know you don't want anything to do with me right now.

01:28:10But we should be together.

01:28:11I want you to give me another chance.

01:28:15You know, there's a reason that I didn't return any of your phone calls.

01:28:19I know. It was horrible, what I did.

01:28:22I don't think you're capable of knowing.

01:28:24That's not true.

01:28:31I'll always feel I broke something I can never fix.

01:28:35I'll always feel like I'm a failure.

01:28:37I'll always feel I broke something I can never fix...

01:28:41by hurting you like that.

01:28:46Well, I guess that's just the price you'll have to pay.

01:28:55Just leave.

01:29:01Amelia, come on.

01:29:02Get out of here, Steven! I'm not kidding!

01:29:08I can't believe her for not wanting to be with me

01:29:10after I defiled her wholesome sense of humanity.

01:29:12Defiled her wholesome what?

01:29:14I don't know what the hell you're talking about.

01:29:16But it sounds like you fucked it up pretty bad with Teach.

01:29:18You're right, I did.

01:29:20Well, you should get your ass back in there

01:29:22and figure out how you can get another piece of that booty.

01:29:24It's not all about booty anymore.

01:29:26Shit, it's always about booty.

01:29:29I'll tell you the record.

01:29:30I'm not going to tell you the record.

01:29:32I'm not going to tell you the record.

01:29:34I'm not going to tell you the record.

01:29:36I'll tell you, Derek, a few months ago

01:29:38I definitely would have agreed with you, but believe me,

01:29:40it couldn't be further from the truth.

01:29:42Teach always says, if someone says they're sorry,

01:29:45you accept their apology and give them another chance.

01:29:49I didn't actually say I'm sorry.

01:29:51You never said you were sorry!

01:29:53What kind of way is that to win back your woman?

01:29:55You better go back in there and tell her you're sorry.

01:29:57And after that, you better pray

01:30:00she's going to fucking trust you again.

01:30:02You're eight and a half years old, Derek.

01:30:04You shouldn't keep talking like that.

01:30:05Who got you sent to the principal's office in the first place?

01:30:08I'm nine now, bitch.

01:30:19I just want to say I'm sorry.

01:30:21What?

01:30:26I never said the words, I'm sorry.

01:30:31Okay, fine.

01:30:33You said them.

01:30:35Now go.

01:30:37Well, Derek told me that if I said I'm sorry,

01:30:39you'd have to accept my apology and give me a second chance.

01:30:43Aren't those your school rules?

01:30:46So now you're taking advice from an eight and a half year old

01:30:49who spends most of his free time in detention

01:30:52because he can't control himself from cursing.

01:30:56Maybe he'll get some help and grow out of it.

01:30:59And he's nine.

01:31:01He's a little boy from a broken home

01:31:05who's angry and starved for attention.

01:31:09You're a grown man who had someone who really cared about you.

01:31:13And you just couldn't keep it in your pants.

01:31:19It's a bad comparison.

01:31:21Look, I'm not asking you to forget everything that happened.

01:31:24I'm just begging you to trust me enough to open your door a tiny bit.

01:31:29And it wouldn't be just you trusting me.

01:31:30I'd also be trusting myself because I'd rather die than hurt you again.

01:31:36I just don't want to live in a world where there's not even a hope

01:31:39for a chance of a future between us.

01:31:41Why should there be?

01:31:43Because I know who I am when I'm with you.

01:31:47And that's the person I want to be.

01:31:50And I know who you are when you're with me.

01:31:52And that's the person I want to be with.

01:31:56You really think you know all that?

01:32:01I think that's the only thing I know for sure.

01:32:15You know, the best thing about seeing the world through the eyes of a nine-year-old

01:32:20is that anything seems possible.

01:32:27And that happy endings are just like right around the corner.

01:32:34Too bad we all have to grow up someday, huh?

01:32:37Yeah, but when you're a kid, you should believe in the perfect ending

01:32:40where everything's glassy and neat.

01:32:42But when you're a grown-up, you can still have your happy ending too.

01:32:45It just happens to be a version where there's always some pain along the way

01:32:49and some easy.

01:32:53And you have to be ready and willing to earn it.

01:33:11Take a seat.

01:33:13I, um... I have to finish grading this homework.

01:33:43I love you.

01:34:13I love you too.

01:34:43I love you too.

01:35:13No matter the price, she wants to get laid

01:35:18La, la, la, la, la, la

01:35:21La, la, la, la, la, la

01:35:23La, la, la, la, la, la

01:35:27He and Ben said

01:35:32That she will play along

01:35:36It's so reasonable

01:35:41How he leads her on

01:35:45If he can for the thrill

01:35:49Take her now against all her will

01:35:53He's so vain to think how

01:35:57By whining and dining that she will put out

01:36:02All you men that think you know now

01:36:06How to please a woman, well, I'll tell you right now

01:36:11Diamonds, flowers, it's not what you pay

01:36:15No matter the price, she wants to get laid

01:36:20La, la, la, la, la, la

01:36:23La, la, la, la, la, la

01:36:25La, la, la, la, la, la

01:36:29She works fast, the job's done

01:36:33He's confused, did she ever come?

01:36:37She pretends it's all right

01:36:41She's stroking his ego, now sleep through the night

01:36:46All you men that think you know now

01:36:49How to please a woman, well, I'll tell you right now

01:36:54Diamonds, flowers, it's not what you pay

01:36:58No matter the price, she wants to get laid

01:37:03La, la, la, la, la, la

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