Frasier Season 2 Episode 19 Someone To Watch Over Me
Frasier Season 2 Episode 19 Someone To Watch Over Me
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00:00Brian let me assure you no one is a born scatterbrain. Simply have to develop your
00:06powers of concentration. On a trip to the Amazon I was able to observe the hunters
00:11of the primitive Shipibo tribe. Nothing more than a crude blowgun they can bring
00:18down small monkeys from the forest canopy high above their heads. How? Focus
00:23and mental discipline. And that's what we have to work on Brian. Focus on one
00:30thing and not allow ourselves to be distracted by a single... We've been
00:34nominated for a CV!
00:37Of course we should never become so single-minded that we don't allow
00:41ourselves to be spontaneous. We'll be back right after this.
00:46Oh my god I have to lose five pounds in two weeks. That'll be enough of that. Ross, I bought this for you this morning. I was hoping that I
01:03wouldn't have to say this was just for being you. Oh, thanks Frazier. This is so
01:10great. You know last year I was so obsessed with winning that I didn't even
01:15enjoy being nominated. But this year I don't care if we win or lose. I'm just
01:19gonna buy myself a beautiful dress and have my hair done. And I'm gonna stretch
01:24out in the back of the limo with my date. I wonder why you bothered having your
01:28hair done. Hey Doc! Congratulations! Hey Ross! Oh, okay. Well I understand congratulations were in order for you as well
01:41Bulldog. What is this? Four nominations? Three wins? Yes. I've been a symbol of
01:46broadcasting excellence in Seattle since 1991.
01:57See ya, Doc. 30 seconds. Thank you, Ross. Whom do we have? On line one we have a shoplifter
02:05from Bainbridge and then line two is your number one fan. Oh, Kari? Mm-hmm, for the
02:11fourth time this week. Why don't you let me get rid of her all she ever does is
02:15gush and tell you how wonderful you are. And this hurts me how?
02:23Hello, Seattle. We're back. Got time for just one more call. So, Ross, who do we
02:30have on the line? Oh, please.
02:35Hello, you're on with Frasier Crane. Hi, Dr. Crane. It's me, Kari. Nervous as usual.
02:42Anyway, I hope you're not getting sick of me. Oh. I just think you're wonderful. Oh.
02:48Thank you for always talking to me. Well, thank you for being so sweet. Well, thank
02:54you for giving such good advice. Well, thank you. Oh, sorry. If that's all. That was a
03:02beautiful rose you bought this morning. Yes, I bought it to give to... Excuse me.
03:09Don't be surprised. I saw you at the florist. You weren't doing your regular
03:14routine. My regular routine? Cafe Nervosa. You go there every morning, except today.
03:21I can tell I'm boring you now. Bye. Well, goodbye, Kari. Hmm. Well, it's all our time for today,
03:31Seattle. Goodbye and good listening. That was pretty weird. Now she's following you.
03:39I don't think it's so weird. She's hardly following me. Maybe she hangs out at Cafe
03:44Nervosa, too, and the florist is right next door. Gotta be careful out there. There's a
03:49lot of creeps. Oh, Roger, I hate that word, creep. I've met a lot of odd people in this
03:54business. I've never referred to any of them as a creep. Hey, Roger, will you stop wearing
03:59those corduroys? I can't see your panty line.
04:04Well, some people do send me groping for synonyms.
04:20Ah, what are you up to? I just met your father for his tuxedo. Oh, Frazier, that reminds me.
04:26I'm afraid Maris won't be able to make your C.B. Awards tomorrow night. Well, call me
04:31surprised. Any particular reason? Yes. This time it's a good one. She's very upset about
04:39her manicurist. The woman's been doing Maris' nails for years now, and sadly she was just
04:48taken critically ill. Oh, dear. How bad is she? She'll be fine when she finds another
04:53manicurist. Until then, she's curtailing all public appearances. Yes, well, I'm sorry.
05:02It's not like I'm nominated for a C.B. every year. Oh, wait a minute. Yes, it is. Well,
05:10as some illustrious person once said, popularity is the hallmark of mediocrity. You just made
05:16that up, didn't you? Yes, but I stand by it. Will you be joining us for dinner tonight,
05:23Dr. Crane? No. Frazier and I are going to the opera. We're seeing Der Fliegende Hollander.
05:30Oh, don't forget, tickets are in your briefcase. Oh, yes, thanks, sir. I can hear that first
05:36aria already. Oh, Niles, you'll start singing it, then I'll start singing it, and I won't
05:43be able to get it out of my head. What is this? Dear Dr. Crane, a little bit of me to
05:54wrap around your neck. Your number one fan, Kari. Oh, how sweet. You found it. You're
06:00a scout. Yes, but when did she find the time to put it in my briefcase? I haven't had a
06:05lot of my hand all day, except when I was in the barber chair. Oh, I didn't give her
06:09more than 30 seconds. So you're saying this woman followed you into the barber shop and
06:20slipped a scarf into your briefcase? Well, she's a very devoted fan. She has the handwriting
06:24of a sociopath. Oh, she does not. Big Loops. That's exactly how Scotland Yard caught the
06:33butcher of Brighton. He used Big Loops, a clear sign of anger, and he crossed his T's
06:39in a downward stroke, indicating aggression. Of course, he also kept a demitasse salsa
06:46full of eyelids on his night team. Anybody here besides me think we should put a two-way
06:55lock on her door? Well, if you ask me, it's probably nothing, but there are some weirdos
07:03out there, so just keep your eyes open. Oh, Dad, she's not a weirdo. She's just a woman who finds
07:07me utterly fascinating. And the distinction would be? In any case, I do think that her invading my
07:16space is inappropriate. I hardly think we should start barricading the door. Let's review. She
07:22started with calls to the station, then moved on to spying on you. Now she's been in your briefcase?
07:27It's the classic progression of the predator stalking its prey in ever-narrowing circles,
07:33or loops. That's for you, Daphne. I can't believe it. Oh, Niles, you make me sound like a goat
07:40staked out in a clearing. No one is hunting me down. No one is closing in on me. Oh, well,
07:50look, these must be from the station. Oh, your number one fan, Connie. Your time has come. You
08:01are finally going to get what you deserve. The loop titans. Stop it, Niles. She's probably just
08:09referring to the fact that it's time I win this award. Try as you will, you are not going to turn
08:14me into some sort of a nervous wreck. It's just not going to happen. I don't understand it,
08:32Doc. I'm a successful guy. I have my own car dealership, but still I'm depressed. You've
08:40probably heard of me, Madman Martinez. Well, what seems to be the source of your depression,
08:46Madman? I guess it's just that business is down. I don't know why I slashed prices this week. Right
08:55now I got an 88 Olds Cutlass on the lot in rare turquoise metallic, cord of a roof, leather,
09:02factory air. Madman. And that's nothing compared to the six brand new Supers I got in. They're
09:09a 20% discount to all your listeners. People say to me, Madman, you're crazy. But I say,
09:13hey, I deal in volume. Fortunately, so do I. Well, that's about all the time we have today,
09:20folks. Stay tuned for Bob Bulldog Briscoe after these paid commercial messages. Ross,
09:32what is the matter with you? You're supposed to be screening these calls. Just douse me in
09:37gasoline and toss me a match. I was hoping a stern warning would do the trick. Talking about
09:44this. Three hours until the limo picks me up for the Seabees and my nose erupts like Krakatoa.
09:52It's barely noticeable. From where? The space shuttle? Is this vintage Ross or what? I finally
10:06lose five pounds and I gain three of it back on my nose. Ross, listen, I'm sure there was enough
10:13foundation and some contouring, maybe a little shadowing. Have you considered wearing a beekeeper's
10:22mask? Do I make fun of that astrodome you call a forehead? Gee, Ross, it's been sort of a tough
10:39week for me, too, you know. Kari's taking to putting notes in my briefcase. She's even been
10:44to my apartment. Frazier, you've got to do something. Don't you remember Leo, the happy
10:50chef? He had an obsessed fan, too. It started out innocently, just like yours, and she ended up
10:56breaking into his house. I understand she bent his whisk and scratched all his Teflon. Make fun
11:04all you want, but she made his life miserable and she didn't quit until he hired himself a bodyguard.
11:09Do you want me to find out who he is? No, no, no. I have a hard time believing that Kari poses a real
11:14threat. I mean, she doesn't even have the nerve to come up and look at me face to face. Lord knows
11:18she's had the opportunity. Well, suit yourself. If you ask me, the woman is acting very weird.
11:25Is he good for your nose? No, I finally found a bag to match my shoes. Ross, you're dripping all
11:37over the console. Oh my goodness. Kari? Again? How did she get in your jacket? I have no idea.
11:47I'm very disappointed in you, Dr. Crane. You didn't wear the scarf I needed you, even though
11:53it was very cold. The last man who disappointed me that way is in his grave. Yes, I'll be at the
12:05awards tonight and I'll be looking for you, your number one fan, Kari. Oh, great. I'm sitting at
12:12your table with a bullseye on my nose. Now, now, Dr. Crane, you've really got to try to relax. Oh,
12:28you're right, Daphne. After all, what do I have to be nervous about? I'm going to go for a major
12:33award. If I lose, I'll be devastated. If I win, then the madwoman has been stalking me. We're
12:38gonna have a clear shot when I accept. Oh, don't worry about it. So that's what you hired the
12:45bodyguard for? I still don't see why. Most likely nothing's gonna happen, and even if it does, I was
12:51a cop for 30 years. This whole thing's a waste of money. There's a big difference between a policeman
12:57and a skilled bodyguard. These people are trained the size of a crowd, plan escape routes, even get
13:02shot if necessary. Hey, I know how to take a bullet. Oh yes, that's just what your personality needs,
13:07another bullet. It must be him. Who is it, please? Lizzie Borden, I want you to autograph my hatchet.
13:27It's not very funny. Everyone ready to go? No, we're still waiting for his rent-a-goon.
13:34Apparently he's stuck in traffic. Or else your admirer ran into him first, and he's stuffed in some janitor's
13:42closet, his purple bloated tongue protruding above his freshly garreted neck. Is that champagne?
13:47Oh, you're a fountain of comfort this evening. Oh, I'm just teasing. You must know, I'm a little jealous. I
13:57told Maris about your troubles. All she does is sulk and talk about bodyguards. Why don't we need
14:04one? Aren't we important enough to be stalked? I have no idea what to say to the poor woman. Tell
14:12her to just go on being herself, and her day'll come. Must be my muscle. Oh, dear God, it's a woman.
14:27Where's my bodyguard when I need him? Hello, it's Cindy Carruthers from the Unified Protection Agency.
14:34Your bodyguard's named Cindy? What's the matter, they're all out of Tiffany's? I was expecting
14:44someone big and wide, like a Dominic, a Rocco, a Ruth even. Hello, I'm so glad to see you. Thank
14:55you, Dr. Crane, but you just made a fatal mistake. Oh, my God, it is Corrie. No, I mean you should
15:03have called the agency and asked for a description before you let me in. Hi, Tina, bring the car
15:09around to the service entrance. Tina? I guess Candy was busy. First rule for tonight is trust no one
15:19you don't know. Oh, let me write that down. I suppose you're right, I just start to feel silly
15:27when I act paranoid. Don't, paranoid is good. I was paranoid. Who are these people? This is my brother,
15:40Dr. Niles Crane, my father Martin, and his home care specialist, Daphne Moon. Oh, goodness, you've
15:47seen quite a bit of mayhem in your day, haven't you? Excuse me? Well, you see, I can sense these
15:53things. I'm a bit psychic. Oh, wait, I'm getting a flush now. Did you have a grandfather with a
16:02steel plate in his head? This lunatic has been calling you any particular accent? No, no. You
16:14have a security system in this place? We don't need a security system. We've got Eddie here. Hello,
16:21Eddie. Don't let him fool you. You laid a hand on me, you'd have a bite in your butt the size of a
16:32tennis ball. And Eddie would go for your ankles. My, look at the time. Shouldn't we be going? You better
16:44let me secure the elevator. Wait here and don't open the door for anyone. Ah, by the way, Dr. Crane,
16:51I'll need to know your blood type, location of the nearest trauma center, and a list of any family
16:56members who'd be willing to donate organs. Just so you know, Frasier, I have unusually small kidneys.
17:04Hello, Crane residence. I think it's her. Call Cindy. Put her on speaker. Hello? Hi, I know you're in a
17:24hurry, but I just wanted to let you know I'd be wearing a bright red dress tonight. Corrie? But
17:30don't worry, you won't have to find me. I'll find you. Bye. Corrie, wait. Oh, don't let it bother
17:45yourself. Come on, let's go. Quite frankly, I find it hard to imagine a woman with such a sweet little
17:53voice being dangerous. Does the name Squeaky Frome mean anything to you? All right, I'm seeing a lot of red
18:12dresses here, so let's go over some ground rules. Don't go anywhere alone. If you have to go to the
18:18men's room, go with a buddy and keep your back to the wall at all times. It's gonna take some
18:23marksmanship right there. Don't move, but I think I see her. Red dress, standing by the bar. She's
18:31staring at every man who comes in here, but she's hiding her face behind a program. Oh, that is my
18:39producer, Roz. She's harmless. She just has a pimple on her nose. Looks like some kind of biblical
18:45plague. Roz, Roz, over here. Don't give me that. You look beautiful. Come join us here. Hi, I'm Cindy
18:55Carruthers. Hi. Hi, guys. Roz. Stop that. Roz, listen, you look terrific. You've done a wonderful little job
19:07with your problem there. It's perfectly disappeared. Yeah. Well, Roz, won't you guide my sleigh tonight?
19:20And who's this lovely lady? Cindy Carruthers. Yeah, be careful. She has a concealed weapon.
19:27Makes two of us. He's not kidding. She's his bodyguard. Hey, how'd you like to check out a
19:35body worth guarding? If I moved my thumb a quarter of an inch, I could kill you.
19:43Whoa, I've never been so turned on in my life. Okay, let me go. So, can I call you?
19:57Jeez. You know, I wish this woman would just make her move. I hate this looking over my shoulder
20:03thinking it could be anyone. At least you know she's wearing a red dress. Maybe. You mean maybe?
20:10Well, I'm no professional bodyguard, but if I was some looney tune looking to whack a guy, you know,
20:17maybe I just wouldn't tell the truth about what I was wearing. No offense to your father,
20:22but I think you should stick to looking for a woman in a red dress. Here we are. Good as new.
20:29Well, should we all head up to the ballroom? All right. Help me.
20:41Now, listen, hear me out on this. Didn't it seem curious to you that Cindy was so quick to dismiss
20:47Dad's theory? Cindy, who is not wearing a red dress? Frasier, you can't think that she's what
20:54she couldn't. But how about you? Think about it. She was conveniently out of the apartment at
21:01precisely the moment the stalker phoned. So she was. And we know she has a cellular phone. That's
21:08how she called for the cops. But if it is Cindy, why hasn't she made her move? Maybe she's waiting
21:14to get you alone. Too many red dresses in there. We'll take our own elevator.
21:24Oh, well. Don't be nervous. Oh, I'm not nervous.
21:35Just a little chilly. It's a cold night. Should have worn a scarf.
21:42Yes, I suppose I should. Believe me, I meant to honest. Where is that elevator?
21:49You know, I asked for this assignment. Truth is, I'm quite a fan of yours.
21:58But I guess you figured that out already. Oh, my God. What? There. Where? There, behind the bar.
22:07Oh, Frasier Crane. I've been waiting for this moment for a long time. I'm your number one fan.
22:27Ross, find Cindy. Help me, please. Get him off me. Frasier, are you insane? This is Mrs. Littlejohn,
22:34the head of the nomination committee. Cornelia Littlejohn? This is a small world. I know your
22:40brother, Aubrey. Oh, my gosh. Oh, I'm so sorry, Mrs. Littlejohn. You see, it's just that I've
22:48been stalked by this woman named Kari. And when you said that you've been waiting for me. To get
22:54an autograph for my niece. Oh, well, who's got a pen? You know. Let's hope we win this year,
23:03because we're not getting nominated next year. Ross, are you doing something different with your
23:07hair? What happened? Why did you run away from me? I'll tell you what happened. Paranoia has
23:15turned me into a crazy person. First, I thought you were the stalker. Then I thought she was the
23:20stalker. You know, I've had enough of this. I'm going to confront this thing face to face.
23:25Everyone, I will be in the lobby. Now, tell her, Frazier, just calm down. Please. I will be in
23:32the lobby. You're Kari, aren't you? How did you know? You made a scarf just like that for Frazier.
23:54He's my son. I think there's been a big misunderstanding. I'm just a fan. I never
24:02meant to frighten him. Well, what about that note about the last guy who didn't wear the scarf
24:07ended up in his grave? Oh, that meant my husband, Walter. He caught pneumonia.
24:14I won't bother your son anymore. Could you just tell him what happened? Yeah, I'll be glad to
24:21explain. And if I'm lucky, he won't understand and I'll have to explain all over again.
24:28I'm sure he'll understand. That's the one thing about your son, Mr. Crane.
24:33He's so smart and level-headed. What's she been smoking?
24:40Well, I'm here, you demented heartbeat.
24:55Come and get me, Kari.
24:59Kari?
25:19All right, I know you're down here. Come on out and face me.
25:21Not so brave anymore, huh? You think you're tough, but you're only tough as long as you're
25:33hiding in the shadows. You want to see who's really tough? You just come on out here.
25:52When I said tough, I was speaking clearly in a rhetorical sense.
26:04Would any of you happen to have the time?
26:11Would any of you like the time?
26:21Hey, baby, I hear the blues are calling tossed salads and scrambled eggs. Mercy.
26:34And maybe I seem a bit confused. Yeah, maybe. But I got you pegged.
26:43But I don't know what to do with those tossed salads and scrambled eggs.
26:51They're calling again.
26:55Scrambled eggs all over my face. What is a boy to do?
27:03Good night!