Frasier Season 2 Episode 10 Burying A Grudge
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TVTranscript
00:00where have you been we're on in two minutes forgive me but i was busy preparing your schedule
00:15for tomorrow you've got lunch with the station manager you're recording a psa at three o'clock
00:21and don't forget to send flowers to your sister-in-law in the hospital oh yes maris's facelift
00:27really i didn't know she needed one oh she doesn't actually nothing wrong with
00:33marissa wouldn't be cured by a little sun some exercise and a personality
00:42hello oh just extra copies of your schedule why are you running down to the xerox room for extra
00:48copies of my schedule wouldn't have anything to do with that new intern would it what's his name
00:54eli ross he's probably all of 19 that's legal well cuckoo cuckoo mrs robinson
01:06crazier the guy is so gorgeous you just want to bite him all over haven't you seen him
01:13no i've been eating out lately not seriously thinking of dating him are you
01:19why is it all right for older men to date younger women but it's not okay for older
01:24women to date younger men don't make the rules ross i just enjoy them
01:36hello seattle this is dr frazier crane kacl 780 i'll be with you for the next three hours so let's
01:43get straight to it ross who's our first caller online when we have linda she's calling from her
01:48car phone hello linda i'm listening oh dr crane my husband and i are right in the middle of a fight
01:57you see we're on our way to the antique mart we're obviously lost but he refuses to stop
02:03and ask for directions yes well linda this is a common source of friction among couples
02:11some men feel the need to be in control they see asking for help as a sign of weakness
02:17oh everybody knows that look the reason i called was to ask how the hell do we get to the antique
02:24mart from cherokee and 14th street i don't need any directions i know where i am we're lost
02:32walter face it we're lost well this isn't normally the kind of advice i give but let me see i've
02:40i've lived in seattle most of my life from cherokee and 14th you would want to
02:46uh dr crane i have a map right here oh no thanks ross i don't need any help
02:55addy put that down it's disgusting why do animals always drag these things into the house
03:02what is it a rat no it's a stupid doll found it in the park and he carries it everywhere
03:12he never did this kind of stuff before you had him fixed
03:18hello fraser thought you'd be at the hospital with maris uh i'm on my way down there now
03:24poor maris she's so worried she hasn't had much hospital experience except the usual childhood
03:29things you know tonsils adenoids force feeding
03:37what's wrong with mrs crane oh it's nothing serious cosmetic surgery her chin her lips
03:45her cheeks eyelids maybe it'd be faster if you just told us why she's leaving alone
03:52you know if you want my opinion this is just vanity no it's not vanity dad it's insecurity
04:00it's easy to understand how women can fall victim to our culture's worship at the altar of youth and
04:06beauty precisely women over 40 can't help but feel unattractive if they don't have perfect hair
04:13porcelain skin limpid eyes pouting lips voluptuous contours of a goddess
04:38i'm sorry i've forgotten what my point was
04:43oh i know just what you mean dr crane i fell victim to that pressure myself once
04:49i had them all removed where just south of manchester
04:57i meant where on your body so did i
05:00so what time is the surgery tomorrow first thing in the morning which is why i'm here
05:15i know i'm being silly and and i'm sure everything's going to be fine but i was
05:18wondering if i might have your moral support down at the hospital yeah sure no problem thank you
05:24and well i said better be off hey niles not that it's any of my business but uh
05:32how much is this whole thing setting you back somewhere in the neighborhood of 25 000
05:38jeez for an extra five grand you can get a whole new wife from the philippines
05:54dr nicholson room 502 please oh dr crane dr sternstein excuse me for a moment your wife is
06:04still in recovery but everything went splendidly so you can see her in a few minutes thank you
06:10doctor all right mrs paddison did you hear that frasier he said everything went fine
06:19he's an incredible plastic surgeon did you see that woman
06:23whoever mr paddison is he's a very lucky man maybe that was mr paddison
06:35guess whose room i passed by on the way down the hall arty walsh
06:42dad's old partner it's apparently sent for some tests last week and the
06:48results weren't very good oh no i always liked him yeah i still remember him inviting us to his
06:56house for weenie roast when we were kids i'm sure he remembers you too asking for a salad and he
07:02swallows you think dad knows he's here oh i doubt it i think he wants to know probably not i haven't
07:16spoken in years i don't suppose you got arty to tell you what their big fight was all about
07:22no it's just as tight-lipped as dad is although with a little arm twisting i did get him to admit
07:27it was all dad's fault hey you guys should really try the cafeteria here they got a new chef he's
07:36from yemen so many of the great ones are
07:43dad you know who's in the hospital here arty walsh he's not at all well yeah one of the guys
07:51told me they may have to scoop out half his intestines here taste this meatloaf it's got
07:56just the right amount of chewiness no thank you uh you're gonna go see him well can't think of
08:04any good reason why i should because he was your best friend and now he's sick hey he never came to
08:09see me when i took that bullet when i was lying there with stuff flowing in and out of tubes and
08:15drains from every bodily opening at least taste this gravy dad we are talking about a few minutes
08:23out of your life just just long enough to sit there and have a little chat with a very sick
08:28man i don't see why that's so impossible for you now come on believe me you'll be glad you did
08:33hey listen sonny boy that sanctimonious tone may wow him on the radio but it doesn't cut any ice
08:40with me when i say no that's just what i mean i'm not sitting and chatting with arty walsh
08:48already thought as much why what did he say said he wouldn't have the guts to go see him
08:54he said that yeah and he's snickering a little fuck you well i got news for him i got the guts
09:01i got twice the guts he has and after his surgery tomorrow i'll have four times the gut
09:14arty it's me again
09:19martin arty the minute he heard you were in here he insisted on rushing right over didn't you dad
09:28yeah well
09:35said you were in pretty rocky shape
09:39well they've been saying a lot of things
09:49well uh marty how's it been going okay good small steps
09:58uh sorry you laid up thanks it's nice of you to come by
10:07oh i guess somebody had to be the big man yeah what what's that supposed to mean i think you
10:15know what that means no why don't you tell me what it means it means i'm being a lot bigger
10:20than you were when i was in here you mean when you had that lousy bullet in your hip
10:24hey that lousy bullet hurt pal not enough oh we don't want to talk well it's too bad you never
10:31took a bullet it might have improved you just be glad you didn't take it in the butt it could
10:36have caused brain damage you always want the last word don't you not with you i don't want
10:41any words well that's too bad because i got a couple of real choice ones dad
10:46next time they'll stay longer
11:07stop staring at me like that i didn't touch your damn doll
11:17look even if i didn't know i i did it for your own good
11:25you're becoming the joke of the park even the poodles were laughing at you
11:36oh all right
11:37is there
11:45gotta get that dog a g.i. joe
11:52yes yes maris i'm sure no no you can't gain weight from a glucose iv
11:59oh
12:04no no my little worry wart there's no such thing as a nutra-sweet drip
12:14just just try and close your eyes and go to sleep good night puppy toes
12:22is everything okay with your wife actually no
12:26she can't get along with any of her nurses honestly i'm at a loss to understand our
12:31reputable hospital can hire nothing but troublemakers yes the little sisters
12:36of mercy have always had that reputation
12:45dad didn't get a chance to ask you how did your reunion with arty go lousy
12:51if you don't mind my asking what started this bad blood between the two of you
12:56he spread a rumor about me through the department
13:01about what none of your business oh come on no i don't want to talk about it subject closed
13:08closed
13:15must have been pretty bad oh yeah must have been on the take
13:22more likely drugs drugs yes drugs or sex could be sex usually all three
13:29all right it was worse than any of that
13:34he told people i cried at brian's song
13:46dear god you always think that's the kind of thing that
13:50happens to other people's fathers not your own
13:52well i wasn't crying me and arty was sitting at duke's watching the movie and
14:00i got some pretzel salt in my eye arty thought it was the funniest thing in the world next thing
14:06i'm always telling everybody then i become the joke of the department
14:10how the cops left kleenex on my desk they call me boo-hoo crane
14:16well i suppose i can understand your being upset with him but what's he so cheesed off with you for
14:29well i i guess i'd let something slip about the size of his wife's behind
14:38beg your pardon she's got this gigantic rear end i mean it's enormous
14:43looks like she's shoplifting throw pillows
14:56and you felt compelled to share that with her for 20 years i tried not to and then i guess
15:03one day i let my guard down we'll both come into the station house and he says hi and i
15:09says hi and he says how's the wife and i said at least she doesn't have an ass the size of albuquerque
15:21and that's it a 20-year relationship down the drain because of a little name calling
15:26oh there's more to it than that i mean arty always had to have the last word always
15:34he couldn't leave well enough alone
15:40couldn't let sleeping dogs lie
15:47you think it was all over and then he'd start saying something again
15:53look can we drop this party obviously still has an attitude and i got better things to do
15:59than sit around a hospital room taking abuse oh god i'm due back with maris
16:08oh if uh if anyone needs me i'll be sleeping at the hospital tonight
16:12why uh maris's doctor feels it's more soothing for the patient to duplicate the home environment
16:19as closely as possible so i slipped a pearl handled revolver under her pillow and got
16:23myself a room across the hall
16:37i think we'd better say a little prayer for the night nurse
16:42you know it's such a shame your father and his friend just can't let bygones be bygones
16:47especially at a time like this i don't know what else to do he's just so damn stubborn
16:52oh maybe if i had a go at it you know in the past year and a half i've come to have a pretty
16:58good understanding of how the crane mind works when it works
17:06mr crane about your partner i don't want to talk about it anymore no no i just wanted to tell you
17:14i'm on your side after the way he treated you i said good riddance to bad rubbish damn right
17:21that's hard to see how you could have had any good times together well there weren't many
17:27well occasionally we'd go fishing together that doesn't sound like much fun to me well not the
17:32way i did it but arty got it into his head he was going to teach me even when i bought this
17:38beat-up old boat he always said after we retired we'd get more use out of it yeah well it seems
17:47awfully pushy of him to foist his interests on you oh it wasn't so bad
17:53i remember one time i bust my hump reeling in what turned out to be someone's old
17:58bedroom slipper you know what arty did just unhooked it and threw it right on the barbecue
18:07well i guess maybe it wasn't such a bad guy after all
18:10you know maybe you're right i listen to myself talk and i sound like a big fool
18:23thanks daphne you really opened my eyes i thought i might yeah i'm gonna march right
18:30down to that hospital buy a big stuffed animal and then throw my arms around him
18:36and never ever let him go
18:43you really are a hateful old sod aren't you
18:48come on arty time for your walk
18:53hello yes it is
18:57oh i i see yes well i guess it isn't really a shock considering
19:06yes i'm sure they did everything they could yes
19:12thank you
19:16what was that
19:19we can talk about it later dad
19:20was everything okay why do you ask
19:25well i don't know i hear you say i'm sorry and stuff like i'm sure you did everything you could
19:30and it's natural to be concerned i thought that call was about arty didn't you no yes you did
19:38so what have i did well it just proves my point you still care about it all right suppose i do
19:43care about it suppose i do feel bad about this whole thing i'm sure you care about it
19:48suppose i do feel bad about this stupid fight and won it over what the hell can i do
19:54well it's up to you but if you'd like i could drive you down to the hospital
20:02i don't need you to lead me and drive myself
20:06no you can't why not that was your mechanic your transmission's dead
20:18uh
20:33arty
20:35oh geez oh now look you guys got off in the wrong foot all right frazier i'll handle this
20:46arty
20:49you
20:52will you turn the tv off i'll turn it down
21:00listen arty i'm uh
21:04i'm sorry about some of those things i said earlier okay maybe all of them
21:11i guess i was still a little steamed that you never came to see me in the hospital
21:16i didn't come by because well i just didn't think you'd want to see me of course i wanted to see
21:23you that's what my wife said oh yeah loretta
21:35so
21:43anyway it's nice of you to come by and i know it's not easy especially for someone as stubborn
21:49as you are me stubborn hey listen pal i'm not the one who always has to have the last
21:55word
21:59now you're right arty i am stubborn and it wasn't easy thanks martin
22:09listen uh arty and i have a couple of things to talk about so you know if you uh
22:15you'll just wait outside it'd be a lot easier no problem anything i could say right now would
22:19just be irrelevant one thing you learn as a therapist is once things are working well
22:24between people that anything else you can say would just be
22:35so what's a rotten old cop like you doing in a joint like this believe me it wasn't my idea
22:41this is not how i expected things to end what are you talking about and you're gonna be out on the
22:46street raising hell before you know it i don't know my the doctors aren't exactly tossing their
22:52hats up in the air with this one hey my sons are doctors they don't know nothing now listen you
22:59gotta get yourself out of here okay because we got a lot of lost time to make up for
23:07can you still let that stupid boat oh yeah i hung on to it yeah we'll save that damn thing yet
23:15hey arty remember the time you barbecued the bedroom slipper
23:22i kept telling you stuff always tastes better when you catch it yourself
23:34frasier what are you doing here oh i finally got arty walsh and dad talking again
23:40of course i did have to resort to cheap manipulative pseudo-psychology always go to your
23:47strengths what about you looks like you bought out the entire gift shop maris should be pleased
23:58oh this isn't for maris it's for her nurses
24:04they're having a meeting right now to discuss her care and from what people tell me
24:08a hospital strike can be ugly
24:13visiting hours are over gentlemen oh thank you i'll go round up there excuse me
24:21do you work on my wife's floor mrs maris crane yes i do i'd like you to have these chocolates
24:31i'm on the night shift and this lovely watch
24:52why you get another phone call about your dad's transmission
24:56your dad told me about that well all i was doing was yeah yeah i knew what you were doing
25:04thanks kid see you soon yeah
25:12okay now we got a deal all right as soon as you get sprung from this joint you're gonna give me
25:18some serious fishing lessons if i get out when you get out you can't have the last word on this one
25:26okay see you marty see you all right bye bye take care
25:39take care stay loose
25:42see you arnie
26:12see you marty
26:36hey baby i hear the blues are calling for salads and scrambled eggs
26:43oh my and maybe i seem a bit confused well maybe but i got you pegged
26:53but i don't know what to do with those tossed salads and scrambled eggs
27:00they're calling again
27:04good night