• 3 months ago
Transcript
00:00Thunderclap.
00:04Thunderclap.
00:08Thunder.
00:12Thunder.
00:16Thunder.
00:20Thunder.
00:24Thunder.
00:28Thunder.
00:32Thunder.
00:36Thunder.
00:40Thunder.
00:44Thunder.
00:48Thunder.
00:52Thunder.
00:56What do you expect from these sessions?
01:00You know, I have no fucking idea.
01:04Maybe it's a magic trick.
01:08Emotional stability is a constant struggle.
01:12Difficult, but not impossible.
01:16Thunderclap.
01:20Thunderclap.
01:24Thunder.
01:28I met Damien.
01:32Thunderclap.
01:36Thunderclap.
01:40Thunderclap.
01:44Thunderclap.
01:48Thunderclap.
01:52Thunderclap.
01:56Thunderclap.
02:00Thunderclap.
02:04Thunderclap.
02:08Thunderclap.
02:12Thunderclap.
02:16Thunderclap.
02:50I'm sorry, I didn't mean to.
02:51I'm sorry.
02:53I'm sorry.
03:04Fuck.
03:12Fuck.
03:15Hola.
03:16Hola.
03:17I'm sorry.
03:17How are you?
03:19Very well.
03:21Come in.
03:23Excuse me.
03:35This way.
03:43Here?
03:45Yes, yes.
03:47Do you want something to drink or to eat?
03:53Just coffee, if you have any.
03:56Yes.
03:58It won't take long.
04:15I don't remember any of my relationships that didn't have a certain degree of violence, jealousy, possessiveness.
04:34Paradoxically, I've always hated the idea of possession.
04:40The idea that someone would feel like they belonged to them, as if they were an object.
04:52I was able to leave, but I didn't tell him.
04:56I'm so eager to self-destruct.
05:00Here you go.
05:09I'll take this.
05:10Okay, thank you.
05:29The window, please.
05:42There?
05:43Yes, please.
05:44Okay.
06:00What do you expect from life, Daniel?
06:07Well, the usual.
06:10Nothing.
06:12You know I don't have any illusions.
06:15You're still with that theory.
06:17It's not a theory.
06:19It's a life doctrine.
06:22Look.
06:25I believe that if people abstained from illusions, they would make a big change in their lives.
06:33After all, what are illusions?
06:36Ghosts.
06:38They're ghosts.
06:41They're like an aborted chance.
06:45No.
06:46They're the opposite of chance.
06:49Because illusions allow you to play with the future in your mind.
06:54To create an uncertain happiness.
06:59But chance doesn't.
07:02Chance follows its own rules.
07:06You know, if you trust chance,
07:10surely what it brings you will be good.
07:13Even the negative things.
07:19So you never made illusions with me.
07:27I think you're the last illusion I allowed myself.
07:31We both know how that ended, right?
07:34Are you working on something now?
07:39Thank God, I'm not doing bad.
07:41Thank God?
07:43Sorry.
07:44Abel Cebu, I meant.
07:46Weren't you an atheist?
07:49For you, I'm an atheist.
07:51And for God, I'm the loyal opposition.
07:53Remember?
07:54Startless memories.
07:56Exactly.
07:57So, what do you believe in?
08:00What do I believe in?
08:03Well, I believe in Woody Allen's movies.
08:07In Bergman's.
08:10I believe in books.
08:13In the 20 pesos bills I can find on the street.
08:19I believe in theater.
08:22I believe in coffee.
08:26And I believe in my girlfriend's eyes.
08:30I thought you didn't have a girlfriend.
08:32You said you were a passenger or something.
08:37Yeah.
09:00Nothing else?
09:02Do you love her?
09:08Gabi, do you want me to be honest with you?
09:11Yes. I don't understand why you shouldn't be honest.
09:15Maybe because you still love me, right?
09:18What makes you think that?
09:21Come on, Gabi.
09:22You made me come here after so long.
09:25For what?
09:27To find out about you.
09:28Finding you in the square was very fast.
09:30I was in a hurry.
09:31It's been years since I last saw you.
09:33Or maybe because you never could forget me.
09:37I'm sorry to tell you that I'm very happy today.
09:41The world doesn't revolve around you, Damian.
09:44That's good.
09:45Because I don't revolve around you anymore.
09:47You're an idiot.
09:50I remember that you insulted me every time you got tired of saying that you loved me.
09:53And you keep doing the same.
09:55And you think you know me?
09:57Of course, Gabi. You haven't changed a bit.
10:00Do you love her or not?
10:13I had forgotten that I loved seeing your feet.
10:16You always had that obsession.
10:27I'm sorry.
10:57I'm sorry.
11:27I'm sorry.
11:57I'm sorry.
12:27I'm sorry.
12:57I'm sorry.
13:27I'm sorry.
13:29I'm sorry.
13:31I'm sorry.
13:33I'm sorry.
13:35I'm sorry.
13:37I'm sorry.
13:39I'm sorry.
13:41I'm sorry.
13:43I'm sorry.
13:45I'm sorry.
13:47I'm sorry.
13:49I'm sorry.
13:51I'm sorry.
13:53I'm sorry.
13:55I'm sorry.
14:17What does this mean?
14:26Gabriela, you can't play with that.
14:31When you entered this house, you thought this could happen, right?
14:43Tell me, Damian.
14:45Were you thinking about what fascinating technique, taken from a book or movie, you would use to satisfy me?
14:54Or at least believe it.
14:56I mean, you always have such a high ego.
14:59Did you imagine if there would be discomfort when we took off our clothes after so many years?
15:07So many years, I mean.
15:10I would like to know how you visualized the end.
15:14The termination of sex.
15:16I don't know, you, something tender and quiet.
15:21You smoking a cigarette at night, with the doubt of whether there will be a next time or this is the last.
15:31Believe it or not, I didn't know it was coming.
15:33I had no idea.
15:37Besides, what?
15:39You left.
15:41You left me.
15:44You left with Julián, do you think I don't know?
15:47You changed me.
15:50And you are so stupid that you did it with someone whose name rhymes with mine.
15:59And now I don't understand what you're looking for after so long, really.
16:03First, asking me these absurd questions, as always.
16:06And not satisfied with that, sleeping with me, as if that way you could amend your mistakes.
16:12Let me tell you that we were both safe in exile.
16:16And today I am stable.
16:19Me.
16:20Okay?
16:22You are stable.
16:24I made mistakes.
16:27When I left, you were absent for a long time.
16:31Maybe not physically, but you had become someone inaccessible.
16:37You, with all your theories, your books and your movies.
16:41You forgot that life, life beyond your philosophy and your fiction, was on the other side of the window.
16:47For you, I stopped existing.
16:49I became a flowerpot that you looked at from afar and ignored as you passed by.
16:55I made mistakes.
16:56Are you stable now?
16:59How curious, you know?
17:00Because I have this feeling of having felt miserable in the relationship, forgotten in a corner.
17:07Are you stable?
17:09And what about all those times we argued for hours because of your jealousy?
17:14Are you stable now?
17:15Yes?
17:16Are you sure?
17:18Because I ended up as the most insecure and unstable person in the world,
17:21who didn't even dare to say what he truly felt out of fear of disagreeing with you and your wisdom.
17:30Why don't you go to hell?
17:42When I left, it was because I couldn't take it anymore.
17:46I felt like I was dying inside.
17:50Besides,
17:52do you think I didn't know you slept with Gisela?
17:55You also thought of leaving me.
17:57That's not true.
17:58It doesn't matter.
17:59No, it does matter.
18:00Do you listen to me?
18:01No.
18:02You shut up and listen to me.
18:04Am I inaccessible?
18:05Yes.
18:07Since when?
18:08If you were the one who lived unsatisfied.
18:11At least the last two years.
18:12Don't you remember?
18:14Nothing satisfied you.
18:16You always wanted more, more, more, more.
18:18All the time, more and more.
18:20And what about Gisela?
18:21What do you have to say?
18:23She lived free.
18:25She didn't care about anything.
18:27She lived without worries.
18:28That's how it was.
18:30Do you know something?
18:32I hated myself.
18:34I hated myself deeply.
18:37Because I knew I was hurting you.
18:41Maybe that's why I continued it.
18:42Poor you.
18:44Of course I'm poor.
18:46How do you think I have these?
18:48Look.
18:50Do you think I didn't know you were with Julián
18:52during those six months I was away?
18:54If everyone told me.
18:56No.
18:57Sorry.
18:58Someone even had the courtesy of showing me a picture.
19:03I guess you keep it.
19:04They were very handsome.
19:08Since the day you left
19:10without saying anything
19:11because you didn't say anything
19:16I never took my eyes off
19:19the chair where you liked to sit.
19:24Just conjuring you in my memory.
19:25That's how it was.
19:29And there are days and months
19:32that I was depressed
19:33without finding a fucking meaning to anything.
19:35Tell me.
19:37Or worse.
19:38Or worse.
19:40When I found out you were in Europe
19:41and this Julián
19:43had reached you.
19:45How do you think I felt?
19:49Like a complete idiot.
19:51That's how I felt.
19:52Because Europe was our dream.
19:53Not yours.
19:59And now tell me.
20:00How was it?
20:01I want to know everything.
20:03How was it?
20:05Wanting to kill our relationship
20:07made things worse for him?
20:10Or were you lying to us both?
20:12You don't know what you're saying, Damian.
20:16Deep down, you and I are a couple of strangers.
20:19We offer each other
20:20an elaborate fiction of ourselves.
20:24And that's it?
20:26That's it.
20:34During all this time,
20:35in my moments of guilt,
20:39I thought you and I could be lovers again
20:41on a new basis.
20:45What a bullshit.
20:49I saw myself rewarding you.
20:52Spying on my deception.
20:54Paying my debt.
20:57As if only you had been the victim.
21:00Hm.
21:03Now I realize
21:04that you will always prefer
21:06to keep your mythical image
21:08to any more real picture.
21:11So?
21:13Tell me now.
21:14Who lied to you more?
21:15Huh?
21:17Who?
21:24We were together for years.
21:26Deceiving ourselves.
21:30I don't owe you anything.
21:34Breaking up
21:36was the most successful thing we did together.
21:48Do you realize how hate and love
21:51at some point
21:52become the same thing?
21:54In a relationship?
21:55The things that at first attracted you
21:58are now the things you hate the most.
22:00That's why it's important
22:01to keep our desires hidden.
22:04Because when we reach them,
22:06we are doomed not to love them anymore.
22:10Chronic dissatisfaction
22:13is the evil of this generation.
22:16Sometimes I wonder
22:18why we insist on becoming a couple.
22:21If most people
22:22our insecurities,
22:24our demons
22:26end up getting involved
22:27and screwing everything up.
22:30I think we are emotional alphabets.
22:33We can know a lot of things,
22:36but when it comes to exploring
22:37the causes of our conflicts,
22:40we end up running away.
22:43And we go with our wounds
22:44relating to each other.
22:47Without letting them fall apart.
22:49I read somewhere that
22:51lovers are never well paired
22:54because one always ends up
22:56in the shadow of the other,
22:58unable to grow.
23:05Love, by rule,
23:07does not accept honesty.
23:11How absurd, right?
23:13Love,
23:16does not accept honesty.
23:44Love,
23:46does not accept honesty.
23:50Love,
23:52does not accept honesty.
23:55Love,
23:57does not accept honesty.
24:00Love,
24:02does not accept honesty.
24:05Love,
24:07does not accept honesty.
24:13Love,
24:15does not accept honesty.
24:18Love,
24:20does not accept honesty.
24:23Love,
24:25does not accept honesty.
24:28Love,
24:30does not accept honesty.
24:33Love,
24:35does not accept honesty.
24:38Love,
24:40does not accept honesty.
24:43Love,
24:45does not accept honesty.
24:48Love,
24:50does not accept honesty.
24:53Love,
24:55does not accept honesty.
24:58Love,
25:00does not accept honesty.
25:03Love,
25:05does not accept honesty.
25:08Love,
25:10does not accept honesty.
25:13Love,
25:15does not accept honesty.
25:18Love,
25:20does not accept honesty.