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00:00This is the World Wrestling Federation.
00:07This is Monday Night Raw.
00:14This is Monday Night Raw.
00:20This is Monday Night Raw.
00:26This is Monday Night Raw.
00:31This is Monday Night Raw.
00:36This is Monday Night Raw.
00:41Welcome everyone to Monday Night Raw.
00:46Take a look.
00:51Take a look.
00:57It was Ted DiBiase who was embarrassed approximately two weeks ago.
01:01When Ted DiBiase met the one, two, three kid.
01:04Tonight's the return match.
01:06However, let's take you back as we see right now.
01:09An arrogant Ted DiBiase with Razor Ramon now.
01:13Watching what he thought was gonna be a pin, but no.
01:15Look at this.
01:16The kid hooks the shoulder to DiBiase.
01:19An embarrassment and Razor Ramon is jubilant.
01:23Ted DiBiase embarrassed beyond belief.
01:27And Razor Ramon, the bad guy, has the last laugh.
01:32However, in the ring right now, Ted DiBiase,
01:36awaiting the presence of the one, two, three kid,
01:39the return match in order tonight on Monday Night Raw.
01:43And I might add this, perspicuous by their absence,
01:48will be, by all acts, will be Razor Ramon.
01:55In order by the World Wrestling Federation, by the Ramon,
01:59the IRS allowed at ringside tonight.
02:02So therefore, gentlemen, it's one on one.
02:05Well, you're right, McMahon.
02:07It's one on one.
02:08This punk is gonna find out what the Million Dollar Man is all about.
02:12You notice he's not getting in the ring.
02:14I can hear his knees knocking.
02:16I can smell the sweat rolling off his head.
02:18He is scared to death, that punk.
02:20I'll tell you what, this is Ted DiBiase's big match.
02:24He's gonna try to get some respectability back.
02:26He was embarrassed by the one, two, three kid.
02:29Live, dig it.
02:31Yeah, with a one, two, three kid on the outside and
02:33a little on the apprehensive side, as you might imagine.
02:35Nonetheless, it just seems like this is a miracle.
02:39Young man is just unbelievable what he does in the square circle.
02:42You can never, ever count him down.
02:44Listen to this.
02:45One, two, three.
02:46One, two, three.
02:48You know what that is, McMahon?
02:49What's that?
02:50These are the people of Poughkeepsie practicing their numbers.
02:53I see.
02:54That's all they can count to.
02:55Well, in the World Wrestling Federation, that's all you need to count to.
02:58One, two, three.
02:59You should know that, Mr. Heenan, as many times as you are pinned in a match.
03:02I never was pinned.
03:03I beg your pardon?
03:04I never was pinned.
03:05Please.
03:06Thank goodness this match is on right now.
03:08Right at 9 o'clock.
03:09DiBiase now with a one, two, three kid.
03:11Right away going to work on him.
03:13You would suspect that Ted DiBiase has been waiting for over two weeks, I believe.
03:17It's accurate to say that DiBiase has been seething.
03:20He's been waiting for this opportunity to return matchup.
03:23He came out firing, no doubt about it.
03:25And the one, two, three kid's a little tentative.
03:27But you never know.
03:28We've learned that.
03:29One, two, three.
03:31One, two, three.
03:32And now, the canvas, the one, two, three kid.
03:35One, two, three.
03:36This match has to be over by 9.30.
03:38I beg your pardon?
03:39That's the kid's curfew.
03:40He has to be in bed by 9.30.
03:42Listen to this crowd.
03:45Off the rope now.
03:46Oh, my.
03:47Needed a midsection.
03:48Ted DiBiase will step into SummerSlam in two weeks.
03:51Two weeks from tonight.
03:52Ted DiBiase steps into SummerSlam and squares off against Reyes Ramon.
03:57Your analysis.
03:58You know that.
03:59But guess what?
04:00Before that ever happens, next Sunday, SummerSpectacular,
04:03SummerSlam Spectacular, Big Steel Cage Match.
04:06On the phone right now, ladies and gentlemen, Razor Ramon, I believe.
04:12Hello.
04:13Yes, Razor, can you hear us?
04:14It's me, man, the bad guy.
04:16Well, Razor, one, two, three kid in there against Ted DiBiase.
04:21Neither you nor I or anyone else anywhere around.
04:23What do you think the kid's chances are?
04:25You know, you've got to admit, McMahon, this kid,
04:28he does some things that people never seen.
04:30Yeah.
04:31I think he got some surprises for DiBiase.
04:34I see.
04:35I spoke to the kid.
04:36We talked it over.
04:38He got a few surprises to show DiBiase.
04:41Well, any advice from you?
04:44I can't tell you, McMahon, because, you know, I understand you've got a big mouth.
04:48But I told the kid a few secrets, but he would make one deal with the bad guy.
04:54What's that?
04:55He promised to leave just a little piece of the rich man for the bad guy at SummerSlam.
05:02Thank you for joining us, Razor Ramon.
05:05Don't doubt that call was collected.
05:08I doubt that very seriously.
05:10Now, was that Razor Ramon or Desi Arnaz?
05:12Who are we talking to?
05:13That was Razor Ramon.
05:14He's not looking for Little Ricky, is he, or Lucy, huh?
05:16No, definitely not.
05:19What DiBiase is looking for is some revenge.
05:21That's what he's looking for.
05:23He hasn't launched much of an offense, has he, McMahon?
05:25No.
05:26He's been intimidated since he came out here.
05:28That's true.
05:29I'll agree with you.
05:30He has.
05:31Of course you'll agree with me.
05:32I'm right.
05:33Ted DiBiase really pouring it on the one, two, three kid.
05:36And unquestionably, Randy Savage, DiBiase, the odds are in favor to win the matchup.
05:40Exactly.
05:41But he was the last time, too.
05:43And it didn't happen the way that he wanted it to.
05:45There he goes.
05:46Come on.
05:47Little momentum.
05:48One, two, three, kid.
05:49Let's do it again.
05:50Not much momentum there in the corner.
05:51Ted DiBiase now setting up the kid for the ride to the buckle.
05:54Wow, did you see that?
05:55He hit that ring so hard, the ring moved about six feet.
05:58Randy, don't let him get on the floor.
06:00That's right, go out after him.
06:01Wait a minute.
06:02Throw him back in that ring.
06:03And the kid very alertly going back into the ring.
06:05Going to the ropes now.
06:06Coming back over Ted DiBiase.
06:08Back to the far side.
06:09Oh, no.
06:10Shiveling for the five.
06:11Hands under the cover.
06:13Down at two.
06:14That may change the momentum.
06:15Drop kick.
06:16Down goes Ted DiBiase.
06:17The kid with another one.
06:18And now another cover.
06:20Leg is hooked.
06:21An easy kick out by Ted DiBiase.
06:23And the kid better stay on top of him.
06:26And to the buckle, the kid.
06:28Whoa.
06:29We are live on Monday Night Raw.
06:33And Ted DiBiase is really giving it to the kid.
06:37Well, he should.
06:38That punk thinks he embarrassed DiBiase.
06:40He thinks he beat DiBiase.
06:42He didn't.
06:43It was a fluke.
06:44And you know it.
06:45DiBiase, of course, blaming Razor for that defeat.
06:47And DiBiase and Razor will clash, as we spoke earlier of,
06:50the matchup in two weeks' time from tonight at SummerSlam.
06:54I think you're going to see who the bad guy is.
06:57And they are chaining Razor.
06:59Yes, indeed.
07:00Oh, my.
07:01And the more they chant Razor, the more
07:03DiBiase delivers the blows to the kid.
07:06Ted DiBiase's tag team partner, IRS,
07:09likewise headed to SummerSlam to lock up with this young man,
07:12the one, two, three kid.
07:14Oh, look at that.
07:16DiBiase.
07:18Kid going to the top.
07:19He is, indeed.
07:20The one, two, three kid on the top rope.
07:22What's going to happen?
07:23Oh!
07:24Running fast to it.
07:26No, he can't get it.
07:28He's going to go again.
07:30Don't ask.
07:31Just do it, kid.
07:32Very high risk maneuver on the part of the one, two, three kid
07:35now going out.
07:36Hey.
07:37Wait a minute.
07:38There's IRS.
07:40Oh, come on.
07:41I thought he was on a lot of ringside.
07:44Well, he makes his own rules.
07:45I guess he feels he can go wherever he wants.
07:47It's okay with me.
07:48But Razor's not in the building.
07:50They're punishing this kid.
07:52Razor's not in the building, and they're punishing this young man.
07:56Well, he asked for it.
07:57He did not.
07:58Yes, he did.
07:59He's been bragging how he beat DiBiase,
08:00how he's going to beat IRS at SummerSlam.
08:02There was no reason.
08:03There was absolutely no reason for Irwin to come down.
08:06Wait a minute.
08:07Here come the Steiner brothers, Rick and Scott.
08:09Uh-oh.
08:12Pandemonium here on Monday Night Raw.
08:18Scott Steiner, Rick Steiner giving it to Money Incorporated.
08:24Oh, my.
08:25To the outside.
08:28And the goose left on the inside.
08:31Disqualification.
08:32The one, two, three kid.
08:36A disqualification, a justifiable disqualification
08:40on the part of Ted DiBiase,
08:42with Irwin shoving the one, two, three kid off that top rope.
08:47Once again, it is a defeat in the record book for Ted DiBiase.
08:51Well, he didn't beat him.
08:52He wanted disqualification.
08:54Irwin's sending a message to the Punk Kid.
08:56Wait till SummerSlam.
08:58There's two columns, Bobby.
09:00He did a win count.
09:02There's two columns, Bobby.
09:03He did a win column and a loss column.
09:06Exactly.
09:07And you know where this one goes for Ted DiBiase.
09:09Neither column, because he didn't beat him.
09:11It was just a disqualification.
09:13Don't you understand the rules?
09:14Do I have to get a rule book out to show you things?
09:16Don't you understand?
09:17I don't think we'd want to read your rule book.
09:20The Steiner brothers, along with the one, two, three kid.
09:24By the way, coming up a little bit later on,
09:27we're going to see Bastian Buggerall,
09:28400 and some odd pounds of him,
09:30squaring off against Marty Jannetty.
09:32Well, I think we've seen the last of Marty Jannetty,
09:35because Bastian Bugger will beat him so bad,
09:38I got to pick Bugger to win that one.
09:41And Randy, I think you have a little something for us?
09:44I got a surprise that's guaranteed to satisfy everybody.
09:48Stay tuned.
09:50A surprise that just keeps on giving and giving and giving.
09:54Oh, yeah.
09:55I love surprises.
09:57Really?
09:58Yes.
09:59We're going to find out what the surprise is momentarily,
10:02but look at this.
10:04Erwin with the shove,
10:05and we'll be back with more Monday Night Raw.
10:08Stay with us, everybody.
10:10Monday Night Raw.
10:12Monday Night Raw.
10:17We're back live from the MidHudson Civic Center
10:20for more Monday Night Raw.
10:22You don't want to miss, ladies and gentlemen,
10:24the next WWF presentation right here on the USA Network.
10:29Brace yourself for an event of epic proportions.
10:32Hacksaw Jim Duggan battles WWF champion Yokozuna.
10:36A rematch of their first and brutal encounter.
10:39Tag team champions, the Snyder Brothers,
10:41take on Money Incorporated.
10:43A war inside a steel cage for the title.
10:46Before the showdown in Motown
10:49comes the SummerSlam Spectacular
10:51this Sunday night on USA.
10:55What a spectacular that's going to be.
10:58Yes, it is spectacular,
11:00but then again, so is the SummerSlam Spectacular
11:03this coming Sunday night.
11:05The cage match with the Steiners
11:07against Money and Hacksaw Jim Duggan
11:11against Yokozuna.
11:12Well, in that cage match,
11:14there is no winner.
11:16There can't be a winner.
11:17Even if you win that match,
11:18you're going to feel it for months to come.
11:20The most dangerous match in the World Wrestling Federation.
11:23Speaking of dangerous,
11:24that'll lead us to this tag team,
11:26the HeadShrinkers.
11:27Samuel Batu, managed by former tag team great
11:31and champion of his own right, Afaf.
11:34Exactly.
11:35The HeadShrinkers want to knock out everybody
11:37until they get in line for a title shot.
11:39That's their plan.
11:43HeadShrinkers, a vicious tag team combination.
11:46Are they ever.
11:47Are they ever.
11:50I don't think you can hurt them.
11:51You can beat on them all day.
11:52Apo likes to bang their heads together.
11:54They love it.
11:57Do you like home cooking?
12:00She fed it.
12:01She stopped her dog from eating at the table, begging.
12:03I beg your pardon.
12:04You know, she did it.
12:05She fed him.
12:06You know, Bobby Heenan.
12:08What?
12:09Let's have a little reference.
12:10I mean, after all,
12:11this is the anniversary of the
12:13demise of Elvis Presley.
12:15That's right.
12:16And I'll tell you something about that.
12:18After the RIP match with The Undertaker
12:21and The Giant Gonzalez,
12:22The Undertaker can meet Elvis firsthand.
12:26Wait a minute.
12:27You're assuming that Elvis has passed on.
12:29I mean, there are a number of individuals
12:31who don't agree with that.
12:32There are a number of individuals,
12:33probably 7%, I believe,
12:34a recent poll stated that 7% of the populace.
12:37Look out!
12:38Here in the United States,
12:39believes that Elvis is still hanging around.
12:41Well, an 84%,
12:43they don't believe it.
12:45They think he's at Graceland mowing the lawn.
12:48Ooh, what a chop.
12:51That is, uh, Samu.
12:56Samu setting up his opponent,
12:57missing with a-
12:58Oh!
12:59Did you see that?
13:00Oh!
13:01My goodness.
13:02Heard that kick all the way in Denver.
13:10And the translation-
13:11Watch your man.
13:12I can't help you with that one, Vince McMahon.
13:14I dropped out.
13:15I got it.
13:16Wait a minute now.
13:17Here we're talking about National Honor Society.
13:19Macho Man Randy Savage,
13:20but you can't give me that translation.
13:22That was like an overseas thing.
13:23You got it.
13:24I got it.
13:25What'd he say?
13:26He said he's gonna snap his tongue out of his head
13:27so he looks like a castaway.
13:29That's not a verb.
13:30He's not what he said.
13:31That is exactly what he said.
13:32I like my explanation better.
13:34The Head Shrinkers on their way
13:36to SummerSlam.
13:37They're gonna be teaming up in a six-man matchup
13:39with the Beast from the East, Bam Bam Bigelow,
13:42as we take a look at this, no doubt,
13:44double team effort coming up.
13:45Oh, my goodness.
13:47And his lovely squeeze
13:48Luna Vashon.
13:49Whoa!
13:50I got him on it.
13:51Bam Bam and the Head Shrinkers
13:52in a six-man matchup
13:54against the undefeated Native American,
13:56Tataka, and his partners,
13:58the Smoking Guns,
13:59and they have been smoking lately.
14:00Well, I understand they went to college
14:02on a rodeo scholarship.
14:03Isn't that wonderful?
14:05Let's go out back and hanker a bit, huh?
14:07Let's go put some straw in our teeth
14:08and maybe walk through the meadow
14:10and step over those big meadow muffins
14:11that the cows leave.
14:12That'd be great.
14:13A meadow muffin?
14:15A meadow muffin.
14:16I'd like to see you on the back
14:17of one of those Bronx,
14:19one of those Brahma Bulls.
14:20Would that be a sight?
14:21Absolutely.
14:22Any place but here, Bobby Heenan,
14:23that would be cool.
14:25And again.
14:27Boom.
14:29The face meets the mat.
14:30Double team effort.
14:32These guys are cold and calloused,
14:34the Head Shrinkers are.
14:36They mean business.
14:37Look at this.
14:38There's bodies laying all over the place.
14:39It's like the St. Valentine's Day Massacre.
14:42It does indeed,
14:43and I don't understand the official
14:45in this case because one of the opponents
14:50is out.
14:52He's totally out,
14:53and he has been out
14:54since the beginning of the matchup.
14:55I certainly hope he's all right.
14:57We don't do what you never listen.
14:59We want a shot at that title.
15:01He's out cold.
15:02Be ready because we're coming.
15:04Well, now we understand
15:05that Alpha speaks English of sorts.
15:08Oh!
15:09Forget about it.
15:11Unbelievable.
15:13I think Zebra Man is still out.
15:17Here are your winners,
15:19the Head Shrinkers!
15:22Head Shrinkers victorious
15:25on their way to SummerSlam
15:26two weeks from tonight
15:28teaming up with Bam-Bam Bigelow.
15:32And I was expecting to see,
15:34quite unfortunately,
15:36require a little medical attention for
15:38one of the young men.
15:40Let's go back to the replay now
15:42and take another look.
15:43Look at the altitude, Big Man.
15:45Look at the height.
15:46300 pounds crashing down on him.
15:49Wow.
15:51What a tag team the Head Shrinkers are.
15:54A force to reckon with.
15:55Right now, let's take you to me,
15:56Gene Oakley,
15:57and a special SummerSlam report.
16:08Good evening, America.
16:09This SummerSlam report
16:11is brought to you by Chevrolet,
16:13the most dependable,
16:14longest-lasting trucks like a rock.
16:18Count them.
16:19Just two weeks from tonight
16:21at the Palace of Auburn Hills
16:23in suburban Detroit,
16:24it's SummerSlam.
16:26You can see it live
16:27on pay-per-view television
16:28Monday night, August 30th
16:30at 8 p.m. Eastern.
16:32Contact your local cable company right now.
16:35In the main event, Lex Luger.
16:37As we found out last week
16:38here on Monday Night Raw,
16:39during that contract signing,
16:41Luger will have his one and only shot
16:44at capturing the World Wrestling Federation
16:46title from Yokozuna.
16:48That shot will be taking place
16:50at SummerSlam.
16:51That stipulation showing up simultaneously,
16:54by the way,
16:55with James E. Cornett,
16:57who showed up as the official
16:58American spokesperson
17:00for Yokozuna and Mr. Fuji.
17:02With royalty up for grabs,
17:04it's the King of the Ring,
17:06Bret the Hitman Hart,
17:08meeting the self-proclaimed King,
17:10Jerry Lawler.
17:11Folks, this one has really
17:13gotten personal.
17:15And the Undertaker
17:16meets the eight-foot-tall
17:18giant Gonzalez
17:19in a rest in peace match.
17:21The Undertaker,
17:22the only one who knows the rules,
17:24and he has said absolutely nothing.
17:27Intercontinental champion
17:28Shawn Michaels with bodyguard
17:29Diesel in his corner
17:31defends against two-time
17:32former Intercontinental champion
17:34Mr. Perfect.
17:36And over the weekend,
17:37we found out that
17:38Ludwig Borga from Finland
17:40will be meeting
17:41Marty Jannetty at SummerSlam
17:43and the World Wrestling Federation
17:45Tag Team Champions,
17:46the Steiners,
17:48return to their home turf
17:49in Michigan
17:50to defend against
17:51James E. Cornett's
17:53heavenly bodies.
17:55And, of course,
17:56the other matches that we talked about
17:57earlier in the hour.
17:59The SummerSlam card is complete,
18:01and it's a great one.
18:02Join us live on pay-per-view
18:04two weeks from tonight
18:05from suburban Detroit.
18:06Contact the cable company
18:07you're watching right now
18:09for Monday night,
18:10August 30th at 8 p.m. Eastern.
18:13Folks, don't miss SummerSlam.
18:15Vince, let's get back to you
18:17and the Macho Man,
18:18and, of course, my favorite.
18:19Yes, he's a great broadcaster.
18:21He's a great journalist.
18:22He's a philanthropist.
18:24He is a former world-class
18:25wrestler and manager.
18:27Let's get back to the Weasel.
18:29Hey!
18:30All right!
18:31Who do you think he is
18:32talking to me like that?
18:33That little skinhead?
18:34I'll pull his ears up so high,
18:35his hair will finally meet.
18:37That little geek
18:38talking to me.
18:39Get a hold of yourself.
18:41Schedule next up,
18:42ladies and gentlemen.
18:43Uh!
18:44Are you kidding me?
18:45What is that?
18:46That's Oakerland.
18:47That is not.
18:48That's Bastion...
18:50Booger.
18:51Yeah.
18:52Bastion Booger
18:53goes one-on-one
18:55with Marley Jannetty.
18:56What a match-up.
18:57This is going to be
18:58win-win.
18:59Return with more Raw.
19:02Oh, my.
19:03We are live.
19:04And maybe missing a few teeth,
19:06but we're here on Monday Night Raw.
19:09Oh, you missed it.
19:10He came out of the dressing room
19:11area.
19:12He had that ice cream.
19:13He dropped it on the floor,
19:14picked it up with his hands,
19:15and just whooped it down.
19:17Yeah, we really missed it.
19:18I'm sorry we couldn't
19:19give that to the fans.
19:20I saw it,
19:21but I didn't want to say
19:22anything about it.
19:23Bastion Booger
19:24and Famous Parody's
19:26his opponent,
19:27Beauty and the Beast.
19:28And look who's coming to town.
19:30235 pounds,
19:32Marley Jannetty.
19:38Marley Jannetty
19:39against Bastion Booger.
19:41What is that smell?
19:43That's Booger.
19:47Wow.
19:48Two contrasting styles here.
19:51You might say that.
19:53Well, if Jannetty thinks
19:54he's gonna fly around that ring,
19:56he's gonna get hurt.
19:58He's gotta get Booger down.
20:00Beg your pardon?
20:01He's gotta get Booger down.
20:02I don't like the way he says that.
20:05Marley Jannetty.
20:06Look at those wristbands.
20:07Talk about red, white, and blue.
20:08Talk about supporting Lex Luger
20:10and Mr. Luger's efforts
20:12to become the World Wrestling
20:13Federation Champion
20:14at SummerSlam.
20:15Jannetty's right there
20:16along with my colleague
20:17sitting to my right,
20:19the Macho Man.
20:20Absolutely.
20:21And the Lex Express
20:22is running wild.
20:24Yeah.
20:25Matter of fact,
20:26as we speak,
20:27I believe the Lex Express
20:28is in Denver, Colorado.
20:31And I don't know
20:32whether Jannetty's gonna fall
20:33for this or not.
20:35This will be an excellent test
20:36here for Marley Jannetty.
20:39Jannetty with a stellar career
20:40thus far in the
20:41World Wrestling Federation.
20:42He goes to SummerSlam
20:43to face Ludwig Borga,
20:46who's not really quite
20:47as big as this man,
20:49Bastian Booger.
20:50So it's gonna be
20:51a classic example of,
20:52well, I believe,
20:53what Jannetty can do
20:54against a big, powerful man.
20:55Let's not forget
20:56that Marley Jannetty
20:57is a former
20:58Intercontinental Champion.
20:59Indeed.
21:00Well, Ludwig Borga
21:02is really put together,
21:03and he has such
21:04a mean attitude,
21:05Jannetty probably
21:06won't last 30 seconds.
21:08Oh, please.
21:09If he survives tonight.
21:14Jannetty,
21:16thus far,
21:17outmaneuvering Bastian Booger.
21:18That's exactly what
21:19Jannetty's gonna have to do
21:20against Ludwig Borga.
21:21And again,
21:22easily outmaneuvering
21:24Bastian Booger.
21:25Whoa, yeah!
21:26Gets him off his feet, too,
21:27and can't quite put him away.
21:31Hot-rod kick
21:32on the big man
21:33having his problems
21:34with Marley Jannetty.
21:36Hip toss.
21:37Look at that.
21:38I'm surprised.
21:39I am, too.
21:40Drop kick.
21:41But the big man
21:42doesn't go down,
21:43and another drop kick.
21:44Whoa!
21:48Bastian Booger,
21:50I believe,
21:51was trying to get out
21:52of harm's way
21:53when he was on
21:54that drop kick,
21:55and the momentum
21:56carried him
21:57into the top rope.
21:58Exactly.
21:59Emergency landing,
22:00trying to pick up the pace.
22:01Look at this.
22:02That's the way
22:03to bring it to Bastian Booger.
22:04That plan ain't gonna work.
22:05And that may do it.
22:06I'm not too sure.
22:07Booger's gonna get back
22:08in the ring
22:09before being counted out.
22:13Jannetty.
22:14Oh, real cute Jannetty
22:15with a...
22:16Look at this rope!
22:17Oh, yes!
22:18That's what you have to do
22:19if you're gonna beat a big man.
22:20That wasn't cute.
22:21That was devastating.
22:23That's exactly,
22:24I believe,
22:25what Marty Jannetty
22:26is prepared to do
22:27against Luke Big Booger.
22:28You're gonna have to take
22:29those high-risk maneuvers.
22:35Oh, he's got a plan.
22:36He's got him down.
22:37Look at this.
22:38Look at this.
22:39Oh, my!
22:40Little viciousness
22:41from Marty Jannetty.
22:42I like it.
22:43Oh, my.
22:44Look at the kisser.
22:45Look at the hump.
22:46He's got a hump on his...
22:47Where, where, where?
22:48Right behind his head
22:49there's a hump.
22:51And with this wonderful picture,
22:52ladies and gentlemen,
22:53we will leave you momentarily.
22:55We're told we're gonna have to
22:56take this commercial break.
22:58My favorite booger.
23:01We're live from
23:02the Mid-Hudson Civic Center
23:03in Poughkeepsie, New York,
23:04Monday Night Raw,
23:05Bastion Booger
23:06and Marty Jannetty going at it.
23:07Jannetty threw the ropes
23:08to the outside
23:09but landing on his feet.
23:10Jannetty now scooping the ankle.
23:11First time Marty Jannetty's
23:12had a lot of success
23:13with this huge,
23:14powerful Bastion Booger.
23:18Jannetty has been able
23:19to thwart the massive torso
23:22of this man.
23:24Remember all around me,
23:25just peppering with rights and lefts.
23:27And look at the...
23:28Oh, no.
23:29Jannetty hit the post.
23:30Forget about it.
23:34He probably won't wake up
23:35till his birthday.
23:37My goodness,
23:38speaking of birthdays.
23:40You know whose birthday this is,
23:41Bobby?
23:42Yes, I do.
23:43Who's it?
23:44Very good friend of mine.
23:45Yep.
23:46Madonna.
23:47Remember that day?
23:48Jannetty's just been pinned
23:49against the post.
23:51Not too sure Jannetty's gonna
23:52have another birthday after that.
23:55Yes, today is Madonna's birthday.
23:57Yeah.
23:58Remember that hit song she had?
23:59Like a booger.
24:01Something like that, wasn't it?
24:03Something like that.
24:04Yeah.
24:05I wonder if Madonna would be
24:06interested in Bastion.
24:08There's the hump.
24:09There's the hump.
24:11It's gone down a lot.
24:13Really?
24:14The hump?
24:15The hump.
24:16Back into the ring now.
24:17Jannetty coming off the rope.
24:18Bastion.
24:19Back body drop.
24:21Again, more damage to the back
24:22area of Marty Jannetty.
24:24Well, he's humpless now.
24:30You can sense the momentum
24:31shifting back here.
24:32The Bastion Booger just
24:33hammering away on Jannetty.
24:36I'll tell you, if Jannetty
24:37loses this one, I'm gonna call
24:38it a big upset.
24:43It's amazing how the humanoids
24:44can get behind a guy like
24:45Jannetty.
24:46Off the rope.
24:47Back body drop.
24:48No.
24:49Jannetty trying to get him.
24:50And look out.
24:51He comes down on Jannetty.
24:52One, two, three.
24:55Got him.
24:56Two, three.
24:58He's got him.
25:00Thumbs up for Marty Jannetty.
25:02Against all odds,
25:04Marty Jannetty.
25:08Marty Jannetty heads to
25:10SummerSlam two weeks from
25:12tonight to face Ludwig Borga.
25:16Let's go back and take another
25:17look at the replay.
25:20Winners never quit and
25:21quitters never win.
25:22It looked like Marty Jannetty's
25:23back was against the wall.
25:25Right here, Bastion Booger
25:26doesn't need a chair.
25:27He uses Marty Jannetty.
25:29Well, watch this.
25:30Right before the three count.
25:32Unbelievable.
25:33Thumbs up for Marty Jannetty.
25:35Yeah, baby.
25:38Check it out.
25:39And now he is victorious.
25:41Oh, yeah, Marty.
25:45Promotional consideration
25:46paid for by the following.
25:56Ikepro, you've got to want it.
26:02Ladies and gentlemen,
26:04would you please welcome
26:05Money Incorporated.
26:08Money, money, money, money, money.
26:18Everybody's got a price.
26:22Here they are.
26:24Money Incorporated.
26:28And these guys
26:30individually caused pandemonium
26:32in the first match right here
26:34Monday Night Raw live.
26:36I must say, gentlemen,
26:38I don't see the faces
26:40of very happy campers.
26:44Let me tell you
26:46and all these tax-cheating
26:48morons around here
26:49something, McMahon.
26:51First of all,
26:52the one, two, three kid
26:54just got a little taste
26:56of what's going to happen
26:57in SummerSlam.
26:59Well, of course,
27:00that may or may not be true.
27:01But then again, Ted DiBiase,
27:02you're going to get a taste
27:04of Razor Ramon at SummerSlam.
27:06Let me tell you something,
27:07Vince McMahon.
27:08I hope Razor Ramon was watching.
27:11And I hope the Steiners,
27:12before they stuck their nose
27:14in our business,
27:15was watching real close
27:17to what happened
27:18to the one, two, three kid
27:19out here tonight.
27:21Because that is what you call
27:23one picture worth a thousand words.
27:26One picture.
27:27You, Razor Ramon,
27:28at SummerSlam
27:30are going to pay
27:32the ultimate price.
27:33The Steiner Brothers.
27:34Let's talk about
27:35the Steiner Brothers.
27:38Because I'm not too sure
27:40that either one of you
27:41two gentlemen
27:42are going to make it
27:43to SummerSlam.
27:44I mean,
27:45or at least in the condition
27:46you're in now,
27:47because right here on USA,
27:50we're talking about
27:51this Sunday night,
27:52the steel cage matchup
27:54with the Steiner Brothers.
27:57Well, you know what,
27:58Vince McMahon?
27:59It's like we're real stupid.
28:00Stupid like a fox.
28:02I always say,
28:03everybody's got a price
28:04for the million dollar man,
28:05and there's nobody
28:06that we can't buy jointly.
28:08When they signed the contract,
28:10the Climbing the Ring
28:11with Money Incorporated
28:12and a steel cage,
28:14they were bought
28:15and paid for.
28:18Well, there are a number
28:19of stipulations, Erwin.
28:21Let me remind you
28:22of something else here, McMahon.
28:24If I were the Steiner Brothers,
28:25I would be worried
28:27about making it to SummerSlam,
28:28because when we get
28:30our hands on them,
28:31we're gonna take the titles,
28:33and they're gonna go
28:34into SummerSlam
28:36a bunch of losers,
28:37just like they came in
28:38to the WWF.
28:40Shut up!
28:42I've been away from them,
28:43Vince McMahon.
28:44Yes, the Steiners are big.
28:46They're strong.
28:47They're one of the most agile teams
28:48that we've ever been
28:49in the ring with.
28:50But between the two of them,
28:51they've got a cumulative IQ
28:52of about 10.
28:54They're stupid.
28:55You can't climb in a ring
28:56with Money Incorporated.
28:58Thus far, they have been lucky,
29:00and they have cheated.
29:01Everybody's got their day.
29:03Wait a minute.
29:04Mr. DiBiase, come on.
29:05Stop.
29:06You guys,
29:07we're talking
29:08a steel cage match.
29:09We're talking
29:10the most grueling match
29:11there is in the WWF.
29:13Exactly.
29:14And you think
29:15we don't know
29:16how to use a weapon?
29:17Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
29:20Well, clearly,
29:21it's the first team
29:22out of the cage
29:23declared victorious.
29:25I mean, in terms of agility,
29:26in terms of speed and stamina,
29:28I believe most people
29:29would give
29:30the Steiner Brothers
29:31the advantage.
29:32Hey, McMahon,
29:33let me point something out.
29:34That big M
29:35on the Steiner Brothers jacket
29:36stands for morons.
29:38And we're gonna show
29:39everybody out there
29:40that Money Incorporated
29:41not only has the money,
29:43we have the means
29:44and the brains
29:45to beat the Steiner Brothers
29:46in a cage match,
29:47and it's gonna happen.
29:48All right, Ruby,
29:49thank you very much.
29:50Ladies and gentlemen,
29:51they're headed
29:52to SummerSlam,
29:53and they're headed
29:54to the SummerSlam Spectacular
29:55this Sunday night
29:56in the steel cage
29:57to face the Steiner Brothers.
30:01Don't go away
30:02because coming up next
30:04is Mom.
30:05Not my mom,
30:06but Man on a Mission.
30:07And I've been hanging out
30:08with them all year.
30:09Oscar, Moe, and Mabel.
30:12Men on a Mission
30:13coming up next
30:14right here
30:15on Monday Night Raw.
30:17Don't miss it.
30:22Aha, we're back.
30:24What's up, McKenzie?
30:27Yeah, we're live.
30:30Here they come.
30:31Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
30:33yeah, yeah, yeah.
30:35Throw your hands in the air
30:37and wave them like
30:38you just don't care.
30:40If you're ready
30:41for Wednesday Night Raw,
30:42give it up and say,
30:43oh, yeah.
30:45Oh, yeah.
30:46Oh, yeah.
30:47Oh, yeah.
30:49Oh, where am I?
30:51Monday Night Raw.
30:53Yo, what's up?
30:54Man on a Mission.
30:56I know where I am.
30:57Where you?
30:58I'm watching Man on a Mission.
31:00Oh!
31:01Oh!
31:02Oh!
31:03Oh!
31:04Somebody, anybody.
31:06Everybody's great.
31:10That's Oscar with a mic.
31:13Mabel and Moe,
31:14the tag team
31:15known as Men on a Mission.
31:18Again, make it work.
31:19This team is happening,
31:20and just like later on,
31:22I still got that surprise.
31:23We haven't forgotten about the surprise.
31:25I haven't a clue, haven't a clue.
31:28Jerry Horowitz and Iron Mike Sharp getting it on with men on a mission.
31:32Moe and Mabel, that's Moe starting things off against Jerry Horowitz.
31:36They certainly live in a nice neighborhood.
31:37I wonder what kind of a weekend race you can get there with the family, maybe.
31:41Go play a little golf or something, huh?
31:43Nice neighborhood.
31:46Nothing wrong with the hood, Mr. Hinton, as Horowitz ripped off the rope.
31:49And nice back body drop by Moe.
31:51Yeah, ha, ha.
31:52Moe and Mabel.
31:58And look out, here comes the big man now.
32:01Now this is Mabel?
32:02That's Mabel.
32:03Drop toe, hold back.
32:05My goodness, ho, ho.
32:08Good night.
32:10Outrageous.
32:13By the way, speaking of outrageous, that would lead us to the movie you don't wanna
32:16miss here on USA Thursday night.
32:19As going for the ride there, Horowitz, the tag is made.
32:23Iron Mike Sharp comes in and coming into your living room.
32:26Thursday night, it's outrageous comedy and adventure when Bette Midler and
32:30Shelly Long run for their lives in Outrageous Fortune.
32:35USA will be special, ha, ha, look at this.
32:38Thursday night at nine.
32:39And a lot of people don't know, Bette Midler and
32:41Shelly Long put an application in.
32:43They wanna be Raw Girls.
32:45No kidding.
32:45Yep.
32:46Great.
32:48Amazing.
32:50I know all this stuff.
32:51Yes, you.
32:52You're full of information.
32:53Hey, Weasel, have you figured out my surprise?
32:56Are you speaking to me?
32:58Self-explanatory.
32:59I know what the surprise is.
33:00I know exactly what the surprise is.
33:02What is it?
33:04You're going to retire.
33:05Leave me alone.
33:06Ha, ha, ha.
33:07We're not fucking kidding about it.
33:09That's what I'm talking about.
33:11That's what I'm talking about.
33:12Damn.
33:12Aw, shut up.
33:13Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
33:15I'd like to see Oscar versus The Weasel.
33:18I'd like to see that match, too.
33:20From the top now.
33:23What is going, wow.
33:25I'm not sure what to call that hold.
33:27Neither, but it's successful.
33:30Maybe a plane crash.
33:31Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
33:34That's what I'm saying.
33:36Midler and Mitchell, number one, they hold.
33:39Somebody say, hell.
33:41Hell.
33:42Oh, no.
33:42Say, hell.
33:43Hell.
33:43Ha, ha, ha.
33:44Oh, no.
33:45I hate country and western rap.
33:47Country and western rap, that's what they're doing.
33:51They're not a mission victorious, ladies and gentlemen.
33:54And the fans here are alive and having a good old time
33:58on Monday Night Raw.
34:01All right, standing by.
34:02We're going to take you now to the ongoing saga, if you would.
34:08Commentary from Lex Luger.
34:09He speaks of drugs and sports and anabolic steroids.
34:16Well, being a professional athlete feels like all my life.
34:21I think there's always that temptation there.
34:24You're in a high profile position.
34:25People want to be around you.
34:26Not always positive influences.
34:29Usually, you're fortunate enough to make quite a bit of money
34:32at a very young age.
34:33I don't think your maturity is quite cut up
34:35with your checkbook.
34:36And I think that obviously makes a lot of people
34:41And, you know, I'll be quite honest, we all mature
34:45and we go through these processes, like I said earlier.
34:48And I never had a drug problem, but I went through
34:51the experimentation that a lot of young athletes,
34:53professional athletes, go through,
34:55and I've worked my way through that.
34:58Lex Luger, are you taking steroids?
35:01Emphatically, yes, I am taking steroids.
35:04I've been on steroids for a long time.
35:06I've been on steroids for a long time.
35:08I've been on steroids for a long time.
35:10Emphatically, absolutely no.
35:12And, you know, that's a real hot button with me
35:15because, once again, the maturation process
35:19of being an athlete and all the pressures you feel,
35:22the peer pressure that you feel from football
35:25and professional wrestling.
35:27Antibiotic steroids, before they became illegal,
35:30were very prevalent in athletics.
35:32I'm not denying that they still aren't prevalent
35:34at this point in time.
35:35But there's one thing I do know.
35:37They're not prevalent in any shape, form, or manner
35:40here, right now, in the World Wrestling Federation.
35:43But I will be totally frank and honest.
35:46Before they became illegal, I was a steroid user.
35:50And, yes, I did use them.
35:51I wasn't an abuser of steroids, but I did use them.
35:54But I think it makes it so much more meaningful to me
35:57now that knowing I didn't need a shortcut.
36:00That, yeah, like we said earlier,
36:02maybe I'm a mesomorph.
36:03We have fortune enough to have some genetic gifts
36:07more so than the other person.
36:09But I think that now I know that I can look good
36:13if I train hard, if I eat right, and do the proper things.
36:18Anybody out there, and I know because I've done it myself,
36:22can build a lot of good quality muscle
36:25and look good without antibiotic steroids.
36:27I'm especially proud of this and especially, especially
36:31for the young kids out there coming up
36:33and want to be good athletes
36:34and want to get bigger, faster, and stronger.
36:36I really feel great that I can now be truly a role model
36:40and say that if you eat properly,
36:42the proper nutrition,
36:43do the proper training with discipline,
36:45you take the proper supplementation,
36:47that you truly can build and maintain a great physique
36:51and a great athletic build
36:53without the use of antibiotic steroids.
36:56That's a great feeling.
36:57It really is.
37:01We're back.
37:04We are live with Monday Night Raw.
37:06Here comes the Beast from the East.
37:09His schedule for one fall.
37:11And a lovely Luna Vachon.
37:13You honestly believe that Luna is lovely.
37:16Luna Vachon.
37:17They're the greatest-looking couple
37:19I can think of right now.
37:21I believe.
37:22Except for Frank and Cathy.
37:24Which, by the way, happens to be their birthday as well.
37:28His opponent, from Baltimore, Maryland,
37:31weighing 225 pounds, Rich Meyer.
37:35Rich Meyer stepping in the ring against Bam-Bam Bigelow.
37:38Meyer's unquestionably with an uphill battle here.
37:41Bam-Bam!
37:42And again, perhaps you could say the same thing earlier on
37:45for Marty Jannetty,
37:46who pulled off a victory over Bastian Booger.
37:48Exactly.
37:50Especially here on Monday Night Raw,
37:52you never know what's gonna happen.
37:53You see what the 1-2-3 kid has done.
37:55Ooh.
37:56That wasn't ladylike by Luna.
37:58No, that's definitely not.
38:00Oh, my goodness.
38:01How are you?
38:03Aah!
38:04Looks like you'll be a half-hour late for dinner, McMahon,
38:06and her waiting at the doorstep for you.
38:08Thank you, no.
38:09Rich Meyer!
38:10Flex down to the canvas.
38:12Bam-Bam all over Myers.
38:14Bam-Bam, unquestionably,
38:16one of the more gifted athletes in the WWF.
38:19He's so quick for his size.
38:21He moves so fluently.
38:23And quite adaptable, as well,
38:25in terms of tag teams
38:27and notwithstanding his efforts in single competition.
38:29Bam-Bam, of course, as we stated earlier on,
38:32is headed to SummerSlam two weeks from tonight.
38:34Bam-Bam mixing it up
38:36with his partners, the HeadShrinkers,
38:38against, as we said earlier on, Tatanka,
38:40still undefeated as Native American
38:42teaming up with the Smoking Gun.
38:44Yeah, you know, McMahon,
38:45cowboys and Indians have never got along together.
38:47But I can see where Bam-Bam and the HeadShrinkers
38:50are gonna work out just fine.
38:52Look out, Bam-Bam!
38:54Goodness.
38:55I think Bam-Bam's showing off
38:57in front of his main squeeze, Luna.
38:59Yeah.
39:01How long, Bobby?
39:02Yes.
39:03Bam-Bam and Luna been a night.
39:05I understand for quite some time.
39:07Uh, quite a number of years.
39:09Really?
39:10They've just been madly in love.
39:11Well, who wouldn't be?
39:14Beg your pardon?
39:15Who couldn't be in love with Luna?
39:16Look at her.
39:17Beautiful face, beautiful hair,
39:19nice scalp.
39:20Well, I think maybe you've been
39:22watching the sci-fi channel
39:23a little too much, Bobby Leonard.
39:25What, you don't like Luna's look?
39:27Uh, doesn't appeal to me, no.
39:29In a distorted type of way,
39:30are we talking or what?
39:32I like to see veins on a woman's scalp.
39:34You what?
39:35I like to see a nice vein on a woman's scalp.
39:37That's appealing to you?
39:38Put that in a receding hairline
39:39or a widow's peak.
39:40I wouldn't mind a bald spot even.
39:42You know, it'll work.
39:45Are you looking at Bam-Bam, Bobby Heeland?
39:47I guess maybe they call you the weasel
39:49for many more reasons
39:50than I ever thought.
39:51Beauty is in the eye of
39:52the beast from the east.
39:54No question about that.
39:56Bam-Bam Bigelow
39:58destroying Rich Myers.
40:00And where is that surprise,
40:02Randy Savage?
40:03Buddy, you should mention it.
40:05Don't go away, everybody.
40:07Just tie yourself down
40:09because I'm gonna tell you
40:10something that's gonna be
40:11electric when you, uh,
40:13find out exactly what it is.
40:15He made us wait all the way
40:16until you get the...
40:17What do you mean, you're leaving?
40:18I'm gonna get hurt if it's electric.
40:20Uh-oh, yeah, you probably will.
40:22Look at this.
40:23What's Bam-Bam gonna do with Myers?
40:25He hasn't decided yet.
40:27He got bored and just dropped him, I think.
40:30But he landed right on his spine.
40:31Yes.
40:32Well, that'll go right up
40:33into your neck, into your brain.
40:34That really hurts.
40:37Bam-Bam Bigelow
40:38touring around with Rich Myers.
40:40Oh, my, what a slam.
40:42I love the way Luna paces.
40:44You know, she's in bed
40:45every hour and a half.
40:46She paces like that.
40:47Let's not talk about Luna
40:48all the way up to the top now,
40:49ladies and gentlemen.
40:50Bam-Bam Bigelow.
40:52Bam-Bam leaping,
40:53crashing down with a headbutt
40:54into the chest cavity of Myers
40:56across the leg.
40:57And this one.
40:58Great.
40:59Pretty amazing, I must admit.
41:01Bam-Bam.
41:03But only half as amazing
41:05as my surprise.
41:06Bam-Bam Bigelow.
41:07All right.
41:10Luna by Shawn
41:11and Bam-Bam Bigelow.
41:13Kind of tough to picture
41:14those two together, isn't it?
41:15No, not at all.
41:17It's like Ward and Cleaver
41:18in June.
41:21I just can't imagine
41:22them cuddling.
41:23The surprise is coming up.
41:26Promotional consideration
41:27paid for by the following.
41:29Tip!
41:31Ah!
41:32Gotta have beef.
41:33Gotta have spice.
41:34Need a little excitement?
41:36Snap into a Slim Jim.
41:37Oh, yeah.
41:39WWF Royal Rumble
41:40on Super NES.
41:41Incredible 16-meg action.
41:43No holds barred.
41:44It's perfect.
41:45WWF.
41:46Perfect.
41:47WWF Royal Rumble
41:48on Super NES.
41:49Perfect.
41:51Wait a minute.
41:52What is this?
41:54There he is!
41:56Take a look at this!
41:59The Macho Midget!
42:02Take a look!
42:03What a surprise!
42:04All his glory
42:05right there.
42:08And what's behind
42:09the Macho Midget?
42:11A baby of beauty.
42:12Not as good looking
42:13as Luna,
42:14but not too shabby.
42:16Denise
42:17Maria
42:18Catherine
42:19Phoenix!
42:21Bah!
42:22Bah!
42:23Bah!
42:24You know what's the
42:25worst thing about
42:26having a date
42:27with a Macho Midget?
42:28He can't walk
42:29you to the door
42:30after the date
42:31because he can't get
42:32back into his car seat
42:33by himself.
42:34Hey, don't knock him.
42:35He's my better half.
42:38It's your better quarter.
42:40And he's having
42:41another great hair day.
42:43Hey, touch!
42:44And
42:45have a little respect
42:46or don't touch
42:47in the ring, please.
42:50How about that?
42:51The Macho Midget
42:52along with
42:53I suppose
42:54what we're going
42:55to see
42:56a whole family
42:57of beauties here
42:58for Wall Girls.
43:00Surprise!
43:01Surprise!
43:02My goodness.
43:03Thank you very much.
43:04No problem.
43:05I knew you'd like it.
43:06We'll be back
43:07with more
43:08Monthly Night Raw.
43:12All right.
43:13We mentioned
43:14earlier on
43:15about the Summer
43:16Slam spectacular
43:17right here on USA
43:18coming up
43:19Sunday night
43:20at 8 o'clock
43:21Eastern.
43:22Get a load
43:23of this lineup
43:24if you would.
43:25Shawn Michaels
43:26defends
43:27the Intercontinental
43:28Championship
43:29against former
43:30WWF Champion
43:31Bob Backlund.
43:32In addition to that
43:33a special interview
43:34with the one
43:35and the only
43:36The Undertaker.
43:37And then from there
43:38the tag title
43:39up for grabs
43:40as we mentioned
43:41earlier on
43:42against Money
43:43Incorporated.
43:44All that
43:45in addition to
43:46Yokozuna
43:47squaring off
43:48against Hacksaw
43:49Jim Duggan.
43:50My, my.
43:51Oh, that hits
43:52your way
43:53Sunday night
43:548 o'clock
43:55Eastern
43:56right here on USA.