Celebs Go Dating S13E16 (2024)
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00:00Tonight Chris gets his bum out. Can't go in dirty, can you?
00:06Tristan gets called out. Unless you change your behaviour, you will end up sad, single and lonely.
00:12And Ella returns. I'm back, bitches.
00:16Beyond excited to reconnect with Alex. I don't care about anyone else. I'm going to marry this boy.
00:21She has the date of her dreams. Before shit.
00:27Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god.
00:31There's a fine line between avoiding the truth and lying.
00:34I'm not going to be accused of being a liar.
00:36He's back, he's back, he's back.
00:38Oh shit!
00:44Welcome to Celebs Go Dating, where the famous meet Joe and Josephine Public to find love and happiness.
00:51Our agents are in early to discuss yesterday's film night, Garfield the Movie. Classic.
00:56I need more context and understanding of their, like, psychology, like what was going on.
01:01Yes, yes.
01:03He's a talking cat who likes his lasagne, Dr T. It's not that deep.
01:09Anyway, here comes our first celeb, Chelsea Royalty, Trissie Fitts.
01:13Hello, Celebrity Dating Agency.
01:15Hello, Tom. Tristan here.
01:17Oh, hello, you. Come on in.
01:27Come in.
01:29My flaxen Adonis.
01:31I don't know what that means.
01:33Lovely to see you.
01:35You smell nice, you changed your aftershave.
01:37No, no, it's the same.
01:39Has something in here changed? No.
01:41Well, I tell you what, your dipsis has doubled in size.
01:43It always does when I see you, Tom.
01:45So while Triss Fundles is grower, outside and more of a shower is Ella.
01:50Fresh from her sickbed and back on the bend.
01:52I hope she's brought a doctor.
01:54It's Ella.
01:56Oh, Ella.
01:58Come in. I'm back, bitches.
02:10Oh, Ella.
02:12Oh, my God.
02:14You're alive.
02:16Wow, guys, I'm alive.
02:18It's so good to be back.
02:20It's so good to be back.
02:22Being in hospital the last few days has given me some time to think
02:26and I know what I want and I'm going to get it.
02:30A fully funded health care system fit for purpose?
02:32Oh, yeah, I can do that.
02:34Alec sent me flowers.
02:36Cute.
02:38Whilst I was in hospital.
02:40That's so sweet.
02:42I don't care about anyone else. I'm going to marry this boy.
02:44No, no.
02:46Let's walk before we run, but let's walk in the right direction.
02:48Before I shit myself again.
02:50Better stock up on the Imodium, Tom.
02:52We've got a leaky ass on our hands.
02:54Hello.
02:56Hey there, T, if you could send Ella up, please.
02:58Yes. Bye, darling.
03:00Oh, they're ready, Ella.
03:02See you in a bit, guys.
03:04Love you. Bye, bitches.
03:10Is it Princess Ella?
03:12Hi.
03:14Well, it's not Princess, guys.
03:16Good to see you.
03:18I'm really good.
03:20He's just so happy to see you.
03:22How are you?
03:24I am on the road to recovery.
03:26Said the last time that you two saw each other was at the retreat.
03:28The retreat?
03:30Which had more hookups than a high school disco.
03:32Before going to the retreat,
03:34Ella had already locked lips with two lucky lads.
03:36Thank you for the amazing date.
03:38She'd rocked Reese's World twice
03:40and had a cheeky kiss with Sam the Salmon Man.
03:42I'm not explaining that.
03:44Watch out.
03:46Despite not calling it off with either of them,
03:48she started snogging pot-noodle-haired Alex
03:50at the Cotswolds retreat.
03:52Oh, Lord have mercy.
03:54Alex is so funny.
03:56His personality is,
03:58I'd say, actually, on par with mine.
04:00And that's big. That's good.
04:02The first thing that jumps out to me
04:04is you're lit up,
04:06which is good.
04:08I know. I haven't even checked him.
04:10No, I've done nothing. Oh, I did kiss him.
04:12And it felt lovely and it just felt right
04:14even though I'd got something good going on
04:16with Reese and I don't want to rock the boat
04:18and I really wanted to kiss Alex
04:20and I did and then we kissed in the hot tub.
04:22Some feeling going on?
04:24There was heavy patting under the water.
04:26Patting or petting?
04:28This is cool. So, heavy petting,
04:30double-handing under the water.
04:32Double-handing? Oh, no!
04:34Calm down, Pete. We don't all have two dicks like you.
04:36What are you doing?
04:38Basically, I touched his willy and then I told him to go.
04:40We were chuffed about that.
04:42Can we talk about Reese and Sam as well?
04:44So, where are you with Reese right now?
04:46He's a lovely boy
04:48that I felt maybe the sense of humour
04:50was lacking.
04:52What do you think Reese thinks?
04:54He still probably thinks
04:56we're going to go on more dates.
04:58Now, what about Sam?
05:00Basically, it went well.
05:02There wasn't anything bad about it.
05:04It actually did go really well.
05:06But we agreed on a second date
05:08and I did tell him about Reese
05:10and I said, you know, I get on really well with him.
05:14Yeah.
05:16This is very challenging to navigate.
05:18Because I've never been in love before,
05:20a lot of this
05:22is new discoveries for me
05:24and I'm not going to cry.
05:26What you guys have done
05:28for me so far
05:30has completely changed.
05:32A, how I see myself
05:34and B, how I see dating.
05:36But because of my past experiences
05:38I thought, I'm never
05:40going to find somebody.
05:42And to have all these straight
05:44cisgender guys
05:46who just see me for me
05:48and want to be with me and want to spend time with me
05:50is the best thing in the world
05:52that I've never experienced before
05:54because it's always been like, we just want Ella for sex.
05:56So to have the choice
05:58of men, I've never
06:00experienced this in my life.
06:02I'm quite proud of myself
06:04I'm a really good friend.
06:06Ella.
06:10We're so proud of you.
06:12I love how Ella has grown.
06:14She's come on leaps and bounds
06:16and even found herself an authentic connection.
06:18So,
06:20you are going on a date
06:22with Alex.
06:24And it will be tonight.
06:26Oh my god.
06:28I'm so excited.
06:30This is a very important date.
06:32This is where the conversation is a bit deeper.
06:34Do we want the same things out of life?
06:36I'd like children.
06:38But it's obviously very difficult
06:40as a trans person to have children.
06:42And I do remember him saying,
06:44because he already has a son,
06:46I don't want any more kids.
06:48And the one thing that I am very
06:50certain on
06:52is I know I want children.
06:54There you go.
06:56Actually, I do need to mention it tonight.
06:58Yeah.
07:00I'm so nervous now.
07:02You've got to get all the requirements out of the way.
07:04Have fun.
07:06Gather the information you need, okay?
07:08I'll let you know how it goes.
07:10It's okay. Enjoy it.
07:14Bye.
07:16That's the sexual power of the Brundog.
07:18What a guy.
07:20And not to miss out on the goss,
07:22the Brundog and tease scuttle straight over
07:24to Anna to offload.
07:26Hello.
07:28Well, yes, always.
07:30That was such an amazing session.
07:32Ella is back,
07:34and she's just grown so much.
07:36Absolutely, but we have a big issue.
07:38Ella has three
07:40gentlemen.
07:42And on top of it, she missed brunch.
07:44So she missed stick or twist.
07:46And you can't skip brunch.
07:48You cannot.
07:50We're bringing brunch to you.
07:52As much as we're proud
07:54of Ella's growth and new excitement,
07:56she does need to be accountable for her decisions
07:58and tackle them face-on.
08:00It's only fair to both
08:02Reese and Sam.
08:04I think I'm gonna go down tonight.
08:06With Reese. With Sam.
08:08And put
08:10Ella on the spot.
08:12Oh, pee, you devious dog.
08:14Can't wait to see what you've got in store for Trissie Phipps.
08:16Hello?
08:18Yes, he's here.
08:20All right. Bye, darling.
08:22Time to go to the headmaster's office.
08:24Keep your pecker up.
08:26Mwah.
08:28See ya.
08:30Blimey, the agents are non-stop
08:32this morning.
08:34Do you feel like Tristan, does he flirt with you?
08:36I think Tristan's just go-to
08:38is charming, flirty gentlemen.
08:40I don't even think there's an off switch.
08:42And this, I really now feel like
08:44it's getting him into some real trouble.
08:46Look out, Casanova, these two are coming for ya.
08:48I can't start blaming
08:50really, as at the last brunch,
08:52this heartbreaking hunk.
08:54I can't see myself romantically
08:56with either of you.
08:58Went totally off menu.
09:00None of the ladies.
09:02Double wig and hold the sausage.
09:04I think we're curious to know, P and I,
09:06what mood are you in today?
09:08I am in a reflective,
09:10absorbing mood today.
09:12I just feel a bit confused.
09:14I'll be honest, Triss,
09:16we were confused too.
09:18You are really a good guy.
09:20But you use
09:22the skills that you have
09:24not always for good.
09:26You're not a dick, but your behavior can be dickish.
09:28That's being a dick, isn't it?
09:30And the problem that we have
09:32is that you are
09:34leaving women now in your trail.
09:36And I think you will continue to.
09:38We've seen with you, there is this modus operandi.
09:40Oh, long words, Anna!
09:42Which is
09:44straight in Tristan the charmer.
09:46I think unless you change your behavior,
09:48you're going to end up sad, single and lonely.
09:50Yeah, you don't want to be there, mate.
09:52First 28 years of my life.
09:54Three things I'm not looking for.
09:56Right.
09:58Tristan is an insatiable flirt
10:00with pretty much every girl he meets.
10:02But it really does not do him any favors.
10:04He needs to understand that his actions
10:06do have consequences,
10:08and they're not always positive.
10:10Flirting is communicating with romantic intent.
10:12Okay.
10:14So it is not just about your intent,
10:16but it is about the interpretation
10:18of the person that you're communicating with.
10:20What is it that they could be thinking
10:22based on my behavior?
10:24Yeah.
10:26And then how can I modify that
10:28so that it's very clear
10:30that I have no interest in them?
10:32There's going to be a hundred women
10:34that you're physically attracted to,
10:36but you can't be with all 100 women.
10:38You want one.
10:40Right.
10:42One really nice one.
10:44A teammate.
10:46Number one cheerleader.
10:48Just someone you can share everything with.
10:50Okay.
10:52And truly be yourself.
10:54No bullshit.
10:56Okay.
10:58No facade.
11:00No facade.
11:02We have a wonderful lady
11:04who we think would be a really,
11:06really lovely date.
11:08I feel, like, a bit skeptical
11:10to meet someone new right now.
11:12She is a pageant movement coach
11:14from London.
11:16Would you like to hear from her?
11:18Yeah, absolutely.
11:20Hi, I'm Afton,
11:22and I'm looking for someone
11:24who likes to keep active,
11:26have fun, and be spontaneous
11:28and who I can also get stretchy with.
11:30Stretchy.
11:32That's very flirty.
11:34She sounds lovely.
11:36She sounds really nice.
11:38She's lovely.
11:40Okay.
11:42I think this is a good opportunity
11:44to take your advice and see where it goes.
11:46Okay.
11:48You need to go on to this date
11:50and not be overtly flirtatious.
11:52Oh, leave it out, Paul.
11:54You're sending him off to meet Miss Stretchy Pageant Queen.
11:56Instead, go in and say,
11:58you know what, this is a friend.
12:00Okay.
12:02There's nothing more, nothing less.
12:04Right.
12:08Take care.
12:10See you soon, Afton.
12:12Cheers, guys.
12:14Bye, darling. Bye, baby.
12:16I actually think
12:18this could be a real turning point in his life.
12:20If he really does
12:22stick with what we're telling him,
12:24this could transform him.
12:26Yeah.
12:28Or he could end up with a double hernia
12:30from banging Stretchy McStretcherson.
12:32Coming up, Chris reveals his technique.
12:34Don't have to go, like,
12:36bottom of the iceberg, straight up.
12:38You can just ease it in,
12:40buying stuff for gentlemen.
12:42Lauren Wells up.
12:44And Ella's in for a shock.
12:46Oh, my God.
12:48Oh, my God.
12:50Oh, my God.
13:00Welcome back to Celebs Go Dating.
13:02We've hot-footed it down
13:04to Stephen's salon in Brighton
13:06where he's dishing the dirt on his love life.
13:08Dave is the one that's kind of
13:10hit the spot.
13:12He's probably got the old...
13:14This is the one that you sent me the picture.
13:16He's really fit, him.
13:18I know. I was like...
13:22I did go in for a snog
13:24because I thought, you will tell by snog
13:26there's a tingle in your winger.
13:28Oh, I got that when Lou bought that mint shower gel.
13:30It was like an hamster was hanging off the end of it.
13:32He's a great kisser. He's biting me bottom lip.
13:34Stop it!
13:36He's a bit of me.
13:38I've got another date with him
13:40this week.
13:42I would like to go and do something active with him.
13:44In Brighton?
13:46In bed.
13:48No, in Brighton.
13:50Whilst we leave Stephen pretending to cut that lady's hair,
13:54we have another famous hottie
13:56arriving at the agency in full
13:58incognito mode.
14:00I think it's new recruit, Liza G.
14:02Hey, it's Lauren.
14:04Yeah, I was right. Case closed.
14:16So now it's her turn to get a grilling
14:18from Dr. T and the Brunson.
14:20They look like they're about to break into a duet
14:22in that matching monochrome.
14:24Hello, beautiful.
14:26Hi.
14:28That's a cool outfit.
14:30Matching.
14:32Hello, honey.
14:36I'm not in the same vibe as you guys.
14:38Too beige for this crew.
14:40How was brunch for you?
14:42You guys really like the deep end, don't you?
14:44If by deep end, you mean the end of a humongous man mountain.
14:46I'm Mark.
14:48I'm Lauren. Nice to meet you.
14:50How tall are you?
14:526'6".
14:54I'm 5'1.5".
14:56She didn't exactly ignite her senses.
14:58I feel just as nervous as probably you do.
15:00I shouldn't need to feel nervous.
15:02You look great. Look at you.
15:04She decided he was the hotter
15:06of her two options.
15:08I think I'm going to twist and try another date
15:10with Mark.
15:12You chose Mark. Are you excited?
15:14No.
15:16Not ideal.
15:18He was super nice, but it's the confidence thing
15:20as well, but maybe in time that would grow.
15:22So the confidence was lacking.
15:24That's fair. So it sounds like you have no interest
15:26in seeing Mark again.
15:28No, not really, if I'm going to be honest.
15:30If you're not going to go on a date
15:32with Mark, you have to tell him.
15:34I'd make her do it right now.
15:36I'm just going to call him right here.
15:38Great minds.
15:40I'm going to hand it to you.
15:42The best thing to do, Lauren, I see, is we just need to rip the bed off.
15:44Can you just let me think?
15:46I need to think. I don't even know what I want to say.
15:48Hey, love.
15:50This is not for me.
15:52I don't want to do this.
15:54You've got the pillow.
15:56You can do this. Come on.
15:58Hi, is that Mark?
16:00Hi, yes, hi.
16:02Hi, Mark, it's Lauren. How are you?
16:04I'm good, thanks. How are you?
16:06I'm good, thank you. Basically,
16:08you know, I did go on with you.
16:10I just wanted to experience something where maybe
16:12someone might have a bit more confidence,
16:14bring it out of me a bit more,
16:16and I just wanted to have that conversation
16:18with you to be upfront and honest.
16:20Of course it is.
16:22It's OK. You want to do what's best for yourself,
16:24don't you? You need to go out there
16:26and see what's best for you, so I totally understand.
16:28OK. Well, it was nice talking to you.
16:30Yeah, you too.
16:32Take care. Bye-bye.
16:34Oh, he's a nice guy, isn't he? Lost out a diamond there, Lozza.
16:36Good job.
16:38Just like that. Easy.
16:40Yeah, but he made it feel easier
16:42because of his response. He could have been a dick.
16:44But when you deliver that to someone who's not kind,
16:46they're going to give it to you back
16:48frashly, but someone who's kind is going to be
16:50respectful and appreciative.
16:52Yeah. I have a feeling in the past
16:54you perhaps have shared
16:56honest opinions and
16:58emotions about situations
17:00and did not get a respectful
17:02response. Is that true?
17:04Um...
17:06Oh, it's going to
17:08make me cry.
17:10It's OK, Lauren. We're always here for you.
17:12We would never judge you for crying.
17:14You purge, girl.
17:16I'm used to it being my fault
17:18all the time and...
17:22You speak to someone like that.
17:24Like a mark.
17:26I'm just not used to it.
17:28I'm just not used to that.
17:30But I think that's the beauty of you being here
17:32at the agency now is that we're
17:34trying to place you in environments that are
17:36safe and that are secure.
17:38Because there's a lot
17:40going on.
17:42There's a lot in the press.
17:44There's a lot in the press quite a bit.
17:52Um...
17:54I think people forget that, like,
17:56my only
17:58priority
18:00are my children, you know?
18:02It's very... It's heavy.
18:04Really heavy on just, like,
18:06your energy levels.
18:08I feel drained.
18:10I just feel like I'm constantly
18:12going to war for my kids.
18:14And it's just... I'm just so sick of
18:16the battle.
18:20It's just a battle. It's just a struggle.
18:22I can see it
18:24in your eyes, how much pain
18:26you're carrying.
18:28As a parent, I can tell you that
18:30the best gift that
18:32we can give our children
18:34is our wellbeing.
18:36Lauren is obviously carrying
18:38the weight of the world on her shoulders
18:40at the moment. She's a fighter.
18:42And I applaud her strength and courage.
18:44But Lauren needs to learn to love
18:46herself first before she
18:48can love anyone else.
18:50You have to take care of you.
18:52We have to find things that bring you joy.
18:54You are on a dating journey.
18:56But we know that the journey always
18:58begins, and quite honestly, is
19:00truly all about self.
19:02So we're not going to
19:04set you up on a date immediately.
19:06But leave it with us in terms
19:08of your next steps, okay?
19:10Oh, bless you, Lauren.
19:16Over the other
19:18side of London, Jamilia's heading to her
19:20first ever second date with teacher
19:22and semi-pro footballer, Ozzy.
19:24It was squeaky bum time
19:26for Jammie at their last brunch.
19:28Oh my goodness.
19:30She sacked off Vin Diesel look-alike Nathan
19:32and DJ Kezman, Hulk Tate.
19:34But Ozzy's cheeky confidence
19:36bagged him that all-important date number two.
19:38I absolutely would like to go on a second date
19:40with him.
19:42So the agents have
19:44set Jamilia and Ozzy up for a pizza-making
19:46and hopefully love-making
19:48second date. I'm looking forward to
19:50seeing Ozzy again. I had a good time with him last
19:52time. I'm quite excited about my
19:54first second date. I'm looking forward to it.
19:56We're going to be doing some pizza-making.
19:58Cooking-based activity is right
20:00up my street. As you may or may not
20:02know, I am a MasterChef finalist
20:04and therefore very confident
20:06in the kitchen and made the best
20:08pizza my pizza wins.
20:10Calm down, Chicago town.
20:12I've noticed no pineapple.
20:16It's just not so traditional.
20:18We just remove them. Fair enough.
20:20I will respect your
20:22traditions.
20:24And here comes her pizza date now.
20:26Papa John! Not really.
20:28It's Ozzy. I feel really good to be
20:30the first person to go on a second date with Jamilia.
20:32We're in a nice little vibe
20:34because we kind of know one another a little
20:36bit better. So I think a second date
20:38can only be better than the first date.
20:40I want to prove to her that she's
20:42made the right decision in choosing me today.
20:44If you've got a pineapple with you,
20:46you might be in luck.
20:48Oh!
20:52I'm good, thank you.
20:54You look amazing as usual. Thank you.
20:56So Ozzy looks nice, but let's see if his pizza-making
20:58skills are up to scratch because
21:00I've got high standards, you know.
21:02Have you made pizza before? Of course. Oh, have you?
21:04Maybe he is Papa John.
21:06You make pizza every day? Well, not every day,
21:08but at least once a week. Really?
21:10Nah, I'm joking. Really weird joke, Ozzy.
21:12I actually believed you.
21:16OK.
21:20So you said you make
21:22pizza at home? Yeah. OK.
21:24And how do you cook it? In a baking tray?
21:26Yeah, baking tray.
21:28I don't believe a word of it.
21:30And it's a red flag how easily you're lying.
21:32Oh, I see. Yeah, it's OK.
21:34Go ahead.
21:36I think we can see quite clearly which one's the better pizza.
21:38It almost looks like it's flooded
21:40in cheese. It looks stunning.
21:42So what does mine look like, then?
21:44It looks like a child made it.
21:46Don't hold back, Jay.
21:48Chef, where is that? Where, where?
21:52Right, that's... OK, this is...
21:54That is not OK.
21:56Chef's tactics, typical footballer.
21:58Semi-pro. Why are you trying to sabotage
22:00my pizza? Are you not confident
22:02in your own pizza-making ability?
22:04Honestly, I don't know what you're talking about.
22:06Wow, I can't believe you did that.
22:08So now we're gonna wait.
22:10This usually takes around
22:1260 to 90 seconds. Ozzy!
22:14What are you doing?
22:16What?
22:18Everyone is spoiling my pizza!
22:20You don't get this at MasterChef.
22:22It'll be rolling on the floor, crunching his shins, Dex.
22:24This is disgusting work!
22:26Nasty work!
22:28No, this is really awful.
22:32I haven't done anything.
22:34Is this his idea of banter?
22:36I am very competitive,
22:38so if he thinks sabotaging my pizza
22:40is a way to get me,
22:42he doesn't know me at all.
22:44Cut down there.
22:46One shot.
22:48Oh, jeez!
22:50I think you had that coming, mate.
22:52That should have been really good.
22:54It's about how it tastes, though.
22:56I genuinely hope your pizza tastes great.
22:58I'm worried that mine isn't going to
23:00because it's been sabotaged
23:02on many occasions.
23:04Well, it might be 400 degrees in that pizza oven,
23:06but out here it's pretty icy.
23:08Do you know what?
23:10You are cancelled.
23:12Coming up!
23:14Jamilia turns on the charm with Ozzy.
23:16The ease at which you lie is really awful.
23:18Kinda.
23:20Chris finally goes deep.
23:22I'm proud of you.
23:24And I'm not talking balls.
23:26And Rhys returns for a three-way.
23:28He's back.
23:30Hashtag Orcs.
23:40Welcome back to Celebs Go Dating.
23:46Where Chris is in fine voice
23:48and Lou.
23:50That reminds me to tan my arse
23:52next time I'm on holiday.
23:54Horrible little chicken fillets.
23:56It's not going dirty, can you?
23:58That comes later.
24:00Not if you forget to take your nan's
24:02shower cap off, it don't.
24:04I would say I fancy Lou, yeah.
24:06I do like the tattoos.
24:08She's quite quirky.
24:10I like her emo.
24:12I thought they were extinct,
24:14but turns out they're not.
24:16Chris picked Lou at the last brunch.
24:18I actually, like, get told
24:20that I look like Peter Parker.
24:22I get that.
24:24And he's also my favourite Marvel character.
24:26He's my favourite Marvel character.
24:28I've never agreed with anyone on anything more.
24:30Looking to see if there's, like, a little bit
24:32of depth there, as Paul
24:34will get upset with me
24:36if I don't do that.
24:38And you don't have to go, like,
24:40full Bottom of the Iceberg vibe straight up.
24:42You can just ease it in inch by inch like a gentleman.
24:44That does sound gentle, to be fair.
24:46I wouldn't mind it, actually.
24:48Back in London,
24:50Jamilia's on a pizza-making date
24:52with semi-pro footballer Ozzy.
24:54I wonder if she'll get to see his floppy Giuseppe.
24:56Is this how you used to, like,
24:58play Paul?
25:00Did you play dirty? Cheat?
25:02Sabotage?
25:04You've got to do what you've got to do to win, I guess.
25:06Oh, Jammie's still going on about the Osmeister
25:08sprinkling flour on her pizza.
25:10You're not honest.
25:12I like honest people.
25:14I didn't put it there in the first place, so...
25:16Do you know that the ease at which you
25:18lie is really awful?
25:20That's an awful trait to have.
25:22Blimey, Jams, this ought to be party gated.
25:24I was just giving you, like, cheeky vibes with me.
25:26Cheeky, sad, like...
25:28It wasn't, like...
25:30You and I both knew that I did it as well.
25:32It was sensational lying. You were very convincing.
25:34Shall I tell you what it is, right?
25:36You told me that you're a footballer.
25:38Yeah, part-time, but yeah, come on.
25:40I'm a footballer. I know what they're like.
25:42I know what their life's like.
25:44That's what I don't like.
25:46No, no, no.
25:48What I don't like is when, you know,
25:50you judge one person
25:52with another person.
25:54I hate that.
25:56Should I say, like, all singers,
25:58they can't make pizzas, like...
26:00No, that is not true.
26:02I know at least two S Club juniors
26:04who now work a pizza hut.
26:06All right, shall we get out of here?
26:08Ay-yi-yi.
26:10My second date with Jamila today
26:12went really well. You think?
26:14Well, thank you for a lovely date.
26:16Another one. Yes.
26:18I'll see you soon. Maybe.
26:20Maybe. Maybe.
26:22Thank you. Bye.
26:24Jamila definitely did give me a hard time
26:26for adding a little bit of sauce
26:28to a pizza.
26:30Yeah, I think I'm not going to do that next time
26:32if I do get a third date.
26:34You've got to admire his confidence.
26:36I feel like we've left things quite open.
26:38I'm still not, like, 100%
26:40on whether or not I want to see him again,
26:42but I've left it open
26:44because I might.
26:46Treat him mean
26:48and keep him keen, eh, Jammie?
26:52Meanwhile, across town,
26:54Lou's on her way to her date with Chris.
26:56What's this? Take that. What's the angle here?
26:58Me and Chris
27:00didn't really get to spend a lot of time together
27:02last time, so I'm kind of really excited
27:04to get to know him on a kind of deeper level.
27:06I wouldn't hold your breath.
27:08Let's see if I can work my magic on him.
27:10I get it. Magic.
27:12They're at one of those wizardy-themed cocktail
27:14bars. Well, let's hope Lou can
27:16brew up a love potion for our Chris.
27:18Love, take that.
27:20Things got bum-clenchingly awkward at the last
27:22brunch when new girl Lou met Chris's
27:24old flame, Jada. How was
27:26your date? Obviously, we had, like,
27:28a two-day kind of thing.
27:30It was, like, quite intense. So let's call it
27:32what it is. You two had sex. Yeah, we did.
27:34I really enjoy getting
27:36to know you a lot, and I think we have a lot
27:38in common. The curveball
27:40is that you also match
27:42the freak. So what I
27:44would like to do
27:46is go on a date with Lou.
27:48I'm really sorry. It's all right. It is what it is.
27:50Well,
27:52here he comes now, dressed
27:54as a plumber. I would not pay him 90
27:56quid to unblock me pipes. I picked Lou at a
27:58brunch because I felt a little bit like, you know,
28:00when you turn the hob on and there's that
28:02t-t-t-t. I felt like that
28:04was there, but it hadn't ignited
28:06yet. Actually, it does sound corky
28:08registered. Fair play.
28:10I mean, if the date goes well, there might
28:12be a scenario whereby she's playing
28:14with more than one wand.
28:16But we'll have to find out.
28:18Oh, I love a cryptic innuendo.
28:20Don't tell me, don't tell me. He wants her to
28:22touch his cock. Respect.
28:24Hello.
28:26How you doing? You all right?
28:28I thought you'd be wearing black.
28:30Well, I should have done for this, but... It's interesting.
28:32I thought you'd have nothing but black in your wardrobe.
28:34I like to shop. I assumed
28:36Lou would be dressed for a funeral.
28:38She's actually gone goth girl next door.
28:40Which I quite like. This could be interesting.
28:42What are we having? Have a look.
28:44What would you like? Oh.
28:46Should we get, um...
28:48Hold up, who invited Tom Allen?
28:50Welcome to the cauldron. I see you've found the drinks
28:52when you're ready. We have found it, yeah.
28:54I think we're going to go for three witches.
28:56Good choice. And then we'll have some bubbling
28:58shots of death. OK. Brilliant.
29:00Cool. OK. Thank you, sir.
29:02Cheers, mate. I'd have gone for two Diet Cokes just to
29:04wind up the wizard waiter.
29:06Nice to see you, though, Tom. How are you feeling after the brunch?
29:08Interesting.
29:10Got a bit twisted, didn't it?
29:12Do you think you made the right decision? Yeah.
29:14Yeah? See, that was quick.
29:16I know. Why?
29:18Why? I basically... Oh, would you like a compliment, would you?
29:20Er... OK.
29:22Go on. There's not many people that
29:24I've kind of, like, been on a wavelength
29:26with this entire time, so...
29:28I felt there could be that there.
29:30Yeah. So I thought, let's explore that.
29:32And let's face it, you didn't have very long.
29:34Yeah. I usually feel like, with anyone else,
29:36like, I'm just talking to a wall, but I feel like
29:38we were just... We were vibing.
29:40Just pure vibes, innit? Pure nerdy vibes and that.
29:42How you going, guys? Hi.
29:44Every good wizard needs a cape.
29:46I bet they stink of Warhammer virgins.
29:48Of course. More layers, thank you.
29:50And, of course, a wand.
29:52Oh. Here we go. Action time.
29:54What's the length on it? The length?
29:56Describe the shaft. Sorry?
29:58Enough. Enough.
30:00Whilst we leave Chris contemplating whether the size
30:02of your wand will make you a better wizard...
30:08..across town, oh, we've got big bass,
30:10big hair and a big strut. It's a sexy hobbit.
30:12That's right. It's time for
30:14Single Dad Alex's date with Ella.
30:16I'm really excited
30:18to have some one-on-one time with Ella.
30:20We haven't had the chance to sit
30:22in front of each other and find out more about each other.
30:24You had the chance to throw a shirt on.
30:26Oh, come on, mate. A fucking vest.
30:28Oh, thank you. Thank you very much.
30:30Thank you very much. Straight on the cocky
30:32T's, not messing about.
30:36I know what I want,
30:38know what I'm after. The head
30:40is in the right space.
30:44I am genuinely nervous
30:46to see Alex. I really do
30:48have high hopes for this.
30:50Hello.
30:52How are you?
30:54Oh, it's so nice to see you.
30:56How you doing?
30:58Blimey, strong start.
31:00I'm so excited to see
31:02Alex and that Pop Noodle mark.
31:04And he's just swept me off my feet.
31:06I've never been so excited to
31:08go on a date with someone in my life. That's so lovely.
31:10And I've also never been so nervous.
31:12And I'm like, I want to refrain from being
31:14too flung because I don't want to put you off.
31:16But at the same time, I can't help.
31:18You know what I'm like. I have no filter.
31:20Yeah, that's what I like best about you.
31:22But that doesn't put you off that I'm
31:24so blunt and honest.
31:28Not yet. Give it time.
31:30We don't know each other that well and I'm already
31:32telling you how keen I am. That surely
31:34is enough to be like, what the hell?
31:36I'm acting like a schoolgirl
31:38giddy with a crush.
31:40I've been told by the agents I've got
31:42to tell Alex about me wanting
31:44to have kids. Somehow
31:46I've got to tell him because it is
31:48so important to me. All I know
31:50is that I do like you and I can see
31:52something happening. I haven't had
31:54that with anyone else.
31:56But it's so hard to meet a guy
31:58when I've gone through what I've gone through
32:00who A, accepts me
32:02and everything, the baggage that
32:04I come with. And then B, who's
32:06also open-minded to being with someone who can't
32:08just get pregnant and have a kid.
32:10So for me, it's actually easier to date someone who's
32:12got a kid, but a lot of times they don't
32:14want any more kids.
32:16If that's the only red flag about me right now,
32:18I will take that.
32:20Yeah. I'm hoping that you
32:22would. I'm hoping that you would.
32:24Want more kids?
32:26You don't want any more
32:28kids, do you?
32:30For my first thing, I was like, oh, blimey, no.
32:32I don't think I'd have kids again.
32:34But I think
32:36if you've found the right person, obviously.
32:38Yeah.
32:40I just want to suck your face off.
32:42In it.
32:44In it?
32:46Yeah.
32:48What?
32:54Oh, you're so amazing.
32:58Sorry to interrupt. Your table is
33:00ready upstairs. Oh, thank you.
33:02You all right there? Do you want me to, like,
33:04carry this out? No, I am...
33:06You got this? Enjoy the walk, guys.
33:08After you, babe.
33:10Because the Brunsonators
33:12are about to rain down a
33:14shitstorm of epic proportions on
33:16your day. Oh, my God.
33:18Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
33:20OMG, indeed. Coming up!
33:22The accusations fly.
33:24I mean, there's a fine line between avoiding
33:26the truth and lying. I'm not going to be
33:28accused of being a liar, because one thing
33:30I am not is a liar. And
33:32Reece books a return ticket.
33:34He's back. He's back.
33:38He's back.
33:44Welcome back to Celebs Go Dating,
33:46where Ella's in for the shock of her life
33:48as her romantic date with Alex is about
33:50to get ruined by the Brundog,
33:52who's lying in wait with two of her exes.
33:54As Ella
33:56missed the last brunch, it's only fair
33:58that she wraps up some loose ends with
34:00Reece and Sam. The other celebs had to do it.
34:02We don't want her to miss out, do we?
34:04Oh.
34:06Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
34:08Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
34:10This way.
34:12Hi.
34:14Ella, what's up?
34:16Oh, I never
34:18thought I'd say this, but what the hell are you doing
34:20here? You have a seat right here.
34:22OK. OK.
34:24So, let me explain
34:26what's happening. This has gone from
34:28the best date ever to my
34:30worst nightmare.
34:32Ella, let me tell you, you are the queen
34:34of unfinished business.
34:36So I thought we should
34:38finish the business right
34:40now. We should
34:42resolve who you're
34:44going to go on a date with
34:46next. Paul,
34:48fuck off. What a way to
34:50completely ruin my date with
34:52Alex by airing my dirty laundry.
34:54You definitely seem nervous.
34:56Mm-hm. Why are you so nervous?
34:58Cos I'm into
35:00Ella.
35:02Yeah.
35:04Was there a physical connection as well, you think?
35:06I think so, yeah. All right.
35:08Any kissing?
35:10Yeah.
35:14Do you see a future
35:16between you and Ella?
35:18Yeah, I think so, yeah.
35:20Yeah.
35:22Yeah.
35:28Let's go to my man, Sam.
35:30Oh, funeral director Sam's back.
35:32Nice to see you again.
35:34Sam, could you share
35:36your opinion on the date with Ella?
35:38It's probably one of the best dates I've ever been on.
35:40The period of time that we spent, we were there for
35:42hours. The best date
35:44he's ever been on was with you.
35:46He does work at a funeral parlour,
35:48so he was just happy someone spoke back, to be fair.
35:50Aw, thank you.
35:52Can I go to my man, Rhys?
35:56Yes.
35:58Rhys and I have history.
36:00Before we carry on, I know you've been
36:02ill recently, so...
36:10Thank you. That is really sweet.
36:12Tell you what, you can call him Rhys
36:14to remind you of the most awkward date of your entire life.
36:16Out of the agency and in the agency,
36:18we've spent a lot of time together.
36:20I feel like we've made a connection.
36:22I mean,
36:24we've spoken about moving forward and things like that,
36:26but I suppose we'll just have to see where it goes.
36:28You've also spent time outside of the agency.
36:30Twice.
36:32So, in that exchange,
36:34did you tell Rhys anything about Alex?
36:38I talked about the retreat,
36:40and I said there wasn't
36:42many guys there,
36:44but there was one guy, so yeah, I did.
36:46I did say there was one guy, Alex,
36:48that I did get on with.
36:50I didn't mention the fact I kissed Alex.
36:52No, you didn't.
36:54I mean, there's a fine line
36:56between avoiding the truth and lying.
37:00Do you know what it was?
37:02I'll be 100% honest.
37:04I'm not used to this.
37:06It's usually me begging guys for attention.
37:08To have three guys that really like me
37:10is an amazing feeling to have, but one that I don't experience.
37:12And I thought, OK,
37:14I felt very safe and comfortable
37:16with you, Rhys, where I just
37:18felt like if I didn't
37:20find anybody else, and this is going to sound really
37:22horrible, and I don't mean it to be,
37:24but I just felt like I felt comfortable
37:26with you, so I knew if I didn't find anybody
37:28else, or there wasn't anybody there...
37:30So I was a safe option?
37:32Yeah.
37:34You were.
37:38Save yourself, cuddly Rhys.
37:40Things are going downhill fast.
37:44Across town
37:46at the wizardy cocktail bar, it's all winged
37:48bat and toe of new, as Chris and Lou
37:50are trying to brew up the potion for
37:52romance. Three sambucas and a
37:54fumble. Oh, wow. Oh, my God.
37:56I feel like this is going to repeat on me.
37:58That's not very sexy, but...
38:00I tend to avoid consuming green, smoking,
38:02bubbling liquids, but knock yourself out.
38:04It's doing queefs.
38:06This might be the best day of my life.
38:08I'm going to take it. It's not that, it's me.
38:10Cheers to effervescent
38:12green juices, or as it's also
38:14known, gonorrhea.
38:16Respect.
38:20All right, yeah, palatable.
38:22Waffle chat's quite
38:24easy with Lou, we're just waffling away,
38:26but I know I've got to go
38:28deeper.
38:30I just hate it.
38:32Tell me something
38:34that you would be generally uncomfortable
38:36with telling someone else, but deep.
38:38OK, I
38:40used to
38:42have really, really, really, really
38:44bad anxiety, social anxiety.
38:48And I
38:50have
38:52since gotten over it
38:54through doing loads of
38:56random TV stuff and pushing
38:58myself outside of my comfort zone.
39:00And now
39:02I think I can be
39:04myself.
39:06I'm proud of you. I'm glad you said that as well.
39:08Cheers.
39:10To heli-anxiety.
39:12I mean, it's
39:14not my favourite type of going deep, but
39:16all in all, it wasn't that
39:18bad. This has been really fun.
39:20I've enjoyed it. Can I
39:22pay for that, please, good sir?
39:24So, date over, but is Chris
39:26going to stick with Jada or roll the dice
39:28of love with Lou?
39:30Question. Do you kiss on a first
39:32date? Well, technically it's a second date. Do you kiss on a second date?
39:34Not usually, but
39:36magic's happened, so let's go for it.
39:38You're going to make an exception.
39:46Right, I'm going that way.
39:48Sit back down.
39:52How do you walk past the camera nurse in a semi?
39:54It's not cool. I normally just do my
39:56shoelaces up until it subsides.
39:58I'm kind of unsure with
40:00what is left between me and
40:02Chris. I would really like another day
40:04to be able to kind of just move
40:06forward with the stuff that we were talking about and then
40:08carry on trying to crack his layers.
40:10I had a bloody lovely date. It was magical.
40:12I left things pretty open with Lou.
40:14I'm in a tough position now because
40:16there's two girls I like and I don't
40:18know which one to go on a date with.
40:20My head's absolutely
40:22pickled. I need to go home and have a little
40:24think about it and make some decisions.
40:26So while Chris goes off to wrestle
40:28that age-old hot guy problem of
40:30hot girl one or hot girl two,
40:33back in the gladiator arena
40:35maybe things have calmed down a bit.
40:37I didn't really talk about it much at all.
40:39I said that I'd met someone called Alex
40:41and I'm not going to be accused of being a liar
40:43because one thing I'm not is a liar.
40:45My mistake, it's got worse.
40:47Brace yourself, cuddly Reece.
40:49Okay, so you met someone called Alex
40:51who you weren't really interested in.
40:53No, I never said I wasn't interested.
40:55I just didn't go into detail.
40:57I didn't go into detail.
40:59Reece, let's be honest, your ego
41:01has been bruised because I projected you
41:03a few times now. Sam, you're lovely.
41:05You were lovely.
41:07The guy that I want to walk away from
41:09that I genuinely see a future here with
41:11is Alex.
41:13Dude, dude, dude, chill, chill.
41:15So just for us
41:17to finish the business,
41:19would you like to see Alex again
41:21or would you like to see Reece again?
41:23Sam,
41:25thank you very much. You've been so respectful.
41:27I genuinely did
41:29at one point.
41:31Please hear me out, Reece.
41:33Honestly, between me and you,
41:35I didn't want to hear it.
41:37The person
41:39I genuinely see a future with
41:41who has everything I've asked for
41:43since I've come to this agency
41:45is Alex.
41:47So Alex,
41:49would you like to see Ella again?
41:51Don't you fucking dare
41:53say no now, poodlehead.
41:55I would love to,
41:57obviously.
41:59Oh my God, I thought you were going to say no.
42:01Of course I would, my darling. I'm sorry, lads.
42:03Don't worry.
42:05No, honestly.
42:07Fellas, let's leave these two.
42:09Alex, it's a pleasure meeting you, mate.
42:11All the best.
42:13I'll see you at the agency.
42:15Come on, I love you.
42:17Paul, you know I love you,
42:19but this is all too much right now.
42:21I need time to process this.
42:23Fucking hell.
42:25This shit can go, honestly.
42:27So cuddly Rhys goes the same way
42:29as real Rhys, tossed out.
42:31He's safer under that chair, to be honest.
42:33Oh, that was rubbish.
42:35What I didn't want to happen
42:37was for that boy
42:39to ruin anything that would happen with us.
42:41And that's why I was like,
42:43there was no Alex.
42:45You don't have to explain anything to me.
42:47You literally don't have to explain anything to me.
42:49That was mental.
42:51He's back, he's back, he's back.
42:53Holy fuck, he's like the Terminator.
42:57Anyway, I just wanted to say
42:59I don't want the things to be left on bad terms.
43:01So I am happy for you two.
43:03Well done, congratulations.
43:05I'm glad you've finally met someone
43:07that you really like.
43:09So you want to have a conversation now,
43:11be civil.
43:13I'd like to have a conversation
43:15without Alex being present.
43:17What the fuck?
43:19What the fuck?
43:21Rhys is relentless.
43:23I mean, as much as I don't really want to,
43:25I guess I probably do need to hear him out.
43:27Can you give us
43:29actually five minutes?
43:31Yeah.
43:33Just so you know,
43:35I didn't want any of that to happen.
43:37No, well...
43:39Did I think that there was a connection with us?
43:41You rang me up and told me on the phone
43:43that he was nothing special.
43:45You lied.
43:47Oh, for the guy that I would think,
43:49oh, I really like another guy.
43:51You have no problem dumping me after the first date,
43:53after we slept together, but you have a problem
43:55with telling me the truth about an agent.
43:57Yeah, because I got to know you more since then.
43:59Look, see,
44:01I don't really give a shit to Rhys.
44:03I really don't care about this.
44:05I stood by you and you threw it down the drain.
44:07So I hope all you and Mr Alex
44:09is amazing.
44:11You don't need the...
44:13Have fun.
44:15Have an amazing time.
44:17I'm in a dating agency.
44:19What do you expect? I've dated someone else
44:21and he's literally the most incredible
44:23guy that I've met.
44:25I'm going to go with Alex.
44:27Sorry, Rhys, but
44:29didn't quite make the cut.
44:31Good luck, mate.
44:33Have a good time.
44:35I actually feel like I've dodged a bullet.
44:37I just feel like she's led me on
44:39and I just hope she doesn't treat Alex
44:41the same way she's treated me.
44:43Is that all sorted now, my darlings?
44:47Fucking hell.
44:49I think Ella handled herself really, really well,
44:51to be fair. She's massively
44:53put everything on the line for me.
44:55I'm going to back her as much as she's
44:57backed me tonight, massively.
44:59She's wicked. If we can get through that,
45:01then...
45:03Well, anything's walking the path.
45:05Right.
45:07I had butterflies the whole time.
45:09I just enjoyed every
45:11single second of being
45:13in Alex's company.
45:15Leave it out, Ella. The last 300 seconds or so
45:17were proper shit.
45:19Oh, my God. Jesus.
45:21How am I going to explain this to my mum?
45:23Maybe just don't tell her?
45:25What the hell? I've never had so many guys fight over me
45:27in my life. It actually feels quite nice.
45:31Next week...
45:33It's floating around, man. Have you seen the look of it?
45:35Lauren gets a salty mouthful.
45:37Please swallow it. Oh, my gosh.
45:39Kinky.
45:41You've got love bites all over you.
45:43Chris gets schooled.
45:45I'm not a mug and I'm not a pushover.
45:47I don't care who the fuck you are. I will not be disrespected.
45:49OK. See you later, hon.
45:51Cool. And Jamelia
45:53gets honest. I guess what I'm saying is
45:55I want me from the guy.
45:57You want you with a penis? Yeah.
45:59As are celebs.
46:01I don't want to flash you.
46:03Wow. I just need to know
46:05that you're not just going to fuck off
46:07at the drop of a hat.
46:09Go!
46:11I've had the worst case of blue balls.
46:13Honey, you need a Tommy Tank.
46:15Dating!
46:17The official boyfriend and girlfriend.
46:19Great job, us. Yes.
46:21Great job.
46:37Bye.
46:39Bye.