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00:00I love it.
00:05This is
00:10Monday Night Raw.
00:31I've heard that before.
00:33About to come down.
00:37Yeah, here he comes.
00:40Weighing 250 pounds, Tatanka.
00:45Native American Tatanka.
00:47From the outer ridges of your mind, weighing 269 pounds, Damien D'Amico.
00:54What a matchup here to begin things on Monday Night Raw.
00:58We are live.
00:59We're happening from New York City's Manhattan Center.
01:02Rob Bartlett, along with a macho man, Randy Savage and Vince McMahon.
01:07It's cold outside, but it's hot in here.
01:09We're all the way live and we're uncut.
01:12Uncensored.
01:13And uncooked.
01:14You bet.
01:15And Tatanka getting ready to lock up with Damien D'Amico.
01:19Series of headbutts to the rope now.
01:22Tatanka, it's gonna be a quick match.
01:24One, two, and three.
01:25No.
01:26Count of two.
01:27Tatanka almost putting the pin on Damien D'Amico here in the early stages of the matchup.
01:33A little bit later on here tonight, you'll see high energy in a tag team matchup.
01:38And of course, our feature attraction,
01:41we'll see Typhoon squaring off against that evil crown doink.
01:45Look at this.
01:47Tatanka turning the power clothesline over goes D'Amico.
01:52Whoa.
01:53Wait a minute.
01:55What he doesn't know is coming up from behind, Tatanka.
02:00Oh, what a chop.
02:02Boys, you want to take that back in the ring?
02:04Yeah.
02:05Right out here in front of us, Tatanka taking it to D'Amico.
02:09One, two, three.
02:10Oh, my goodness.
02:12I love it.
02:14D'Amico getting signals from the skybox.
02:17He thinks he's back at the Super Bowl.
02:19Charging another chop.
02:20Down he goes.
02:21By the way, Vince, you owe me 50 bucks.
02:23Yeah, well, that's beside the point.
02:26Tatanka backing D'Amico to the corner now.
02:29Oh, look at that.
02:31And ladies and gentlemen, a very special interview.
02:35A little bit later on with Brutus, the Barber of Beefcake.
02:40Welcome back, Brutus.
02:42Oh, what a clothesline that was.
02:48You know, after yesterday's game, I think Vince Ferrazza
02:50is a lot closer to joining the WWF than he originally thought.
02:53Well, he's certainly welcome, that's for sure.
02:56Congratulations to the Dallas Cowboys.
03:00And Tatanka now off the rope.
03:02Oh, my.
03:05Very competitive matchup here, opening up things on Monday Night Raw,
03:09live and down the leg.
03:12Big, tough match right here.
03:15And a cover.
03:17Not much of one.
03:18You're not going to be able to pin a man the caliber of Tatanka that fashion.
03:22You're going to have to hook the leg and cinch it up.
03:26To the inside of the thigh.
03:29Lower abdominal region.
03:32It was.
03:33Referee right there.
03:36And pouring it on now.
03:38Damien D'Amico, another cover and another kick out.
03:41I've got to point out right now that Tatanka is undefeated so far
03:45when he came into the World Wrestling Federation.
03:47But right now, he's going against Damien D'Amico live, Monday Night Raw,
03:50and anything can happen.
03:52You know, when I was a kid, I used to have a couple of his trucks.
03:56Tatanka?
03:57Tatanka trucks.
03:58Oh, yeah, right.
03:59Those kind of remarks hurt.
04:05Tatanka has to figure some measure of escape here.
04:09Damien D'Amico has him down on the canvas.
04:12And it could very well be that undefeated streak you pointed there,
04:15mentioned earlier, Macho, could be slipping right through the fingers of Tatanka.
04:20Exactly.
04:21The competition of the World Wrestling Federation is the toughest I've ever seen it.
04:30Tatanka making his move now.
04:32Series of elbows to the abdomen.
04:34Off the rope.
04:35Tatanka with a boot and he just collapses right there in front of you.
04:39You know, the mystery about Damien D'Amico is over now.
04:41What's that?
04:42He's Ruth Buzzy's love child.
04:45He is?
04:48Uh-oh.
04:49Tatanka trying to build a head of steam.
04:54D'Amico crashing down his shoulder area.
04:56Look at this.
04:58He's trying to set him up now.
04:59Tatanka sending D'Amico off the rope.
05:01And oh, and a chop that one.
05:03Big time momentum on that chop.
05:06Tatanka with D'Amico has him up and yes!
05:12The cover.
05:13He looks to leg two and a count of three.
05:15Still undefeated.
05:20Here is your winner, Tatanka.
05:27Tatanka victorious.
05:30What an ovation for the Native American who is still undefeated.
05:34Tatanka, one of the many superstars on hand, by the way.
05:38Well, and last Friday night, Madison Square Garden extravaganza.
05:42Tatanka, along with the Macho Man and a whole bunch of others,
05:45were there for a very, very special reason.
05:47To kick off Headlock on Hunger.
05:51And there you see the Hitman, Bret Hart,
05:54winding his way to the Square Circle with a check for $100,000.
06:00Let me tell you, the emotion was high in Madison Square Garden
06:03last Friday night.
06:05And I was a part of it, and I feel real good about it.
06:09The Hitman, Bret Hart, leading all the World Wrestling Federation
06:12superstars and the fans for this gallant effort.
06:15Let's take you now to the comments of the Hitman.
06:20On behalf of myself and each and every one of the superstars
06:25of the World Wrestling Federation,
06:28and on behalf of the staff and the management and the promotion
06:33of the World Wrestling Federation,
06:36and especially on behalf of each and every one of the
06:40World Wrestling Federation fans that have shown up tonight,
06:46it's an honor and a privilege to give you this check
06:49from the American Bret Hart for $100,000.
06:59The Hitman, Bret Hart, presenting a check for $100,000.
07:02There's gonna be a whole lot more
07:06Ladies and gentlemen, my guest at this time,
07:11unquestionably one of the all-time greats
07:14in the World Wrestling Federation.
07:20Would you welcome, please, the one and the only
07:24Brutus the Barber, Beefcake!
07:28Beefcake!
07:46Unbelievable, this guy is back.
07:49Looks like he got a little too close with those snippers.
07:52Fans love him. They haven't forgotten him one bit.
07:55Brutus the Barber!
07:58What an ovation.
07:59Just has to make you feel real, real good.
08:02Makes me feel great, Vince McMahon.
08:04I feel like a million times.
08:06We haven't seen you since that devastating
08:10and near-fatal parasailing accident.
08:13Good to have you back.
08:15Well, it's great to be back, Vince,
08:17and I came here for one reason tonight,
08:20and that's to make a very important announcement.
08:24Okay.
08:27I intend to return to the WWF,
08:33to return to the ring,
08:35to return to the strutting and the cutting
08:39and to take on all comers, whatever they may be.
08:43Brutus the Barber, Beefcake is back!
08:50I have to say, though, Brutus,
08:51I'm sure that I'm not the only individual
08:53who is certainly concerned with this comeback.
08:57I mean, considering the extent of the near-fatal accident,
09:01your whole face was totally reconstructed.
09:04To me, this is a very, very risky maneuver.
09:09Yes, Vince, it is.
09:11You could say it could be a risky involvement here,
09:15but I just came out here
09:17to give you a little bit of background
09:20and to let you know just exactly how and why
09:24I arrived at this decision.
09:26Let me tell you.
09:28Let me just start it out.
09:29Let me lay it out for you like this.
09:34Just before the accident,
09:36after a lengthy bout with cancer,
09:40I lay my frail 85-pound mother in the grave.
09:48Yeah. Okay.
09:50And not shortly after,
09:54I lay my father, who died of a heart attack,
09:59half from grief, half from sorrow,
10:03right next to her.
10:06This is all prior to the accident.
10:08This is before the accident.
10:10And then when things were pretty bad, Vince,
10:13and I was down,
10:14and I reached out for my wife,
10:17she slapped me upside the head with divorce papers
10:22and took off with some barfly with everything I had.
10:27All of this is prior to the accident.
10:30Nobody knew that.
10:32Well, you know something, Vince,
10:35notwithstanding all this,
10:37and I was pretty down at this point
10:40and a pretty desperate man,
10:42and broke and desperate,
10:44as I was walking along the beach
10:47and looking up into the sun,
10:50ba-boom!
10:52The knees of a girl parasailing
10:55smashed me in the face
10:57and shattered my skull in a million pieces.
11:04You know, my eyes were squashed into the back of my head,
11:08but my ears were still working.
11:11And as I was whisked off in a helicopter
11:14to the trauma center,
11:16I heard them talking.
11:19I heard what they said.
11:21And there wasn't much of a chance for me at this point.
11:26The next thing I knew, I was in the hospital
11:29surrounded by doctors,
11:31and once again, I was listening.
11:34They weren't giving me much of a chance.
11:39I was laying there
11:41without so much as an aspirin for 24 hours,
11:45waiting for them to decide what to do with me.
11:49What was going on in your mind?
11:51Vince, I was beaten down.
11:55I was about to give up.
11:57I felt the lifeblood oozing from my body.
12:02I was reaching out with my hands.
12:05I was putting myself in God's hands
12:10when another hand reached out and grabbed me.
12:16That hand was none other than the hand of Hawk Hogan.
12:25He's always been your friend to the end, Brutus.
12:29Always.
12:30More than that, Vince McMahon,
12:33Hulk was right there as I came out of surgery
12:37with my eyes sewn shut,
12:39a steel bolt through my nose holding my forehead on,
12:43my jaws wired shut with steel,
12:46eight steel plates, 30 screws,
12:49500 stitches later,
12:52Hulkster was there as they pulled the bandages,
12:56and as I saw a glimpse of light
13:00through the big, fat, swelled-up eyes,
13:03the first thing that I saw
13:05was the red and yellow standing over me.
13:09And he was saying,
13:11don't give up, Brutus.
13:14You gotta fight
13:15because me and all the Hulkamaniacs are behind you
13:19all the way,
13:20and no matter what happens,
13:22you'll be taken care of.
13:25Well, from that point on,
13:28from my first step,
13:30from the time I left the hospital
13:33to the time that I was back to my feet
13:37and regaining my strength,
13:39the Hulk was there all the time.
13:42But Brutus, even still, with all of that,
13:44and obviously you look in great condition still,
13:47it seems to me an unbelievable risk
13:50you getting back into the ring.
13:52That's true, Vince,
13:54but at this point,
13:56I'm a desperate man.
13:57I've got nothing left.
13:59Everything is gone.
14:00My career, everything is down the tubes.
14:04I went to the Hulkster,
14:06and as I looked him in the eye,
14:09he came with the answer
14:12before I could give the question.
14:15And his answer was,
14:18go for it, Brutus!
14:21Go for it!
14:24Well, with a good man,
14:26or the big man looking over your shoulder
14:29and Hulkster certainly encouraging,
14:31that's quite a tag team, isn't it?
14:33That's right, Vince McMahon,
14:35because after all this,
14:37and after all I've suffered,
14:39do you think that someone
14:41can actually hurt me?
14:43Do you think after all this suffering
14:45that a little bit of pain in this ring
14:47is gonna be enough to make me give up,
14:50to make me quit?
14:52Not a chance.
14:54Not a chance.
14:56So you're back to take on all comers?
14:58That's right.
14:59Anybody who wants to step in the ring with me,
15:02I've signed an open contract,
15:04and I'll take on anybody.
15:06I don't care how big or how small.
15:09Brutus the Barber of Beefcake, he's back!
15:12Oh, yeah!
15:14Well, Bartlett, winners never quit,
15:16and quitters never win.
15:18Brutus the Barber of Beefcake,
15:20I guess he's gonna go for it,
15:22just like Hulk Hogan says.
15:24Maybe he's gonna go all the way to WrestleMania.
15:27Don't count him out!
15:29No way!
15:31Go get him, Brutus!
15:32Come on, you're signed.
15:33So is everybody else.
15:34Yeah, dig it!
15:35It's coming.
15:38It's coming to the palace,
15:40Caesar's Palace,
15:41on Sunday afternoon, April 4th,
15:43the World Wrestling Federation's greatest spectacle,
15:46WrestleMania, is coming to Las Vegas.
15:48The new family entertainment capital of the world.
15:51And you and your family can experience
15:53all the fun and excitement live and in person.
15:55Just call 1-800-634-6698
15:58to charge tickets by phone.
16:00Call now and make plans to be part
16:02of the sports entertainment event of a lifetime.
16:07Oh, yeah!
16:08Get down!
16:10That's what we're doing here, Monday Night Raw.
16:12Brutus the Barber of Beefcake has announced
16:14he will return to ring action.
16:16Your analysis of that.
16:18When the going gets tough, the tough get going.
16:21And you gotta put Brutus the Barber of Beefcake
16:23in that category, no doubt.
16:25Speaking of Beefcake, let's go up to ringside.
16:30I love it.
16:31The following tag team contest is scheduled for one call.
16:35Coming towards the ring,
16:37at a total combined weight of 455 pounds,
16:41the Birdman Coco Beware,
16:43the Rocket Owen Hart,
16:45High Energy!
16:49Their opponents, at a total combined weight
16:52of 558 pounds,
16:54the team of Tom Cruise
16:57and Iron Mike Jordan.
17:05High Energy on Monday Night Raw,
17:08live from New York City.
17:14Anything can happen.
17:16Yeah.
17:17Can you imagine someone suffering a near fatal accident
17:20like Brutus did?
17:22He has, I believe he said,
17:24nine steel plates in his face
17:26and 30 screws,
17:28and yet he wants to return to action.
17:30Obviously, he thinks his back's against the wall,
17:33and when somebody's like that,
17:35you can't tell what they're gonna do.
17:37Nonetheless, a very risky maneuver,
17:39but certainly a gallant one.
17:41You have to give him, well, credit for the guts.
17:44That's for sure to come back.
17:45Exactly, 1,000%.
17:47I'm in the corner of Brutus the Barber and Beefcake
17:50because he's taking a chance,
17:51and, hey, you gotta take a chance once in a while,
17:54but this is a big one.
17:56Step up, drop kick,
17:57Iron Mike right down,
17:58and Owen Hart,
17:59brother of the World Wrestling Federation
18:01champion hitman Bret Hart,
18:02on top of things.
18:04Arm bar.
18:06I think Mike Sharp is what David Cassidy would be
18:09if he'd eaten his vegetables
18:10when he was growing up.
18:11Really.
18:15Oh, make a wish.
18:17You know, tomorrow, Vince McMahon,
18:19is Groundhog Day.
18:20What do you think about that, Rob Bartlett?
18:22I think if Bobby Heenan sees his shadow,
18:24we'll have six more weeks of winter.
18:26Exactly.
18:28Maybe he'll leave the planet.
18:30Not a chance.
18:32Too busy on him.
18:33All-American Wrestling here on USA.
18:36Oh, man!
18:39Bobby Heenan and Gorilla Monsoon
18:40are out in Las Vegas,
18:42side of WrestleMania,
18:43or rather, not Gorilla Monsoon,
18:45but Mean Gene Oakley.
18:46Mean Gene.
18:47Out there and having some fun.
18:49Wait a minute.
18:50One, two, that's not it.
18:51Yes!
18:52Oh.
18:53Big victory for High Energy.
18:57Here are your winners,
18:59High Energy!
19:02High Energy, victorious,
19:03Owen Hart and Coco Beware!
19:07We're live.
19:08It's Monday Night Raw.
19:09We'll be back with Typhoon,
19:11the big man at around the 400-pound mark,
19:14squaring off against the Evil Clown Doink.
19:20In just a few moments,
19:21ladies and gentlemen,
19:22the match we've been awaiting,
19:23it's Typhoon squaring off
19:25against the Evil Clown Doink.
19:27Now, recently, several weeks away,
19:29we saw Doink in action.
19:30It was anything but funny.
19:32Let's show you now exactly what happened
19:34when Doink went after Crush.
19:37Randy?
19:38Doink the Clown, infamous.
19:40He's anything but funny.
19:41Look right in the background right there.
19:43He appears to take his arm out of his socket right there.
19:47And on the street, the word on the street
19:49was it was filled with lead.
19:51Now, this Crush is the big man from Kona, Hawaii.
19:54Now, watch in the background.
19:56Right against the spine and the head right there.
19:58And my heart goes out to Crush.
20:00And let me tell you something,
20:01Doink's in the danger zone right now.
20:03Approximately two weeks ago, this happened.
20:06And I might add that Crush,
20:08watching this from Kona, Hawaii,
20:10convalescing, will be returning in several weeks to action.
20:14Ladies and gentlemen,
20:15as we take you back up to the fig.
20:17The following contest is scheduled for one fall.
20:20And here it comes.
20:22The Clown.
20:23Coming down the aisle.
20:25Anything but funny.
20:27I don't even like the music.
20:29Doink the Clown.
20:32The Clown.
20:33Don't you think Doink is really one of those clowns
20:35just crying on the inside?
20:37No, I don't think this man is sensitive at all.
20:39Aw, come on.
20:40Like one of those sad red skeleton paintings?
20:42Uh-uh.
20:43Not this guy.
20:45What about Crush, Rob Bartlett?
20:47You think he's doing real, real good right now?
20:49I'm hoping the big comeback
20:51zeroes in on this guy right here.
20:53He's infamous, okay,
20:54because he took the big man down.
20:55From behind him.
20:56From behind.
20:57Exactly.
20:59Kona Crush looking forward to his shot.
21:01However, here comes a man
21:04who can really give you a driving.
21:06384 pounds.
21:08Time.
21:09Boom.
21:12Take a look at the size of Typhoon.
21:15One hip with a natural disaster
21:17zeroing in on Doink.
21:21Doink, somewhat of an individual of contrast.
21:25You would think most clowns like to make children laugh.
21:28This guy likes to make them cry.
21:30He's dressed in this ridiculous-looking outfit.
21:32You wouldn't think he would have any idea
21:34what he's doing in the squared circle.
21:35However, as you have already seen
21:37with a series of maneuvers and holds,
21:39Doink is a very accomplished wrestler.
21:41That's what really makes me mad about him right now.
21:44I just wish it was easy pickings,
21:46but he's not.
21:47Look, he took this guy down again.
21:50You know, he belongs to Clowns Anonymous.
21:53What a different style he has, Vince McMahon.
21:55It's unbelievable.
21:56Than anybody else.
21:58And again, Doink.
22:01With a maneuver, a referee might get over there
22:03and check to see if that forearm is underneath the chin.
22:06Big Typhoon back to his feet,
22:08and there you see the strength of Typhoon.
22:10I like that.
22:14And Doink knows full well
22:16he's gonna have to counter
22:18with the girth and size of Typhoon.
22:21Did you see the way Typhoon was looking at Doink?
22:23A little bit puzzling.
22:25Yeah, with respect, no doubt of that.
22:26I mean, it's tough to look at a man who looks like Doink.
22:29Look at that maneuver.
22:31And at the same time,
22:32recognize that he has extraordinary wrestling skill.
22:35He's got balance.
22:36Did you see that?
22:37He took Typhoon down with balance.
22:42Dress slot.
22:45And Doink applying hold after hold on the Big Man.
22:48You know, I know Crush is watching this right now,
22:50and I'd just like to say,
22:52Get better, Big Man.
22:54We threw one in the sky.
22:56Oh, he's gonna be back.
22:57I don't think he really wants to be a clown.
23:01I think you're doing one.
23:03Bartlett's doing a heck of a job.
23:05He should head to one of those 12-step programs, you know,
23:07when he gets the urge to take a pie in the face,
23:09he calls somebody.
23:10I see.
23:12Can you believe he's got Typhoon down right now?
23:14No.
23:17Typhoon trying to make a move here on Doink.
23:22Have a bumper sticker on his little clown car,
23:24another friend of Bozo's.
23:26There you go.
23:30And again, to the buckle now.
23:32Right, take that.
23:34And Typhoon with a knee.
23:36Typhoon perhaps in control.
23:38To the far side, out and, oh, yes.
23:42Uh-oh, look at that.
23:43Wreck of the eyes and face.
23:45Wait a minute, what's going on here?
23:47Back to a front face lock, spins around.
23:49Nice balance, riding him a little high.
23:51Drops his face down to canvas just for good measure.
23:56Southpaw, forearm to the head area.
24:00Typhoon's off to a slow start,
24:02but I think he's going to get the momentum right now.
24:04Look at this.
24:05Look at Doink chopping away on the big man.
24:09And look at this, he's caught in midair.
24:12Big power slam by Typhoon.
24:14That's what I've been waiting for right there.
24:19And now Typhoon taking over here on Doink.
24:22Has him cornered.
24:24And a whip to the bumper.
24:26Here comes Typhoon.
24:29Doink now, back to the corner.
24:33And hooks him, one.
24:34Wait a minute, he has his tights.
24:36A handful of tights.
24:37Gave him a wedgie.
24:41Here is your winner, Doink McCloud.
24:46He just belted Typhoon.
24:49Doink McCloud points Doink.
24:51That's exactly what Typhoon attempted to do.
24:54Real nice crush.
24:56Would like to do as well.
24:58Nonetheless, in the record book,
25:01it'll show a victory for that man right there, Doink.
25:06And by the way, if you're looking for one way
25:08to kick off your Saturday mornings,
25:10there's one real good way, WWF Mania.
25:15Ah, it's Saturday morning.
25:18You just can't seem to get out of bed.
25:21Ah, wake up!
25:25Now, there's an exciting new reason to rise and shine.
25:28WWF Mania.
25:31The whole family will love our stunning superstars,
25:33candid interviews, and of course,
25:35tons of great wrestling action.
25:37WWF Mania.
25:39More jolting than a cup of coffee.
25:41And it's 100% caffeine free.
25:44And this is the man that we all wake up to
25:46at 10 o'clock eastern time every Saturday morning,
25:49Todd Peddingill.
25:50Todd, what's on tap for this coming Saturday morning?
25:53What are you gonna wake us up with this Saturday?
25:55Vince, a guy who is wreaking havoc in the WWF.
25:58It could be anybody.
25:59Why are 16 men terrified of one individual?
26:03I'm talking about the giant Gonzalez.
26:06You will see him, WWF Mania, Saturday morning at 10.
26:10Do you know him?
26:11Not very well, but I'd like to.
26:13I'm sure.
26:14I'm gonna do Dwarf on Golf standing next to him,
26:177 foot 8 and 2 feet, Saturday morning.
26:20Let's go up to Howard Finkel.
26:28Ladies and gentlemen, as many of you know,
26:32one of the legends last week passed away.
26:36And I'm referring to Andre the Giant.
26:41Andre, throughout his World Wrestling Federation career,
26:46provided many an exciting moment
26:48for both young and old alike.
26:51And his unique presence will surely be missed.
26:55Ladies and gentlemen, I would like to ask you all to rise
27:00in tribute to a man who truly was one of a kind,
27:05Andre the Giant.
27:29It's Monday Night Raw, and it's uncut, uncensored.
27:57And Rob's busy, but it's uncut as well.
27:59Busy.
28:00Sorry.
28:01I'm busy now.
28:03Promotional consideration paid for by the following.
28:06To be the World Wrestling Federation champion,
28:08you gotta want it every day.
28:10It takes an integrated approach to training,
28:12and that is what ICO Pro is all about.
28:19WWF figures give you the fury of the Hitman.
28:21And the bite of the Bulldog.
28:23And the firepower of Sergeant Slaughter.
28:25WWF figures ain't sold separately, dig it?
28:28Chips!
28:30Gotta have beef.
28:32Gotta have spice.
28:33Need a little excitement?
28:35Snap into a Slim Jim.
28:36Oh, yeah.
28:41Slim Jim for those times when you don't really care
28:43what part of the cow you're eating, right?
28:45Yes.
28:46Approaching the ring with Mr. Fuji.
28:49Take a look at this athlete.
28:50Weighing 505 pounds,
28:54Yokozuna!
28:56Winner of the Royal Rumble,
28:58Yokozuna headed to WrestleMania.
29:01Hey, was that Suni?
29:02Weighing 225 pounds, Bobby DeVito!
29:07Let me tell you something,
29:08I got some experience against Yokozuna,
29:10and it wasn't very nice.
29:12I was the last one in there with him at the Royal Rumble,
29:15and guess what happened to me?
29:17Over the top and onto the floor,
29:19and he's going on to WrestleMania Las Vegas.
29:22Yeah, but you knocked him down.
29:23You knocked him off his feet for the first time.
29:25I don't believe so.
29:26I don't think anyone has ever done that.
29:28Hacksaw Jim Duggan certainly hopes to do that.
29:30However, next weekend, as a matter of fact,
29:33Hacksaw has his opportunity.
29:37This past weekend, Hacksaw Jim Duggan
29:39issuing the challenge to Yokozuna.
29:42And the big man is very much forward.
29:47Looking to something along those lines.
29:50Looking forward to getting in the ring
29:51and knocking Yokozuna off his feet.
29:52Well, I'm in Hacksaw Jim Duggan's corner.
29:55He's got the USA written all over him,
29:57and I think that he can do it.
29:59Matter of fact, I believe we have a telephone hookup
30:02with Hacksaw Jim Duggan.
30:04Hello, Jim.
30:06No, I guess not.
30:09You know, Vince, I know this is a good time to mention it,
30:11but I've been with the WWF for a month now,
30:14and there's still no Rob action figure.
30:17There's no Rob Bartlett action figure?
30:19No.
30:20Well, I mean, we could have a Rob Bartlett action figure
30:23with a power slam eating action.
30:26Something along those lines.
30:28You and George Foreman, maybe.
30:32Take a look at this athlete, would you?
30:34505 pounds.
30:37That was the butt cam we had there for a second.
30:39Yokozuna.
30:40It was the wide lens, whatever it was.
30:44And a charge.
30:46Right on the money.
30:50And I do believe we have Hacksaw Jim Duggan with us.
30:52Hello, Hacksaw.
30:55Hello, Jim, can you hear us?
30:59Somebody better tell Jim to cut his television set down.
31:01He can't hear us.
31:02I can hear you.
31:03Oh, you can't hear us.
31:04How you doing, Vince?
31:05We're great.
31:06I'm just starting to get a little fired up here
31:08watching that big Yokozuna in the ring.
31:10Yeah, well, you have challenged him.
31:12What do you think your chances of knocking him off his feet
31:14really are?
31:16No question about it.
31:17He's at least twice as big as me.
31:19And he's fairly strong.
31:21And I know what Mr. Fuji is capable of,
31:23but I really believe in my heart,
31:25I can knock that Yokozuna off his feet.
31:28I think it's pronounced Yokozuna.
31:30Well, whatever you call him.
31:31It's some Japanese name.
31:33Well, all right.
31:34You made reference earlier this week into a trade deficit
31:37and things of that nature.
31:38Thinking that perhaps you, representing the United States,
31:42might be able to beat this big man,
31:44knock him off his feet, representing
31:46the country of Japan.
31:47Well, that's right, Vince.
31:48You know, I think he might have his mind on the WWF heavyweight
31:51title at WrestleMania in Las Vegas.
31:54He's not stepping on his feet yet.
31:56But when him and Mr. Fuji walk out of the ring
31:59waving that Japanese flag, they're going to step in the ring
32:03and they're going to see hundreds of American flags waving.
32:06They're going to hear thousands of people chanting USA, USA.
32:12And I want them to understand this.
32:14I will not disappoint myself.
32:17I will not disappoint my family.
32:20And by God, I will not disappoint my country.
32:23I'm going to knock him off his feet.
32:25And I will knock Yokozuna off his feet.
32:29He's stomping the ground, some guy.
32:31Oh!
32:32Excuse me, Vince.
32:33I'm getting fired up right now.
32:34I can tell you.
32:35We look forward to that this weekend.
32:37Hacksaw, thanks for joining us.
32:39Hacksaw, Jim Duggan.
32:41One-on-one against Yokozuna.
32:43If anyone can knock this big man off his feet,
32:45it's Hacksaw, Jim Duggan.
32:47He's going to take on Mission Impossible, yeah.
32:49We'll be back with Lex Luger, the Narcissist.
32:52What a competitor I believe he's going to be.
32:55We'll return to more WWF action.
33:01We're back with more Monday Night Raw.
33:04And joining us right now, ladies and gentlemen,
33:07the tag team champions of the World Wrestling Federation,
33:10Erwin R. Scheister, Ted DiBiase.
33:18Here they are, Money Incorporated.
33:21Everybody's got a price.
33:25Everybody's going to pay.
33:30There's the Million Dollar Man.
33:33All right, Ted DiBiase.
33:35Erwin R. Scheister, that has to bother you.
33:37You come out here to a capacity crowd,
33:39what do you hear?
33:46The only thing that bothers me, McMahon,
33:48is an empty bank account, and I'll never have that.
33:53All right, gentlemen, you asked for this time.
33:56Go ahead.
33:58What do you have to say?
34:00Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall.
34:03Humpty Dumpty had a great fall,
34:06but all the king's men and all the king's horses
34:10couldn't put Humpty back together again.
34:13Okay, and what's that supposed to mean?
34:18It's very simple, McMahon.
34:20My partner, Erwin, and I are sitting back in the back,
34:23and we saw Brutus the Barber Beefcake come out here
34:26and pour out that sweet sob story.
34:29And I'll have to admit, it's a pretty sad story.
34:33The guy loses his mother, then he loses his father,
34:36then he loses his wife, and if that's not bad enough,
34:40he gets his face smashed, and that's bad.
34:44But I'm here to say that when you got your face smashed,
34:47Beefcake, you knocked the screw loose.
34:49Pardon the pun.
34:51Because for you to come out here
34:53after three years of never being in the ring
34:56and offer an open challenge
34:59to any wrestler in the World Wrestling Federation,
35:02you got a lot of gall.
35:04That's like a slap in the face.
35:06So let's cut through all the small talk and get to the point.
35:09You want a match? We'll give you a match.
35:12Why don't you start out with a champion?
35:14And you got your choice of two right here.
35:17The World Wrestling Federation,
35:19tag team champions.
35:21Both of us would like to have a shot at you.
35:23So you take your pick.
35:25No, better yet, Erwin, let's do this the Democratic way,
35:28because I know you want this shot, too.
35:30Let's flip a coin. Have you got a coin?
35:33Right here.
35:35Wait a minute.
35:37Just a minute. Let him flip the coin.
35:40As I win, I win.
35:44And it looks like, Beefcake,
35:48if you want to accept the challenge,
35:50the open contract, it's gonna be the Million Dollar Man.
35:54Jimmy Hart, where have you been?
35:56Did you put them up to this? What are you doing?
35:58You know, this is ridiculous. This is a waste of time, guys.
36:01Let me tell you something.
36:03We're the World Wrestling Federation tag team champions.
36:06Erwin, if you get in the ring with Brutus and you get hurt,
36:09it's over, baby.
36:11If you get in the ring with Brutus and get hurt,
36:13it's over for us as a tag team, man.
36:15Calm down, Jimmy. Calm down.
36:17This is strictly recreational.
36:20Look, you're our manager.
36:22It's a workout, exactly.
36:24You think that this man or myself
36:27is gonna climb in the ring with a guy
36:29that hasn't been in the ring for three years,
36:31and you're worried about one of us getting hurt?
36:33If anybody gets hurt, Jimmy,
36:35it's gonna be Beefcake,
36:37and we know where and how to hurt him.
36:39What do you mean by that? What do you mean?
36:41Let me talk here. Wait a minute.
36:43First of all, Beefcake, you're breaking our hearts
36:46with this sad, sad story.
36:48But let me point something out to you, Beefcake.
36:51While you're laying on your back,
36:53all those doctor bills collect and realize
36:56that you're not paying any tax.
36:59So that makes you no better
37:01than every one of these stinking tag teams
37:03right here and all over the world.
37:06And, Beefcake, that's your biggest mistake.
37:09You're not paying your fair share.
37:11That's right, Erwin.
37:13In addition to that, the way I see it,
37:15in addition to being a tax cheat, Beefcake,
37:18you've only got one asset left.
37:21You are destitute. You're penniless.
37:23You've had it bad.
37:25But the only asset he's got left
37:27is that million-dollar face.
37:29And you know we wouldn't do anything to that.
37:32Well, look, why don't both you guys quit clowning around?
37:35We've got contracts to sign.
37:37We've got matches to talk about, so let's go.
37:39Come on. What I'm talking about.
37:41Let's go.
37:51Unbelievable. I can't believe those guys, Bartlett,
37:54are trying to challenge off Beefcake
37:56with the situation he's in right now.
37:58It doesn't seem fair, does it?
38:00That's the viciousness of the World Wrestling Federation
38:02Tag Team Champions.
38:04And talk about the unbelievable people
38:08here comes another one.
38:11Yeah, I'll say.
38:13Ladies and gentlemen,
38:15here is the Narcissist,
38:18Lex Luger!
38:23The Narcissist, Lex Luger.
38:25You saw him make his debut
38:27at the Royal Rumble,
38:29a very impressive debut.
38:31Allegedly,
38:35this man puts everyone else's physique
38:37to shame, just asking.
38:39You talk about someone who is truly in love with himself,
38:42you're looking at him.
38:44Well, I believe in myself,
38:46and I tell everybody to believe in themselves,
38:48but this guy is too much.
38:52Look at this.
38:54Loves the mirror.
38:56Loves it.
39:02Look at him looking at himself.
39:05Unquestionably, a very impressive physique.
39:07Yes.
39:09Really put together.
39:11Oh, look who's put together.
39:13Did you see that?
39:15Yes, Lex Luger, the Narcissist.
39:17Somebody else just came into the ring.
39:19Vince, you won't believe this.
39:21Look at that.
39:23Wait a minute, what's that?
39:25It's Victor Buono.
39:27It's not Victor Buono.
39:29It's Raw.
39:31It's Monday Night Raw.
39:33Uncensored.
39:35And uncut.
39:37We'll be back with more Monday Night Raw.
39:39Stay with us.
39:43We're back. Mr. Luger is extremely upset.
39:47And he may be upset for another reason.
39:49Let's take you now to Mr. Perfect,
39:51and perhaps Buffalo could have used the services
39:54of Mr. Perfect just yesterday.
39:59Hi, I'm Steve Jordan of the Minnesota Vikings.
40:01Some people say that Warren Moon is a great passer.
40:03Around these parts, they say that Fran Tarkenton is the greatest.
40:06I want to introduce you to the perfect passer.
40:09That's right, I am the perfect passer,
40:11and I understand you're the perfect tight end.
40:13What's your favorite route?
40:15That would be the tight end option route.
40:17You know the one.
40:19Got it. Set, hut!
40:32Hut!
40:36Boy, that's a great pass.
40:38I tell you, this guy is a perfect passer.
40:42Well, thank you, Steve.
40:44But you haven't seen anything yet.
40:46Watch this.
40:48Watch this.
41:18Wow! Did you see that?
41:34What a throw! What a catch!
41:37That was unbelievable.
41:39No, no, no. That was perfect.
41:43We are back!
41:46And I got to say, that is perfect when you can throw the ball
41:49and catch your own pass.
41:51That's quite an exceptional athlete.
41:54And we're looking at another exceptional athlete,
41:56the narcissist Lex Luger, who claims he is beyond being perfect.
42:01That remains to be seen.
42:03Luger now locking up with his opposition, Jason Knight,
42:06unquestionably one of the more powerful men
42:08in the World Wrestling Federation.
42:12Mr. Luger always smiling.
42:14And take a look. He's right in the middle of a match.
42:16Now he looks down at his skin, looks down at his muscularity,
42:19and is very impressed with himself.
42:21Vince, I just got some news that I don't know if I like or not.
42:25Rob, you got to listen to this.
42:27What?
42:28Brutus the Barber Beefcake just accepted the challenge
42:31to either Ted DiBiase or IRS.
42:35And even though I'm in Brutus the Barber Beefcake's corner,
42:39you know how dangerous that is.
42:41No question about it.
42:43Nonetheless, undaunted, Brutus the Barber Beefcake.
42:48One-on-one next week, I believe, against the million-dollar man
42:52Ted DiBiase.
42:55To the buckle, and here comes Mr. Knight right into a boot.
43:00And, oh, it's almost good night for Mr. Knight.
43:03By the way, after Monday Night Raw,
43:06we invite you to join us here on USA.
43:09Quantum Leap will be headed your way.
43:12With Scott Bakula.
43:16Quantum Leap following Monday Night Raw.
43:19Tag team right here on USA.
43:22Again, Mr. Luger looked down at himself.
43:26Take a picture and last longer.
43:32Bobby the Brain Heenan introducing the Narcissist.
43:36Lex Luger at the Royal Rumble, and Mr. Heenan very high.
43:42On the aspirations of Lex Luger,
43:44and now I think we can get a good indication as to why.
43:47You know, Vince, I want a wrestling name.
43:49I beg your pardon?
43:50All you guys have really cool names.
43:51Bobby the Brain Heenan.
43:52Whoa, look at that.
43:54From one side of the ring to the other.
43:57And it appears as though Jason Knight is...
44:02Is he out? Is he unconscious? I can't tell.
44:06Basically out on his feet.
44:08And if he wasn't, he's probably out now.
44:12He's having some fun in there.
44:14When he gets the guy down, he struts,
44:17but I just stole him away.
44:20Watch this.
44:21His pinky on the chest.
44:23That's arrogance for you.
44:24Look at that.
44:25Too much.
44:28Here is your winner, the Narcissist,
44:32Lex Luger.
44:37And I think it looks to me like this fellow Jason Knight
44:40really is unconscious.
44:43I'd like to see him do that against Mr. Perfect.
44:46He can't.
44:49But can Luger throw a pass like Mr. Perfect?
44:54Or catch one.
44:55I guess it really doesn't matter when it comes to
44:57what you can do inside the squared circle.
45:00Look at this.
45:01Oh, come on.
45:02I saw that in the Three Stooges once.
45:04I saw that in the Three Stooges once.
45:05The Narcissist, Lex Luger, victorious.
45:07We'll be back with a word about next week.
45:12An important note, ladies and gentlemen,
45:13next week you will not see us on Monday Night Raw.
45:16You're going to see the Dog Show.
45:17What, you think we just saw the Dog Show?
45:20Oh, wow.
45:21Well, in any event, in two weeks' time,
45:23we'll return for a 16-man over the top rope battle royal
45:27and one-on-one Brutus to Barber Beefcake
45:30squaring off against the Million Dollar Man,
45:33Ted DiBiase.
45:34What do you look for in that matchup?
45:35Well, I just look for Brutus to Barber Beefcake
45:38to survive it, I'll tell you the truth.
45:40Against all odds.
45:41It really is against all odds.
45:43Nonetheless, Brutus looking forward to his opportunity
45:46to return and you, the 16-man over the top rope battle royal,
45:50will Rob Bartlett enter the battle royal?
45:53We're going to have to wait, I guess,
45:55in two weeks to find out.
45:56Yes or no?
45:57I want my own action figure.