The Toxic Crusaders - 1x02 - This Spud's for You
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00:00Toxic Crusaders
00:30Though we're hideously deformed
00:44Hey, I'm sittin' on top of the world
00:48With my Mach 2-2 and girl
00:52Wow!
00:53Toxic Crusaders
00:55Toxic Crusaders
00:57Toxic
01:01You left my heart
01:07Flattering roadkill
01:11You squished my love
01:15Like a bucket of guts
01:24That was just beautiful, Yvonne!
01:27Anybody seen my hanky?
01:30I've got it!
01:31My hanky?
01:32No, the answer to our problems!
01:34I found jobs for all of us!
01:36Jobs?!
01:38Why do we need jobs anyway?
01:39We're the Toxic Crusaders!
01:42Yes, but superheroing isn't a very high-paying profession.
01:45And the landlord wants his rent.
01:47And the medical benefits take.
01:49Uh, anything for a hideously deformed creature with superhuman size and strength?
01:53Sort of.
01:54This ad calls for someone who loves children and doesn't mind getting messy.
01:59Close enough.
02:00Yvonne, this job calls for a person with a warm heart and superior musical skills.
02:06Perfect!
02:08Looking for someone who really wants to clean up?
02:12Forget it, mop! This one is mine!
02:16Oh, here's one for me!
02:19Earn big pay, no heavy lifting!
02:22What about me?
02:24Well, how about this?
02:26Looking for someone who is outgoing and has a large nose?
02:29It's a stretch, but I'll try.
02:38A riddle is a joke.
02:40A bicycle wheel has a spoke.
02:42The white of an egg is the...
02:44Albumin.
02:45Yolk!
02:46I'm sorry, Leo.
02:48The answer is the albumin.
02:50If I wasn't the bad guy, I could really clean up on these shows.
02:57I don't like that, Killamoff.
02:59That's Dr. Killamoff to you.
03:03Yeah, sure. I'm sorry, Dr. Killamoff.
03:07It won't happen again.
03:09Anyway, like I was saying, I don't like it, Killam.
03:13I mean, Dr. Killamoff.
03:15You're talking about messing with the food that little kids love to eat.
03:19I'll give you half the profits.
03:22Dale, I hate kids anyway.
03:24This is perfect.
03:26Everyone in Tromaville eats at Burpo Burger.
03:30Yeah, they got great fries.
03:32Exactly.
03:33And once I adjust those fries to my evil purpose,
03:37I'll control the people of Tromaville.
03:39Then no one can stop me from polluting this disgustingly clean little town.
03:45And once I pollute Tromaville, the rest of the world is mine.
03:50What happens if one of the Toxic Crusaders gets a job at Burpo Burger and foils your plan?
03:55Impossible!
03:57Imagine a Toxic Crusader working at Burpo Burger.
04:01Ridiculous.
04:03My plan is flawless.
04:08Even now, Dr. Bender is working on the most dastardly part of my plan.
04:21Here, my friend.
04:23One taste of this and you'll turn into a forgetful, nearsighted old rat.
04:34No! No!
04:36This is the 81st patch and it still isn't right.
04:39I need to test this right away.
04:41I need a human guinea pig.
04:43I need...
04:44Ah-ha!
04:46Hey, Stretch.
04:47Is this where the evil genius Dr. Bender hangs?
04:50Yes, yes.
04:51I'm the evil genius Dr. Bender.
04:53Cool.
04:54I got a telegram from a Dr. Kilimoff.
04:56How touching.
04:57He remembered my birthday.
04:59And that's more than I can say for my evil genius mother.
05:01Here's a little message just for you.
05:03Tell him, Tilly Tally, I need the kill.
05:05If you fail, you'll die today.
05:07Sincerely yours, Dr. K.
05:10What kind of a birthday greeting is that?
05:12Hey, I don't write them.
05:13I just sing them.
05:15No matter.
05:16Nope.
05:17No thanks, Doc.
05:18I'm a vegetarian.
05:19Why don't you just give me a tip and we'll call it even?
05:23Ah!
05:24Look out!
05:25Oh, I hate this job, man.
05:27Ah, look out!
05:28The atom smasher!
05:30Don't touch anything!
05:34And turn off that infernal radio!
05:36Hey, it's pure telegram.
05:42Ah!
05:43Ah!
05:46Where are we going, Doc?
05:48He can't.
05:49The atom smasher made us into one person.
05:51So unsmash us, man.
05:53I don't know how.
05:54Bummer.
05:55It's gonna be a little tough picking up chicks.
05:57Say, do you like sushi, Doc?
06:01I can't wait.
06:02I'm really gonna clean up in this job.
06:04You sure are.
06:06And you can start by dusting the window display.
06:11Yo, lady.
06:12Should I start here?
06:14Oh, man.
06:15Oh, man.
06:16Oh, yo.
06:22It worked!
06:23It's become a forgetful nearsighted old rat.
06:25Like I always say, the 82nd time's the charm.
06:29Oh, what is that gill?
06:31This isn't just any gill.
06:33This is...
06:34My arm!
06:35What's wrong with my arm?
06:36It doesn't work.
06:37Sure it does.
06:38Hi, Doc.
06:39Hi.
06:40As I was saying,
06:42this isn't just any gill.
06:43Anyone who eats it will turn into a forgetful nearsighted old person.
06:47Pull off that paper.
06:48I call it...
06:51Gross.
06:52Why'd you make it?
06:53Because.
06:54It's exactly what Dr. Killamaw voted.
06:59Oh, give to the poor.
07:03Give, cause it's right.
07:05If you don't give some now,
07:08some now,
07:09your big butt,
07:10he will bite.
07:15Come on, guys.
07:16Pick it up.
07:17Tempo, tempo, tempo.
07:20Right, right.
07:23Thanks, kind sir.
07:26Ice cream.
07:27Ice cream pop.
07:30Easy now.
07:31There's enough for everyone.
07:33Oops.
07:34I'll get another.
07:38Now be careful with that stuff, huh?
07:40Spread it good all over the potatoes.
07:47Thanks, Toxie.
07:48I always hated this shirt.
07:49Now I won't have to wear it anymore.
07:51Glad I could help.
07:53Toxie, it's so much fun to be acting up.
07:55Oh, they sure are.
07:57I better find out why fast.
08:04It's working perfectly.
08:06In just a few moments,
08:08my radiation rangers will have spread the Magoo
08:11into over the whole potato patch,
08:14setting my plan into full swing.
08:17I don't know.
08:18What if the Toxic Crusader's traumatons start acting up
08:21and he shows up and beats all our guys to a pulp?
08:23Don't be a fool.
08:25Bonehead is in charge
08:27and I know I'm going to be proud of him.
08:30Dr. Killamaw's gonna be proud of me.
08:32Maybe I'll get a promotion.
08:34Maybe I'll get a raise.
08:35Maybe he'll stop slapping me around.
08:37It's Killamaw's radiation rangers.
08:40They're polluting the potato patch with toxic chemicals.
08:43That's un-American.
08:45You've got to stop them, Toxie.
08:47Right.
08:48You know what you need?
08:49Uh, good luck kiss?
08:51Uh-uh, a battle cry.
08:53I do?
08:54Uh-huh, something to yell before you do battle
08:56that'll strike fear in the hearts of your enemies.
08:58Something like, it's clobbering time
09:00or hi-ho silver.
09:02Hmm.
09:03Wait, I got it.
09:07I hope I don't get hurt!
09:11We'll work on it.
09:13Look out!
09:14It's a toxic crusader!
09:16Stop him!
09:21Yeah, now finish off that toxic troublemaker!
09:27Oh, man, now what?
09:33Mashed potatoes?
09:35You got to do better than that to beat me.
09:39What the?
09:42Hey, what happened?
09:43Yeah, what happened?
09:45The mashed potatoes.
09:46They must have clogged up the intake vents
09:48on his life support system.
09:49He's overheating!
09:51Oh, yeah!
09:57Shoot, you cowards!
10:01All right.
10:02Back in the truck!
10:04Hey, you think you won, don't you?
10:06Well, go have some furpo fries on me!
10:12Toxie, you beat him!
10:14No, I mashed him.
10:16Whatever.
10:17I wonder what they were up to.
10:19Don't worry, Toxie.
10:20I'm sure we'll find out in act two.
10:22Yeah.
10:29Why do they call them furpo burgers, Dad?
10:31Don't ask.
10:32Hi, kids!
10:33It's me, Furpo Magician!
10:35And we're gonna have fun!
10:38Furpo is my name
10:40Illusions are my game
10:42And if you think I really think
10:43I'll say you think the same
10:45Ta-da!
10:49Oh, boy, tough crowd.
10:52Hi, kids!
10:53How about some balloon animals?
10:56Ta-da!
10:57It looks like a foot!
10:59Well, it is a foot.
11:01You know how hard it is to sculpt body parts?
11:04I wonder when I get a coffee break.
11:11Okay.
11:12This is the first patch of furpo fries
11:14Made from potatoes treated with Magoop 82.
11:16Cool.
11:17Furpo fries are the best.
11:19Don't eat those, fool!
11:21Or we'll turn into forgetful, nearsighted old men!
11:23Yuck!
11:24I thought they just made you fat.
11:27Enough talk!
11:28I want results!
11:29Show me that it works!
11:32Chill, chief.
11:33We told the staff here
11:34Not to eat any of the new furpo fries
11:36Because they were extra special.
11:38So what?
11:39So, of course, they ate them right away.
11:47Excellent!
11:50Excuse me, chubby.
11:52Do you know where the restroom is?
11:54Help me.
11:55Find it yourself, old man.
11:58Find what?
12:00The rest of the furpo fries will be ready this afternoon.
12:03Perfect!
12:05Soon, all of Tromaville
12:07Will be full of forgetful, nearsighted old people.
12:10And nothing will stop me
12:12From making this town my pollution headquarters.
12:15Suburban branch.
12:17Like I said before,
12:19What if one of the toxic crusaders
12:21Gets a job here and discovers your plan?
12:23Ridiculous!
12:24What are the odds of that happening?
12:25They love me!
12:26I'm a hit!
12:28Uh-oh.
12:29Looks like the odds are pretty good.
12:31I don't suppose you guys
12:33Would like some balut edible?
12:36Ice cream! Ice cream!
12:38Get it before it gets away!
12:41How's business, Toxie?
12:43Oh, terrible.
12:44No one likes warm ice cream.
12:46How's your job, Major Disaster?
12:47I got fired
12:48Just because I broke a couple of bowls.
12:51I lost my job, too.
12:53I didn't appreciate good music.
12:55Yuck!
12:56This is great!
12:58I've been going door-to-door
13:00And I sold five of these babies already.
13:02You might say I'm sweeping the town.
13:04That's great, Mom.
13:06What's your secret?
13:07I just get in the house
13:09And I tell them it's so heavy
13:10That I might have a heart attack
13:12If they make me take it out again.
13:14It's the old sympathy game.
13:16I thought the job said no heavy lifting.
13:18This is nothing!
13:20You should see the deluxe model.
13:22I've got lots more to sell.
13:24Let's go see how No-Zone is doing
13:26At Burble Burger.
13:28Hey, wait.
13:30I don't know where I am.
13:32Where am I?
13:34I always wondered
13:36Why this place had such bad service.
13:38Excuse me.
13:39Have you seen our friend No-Zone?
13:41You mean the funny-looking guy
13:43With the big nose
13:45Who sneezes all the time?
13:46Yeah.
13:47Never saw him.
13:50So where is he?
13:52I could be wrong.
13:54But I think he was taken to the laboratory
13:56Of an evil genius scientist.
13:58How do you know that?
14:00Because it says so right here.
14:01We took your friend to the laboratory
14:03Of the evil genius Dr. Bender.
14:05Come and get him.
14:06It's signed,
14:07Your pal, Dr. Kill-Em-Off.
14:13Eat it, magician.
14:15It's good for you.
14:16Hey, if it's that good,
14:17I'll eat it myself.
14:19Are you always this stupid?
14:22I don't know.
14:23Let me think.
14:24Never mind.
14:25Come on.
14:31What are you doing?
14:32Don't worry.
14:33We're just getting ready for your friends.
14:34They should be here any minute.
14:37Cool.
14:38A party.
14:39I'll make the dip.
14:40You are the dip.
14:43Yay!
14:44The good guys.
14:49Whoa!
14:52Do something!
14:54I'm trying.
14:55I'm trying.
14:58Wow, what a ride.
15:00You're not a very nice guy.
15:02Or couple of guys.
15:03Or whatever you are.
15:04Hey, how about some wrinkle cream, toxic crusader?
15:07Throw it.
15:08No, he's a cool superhero.
15:10Throw it!
15:11Throw it!
15:12No!
15:14All right already.
15:15I wish you'd stop doing that.
15:19Holy cow!
15:24You idiot!
15:27I give up.
15:31You did it.
15:32I did?
15:33I'm saved.
15:36I'm dead.
15:39Yoo-hoo, toxic crusader.
15:41I'm in here.
15:42I hope I don't get hurt.
15:45Yvonne's right.
15:46It needs work.
15:48Sneaky, Doc.
15:49Very sneaky.
15:54How do you like to be old?
15:57Hang on, buddy.
16:04Hurry!
16:08Doesn't look good, Doc.
16:14It's good to be Toxy.
16:16Hey, now that's catchy.
16:18Let's get out of here.
16:20Help!
16:23It thinks I'm lunch.
16:30Hold on, Nozo.
16:31We're coming.
16:32Thanks, Toxy.
16:34It was getting awful hot in there.
16:36Bye, hero.
16:37What in blazes is going on here, Nozone?
16:40It's this goo.
16:41It turns people into forgetful, nearsighted old folks.
16:44Say, this looks like the stuff Bonehead was spraying on the potatoes in Act One.
16:49That's right.
16:50And you know what they make out of potatoes, don't you?
16:52Sweaters?
16:53No, purple fries.
16:55The next time they eat, they'll be ordering off the seniors' menu.
16:59Special on purple fries.
17:01Loop from one, get your purple fries.
17:05Good.
17:06It's not too late.
17:07Yeah, no one's eaten any bad fries yet.
17:10The Toxic Crusaders!
17:12You guys, mind the store.
17:13I've got an evil plan to carry out.
17:15Attention, everyone.
17:17The evil genius Dr. Bender has put a chemical on the purple fries.
17:21If you eat them, you'll turn into forgetful, nearsighted old folks.
17:25Bounty!
17:32It works!
17:33I'm amazing!
17:34I'm an evil genius!
17:36Evil genius, huh?
17:38Hey, hiya, Toxy.
17:39Say, what's going on here, anyway?
17:41Is it Senior Citizens Day or something?
17:43Not now, Yvonne.
17:45I'm trying to beat up on a bad guy.
17:48Okay, Mr. Evil Genius.
17:50And the other guy, prepare to be seriously hurt.
17:53Uh, yeah, yeah.
17:54In a minute.
17:55Who's the rad babe?
17:58Who, Yvonne?
17:59She's my beautiful, though somewhat light, girlfriend.
18:02You've got a girlfriend?
18:04I may be a hideously deformed creature of superhuman size and strength,
18:08but I am a good guy.
18:10I knew we should have been a good guy.
18:12The bad guys never get the checks.
18:14That's the first smart thing you've said this whole episode.
18:18Say, ready for that beating now?
18:20Ah, forget that.
18:21We want to be good guys now.
18:23Yeah, we want to be toxic crustaceans like you guys,
18:26as long as we get to hang out with cool babes like Yvonne.
18:30Well, I can't promise anything, but she does have a sister.
18:33Good enough. We're good guys now.
18:35Not so fast.
18:37I mean, you're certainly hideously deformed enough,
18:40but I think you should at least come up with an antidote to help all these poor people
18:44before we let you be a toxic crustacean.
18:47Crusader.
18:48Whatever.
18:49But there is no antidote.
18:50I just love purple fries. Anybody want some?
18:53Yvonne, no!
18:56Hey, there's something wrong with these fries.
18:59Whoa!
19:00They taste like... like...
19:03Bubblegum!
19:05I don't get it.
19:06She ate the same fries as everyone else.
19:09Yeah, how come she's not old?
19:11I'll tell you a secret.
19:13I don't eat them plain.
19:14I like to put pepper on them.
19:16That's it. Pepper.
19:17Pepper is the antidote.
19:19It turns the Magoop 82 into bubblegum.
19:22I'm pretty tasty at that.
19:24Okay, I found the antidote.
19:26So are we toxic crusaders or what?
19:28Well, actually, Yvonne found the antidote.
19:31But what the hay?
19:33Rad!
19:35Attention, everyone.
19:36Put pepper on your fries and you'll turn back to normal.
19:43We'll help them later.
19:44We got to stop Dr. Killamoff from spraying all the vegetables with Magoop 82.
19:49Even the broccoli?
19:51Yep, even the broccoli.
19:54Now I am mad.
19:58In a few minutes, every vegetable will be covered with Magoop 82.
20:03And Troubleville will be mine.
20:05Unless the toxic crusaders come up with an antidote.
20:08You know, I'm really sick of you.
20:13We're too late. We'll never stop them.
20:16We're not done yet.
20:17What's that?
20:18Pepper.
20:19Oh, no. I hate pepper.
20:22Ready?
20:23Drop.
20:26Troubleville is mine.
20:28Next stop, the world.
20:32Give it all you got, buddy.
20:42Gesundheit.
20:43What's that? What's that?
20:44It looks like pee.
20:46It looks like antidote to me.
20:47No, no.
20:49Yes, yes.
20:53Yes.
20:58You did it, Nozo. You saved the vegetables.
21:01Even the broccoli.
21:10I hope everyone likes their vegetables well done.
21:16I hate those toxic crusaders.
21:20Now that you're a toxic crusader, what do we call you?
21:24Well, I'm Fender.
21:26I'm Fender.
21:27Gee, that kind of confused.
21:29We need just one name for both of you.
21:32That's it. We'll call you Headbanger.
21:36Why?
21:37And although it looks like none of us can hold down real jobs,
21:40except mom, of course,
21:42we have our newest crusader to thank for inventing the product
21:45that's going to make us all rich and famous.
21:47Gentlemen.
21:48Introducing the newest, the best,
21:51the killest bubblegum ever invented.
21:54We call it Magoop 83.
21:57I even wrote a new jingle.
21:59Oh, yeah, Magoop 83.
22:01It's a bubblegum for me.
22:03Blow bubbles big and bold,
22:05and it won't make you old.
22:10Oh, yeah, Magoop 83.
22:12It's a bubblegum for me.
22:14Blow bubbles big and bold,
22:16and it won't make you old.
22:19Oh, yeah, Magoop 83.
22:21It's a bubblegum for me.
22:23Blow bubbles big and bold,
22:25and it won't make you old.
22:30bass & drums play rock
23:00bass & drums play rock