[Funny, Horror] Exmortis 2 - WORST JUMPSCARE EVER ;_; - Part 1
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GamingTranscript
00:00There we go, I mean how's it going bros, my name is PewDiePie, welcome to Xmartist 2,
00:25that's a 2, with a peace sign, I'm really not ready for this, like, I don't think there's
00:30any way to be ready for this, hmm, ok I'm ready for this, if you guys are in the society
00:42sorry you're not ready for this, sorry kids, oh, haha, alright, oh, oh bro, I nearly choked
00:52on cupcakes, alright, Laflaweb and something, I ban Laflaweb, dingly dingly, I don't like
01:04dingly dingly, it sounds like I need a lot of penis or something, I don't, I'm just kidding,
01:09where's my drink, it's a pretentious thing, alright, here we go, Xmartist, this is supposed
01:19to be scarier than the first one, you know, scarier than the first one, haha, ah, that's
01:27impossible, anyway, the horse of Xmartist swept across the earth, a plague unlike anything
01:33humanity had ever encountered, in their final stand, a handful of mankind's last survivors
01:39stood their ground, defiant of their inevitable fate, and in those last moments, as death
01:45took those brave souls, a stranger passing in the distance put his pants, plants in motions,
01:52ok, hmm, where is your god now, I don't, I don't even know anymore, but that's, I would
02:01say he's in the church, this is abandoned, this doll leads inside, I hope to get beyond,
02:05this is the one we would find in the final stand against Xmartist, oh wow, it's like
02:10the last boss, holy shit, oh Jesus, the sight of Christ in the exact room which was fun,
02:20huh, is that me, nah, it can't be me, what the fuck, where's he going, where you going
02:29bro, hey, don't run away from me, oh, that's fucking creepy, oh, ok, let's just look around,
02:39see what Jesus has to say to us, nothing, uh, whatever, just walked in, entered in a
02:47professional booth, and doesn't seem to want me, let me in to his particular booth, let's
02:52go here then, oh god, hey bro, hey bro, looking back at me, what do you want, hey bro, I have
03:01a secret, I have a boner, a tiger just took a bath, oh, cool, cool, sorry bro, what, oh
03:20god, that's not good, oh no, oh god, oh god, Jesus, save me yourself, alright, you look
03:38damn good, can we kiss between this, I know it's like a distance but, pretty cool, I never
03:45kissed anyone between a booth before, please do it, please do it for me, yes, yes, enough
03:54about mankind's fate, I just wanna kiss ya, alright, I'll make the right choices, I'm
04:02pewdiepie, what the heck do you want from me, alright, let's go, what's going on, let's
04:09go further I guess, can I go in here, all the windows look like they're boarded up long
04:13time to keep something out, that's not good, should I go back, maybe, now why would you
04:20want to ruin a game with, no, oh wow, alright, hey, what the fuck, prophecy of the hand,
04:31one night I dreamed, that little fucker, a darkness one, oh god, it's gonna be 50 pages
04:37again, oh I can actually read this, a dark once dormant and impatiently waiting was now
04:43emerging from the shadow, a light growing brighter from beyond the dark chasm, wrapping
04:48around a pillar stained with ancient penises, that's old penises, many a million of shrieks
04:54and screams engulfed me when I stood, until I felt the burn rise up from the floor and it consumed
05:00me, my soul ripped from my shelf, was flattened and became a penis, it became a link between the
05:07ancient world and my reality, that's amazing, unspeakable penises crossed over and began
05:13devouring every living penis, and then a fiend of unspeakables, and the mother looked at me and
05:22smiled, and the penis smiled, that was amazing, as it crossed into my world, I know what he
05:27means when it crossed into my world, alright, he introduced himself as the ancient of the ex
05:31mortis, of life, that's a pretty cool penis name, I mean I'm still thinking of my penis,
05:37oh god, it continues, I look at myself, Dr. De Morgan man, and stuff, alright, cool,
05:44I don't care, can I go back, alright, let's go, please let me use time, oh god,
05:54this is gonna be like a 50 minute play, oh god, I love cheating, no I never cheat, I mean what,
06:00come on Jesus, tell me what to do, just don't hang there, Jesus Christ, Jesus Christ just don't hang
06:06there, no that's not funny, am I sitting in here or what, can I go or what, it keeps going like,
06:15I don't even know anymore, each pew, each pew, really, they're talking about me,
06:21yes I won't ruin the game, Jesus Christ, ah, ah prophecy, I see myself and don't dare to dream
06:31about horror, I don't get it, alright, can I go or what, I don't understand,
06:40I don't want to ruin this game, alright, super click, super click, super click, super click,
06:46oh what is this, I wouldn't know, what is this, what is this, what is this, what is this,
06:50what is this, what is this, what is this, I can find you, super good at cheating,
06:55ah why'd you go in here bruh, what about this, something else we can click here,
07:00something else maybe, no, I don't even know anymore,
07:06fuck does that thing keep blinking, I don't understand,
07:10I don't understand, quite frankly I think I'm gonna cheat, alright, wait where is it,
07:15more it is, there it is, alright, apparently I'm supposed to click this door, I don't know,
07:19I missed the fucking door, but anyway, let's go, take the car, oh looky looky,
07:24running out is gonna help, the x-mortem will be on me like a flash, I wouldn't last 30 seconds,
07:28fuck, fuck, fuck, think fool, think, of course I use this to fight the x-mortis, makes sense,
07:36ah come on, the chat tab is beautiful, oh god, the cars are getting closer,
07:44a church rear, what is this, what is this, oh god, he's coming, he's coming, oh fuck,
07:52alright, how do I go back, I was just kidding, go back, inside, the glass, oh god,
08:02oh, use it, use that on the man up, ah, I don't even know, oh, I swear it wasn't me,
08:12oh, oh bro, oh bro, I'm sorry, oh, he looks happy, oh god, is he coming here,
08:24oh, oh bro, oh bro, no, play again from the start, ah man,
08:33oh no, no bro, alright, what am I supposed to do with this, I don't, I just, hello,
08:39I'm like, no, I don't want to make out, why do every monster wants to make out with me,
08:44I don't even know anymore, ah, fuck, this little thingly thingy, there's supposed to be,
08:50yep, I got the keys, I just knew that we're gonna be there for some, oh god, better hurry,
08:54let's go, let's go straight the hell out of here, I don't care about x-mortis,
08:59I'm just gonna go, it's pretty fucking dark though, hey, what's going on, Xavius legacy,
09:07I just ran, this is lucky, I feel it's documents from the church,
09:13what possible significance it plays out, let's go,
09:18ah, cool, falling paintings, alright, that seems like a very old part of a man named
09:26small garbage house, yeah, where's his rape girl, I'm saying you need a rape girl, alright,
09:31the code is usually penis, oh, it's with numbers, oh, that's difficult, alright,
09:39let's go upstairs, why the fuck not, I'm just saying, oh god, corridors, oh, oh bro,
09:48alright, this door first, oh, period everywhere, Jesus Christ, when will girls know,
09:56oh, more period, oh, when will they learn to control their period, oh, it's everywhere,
10:06oh, fucking penis, alright, fine, I'll go here, oh, period, oh, period everywhere,
10:14what about this one, can I go there, I can't,
10:16fucking fuck, I have to investigate the period apparently, oh, that's fucking great,
10:20I don't trust, is there poo there, I don't, fucking flush toilets and shit,
10:29I'm trying to place, there we go, alright, this looks like the most pleasant thing,
10:34so I'm just gonna, oh, there we go, the book of ex-mortis, well, I was digging around in
10:39the dusty old cell today and I came across a whole heap of old leather bound blah blah blah,
10:44that was pretty cool, sorry brah,
10:50do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do,
10:57down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down, clicking everything,
11:05oh god, they're children, no matter how many times I bear witness to be honest,
11:10children, god damn it, I'd have to be children, hey, let's burn them, I'm just kidding, actually,
11:16I wasn't, alright, let's go, can I burn that little girl, bloodbath, no, American, no,
11:29majors, oh no, oh no, judgment day is here, ah, a key for me, cool, no hope, let's see about that,
11:39it's so old it's so big, alright, let's see about here, let's place poo, and there,
11:48poo flush the toilet, ah, cool brah, alright, let's see, no, what are we gonna do with a
11:55fucking lighter in it, alright, let's go down, let's go to disco, ah, here we go, what is this,
12:03crawlspace, it's too dark, ah, that's where the lighter comes in, oh god, I don't like this,
12:12oh, oh, no, no, ah, ah, my toe, my everything, I, no, no, I don't, no,
12:25no, ah, ah, shut up, I don't care, shut up, alright, ah, no,
12:38oh man, that bitch cut me good, bitch cut me good,
12:42real good, she was like, hey, let's make out, and I'm like, no, I have a girlfriend, ah, fuck,
12:47oh, bro, bro,
13:01I think that was it for scary games for me today, bros, um, yeah, like, if you want to,
13:11you better fucking left, I'm gonna get a heart attack one of these days, if I continue doing
13:16these, I swear, I'm gonna make a pretty sweet video though, uh, and you'll probably get to see
13:22my girlfriend in it, anyway, um, hope you enjoyed, and I'll see you tomorrow, bye,
13:46shut up, and sleep with me, come on, like, don't you sleep with me, shut up,
13:51and sleep with me, come on, and sleep with me, shut up,