I Gave Birth As A Man & It Wasn't For 'Attention' | MY EXTRAORDINARY FAMILY
KAYDEN gave birth to both his children. The transgender father, educator and content creator has two daughters -10-year-old Azaelia and three-year-old Jurnee. Kayden found out he was pregnant with Azaelia when he was already five-months along while with Jurnee he found out when he was several weeks pregnant. The 38-year-old said: “My pregnancy journeys were similar in the sense that they were both surprises and also in the aspect that I had to navigate medical spaces and deal with a lot of transphobia within maternal spaces.” Kayden knew he was transgender when he was about 19-years-old and through his transition his style has evolved as he has become more comfortable and promotes body positivity. Both his daughters know he gave birth to them and has explained about being transgender too with Azaelia being able to understand more now she’s older. He said: “I've been telling her that I was trans, without necessarily using the word trans, since she was able to understand words.” Kayden has experienced a lot of negativity through sharing his experiences with people saying his children should be ‘taken away’ from him and he’s ‘depriving them of having a mother’. He added: “I've also been told that I am an abomination, a demon. The list goes on and on. I get negative comments literally daily.” Kayden wants to teach his children to love themselves, be happy and to tell other transgender parents that they are deserving.
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00:00I was a baby in my daddy's tummy.
00:03I gave birth to both my daughters.
00:07Trolls have said that I should have my children taken away from me.
00:10I'll get a lot of, oh those poor kids.
00:13Them saying that my kids are going to grow up confused.
00:16That I'm depriving them of having a mother.
00:19So how did your dad explain to you that he is transgender?
00:25You really want pancakes.
00:26I don't have any pancakes mix.
00:28I have waffles.
00:31You want waffles?
00:32My name is Caden Coleman.
00:33I'm a father of two.
00:36My daughters are Azealia who's 10 and Journey who is 3, almost 4.
00:40Take two out.
00:43These are cold.
00:44Yes.
00:46Who is that behind you?
00:47Uh, his daddy.
00:50What's daddy?
00:52I was a baby in my daddy's tummy.
00:54I was kicking.
00:56You were kicking?
00:57Yeah, he didn't want me to get in his tummy.
01:02I found out I was pregnant with Azealia in September of 2013 when I was five and a half
01:08months pregnant.
01:09I was shocked.
01:10I was taken aback.
01:13I was unprepared.
01:15But I was also really excited.
01:17I found out I was pregnant with Journey in January of 2020 and I was about seven weeks
01:21pregnant at that point.
01:23And then can you put two more in there for sister?
01:26Well, uh, Azealia, who's a better cook?
01:29You or your dad?
01:34Dad?
01:37Yes.
01:38I can't cook!
01:41My pregnancy with Azealia was insane.
01:45I went from not knowing I was pregnant at all to finding out I was pregnant and then
01:49being like super pregnant.
01:50But I was thrown into trying to like figure out pregnancy.
01:56My pregnancy journeys were similar in the sense that they were both surprises and also
02:01in the aspect that I had to navigate medical spaces and deal with a lot of like transphobia
02:08within maternal spaces.
02:10I'm going to show y'all my shoe collection and my closet, basically.
02:18And apparently my child.
02:20I love fashion and different styles of clothes.
02:24My personal style is very emotional.
02:28And what I mean by that is my style changes based on how I'm feeling.
02:35When did you know you were trans?
02:38I think I was around 19 when I knew that I was transgender.
02:45I found the verbiage for it in like 2006, 2007.
02:50Before I transitioned, I felt kind of out of alignment with myself.
02:54Has your style evolved throughout your transition journey?
02:58My style has absolutely evolved.
03:01I've gotten further in my transition and a lot more comfortable with myself.
03:06I find myself really being open to trying new like styles of clothes like, you know,
03:15very risque things.
03:17I'm also very big into body positivity.
03:20I don't actually have anything from when I was pregnant.
03:26Honestly, during pregnancy, being that there aren't maternity clothes for trans men,
03:33I just wore my regular clothes bigger.
03:40Well, what are you painting?
03:42What are you drawing?
03:43I'm painting a slug.
03:46A slug?
03:47Yeah.
03:47Are you drawing a flower?
03:49Azalea and Journey are characters.
03:53We have to face that the world kind of sucks, and especially for Black women, which they are.
03:59But they are outspoken, confident, intelligent beings that I am super proud of.
04:09How would you describe your dad?
04:12My dad is bald, but he has style.
04:18He knows how to do my hair.
04:21He's fun.
04:23What does transgender mean?
04:26Like definition-wise?
04:28Yeah, kind of like.
04:30How would you describe it?
04:32I would describe it as a person changing themselves the way they want.
04:39Or expressing how they feel.
04:43So how did your dad explain to you that he is transgender?
04:48I don't know how he did it.
04:50I can't remember.
04:51But he just started explaining it, and then he never stopped.
04:55He never did.
04:56He's going to keep going.
04:57Yeah, I've been telling her that I was trans without necessarily using the word trans,
05:03since she was able to understand words, which is probably why she doesn't remember an exact moment.
05:11It was never like a sit-down.
05:12I know a lot of people are like, oh my god, that must be so confusing.
05:16But I'm also, at the same time, showing them pictures of myself when I was a kid.
05:22And I'd be like, daddy used to be a girl like you.
05:24And as they get older, they start asking questions.
05:27Like Azalea started asking, why didn't you want to be a girl?
05:30And I'd be like, well, did you want to be a boy?
05:32Do you want to be a boy?
05:33And she'd be like, no.
05:34And I'd be like, in that same aspect, I didn't feel comfortable being a girl.
05:38And it's just like, oh, okay, I get it.
05:43Hey, y'all.
05:44Use this post, and in the comments, I will be answering a few questions.
05:49All right, let's go.
05:50Okay, the question is, would you have more children via surrogate adoption or fostering?
05:55No, I will not be having any more kids via surrogate adoption, fostering.
06:02No.
06:02Do your kids have someone they call mom?
06:04This is a question I get often.
06:06They don't have anybody that they call mom, as in mother.
06:10But they definitely have motherly figures in their life.
06:14I decided to share my story on social media when I was pregnant with Azalea.
06:19I took like five more pregnancy tests because I just didn't believe it.
06:24And I was five and a half months pregnant because I hadn't seen any representation
06:28of Black trans men who gave birth.
06:30I decided to do a weekly pregnancy struggle segment.
06:35I'm literally attached to a thousand different things right now.
06:38It is mostly educational and a lot of storytelling.
06:42And I also educate via clapbacks, which people tend to love.
06:46I've experienced a ton of negativity since sharing my story.
06:49I've had someone tell me that they were literally going to call CPS on me.
06:54I'll get a lot of, oh, those poor kids.
06:58I feel so sorry for them.
07:00Saying that my kids are going to grow up confused,
07:02that I'm depriving them of having a mother.
07:06Just yesterday, somebody said they hope that my plane crashes when I was getting on a flight.
07:11And I've also been told that I am an abomination, a demon.
07:18The list goes on and on.
07:19I get negative comments literally daily.
07:22I take everything with a grain of salt until it comes to my kids.
07:25I think me being trans, people just think that I'm automatically bad for my kids
07:32and that CPS will come and take them, which is false.
07:38I think there's a lack of education about being transgender because for so long,
07:44the entire LGBTQIA plus community had been suppressed.
07:48My online community, they have rallied behind me in ways that I,
07:54it still to this day shocks me how they've shown up for me.
07:58The message I would like to give to other transgender parents is that you're deserving.
08:04You're deserving of a family.
08:06I hope to teach my children that it's okay to be yourself in the face of adversity
08:13and that the most important love that they will ever experience is their own.
08:20I just want my kids to be happy.
08:25Bye.