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Category

😹
Fun
Transcript
00:00I have endeavoured in this ghostly little tale to raise the ghost of an idea which shall not put my
00:12viewers out of humour with themselves, with each other, with the season or with me. May it haunt
00:25their houses pleasantly.
00:55I have endeavoured in this ghostly little tale to raise the ghost of an idea which shall not put my
01:02viewers out of humour with themselves, with each other, with the season or with me. May it haunt their
01:09houses pleasantly. May it haunt their houses pleasantly.
01:25Dead.
01:55Ah, but he was a tight-fisted hand at the grindstone. Scrooge, a squeezing, wrenching, grasping,
02:23scraping, clutching, covetous old sinner. Hard and sharp as flint, secret and self-contained, and solitary
02:34as an oyster. Heat and cold had little influence on Scrooge. No warmth could warm, no wintry weather
02:44kill him. No wind of blue was more bitter than he. Nobody stopped him in the street with glabs and looks.
02:57My dear Scrooge, how are you? Even the blind man's dogs appeared to know him, and would pull their owners
03:08away. No eye at all than an evil eye, they appeared to say. But what did Scrooge care? It was the very thing he
03:19liked. Edge his way along the crowded paths of life, warning all human sympathy, keep your distance.
03:37Christmas! Could that be Christmas?
04:07Be a more happy and heartwarming time. The coldest heart could not be but bored at the sight of children running,
04:21playing with their unfettered hearts. It is indeed the season to be jolly, and to bear good will to all men.
04:33Oh my God! It's Moe Muppet! Guys, look! It's Moe Muppet!
04:41What the? Who's this? How did she get in here?
04:47Oh my God! Moe, I am one of your biggest fans. Is it okay if I have an autograph from you?
04:56Oh, that's it, right. I'm out of here. I'm a professional, I shouldn't have to deal with this. Get rid of these kids!
05:05Kill that camera!
05:09That's my friend. Sorry, it won't happen again.
05:14Oh, I know it won't happen again, Godfather. You're fired.
05:17Man, I'm trying to make a film here about it's important to be nice at Christmas and I'm fed up with all this.
05:47I don't know what's going on here.
05:53Okay, Christmas is a great time to be nice to your family.
05:58Christmas is a time of great joy.
06:02It's a time of joy. It's a time of joy.
06:06Christmas is a time of joy. It's a time of joy.
06:10It's a time of joy.
06:13It's a time of joy.
06:16It's a time of joy.
06:19It's a time of joy.
06:22It's a time of joy.
06:25It's a time of joy.
06:28It's a time of joy.
06:31It's a time of joy.
06:34It's a time of joy.
06:41A Merry Christmas, Uncle. God bless you.
06:47Bah, humbug.
06:50Christmas a humbug, Uncle? You don't mean that.
06:56Oh, I do.
06:59Merry Christmas.
07:02What reason have you to be merry?
07:04Merry Christmas.
07:07What reason have you to be merry? You're poor enough.
07:12What reason have you to be miserable? You're rich enough.
07:18What else can I be when I live in such a world of fools as this?
07:24What's Christmas to you but a time for paying bills without money?
07:29Finding yourself a year older but not an hour richer?
07:35If I could work my will, every idiot with Merry Christmas on his lips
07:42would be boiled in his own pudding and buried with a stick of holly through his heart.
07:47Uncle?
07:50Nephew, keep Christmas in your way. Let me keep it in mine.
07:58But you don't keep it.
08:01Let me leave it alone then. Much good it may do you. Much good has it ever done you.
08:09But Uncle, Christmas time is a good time. A kind, forgiving, charitable, pleasant time.
08:17The only time in the long calendar of the year when men and women open up their shut-up hearts freely
08:24and think of other people as fellow life travelers, not a separate race bound on other journeys.
08:32Therefore, Uncle, though it has never put a scrap of gold in my pocket,
08:38I believe it has done me good, will do me good, and I say, God bless it!
08:45Uncle, come dine with us tomorrow.
08:49Humbug, you and your wife, why so ever did you get married?
08:59Why? Because I fell in love.
09:04Love? Humbug, the only thing more ridiculous than Merry Christmas. Good afternoon.
09:14Uncle, I'll keep my Christmas humor to the very last. Merry Christmas!
09:21Good afternoon.
09:27At the festive season, men of good will decide to make provision for the poor.
09:34Two such kindly souls were the next visitors to Scrooge and Marley's.
09:41Good afternoon. Do I have the pleasure of addressing Mr. Scrooge or Mr. Marley?
09:47Mr. Marley has been dead these seven years. Seven years this very night.
09:58Ah, well, I have no doubt his charitable spirit lives on in your good self.
10:03At this time, it is more than usually desirable that we should make provisions for the poor and destitute
10:09to suffer greatly from one of the most basic comforts.
10:13Are there no prisons? Does the workhouse no longer exist?
10:20They are, sadly, still with us, sir. Yes.
10:24The treadmill and the poor law remains in vigor.
10:29Both very busy, sir.
10:32Well, I was afraid they'd ceased their wondrous course.
10:38Gentlemen, good afternoon. I prefer to be alone.
10:44I can little afford to make merry myself, and if I can afford to make idle people merry,
10:50let the idle partake of those establishments you assure me still thrive.
10:56Sir, many would rather die.
10:59If they would rather die, they'd better do it.
11:04And according to the laws of the world, they'd better die.
11:08Sir, many would rather die.
11:11If they would rather die, they'd better do it.
11:15And decrease the surplus population. Good afternoon.
11:19But, sir, I... I...
11:22Good afternoon.
11:25It is tempting to think that Scrooge found no joy in life.
11:31But Scrooge enjoyed being mean.
11:35Scrooge enjoyed every opportunity to trample on another man's spirit.
11:41This brings us to his long-suffering servant, Bob Cratchit.
11:47Bob Cratchit expected little out of life, asked for little, and got little.
11:53Today, he was to ask Scrooge for a day off for Christmas.
12:03Christmas! Ah, Mark!
12:08Christmas!
12:12Christmas! Ah, Mark!
12:29You'll want all day tomorrow, I suppose.
12:34If it should suit your convenience, sir.
12:37It's not convenience, nor is it fair.
12:41If I was to stop half a crown for it, you'd find yourself ill-used, no doubt.
12:49But, Mr. Scrooge, sir, tis but one day of the year.
12:55A poor excuse for pecking a man's pocket.
12:59Go. Be here all the earlier of the next morning.
13:07Yes, sir. Mr. Scrooge, sir. Thank you, sir.
13:16Oh, Scrooge. How cold and empty is your world.
13:24And yet, love and kindness is all around you, if only you'd open your eyes.
13:30Let us visit Bob Cratchit and Tiny Tim, and see some such love and kindness.
13:38As was the case for many, life was not always easy for the Cratchit family.
13:45Tiny Tim's leg was lame, and his health was always poor.
13:51Despite this, Tiny Tim's thoughts rarely dwelled on himself.
13:55Indeed, he thought often of others.
14:02I enjoyed the church service so much today, Father. The singing was wonderful.
14:08So did I, Tim. So joyful and harmonious.
14:13And Tim, I said you can call me Bob when we're alone.
14:17Just don't tell your mother. She'd buy me a treacle and sell me to Scrooge as a pudding.
14:21Oh, Father. L-O-L.
14:24It's Bob. And whatever is L-O-L?
14:28It's a new word I made up. Like it?
14:31Hmm. It'll let her catch on, my lad.
14:37Bob, this may sound peculiar.
14:40Do tell me, Tim.
14:43Well, you know, sometimes people stare at me, because I'm crippled.
14:48Well, you know, sometimes people stare at me, because I'm crippled.
14:52I do, Tim. I wish they didn't.
14:54But I fear some people don't know how to use the brains that God gave them.
14:58And it does vex me so.
15:00No, Bob. Don't be vexed. I was good.
15:04Maybe at this time, when people may be sad,
15:07it may lift their spirits to know, well, at least they aren't crippled.
15:12And by lifting their hearts, they won't lose them who go in this world.
15:17Oh, Tim. You raise my spirits with every passing moment.
15:21I love you more than anything in God's creation.
15:24There is not one thing that I change.
15:26Not one blessed thing. And that's the truth.
15:47Round yon virgin mother and child
15:54Holy infant so tender and mild
16:01Sleep in heavenly peace
16:08Sleep in heavenly peace
16:13Humbug.
16:17Scrooge took his usual melancholy meal
16:21in a melancholy tavern
16:23with a melancholy drink.
16:27At the end of this night of wild revelry,
16:30Scrooge returned to his home,
16:32formerly the property of his business partner,
16:35Jacob Marley.
16:38Jacob Marley had not so much as entered Scrooge's head
16:42in the seven years since his death.
16:45Tonight was to be very different.
17:05So very, very different.
17:09Darkness was cheap, which well suited Scrooge.
17:13But he was so unsettled from the apparition,
17:16he sought comfort in an extra candle.
17:20The comfort would not last.
17:39No!
18:00Scrooge!
18:03Who are you?
18:05What do you want of me?
18:07You aren't real!
18:10Ask who I was!
18:12I am Jacob Marley.
18:15I want you to believe in me.
18:19Why do you doubt your own senses?
18:25Because a little thing can affect them.
18:29A slight disorder of the stomach makes them cheat.
18:32You may be an undigested bit of beef,
18:36a blot of mustard,
18:38a crumb of cheese.
18:40Yes, there's more gravy
18:43than the grave of love chills.
18:51Mercy!
18:53Why do you trump me?
18:59Spirit, I do.
19:06Spirit, I do. I do.
19:10Spirit, why do you walk the earth?
19:14And why come to me?
19:18It is required of man that his spirit
19:21be made to dance among his fellow man.
19:24And if he not do so in life,
19:26he is condemned to do so in death.
19:30Who is me?
19:36Spirit, why are you so chained?
19:41In exchange for your own chained life.
19:46As have you, and even more so,
19:50since your suffering made this mind hectic,
19:54your chains bear so much load.
20:00Jacob, I pray thee,
20:03please speak comfort to me.
20:08I have naught to give thee.
20:11I can but say,
20:13you are my greatest asset for your life.
20:17But Jacob,
20:19you are such a good man of business.
20:23How good was my business
20:25How good was my business
20:27When a merchant of mercy
20:30like you
20:32outplayed my business.
20:36But it was the way
20:38you would be haunted by these spirits.
20:43These spirits
20:45are the only hope
20:48for every businessman.
20:51For all business.
20:55For all business.
21:00Whose house?
21:03Ron's house.
21:06Whose house?
21:08Ron's house.
21:11Whose house?
21:13Say what?
21:15Ron's house.
21:17Hey, uh,
21:19Muppet, you got a minute?
21:21Well, if it's to pull your finger,
21:23no, no I don't.
21:25But I wanted to talk to you about that
21:27gravy line.
21:29What, there's more of gravy than the Gravy Ballet?
21:32Yeah, great line. Classic.
21:35Yeah, it's a great line. Classic.
21:38But maybe it, uh...
21:41What?
21:43Well, maybe not great.
21:45More like it sucks.
21:48What?
21:50Yeah, I think we should drop it.
21:53And while we're at it,
21:55fire the scriptwriter.
21:57Fire the scriptwriter.
21:59You do know that line was in the original, right?
22:03Oh, yeah, yeah.
22:07Uh, original?
22:10Uh, so, I didn't write this?
22:13It's an all-time classic.
22:15It's up there with Shakespeare.
22:18It's by Charles Dickens?
22:20Dickens?
22:24Yeah, I knew that.
22:26You can't beat that old Charlie...
22:28Good old Charles Hickens.
22:31Dickens.
22:34Oh, right.
22:36Dickens.
22:38Oh, and one more thing.
22:40Pull my finger?
22:43You're an idiot.
22:51Marley's ghost bothered Scrooge.
22:54Bothered him extremely.
22:58Scrooge paced his song.
23:01Was it a dream? Was it a dream?
23:05No, Scrooge.
23:07It was no dream.
23:20Underneath the script!
23:26Underneath the script!
23:33Are you the spirit whose coming was foretold to me?
23:38I am.
23:40Who and what are you?
23:45I am the ghost of Christmas Past.
23:49Rise.
23:51Come with me.
24:18There are those in this cynical world
24:22who doubt the magic.
24:25I invite you to leave the story for a moment.
24:31To go to your window or step outside
24:36and look at the night sky.
24:40Do you see a star brighter than the rest?
24:43A bright light travelling?
24:44It's Christmas Eve.
24:47It's Christmas Eve.
24:49Look out your window.
24:51Be ready. Be waiting.
24:53You may see the ghost of Christmas Past.