Me & You, Us, Forever (2007)

  • 2 months ago
A love story based in 1974 and 2004: A 47-year-old Christian man on the other side of an unwanted divorce reminisces about his high-school girlfriend from 30 years prior.

Director
Dave Christiano
Writer
Dave Christiano
Stars
Michael Blain-Rozgay, Stacey J. Aswad, Hugh McLean

*
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Transcript
00:00:00Thank you so much for having me.
00:00:30You're welcome.
00:00:50Remember now girls, you're staying with your mom this weekend.
00:00:52We're supposed to be with you.
00:00:54I know, but we switched a few weeks back. She had somewhere to go.
00:00:57Oh yeah, I forgot.
00:00:58Girls know where she went?
00:00:59She went to see some man.
00:01:00Michelle.
00:01:01Some man who?
00:01:02We don't know, Dad. We never met him.
00:01:04It's about the tenth one, isn't it?
00:01:06What, Dad?
00:01:07Nothing.
00:01:08I'm sorry, Dad. I didn't mean to.
00:01:10I know. It's okay.
00:01:12Come on, let's get going. I don't want your girls late for school.
00:01:29Morning, Dad.
00:01:51Morning, Sue.
00:01:52She called at 8-0-1.
00:01:53Was she mad?
00:01:54No, she was in a good mood.
00:01:56She said hello and even asked how I was doing.
00:01:58She must want something.
00:02:02No, I can take it.
00:02:05No, I'm sure.
00:02:07Okay, well...
00:02:11Bye.
00:02:16Wants me to take another weekend for her.
00:02:18This time no switching.
00:02:21Must be in love.
00:02:23Must be.
00:02:24You okay?
00:02:27Not really.
00:02:31Sue?
00:02:32Yeah?
00:02:35Do you ever get used to this?
00:02:37Used to it? Yes.
00:02:39Like it?
00:02:41No.
00:02:48You know, it still hurts me every time I think about it.
00:02:51I'm sorry, man.
00:02:53It's just not right.
00:02:55It's never been right, it's never going to be right.
00:02:57Well, maybe you should try to avoid her.
00:03:00I do.
00:03:01Most of the time I don't see her the way the custody is set up,
00:03:04but every once in a while we run into each other.
00:03:07She knows it hurts me when I see her.
00:03:09Oh, if she knows it hurts you, I'm sure she arranges it once in a while.
00:03:13You know what she does?
00:03:14When I've got the girls and she calls to talk to them at night,
00:03:17instead of calling me from her cell phone,
00:03:19she'll call me from her boyfriend's phone
00:03:21and pop up and call her ID.
00:03:23It's just Adele was using her, man.
00:03:25He's just trying to tear you up inside.
00:03:27He's doing a really good job of it, let me tell you.
00:03:31You know Dave, maybe it's time you try and meet someone else.
00:03:36You are free to remarry.
00:03:38I don't know.
00:03:41You should try and get out a little more.
00:03:43Get involved with a singles group or something.
00:03:46I don't think so.
00:03:48Probably do you a lot of good.
00:03:50That's not me.
00:03:53Well, hang in there. You're going to make it.
00:03:56God's going to see you through.
00:03:58Sometimes I wonder.
00:04:00Hey, when we get the contract with the Klein group,
00:04:03that'll make you feel better.
00:04:05Oh right, like the contract of the century is going to make me feel all better.
00:04:08It can't hurt.
00:04:09We'll see if they go for it.
00:04:11They're going to go for it. It's very fair.
00:04:13It's fair alright, but these guys don't want fair, do they?
00:04:16They want to have the edge.
00:04:18Yeah, you got that right.
00:04:20But I think God's going to make it happen.
00:04:22I got a good feeling about this.
00:04:24And we'll know soon enough. Tomorrow is June 2nd and that is the deadline.
00:04:28We should know something first thing in the morning.
00:04:31What did you just say?
00:04:33We should know first thing in the morning.
00:04:35No, no. What day it was.
00:04:37June 2nd.
00:04:43Why? What about it?
00:04:46Well June 2nd was the day I broke up with my old high school girlfriend.
00:04:50You still remember the date?
00:04:53Yeah. She was my first love.
00:04:59First love, huh?
00:05:02Name was Mary.
00:05:05Did you ever have a girlfriend in high school?
00:05:08Not really.
00:05:10I played football and there was this girl named Regina.
00:05:14We dated on and off a little but nothing serious.
00:05:17I mean, I was a lineman.
00:05:19Not many girls get excited about dating a lineman, if you know what I mean.
00:05:23Mary was a cheerleader.
00:05:25And what were you? A running back?
00:05:27Me? No, I didn't play football.
00:05:29I ran cross country and track.
00:05:31So how'd you get the cheerleader then?
00:05:33What are you talking about? Us runners got all the checks.
00:05:37Z... E... B... U.
00:05:43Zeeboo?
00:05:45And that is a triple letter score on the Z.
00:05:49Zeeboo's a word?
00:05:51Sure it is.
00:05:53What does Zeeboo mean?
00:05:55What do I look like, a dictionary here?
00:05:57I don't know what all the Z words mean.
00:05:59I just know that I memorized a bunch of them once.
00:06:01It's a word.
00:06:04Ashley, is Zeeboo a word?
00:06:06No, he's just making it up.
00:06:08Your father got straight A's in English and spelling all through school.
00:06:11I'm not making anything up.
00:06:13Yes you are. Zeeboo is not a word.
00:06:15Zebra is, but not Zeeboo.
00:06:17Hey, hey, hey, young lady.
00:06:19That is my word and I'm leaving it.
00:06:22It's an animal overseas somewhere.
00:06:24Challenge him. He's trying to trick you.
00:06:27I'm not trying to trick anybody.
00:06:29I'm going to challenge you.
00:06:31Okay.
00:06:33But if you challenge and you're wrong, you lose a turn.
00:06:36And you probably lose the game.
00:06:45I'm challenging.
00:06:47Tried to warn you.
00:06:54Hello?
00:06:56Hold on just a minute. It's your mom.
00:07:02Hey mom.
00:07:04I don't believe it.
00:07:06You are so lucky.
00:07:08There is no such thing as luck.
00:07:10It's an animal, isn't it?
00:07:12Yes, a mammal of Africa and Asia.
00:07:15Dad.
00:07:26Did you hear the news?
00:07:28They signed the contract.
00:07:30How did you know?
00:07:32I didn't. You just told me.
00:07:34They signed the contract.
00:07:36Aren't you excited?
00:07:38Yeah, that's good.
00:07:40That's good? What do you mean? That's great.
00:07:42Do you remember that girl I told you about yesterday?
00:07:45What girl?
00:07:47Mary.
00:07:48The old girlfriend?
00:07:49Yeah.
00:07:50I was flipping through the stations on the way into work this morning
00:07:53and I heard a song from 1974 that was our song.
00:07:57Now what do you think the chances of that happening are?
00:08:00I don't know, but who cares? The contract.
00:08:03Come on man, it brought back a lot of good memories.
00:08:06We just landed the biggest marketing deal in the history of this company
00:08:11and you're thinking about some high school girl?
00:08:14Not just some girl, Paul.
00:08:16She was the greatest.
00:08:18January 5, 1974 is the day we met.
00:08:22We lived in different towns, about three miles apart.
00:08:26My cousin played for her high school basketball team.
00:08:29He was a junior and so was she.
00:08:31I was a senior.
00:08:33He arranged for me to meet her at one of the games
00:08:35so I talked to her a little bit that night
00:08:37and then I called her the next day and asked her out.
00:08:40She said yes.
00:08:42That's how it all started.
00:08:44I remember telling my brother on February 5, just one month later
00:08:47that I would never, ever break up with this girl.
00:08:50That she was the most perfect, beautiful girl in the world for me.
00:08:54So you broke up with her?
00:08:56We dated for two years, four months and 28 days.
00:08:59Yeah, I broke up with her.
00:09:00Which was June 2, the day this company landed its biggest contract.
00:09:04No, it was June 2, 1976, the day I was a total idiot
00:09:08and let go of the greatest thing I ever had.
00:09:11I should have married that girl.
00:09:15You know Dave, maybe you should see a counselor or something.
00:09:19Go to one of those divorce recovery groups.
00:09:21Are you kidding me?
00:09:22And listen to all those sob stories? No way.
00:09:24They've got Christian groups that meet.
00:09:26I don't need any of that stuff. I'm fine.
00:09:28You might want to check it out.
00:09:30Besides, you need to move forward, not backward.
00:09:33Why? Because I told you a little bit about Mary?
00:09:35There's nothing wrong in talking about her.
00:09:37But it just wasn't in God's plan. That's why you didn't marry her.
00:09:40No, I didn't marry her because I was young and stupid.
00:09:43But you once told me that if you had not moved out of New York State,
00:09:47you probably would have never found Jesus.
00:09:49Now you know there's nothing more valuable than having God in your life.
00:09:52That's true, but why didn't He allow me to become a Christian up there?
00:09:57And why didn't He allow Mary and I to get married?
00:10:03How was school, sweetie? Did you learn anything?
00:10:06Um, nope.
00:10:08Michelle, you've been in school all year and you haven't learned a thing.
00:10:11Dad, do you want to talk to Ashley again?
00:10:15No, honey, I don't need to talk to her.
00:10:17I love you both. Love you too.
00:10:19Have a good weekend. I'll call you tomorrow night, okay?
00:10:21All right. All right. Good night. God bless.
00:10:23Good night.
00:10:47Good night.
00:11:17Jesus! Jesus!
00:11:47Hey Paul,
00:11:54did you ever think of that high school sweetheart of yours?
00:11:56Who?
00:11:57The girl you dated in high school. Did you ever think about her?
00:11:59You mean Regina?
00:12:01Yeah.
00:12:02No man, we only dated a little.
00:12:04I told you, I was a lineman.
00:12:06Besides, I have got the godliest lady the Lord ever put on this earth for a wife.
00:12:12You've really got a good marriage, don't you?
00:12:15You've got a great marriage.
00:12:17It's not because of me, it's because of her.
00:12:19I'm glad for you.
00:12:22God knows I tried in my marriage.
00:12:25I hear you.
00:12:27But it takes two.
00:12:29It takes two to get married and it only takes one to get divorced.
00:12:32I'm telling you, you need to go to one of those recovery groups.
00:12:36Talk to people who have walked through this stuff before.
00:12:38It will help you walk through it.
00:12:39You know what I really need to do?
00:12:42I really need to travel back to 1974
00:12:45and start all over again with the greatest girl that ever came my way
00:12:48and this time hang on to her.
00:12:50You've really been thinking a lot about this girl.
00:12:53Yeah I have.
00:12:55That was 30 years ago. You can't do that.
00:12:58Do what?
00:13:00You can't live in the past and you can't go back in time.
00:13:03I can in my mind and in my dreams.
00:13:06Yeah but when you wake up, you'll be back in the real world
00:13:09where you're divorced with two daughters.
00:13:11And you'll have me.
00:13:41You'll have me.
00:14:00Here's the Callaway file.
00:14:02Oh, thanks.
00:14:04You okay?
00:14:06Yeah I was just doing a little daydreaming.
00:14:08Okay.
00:14:10Did you ever go to one of those divorce recovery groups when...
00:14:13you know.
00:14:15Yeah, I went to the one that meets over at Southside Fellowship.
00:14:18Don't have to be a member of the church to go.
00:14:20Does it still meet?
00:14:22As far as I know. I can find out if you like.
00:14:24Did it help you?
00:14:26You know what, it really did.
00:14:28How?
00:14:29Um, just listening to other people who were going through the same things I was.
00:14:33It's mostly the victims that are in those classes.
00:14:35Pretty good therapy though.
00:14:37Think I should go?
00:14:38Well it wouldn't hurt you if that's what you're thinking.
00:14:40That's not what I'm thinking.
00:14:42And it would not be a waste of time if that's what you're thinking.
00:14:44Here's what I'm thinking.
00:14:46No matter how I look at this, it just doesn't add up.
00:14:49How does a woman destroy a family with two children and a devoted husband
00:14:53after 19 years of marriage?
00:14:55I mean, why does God allow something like that to happen?
00:14:57You can't blame God, Dave. She's the one that made the choice.
00:15:00But He allowed it.
00:15:02He saw this coming and He could have done something to prevent it.
00:15:04Maybe He tried.
00:15:06He didn't try hard enough.
00:15:09I don't have the answers for you.
00:15:11Does anybody?
00:15:13Well the group will help and you should go.
00:15:17I'm going to get the information for you.
00:15:19I probably won't use it but thanks.
00:15:23So, what are you going to do with that bonus check?
00:15:26I don't know. I haven't really thought about it.
00:15:28Well, I'll tell you what I'm going to do.
00:15:30I'm going to take the little lady on a cruise.
00:15:33We're going to spend some quality time together,
00:15:35praise the Lord and enjoy seven days in the Caribbean.
00:15:39Or is it Caribbean?
00:15:41It's fine either way.
00:15:43Hey, I'd love to go.
00:15:45Sorry buddy, this trip is just for two.
00:15:48When do you leave?
00:15:49Well, as soon as I can schedule a time off. Hopefully next month.
00:15:53Well, happy sailing.
00:15:56Thank you.
00:15:59You know, the Lord is really blessing us.
00:16:01And we made that big deal and God has rewarded us with a nice bonus.
00:16:05Everybody needs a little R&R.
00:16:07Even Jesus took some R&R when he was on earth.
00:16:09I wonder if he took a little cruise.
00:16:11He didn't have to take a cruise underwater.
00:16:13He just took a walk on it.
00:16:32This class is to help you cope with your situation.
00:16:51Now everybody here is either divorced or separated or going through a divorce.
00:16:56Some of you still want your marriages to come back together.
00:16:59Some of you don't know what happened.
00:17:02And all of you probably wish this had never happened
00:17:05and are wondering where God is in all of this.
00:17:08Well, I'm here to tell you that he's right in the middle of it.
00:17:12And if you let him, he'll see you through it one way or another.
00:17:17And he has a purpose for allowing you to go through this,
00:17:21even though you may not see it or understand why.
00:17:25Now we've got a couple of new people with us tonight
00:17:28and what we usually do is have you introduce yourself,
00:17:31share with us what you want.
00:17:33Everything that is said in this room stays in this room.
00:17:37Just remember that everybody here is going through the same thing that you are.
00:17:42We're just here to help each other.
00:17:45Dave?
00:17:50My name is Dave and I'm divorced, but not by my own choice.
00:17:57I have two daughters and that's about it.
00:18:04Is there anything else you'd like to share with us?
00:18:06Uh, no.
00:18:10To tell you the truth, I really don't know why I'm here.
00:18:15Well, we're here for a reason, Dave.
00:18:17The Lord guided you here tonight.
00:18:19I guess.
00:18:21Well, we're just here to help you if we can.
00:18:25You can turn back the clock.
00:18:27You mean like turn back time and start all over again?
00:18:30Yeah, you got it.
00:18:32Well, a time machine I haven't perfected yet, Dave.
00:18:35But we're glad you came.
00:18:37You want to tell us who you are?
00:18:40My name is Amanda.
00:18:43I'm separated.
00:18:45My husband was unfaithful and left with another woman.
00:18:49We have two kids, a boy and a girl.
00:18:52And they're 11 and 8 years old.
00:18:55And this is the first time I've done anything like this.
00:19:04Good morning, Sue.
00:19:05Good morning, Dave.
00:19:07Well, I went to that meeting last night.
00:19:09And?
00:19:10It was just what I thought it was going to be.
00:19:12Which was?
00:19:13A bunch of people sitting around for an hour sharing one heartache after another.
00:19:16The leader makes his introduction speech saying God has a purpose in this situation.
00:19:21Tell me, what purpose could God possibly have in allowing divorce?
00:19:24God hates divorce.
00:19:25I got news for him.
00:19:26In case he hasn't noticed lately, there's an epidemic of it going on in this country.
00:19:29And more so in the church.
00:19:31You know, I read there are more divorces among so-called Christians than there are in the secular world.
00:19:35And why is that?
00:19:37Nobody knows.
00:19:38Nobody's doing anything about it either.
00:19:40Sounds like you're mad at God.
00:19:42Why not? He's the one running this show, isn't he?
00:19:44Look, I know how painful this is, Dave. Remember me a few years ago?
00:19:48It just doesn't make any sense.
00:19:50I know, but trust me, the group will help. It's a place for you to vent.
00:19:54Vent? I'm borderline wanting to rip somebody's head off and we both know her name.
00:19:58I'm so sorry you're going through this. I really am.
00:20:02Yeah, I know. Thanks.
00:20:05But you're going to get through this, Dave. It might not seem like it now, but you will.
00:20:20Thank you.
00:20:51I heard another Dave & Mary song today.
00:20:53Huh?
00:20:54From the oldie station on the way in. Played a lot of songs from the 70's.
00:20:58I thought you listened to The Word when you drove in to work.
00:21:01I do, usually. Just been catching a few tunes.
00:21:04Must have been some girl.
00:21:06She was, man. I told you she was the greatest.
00:21:12I've been thinking about going to see her.
00:21:14What?
00:21:15I've been thinking about going to see her.
00:21:17What?
00:21:19I've been thinking about going to see her.
00:21:21No way, man. You don't need to be doing anything like that. Isn't she married?
00:21:25Her name's Simmons now. Mary Simmons.
00:21:28I think she was married last time I knew.
00:21:30She's got a couple of daughters. They must be college age by now.
00:21:33Then you definitely need to stay away from her if she's married and has a family.
00:21:36I just want to say hi.
00:21:38Dave, no. That would be wrong.
00:21:40This ain't the Lord telling you to do this.
00:21:42Who is it then? The devil?
00:21:44Sounds like you are telling you to do this.
00:21:46Come on, man. I thought you were my friend.
00:21:48I am your friend. I'm your best friend.
00:21:50And that's why I'm telling you, you don't need to be going to see your old girlfriend
00:21:53who's married with her own family.
00:21:55Nothing good can come of that. Only trouble.
00:21:59Nothing bad is going to happen.
00:22:02No, man. You wouldn't want your wife's old boyfriend coming around
00:22:05if the roles were reversed, would you?
00:22:09I don't know.
00:22:10Dave, come on. Be serious. Would you?
00:22:16Hello.
00:22:26Hello.
00:22:27May I speak with Dave please?
00:22:29Speaking.
00:22:30Dave, my name's Carla. I was at the divorce meeting last week.
00:22:34We didn't meet or anything but I noticed you weren't there tonight.
00:22:37Well I don't think I'm coming back. I just wanted to check it out.
00:22:41I was wondering if we could talk for a minute. Do you have a moment?
00:22:44Yes.
00:22:46I know you might think this is kind of strange but I feel like I'm supposed to talk to you.
00:22:51I wanted to talk to you last week but I didn't get up the nerve
00:22:54and then I didn't see you there tonight.
00:22:56Well like I said, I don't think I'm coming back.
00:22:58Just out of curiosity, how did you get my number?
00:23:01I got it from the registration sheet.
00:23:03Look, I don't mean to bother you or anything.
00:23:05I just thought maybe you could use a friend.
00:23:08I'm fine, really. Thank you.
00:23:12Well then, I thought maybe I could use a friend.
00:23:15Do you think we could just get together and talk?
00:23:23I was born and raised near Cleveland but moved here after I got married.
00:23:26My husband was transferred with his job.
00:23:29I met him about twelve years ago, just after college.
00:23:33We only dated for eight months.
00:23:35He left after our ninth anniversary.
00:23:38The divorce was final a year later.
00:23:40We had no children.
00:23:42Was he a Christian?
00:23:43He said he was.
00:23:45Was there a reason for him to leave?
00:23:47No, not at all.
00:23:49Why did he leave then?
00:23:51Looking back, I realized that our relationship was based mostly on physical attraction.
00:23:55We didn't have a strong spiritual base and quickly grew apart over the years.
00:24:00We both knew that our marriage was a mistake.
00:24:03But I was committed to it. I didn't want it to end.
00:24:07We started arguing a lot and then one day he decided to leave.
00:24:12You know, I think he got tired of trying.
00:24:15Or at least tired of me.
00:24:18Do you think he was seeing another woman?
00:24:21I don't think so, but I don't know.
00:24:25People get divorced today like it's nothing.
00:24:28Almost think God's blind or something.
00:24:31Is it still hard for you?
00:24:33No, not anymore.
00:24:34I wasn't devastated by it. I had married the wrong person and I knew it.
00:24:38But I tried to stick with it. He didn't.
00:24:40Why do you go to the group then?
00:24:42Listen to other people's stories?
00:24:45Why I go to the group has very little to do with my ex-husband.
00:24:48I go for something to do, for fellowship.
00:24:51It gets lonely sometimes.
00:24:54It's really weird what your mind starts to do when you're alone again.
00:24:58How do you mean?
00:25:01I hope you don't think this is silly.
00:25:04For a while I was thinking a lot about this guy I dated in high school.
00:25:09Pretty stupid, huh?
00:25:11In high school?
00:25:13Yeah. His name was Brian.
00:25:16He was a great guy. We got along really well.
00:25:20We dated for almost two years.
00:25:23I must have been pretty lonely to be thinking about him, don't you think?
00:25:26I don't know.
00:25:29What happened to the happy couple?
00:25:31After we'd been dating for about a year and a half, I just didn't feel the same way about him.
00:25:35I can't really explain it.
00:25:37I tried to keep it going, but I knew that it was going to end.
00:25:40So I broke up with him the summer after we graduated.
00:25:43I hurt him really badly.
00:25:46He's been married now for 13 years.
00:25:50And I'm divorced.
00:25:52I'm sorry.
00:25:54Me too.
00:25:56He was my first love.
00:25:59You know what they say about first loves.
00:26:03So when was the last time you saw him?
00:26:07About seven or eight years.
00:26:11Seven and a half at least.
00:26:17So why did you go to the group?
00:26:22My wife left me about a year and a half ago.
00:26:25But we've been officially divorced for five months.
00:26:28I have two daughters, 15 and 17.
00:26:31Joint custody. She gets them one week, I get them the other.
00:26:34Monday to Monday, one phone call a night.
00:26:36So what happened?
00:26:38She said she didn't have feelings for me.
00:26:41She didn't love me anymore.
00:26:43That's not the real reason, unless there's someone she gave me.
00:26:46Oh?
00:26:49She started seeing another man before we were separated.
00:26:53How do you know?
00:26:56I know.
00:26:58Are you sure?
00:27:00Yes, I'm sure.
00:27:04Is she a Christian?
00:27:07Said she was.
00:27:10Biblical reason to leave?
00:27:13Not at all.
00:27:15Sounds familiar.
00:27:17Yeah.
00:27:20Anyway, the last thing I ever wanted
00:27:23was to be divorced and have my family split up.
00:27:26I've remained faithful to her even till now.
00:27:29Are you still hoping she'll come back?
00:27:31I don't know what I'm hoping for anymore.
00:27:34I mean, the girls and I prayed about it, and they want it.
00:27:38And she's dated quite a few men since she left.
00:27:42It's a nightmare any way you look at it.
00:27:45So your daughter's taking all of this?
00:27:47They're going along with it. I mean, what else can they do?
00:27:50They go back and forth from house to house. It's awful.
00:27:53But it's what she wants. At least she's happy.
00:27:57She's not happy, Dave. She just thinks that she is.
00:28:01One day she is going to wake up and realize what she's done.
00:28:04Yeah, I'd like to see that, but I doubt it.
00:28:08No, she's doing what she does best, hurt people.
00:28:12When trouble be contentious, bring chaos.
00:28:14That is my beautiful ex-bride.
00:28:18I'm sorry I shouldn't be saying any of this.
00:28:20No, it's okay.
00:28:22I've got nobody to blame but myself.
00:28:25I didn't marry the right person either.
00:28:28I was totally faithful to her and committed to my family,
00:28:31and I just made a wrong choice.
00:28:36You know when you said you dated for eight months?
00:28:39I got you beat. Seven and a half.
00:28:43And we got married for the physical attraction, too,
00:28:46so I can totally relate.
00:28:48Join the club, huh?
00:28:51Join the club.
00:28:55Anyway, lately it's not my ex that I've been thinking about.
00:29:00You know on the phone when you said you felt like you were supposed to talk to me?
00:29:04Well, let's just say I'm normally pretty skeptical about things like that.
00:29:07But I think maybe this time I was wrong.
00:29:10See, I've been thinking about this girl that I dated in high school.
00:29:14Her name was Mary.
00:29:16And she was my first love, too.
00:29:19How long were you together?
00:29:21Two years, four months, 28 days.
00:29:25You mean you know exactly?
00:29:28Yes.
00:29:30She was a great girl.
00:29:33We'd been dating for about nine months when I went off to college.
00:29:35She was in her last year of high school.
00:29:37I used to come home every weekend to see her.
00:29:39We'd write two or three letters a week.
00:29:43And then in the spring of 75, I woke up at college one day and...
00:29:48something had changed.
00:29:51I don't know how or why, but I...
00:29:55I just wasn't as excited to see her as I used to be.
00:30:01Now we continued to date until June of 76.
00:30:05Then I broke it off with her.
00:30:08We didn't fight or anything.
00:30:11I just lost it for her.
00:30:16And I don't know why.
00:30:31Good morning, Susie Q.
00:30:33You're in a good mood.
00:30:35What's her name?
00:30:37Actually, my dear friend, I did meet someone.
00:30:46So, does this woman have a name?
00:30:49Her name is Carla.
00:30:51It's nice to know that I'm not alone in what I'm thinking and feeling.
00:30:54Carla, nice name.
00:30:56It's not what you think.
00:30:58She's much younger than I am.
00:31:00So, where'd you meet her?
00:31:02At the divorce recovery group.
00:31:04Uh-huh. I thought you weren't going to go back there.
00:31:06I didn't.
00:31:07Then I don't get it.
00:31:09She called me.
00:31:10And now you can't stop thinking about her.
00:31:12Actually, it's not Carla that I've been thinking about.
00:31:15Your ex?
00:31:16Nope.
00:31:17Not your ex.
00:31:19Okay, I have no idea what you're talking about.
00:31:21Her name is Mary.
00:31:22Mary? Who's Mary?
00:31:24Mary is a girl that I dated for about two and a half years,
00:31:28who I haven't seen in almost 25 years,
00:31:30who's probably very happily married while I'm very miserably divorced,
00:31:34and who, if I had married, I wouldn't be in this nightmare today.
00:31:37How's that for an explanation?
00:31:39And all of this came to light because you met a woman named Carla?
00:31:42Not all of it, but some of it.
00:31:44Why have you never mentioned Mary to me?
00:31:46Well, when you're married, you don't usually talk about your old girlfriends.
00:31:49I guess not.
00:31:50So, what about Carla then?
00:31:53Carla is a new friend who is going through the same thing that I'm going through.
00:31:57So maybe that meeting wasn't a waste of time after all.
00:32:06Hey girl.
00:32:07Oh, what a morning. Phone has been ringing off the hook.
00:32:10How are you doing?
00:32:11I'm fine.
00:32:12How was the meeting?
00:32:13It was good.
00:32:14Did you meet someone?
00:32:16You know, every time I go to that meeting, you always ask me that.
00:32:18I do not.
00:32:20Yes you do.
00:32:21Really? I hadn't noticed.
00:32:23Have my samples come in?
00:32:25They're on the table.
00:32:26Thank you very much.
00:32:30Well, did you?
00:32:31What?
00:32:32Meet someone.
00:32:34Oh, I kind of like this one.
00:32:35Carla.
00:32:36What do you think?
00:32:37I think you're avoiding the question, yes or no.
00:32:40Sort of.
00:32:42How do you sort of meet someone?
00:32:45It's hard to explain.
00:32:47Try me.
00:32:49It was nothing.
00:32:50Does this one have potential?
00:32:51Oh, don't be silly.
00:32:52Carla, I am your best friend.
00:32:54Nikki, I just spoke with a man, that's all.
00:32:56He's just a friend and besides, he's much older than I am.
00:32:59Love comes in many packages.
00:33:01Okay, I've got to go meet a client.
00:33:05What's his name?
00:33:06Bye.
00:33:07His name?
00:33:09Bye.
00:33:10Carla.
00:33:12Brian.
00:33:20Bye.
00:33:21Bye.
00:33:22Bye.
00:33:23Bye.
00:33:24Bye.
00:33:25Bye.
00:33:26Bye.
00:33:27Bye.
00:33:28Bye.
00:33:29Bye.
00:33:30Bye.
00:33:31Bye.
00:33:32Bye.
00:33:33Bye.
00:33:34Bye.
00:33:35Bye.
00:33:36Bye.
00:33:37Bye.
00:33:38Bye.
00:33:39Bye.
00:33:40Bye.
00:33:41Bye.
00:33:42Bye.
00:33:43Bye.
00:33:44Bye.
00:33:45Bye.
00:33:46Bye.
00:33:47Bye.
00:33:48Bye.
00:33:49Bye.
00:33:50Bye.
00:33:51Bye.
00:33:52Bye.
00:33:53Bye.
00:33:54Bye.
00:33:55Bye.
00:33:56Bye.
00:33:57Bye.
00:33:58Bye.
00:33:59Bye.
00:34:00Bye.
00:34:01Bye.
00:34:02Bye.
00:34:06I want to go see her.
00:34:07Go see Mary?
00:34:08Uh-huh.
00:34:09I want to get in a plane, fly to New York and see her.
00:34:12Does that sound crazy?
00:34:14I just want to talk to her for a while, just me and her alone.
00:34:17Can you relate?
00:34:18Yeah, but I can't. I mean, he's married now and I'm not going to do anything to hurt that.
00:34:23Besides, my troubles aren't his problem.
00:34:26So you've had no contact with him other than that time eight years ago?
00:34:30And that was by accident. I mean, we just sort of ran into each other.
00:34:33But don't you ever want to see him or talk to him?
00:34:35Yes, but I can't. He's married and that settles it. I had my chance with him.
00:34:41What's that old saying, you're the master of your decisions but the slave of your choices?
00:34:47I don't want to have a guilt complex about seeing Mary.
00:34:50I don't want to break up her marriage or anything.
00:34:52Then what do you want?
00:34:56I don't know.
00:34:59I think I want to apologize to her.
00:35:02I want her to know how sorry I am for breaking up with her.
00:35:06I want to tell her what a great person I thought she was.
00:35:09I want her to know that.
00:35:11When I saw Brian, it wasn't the same.
00:35:14Too many things had happened from the time that we dated to when I saw him again.
00:35:19I was remembering the guy that I dated.
00:35:22Not the man he is now.
00:35:24I understand.
00:35:26It's just that I had such a deep love for Mary.
00:35:29That first year we were together, it was the most fantastic feeling in my life.
00:35:33It was like I couldn't be with her enough and she felt the same.
00:35:37But that girl doesn't exist anymore.
00:35:39She's only in your memory.
00:35:42I know.
00:35:43I just want to see her.
00:35:44I want to talk to her.
00:35:46She was such a beautiful girl.
00:35:50What if she looks completely different now?
00:35:53She probably does.
00:35:56I still want to see her.
00:35:59You really loved her, didn't you?
00:36:02Yeah.
00:36:03I did.
00:36:06Those were the greatest days of my life.
00:36:12So, do you think he likes you?
00:36:14Would you stop? It's not like that.
00:36:16You have a one-track mind.
00:36:17Can I help it that I want you to be as happy as I am?
00:36:19It's like I told you before. I am not seeking anybody out.
00:36:22At least I'm not trying to.
00:36:24Okay, so what are you trying to do then?
00:36:26I am trying to wait on the Lord.
00:36:28Well, I can't argue with that.
00:36:30So why did he call you?
00:36:32We have something very much in common.
00:36:34Oh yeah? What's that?
00:36:36My Brian is his Mary.
00:36:38His first love?
00:36:40His first love?
00:36:42The hardest part for me has been getting over the hurt.
00:36:46I don't think you ever get over the hurt.
00:36:48Speaking from a man's perspective,
00:36:50I think the only thing that really helps you get over the hurt is another love interest.
00:36:54Someone else to love and someone who loves you.
00:36:57The Lord can heal your hurt.
00:36:59But in my case he hasn't.
00:37:01I'm still hurting very much.
00:37:04All I know is that I was totally devastated by my situation.
00:37:08And the only thing that's been helping
00:37:10is the fact that I've been thinking about another woman.
00:37:12It's helping ease the pain.
00:37:14I agree.
00:37:16I think meeting someone else or even thinking about someone else really does help.
00:37:20Let's face it.
00:37:22Divorce is total destruction of the heart.
00:37:24It's like a grenade goes off inside
00:37:26and shatters you into a million little pieces.
00:37:28Now I know the Lord can put them back together again.
00:37:31But how does he do it?
00:37:33I think maybe he brings in another love.
00:37:36Someone even greater than what you thought you had before.
00:37:40Only another person can really heal the hurt.
00:37:43That's how I see it.
00:37:46I love you.
00:38:04So? You spoke up a bit tonight.
00:38:06Getting into this a little?
00:38:08I don't know why I say anything at all.
00:38:10I'm the one who needs the answers.
00:38:12You know, in the few times I've talked with you,
00:38:14I've never even asked you what you do.
00:38:16I'm sorry.
00:38:18It shows you how consumed I am with myself.
00:38:20Oh, that's all right.
00:38:22I'm an interior decorator.
00:38:24I own my own business.
00:38:26No kidding?
00:38:28Yeah, I've been doing it for several years.
00:38:30You still like it?
00:38:32I do.
00:38:34You do okay with it?
00:38:36I do okay.
00:38:38How do you get business?
00:38:41It keeps me going.
00:38:43Sounds good.
00:38:45I'm glad for you.
00:38:49So I guess I'll just see you next week.
00:38:51Hey, listen.
00:38:53The girls are with their mother tonight.
00:38:55Do you want to get a cup of coffee or something?
00:38:57What did you guys talk about?
00:38:59Different things, but mostly about Mary.
00:39:01Okay, this guy is starting to sound obsessed.
00:39:03I can tell she was really special to him.
00:39:05She was an artist.
00:39:07She used to make him things.
00:39:09Things like anniversary cards.
00:39:11What do you mean anniversary cards?
00:39:13You know, we've been together six months,
00:39:15nine months, that sort of thing.
00:39:17She used to make him something different every month.
00:39:19One time she took a glass bottle
00:39:21and put little memories and pictures
00:39:23of their relationship inside of it.
00:39:25Oh, very romantic.
00:39:27All right, so if this girl was so special,
00:39:29why did he break up with her?
00:39:31I asked him about that last night.
00:39:33There were two things that hurt our relationship,
00:39:35and they were both my fault.
00:39:38One, I was jealous.
00:39:40I didn't want to be, but I was.
00:39:42And she never gave me a reason to be jealous.
00:39:44I was just possessive.
00:39:46I was even jealous of guys she dated
00:39:48before I came along.
00:39:50A lot of teenage boys are like that.
00:39:52I was pretty bad.
00:39:54Anyway, that hurt our relationship.
00:39:56What was the second thing?
00:40:00After I'd gone to college for a while,
00:40:02I thought I wanted to date other girls.
00:40:04I don't know why.
00:40:06I already had the perfect one for me.
00:40:08Dave, almost everyone has a first love
00:40:10that they don't marry.
00:40:12I really blew it.
00:40:14If I could,
00:40:16I would go back
00:40:18and start all over.
00:40:20And this time I wouldn't let her go.
00:40:22But you didn't have Grace back then.
00:40:24And I don't have her now.
00:40:28Now I'm starting to feel sorry for this guy.
00:40:30Have you seen a picture of her?
00:40:32No.
00:40:35In New York State, about 20 miles from where they grew up.
00:40:37So he left and she stayed.
00:40:39Yeah.
00:40:41Carly, you are an attractive woman.
00:40:43Do you think he's interested in you?
00:40:45I don't know.
00:40:47Are you interested in him?
00:40:49I don't know that either.
00:40:51All I do know is that I've walked the road
00:40:53that he's on right now.
00:40:55I've gone through all of the emotions
00:40:57of wanting my first love again.
00:40:59You never sounded as bad off as this guy.
00:41:01Well, maybe my relationship with Brian
00:41:03We're talking about a girl he dated 30 years ago.
00:41:05She must have been really something.
00:41:07Yeah, she must have been.
00:41:11Do we need potatoes?
00:41:13I think so.
00:41:15Yes, we do.
00:41:17Russet or red?
00:41:19Take your pick.
00:41:21Oh, hey, there's Mom.
00:41:33♪
00:42:03♪
00:42:33♪
00:42:45You should have called him.
00:42:47He had his girls all weekend.
00:42:49He was probably busy.
00:42:51Still should have called.
00:42:53Maybe I should stop meeting him.
00:42:55Incredible.
00:42:57She meets a guy she likes and he doesn't even know she's there.
00:42:59I don't like anybody.
00:43:02I think you do.
00:43:04Well, you think wrong.
00:43:06He's just a friend, someone to talk to.
00:43:08I don't know why I'd tell you anything.
00:43:10I mean, I even talked to a guy
00:43:12and you've got me walking down the aisle with him.
00:43:14Oh, me?
00:43:16Besides, he's 13 years older than I am
00:43:18and if we were to be married
00:43:20when he was 95, I'd only be 82.
00:43:22Oh, we wouldn't want that, now would we?
00:43:32Hey, Dave.
00:43:34Come here, I want to show you something.
00:43:38Check it out.
00:43:46Well, look at this.
00:43:48Seven-day cruise,
00:43:50five ports a call.
00:43:52In here, I thought you were all talk.
00:43:54No way, man.
00:43:56This is the second honeymoon that is long overdue.
00:43:58I went online this morning to check the weather.
00:44:0080 degrees here, 86 degrees there.
00:44:02I love hot weather.
00:44:04I'm glad for you. When do you leave?
00:44:06In four weeks and I am looking forward to it.
00:44:08You just try and keep things in order while I'm gone.
00:44:10I don't want to come back to an office
00:44:12that needs patching up.
00:44:14Well, we'll do our best.
00:44:18Are you alright, Dave?
00:44:20You know I wasn't trying to hurt you
00:44:22showing you these tickets.
00:44:24I apologize if I was insensitive.
00:44:26You were fine, Paul.
00:44:29I'm glad for you. Really, I am.
00:44:31Thanks anyway.
00:44:59I love you.
00:45:01I love you.
00:45:03I love you.
00:45:05I love you.
00:45:07I love you.
00:45:09I love you.
00:45:11I love you.
00:45:13I love you.
00:45:15I love you.
00:45:17I love you.
00:45:19I love you.
00:45:21I love you.
00:45:23I love you.
00:45:25I love you.
00:45:27I love you.
00:45:29I love you.
00:45:31I love you.
00:45:33I love you.
00:45:35I love you.
00:45:37I love you.
00:45:39I love you.
00:45:41I love you.
00:45:43I love you.
00:45:45I love you.
00:45:47I love you.
00:45:49I love you.
00:45:51I love you.
00:45:53I love you.
00:45:56I love you.
00:45:58I love you.
00:46:00I love you.
00:46:02I love you.
00:46:04I love you.
00:46:06I love you.
00:46:08I love you.
00:46:10I love you.
00:46:12I love you.
00:46:14I love you.
00:46:16I love you.
00:46:18I love you.
00:46:20I love you.
00:46:22I love you.
00:46:24Hiii.
00:46:26Hi.
00:46:28How you doin'
00:46:30I'm okay, how are you doin'?
00:46:32Doing good, I'm doing good.
00:46:34You don't mind if I sit over on this side of the room tonight, do you?
00:46:36No, not at all.
00:46:38Ha.
00:46:40I uh,
00:46:42I made a reservation today.
00:46:46So how do you make sense of your life?
00:46:50My husband is seeing someone
00:46:52My husband's seeing someone else and that kills me.
00:46:56Even if he decided to come back, how do I...
00:47:02People say you need to forgive.
00:47:04Okay, I can do that.
00:47:06But how do you forget?
00:47:08When I look ahead, I don't see daylight.
00:47:12I feel like I'm walking in total darkness.
00:47:18I know exactly how she feels.
00:47:22Can you offer her any advice?
00:47:25You're the man with all the answers, not me.
00:47:27Well, I'm not sure there are any answers
00:47:32when you're going through something like this.
00:47:34Nothing really makes sense.
00:47:37The hardest part's just accepting what's happened.
00:47:40And if you can do that, then you're on the road to healing.
00:47:44But most people have a hard time doing that.
00:47:47And so they deal with their hurt in different ways.
00:47:51And all of these are understandable.
00:47:53You know, some people tell themselves that they're okay.
00:47:57That they can handle this.
00:47:59That they're just going to be strong and move on.
00:48:03But it's really only a front.
00:48:05And usually in time, they break down.
00:48:09Some people get very bitter, angry.
00:48:13And they stay that way for quite some time.
00:48:16Makes you feel better.
00:48:18But the Bible says that bitterness troubles us.
00:48:25And so that's really not a road you want to travel.
00:48:29And others tend to look backwards.
00:48:34Since it's only a nightmare when you look ahead,
00:48:37you try to return to a more pleasant time in your life.
00:48:42Or relive an old relationship.
00:48:46But the key element is to accept the things that did happen.
00:48:52And accept the things that didn't.
00:48:57I know it's not easy.
00:48:59And you can't do this on your own.
00:49:03In your time of deepest pain, you really
00:49:05need to turn to the Lord.
00:49:08Jesus Christ is the only one who can see you through this.
00:49:17I have concluded that separation and divorce are no fun.
00:49:21Agreed.
00:49:23We agree about a lot of things.
00:49:25Yeah, we do, don't we?
00:49:28So are you going home?
00:49:31Do you want to get something to eat?
00:49:34I'd like to.
00:49:35But I'm not sure I'm in the mood for it right now.
00:49:38Well, I'm sure you're in the mood for it.
00:49:40I'm not sure I'm in the mood for it.
00:49:42I'm not sure I'm in the mood for it.
00:49:44I'd like to, but I've got the girls tonight.
00:49:47So I should probably get home.
00:49:48Of course, yeah.
00:49:51So I guess I'll just, um...
00:49:54I'll see you later then.
00:49:56Okay.
00:49:58Have a good night.
00:49:59You too.
00:50:09He's actually going to go see her.
00:50:11He made a reservation.
00:50:12Is he going to call her first?
00:50:14I don't know. I didn't ask.
00:50:16You don't think he's just going to show up on her doorstep, do you?
00:50:19I don't know.
00:50:20So he wants to go see his old girlfriend
00:50:24who is married, and he wants to see her alone.
00:50:27How's he going to think he's going to pull that off?
00:50:35My wife is already packed.
00:50:36We don't leave for three weeks and she's ready to go.
00:50:39No kidding.
00:50:40I should have done this a long time ago.
00:50:42A long time ago you didn't have that big fat bonus check.
00:50:45You got any plans?
00:50:47Your bonus check, have you decided what you're going to do with it?
00:50:50Not with all of it.
00:50:52...
00:50:59You're still going to that divorce recovery group, right?
00:51:02Yeah.
00:51:04Is it helping?
00:51:06Not really.
00:51:07I don't like talking to Carla.
00:51:09That's why I keep going.
00:51:11I guess it's helping then.
00:51:13Yeah, I guess.
00:51:15So when do I get to meet this lady?
00:51:18We're just friends.
00:51:21We're a couple of people going through the same thing
00:51:23at the same time, that's all.
00:51:25I understand.
00:51:41Yes?
00:51:45You have a visitor.
00:51:47I'm not expecting anyone. Did I miss a meeting?
00:51:49She says her name is Carla.
00:51:53Hey. Hi.
00:51:55How are you? I'm good.
00:51:57Have you two met? Yes, we introduced ourselves.
00:51:59Gwyneth.
00:52:01Hello.
00:52:10Am I interrupting anything?
00:52:12No, not at all.
00:52:14I just got a call this morning from a potential client across the street
00:52:16and finished up there and thought I'd stop by and say hello.
00:52:18Well, hello. Please sit.
00:52:20Hey, did you get the job?
00:52:22Yes, I did. They are completely renovating their lobby area and meeting rooms.
00:52:26Wow. You must be quite the irresistible saleswoman.
00:52:30I pray a lot when I get a new client and remind the Lord I've got bills to pay.
00:52:34Hey, when you're done over there, do you think you can come and spice this place up?
00:52:38I think it looks pretty good in here.
00:52:40It's been like this for years.
00:52:42It still looks good.
00:52:44Excuse me.
00:52:46Yes?
00:52:48Which Thursday?
00:52:50No, I can't. I'm going to be out of town.
00:52:53Right, so we're going to have to do it the following week.
00:52:56Pick any day but make sure you're not by Paul.
00:52:59You don't want to interfere with the second honeymoon here.
00:53:01Right. Okay. I'm sorry.
00:53:05Is your trip to New York next Thursday?
00:53:09Yes, it is.
00:53:11I didn't realize it was coming so soon.
00:53:13I'm feeling really nervous about this.
00:53:15It's like the first time I met her I was nervous then.
00:53:18I'm sure she was too.
00:53:20Yeah, but that's because she knew I was coming to meet her.
00:53:22This time she doesn't know I'm coming at all.
00:53:24Well then she won't have time to get nervous.
00:53:26You know, I wonder how she's going to respond to this.
00:53:28Well, if she loved you the way you said she did
00:53:31then all the memories will be there.
00:53:33I think when you date someone for that length of time
00:53:36you give them a piece of your heart
00:53:38and I don't think you ever get it back.
00:53:40We can both relate to that, can't we?
00:53:43Yes. Yes we can.
00:53:48Girls, I'm going to be taking a short trip
00:53:52at the end of this week so you'll be staying at your mother's.
00:53:55I will be gone early Thursday to late Friday
00:53:57so you'll be staying at your mother's Wednesday and Thursday
00:53:59and then we'll get back on schedule, okay?
00:54:01Where are you going?
00:54:02New York.
00:54:03Oh, you're going to visit Grandma and Grandpa?
00:54:05No, actually I'm going to be seeing an old friend.
00:54:08Like an old buddy from high school?
00:54:10You could say that, sort of.
00:54:14Oh, can I go with you?
00:54:16Well, you'd have to miss the first week of school.
00:54:19Yeah?
00:54:20How about no?
00:54:22Nice try, though.
00:54:25Thanks a lot.
00:54:26You're welcome.
00:54:27♪♪♪
00:54:37♪♪♪
00:54:47♪♪♪
00:54:53I got your email about you taking a couple days off.
00:54:56You okay?
00:54:57Yeah, everything's fine.
00:54:59You sure?
00:55:00I'm going to be taking a little trip.
00:55:02I thought I should let you know ahead of time
00:55:04so I don't have to play 20 questions when I come back.
00:55:06I don't understand.
00:55:08I'm going up north.
00:55:09Up north?
00:55:11Going to New York.
00:55:15The high school girl?
00:55:16What can I say?
00:55:18Does she know you're coming?
00:55:20No, she doesn't.
00:55:22When are you leaving?
00:55:24I'm leaving Thursday.
00:55:25Coming back late Friday.
00:55:27By the way, keep the place running while I'm gone.
00:55:29I don't want to have to patch things up when I come back.
00:55:31Dave, God doesn't want you to go out and mess up somebody's marriage.
00:55:34I can't support you on this.
00:55:35I'm just going to say hello to an old friend.
00:55:38Like I said before, if the roles were reversed,
00:55:41you wouldn't want this happening to you.
00:55:42It's already happened to me so don't lay a guilt trip on me.
00:55:45I'm not trying to lay a guilt trip on you.
00:55:47Then why do I feel guilty every time I talk to you about Mary?
00:55:49Dave, come on man.
00:55:50If I were doing this, you'd be all over me.
00:55:51I don't think so.
00:55:52Just because your wife did you wrong doesn't mean you should do the same.
00:55:55I'm not doing anything wrong.
00:55:57I'm not going out there to commit adultery
00:55:59and I'm not trying to ruin anybody's marriage.
00:56:01I'm just going up to talk to someone who at one time
00:56:03was the most special person on the face of the planet to me.
00:56:06I don't see why I have to ignore her and pretend she doesn't exist for the rest of my life.
00:56:09You follow what I'm saying?
00:56:10I follow but you've lost your focus on Christ.
00:56:12I just want to see her one time.
00:56:14And what are you hoping for?
00:56:16That she's the same girl you left 30 years ago and that you'll fall in love again?
00:56:19And if that happens Dave, where does that leave her family?
00:56:22Come on man, get back in line with Jesus.
00:56:24Get back on course.
00:56:25I'll see you when I get back.
00:56:26Dave ...
00:56:27I said I'll see you when I get back.
00:56:35You always refer to that girl as Mary.
00:56:38But she is not your Mary anymore.
00:56:41She's another man's wife.
00:56:43You need to accept that.
00:56:45She'll always be Mary to me.
00:56:49She'll always be Mary to me.
00:57:03Do you ever get mad at God?
00:57:05I think we all get mad at God at one point or another in life.
00:57:09Sometimes it doesn't even seem like he's up there.
00:57:12No, it seems that way.
00:57:15What do you do when you get mad at God?
00:57:19Why do people get mad at God?
00:57:22I can think of a few reasons.
00:57:24There's only two reasons I can think of.
00:57:27We get mad at God because we don't get our way.
00:57:31When my wife left, the girls and I prayed every day,
00:57:35every day that God would put our family back together.
00:57:38We're praying for his will here.
00:57:40A good thing, right?
00:57:42He did nothing.
00:57:43Absolutely nothing.
00:57:44He just let it happen.
00:57:46But remember what the Bible says,
00:57:48thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven?
00:57:51Sometimes God's will isn't done here on Earth, Dave,
00:57:53even if it is a righteous thing.
00:57:55What's the second reason?
00:57:57We get mad at God because we know he can do something
00:58:00about a certain situation and he doesn't.
00:58:03That's probably the real issue here, isn't it?
00:58:06That's it exactly.
00:58:07He just lets it happen.
00:58:09What kind of a God are we serving here?
00:58:12Sometimes it is difficult to understand why God allows
00:58:15or doesn't allow certain things to happen.
00:58:17I wrestled with that myself years ago.
00:58:20But then I discovered a verse in Proverbs
00:58:22that really helped me through it.
00:58:24Proverbs 21-30.
00:58:27There is no counsel against the Lord.
00:58:31If the Lord Jesus Christ were to appear to you right now
00:58:34and he would answer any question you had
00:58:36about your situation, the whys, the why nots,
00:58:39when he was finished, you'd say,
00:58:41Thank you.
00:58:42Thank you, Lord.
00:58:43You're right.
00:58:44There wouldn't be any correction or anything you could say
00:58:46to him when he was finished.
00:58:48Because there is no counsel against the Lord.
00:58:51God is perfect.
00:58:52He doesn't make mistakes.
00:58:54This is supposed to make me feel better?
00:58:57It will if you'll give it time to settle in.
00:59:01You know, I believe God always has our best interest at heart.
00:59:04He's trying to form Jesus Christ in us.
00:59:08And that ain't easy.
00:59:10And it's during these trials that he does his greatest work.
00:59:15Remember, Dave, nothing grows at 12,000 feet.
00:59:19But things sure do grow in the valley.
00:59:22And it's during these valley times of life
00:59:24that he's doing something big in us.
00:59:30I just can't see anything good coming out of this.
00:59:33I just can't.
00:59:35I understand.
00:59:36But you know, I've also noticed that God doesn't always
00:59:39let us in on what he's doing at the time.
00:59:42He wants us to walk by faith.
00:59:44The Bible says, faith is what pleases God.
00:59:47You know, when this is all over,
00:59:49and you've had time to look back,
00:59:52you're going to see a great work that he's done in your life.
01:00:0030 years ago, I had a dream.
01:00:0430 years ago, I dated a girl who was absolutely perfect for me.
01:00:12And I wonder why we didn't get married.
01:00:16You know, Dave, sometimes you just gotta trust what God allows.
01:00:21I don't know how.
01:00:23I don't know how.
01:00:33Hey Paul.
01:00:36Listen, I'm sorry about this morning.
01:00:39I know you're just trying to help.
01:00:41And I hear what you're saying, you're not wrong.
01:00:43I'm just still bothered by the whole thing.
01:00:46Sure you are.
01:00:49I'm very sorry I got upset with you.
01:00:52I'm sorry I'm not forgiven.
01:00:54And I don't mean to be pushy with you.
01:00:59No, you're not.
01:01:01I love you, man.
01:01:03Love you too, brother.
01:01:05Hey Dave, if she's not a Christian
01:01:11and doesn't know about Jesus,
01:01:14maybe you can tell her.
01:01:22I love you.
01:01:52I know I should have called but I just wanted to stop by for a minute.
01:01:55Is that okay?
01:01:56Sure, come on in.
01:01:58Thanks.
01:02:03How are you?
01:02:04I'm good, how are you?
01:02:05I'm okay.
01:02:06You should have a seat right in there.
01:02:08You have a nice home.
01:02:10Thank you.
01:02:11Do you realize that what I just did to you
01:02:13is what you'll be doing when you knock on Mary's door?
01:02:15Now that you mention it, I guess you're right.
01:02:18Are you surprised to see me?
01:02:21She'll be surprised to see you too.
01:02:24Did I catch you off guard?
01:02:26A little.
01:02:27You'll be catching her off guard a lot
01:02:29so don't be worried if she keeps her distance.
01:02:31I don't know what I'm expecting.
01:02:33All I know is I get there at 11.55
01:02:35and she lives 30 minutes from the airport.
01:02:37Have you thought about how you want her to feel when she sees you?
01:02:40What do you mean?
01:02:42Just what I said, have you thought about how you want her to feel?
01:02:45We're diving into my inner man a little bit here, aren't we?
01:02:49I'm sorry. I'm getting too personal.
01:02:53No. No, you're fine.
01:02:57Okay, you want to hear a couple of scenarios?
01:02:59If you want to share them.
01:03:01Scenario number one.
01:03:04I get there and I immediately feel guilty
01:03:07because she's married and Paul's right, I never should have come.
01:03:10Kind of like you respecting Brian's marriage by staying away from him.
01:03:14Mary feels awkward too because she knows it's not right that I'm there.
01:03:18And the whole meeting is an absolute disaster.
01:03:23And scenario number two?
01:03:27Scenario number two.
01:03:30I find out that her husband divorced her a few years ago.
01:03:34And she's crushed.
01:03:36When she sees me, she sees an old but very special friend.
01:03:41She forgives me for my immaturity of long ago
01:03:44and we pick up a relationship like it never ended.
01:03:50How does that sound to you?
01:03:52It sounds like a fantasy.
01:03:58I am acting like a high schooler here.
01:04:08Do you think I'm making a mistake doing this?
01:04:10I can't answer that.
01:04:12Why not?
01:04:13I just can't.
01:04:18You think I'm wrong for doing this, don't you?
01:04:20Next question?
01:04:22Come on Carla.
01:04:24Look, I've got to go but I got this for you.
01:04:28What is it?
01:04:29It's for you.
01:04:30Wait a minute, you just got here.
01:04:32Have a good trip, okay?
01:04:33Hey, are you upset?
01:04:35No, not at all.
01:04:36Well you don't have to leave.
01:04:38Have a great trip. Bye.
01:04:43If you and I were married and Brian wanted to talk to you,
01:04:46I'd let him. I'd understand.
01:04:51I'll keep that in mind.
01:05:13I love you.
01:05:43I love you.
01:06:13I love you.
01:06:34Hey, I was thinking about you. How's it going?
01:06:36Well, I'm in a hotel room about five miles from her place.
01:06:40I've got to tell you, I'm pretty nervous.
01:06:42So now what are you going to do?
01:06:43I'm going to drop by her house early this afternoon
01:06:45and try to determine her routine.
01:06:47I don't know if she works or what she does.
01:06:49Or what he does.
01:06:51Well, yeah. You had to say it, didn't you?
01:06:54Sorry.
01:06:55Like I was saying, I don't know what she does.
01:06:58If she stays at home, if she works. I need to know that.
01:07:00What are you going to do, spy on her house?
01:07:02No.
01:07:04Well, it seems like you are.
01:07:06Don't make it sound like I'm stalking her or something.
01:07:08Well, it will be. Sort of.
01:07:12I'm not going to be stalking her.
01:07:14Well, some people might take it that way.
01:07:16Why don't you just drive by and if you see a car, stop in and say hello.
01:07:20Are you crazy?
01:07:22What if her husband's there? I can't do that.
01:07:24Why not?
01:07:25Carla, be serious. I can't do that.
01:07:27Why?
01:07:28I can't.
01:07:30I want to be alone with her.
01:07:32You know what I mean.
01:07:33Well, maybe Paul was right then.
01:07:35What?
01:07:37Whose side are you on here anyway?
01:07:39I'm on your side, silly.
01:07:41Well, it doesn't sound like it to me.
01:07:43I just didn't think you were going to go scope out her house.
01:07:45I mean, is that why you're there for two days?
01:07:48One day to check it out and the next day you're going to...
01:07:50Look, I can't just pop in, all right?
01:07:53And I'm not going to be stalking her.
01:07:55All right. Whatever you say.
01:07:57Just do what you think is best.
01:07:59Just drive by and say hello.
01:08:01What if her husband answers the door? What am I going to do then?
01:08:04Dave, God knows what's going on here. You're not fooling him.
01:08:08Why don't you just knock on the door and leave the results to him?
01:08:16Are you still there?
01:08:17Yeah.
01:08:19Are you okay?
01:08:21Yeah.
01:08:23Look, I'm sorry. I'll talk to you later.
01:08:25Dave.
01:08:26I got to go, okay?
01:08:28Okay.
01:08:30Thanks.
01:08:32I'll see you later.
01:08:34See ya.
01:08:38See ya.
01:09:08Oh, my God.
01:09:38Oh, my God.
01:10:08Oh, my God.
01:10:38Oh, my God.
01:11:08Oh, my God.
01:11:38Oh, my God.
01:12:08Oh, my God.
01:12:38Oh, my God.
01:13:08Oh, my God.
01:13:38Dave.
01:13:40I know what you're going to say.
01:13:42I just get a lot better looking with age.
01:13:44I'm trying to be humble about it, but what can I say?
01:13:47What are you doing here?
01:13:49Well, I was driving by, and I thought I'd take a chance and stop by for a moment.
01:13:53I'm sorry.
01:13:55I'm sorry.
01:13:57I'm sorry.
01:13:59I'm sorry.
01:14:01I'm sorry.
01:14:03I'm sorry.
01:14:05I'm sorry.
01:14:07Can you talk to me for a moment?
01:14:09I'm sorry.
01:14:11I should've called ahead.
01:14:13I hope I'm not interrupting anything.
01:14:15No, it's okay.
01:14:17I'd like to talk to you for a minute if that's all right.
01:14:20Sure.
01:14:22Come in.
01:14:27Are you up visiting your parents?
01:14:30Um, they're fine.
01:14:32My mother told me about your parents.
01:14:34I'm awfully sorry.
01:14:36Look, I'm probably the last person you expected to be standing at your front door today, right?
01:14:40Well, I can't say that I was expecting you.
01:14:42You have a nice house.
01:14:45Thanks. It's home.
01:14:48Well, come on in. Sit down.
01:14:50Thank you.
01:15:00You have two daughters, right? How are they?
01:15:04Fine. My oldest daughter is out of college now, and my youngest just started.
01:15:09College? Wow. You're really getting old.
01:15:13Not any older than you.
01:15:16So, how about you? Are you married? Do you have children?
01:15:19Yes, I have two daughters as well, but no, I'm not married anymore.
01:15:23My wife left me about 20 months ago.
01:15:25I'm sorry to hear that.
01:15:27Yeah, it's been difficult. Long story.
01:15:34How old are your daughters?
01:15:3617 and 15. Ashley and Michelle.
01:15:39They split time between their mother and I.
01:15:42Any chance you might get back together?
01:15:44No, I don't think so.
01:15:48Too much has happened. It's been too painful.
01:15:54Hey, look, it's great to see you.
01:15:57It's nice to see you too.
01:15:59What do you do? Do you work?
01:16:02I'm a secretary over at the elementary school.
01:16:05Yeah? You like it?
01:16:07I love it. I like seeing the kids every day.
01:16:10How about you?
01:16:12I work for a media firm in North Carolina.
01:16:15Marketing. Good job, and I really like the people I work with.
01:16:18That's nice.
01:16:24Do you still do art?
01:16:26Not really. Just a little. I doodle now and then.
01:16:31You sure made some great doodles for me.
01:16:34You know, I really love those things you made me.
01:16:37Do you still have any of them?
01:16:39No. I wish I did.
01:16:42I got rid of them when I got married.
01:16:45I understand.
01:16:49You don't have any of the things I gave you, do you?
01:16:53No, I don't think so.
01:16:56It was at my mom's and when she passed away, I think it just all got thrown out.
01:17:00Threw me out in the trash, eh?
01:17:02Wait a minute. I think I'm the one that got dumped on.
01:17:08And I'm really sorry that I ever did that to you.
01:17:12I'd like to talk with you about it. That's why I came.
01:17:18Mary, I want you to know from the most sincere place in my heart
01:17:22that I'm very sorry I ever broke up with you.
01:17:26And I'm very sorry that I ever hurt you.
01:17:30I never, ever wanted to hurt you and I'm really sorry that I did.
01:17:35We were best friends.
01:17:38I don't know what got into me.
01:17:43We were young.
01:17:48And you said you wanted to date other girls.
01:17:51Yeah, I did. I don't know why.
01:17:54I already had the perfect one for me.
01:17:58In fact, you are still the finest girl I have ever known.
01:18:03I've never loved anybody like I loved you.
01:18:08I don't know what to say.
01:18:12Just know that I'm sorry.
01:18:16And you never did anything wrong. It wasn't your fault.
01:18:20Just know that.
01:18:23Okay.
01:18:26Have you had a good life?
01:18:31Overall, yes.
01:18:36I think we could have had a great life together.
01:18:42Yeah, well, you blew it, buddy.
01:18:46Yeah, I did. I did.
01:18:50Now I'm 47 years old, divorced, two children.
01:18:55And I'm alone.
01:18:59You'll meet someone else.
01:19:02Not like you.
01:19:04You know, I've thought about you so many times over the years.
01:19:09Every January 5th, I'd think about you.
01:19:12Every time I'd hear one of our songs, you'd pop into my mind.
01:19:16I'm flattered. I didn't know.
01:19:20Can I ask you a question?
01:19:23Do you ever think about me?
01:19:29Um...
01:19:33Maybe not like you, but...
01:19:37if I hear a song, it jogs a memory.
01:19:43It's really weird seeing you.
01:19:47You look great.
01:19:49You always did have all the lines, didn't you?
01:19:51It's not a line.
01:19:55You know, those two years, four months and 28 days
01:19:59that we dated were the greatest days of my life.
01:20:02I'm surprised you know that.
01:20:05What, how long we dated? Hey, I remember.
01:20:08We had a great year that first year together, didn't we?
01:20:13Yeah. Yeah, we did.
01:20:17Do you remember that letter you wrote me
01:20:19where you pretended we were married and we had two kids?
01:20:23Letter?
01:20:26I don't.
01:20:29It was during the summer, and I had come to your school.
01:20:31I was working out on your track.
01:20:33You came over and visited with me, and you gave me that letter.
01:20:36I don't remember. I'm sorry.
01:20:39See, you are getting older. Your memory's shot.
01:20:44It was a great letter, though.
01:20:47Nice thought.
01:20:50Do you still run?
01:20:53No, no, I don't run anymore.
01:20:56I shoot hoops now and then to keep myself in shape.
01:20:59You always wanted to be good at basketball.
01:21:03Yeah, I'm still trying, I guess.
01:21:06It is so weird to see you again after all these years.
01:21:11I've thought about you so many times.
01:21:13I always wondered how you were doing.
01:21:15I'm doing okay.
01:21:23Well, I could sit here and walk down memory lane with you all day,
01:21:27but that probably wouldn't be wise.
01:21:30I should go.
01:21:33I just wanted you to know that I was sorry.
01:21:36I hope I didn't make you feel uncomfortable.
01:21:39No, you didn't.
01:21:41I'm sorry.
01:21:42I hope I didn't make you feel uncomfortable.
01:21:46No.
01:21:48No, you were fine.
01:21:50Just surprised me a little.
01:22:06You know, I need to tell you something else.
01:22:09When I was a kid, we never talked about spiritual things.
01:22:14We both believed in God,
01:22:16but the spiritual aspect just didn't exist.
01:22:19At least I know it wasn't in my being.
01:22:22But after we broke up and I moved south,
01:22:25I met a girl who was a Christian,
01:22:28and she told me about Jesus Christ
01:22:31and how important it was that I receive Him into my life.
01:22:34And I looked into it.
01:22:36In 1979, I accepted Him as my Lord and Savior,
01:22:40and the moment I did, my spiritual eyes were opened.
01:22:45I'd like to ask you to look into it, too.
01:22:49It's most important.
01:22:55I'd better go.
01:22:59Tell your parents I said hello.
01:23:02Thanks for talking with me.
01:23:14Of all the things you ever made me,
01:23:18did I ever tell you what my favorite was?
01:23:21No.
01:23:23It was that drawing of the sun and the clouds and the rainbow.
01:23:28You remember that?
01:23:29Yes.
01:23:32Do you remember what it said?
01:23:37What did it say?
01:23:42Me and you, us forever.
01:23:50It's too bad it didn't happen.
01:23:59Goodbye.
01:24:17Goodbye, Mrs. Simmons.
01:24:29Goodbye.
01:24:59Goodbye.
01:25:29Goodbye.
01:25:59Goodbye.
01:26:01Goodbye.
01:26:28Hey.
01:26:30I owe you an apology.
01:26:34The way I ended that phone call today was just wrong.
01:26:37I'm sorry.
01:26:39No, it's okay.
01:26:41I never meant to treat you like that.
01:26:44It's okay.
01:26:51I want to thank you for being there for me through all this.
01:26:57You've been great.
01:27:01Well, it's late.
01:27:04Good night.
01:27:07Dave?
01:27:11How did it go?
01:27:17The way it was supposed to.
01:27:22See you Tuesday night?
01:27:30Okay.
01:28:00Bye.
01:28:30Bye.
01:29:00Bye.
01:29:30Bye.
01:30:00Bye.
01:30:30Bye.
01:31:00Bye.
01:31:30Bye.