Jay King and Sam “Jam” Packard answer all your questions on the Celtics offseason, summer league, Team USA, life and much more
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00:00Still Potable, Still Potable, Pots and Pans, Still Potable, Still Potable
00:06Oh Yeah!
00:09Still Potable, Still Potable, Pots and Pans, Still Potable, Still Potable
00:15Banner 18
00:18J. King, Jaron Packard and the B-Roll
00:20Still Potable, Still Potable
00:23The Jay-Z, White and the K-Doll-O
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00:30Still Potable, Still Potable, Still Potable
00:33Pots and Pans, Still Potable, Still Potable
00:36Oh Yeah!
00:39Still Potable, Still Potable, Pots and Pans, Still Potable
00:44Welcome back to Still Potable, the best Celtics podcast
00:49covering the 2024 NBA Champion Boston Celtics
00:52I am Sam Jan Packard, joined by J. King
00:56who's off in a tropical location on an island right now
01:00This is the free version of Still Potable
01:04We are here for you on Patreon every day of the week
01:07Go to patreon.com slash stillpotable
01:09if you want awesome Celtics coverage every single day, Monday through Friday
01:13This is the free version, that means we are on the CLNS YouTube page
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01:29Today we are doing a summertime mailbag
01:33But J., you are coming to us from Chilmark, Massachusetts
01:38It's a wonderful town, and it just reminded me of a story
01:41A basketball related story
01:43So I grew up, my uncle used to have a house there
01:45Related story with Chilmark, huh?
01:47Yeah, so my uncle used to have a house there
01:50And we would go, like in June, before he started renting it out
01:54We'd go one week in June every year
01:56And one time my brother went, and we brought our friend Will
01:59Shout out to Wilbiss the Dairy Fairy Ham again
02:02And we were playing
02:04His name is Wilbiss the Dairy Fairy Ham again
02:08Not officially, but that's what we called him
02:12Actually, we called him Ham because
02:16We were in Menemsha, and we were crabbing
02:19And he fell into the water, and then we threw ham on his back
02:22And then we started calling him Ham after that
02:24Why did you just have ham?
02:27The ham was the bait for the crabs?
02:29Yeah, because normally we used bait
02:32We got it from Larson's Fish Market in Menemsha
02:34But they didn't have it, so we had to go to the Sitco
02:37And we just got Lunchables, so we used ham from the Lunchables
02:41And then it fell off the hook, and then Will went in
02:44And then we threw ham on his back
02:46Good times
02:47But that's not even the story I was trying to tell
02:50We were playing basketball at the Chilmark
02:52Whatever, high school or whatever
02:54School is there, there's basketball court
02:56And my brother had just realized that he could dunk
03:02So he just kept on trying it
03:04Do you remember being able to dunk?
03:07Yeah, no, I mean, I'm not going to recognize that
03:10Because you'll hear the story
03:12He was trying like a bunch
03:14And he was basically trying the entire time we were there
03:16The entire time we were in Martha's Vineyard
03:18And then one time he finally got it
03:21And both Will and I saw him dunk
03:24But until this day, neither Will and I will admit that we saw him dunk
03:28And we will completely deny that my brother ever dunked that basketball
03:32And it happened there in Chilmark, Massachusetts
03:34So, there you go
03:36He never dunked
03:38Why would you terrorize your brother like that?
03:41That seems like something you guys should be proud of
03:44Also, he must have dunked other times
03:47It wasn't just like he dunked once in Chilmark
03:50And then never dunked again
03:52So it was acknowledged later on that he dunked
03:54Nope, he never dunked ever
03:56I think he only dunked once in Chilmark and never dunked again
04:00How tall was the hoop?
04:02You can go to it now, 10 foot hoop
04:05The one by the General Store?
04:07Yeah
04:08I played there
04:10Won some one-on-one there
04:12Last year
04:13One of my college teammates
04:15Has a place here
04:17And so I come to visit him
04:19And we usually play
04:20Although I didn't bring a basketball this time
04:22Messed up
04:23You should go to the galley right now and get some soft serve
04:26If you really know what's up
04:28Oh, the galley?
04:30The galley's what's up
04:31The galley's what's good
04:32This is good regional Martha's Vineyard analysis to start out the podcast
04:37I like it
04:38Today we are doing a mailbag
04:40We asked the fine folks of Patreon
04:42To hit us with some mailbag questions
04:44And so we'll answer them
04:46We'll talk about whatever they asked us to talk about
04:48We had a decent number of questions
04:50We got like, they're from five different Patreons
04:53And so, Patrons
04:55But we'll crank through them all
04:57I'm just gonna go in the order that I see them
05:00This one's from Joey C
05:03Why does Kada shoot so many threes in warm-ups
05:05If he isn't gonna shoot them in a game
05:07Even summer league games?
05:11Gotta work on expanding your game
05:13I feel like
05:15Adding a three-pointer to your game
05:17And doing so at an NBA level
05:19Is something that you don't just add overnight
05:21It's something that takes time to work on
05:23Time to, like, just develop
05:26And eventually
05:28Then you start to gain the confidence to do it
05:32Like, Aaron Baines did not
05:34Just become a three-point shooter
05:36In the playoffs when Joel Embiid
05:38Was guarding him in the middle of the paint
05:40And daring him to shoot
05:42Aaron Baines worked on that day after day
05:44Until it worked out
05:46That he was open in the playoffs
05:48And then he was confident enough to make it
05:50So, just a tool to add to your game, I guess
05:54Didn't you tell me a week ago
05:56That Luke Cornett should never attempt
05:58Another three in his career?
06:01I'm not sure if I said it exactly like that
06:03I'm not also
06:05Also not advocating for
06:07Nemi to just start launching threes
06:10At will
06:12With no conscience
06:14That said
06:16If you're in the NBA
06:18In the year 2024
06:20And you're not working on
06:22Developing an outside shot
06:24You're probably doing it wrong
06:27Alright, this one's also from Joey C
06:29What's your favorite playoff series
06:31Of the Tatum-Brown era?
06:34Ooh
06:36Um
06:38That's a good question
06:40Favorite playoff series
06:42You know what was a great one?
06:44Was the
06:46The time they beat Miami
06:48In the conference finals to go to the finals
06:50That was
06:52An incredible series
06:54With an almost
06:56Collapse
06:58Because Jimmy Butler almost
07:00Hit a three to go ahead in the final seconds
07:04And it got the Celtics to the finals
07:06And it led
07:08All those guys to just be so so happy
07:10Because they finally
07:12Broke through one of their barriers
07:14Which was getting out of the Eastern Conference
07:16So
07:18I would say that
07:20Those were not pretty games
07:22They were just disgusting games a lot of the time
07:24With the heat just totally disrupting
07:26What they wanted to do but there were so many tough guys
07:28In that series
07:30It was just like every single person
07:32On that court like you had to be an
07:34Absolute grown man
07:36To be out there and so
07:38Those series were a lot of fun
07:40And it was
07:42Back and forth
07:44It felt like
07:48True but it felt like the Celtics won games
07:50One three five and seven
07:52And it was just like constantly back and forth
07:54The other one I thought of is against
07:56Milwaukee
07:58Just taking down
08:00Giannis who's like indestructible
08:02Tatum has the 46
08:04Point game in game six the
08:06Grant Williams game in game seven
08:08The other one popped into my brain was the
08:10Confetti
08:12Series against the Sixers just because
08:14That was like a lot of fun and you didn't really
08:16Expect that and
08:18The one I also think of is the finals
08:20Win over the Mavericks because
08:22The finals and
08:24That was pretty fucking sweet
08:26Yeah the other one I would
08:28Add is
08:30I would
08:32Say the one even though they
08:34Lost it the one against LeBron
08:36In 2018
08:38When you didn't know
08:40What to expect from the Celtics you didn't know
08:42What to expect from Terry Rozier
08:44Jason Tatum Jalen Brown and those guys
08:46Just played above their heads or above
08:48What everyone expected from them
08:50And gave LeBron fits
08:52In the conference finals I think that
08:54That series was
08:56Really not just like
08:58Like a super
09:00Competitive series but also a sign
09:02Of things to come and a sign of all the success
09:04That Jason Tatum and Jalen
09:06Brown would eventually have together
09:10This question
09:12Before we go to that what's the worst series
09:14Was it the Kyrie against
09:16The Bucks definitely
09:18Or
09:20Yeah that was
09:22That was bad I would say
09:24The Nets series when Jalen was hurt
09:26And
09:28At least he got a Tatum 50 burger in that
09:30Yeah but it was like
09:32Romeo Langford was playing I think he
09:34Started some games Jabari Parker was
09:36Playing significant minutes they were just
09:38Totally outmatched it they got
09:40Absolutely cooked and that Nets team
09:42Before they got hurt like that team
09:44Was was going to win a championship
09:46That team was the best team in the league that team
09:48Was basically unstoppable offensively
09:50And
09:52Won the championship of Kevin Durant
09:54As like a half an inch
09:56Back I feel like they would have beat the Suns
09:58In the finals that year
10:00Kevin Durant I believe disagreed
10:02He said he was too fast
10:04He played too many minutes
10:06I think he would have roast the occasion
10:08Hey do you know what's fun
10:10Summertime activity going down
10:12To Fenway and watching
10:14The Red Sox play baseball
10:16I did it a couple days ago
10:18And it was a lot of fun and I got there using
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10:44You could have seen the Boston Celtics
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10:50Looking like a second baseman
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11:36Is there any chance Drew Peterson
11:38Plays with the Celtics this year on a two-way
11:40I love a Drew Peterson
11:42Question who would have suspected
11:44Drew Peterson question
11:46I mean I believe he signed on a two-way
11:48Contract so
11:50There's a chance
11:54Would I be shocked if it becomes
11:56Like Nathan Knight last year where
11:58He's on a two-way contract
12:00Celtics still look for
12:02Other guys to
12:04Supplant him do you think Nathan
12:06Knight got a ring
12:10No one has a ring yet but you think Nathan
12:12Knight's getting a ring
12:14That's a good question
12:16Can you text Nathan
12:18Knight for us
12:20I'll see if
12:22I can find out whether Nathan Knight will
12:24Get a ring thank you
12:26We got two
12:28Questions from AJ here is there
12:30A Longmeadow Lancer highlight reel
12:32Of the kid in high school
12:34There
12:36Probably is somewhere but it was like
12:38Pre
12:40The dawn of the internet
12:42Yeah pre like
12:44Internet getting big era
12:46So I don't think there's one
12:48On the internet I probably
12:50Have one somewhere
12:52Did you send tapes to colleges
12:54Yeah I definitely
12:56Sent tapes to colleges
12:58I think I mostly sent
13:00Kid with like in comic sans
13:02Graphics and stuff like that I wasn't
13:04I wasn't the kid at that age
13:06I was I would argue that's when
13:08You were the most the kid
13:10Yeah some people would
13:12Argue the wrong things I agree
13:16But but no I wasn't the kid but
13:18I would I would say
13:20There's got to be some out there
13:22I'll see if I can track some down
13:24And it probably
13:26Wouldn't be like a highlight tape though it would probably be
13:28Like a full game tape
13:30If you want to watch a full game of
13:32High school JK
13:34I feel bad for you
13:36But I'll try to get it anyway that'd be funny
13:38To like put on the Patreon
13:40And allow people to watch
13:42That's good summer content on the Patreon
13:44This one's also from AJ if you're back home
13:46In Long Meadow slash Western Mass for a visit
13:48What's the first food spot
13:50You're heading up
13:52I love the Western Mass questions
13:54There are two
13:56Probably
13:58First would be Joe's Pizza in
14:00Northampton which is just a great
14:02Spot and a place
14:04That my family has gone for a long long time
14:06There's some nostalgia there and then
14:08Number two would be White Hut White Hut
14:10Has just fantastic burgers
14:12Amazing burgers and it's just a cool
14:14Cool environment where
14:16If anyone
14:18Has been there you'll know what I'm talking about
14:20But you say the order and
14:22They don't write it down they just
14:24Like do their thing behind the
14:26Counter there's no writing it down
14:28It's just like they work
14:30Beautifully together
14:32Wait
14:34It's like a sit down spot and a waiter comes
14:36Up to you or it's just like
14:38You order at the counter
14:40And it's just chaos in there and somehow
14:42They don't ever fuck up orders and they
14:44Always get it right it's incredible
14:46Oh
14:48Shout out to White Hut
14:50This question's
14:52From
14:54Kurt it's a long one so I'll
14:56Do it
14:58Would it be beneficial for us to start
15:00Talking about paying the tax as a positive
15:02Thing I get it we all have fear
15:04Of taxes but if we are not paying it
15:06Then it's safe to assume our team will not
15:08Be very competitive in comparison
15:10To other teams paying over the cap
15:12Golden State needed to win
15:14Needed it in order to win three titles
15:16Also the money goes back to helping other
15:18Small part market teams stay in business
15:20And help grow the NBA brand
15:22Which has become an amazing product
15:24Worldwide also the WNBA
15:26Is growing and this may not have been possible
15:28Without the money that's filtering in
15:30So maybe and a big fucking
15:32Maybe he says one day we can look at the tax
15:34As if it's a good thing
15:36If it's something
15:38What do you think about that framing
15:40Of the luxury tax
15:42That's an optimistic view
15:44Extremely optimistic view
15:46Not only does it help the Celtics
15:48It helps
15:50The society
15:52It helps the San Antonio
15:54Spurs it helps
15:56How do you feel
15:58About paying your income taxes
16:04You don't want to help with roads
16:06You don't want to pay for like a
16:08Fire
16:10I wish there was just someone
16:12To take care of that for me
16:16Austin Celtics could take
16:18Overview and pay the tax
16:20Yeah
16:22If I had a
16:24Donor who was willing to pay all my taxes
16:26So that it would not be a detriment
16:28To society
16:30But I could keep all my money
16:32It's almost like you're advocating for
16:34Taxing the wealthiest individuals
16:36Who are basically all of our donors
16:38Where's your civic pride
16:40Pay your taxes and take pride in it
16:42You're in a society
16:44Someone should be able to pick me as a donor
16:46Someone should be like
16:48You know what I want to pay that guy's taxes
16:50That would be cool
16:52If there was a program where people could do that
16:54You think people would pick you out of everyone
16:56Like if you were on a portal
16:58Or something
17:00Like hi I'm Jay King
17:02Here's why I think you should pay my taxes
17:04I would hope that one of our listeners
17:06Would be super wealthy
17:08And would just be like you know what
17:10Jay's taxes mean nothing to me
17:12So I'd love to help him out
17:14I have the belief that I'll pay my own taxes
17:16And I would hope that person willing to pay my taxes
17:18Would just give that money away
17:20Because you know I believe in good government
17:22And think more people could benefit from that
17:24And I believe it's my civic duty
17:26Whatever happened to civic republicanism
17:28That this country was founded on Jay
17:30You know
17:32I prefer
17:34Keeping money
17:36Yeah you and everyone else
17:38Civic keeping money
17:40No I didn't
17:42I just want my money
17:44Swing and a miss
17:46This is the first one
17:48This one's from
17:50Brandon
17:52And it's kind of a
17:56Is Ball
17:58Indeed life
18:00Yeah
18:02Yeah it is
18:04I think that's fair
18:06I think Ball is more life
18:08For you than it is for me
18:10I don't think anyone's going to be surprised to say that
18:12But I think
18:14I know a couple people in my life that Ball is life
18:16And like it truly
18:18Applies to you
18:20And I would say Nick Friedman
18:22And then no one else really compares on that level
18:24In terms of like people I know
18:26Does he watch the basketball tournament
18:28As well
18:30Yeah he was watching Japanese basketball
18:32The other day
18:34Was he watching Ryan Richmond
18:36Yeah I think they're boys
18:38Really good for him
18:40He's a step above me
18:42I've never watched the
18:44Japanese leagues
18:46But I will watch
18:48Jared Sullinger in the basketball tournament
18:50I will watch Eric Bledsoe and Darren Collison
18:52In the basketball tournament
18:54That is stuff I absolutely love
18:56Did you watch
18:58I didn't get a chance
19:00Did you watch USA Germany
19:02Yeah
19:04USA doesn't look great
19:08There's just something missing there
19:10They don't know how to play together
19:12Jason Tatum his role just keeps being minimized
19:14LeBron was awesome though
19:16LeBron was fantastic
19:18LeBron kept them from losing
19:20Germany is really good
19:22Yeah
19:24They got both
19:26Solid squad
19:28They won the world cup
19:30Alright Jay
19:32This is our first one from
19:34LE
19:36Would you rather lose
19:38Competitive 7 game series on a buzzer
19:40Beater or get swept
19:42And each game is a 30 plus point
19:44Blowout
19:46You're pretty evenly matched going into the series
19:48So it would just be embarrassing to get
19:50Blown out like that
19:52But it's a team you think you could beat
19:54So
19:56My answer is going to be kind of philosophical
19:58I thought
20:00Your answer was going to be
20:02I would prefer not to lose
20:04I appreciate you actually
20:06Answering the question
20:08In the question there was no option
20:10Not to lose
20:12So obviously you prefer not to lose
20:14Obviously if I were on a team
20:16We would not lose
20:18But
20:20I think it depends on if
20:22The team needs to get broken up
20:24And
20:26If they're like due for a shakeup
20:28If they need an overhaul
20:30Then losing by 30 every game
20:32Is not going to be effective
20:34Because then it forces you to rip off the bandaid
20:36It forces you to just say you know what
20:38Let's try something new
20:40Let's come back next year
20:42Try something different
20:44But
20:46If you lose in a close series
20:48You can be like you know what
20:50This team was close
20:52And if you actually are close
20:54Then that works
20:56Keep everybody together
20:58Give it another shot
21:00I think I'd rather lose on the blowout
21:02I mean
21:04No rather lose on the buzzer beater
21:06Because then you can be like man
21:08We were so close
21:10Let's build it back for next year
21:12Let's be driven
21:14I think you can make a good point
21:16It depends on how the team building is going
21:18Your answer was so good
21:20That I didn't even know how to answer
21:22That's kind of annoying
21:24My answer was fantastic
21:26This one is from Grant
21:28NBA commissioner for the upcoming season
21:30What changes do you make
21:32And why is the obvious answer
21:34Changing the NBA in-season tournament courts
21:36I gotta say I like those
21:38I like those wacky courts
21:40Those courts stink
21:42Those courts were different and weird
21:44Just can't do the red ones
21:46But I'm all for anything weird like that
21:48Not me
21:50Give me a classic court
21:52Give me a regular court
21:54Give me a court that doesn't hurt my eyes on TV
21:56What else
21:58I actually think
22:00This entire
22:02CBA is stupid
22:06I think the idea of
22:08Trying to break up dynasties
22:10And trying to break up teams that are
22:12Built the right way
22:14And have more talent than other teams
22:16Is stupid
22:18I think this league was built on dynasties
22:20It was built on
22:22The Celtics initially
22:24And then it was
22:26Larry Bird and Magic Johnson
22:28And then it was Michael Jordan and the Bulls
22:30It was the
22:32Lakers and Shaq and Kobe
22:34There's always been
22:36A dynasty that pushes
22:38The game forward
22:40Grabs more eyeballs
22:42Convinces more people to care
22:44And as good as parody sounds
22:46To owners I'm sure
22:48All it does is
22:50Save idiots from acting like idiots
22:52And give idiots
22:54More of a chance than they deserve
22:56So to me
23:00The rules should allow
23:02Teams to keep great great teams
23:04Together and the
23:06Idea that you have to
23:08Sacrifice future first round picks
23:10And pay
23:12Hundreds of millions of dollars in luxury
23:14Tax just to keep a great
23:16Group together is
23:18Bad to me and backwards
23:20For the game
23:22That was a pretty serious answer
23:24I think
23:26The fact that they
23:28Signed a
23:30Suck
23:32I think the fact that they signed a giant television
23:34Deal for billions and billions of dollars
23:36Means that they feel like something's working
23:38There
23:40I think it's also weird to have it be
23:42So complicated where it's like
23:44Second apron it's like
23:46The casual fan should just be able to understand
23:48The
23:50CBA and I understand
23:52Owners want basically a hard cap
23:54Which they have
23:56My answer
23:58I'll just get rid of replay
24:00Replay stinks
24:02Replay like ruins the flow of the game
24:04It's fine
24:06If a ref gets a call wrong
24:08That happens that's part of the game
24:10Just keep playing basketball
24:12I just hate all the pauses we have
24:14Replays challenges suck
24:16It's not naturally part of the game
24:18The super slowdown challenges
24:20Where like one defender clearly knocks the ball
24:22Out of bounds but like it brushes
24:24Off in super slow-mo off the guy's hand
24:26Or even
24:28If you want to allow replay you shouldn't
24:30Be able to replay in slow motion
24:32It should just be the ref like making a
24:34Decision refs being bad at their
24:36Jobs as part of the game
24:38Replay stinks
24:40I would love to get rid of
24:42Replay challenges
24:44As a Celtics fan
24:46That would be
24:48You getting rid of
24:50Getting rid of
24:52An advantage that the Celtics had
24:54This past season
24:56Joe Mizzou
24:58Through Matt Reynolds was
25:00An elite elite challenger
25:02This past season
25:04He did it on high volume
25:06He did it with a great success rate
25:08He maximized his challenges to give his team
25:10An ever so slight advantage
25:12So I think
25:14With this
25:16You'd be giving up a Celtics advantage
25:18Congratulations
25:20Alright
25:22I'm fine with that
25:24What lineups are you looking forward
25:26To most to seeing this preseason
25:34All the same lineups that kicked ass last year
25:36Maybe
25:38Yeah
25:40But then it's like Luke Cornette
25:42Or Xavier Tillman will play
25:44Oh wow so new
25:46Pick a lineup
25:48Pick a new lineup you're willing to see
25:50Any lineup with Baylor Shireman
25:52Give me the new guy
25:54Give me somebody fresh
25:58That's about it
26:00Okay this one's also
26:02From Grant
26:04He challenges you to a three point shooting competition
26:06Anywhere in the greater Boston area
26:08The court of your choice
26:10Loser has to do 50 pushups
26:12On camera
26:14Which is something you have failed to do earlier in the year
26:16And we lost that episode
26:18Because the recording didn't work
26:20Grant thinks he's going to beat me in a three point shooting contest
26:22He does
26:24It's not even a question it's just a challenge
26:26Yes yes yes
26:28Yes yes
26:30We are absolutely doing that sometime this summer
26:32We will set it up
26:34I don't know where we will do it but we will find a court
26:36And
26:38He'll be doing 50 pushups
26:40On camera but it'll be fun
26:44Fantastic I look forward to that
26:46That'll be good content
26:48Alright now we have a run of just absurd questions
26:50From Ellie that I think all are pretty great
26:52And I want you to really think hard about them
26:54We'll start with the sports ones
26:56I always think hard
26:58Would you rather all your teams
27:00Absolutely
27:02Thank you for answering these questions
27:04To tell me that I need to think hard
27:06Like I don't always think hard
27:08No but these ones aren't basketball related
27:10With the proper respect
27:12No because sometimes you just miss the non-basketball ones
27:14If it deserves to be dismissed
27:16I'll dismiss it
27:18Would you rather all your teams win a championship
27:20In one calendar year but then never again
27:22For the rest of your life
27:24Or just let things play out naturally
27:26Naturally 100%
27:28It's no fun if you know what's going to happen
27:30Yeah
27:32If you know forever that your teams are doomed
27:34What's the point of rooting for them anymore
27:36It would destroy
27:38It would destroy rooting for them
27:40Unless you don't know they're doomed
27:42And then you can get your hopes up still
27:44And then you can enjoy the ride
27:46So
27:48Oh yeah it says in either scenario
27:50You don't know what's happening or the future outcomes
27:52Okay
27:54Yeah so that changes things a little bit
27:56However
27:58The most
28:00Fun I ever had
28:02Rooting for a team
28:04Was when the 2004 Red Sox
28:06Broke through
28:08And the reason why that was magical
28:10The reason why I went streaking
28:12Through the town
28:14When they finished off the Cardinals that season
28:16Yes
28:18Like you got butt ass naked
28:20Oh yeah
28:22Why
28:24No one wants to see your 15 year old
28:26But the
28:28Reason why I did that
28:30Was because of all the losses
28:32That I went through year after year
28:34Watching them
28:36All of that made that win
28:38So much sweeter
28:40So much sweeter
28:42And so
28:44I think as amazing as it would be
28:46To see your team win so many
28:48In a calendar year
28:50The droughts
28:52Are actually what make
28:54The titles so great
28:56And the titles are great anyway
28:58They're fantastic if you do them every
29:00Every other year they're fantastic if your team
29:02Gets them
29:04Once every three years once every four years
29:06If they're regular champions
29:08Salute to you you've had a great time
29:10As a fan
29:12But the droughts make them special
29:14And I've never had
29:16The same type of experience
29:18Rooting for the Red Sox after that
29:20It was never the same
29:22And the reason for that was because
29:24It never could be
29:26After all the heartache that May 2004
29:28Just spectacular
29:30Spare point
29:32Alright you answered that question well
29:34Kill fuck mary
29:36Mexican food
29:38Italian food
29:40Chinese food
29:42You gotta kill
29:44Chinese food
29:46You don't have to
29:48Fuck mexican food
29:50I mean it's a personal
29:52Preference but you are wrong it's mary mexican
29:54Food
29:56Uh
29:58I would agree kill chinese food
30:00Fuck italian food
30:02Okay so you would have mexican food
30:04Every day
30:06Yeah absolutely I would have a burrito
30:08Every single day quesadilla enchiladas
30:10It's fantastic
30:12You know the level of mud butt
30:14That you would set yourself up for
30:16I would be strengthening my colon
30:18I would be dominating it
30:20I would be building up a
30:22Resistance to mud butt
30:26How much pasta would you have
30:28You'd be a fat fuck
30:30I'm already a fat fuck
30:32You'd be even fatter
30:34Yeah
30:36That doesn't phase me
30:38Well I guess we have different priorities
30:40I want to stay lean and fit
30:42And you just don't want mud butt
30:44I think it's just two different lives
30:46I don't want to
30:48Spend my entire day on the toilet
30:50I just don't that doesn't happen
30:52To me anytime I have mexican food
30:54That's not like a regular occurrence
30:56I mean you're a better man than I am
30:58Honestly
31:00Would you rather have to drink exclusively
31:02Out of a two liter bottle or a shot glass
31:08It's got to be a two liter bottle
31:10You cannot go through life
31:12Where everything is out of a shot glass
31:14Do you know how annoying that would get
31:16It's so obnoxious
31:20Imagine if you were really thirsty
31:22And you just wanted a big thing of water
31:24It would be so annoying
31:26To do shot glass
31:28You've played a basketball game
31:30And you're just putting your little shot glass
31:32Out there
31:34Taking a little sip
31:36No you need the two liter
31:40I'd be fine with a two liter
31:42That wouldn't faze me
31:44I could go around drinking everything out of a two liter
31:46And I'd be okay
31:48I mean it wouldn't be ideal
31:50You'd be the two liter guy
31:52And you'd have a reputation around the neighborhood
31:54Oh there's the weirdo with his two liter
31:56Would you be
31:58Would you be ashamed of being the two liter guy
32:00I think it'd be okay
32:02I don't think I'd be ashamed of it
32:04Why would you be worried about what strangers
32:06Think of you as a two liter guy
32:08It'd be what I think of myself
32:10It just seems like a burden
32:12To be constantly carrying around a two liter
32:14What if I'm thirsty
32:16Do you constantly carry around
32:18A water glass with you
32:20Like no you don't
32:22No but I'm open to other forms of beverages
32:24Like imagine going to a restaurant
32:26And then ordering something
32:28And then having to pour it into your two liter
32:30And then drink it out of that
32:32The rules don't stipulate
32:36I feel like this would be a societal thing
32:38Like you
32:40Under no scenario would you just
32:42Have to bring a two liter with you
32:44Would you rather drink exclusively
32:46Exclusively out of a two liter
32:48Or a shot glass
32:50I'm saying this would have to be a societal change
32:52Everybody is drinking out of a two liter
32:54It's just you
32:56You can't change society to conform with your
32:58Weird like genie stipulations
33:00That's not how the game works
33:02I just don't see a scenario
33:04Where
33:06Any of this is realistic
33:08What the fuck
33:10I think a giant societal change
33:12Could lead to
33:14Two liter chaos
33:16One day
33:18Alright if you could pick one former
33:20And one current Celtic to run for president
33:22And vice president who are you picking
33:24You need one of each
33:26You can choose which ones which
33:28One current and one former Celtic
33:30Um
33:34Do they have to be alive
33:36No
33:38They don't
33:40The question didn't stipulate that but I
33:42Um I'm saying no
33:44Because Bill Russell is my president
33:48And
33:50Who would be the vice president
33:52On his ticket
33:54We have to be a current Celtic
33:56Jalen Brown feels like the obvious choice
33:58However
34:02I feel like Derek White
34:04Is just a beloved human
34:06Who would
34:08Dislike Derek White
34:10He would be the most
34:12Beloved vice presidential candidate
34:14He would automatically
34:16Endear you to
34:18The entire world
34:20If it's a
34:22Decent ticket I think it's
34:24Not gonna
34:26Can I say Brad Stevens
34:28Does it have to be a player
34:30It does have to be a player
34:32How weird would Joe Mazzuolo be
34:34As president of the United States of America
34:36We would be in so many
34:38Wars
34:40Everything would be a battle for him
34:42Although he might get stuff done
34:44I don't know
34:46He'd probably institute prayers in schools
34:48I don't know
34:50I don't think he would actually
34:52Send the country to war
34:54All the time
34:56I think that would have a negative effect
34:58If the president was constantly talking about fighting wars
35:00It didn't on the Celtics
35:02When he constantly talked about
35:04Fighting wars and then
35:06Won the NBA championship
35:08It's almost like those things are very different
35:10You wanna hear my ticket
35:12Are they
35:14Leading men is leading men
35:16You're leading a nation made up of
35:18Everyone
35:20Not just 12 basketball players
35:22It was more like 17 or 18
35:24Fair enough
35:26My ticket
35:28President
35:30Luke Cornett
35:32Vice president Evan Turner
35:36Tell me what's wrong with that
35:38I like that
35:40How serious would Evan Turner be
35:42In his role
35:44That's exactly why he's on the thing
35:46He's to distract, he's to clown other people
35:48He's to go after my political enemies
35:50And that's political enemies
35:52He's a complete distraction as vice president
35:54The vice president doesn't have a role
35:56They don't do anything
35:58They all they do is break a tie in the senate
36:00Some would say that it's possible the vice president right now is running the country
36:02Some might say that
36:04I don't mean to make this political
36:06And this isn't really political
36:08But I'm just trying to dispute you
36:10Because that's what I do
36:12Well if that's the case they should invoke the 25th amendment
36:14And make her the president then
36:16Because that's not how the system is designed
36:18I don't know what's going to happen tonight when Joe speaks
36:20Do you think he's going to immediately resign
36:22And invoke the 25th amendment
36:24I really don't know much about anything
36:26Going on in the land of America
36:28I just know about basketball
36:30That's fair
36:32I can't predict what will happen with Joe
36:34Alright
36:36We'll move on
36:38Pick a mediocre super power from this list
36:40You get to
36:42You always get pretty good presence
36:44You can read three times
36:46You can read three times faster
36:50It says
36:52Shut up spell for ten minutes
36:54Doesn't work on Jay
36:56I don't know what that means
36:58Shut up spell? What does that mean?
37:00I don't know
37:02I'm just reading you the words
37:04One inch levitation
37:06Breathe underwater for eight minutes
37:08Banana duplication
37:10But you can't use it for economic gain
37:12Or you can
37:14Instakill one person
37:16But their ghost
37:18It says may haunt you
37:20I say their ghost will haunt you
37:22Why are you changing someone's question?
37:24Well because I don't
37:26I don't like the violence on it
37:28I think there should be more consequences for
37:30Instakilling someone
37:32If a ghost tries to haunt me and I've already killed
37:34The real person
37:36I'm killing the ghost too
37:38This guy thinks he can kill a ghost
37:40How are you going to pull that one off?
37:46What was the second one again?
37:48Read three times faster
37:50That seems the most practical
37:52I feel like as boring
37:54As it would be
37:56Like what am I going to get
37:58From being able to breathe underwater
38:00For eight minutes
38:02Do cool tricks at a party
38:06What cool tricks at a party involve
38:08Breathing underwater for eight minutes
38:10Hey guys you want to see how long I can breathe underwater?
38:12Hey guys follow me to the bathtub
38:14Guys let's go
38:16Well it's a pool party presumably
38:18Yeah I guess
38:20But then people
38:22Doing it in the bathtub would be weird
38:24People would think you were dead
38:26And uh
38:28Give me banana duplication
38:34Are you duplicating your own banana?
38:36Yeah
38:38I mean I can't be duplicating other people's bananas
38:40That seems unseemly
38:44Um what reality show
38:46Or game show would you be a contestant on
38:48If you had to pick one
38:56What reality show
38:58I got my answer
39:00It's a lifelong dream of mine
39:02I want to be on the Price is Right
39:04I want to be on the whole fashion good time
39:06Play some Plinko
39:08Wager one dollar
39:10Come on down
39:16What do you mean you never watched it
39:18What happened when you stayed home sick from school
39:20What did you do from 11 to 12
39:22Played basketball
39:24You were sick
39:26I went to the Springfield Jewish Community Center and played basketball
39:28I didn't get sick
39:30If I stayed home it was because I faked sick
39:32And wanted to go play basketball at the Springfield Jewish Community Center
39:34You faked sick
39:36And then your parents would let you go play basketball
39:38That's really giving up your cover
39:40My mom gave me 5 days
39:42To take off
39:44During the school year
39:46She gave you 5 personal days
39:48And she also did not force me to
39:50Um
39:52Go on field trips
39:54So I would skip field trips often
39:56Why wouldn't you want to go on a field trip
39:58Because I'd rather go hoop
40:00You're a sick deranged person
40:02What field trips did you miss
40:04All of them
40:06Most of them
40:08Field trips were stupid
40:10You could have gone to the aquarium
40:12You could have gone to Plymouth Plantation
40:14All stupid places
40:16Plymouth Rock is a bad rock
40:18Overrated rock
40:20Why do I want to go with all the nerds from my class
40:22When I can go to the Springfield Jewish Community Center
40:24With all the cool kids
40:26Who have skipped school with me
40:28Just a gang of people
40:30In Springfield skipping school
40:32At the JCC
40:34Yeah we boycotted field trips
40:36That's just weird
40:38Do you realize that like you're
40:40The weird one in this scenario
40:42Like most people enjoy field trips
40:44I understand that
40:46My path was not the conventional path
40:48However I think everyone else is the weird one
40:52Fair enough
40:54Um I think final question here
40:56And Ellie
40:58Just coming
41:00With the heat
41:02All the ridiculous questions we've just had
41:04All from Ellie
41:06If you could be reborn as anyone from history
41:08Alive or dead
41:10And live their life
41:12Who would you choose and why
41:14Ha ha ha
41:18Um
41:20Ooh
41:22That's a good question
41:24Anyone
41:26From history
41:28I mean this is a very tough question to answer
41:30Because there are so many people
41:32In the history of this world
41:34That you have to
41:36You have the best life
41:38I do
41:40Oh wow
41:42Honestly
41:44If I had to go live someone else's life
41:46I would be surrendering my own
41:48And I'm not willing to do that
41:50I'm not even willing to
41:52To play a charade
41:54That I would give up my own life
41:56That's the biggest cop out answer ever
41:58You expect me to get rid of my wife
42:00And my son
42:02And
42:04And my brothers and my parents
42:06My cousins
42:08Just so that I can
42:10Have a better job, have more power
42:12No
42:14I enjoy my life
42:16Pop right back into their life as it is now
42:18You just take a little break
42:20Did any of those people have
42:22A three point contest with Grant to prepare for
42:24No
42:26You'd be frozen in time
42:28Things wouldn't change
42:30I just think
42:32I'm not willing to give up what I have
42:34And if that makes me wrong
42:36Then so be it
42:38It doesn't by the way
42:40It makes me right
42:42Would you go back and relive your life
42:44With your brain you have now
42:48And relive my life with the brain I have now
42:50Yeah it's just like boom
42:52J King is reborn
42:54But you have the current brain that you have
42:56And you get to relive your entire life
42:58If I did that
43:00Then I would presumably have this same brain
43:02My entire life
43:04Whereas I'm right now continuing to improve
43:06And my better years are ahead of me
43:08No
43:10You would just be growing
43:12But you'd have a fully formed adult brain as a baby
43:14Then you'd grow from there
43:16But you'd just get to relive your own life
43:20You said if I went through all my life
43:22With the same brain I have now
43:26Now you're just playing a semantic game
43:28I'm not playing a semantic game
43:30I'm telling you that
43:32It would be short sighted to go back
43:34And play the first part of my life again
43:36With this same brain
43:38If I had to have the same brain forever
43:40Because my brain is going to continue growing
43:42And going to continue developing
43:44And going to continue
43:46Sending me on my way
43:48Okay
43:54I don't have an answer for this question
43:56It's a very tough question
43:58I'm going to go with Neil Armstrong
44:00Probably pretty cool to be the first guy on the moon
44:04Yeah, cooler to be me
44:06Would you rather go to space
44:08It's not cooler to be you
44:10Than it is to be on Neil Armstrong
44:12Shut the fuck up
44:14You've never spent a day in my life
44:16You've never been to the moon
44:18I'm totally fine with not being in the moon
44:20You think I want to go
44:22You think I want to go in an aircraft
44:24And risk everything
44:26Just to go step on a fucking moon
44:28You really think I want to do that
44:30No, absolutely not
44:32Would you rather go to space
44:34Or deep, deep underwater
44:38Depends if I can hold my breath for 8 minutes
44:40No, you'd be in a submarine
44:44Submarine sounds scarier
44:46I've seen what happens in submarines
44:48We learned that the hard way
44:50That was a poorly made submarine
44:52They were controlling it with a
44:54Freaking controller
44:56Or an Xbox controller
44:58I mean, how are you supposed to
45:00Control a submarine
45:02I don't know, whatever the Navy uses
45:04For those submarines
45:06They don't use an Xbox controller
45:10Probably pretty similar
45:12May not look like an Xbox controller
45:14But they don't have somebody
45:16Down there, I would guess
45:18Running the show
45:20They don't have what
45:22I have no idea how submarines work, by the way
45:24Yeah, I don't know
45:54I don't know
45:56I don't know
45:58I don't know
46:00I don't know
46:02I don't know
46:04I don't know
46:06I don't know
46:08I don't know
46:10I don't know
46:12I don't know
46:14I don't know
46:16I don't know
46:18I don't know
46:20I don't know
46:22I don't know
46:24I don't know
46:26I don't know
46:28I don't know
46:30I don't know
46:32I don't know
46:34I don't know
46:36I don't know
46:38I don't know
46:40I don't know
46:42I don't know
46:44I don't know
46:46I don't know
46:48I don't know