Is it necessary to be in a relationship? || Acharya Prashant, with NIT-Warangal (2022)

Acharya Prashant

‍♂️ Want to meet Acharya Prashant? Be a part of the Live Sessions: https://acharyaprashant.org/hi/enquir...   Want to read Acharya Prashant's Books? Get Free Delivery: https://acharyaprashant.org/en/books?...  ~~~~~  Video Information: NIT-Warangal, 30.03.2022, Greater Noida, India  Context: How to maintain a good relationship? What is the right time to be into a relationship? What is relationship? How to make relationship healthy? When and how a relationship turns into a toxic relationship? How to choose a life partner?  What is real love? Is live-in relationship sign of degradation of our culture?  Music Credits: Milind Date

Transcript

00:00Good evening, sir. My name is Sudhanshu Kamsingh. I'm currently pursuing my B.Tech in Civil

00:07Engineering from NIT Warangal. So my first question is that we see our friends are currently

00:17in relationships. Meanwhile, we are not in a relationship. But at the same time, we have

00:25to focus on our studies as well. But inside us, there's a feeling which says like, you

00:32should be there in our relationship. So, sir, is it really necessary to be in a relationship?

00:39Or if not, then what is this feeling inside us?

00:43See, the feeling inside is just the feeling every creature of flesh and blood has in its

00:56youth. It's just a physical thing. Mother Nature wants you to have a partner from the

01:15opposite sex and sooner or later reproduce. That's the feeling. There's nothing more to

01:22that. There is nothing mystical about that. It's not coming from some unknown source.

01:37It's a very obvious thing. You watch the animals, you come to know. Don't you see you didn't

01:45have this feeling just five or seven years back? And that's pretty recent, right? Just

01:53five years back, you would have been, what, 13 or 15 and this kind of a feeling would

02:01not have been there or wouldn't have been as intense at least. And now you are 18 or

02:0720 or something and maybe 22. And the feeling is stronger. It is the age. It is the age

02:18of the body. It is the stage of the body. Nothing more than that.

02:24So not in that sense. I mean, like we see our friends walking with their partners, talking

02:33with them. The feeling like is it jealousy or is it like the need like we have to share

02:40our thoughts to someone?

02:43You can share your thoughts with your male friends as well. What's the point in asking

02:48for a girl? See, first of all, let's put the sham behind us, as they say, cut the crap.

03:00It's not about sharing your emotions or thoughts or something. It's just about sex. All right.

03:07We want to give it a more respectable face by talking of these things. What do you go

03:16and do with her? No, no, we two just sit down and talk and we share our lives. That's for

03:23the first few days maybe, to make things look respectable and moral. And then there

03:31is just the banging on the bed, nothing more than that, right?

03:36So I don't know why there must be some confusion on that. Is it not obviously clear what that

03:44feeling is all about? See, I am not denigrating it. I am not asking you to be a celibate or

03:52something. I am just answering clearly on what that desire is. That desire has no depth.

04:05That desire does not come from any other point. Understand, when you watch movies, they make

04:15it appear esoteric. They want to also bring in some kind of a spiritual angle. God sends

04:24down people in pairs. There is somebody perfect waiting for you somewhere in the world. Things

04:32like that. So you feel, oh, my life is incomplete and a special someone is hiding somewhere

04:39and that special someone will make me complete. And this kind of storm of thoughts simply

04:49obfuscates the obvious fact. It is an animal thing and nothing more than that. All the

04:57romance and the fairytale-ish delusion you build around sex is just there to conceal

05:11our animalism. Nothing more than that. And by that, I repeat, I am not asking you to

05:19absolutely abstain from the other gender or even sex. But before you get into something,

05:29is it not important that you know what that thing is very clearly? This is that thing.

05:34Nothing more than that. So suppose we assume what you are saying is

05:41correct. No, you don't have to suppose. First of all, I didn't know that this was the feeling

05:50which is inside me. So let us assume that this is the feeling. Why do you want to assume?

05:58Why don't you want to know? This is the opportunity to learn, not to assume. There can be other

06:06reasons as well like not this particular reason which you gave is the correct one.

06:13I am not getting you. What are you saying? You just told about the physical aspects about

06:21those feelings. There may be other options as well, which may be contradict your points.

06:33Or is it the only reason? You want me to say that there do exist three,

06:40four other reasons so that you can say that your reasons come from that other set? Don't

06:49you see what is happening within no self-awareness? When I say that it is just an animal thing,

06:57it sounds so gross, so unworthy, so disrespectable that you want to say well

07:09attraction towards a girl can come from some other center as well. So let's explore the

07:16other centers. Maybe there is a 0.01% probability that it may come from some other place. But do

07:24you belong to 0.01% in anything in life? Then how will it happen that only in this matter you

07:32will belong to an especially exclusive and elite club to which let's say Krishna and Radha belong?

07:38And you want to discount the 99.99% probability. That is something you want to discount and you

07:48want to hang on to hope, the 0.01% hope. No, no, no, I am not chasing her just for sex. It is for

07:56the sake of my enlightenment that I want to take her to bed. Seriously? So disappointed are you?

08:10Even your voice has become feeble. See, I put a disclaimer in advance. I am not saying all this

08:25to wean you away from girls. I am just saying that you must know that when you are going after a girl,

08:33this is what you are doing. And now go after the girl with all your energy. It's okay. But don't

08:39be self-deluded at least. In your age, it will be pretty much impossible to not to chase girls.

08:49Right? You will do that just as all animals do that. I am saying that you must know what you

08:59are doing when you do that. And it's not that just men chase women. Even women chase men. And they

09:07are again doing what all animals do. Probably it is unavoidable, irresistible. Probably this is the

09:16name of the game and probably all of us have to get into it at some point. It's okay. If that's

09:23how our bodies are built, if that's what has been mandated in our DNAs, then let's do it. Because

09:35we hardly have a choice there. But you do have a choice when it comes to knowing. Know what you

09:43are doing. Why do you want to convince yourself that you are marrying, let's say, for the sake

09:51of the world? And there are people who say that, you know, I am marrying because if I do not marry,

09:55you see, there would be population collapse. Elon Musk has told us. And Elon Musk anyway happens

10:04to be my best friend. We went to the same detention center. Okay, sir. Thank you, sir.

10:18You are escaping. You're not learning. I exactly understood your point. And I think maybe this is

10:29the reason. Maybe. I'll more look into this. See, it happens with people who raise these topics

10:39with me. For a few weeks at least, girls will not appear attractive. After that, you will lose all

10:50memory of this unfortunate incident. You will try to forget this like a bad dream and get on

11:03with your usual life. All right. Okay, sir. Thank you, sir. And so, my next question is...

11:13You still have a question. So, Riyansh, I think we should give a chance to the people also and

11:20then you can come back to you for your next question. Okay, sir. Thank you, sir.

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