First broadcast 25th October 2010.
Rhod Gilbert
Greg Davies
Lloyd Langford
Jo Whiley
Adam Hills
Rita Simons
David Tennant
Rhod Gilbert
Greg Davies
Lloyd Langford
Jo Whiley
Adam Hills
Rita Simons
David Tennant
Category
📺
TVTranscript
00:00Tonight on Ask Rod Gilbert, our special guests are, she knows all there is to know in Albert
00:24Square, it's Rita Simons, and the brilliant Australian comedian Adam Hills. They're here
00:31every week, still with a funny story to tell, it's Greg Davies, and it's Rod's flatmate,
00:37Lloyd. Ladies and gentlemen, Ask Rod Gilbert.
00:49Hello, welcome, yes, my name is Rod Gilbert and tonight my job is to find the answers
00:54to the questions that keep us all awake at night. Questions like, wouldn't Susan Boyle
00:58have been better off releasing a pamphlet than a book? People thought I looked like
01:01I couldn't sing, turns out I can. The end. Some questions go to the heart of who we are.
01:08Questions of national importance such as, why do newspapers keep giving me meaningless
01:12facts and statistics? You're more likely to get divorced than you are to change your bank.
01:17What am I supposed to do with that information? What am I supposed to do? If you told me I
01:22was more likely to get divorced than stay married, then fair enough. But who's going
01:25to think, blimey, changing banks is a bit of a palaver, I know, I'll get shot at the
01:28missus instead. Sorry love, you had to go, it was either that or try and cancel a few
01:33direct debits. You'll find someone else. You'll see the kids in the bank every now and again.
01:37We'll look back at this and laugh when our new checkbooks come through. And what about
01:42this one? There's more germs in your kitchen sink than there are in the lavatory. What
01:47am I going to do with that? Wash up in the toilet? Because it's spotless, our toilet.
01:52I'll just stroll in while my partner's on the lavvy. Shall I say shift over, love? Those
01:56plates aren't going to wash themselves. I've got a bag of King Edward's to scrub you in
02:00while you're there. Give the flesh a pull, this chicken needs a rinse. Stop giving me
02:05meaningless facts comparing arbitrary things. 87% of us are less likely to be interested
02:10in them than we are to be attacked by Trevor McDonald in our beds. On with the show.
02:17In a world full of bologna, we need someone with credibility to help us find the answers
02:23to our questions. So as always, we begin by asking, who is tonight's authenticator? Whoever
02:29it is will need all the charm he employed as Casanova, all the passion of Hamlet holding
02:33the skull of Yorick, all the charisma that drives the ladies wild. He'll need to be as
02:38brave as when he faces the universe's disgusting monsters. Who is tonight's authenticator?
02:48It's David Tennant!
03:01Hello! Hello!
03:04Hello, David. Hi, good evening, hello. That was a wonderful morphing you did for us there.
03:08Thank you very much. It's just one of the skills that I give you for free this evening.
03:12Thank you for joining us tonight. It's a great pleasure to be here. How are you going to
03:15help us tonight? Well, I will be providing you and this beautiful panel in front of me
03:20with lots of juicy bits of information which will help us stagger towards the truth of
03:25the questions being answered this evening. Perfect. And when I think we have an answer,
03:28I will do this.
03:37Hello, Rita. Hello. Thanks for joining us. Pleasure. What have you been asked this week?
03:42Could I please refrain from sticking chewing gum under the bar of the Queen Vic?
03:51Because you know when you're going for a take, it's always so quick, so I've always got gum
03:56and I don't mean to, but I stick it under the bar. So anyway, we've now got a ball that
04:01we've kind of collected.
04:06I'm disappointed that you're sticking chewing gum around the... Do you know what I mean?
04:11Yahoo versus EastEnders. Adam, what have you learnt this week? I've learnt that Australia
04:17has a saint, Saint Mary of the Cross, and what was amazing about it was Australians
04:23turned up at the Vatican and acted like Australians at a sporting event. They're in green and
04:29gold, they were waving flags, and I kid you not, they chanted, Mary, Mary, Mary, oi, oi, oi.
04:38So let's find out who wants to know what tonight.
04:43It's Will.i.am from the Black Eyed Peas. Will.i.am says, Rod, I want to know what you're going
04:49to do with all that junk. All that junk inside your trunk. Look, Will.i.am, will you get
04:56off my case about that flipping trunk? I have told you a hundred times I'm going to take
05:00it down the tip, but I haven't had a chance, all right?
05:03Oh, the Chilean miners. Have you been following the Chilean miners' story? David, have you
05:07been following them? Sure, how could you miss it, yeah. Are you a fan of them? Oh, I love
05:11the president, who had his teeth whitened over them clearly before they all got out.
05:15I'm not sure whether he's had his teeth whitened or just whether his teeth are cleaner than
05:18the rest of them coming up. Whatever happened to the guy whose wife met his mistress at
05:24the top of the mountain? I don't know what did happen, because what actually happened?
05:29His wife didn't show up to meet him at the top, but his mistress did. Yeah, but how did
05:35it emerge? Because they went to... They were at the scene of the mine. At the scene of
05:40the mine? They're at the top of the mine. At the scene of the mine? And the wife was
05:55crying over a photograph and kissing it and whatever, and then another woman sidled up
06:00next to her. Yeah, with the same photograph, and she was like, how do you know him? Has
06:09he now gone off with the mistress? Yeah, because the wife didn't show up. Technically, she
06:15laughed at him. Who's next? Hayden Panettiere. Nicely pronounced. Thank you very much. Let's
06:34see what Hayden Panettiere wants to know. Hi, Rod. I just wrapped on my new film, and
06:40I spent so much time working, it got me wondering, who do we spend more time with, our boss or
06:47our partner? Who do we spend more time with, our boss or our partners? David, can you see
06:52what you can find out for us? Who do you spend more time with, boss or partner, Rita? I don't
06:56spend any time with my boss. Do you? Because we're on the main floor at EastEnders, and
07:02all the big offices are upstairs. It's now got to the point where we don't even bother
07:05saying their names. We just go, it's them upstairs, them upstairs. You don't spend any
07:09time with them, and I don't spend any time with my partner either, so... Who do we spend
07:14more time with, our boss or our partner? Well, I'm self-employed, so I am my own boss, so
07:21I spend all of my time with my boss, and let me tell you, the sexual harassment is horrendous.
07:27David, have you got anything for us, any facts, information that can help us? Well, on frustrations
07:33with workplace technology, I've got a little film to show you here.
07:57LAUGHTER
08:06LAUGHTER
08:10LAUGHTER
08:21Have you ever lost it, Lloyd? Have you ever lost it with technology? Yeah, cling film.
08:28I'm not sure that counts as technology, Lloyd. I think in Wales, that very much counts as
08:33technology. It's contrary, isn't it? Like, you rip off a bit about this big, and then
08:41you turn your back on it for a second... Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Nobody else in the
08:48world rips off cling film and then turns their back on it for a second. No, no, using cling
08:56film is a very straightforward procedure. Tear, tear, use, not tear.
09:03It sort of folds in on itself, so I've ripped up a bit about this big, right, so I've ripped it out,
09:08then I go to get the thing I'm going to wrap. Why didn't you get the thing you were going to wrap
09:12in the first place? Well, because I haven't thought through, have I? I'm working on the hoof.
09:18Why are you wrapping presents in cling film? People will guess what they are straight away.
09:25It's not a present, it's like a pack of bacon or something. As a present? So there we are, you've
09:30got your pack of bacon, you rip the cling film, you turn your back for a second... And presumably
09:34the cling film goes, watch this. That's exactly right.
09:45Let's have a look, have we got any more facts, Lloyd? Yeah, of course we do. An estimated
09:49eight million singles in the UK are looking for love, and last year it was projected they
09:53would go on 18 million first dates, and that at least six million of those dates would
09:58end in disaster. Tell us what disaster is, I mean disaster, that's quite a broad church.
10:05Well, what would you count as a disaster? Well, it's difficult to know, I mean is that anything
10:08from not calling back to... No, I don't think not calling back would be a disaster, not
10:12calling back would be unfortunate, I don't think it would be a disaster. Have you got
10:15any disastrous first dates? Lloyd, have you? I've got one. I went on a first date with
10:20someone, and I thought I would do a little magic trick. Is that a euphemism? No, it wasn't
10:28a euphemism, it was actually... Look, I only know one magic trick, and it's this, if you
10:33put a staple in a piece of paper, right, you empty out the stapler, and then you cover
10:38up the staple with your finger, so it looks like you've just got a normal piece of paper
10:41and a stapler, and then the magic trick is you put that up there, put the stapler up
10:45and go... And because it's, if it's a post-it note, it'll stick to your forehead, there's
10:51a staple in it, and ha ha, it looks like you've stapled yourself in the forehead. Hands up
10:55who thinks they might see where this is going. So, I put a staple in the top of the piece
11:03of paper, covered it up with my finger, and she came out, went ready, and went, oh, watch
11:06this, I've got a trick for you. I forgot to empty out the staple. And just went like this
11:12and went, boom! And then looked at her with a smile, and ha ha ha ha. She just looked
11:17at me and, like, she honestly just went... So I pulled it off, but the staple stayed
11:24in. We had to go to her kitchen and get a full... wedge it out. And then I spent the
11:34whole date with two red dots in the middle of my forehead. I would argue that trying
11:40to trick someone into thinking you've stapled your own head is a strange thing to do on
11:44a date. I mean, why not just get a sandwich toaster out and go, watch this! David, are
11:53we any closer to finding an answer? The average UK working week is 40.6 hours, excluding sleep.
12:00Couples working these hours only spend around two hours a day with their partner, and the
12:04rest of their other time alone or with other people. So on average, we spend almost three
12:09times as much time with our boss than our partner. But then that excludes sleep. Including
12:14sleep? I can't do the maths. What was it again? Give it to me, I'll do it. The average UK
12:22working week is 40.6 hours. You got that? Yeah. Excluding sleep. Couples working these
12:25hours only spend around two hours a day with their partner, and the rest of their other
12:28time alone or... So that's 14 hours a week. Or with their... It's 30 hours more with a
12:33partner per week than it is with a boss. So, Hayden Panettiere, you asked whether we spend
12:47more time with our boss or our partner, and the answer is our partner, if you include
12:51sleep. Of course, some of you will be thinking, what about people who have no boss and no
12:55partner? People who spend all their time on their own. You haven't taken into account
12:58the losers, the lost, the lonely, the desperately unemployable, and those destined to be single
13:02all their lives. Well, if you are watching this on Dave, I can only apologise.
13:12Let's see who's next. Polar bear. Hello, Rod, I'm a polar bear. Floating around on a lump
13:21of ice six foot by four foot. How can I stop you humans from causing climate change? Well,
13:27listen, polar bears, you were happy enough to take the cash when the advertisers came
13:31knocking, weren't you? Have you seen how many lorries Coke has on the road? Did you not
13:35think of the emissions and how that might impact on your environment? And if you don't
13:38see the irony in you floating around on something the size of a glass of mint, you might want
13:42to take your shades off. Let's have a look who else we've got. We've got Tinchy Strider,
13:48ladies and gentlemen. I thought a Tinchy Strider was a type of child's posture. I thought Tinchy
13:55Strider went up the water spout.
14:07Who's next? Tristan Gameloff, casualty luck. Let's see what Tristan wants to know, shall we?
14:14Hi, Rod. Working on casualty, we get to know quite a bit about medical science, but every
14:19now and then a question comes along that we just can't answer, so that's where I need
14:22your help. We were wondering, is it possible to knock yourself out with a punch from your
14:28own fist? Excellent question. It is an excellent question. David, can you have a look and see
14:34what you can find out for us? But the rest of you, what do we think? Is it possible?
14:37Have you ever knocked yourself out? No, but my dad did. My dad's favourite story is when
14:43he used to play rugby when he was younger, and every scrum they went into, the other
14:48team won, and so his coach took him aside during the break and went, you need to knock
14:53out the hooker in the opposition. Next time you punch, knock him out, because we can't
14:59win with him. So they packed down for a scrum, and my dad said he just packed in and went,
15:03I can't believe I'm going to do that, and he just went as hard as he could and went,
15:06oh, I think I just killed the guy. It was the hardest punch he's ever thrown, and the
15:10scrum broke up, and my dad's own hooker was unconscious. And I always loved the idea of
15:18my dad walking away from the scrum going, oh, who did that? That's awful. My dad said
15:25to me, when I was being bullied by a kid at school, he decided to give me some tough love,
15:31and he pulled me into the front room and went, you listen to me, right? I'm sick of you coming
15:34home and whinging about that boy. You punch him once, all you have to do is turn around
15:38when he bullies you next. You punch him once, and he'll never bother you again. That's my
15:41pledge to you as a father. So I did exactly what he said. I turned around when this kid
15:46was picking on me, and I punched him. He beat the shit out of me. It is the worst piece
15:52of advice I've ever been given in my life. Over to David for a fact. Well, martial arts
15:58are often about punching people, but the hits, they're all about skill. Martial arts are
16:02often about punching people. The ancient discipline of the martial arts. It all comes
16:07down to who can punch the other person. It's all about skill and control. Here's an audition
16:11tape from a martial arts movie.
16:33Any final auditions over this side, David? You ever had any terrible auditions, disasters?
16:51Oh, they're all pretty awful, to be honest. What was your Doctor Who one like? Do you
16:56I didn't really have an audition for that. You know. Why not? You were sleeping with
17:04canine. Do you know what I've always wondered? Do you think a man, like a boxer, I mean,
17:12somebody trained in boxing, could knock out a hippo? I've always wondered that. Rita,
17:19do you think a man like Mike Tyson or somebody, a really big boxer, could knock out a hippo
17:23with a punch? Maybe a baby hippo. That's too nice an image. I'm talking about a full-on
17:29big old dirty hippo. No, I don't reckon he could. Do you reckon a man could knock out
17:36a hippo? Yeah, but not, you'd have to take it by surprise, I think. Yeah, if the hippo
17:43wasn't looking. Do you know, like some people, if they know a punch is coming, you can flinch
17:48and you can take it. Ah, yeah, yeah. You'd think the hippo would brace. I reckon if you
17:53did this to the hippo, if you went, oh, look at that lion. Bang! That's how you'd do it
17:58then. I reckon Greg could knock himself out in all seriousness. If anyone could, sure,
18:03because you're a 20 stone, 6 foot 8. I've never punched anyone in the face in my life.
18:07Well, why don't we make this a first? Why don't you try and knock yourself out now as
18:09an experiment? Oh, that'd be good, yeah. Punch myself in the face on national television.
18:13Go on, punch yourself in the face to see if you can knock yourself out for the experiment.
18:17I don't want to punch myself in the face, I have to surprise myself. You have to put
18:20some butter on a door handle so I go like that. Look, if you put this on, I've got an
18:28eye mask for you, if you put an eye mask on, Greg, so that you can surprise yourself with
18:32a punch. You think by covering my eyes up I'm more likely to punch myself in the face?
18:36Yeah, you won't see the punch coming, you might knock yourself out. You can creep up
18:39on yourself now. I think he should put his fists like that. Unfortunately, he can't see
18:47this. You might have to explain, love. Lift your mask up, Greg. Lift your mask up. Lift
18:55your mask up, Greg, we're not ready. This is what you should do, right? You should do
18:58that and then just throw your face into it. That's it, just pretend there's a mullet
19:06going on. Pretend there's a bit of a rumble and then just stick your head in there. I'll
19:11tell you what I'm going to do, I'm going to put my mask on and I'm going to just pretend
19:15that this whole thing isn't going on. Now get your arms going. Come on, get your arms
19:21going. What? I'm not going to punch myself in the face. Get your arms going and then
19:25stick your head in the middle of it. Come on, get on with it. What's my motivation for
19:29punching myself in the face? Well. Oh, he's still conscious. I would love to tell you,
19:44Rita, that that wasn't erotic, but I'm afraid it was. Oh, I tell you, that stings, Rita.
19:54I felt like I'm being in a scene in EastEnders. Oh, that's it, you slag. David, are we any
20:01closer to finding an answer? I suspect we might need to bring an expert on this. So
20:05on the line, Dr Anthony Alessi from Connecticut, who was voted Ringside Physician of the Year
20:11in 2009. Yes, he was. Dr Alessi, are you there? Yes, I'm here. The question we are pondering
20:18here in the studio is could a man, or anyone, could one knock oneself out with one's own
20:24fist? They could not do it intentionally. You couldn't do it intentionally? No, I don't
20:31believe anyone can do that intentionally, because we have a reflex built into the brain
20:37stem that causes us to, for avoidance. Now certainly someone could be surprised if they
20:43were doing something like closing a valve that was stiff and their hand slipped, and
20:48they were surprised and hit themselves, it's possible to cause a concussion. So it's the
20:53element of surprise that's the problem? Absolutely. Can I ask a question at this point? If you
20:58surprised a hippo, if surprise is the key, if you surprised a hippopotamus, do you think
21:06a man could knock it out? Only Mike Tyson. But just to clarify, you think it's theoretically
21:18possible, but you don't know anyone that's ever done it? I think it's so highly improbable
21:25that it could not happen. I will take that as an answer, thank you very much for joining
21:28us.
21:37Well, that's nearly all the questions we've had sent in this week, but Rita, you're our
21:41special guest, do you have a question for us this evening? Yes. What is more important
21:49to the planet, birds or fish? What do you reckon it is? Birds, but I have no idea why.
21:56I bet there's some explanation that you're going to find. All right, David, can you see
22:00what you can find out? Are you a bird man or a fish man, David? I'd always go for the
22:05chicken or the fish. What do you reckon is more important, fish or birds? Birds, rather.
22:13I think birds as well, what do you think, Adam? Let me just go along that line first.
22:19Lloyd, what do you think, birds or fish? Fish, definitely. Adam? Fish. Fish are more important.
22:24I'd miss them both. I'd hate to wake up in the morning and not hear birds tweeting, but
22:28then I'd hate to wake up at all if I couldn't have fish fingers. I think if you woke up
22:33to the sounds of fish song, that wouldn't be as appealing, would it? Have you got any
22:39other facts for us? There's a clip here where the fish and the birds try to settle the question
22:43for us.
22:52But they push the herring within range of the gulls.
22:59It's a feeding frenzy.
23:13That is pretty cool, that. That technically wasn't a fish, it was a mammal.
23:25There are loads of examples of why birds are really important in terms of keeping down
23:31insects and mice and stuff. Like farmers, if you didn't have, like without the cockerel,
23:37farmers wouldn't get up, and then... It's absolutely true, without the farmer, obviously...
23:45Without a cockerel, a farmer would go into a lifetime coma. That's it. Cockerel hasn't
23:51gone off, I'm going to stay asleep for 60 years. Without the farmer, there is no food
23:55chain, there's no industry, you've got to look at the knock-on effect of this. You take
23:58the cockerel out, the whole of our food chain collapses. I've said this before, I know,
24:03but the trouble with this is, you genuinely believe it. I think there's an element of
24:07truth in it. There's an element of truth. That a cockerel is nature's alarm clock. Without
24:13it, farmers would sleep for a lifetime, there would be no milk produced, the economy would
24:18collapse, everyone would die without a cockerel. Yeah, that's it. There's a misconception
24:25that roosters just crow when the sun comes up, cockerels crow whenever they feel like
24:28it. Absolutely, they crow, they know, because they've got an internal body clock. Whenever
24:33they feel like it. They don't just crow whenever they feel like it, they've got discipline.
24:39What happened there was, David said that they crow whenever they feel like it, and you interpreted
24:45that sentence as being, in order to wake up farmers. Everybody knows that cockerels crow
24:50to wake people up, they don't just crow when they feel like it. Again, there's a misconception
24:55that roosters just crow when the sun comes up, cockerels crow whenever they feel like
24:58it. They clearly don't crow whenever they feel like it, do they? I've got the computer,
25:03I'm right. Alright. They have to crow at dawn, it's nothing to do with whether they feel
25:08like it. Cockerels crow whenever they feel like it. I think you're noticing more at dawn
25:15because it's quiet and you're in bed asleep. No, that's not true, cockerels don't crow
25:19at three o'clock in the afternoon. Yes, they do. No, they don't. What? I'll refer you back
25:25to exhibit A. Cockerels crow whenever they feel like it. No, they don't. They only crow
25:35at dawn, it doesn't matter where, they crow at dawn. That's it, they know what time it
25:39is. If it says it on the screen, it's true. Cockerels crow whenever they feel like it,
25:43that's it. Do you, David Tennant, believe that cockerels crow when they feel like it?
25:46Cockerels crow whenever they feel like it, that's all I know. Do you believe that? Don't
25:50push me. Do you believe that? Don't push me. Do you believe that? Don't push me. Do you
25:53believe that? I know, they feel like crowing. Do you believe that? Yes, they only crow in
25:57the morning, I give in. Do you believe that? It's all true, whatever you say, I give in.
26:06I'm closing the computer, it's over. So we've had it authenticated. Thank you, David. Authenticating
26:28the fact, my, so birds, I, see this is why, all good reasons why I think birds are more
26:32important. Yeah. And where would we be without owls? Just tell me, please back me up, that
26:43without birds you would have so many vermin and insects and everything would be overrun,
26:47our food chain would be destroyed. Just tell me what you want me to say. Just find me a
26:53fact about birds being important to the environment because of vermin and... Fish are used in the
26:57production of a lot of lipsticks, but now birds have got their claws into the beauty
27:01market too. The Geisha Facial, available in a New York beauty salon for $180, contains
27:07powdered nightingale droppings. The powder is rich in the amino acid guanine, which is
27:13said to brighten and cleanse skin. Is that something you'd go for, Rita? If it worked,
27:18yes. Would you? It was good, yeah. Really? Yeah. You'd have bird poo on your face. Yeah.
27:24Would you really? Yeah. Have you ever used anything weird like that? I probably have
27:28used loads of things weird like that. There's all sorts of stuff in make-up, who knows?
27:32Looks good, put it on. There's a fish pedicure thing that I... Have you seen that? I've had
27:37it done. Have you? But not in a shop. I was on holiday in Mexico with my wife and there
27:42are these pools where you put your feet in and the fish come up and they nibble at all
27:46the bits of dead skin. And we just sat there with our feet in the pool and these little
27:50fish and then bigger fish would come up and they'd start nibbling at your feet. It's like
27:53a really low budget version of Jaws. Now, but Adam, I mean, you'll know why I'm sort
28:00of looking at you quizzically because I know certain things about you that not everybody
28:04else might know. Okay, I have an artificial right foot, so I've got a... So you had a
28:09fish pedicure and a rubber foot. I want to know, did they give you 50% discount? The
28:19funny thing, what I actually took, I took my foot off and left it aside. Of course you
28:23did. Of course. I love it when you say things like that. I had my left foot in and I had
28:26the stump hanging in and there were other tourists that turned up. Have you ever heard
28:39of bird and fish make-up, Grant? Have you ever used it? Have you ever tried it? Have
28:42you got your own range? Not only have I heard of it, Rod, I've been giving this some thought
28:45and I have created my own bird and fish make-up range. Have you? Yeah. What is it? It's just
28:56a way of using birds and fish to transform someone. Do you reckon you could make Lloyd
29:04into a... Do you know what, I think I could. Come on, Lloyd. Ready for his fish bird make-over,
29:18please welcome Lloyd! First I'll take from the bird kingdom a lovely beak, I thought.
29:34A lovely beak for Lloyd. That's it. That's an interesting new look, isn't it? Tell you
29:42what, it's like it's been made for him. I suppose I should counteract that with something
29:46from the kingdom of the sea. Perhaps a lovely lobster. Can you do some kind of crab spore
29:56him? I've got a couple of crabs here. Talking of crabs, have a look at this baby here. Where's
30:05his bonnet? Look at that lovely little crab bonnet. That looks nice, doesn't it? Tell
30:12you what, you do scrub up well, Lloyd. Just a little. Nice, isn't it, Lloyd? Ria, can
30:35you come and do Lloyd's body when Greg does exposed areas? Lloyd, I know you feel stupid
30:41right now, but just remember this, although you might feel like a bit of an idiot, you
30:44actually look like Lady Gaga. Really nice and back, Lloyd, look at that. Oh, hold on
30:55here. Keep it going. Build it up. Peter, watch his tail. To be honest with you, I think my
31:04look's almost complete. He's starting to look like a Doctor Who monster, if you don't mind
31:08me saying so. Except he looks a little bit angrier than a Doctor Who monster. He's half
31:13bird, half fish. He's the evil bursh. Ladies and gentlemen, the evil bursh. I think we
31:25need something to go head to head with the evil bursh, Mr Tennant. What would my weapons
31:30be? I would have thought, David, with your background, you would already know that. Well,
31:34I know. Obviously, I know. Everybody knows that the evil bursh can only be fought using
31:39a good old-fashioned arm wrestle. I am ready. Go to it, my boy. Ladies and gentlemen, David
31:44Tennant takes on the evil bursh. No touching the crab cod paste, Tennant. Get in here,
32:04get in his face, Tennant. Get in his face. Hey, hey. Oh, the crab. Take your official
32:09position, gentlemen, please. And no touching his crab's borin. Let's get the evil bursh's
32:15magnificent headpiece on. Ladies and gentlemen, are you ready for the evil bursh versus David
32:22Tennant? David Tennant, ready? Ready? Evil bursh, ready? I'm not evil, I'm just misunderstood.
32:35Come on, bursh. Three, two, one.
33:06Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for the evil bursh. David Tennant, ladies and gentlemen,
33:16the defeated. Have you got any final thoughts for us this evening? If anyone still cares,
33:25Professor Steve Redpath at Aberdeen University says that between fish and birds, it's fish.
33:32No! If you could take birds out of the world, our ecosystems would continue to function.
33:37But if you were to remove the fish from our seas, then the marine ecosystem would collapse.
33:42Fish are more important to this planet.
33:53Well, that's pretty much it for tonight. So, people of Britain, if you've got a question,
33:57you can tweet the show. But for tonight, it is thanks to Rita Simon, Adam Hill, Greg Davies,
34:07my flatmate, the evil bursh, and of course, the authenticator, David Tennant. Tune in
34:17next week when we'll be asking more questions. I'm Rod Gilbert, and you can ask me literally
34:22anything. Good night.
34:28There's more chat and banter from Rod Gilbert's radio show. Download his best bits on the BBC Radio Wales website.
34:38And the Welsh songbird, Charlotte Church, is up next on BBC One, enjoying the crack with Graham Norton.