Mike & Angelo - Mr Perfect (1993)

  • 3 months ago
An episode from the Kids TV series Mike & Angelo (S5, Ep 9), broadcast on March 4th 1993. In this episode, all is going well in Mike's relationship with Melanie - that is, until his pal Jeff comes to visit and sweeps her off her feet. Determined to challenge him, he is less confidant when he realizes Jeff is a judo champion! Meanwhile, Rita becomes a genius on the flute after one of Angelo's inventions.

Starring Shelley Thompson, Tim Whitnell, Michael Benz, Alexandra Milman and Nick Zwicky, this was originally uploaded by VideotapeFTW from one of his video recordings, so all credit goes to him for this upload. His video on Youtube can be found here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7duozqfo8Es&list=PLP22qIfK2ZNSjhorSj8b2qWg7iR8q3erG&index=9.
Transcript
00:00
00:30Oh, it's so frustrating.
00:35I want to be able to play this thing so badly.
00:38Oh, well, in that, you're succeeding magnificently.
00:41Thank you.
00:43Here, you have a blow.
00:45Oh.
00:46Ah!
00:47Ah!
00:48Ah!
00:49Ah!
00:50Ah!
00:51Ah!
00:52Ah!
00:53Ah!
00:54Ah!
00:55Ah!
00:56Ah!
00:57Ah!
00:58Ah!
00:59Ah!
01:00Oh!
01:01Oh!
01:02Yeah, go on, get yourself some poison darts,
01:04and put me out of my misery.
01:05Oh, come on, Rita, you give in too easily.
01:08You know what they say,
01:09if at first you don't succeed, plug yourself in to the Anglo
01:12patent-pending, skill-dispensing, instant-learning, crammer-jammer.
01:16The...
01:18Here, Rita, bang this on.
01:20Oh, wait a minute.
01:21Now let me phone ahead and book myself an ambulance.
01:23What is this thing?
01:25Simplicity itself.
01:27You can go from being a mere beginner to being the world's greatest
01:30without having to worry about that long, boring bit in the middle.
01:33Hey!
01:35Want to be an airline pilot, a chess master, a gourmet chef?
01:39Well, now you can, with this.
01:42Uh, any chance of a last request?
01:45Oh, absolutely. Certainly. Sure. What is it?
01:48Stop talking. Just get on with it before I change my mind.
01:52Flute player.
01:54Da-da-da, da-da-da, da-da-da, da-da-da...
01:57Ahem.
02:04What's happening?
02:15What?
02:17Oh!
02:20Oh, no.
02:22Oh, stupid keyboard.
02:24For Jupiter... Oh, you type L and you get J.
02:27You type J and you get L, I suppose.
02:30This thing is a jousy piece of lunk.
02:33A lousy piece of junk.
02:50Ha-ha!
02:51Now we're getting there.
02:55This is the quick way?
02:56It'll be twice as quick doing it the long way.
02:58Ready?
03:09Rita, are you all right?
03:11Oh, having your brain connected to the National Grid is all right.
03:15I'm terrific.
03:16Music, maestro.
03:18Please.
03:40Oh! Bravo!
03:42Wow! More, more!
03:44Rita, that was brilliant!
03:46Damn!
03:47I had no idea you could play like that.
03:49Me neither. I'm just a natural musical genius, I guess.
03:53Oh, ahem.
03:54Ahem. And a lying hound.
03:58Time to warm up. Look.
04:01Uh-oh, that'll be Uncle Cyril.
04:03Let's go. See you after lunch.
04:05See you, Mel. Bye.
04:06Another brilliant Angelo invention.
04:08OK, Professor Patent Pending.
04:11What's this?
04:12Come on, keep your wig on.
04:16Oh, sorry.
04:18Hey, Mikey home?
04:19Uh, yeah.
04:21Mike?
04:23Lewis's sister?
04:24Uh, no.
04:26No.
04:29Mike, there's somebody to see you.
04:32Jeff, hey.
04:33Yo!
04:34Come on in, buddy. Jeff, this is Mel.
04:36Hey again. Hi.
04:38So, you want to come on down to the ice rink?
04:40Yeah, sure. Hang on, I'll just go get changed.
04:44Oh, hi there.
04:45So, you must be Mikey's sister.
04:47Ha-ha, no.
04:49I'm his aunt.
04:50Oh, yeah, right.
04:52Jeff Camiso.
04:54The Jeff Camiso.
04:56Jeff Black Belt Camiso.
04:57Oh, wow! Mike's told me all about you.
05:00Jeff's a junior judo champ.
05:02Aren't you, Jeff?
05:04And you are?
05:05Thrilled to meet you.
05:07What a guy this Jeff Camiso is.
05:09Oh, thank you, Jeff.
05:11This Jeff Camiso is...
05:13Oh, how you doing, Jeffo?
05:16Mike's new pal.
05:17Oh, well, can I get you guys anything?
05:19Yeah, you can give me my hand back.
05:20Angelo, heel!
05:22Go.
05:25I am sorry about that.
05:28Uh, come on through and wait for Mike in the sitting room.
05:32Cool.
05:35Great. Well, take a seat.
05:37Mike won't be a minute.
05:38Is that right?
05:39What he said about you doing judo?
05:40Sure. I was a brown belt at 10.
05:43At 10.30, I was a black belt.
05:45Amazing.
05:46Yeah, guess it is.
05:48Won a whole bunch of medals.
05:49I'd love to see them sometime.
05:56Wow.
05:58You must be really good.
06:00Yeah, that's what they all tell me.
06:02I've been all over with the National Youth Squad.
06:04Got some photographs.
06:06Got some photographs?
06:08You want to see?
06:09Oh, yeah.
06:13That's me in Tokyo,
06:14Sri Lanka, Thailand,
06:17Australia, China.
06:20And that's me with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
06:21Comes through a lot of our gigs.
06:23He's cool.
06:24Don't you ever get hurt?
06:26Nah, not if you know what you're doing.
06:28And I know what I'm doing.
06:29Let me show you.
06:33Okay, just relax.
06:35I got you.
06:36Ah!
06:43What's going on?
06:44Melanie!
06:45Oh, nothing.
06:46This is nothing? I'd hate to see something.
06:49Mike, Jeff was just...
06:51Yeah, I saw what Jeff was just...
06:52What is that supposed to mean?
06:54Hey, buddy, what's eating you?
06:55Don't buddy me, pal.
06:56You think I can't see what's going on here?
06:58What's going on?
06:59Nothing is going on.
07:01Jeff was just demonstrating a judo throw.
07:03Oh, is that what they call it nowadays, is it?
07:05You got a problem with that, kiddo?
07:07Grow up, huh?
07:08Come on, let's go melt some ice. You coming, Mel?
07:10No, she isn't. She doesn't like ice skating.
07:13Do you?
07:14Yes, I do.
07:16I'd love to come.
07:17Excellent.
07:20But...
07:21But...
07:23But you didn't ask your uncle.
07:24He won't let you.
07:25Hey, you wimp, give the girl a break, will you?
07:27Don't you want her to come or what?
07:30Sure, I do.
07:31Okay, so what are we waiting for?
07:35Let's go.
07:46Lagager?
07:49What's lagager?
07:50Angelo!
07:53Oh, come on.
07:57Oh, sorry.
07:58There it is.
08:03Hey!
08:07Look at me, I'm juggling!
08:17I can't believe it.
08:21I've always wanted to do this.
08:24Boy, am I good or what?
08:26Absolutely, Rita.
08:27Come dinner time, you can toss the salad.
08:28You look as if your best friend just told you to go sit on a hot waffle iron.
08:33Oh, I'm sorry. It's Mike.
08:35Mike? What's wrong with Mike?
08:37He just told me to go sit on a hot waffle iron.
08:40It's not like him.
08:42No, I know. Something's up. He's in the foulest mood.
08:45I'm really worried about him.
08:47Where is he?
08:49He's in his room.
08:50I'll go talk to him.
08:53Mike?
08:54I'm busy.
08:56Are you all right?
08:57I'm fine.
08:59Did you have a good time?
09:00Great.
09:02What are you doing in there?
09:04Nothing.
09:09Why are you doing sit-ups, Mike?
09:14Who wants to know?
09:16I do.
09:18Mike?
09:21Who wants to know the KGB?
09:23Hey, whoa!
09:25I was exercising.
09:26That's all? Do you have a problem with that?
09:28Hey, turn down the gas.
09:31What's happened?
09:33Something's happened.
09:35Nothing's happened.
09:37Is it anything to do with Jeff?
09:39I don't want to talk about it.
09:49You're feeling left out, right?
09:51No!
09:53How could you tell?
09:56Oh, just a stab in the dark.
09:59I'd like to stab him in the dark.
10:02Listen.
10:04Look, there's no point in being jealous.
10:07Jealous?
10:09Who's jealous?
10:10I'm not jealous.
10:12Just because Melanie's drooling over Mr. Big Shot Muscle Boy...
10:17Oh, I get it.
10:20Hence the exercises.
10:22You think you have to compete with Jeff.
10:24Can you blame me?
10:26At the ice rink, he was phenomenal.
10:28Everyone stopped to watch.
10:30At one point, he swept Melanie off her feet
10:32and spun her around his head.
10:34And where were you all this time?
10:36In the snack bar.
10:38My 10 pence got stuck in the hot chocolate machine.
10:42Look, don't get too obsessed about it.
10:47If Melanie likes you, she likes you just the way you are.
10:51Yeah.
10:53Trouble is, she likes Jeff the way he is even better.
10:58I have to get fit.
11:01It's the only way.
11:05Well, if that's what you think, that's what you think.
11:09But I think you're wrong.
11:11I'll show him.
11:14I'll show him who's a wimp.
11:17Well, look at you.
11:44Is Mikey ready?
11:46Uh, well, he's not back yet.
11:48Back? From where?
11:50Um, you better come in.
11:52We're supposed to be going to the pictures.
11:54Where's Lucy?
11:56Um...
11:57Ow!
11:58I'm here. I was just going out for a jog.
12:00You look terrible. Are you all right?
12:02Of course I'm all right. If it isn't Lee.
12:04That's me.
12:06Why don't you come and sit down, Mel?
12:10You got it with you?
12:16Oh.
12:18So, what movie are you going to see?
12:20We haven't decided yet.
12:22Any ideas?
12:23Yeah, let's stay in and watch a video.
12:26Oh, Mike, I'm really...
12:27Oh, well, maybe he's a little tired.
12:30Tired? Who's tired?
12:32I'm not tired.
12:33It's just I take this great film that was on last night
12:35and I figured if we could watch it,
12:36it's nothing to do with being tired.
12:38Do I look tired?
12:44No.
13:01Oh, this is a real fun evening, I must say.
13:04Mike!
13:08Right, that's it.
13:10Thanks.
13:19Hey, Mellie.
13:20Jeff.
13:21Hey, I was just wondering if you guys
13:22wanted to do something tonight.
13:24Dream on.
13:25Because that's what Michael's doing.
13:26He's asleep.
13:28Shit, this hour?
13:30Say, you busy?
13:32Well, we were supposed to be going to the pictures.
13:34Cool, let's go.
13:38Forget BB Herman, you got me.
13:41Why not?
13:47Oh, dear.
13:53Wake up, Mike!
13:56Mike!
13:57You've got to wake up!
13:59Oh, go away.
14:01I just want to be alone, please.
14:03Go away.
14:06Go away.
14:23Sheesh, still dropped off.
14:26How long was I sleeping?
14:27Oh, not long.
14:29How long's not long?
14:31Three hours.
14:32Three hours?
14:36Where's Mel?
14:37Um...
14:38Mel!
14:40You'll have to shout a bit louder than that.
14:43Where is she?
14:44At the cinema.
14:46Go out to the cinema?
14:47Yes.
14:48Without me?
14:49Yes.
14:51She went alone?
14:52Yo, Ness.
14:54Um, look, you'd better sit down, Mike.
14:57I am sitting down.
14:58Well, then maybe you'd better lie down, then.
15:00I've been lying down for three hours.
15:04Oh, my gosh.
15:06No.
15:07Tell me it's not true.
15:08It is true.
15:10Mel went to the cinema with...
15:12Jeff!
15:13What?
15:14Why did you wake me?
15:15You told me to go away!
15:17Or maybe I'm still asleep.
15:18This is a nightmare, right?
15:19Melanie and Jeff.
15:20I can't believe this.
15:22What are you going to do?
15:23First, I'm going to scream.
15:25Ah!
15:26Then I'm going to hit him.
15:27Hard.
15:28No, no, no, Mike.
15:29Mike, you can't do that.
15:30He's a judo expert.
15:31He'll mash you to a pulp.
15:32Oh.
15:33Oh, come on, it's not that bad.
15:35So your girlfriend's gone off on a date
15:37with a guy who's cool, dark, handsome.
15:40Angel, I'd like to be alone, please.
15:43Can I be alone?
15:45Can I stay with you?
15:46No!
15:47Oh.
15:54Mike wants to be alone, Rita.
15:56Oh.
15:57I'd better go see if he's all right.
15:59No, no, Mike wants to be alone, Rita.
16:01Oh.
16:07No.
16:09Hey, Gizmo, do your stuff.
16:16Whoa!
16:17Ah!
16:18Ah!
16:19Ah!
16:26OK, monster mouth.
16:29I'm ready for you.
16:32Some friend you turned out to be.
16:34What is it, munchkin?
16:35Can't you see I'm escorting the lady home?
16:37You're a big rat.
16:38Don't do that.
16:39OK, take it, eh?
16:40Eh? Eh?
16:41Gizmo, stop it!
16:42I'm giving you a friendly warning.
16:43Here, touch me one more time, you're dog meat.
16:45To me like this?
16:46Mike, don't!
16:47You're dead, my friend.
16:48What was that?
16:49A challenge?
16:50I accept.
16:51What do you think you're doing?
16:52I'm a black belt, remember?
16:53Yeah, well, I'm an expert myself, as you'll soon find out.
16:56I never knew that.
16:57Yeah.
16:58Well, a lot of books say that.
17:00Well, a lot of books shoot in my mouth.
17:02I'll quit that creep show.
17:03That's it.
17:04No!
17:05You asked for this.
17:09What the heck is he doing?
17:11What are you doing, Mike?
17:14I don't know.
17:15I wish I did, but I don't.
17:17Why are you playing Ludo?
17:20Ludo?
17:22Ludo expert?
17:26Uh-oh.
17:28So, you're a Ludo expert.
17:32Uh-huh.
17:33But not a Judo expert.
17:36Uh-huh.
17:39What a pity.
17:49What on earth?
17:50Michael!
17:51Mike, are you all right?
17:53I guess.
17:54That's what happens when you mess with Jeff the Missile.
17:58Come on, let's go.
17:59You must be joking.
18:01After what you just did?
18:03After just spending the most tedious, boring, and monotonous evening of my whole life
18:08listening to you bragging and showing off as if you're something special?
18:11Well, let me tell you, Mr. Big Shot,
18:13the most athletic thing about you is your mouth.
18:16You're a creep, you're a wally,
18:18and you're about to get a door slammed in your face.
18:21Yay!
18:23And as for you, Michael Mason,
18:25you really are a very insecure and jealous person.
18:28I know.
18:29I never know what you're going to do next.
18:31That's true.
18:32You throw yourself in the deep end without stopping to think what'll happen.
18:36You're right.
18:37And you want to know something?
18:40I wouldn't change you for the world.
18:48Mum!
18:49You may not like the way I am, but tough, that's how it is.
18:52I guess you're stuck with me.
18:56You just had to turn my only son against me
18:58and now he doesn't want to come home with me, that's all.
19:00What?
19:01She said that you just turned her only son against her.
19:04I heard. Thank you.
19:06See you in a moment.
19:10Energize!
19:15Where's my son?
19:16He's not in his room.
19:18Why?
19:19Why?
19:20I have him chained up in my deepest, darkest dungeon
19:24where you, dear sister, will never find him.
19:27Angelo!
19:28Get me out of here!
19:49THE END

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