SHIRTLESS STEF RULES!

Stefan Molyneux

13 February 2024 TUESDAY Night Live!  Is "Forgive your enemies" UPB?  Join the PREMIUM philosophy community on the web for free!  Get my new series on the Truth About the French Revolution, access to the audiobook for my new book 'Peaceful Parenting,' StefBOT-AI, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and more!  See you soon!  https://freedomain.locals.com/support/promo/UPB2022

Transcript

00:00:00 Good evening, it is the 13th of February 2024. We've shifted the show to Tuesday

00:00:09 from Wednesday because Wednesday is in fact, as you know, Valentine's Day. My

00:00:14 wife and I of course are much to the lovely and elevated sentiments of our

00:00:18 daughter, hopeless romantics, so we'll be doing romantic stuff and I, you know, much

00:00:24 though I love talking with you, Valentine's with my wife, I'm afraid, is

00:00:27 taking slight precedence. So tomorrow night's show is cancelled for want of

00:00:32 love and we may in fact even hug in front of our daughter and then she will

00:00:38 she will pay lots of money to have us stop doing that. It's a beautiful thing.

00:00:41 There's a Babylon Bee article, something like "Mother embarrasses teenage son by

00:00:47 existing in public."

00:00:50 All right, so let me just get to your comments. Hello and welcome to everyone.

00:00:56 Thank you for dropping by tonight, a real pleasure. Real, real pleasure and I, you

00:01:00 know, it's such a pleasure to be, like genuine pleasure, genuine pleasure to

00:01:04 chat with you guys tonight. So, "Hey Steph, what do you think about turning down

00:01:08 clients?" I had a client who was willing to pay a lot for my work but wouldn't

00:01:13 give me any information about the job unless I locked in first. No, no, no, no. So

00:01:18 in the business world is full of scams. The business world is full of scams and

00:01:26 don't get involved with anything like, trust your gut, right? Trust your gut. If

00:01:31 there's shady stuff that feels like it's going on, shady stuff is going on and

00:01:36 people are like, "Well, I'll just take a step further." "Well, I'll just take a step

00:01:40 further," right? Like everyone gets these spam emails that seem legit and you know

00:01:45 it's like, "Eh, you know, no, not so much," right? So, I just, you got to trust your

00:01:52 gut with this kind of stuff. Wouldn't give me information, I won't give you

00:01:56 any information about the job unless you're locked in first. That's a

00:02:01 absolute, like, nobody does business like that who's on the up and up at all. So,

00:02:06 the good news is he's not a client. The even better news is that he'll never be

00:02:11 a client and thus get you to work on his illegal website or whatever he's doing,

00:02:16 right? I'm just guessing, right? "Hey Steph, thanks for everything, many

00:02:22 years with you now. You are the man, however my wife does not agree." I assume

00:02:28 that's because to your wife you're the man, not me, which is exactly how it

00:02:30 should be. If we get a question good enough, I will Hulk-style tear off my

00:02:36 shirt, even though I haven't really worked out today. I just went for a long

00:02:39 walk with my daughter. So, hey Peacemaker, nice to meet you. Hey, he says, "Hey, first

00:02:46 time catching you live on locals. You've been a great inspiration for me." Thank

00:02:49 you very much, I appreciate that.

00:02:53 "Thank you for the tip. Hello there." I will put a question forward. I like it

00:02:59 when people tell me what they're doing when they're doing it. "On the subject of

00:03:02 Christian principles, forgiving those who despitefully use you." Who spitefully use

00:03:09 you? "Once more, please check your typos." Forgiving those who spitefully use you,

00:03:15 forgive your enemies, is that something that UPB can/will support? Without a

00:03:21 judge to leave judgment to right the wrongs, to balance the scales of justice.

00:03:27 Okay, so this is a good test of UPB principles.

00:03:38 This is a good test of dealing with UPB principles. So, if we say, "Forgive your

00:03:46 enemies is UPB." Forgive your enemies is universally preferable behavior. Does

00:03:52 that pass

00:03:55 the two tests of UPB? The first is somewhat informal but very helpful, and

00:04:00 the second is more formal and often not needed. So, the first test is the comma

00:04:06 test. So, you must forgive your enemies. Okay, so can a man in a coma forgive his

00:04:14 enemies? He cannot. Well, a man in a coma is refraining from rape, theft, assault,

00:04:19 and murder, so he's fulfilling UPB principles that way. Can a man in a coma

00:04:25 forgive his enemies? Nope. Can't do anything. And UPB tells you what not to

00:04:32 do, it doesn't tell you what to do. Because what to do, if UPB tells you

00:04:36 what to do, it's a positive prescription, then UPB can't be universalized. Yeah, it

00:04:44 can't be UPB because then you need to always have enemies to forgive. And also,

00:04:49 it's asymmetrical, right? So, you have Bob the wrongdoer and Doug the victim. Should

00:04:54 Doug forgive Bob? Well, Bob can't forgive Doug because Bob is the

00:05:00 wrongdoer, and therefore, not both Bob and Doug. It's impossible for them to

00:05:04 achieve forgiving your enemies at the same time. They can't simultaneously

00:05:08 because it's asymmetrical. One person has to be the good guy, one has to be the bad

00:05:11 guy. And if you have a moral principle which requires one person to be the good

00:05:17 person and the other person to be the bad person, you don't have a universal.

00:05:21 You've not got the "you" in UPB. So, no, it can't be. So, it doesn't

00:05:27 follow either one of those. And yeah, once you get used to,

00:05:31 you know, comatose and universality. Comatose and universality. Joe, I'm so

00:05:37 sorry to hear that. I will get to that. I'm so sorry to hear that. We will

00:05:41 get to that, I promise you.

00:05:44 So,

00:05:50 let me ask you this.

00:05:55 Why do you think one of Jesus's most famous commandments is

00:06:05 to forgive your enemies? Why do you think one of Jesus's most famous commandments

00:06:13 is to forgive your enemies?

00:06:16 Well, not just to forgive, but to love your enemies. Why would he say that? And

00:06:24 it's famous because it's very much against our instincts, right? So, why would

00:06:31 Jesus say that? Can you explain that? "I can forgive and also want to be forgiven."

00:06:36 How is that not UPB? Sorry if the question is silly. No, that's totally

00:06:39 fine. That's totally fine. So, just while we get people typing in their answers

00:06:43 about the whole Jesus thing, "How I can forgive and also want to be forgiven." So,

00:06:48 let's say that you are having a fight with a guy named Bob, right? You are

00:06:54 having a fight with a guy named Bob, and the commandment is, "Is it UPB for you to

00:06:58 forgive Bob?" Well, it can't be UPB because Bob has no reason to forgive you, right?

00:07:04 So, if you are forgiving Bob, Bob can't also be in a position to forgive you

00:07:09 because Bob has to have done some wrong to you, right?

00:07:14 So, Bob can't achieve UPB because Bob has no need to forgive you. You have a need

00:07:22 to forgive Bob. Bob did wrong to you, and therefore, in the moment of forgiving Bob,

00:07:26 you are exercising something that Bob can't also do. So, you can't both be moral

00:07:30 at the same time. Also, what happens right after you forgive Bob, you can't be good

00:07:33 anymore. Universally preferable behavior means

00:07:36 independent of time and space. Independent of time and space. And if it

00:07:43 requires one person to be bad in order for the virtue to be achieved, it can't

00:07:46 be universal, right? Because people who have wronged you can use that against

00:07:51 you because abusers want to get away with bad behavior, and Jesus enables that.

00:07:54 Forgiveness doesn't preclude justice. As usual, let's make it about me. I say this

00:08:01 as a hopefully vivid example of a virtue that I try to enable, as a virtue I try

00:08:08 to enable or manifest at least.

00:08:12 So, would you say that I am a reasonably happy and positive fellow?

00:08:22 Would you say, hit me with a "why" if you think I'm a reasonably happy and a

00:08:28 positive fellow. And this is going to be a rant, by the way. Now, if you don't, if

00:08:35 that's fine, if you see hidden disco balls of mirrored bitterness deep in my

00:08:39 eyeballs, you can certainly say that. But, so most people are saying yes, one

00:08:44 person says no, that's totally fine. So, I would say, I would say reasonably.

00:08:51 Reasonably, your mate Dave says no, I'm not. Yeah, okay, so I mean that's fine. It

00:08:57 could be that I'm unreasonably, relatively positive and happy. Okay, most

00:09:03 of your stuff is negative. Interesting, okay. Most of your stuff is negative.

00:09:08 Alright, so, but that's not why I didn't ask about my work, I was asking about

00:09:14 myself, right. Am I, not is the work that I produce, right. Because if I'm a critic,

00:09:19 right, it's like if you're a person who really enjoys critiquing movies, you

00:09:23 can be very happy while putting out critic criticisms of others, right.

00:09:30 You strike me as a reasonable, at least reasonably positive. Alright, now, hit me

00:09:35 with a why as well, if it's also fair to say that I have suffered maybe even

00:09:41 slightly more than my fair share of injustice, hostility, lies, falsehood,

00:09:45 slander and nonsense, attacks, de-platforming, misrepresentation and all

00:09:51 kinds of crap on the internet and in the world. Is it fair to say that I have

00:09:56 been unjustly treated, despite having very good motivations for most of what I

00:10:00 do, do you think that it's fair to say I have been unjustly treated in the world?

00:10:05 As a whole?

00:10:08 Oh God, yes. Oh God, yes. I think that's, I think that's fair to say. I think that's

00:10:19 fair to say. Now, so is it the case that I have forgiven

00:10:29 my enemies? Have I forgiven my enemies? How can I be reasonably positive and

00:10:37 happy, having been treated so unjustly? Unjustly.

00:10:45 How is that possible? Have I been fulfilling the biblical commandment of

00:10:52 forgiving my enemies, if I remain positive and happy, despite

00:11:01 endless and unjust attacks?

00:11:07 Yes, you don't actually have to repeat the attacks here. You can, I'm just saying.

00:11:12 Right? So, you haven't sought justice. That's interesting. I'm not sure what

00:11:20 seeking justice would mean in this context.

00:11:27 Are you ready to get dark, hot, and heavy right away?

00:11:40 Are you ready to get dark, hot, and heavy right at the opening of the show? Because

00:11:47 this, how can you forgive when there's no one to ask for forgiveness? I don't know

00:11:52 what that means.

00:11:55 Are you ready? Are you sure? Okay, do me a favor.

00:12:01 Hit me with, whether you want shirt on or shirt off for this rant. In other words,

00:12:08 hit me with an O for on or an O for off. I'll take either one. O for on or O for

00:12:15 off. Just to tell me whether you want shirt on or shirt off for this particular

00:12:24 rant. I may even take my glasses off. I may even, in fact, unscrew my nipples so

00:12:30 that you can see my gills.

00:12:33 It's a tough call. Yeah, it's O, right? It's OO. It's a tough call. It's a tough call.

00:12:39 Shall I tease you?

00:12:43 Shall I tease you? Oh yeah, baby.

00:12:49 Oh yeah, that's the good stuff. That's what happens when I get a couple of

00:12:54 donations early on. Oh, all right, this may even be a semi-standing rant. How is

00:13:05 it possible to remain positive and happy after being unjustly lied about, slandered,

00:13:10 misrepresented, kicked off, ostracized, exorcised? How is it possible for this to

00:13:17 occur? Have I forgiven my enemies? I have not forgiven my enemies. However, they're

00:13:26 not my enemies. Oh, the subtlety of theology. They're not my enemies. They're

00:13:34 not my enemies. They don't hate me. Honestly, nobody hates me. I'm far too

00:13:41 likable. I'm far too enjoyable. I'm far too charming. I'm far too funny. I'm far

00:13:45 too engaging. I'm far too positive and I'm far too happy. Nobody hates me.

00:13:51 It's a simple fact. People might seethe and type and edit and lie, but they don't

00:13:57 hate me. They don't hate me. Forgive my enemies? I don't have any enemies. They

00:14:02 don't hate me. What do they hate? The truth, themselves, anybody who interferes

00:14:06 with their power? They don't hate me. Like, if you have a drug addict

00:14:12 and you stand between the drug addict and his drug, he hates you? No, he doesn't

00:14:17 hate you. He doesn't hate you. He might rail against you and shake his

00:14:21 fists at you. He might even try and headbutt you or take out a bread knife

00:14:25 and threaten you. He doesn't hate you.

00:14:29 He doesn't hate you. He hates anyone who gets between him and his drugs. You

00:14:34 understand? It could be anyone. It could be the Pope. It could be a Haitian

00:14:40 migrant. It could be anyone. Anyone who stands between the addict and his drug is

00:14:43 hated. What the addict hates is the interference with the drug. Does not hate

00:14:49 the person. Does not hate the individual. It's not fucking personal.

00:14:54 It's not personal.

00:14:57 Do you think any of the shit that's said about me is personal and it's a just and

00:15:02 fair and righteous evaluation of my character? Oh my god, let's go after

00:15:07 the guy who's into peaceful parenting and science and facts. Let's go after the

00:15:13 guy who interviews experts. Let's go after the guy who's anti-childhood abuse

00:15:19 and genital mutilation. Yeah, that's the guy. Let's get him.

00:15:26 Let's get after the guy who writes poetry and loves Shakespeare. Yeah, that's

00:15:31 our enemy. No, it's not personal.

00:15:35 It's not personal.

00:15:39 It's not personal because anyone who said what I said would be hated the same.

00:15:47 And we know that because people who say what I say is hated the same. It's not

00:15:53 personal. I don't have any enemies. I don't. I have no enemies. I have nobody

00:15:58 who hates me. To know me is to love me. Honestly, I have nobody who hates me.

00:16:03 And this is why, I mean, why on earth would you let liars and cheats and

00:16:10 scoundrels and villains convince you that their hatred had anything to do

00:16:15 with you? I mean, do you think my mother hated me? She didn't hate me.

00:16:22 She actually quite liked me and loved me in her own way from time to time.

00:16:25 Didn't hate me. Didn't hate me at all. Right? And I know that because it's not

00:16:31 personal to me.

00:16:34 Not personal to me.

00:16:39 Hatred is a form of lust. It is a form of lust.

00:16:47 Now, lust dehumanizes the object. So, let's say you're a boob guy, right?

00:16:54 Elon Musk just posted about this. Let's say you're a boob guy. Now, if there's a

00:16:58 woman with a great rack, you are aroused by her boobs. But it's not her. It's not

00:17:04 personal to her. It's dehumanizing in a way. Because it could be anyone with

00:17:10 those boobs that you would lust for. I mean, assuming some age

00:17:17 restrictions, right? That she's a young adult.

00:17:22 It's not personal to that person.

00:17:26 Someone who's really pretty. You're attracted to the prettiness,

00:17:32 not the person. Because anyone who looked like that,

00:17:36 or anyone who's that pretty, you will also be attracted to. It's not

00:17:39 personal. And we go through this absolute

00:17:43 tumbleweed, sock-in-the-dryer chaos of lives because we take

00:17:46 everything so fucking personally.

00:17:51 We take everything so personally. Oh, that guy's got a real

00:18:02 problem with me. He really hates me.

00:18:06 No, he doesn't. No, he doesn't.

00:18:12 It's a form of vanity to think that people's hostility

00:18:22 towards you is about you. It's a form of vanity.

00:18:26 Vanity is thinking everything's about you, and you're super important, and

00:18:29 you're the main character. No. No. No.

00:18:34 If your girlfriend is cheating on your best friend, and you tell...

00:18:38 If your girlfriend is cheating on your best friend, and you tell

00:18:42 your friend that his girlfriend is cheating on him,

00:18:45 does she hate you? Of course she does. Is it personal?

00:18:48 Nope. Not at all. Because she would hate anyone who told her boyfriend that she

00:18:56 was cheating on him.

00:18:59 Right? Does the criminal hate the cop who arrests him? He does

00:19:05 not. He might say, "I hate you, you..." whatever.

00:19:09 But he does not hate the cop who arrests him. He hates being arrested.

00:19:12 It's not personal to the cop.

00:19:16 It's not personal to the cop. People hate the consequences of other

00:19:22 people's actions, which is not the same as saying

00:19:24 they hate that person.

00:19:27 People hate the consequences of other people's actions, which is not to say

00:19:33 they hate those people. Right? So let me give you an example.

00:19:38 Whoop whoop. Right? You're driving along, going over the speed limit, cop pulls you

00:19:44 over. Right? And you're like, "Oh man, such a drag. I

00:19:47 can't afford this. I..." Whatever. "I don't want... I can't handle the points. I don't

00:19:50 want my insurance to go up. This is bad, bad, bad."

00:19:52 Right? Cop comes in, you're like, "Oh man, I can't stand this cop."

00:19:59 And he's got you dead to rights.

00:20:03 You go back and forth with the cop, and finally he says, "Right, son, we'll let

00:20:09 you off with a warning this time, but lettin' up on the lead foot, all right?"

00:20:14 And you're like, "Oh, thank you, officer." Oh, and you feel such sweet relief.

00:20:18 "Now you love this guy. He's the best cop ever." Right? You've gone from

00:20:22 hating this cop, fearing this cop, to loving this cop, singing his praises.

00:20:26 You'd give him a great Yelp review if he had food.

00:20:31 I couldn't even smell the donut dust on his nose. He was so great.

00:20:39 I burned the shirt off with the intensity of my self-protection.

00:20:47 Why would you imagine other people can see beyond their own ass hair

00:20:54 and see you beyond the foliage of their own,

00:20:57 often degradation? You don't even show up in their world. Only the effects of your

00:21:01 actions show up in the world. You are only important to most people

00:21:07 insofar as you affect them, not in and of yourself,

00:21:13 qua yourself, you as you. It's you as it affects them.

00:21:18 You hate the cop when he thinks he's going to give you a ticket. You love the

00:21:20 cop when he lets you off with a warning. You see? You only judge him relative to

00:21:24 his effect on you.

00:21:27 You buy the lottery ticket. You win a thousand dollars. You're desperate for

00:21:32 money. You give the store owner a big hug. "Oh, you're so great, man. You love him. You

00:21:36 love all of humanity. Everything's wonderful. I've got money."

00:21:41 Do you love that store owner? You do not. Whereas the next guy who comes in and

00:21:48 shoplifts and the store owner catches him and calls the cops, and let's assume

00:21:51 this isn't California, he might actually be in some trouble.

00:21:54 That thief, he hates that store owner. "Man,

00:22:01 he's gonna get me in trouble with the cops. Damn him."

00:22:05 So you love him because you just won a thousand dollars. The next guy hates him

00:22:09 because he's shoplifted and got caught. Right?

00:22:15 It's the same guy, isn't it? It's the same guy,

00:22:19 isn't it? Same store owner. One person loves him. The other person hates him

00:22:24 because all they care about is the effects

00:22:28 the store owner has on their lives.

00:22:33 That's all they care about.

00:22:38 There's your nip.

00:22:44 Make sense?

00:22:48 Make sense? Two. Two nips. Yes, it is in fact two nips.

00:22:53 Asterisk that you can see.

00:22:57 I'll let you go on that mind journey on your own.

00:23:02 20,000 leagues under the 200 chest hairs for the win.

00:23:07 People don't hate me. They don't. They hate the effect

00:23:16 I have on their lives, which is to say they hate the effect that the truth has

00:23:21 on their lives.

00:23:23 Right? Anyone tell that I had a little bit of a nap this afternoon?

00:23:29 I believe you can. But this is in fact decaf coffee.

00:23:35 People don't hate you.

00:23:39 I mean, assuming you're a decent person, right? They don't hate you.

00:23:43 If I say to people, "Hey, family relations are voluntary and if you've been abused

00:23:47 you don't have to see your abusers." Well, that

00:23:49 gives abusers less hold over their victims.

00:23:54 Do they hate me? No, they don't hate me. They don't know me.

00:24:00 And nobody can hate me, right? The virtuous can't be hated.

00:24:07 The effects of the statements of the virtuous

00:24:13 on the lives of the immoral can be hated. But you can't

00:24:17 hate virtue.

00:24:20 You can't.

00:24:24 Let's say you have a good police officer in the neighborhood and you're a good

00:24:31 person. Will you ever hate the cop? Nope. You'll be thankful he's there. "Thank you,

00:24:36 officer. Hey, here's a cup of coffee like when I lived downtown on Tecumseh

00:24:41 many, many years ago. There was a coffee shop on the corner and they had a

00:24:44 standing policy free coffee and donuts to the cops. They loved having the cops by.

00:24:47 They loved the cops being there. They loved the cops being in the neighborhood

00:24:50 because they wanted their property to be protected and they were very happy to

00:24:53 have the police officers there."

00:24:57 If you're being robbed in an alley and a cop comes running down the alley,

00:25:03 you're super thrilled. The guy robbing you

00:25:07 is super unthrilled.

00:25:11 You love the fact that the cop is running down the alley.

00:25:14 The other person hates that the cop is running down the alley. You love the cop

00:25:18 for what he's doing. The criminal hates the cop for what he's

00:25:20 doing. See? It's completely subjective. I mean, you could say that the cop in

00:25:24 protecting your property rights is doing a good thing.

00:25:26 I get all of that. But you understand that the emotional reactions

00:25:30 have nothing to do with the cop's nature. If the cop turns... and so you can

00:25:34 see this flip. You're getting robbed. Cop's running down the alley

00:25:38 and it turns out that the cop is in league with the criminal and the cop

00:25:41 robs you again. Then now you are happy. Now you're unhappy.

00:25:44 And then the criminal was really unhappy until he saw it was his buddy, the

00:25:47 corrupt cop, and then they both rob you and he's happy and they...

00:25:49 right? Up and down. What's the objective nature of these feelings?

00:25:56 Tell me I'm wrong. I'm happy to hear.

00:26:08 Do I forgive my enemies? I have no enemies.

00:26:14 Now the truth has enemies or to put it another way,

00:26:18 the effect of the truth on the moral... sorry, the effect of the truth on the

00:26:22 immoral has the immoral hate the truth or rather

00:26:25 they hate the effects of the truth on their lives.

00:26:29 Are you with me? Hit me with a "y" if you're following

00:26:34 along. I know this sounds annoyingly condescending. I just want to make sure

00:26:39 it's making sense but I don't want to repeat where it's unnecessary.

00:26:45 Wait, I'm going to grab a little inspiration. Tweak! Purple Nurble myself.

00:26:53 People don't hate me. They don't hate the truth.

00:26:56 They hate the effects of the truth on their life.

00:27:02 And hatred, you know what hatred fundamentally is?

00:27:07 Hatred is the inability to rebut. Hatred is the inability to rebut people.

00:27:17 Hatred is what Satan turns up in the furnace of your soul

00:27:26 when he can't overthrow the arguments that are unseating him.

00:27:31 We wish to murder those who we cannot answer.

00:27:36 We wish to overthrow those whose rationality overthrows

00:27:41 our pettiness and falseness.

00:27:45 We wish to destroy the courageous not because they're courageous,

00:27:49 not because of them themselves. We wish to destroy the courageous because

00:27:53 they make us feel...

00:27:57 ...immoral.

00:28:00 Immorality is foundationally and fundamentally selfish.

00:28:05 That's bad if you're under their power but it's good if all they're doing is

00:28:09 insulting you because that's the nature of evil.

00:28:11 It's fundamentally selfish. They don't care about me. They care

00:28:16 about the effects that what I say has on their life.

00:28:19 And if the effects of what I say plus other people's free will

00:28:23 has a negative effect on their life, they hate the negative effect.

00:28:27 They can't answer so they insult. I mean, ad hominem 101, right?

00:28:34 You'd be completely shocked at how few people

00:28:45 know you, understand you, care about you, evaluate you objectively.

00:28:49 You'd be shocked at how few people know you at all.

00:28:56 I mean, do you think my quote critics on the internet, do you think...

00:28:59 I'm sorry to be laughed... Do you think they know me at all? Do you think that

00:29:02 they understand me at all? Do you think that they care about me at all? Nope.

00:29:06 No. All they care about is the negative effects that my words have on their life.

00:29:12 I hate whatever politician. All right, yeah, well, no, you don't. You don't.

00:29:27 You hate the effect that that politician has on your life.

00:29:33 You've got to be precise about these things.

00:29:39 You don't hate whatever structure, whatever power, whatever...

00:29:45 You hate the effect they have on your life.

00:29:49 Why is hatred dependent on knowing your true self?

00:29:59 I have no idea what that means and it's quite the opposite of what I've been saying.

00:30:05 So, don't take it personally. If you take it personally, you're mistaking the

00:30:11 mechanics of the interaction.

00:30:15 You're mistaking the mechanics of the interaction.

00:30:19 When most people say, "I hate you," they're saying,

00:30:33 "I hate how your actions make me feel."

00:30:37 "I hate how your actions make me feel." That's all.

00:30:46 You know, the sour grapes guy who asks the girl out, she says no, and he's like,

00:30:53 "Oh, she's not that pretty anyway." Well, he hates...

00:30:56 He doesn't hate her. He just hates the feeling of rejection.

00:31:02 So, forgive your enemies. To me, one of the foundational wisdoms about that, and

00:31:10 it's a very interesting phrase, love your enemies. Your enemies teach you...

00:31:16 Who teaches you? And this is an interesting question. I don't know the

00:31:20 answer. I have some suspicions, certainly not

00:31:24 anything conclusive. Who teaches you more

00:31:26 about virtue? The good or the evil among us? The good people or the evil people

00:31:36 among us? Who teaches you more about virtue? The moral or the immoral?

00:31:40 Which is another way of saying, which sensation teaches you more about safety?

00:31:48 Pleasure or pain? Are we virtuous for the sake of pleasure, or are we

00:31:57 virtuous to recoil from evildoers? Are we moral? And we can say not the

00:32:07 entirety of our journey. What first propels us into the quest for virtue and

00:32:13 for wisdom? What first propels us in that direction? Is it a love of virtue and a

00:32:20 desire for abstract happiness ten years down the road? No! Almost never. I've

00:32:27 never heard of such a thing. I've never heard of such a thing. I can scarcely

00:32:34 imagine such a thing, which doesn't mean I'm right. It could be a complete

00:32:36 failure of imagination on my part. What first propels us on the journey

00:32:43 to virtue? I think almost always you will find it is a horror at and a recoil from

00:32:55 the vicious, maggoty corruptions of evil.

00:33:02 Did you become good because you valued virtue and you wanted to achieve

00:33:11 goodness down the road, sometimes five years, ten years, or more? Or did you

00:33:23 have your face pressed into the sucking chest wound, the maggoty virulence of stone evil,

00:33:30 and ran screaming a thousand miles in the other direction, woke up when you

00:33:35 stopped screaming because your throat was bleeding, and you went, "Holy shit!

00:33:38 I think I made it to virtue." Running away from that horror. I think I made it to

00:33:52 virtue. Now let's keep going. This is great. Was it a laborious climb to a

00:33:59 summit you couldn't see, or were you simply fleeing the rising blood tides of drowning immorality?

00:34:06 Somebody says, "Christ had enemies. They hated him. They tortured and killed him.

00:34:18 They made him suffer immensely. He forgave the ones who hated him."

00:34:23 Why separate the actions of man from the thoughts that made him do those actions?

00:34:28 If people don't hate you, but they hate the behavior, aren't you removing the importance

00:34:35 of the will of the man-mans who did the virtuous behavior?

00:34:40 My God, people, could you not fucking proofread? Is this an impossible thing?

00:34:47 If people don't hate you, but they hate the behavior, aren't you

00:34:51 removing the importance of the will of the man-mans who did the virtuous behavior?

00:34:55 I don't know what that fucking word salad is at the end there, so I'm just going to ignore that.

00:34:59 People don't hate my behavior. They don't hate me. I'm on a phone. So?

00:35:10 "Oh, you have excuses." Oh, no, you have excuses, and therefore you don't have to do basic

00:35:16 proofreading. "Criticism leads to excuses. How mature." How mature? You can just say sorry.

00:35:24 "I'm the man. I typed it twice by accident." I don't care that you typed it. My issue is not

00:35:29 that you typed it twice by accident. Stop giving me these soy boy excuses.

00:35:33 My issue is that you didn't proofread it before you sent it. They waste everyone's time.

00:35:37 The fact that you made a mistake is not the issue. The fact that you didn't proofread

00:35:44 is the issue, and the fact that you're not just saying, "Oh, sorry,

00:35:46 but you're giving me all these mealy-mouthed excuses."

00:35:51 People don't hate virtuous people. They don't hate virtuous actions.

00:35:57 The virtuous actions, because they're selfish. Evil is selfish. Therefore, it only hates that

00:36:02 which causes it a negative experience.

00:36:05 Evil only hates that which causes a negative experience.

00:36:12 You stand between the drug and the drug addict, and you prevent the drug addict who's jonesy

00:36:19 for the drug. You prevent the drug addict from getting hold of the drug. Does he hate you? No.

00:36:24 Does he hate your actions? No. Because if you were doing the exact same actions,

00:36:28 four feet to the right, he'd be free to get his drugs. He doesn't hate the actions.

00:36:32 What does he hate? He doesn't hate you, because if anyone was standing

00:36:38 there, he'd hate that person, too. He doesn't hate your actions, because if you were doing it

00:36:42 four feet over, he wouldn't care. But if anybody else was doing the same actions,

00:36:46 he would hate that, too. It's the interference with getting the drug that he hates.

00:36:51 It's all about him. It's nothing to do with you. It's nothing to do with you.

00:36:57 Now, you can say, "Ah, yes, but I am responsible for my actions."

00:37:00 I get all of that. I get all of that. But from the standpoint

00:37:03 of the immoral person, it's not you. That's freedom.

00:37:15 That's freedom. It's not about you.

00:37:19 When my mother was beating me, did she hate me? She did not.

00:37:26 Did she hate? Was she trying to punish me? She was not. Was she trying to make me do better things?

00:37:35 She was not. She was doing none of those things in any way, shape, or form.

00:37:42 Something happened that made her feel bad, and beating me made her feel better.

00:37:47 Something happened that made her feel bad,

00:37:53 and beating me made her feel better.

00:37:58 Hatred. Oh, hatred is grooming for violence. Hatred is the fire that you set under the kettle

00:38:10 of your heart so that it whistles into violence. Hatred is usually a dress rehearsal for a murder.

00:38:16 Collective hatred is a dress rehearsal for mass murder.

00:38:19 Hatred is talking yourself into violence.

00:38:25 Yeah, it is a desire to destroy, which is why it's engendered when people can't answer your arguments.

00:38:38 People do evil largely on the supposition that they won't pay for it.

00:38:44 And when it looks like they might actually end up paying for it,

00:38:49 they get really angry. If I'd have known ahead of time, like if a bank robber knew ahead of time

00:38:57 that he was going to get caught, he wouldn't rob the bank. There's no point. He wouldn't rob the bank.

00:39:03 If you knew for certain that the girl was going to say no to you asking her out, you wouldn't ask her out.

00:39:10 Evil is done on the premise that it won't be punished.

00:39:18 So, when you "punish evil" by giving consequences,

00:39:31 they feel fooled. "Damn it! I abused my kids if I'd have known that some jerkwad,

00:39:37 bald-headed, giant-ostrich-thumb, speckle-headed philosopher was going to come along and say

00:39:42 that you don't have to spend time with abusive people. Maybe I wouldn't have abused my kids!"

00:39:46 They're enraged at being caught because they did their evil on the assumption they could get away

00:39:59 with it, which is why withholding negative consequences from evildoers is embedding them

00:40:06 further in immorality. Evil is a soul destroyed by greed. When somebody with true compassion

00:40:21 and a benevolent spirit comes along, they know it's win-lose. But it's not personal. Evil is weak,

00:40:28 love is powerful. That's not even remotely true. Sorry, evil is very powerful. Have you not looked

00:40:34 at the world lately? Evil is very powerful. Evil is very powerful. That's just a hallmark card that

00:40:40 people gaslight themselves to pretend that they're in less danger than they are. And be careful of

00:40:46 that. "My skin is strong, the lion's claws are weak." It's like, that's pretty dangerous.

00:40:53 "My mother didn't hate me because if I'd have been anyone else, she would have beat that too.

00:41:04 She would have beat that kid too. It wasn't personal to me. It wasn't personal to me at all.

00:41:10 I was just a body. I was a punching bag. I was an emotional tampon. Whatever you want.

00:41:18 I was just something to vent on. It wasn't personal to me." Because do you know what

00:41:27 unbelievable danger you're in? If you, let's say that your parents were abusive, or teachers,

00:41:33 or whoever, right? Or people on the internet. Let's say that your parents were abusive and

00:41:37 you think it has something to do with you. You can never fucking escape it. You can never escape it.

00:41:45 Because it has something to do with you, which means it sticks to you.

00:41:48 Like a tattoo on your stomach lining, it sticks to you. It's embedded within you. You can't get

00:41:55 away from it because it was about you. But the truth of the matter is, if you were abused as a

00:42:03 kid, it didn't have anything to do with you. So you can walk away from it, leaving no stain,

00:42:11 no trail of blood. It had nothing to do with you.

00:42:16 Energize a bunny your way back out of that had nothing to do with you.

00:42:20 It wasn't personal. It wasn't about anything you did, or anything you didn't do. It wasn't about

00:42:30 obedience, or rebellion, or not putting the dishes away, or not cleaning up your room,

00:42:34 or not getting an A on your test, or anything like that, or getting up early, or getting up late.

00:42:39 It had nothing to do with that. You want to know what it was.

00:42:48 You want to know what it was. If you were abused.

00:42:55 Most times you have a headache. I mean, you'll try a little massage or whatever. You have a

00:43:05 headache. For me, I don't know. I rarely get headaches, but every now and then, you know,

00:43:13 you sleep funny or whatever, you wake up early, you get a bit of a headache. So, you know,

00:43:18 work out, I'll stretch it out a little bit here and there. But after a while, I'll just take a

00:43:24 aspirin or whatever, right? And that's fine.

00:43:32 That's fine. What is my emotional relationship to the aspirin?

00:43:40 The aspirin is an object that makes me feel better. And that's fucking all.

00:43:50 The aspirin is a thing that takes away my pain. And that's

00:43:59 why I have no value for the aspirin, other than take away my pain.

00:44:08 If I don't have any aspirin, I'm maybe mildly annoyed or whatever, because then I got to go

00:44:19 and get some aspirin. And it's not personal, though. I don't hate the aspirin now.

00:44:28 I can tell you get headaches. It's a kind of creepy thing. I get very few headaches.

00:44:34 Everyone gets headaches, don't they? You get a cold every now and then.

00:44:37 People are... I don't know. It's kind of funny.

00:44:41 So, I have no personal relationship to the aspirin. I don't care about the aspirin.

00:44:48 I don't think about the aspirin. I don't check in with, "Hey, aspirin, how are you doing today? I

00:44:53 know it's been a while since we've had anything to do with each other. Just wanted to check in

00:44:57 and see what's new." Sorry you suffer from this condition. Aren't you an odd bird?

00:45:08 I take... I mean, honestly, I'll take an aspirin for a headache maybe three or four times a year.

00:45:14 I don't have a personal relationship with the aspirin. I just use it.

00:45:26 When I need to feel better. Abusive parents don't have a personal relationship with you.

00:45:31 They just use you when they need to feel better.

00:45:35 When they need to feel better.

00:45:41 I have no feelings about the aspirin. I have no relationship to the aspirin.

00:45:50 I use the aspirin to feel better.

00:45:55 The aspirin, if it was conscious, would say, "I love helping Steph, man. I'm just sitting here in

00:46:03 this dack-ass bottle just waiting. My purpose is to help Steph feel better. Steph, he's forgotten

00:46:10 about me maybe, but he really cares. And oh, look, I'm being lifted up. Oh, listen, he's figured out

00:46:15 the childproof container. Glorious sunlight is pouring in. He's picking me up, putting me on

00:46:21 his tongue and downing me with a glass of water. I am at one with the sky god, Steph. We are

00:46:27 united. We are combined. We have merged. I dissolve and make him right."

00:46:34 No, it's just that I need a pill. Down it goes.

00:46:37 That's all.

00:46:50 Bad people have a negative experience of what I say, and not just what I say, but how I say it

00:46:55 and all of that. And so they feel put down, and so they insult me. Virtue insults them. They

00:47:00 insult the virtuous. It's a form of leveling, and it's a form of self-protection against virtue.

00:47:08 So people who tell falsehoods about me, in my view, are inoculating other people against the

00:47:17 truth and virtue that I am talking about. Of course. I mean, of course. Of course they are.

00:47:25 And what else would they be doing? I mean, maybe a few of them transitioned to virtue. I consider

00:47:30 that quite unlikely. It's possible. But what else would they be doing? Evil wants to flourish. Evil

00:47:36 wants to control. Evil wants to rule. Evil wants to have power. And if virtue gets in the way,

00:47:40 then you have to inoculate people against virtue. So what you do is you stick as many negative

00:47:46 labels to the virtuous person as humanly possible in order to protect your own evil self-interest,

00:47:49 and to make sure fewer people get exposure to the truth.

00:47:54 Of course. It's not personal. It's not about me. It's not about you.

00:48:00 Because they can't think outside themselves. They can only think in

00:48:05 terms of their own interests, their own preference, their own benefits. And that's fucking it.

00:48:09 [Pause]

00:48:19 Stephan, I can never repay you for your amount of knowledge transfer to me. Thank you. I appreciate

00:48:23 that. You can try freedomain.com/donate. Help me buy a shirt.

00:48:30 [Pause]

00:48:35 Forgive your enemies. They're not your enemies. They're not your enemies.

00:48:43 Jesus said morality is universal and accessible to everyone.

00:48:50 Right? Did that harm some people's interests? Apparently.

00:48:59 Did they hate him? No. Did they hate his words? No. No. They hated the effect that his words had

00:49:13 on them. That's it. They hated the effects that his words had on them.

00:49:26 So, it's all about them. It's not about Jesus independent of them.

00:49:31 It's about Jesus' effect on them.

00:49:38 I mean, let me ask you this. How many people are angry at the theology of Thor these days?

00:49:49 How many people are angry at the theology and moral arguments of the high priesthood of Thor

00:49:58 or Haerdel or Hera or Loki? Big debates, fights, anger, are people saying, "Oh my god, we've got

00:50:11 to have hate speech laws so that those Thor adherents don't say improper things about Hera."

00:50:19 You kind of can repay him for all this amazing knowledge. Thank you for the tip. I appreciate

00:50:23 that. But you follow? So, listen, there were times when there were massive fights, wars,

00:50:32 religious conflicts, torture, murder over what the priesthood of Thor was saying.

00:50:43 Why aren't those fights happening now? Because nothing that the priesthood of Thor is saying

00:50:50 has any effect on any evil people at all. So, they don't care.

00:50:57 Tim says he was also the first to dignify and respect children. Yes.

00:51:03 "I'll just do it short," says Zimpf. "I had to be the punching bag,

00:51:09 stress ball for my family's unresolved issues." Right. Now, punching bag and stress ball is great.

00:51:16 Imagine if the punching bag were sentient. It would say, "Lord above, holy Thor, why the hell

00:51:25 does everyone hate me? I'm getting gut punched 5,000 times a day. What did I ever do to these

00:51:30 people? I'm just sitting here, leathery, giant penis-shaped, hanging from the ceiling. It's

00:51:35 already kind of uncomfortable. I had a crick in my neck and I could actually use an Advil."

00:51:40 "Why the fuck does everyone just come up and punch me in the gut all day? What the hell?

00:51:43 They must be full of rabid anti-punching bag hatred. They must think that I murdered their

00:51:51 cat and I'm responsible for every dire thing in their life. They just beat the shit out of me and

00:51:56 I don't know why." "You don't hate the punching bag. It's just what you exercise on." Abusive

00:52:08 parents don't hate you. You're just what they exercise on. "Just getting a workout, loosening

00:52:13 up the shoulders, warming up the vocal cords, Freddie Mercury style. It's hard not to make it

00:52:21 personal when they've expended so much effort to convince me and others. Otherwise, of course,

00:52:24 yeah, I get that. That's why I'm doing half an hour on this because it is hard. It is hard

00:52:34 to not take it personally because part of the cruelty

00:52:36 is you internalizing the cruelty. You understand? You're easier to rule when you police yourself.

00:52:45 You're easier to rule when you police yourself. You're easier to abuse if you abuse yourself.

00:52:54 Break your will, break your spirit. That's the whole point of this

00:52:57 color revolution is to break your spill, break your will, break your will to resist.

00:53:03 So part of the abuse is getting you to abuse yourself. And they do that by saying, "It's you.

00:53:09 You're the problem. I'm doing this because of you and what you did and your personality and

00:53:12 your disobedience and your mess and your lack of studying and your talk back." Of course,

00:53:18 I get that. And I'm telling you, it's all a total lie. It's all a complete and total falsehood and

00:53:28 fiction and nonsense. None of it is true. None of it is real. You were not hated. You were just used

00:53:37 like a punching bag, like an aspirin, like a vomit bag on a plane. You ever see those little things

00:53:46 you're digging around as a kid, you're so bored. "Oh, is this a comic?" No, it's just the safety

00:53:51 instructions. "Oh, God. Oh, it's a vomit bag." You ever get sick of that vomit bag? Right? The

00:54:02 vomit bag is like, "Why do people hate me so much that they keep pouring the stomach contents on me?

00:54:07 It's acidic. It's uncomfortable to get thrown in the garbage. Why do they?" It's like, "No, you

00:54:10 don't hate the vomit bag. You don't hate the barf bag. You just need some place to put your barf.

00:54:16 It's not personal. You're not morally judging the barf bag. It's just convenient. And you, if you

00:54:22 were abused, you were just a barf bag for your parents. They didn't hate you. They just used you

00:54:26 because they got to have some place to put their barf. And they sure as hell ain't going to deal

00:54:30 with it themselves. So you have to suffer. You have to pay. It's not personal. If you interfere

00:54:37 with the actions, plans, projects, and well-being of evildoers, they will F you up. It's not personal.

00:54:45 It's not personal. You know, it's just business. It's an unholy business. It's an evil business.

00:54:54 It's a nasty business. It's an abusive business. It's just business. It's not personal.

00:55:00 The attacks on me? It's just business. It's not personal.

00:55:05 Otherwise, it'd be like, "God, my wife loves me. My daughter loves me. My friends love me.

00:55:12 Audience members, y'all love some of the stuff that I do. How is it possible

00:55:17 that I could be so loved and so hated? How is that possible?"

00:55:21 What a paradox.

00:55:30 You know, when you take a medicine, let's say you take antibiotics, right?

00:55:38 Your body loves that you're taking antibiotics. How does the bacteria feel that you're taking

00:55:43 antibiotics? "Oh, we're melting. We're dying. I hate these antibiotics."

00:55:47 What's good for your body is bad for the bacteria, the infection.

00:55:52 Your body's happy. The infection is unhappy.

00:55:56 When you wash your balls, let's talk about that. When you wash your balls,

00:56:03 there's a lot of bacteria that gets washed away. You ever seen that meme?

00:56:08 How women shower and there's a body with red all over it?

00:56:12 How do men shower? There's three red spots, balls, armpits, and the rest of it is,

00:56:18 "Eh, water will take care of it. Rinsing will take care of it."

00:56:20 Do you know how unhappy your ball bacteria is when you wash it?

00:56:32 When I use one of those giant pulley cranes to hold back my foreskin, right?

00:56:36 No, do you know what I mean? Every time you blow your nose, you've got a cold and you blow your

00:56:41 nose, all those cold viruses are so mad. But your body's happy, hey? That's why we're getting all

00:56:49 this snot and get rid of the viruses. How can medicine be so loved and so hated?

00:56:59 But that's all medicine. All medicine is loved and hated.

00:57:02 It's loved by your health and it's hated by the illness.

00:57:05 If we can't hate people, can we love them?

00:57:10 You know, try and follow what I'm saying and stop spitting up all of these fortune cookie

00:57:19 Panda Express d-biddies. Is up the downness of sidewaysness, really, when you think about it?

00:57:26 Can we really be both in and out at the same time?

00:57:29 Is there a difference between up and down? Is there a difference? Is there really?

00:57:35 Now, it is true that hatred is the shadow cast by being lovable because

00:57:47 to be truly lovable, you have to do good in the world. For people to love you, you have to do

00:57:54 good in the world. Doing good in the world means interfering with the preferences, actions, and

00:57:59 plans of evildoers and they'll hate you for that. But they don't hate you, they hate the interference

00:58:03 with that, blah blah blah, right? So yeah, hatred is the shadow cast by virtue.

00:58:09 Again, if an illness was sentient and you come up with a great cure for an illness,

00:58:16 the illness will hate you because the illness wants to expand, right? The cancer hates the

00:58:25 chemo, I get it, your body loves, well, it doesn't love the chemo, but it's fine. Cancer hates the chemo.

00:58:29 The tobacco farmer hates the nicotine patch.

00:58:40 You said we can't be hated. Yes. Sorry, I'm just going to have to not, I don't know,

00:58:47 you're not following the conversation, you're just trying to jump out of it. I said hatred is the

00:58:52 shadow cast by virtue in the world. I don't see how that contradicts what I said before,

00:59:00 but I guess you'll have to be listening with more than half an ear low to follow that.

00:59:06 So just listen, do me a favor, this is to BCDuff12, take yourself a little bit of a break

00:59:12 from posting, if you could, just do me a favor. No one hates me, so does anyone love me?

00:59:18 I don't know, I don't even know you. I mean, how am I supposed to know?

00:59:25 Stop making it about you, stop making it about you.

00:59:32 Stop making it about you. Thanks Tim, I appreciate that.

00:59:37 Don't be an ass.

00:59:41 But I have an ass. So in a sense, I be an ass. Because to be assless would to be British.

00:59:57 All right. I'm confused by BCDuff, yeah, he's aiming to just draw people away.

01:00:04 He's a fog thrower, right? So he's aiming to draw away the clarity of what I'm saying with endless,

01:00:09 pointless non-questions. So just, yeah, ignore him. Sorry to be rough, but just ignore him.

01:00:15 If you could, I would appreciate that.

01:00:23 Does this make sense? This is why I'm free of hatred.

01:00:29 If you, I have an ass and I am British. No, then you be an ass. Just kidding.

01:00:35 You're my dive. I don't know why that was vaguely Australian, but hey,

01:00:39 tour of the colonies as always.

01:00:40 So forgive your enemies.

01:00:50 Why does say, see, everyone says that like Jesus says, "Oh, forgive your enemies." What else does

01:00:55 he say? "Forgive them, Father, for what?" "Forgive them, Father, for what?" What is he saying?

01:01:02 On the cross, on Calvary, what is he saying? What does he say? Very explicitly,

01:01:09 very powerfully, "Forgive them, Father, for they know not what they do."

01:01:18 "They know not what they do."

01:01:23 Evil people have convinced themselves that they hate someone, and that's completely false.

01:01:36 They know not what they do. They don't even know that they don't hate people.

01:01:47 They only hate whatever interferes with their interests, which can't be universalized.

01:01:52 I don't know if you've ever lifted the lid and peered into the furnace heart

01:02:04 of the morally and spiritually broken among us. You ever had that experience where

01:02:16 you really, really get to see the hell that is going on in the ashen remains

01:02:24 of the shattered hearts of the evil doers among us? Have you ever? I've seen it a couple of times.

01:02:32 It's absolutely appalling. It's absolutely horrible, heartbreaking, wretched.

01:02:44 It is a pit of despair. It's dark and scary.

01:02:48 You know, probably one out of ten, one out of twenty people,

01:03:02 you know they never came back from COVID, right?

01:03:08 They stayed home and stayed alone, and not coming back.

01:03:12 It's a permanent self-exile. They're lost.

01:03:19 So if you've ever seen what goes on in the hearts of the truly broken,

01:03:32 it's a form of hysterical attacks, a sort of torrents of verbal abuse, which often is designed

01:03:46 to escalate to physical abuse by self or others, right? The sophists goad the mob into attacking

01:03:52 the truth tellers. They know it's a zero-sum game. If virtue wins, they lose. If they win,

01:04:04 virtue loses. And they're just willing to do whatever it takes. See, virtue is kind of hobbled,

01:04:08 right? Virtue is kind of hobbled because we have honesty as a core value. So we're kind of hobbled,

01:04:17 right? If you can tell the truth or lie versus you can only tell the truth,

01:04:20 well, imagine a poker game where you weren't allowed to bluff ever. You wouldn't win.

01:04:27 You wouldn't win. Imagine playing a soccer game where you couldn't fake that you were going to

01:04:37 kick somewhere. You couldn't pretend that you were going in one direction, then switch direction to

01:04:41 another. You couldn't misdirect. You couldn't do any of that. You know, one strategy that I deploy

01:04:46 in tennis is I pretend I'm going to hit really hard and then I just bink.

01:04:50 What if you had to point everywhere you were going to throw the ball?

01:04:56 In football.

01:05:00 COVID is really the most, COVID and its reactions is really the most under-processed

01:05:12 psychological event in modern times and possibly even in world history.

01:05:16 I'll do that another time.

01:05:22 Do you feel like you'll feel that this is why I'm really trying to get people to not

01:05:30 dissociate from this topic? I'm begging you, focus on what I'm saying. Because if you get it,

01:05:37 you won't believe the weight that gets lifted from your shoulders when you know it's not about you,

01:05:42 it's not personal, it's not attached to you, it could have been anyone, you were just a body in

01:05:46 the way, you have the... they have the personal relationship with you that the average boxer has

01:05:51 to a boxing bag. It's not personal. It doesn't stick with you. It's not about you. If you focus

01:06:03 on what I'm saying and you get it, you won't believe what weight will be lifted from your

01:06:13 shoulders. And how it's... what I'm saying is fundamentally not even about the past,

01:06:21 it's about the future. If you don't take the lies of evildoers seriously or personally,

01:06:31 they have no power over you.

01:06:32 They have no power over you. It's wild. It's truly wild. Because they're looking

01:06:43 for people they can infect. Okay, imagine if you were... this is an analogy, of course,

01:06:48 I'm not comparing human beings to viruses, but if you were a virus and you got to choose to infect

01:06:54 two people, you'd want to infect the person who hadn't had you before, because now he's got

01:06:58 antibodies. And if you're a virus, you want to go to the virgin flesh, not the protected flesh.

01:07:05 Yeah, maybe we'll do a donor-only post-COVID show. A lot to talk about.

01:07:13 You will be... like, when you stop taking... when you stop taking the words of evil people

01:07:26 seriously or personally, maybe seriously if there's significant danger, but you certainly

01:07:31 stop taking it personally, then you're protected. I'm trying to protect you guys from evildoers,

01:07:40 and evildoers will sniff out whether you're inoculated. And not taking it personally is

01:07:46 the ultimate inoculation. Does this make sense? There were a lot of comments, and I will get to

01:07:54 the other issue that was raised earlier. Thoughts on the Super Bowl? Thoughts on the Super Bowl?

01:08:02 Ah, giant man children chasing after pigskin on government-funded AstroTurf bullshit field.

01:08:18 Start, stop. Start, stop, start, stop. Start, stop, start. Stop. I actually went bowling

01:08:24 with my family, and I'd completely forgotten that it was Super Bowl Sunday, because

01:08:29 I'm not 12. So we went bowling, and there was Super Bowl up on the TV. Now, the commercials

01:08:37 were kind of funny. The one with Ben Affleck, Jennifer Lopez, and Matt Damon. The Dunkin'

01:08:44 Donuts one. Pretty funny. That's pretty funny. Tom Brady was in it, too. I didn't recognize him.

01:08:50 Yeah, I mean, cheering for your own tax enslavement is the business of most sports fans.

01:09:13 Yes, Steph, I think I've taken things way too personally over the years, and I allowed myself

01:09:17 to remain susceptible to the abuse, because that's how I was quote trained. Yeah, for sure.

01:09:22 Good afternoon, Liberty Garden. Welcome. Readermain.com/tonight. If you'd like to help

01:09:29 out the show, if you're listening later, come on. Tell me this ain't some absolutely fine stuff.

01:09:40 Tell me how this isn't absolutely fine stuff. Worthy of a donation or two in these troubled

01:09:51 and trying times. You can donate on the app. Readermain.com/donate. You can sign up at

01:09:58 readermain.locals.com, get access to all the goodies. You can sign up at subscribestart.com/freedomain.

01:10:06 Great stuff. And it helps. Well, it more than helps.

01:10:10 Love your enemies. Who taught me more about virtue? School or mob?

01:10:22 Who taught me more about virtue?

01:10:30 School or mob? Thank you, Eunice. I appreciate the tip.

01:10:37 Who taught you more about virtue? Your teachers or your abusers, if you had them,

01:10:46 assuming they weren't one and the same, those who harmed you or those who taught you.

01:10:51 Who taught you more about? Thank you, Existert. I appreciate that.

01:11:02 I took my dad's abuse personal because he only did it to me and not my other five siblings.

01:11:08 Ah, but he did. Ah, but he did.

01:11:11 If you're locked in a jail cell with four other people and you watch one of those people get the

01:11:20 shit beaten out of him for disobeying a guard, you think it doesn't have any effect on you?

01:11:26 He's the example. I mean, one of the reasons, of course, that I was deplatformed was so that

01:11:35 people wouldn't talk about the stuff I was talking about. They're like, "Oh, well, that's what

01:11:38 happens if you talk about the stuff Steph talked about." So it wasn't personal. It's just an

01:11:42 example. Everybody had better shut the fuck up and get in line about these topics. It's not personal.

01:11:48 My abusers didn't teach me about virtue. They taught me to be deceitful and self-destructive.

01:11:54 That's one way of looking at it.

01:11:57 That's one way to look at it.

01:12:02 McCree says, "Great stuff is always a weight lifted for sure."

01:12:16 They taught me to be deceitful and self-destructive.

01:12:18 I completely don't agree with your assessment of your own history, which I know is annoying,

01:12:25 and I'm not saying I'm right. I'm just saying I completely don't agree

01:12:28 with your assessment of your own history. Mindset is everything. How we define things is everything.

01:12:36 Let's go to what you say. "My abusers didn't teach me about virtue.

01:12:52 They taught me to be deceitful and self-destructive." Well, nonsense. Nonsense.

01:13:04 You weren't deceitful and you weren't self-destructive. You did what you fucking

01:13:08 had to do in order to survive. And if you insult yourself for that, they win,

01:13:13 and you and the truth and the world loses. You did what you had to do in order to survive.

01:13:30 "Well, I remember when I was lost in Algonquin Park and I had to eat a squirrel."

01:13:34 I didn't actually have to eat a squirrel. I was, in fact, lost in Algonquin Park, though,

01:13:39 but I had foil-wrapped Salisbury steak. Didn't have to eat a squirrel. But let's say you did

01:13:45 have to eat a squirrel. "Oh my God, I can't believe this. I had to..." You did what you

01:13:48 had to do in order to survive. Why you wouldn't give yourself a medal for that is beyond my

01:13:53 comprehension. You did what you had to do in order to survive, and guess what? You're here.

01:13:59 You made it. You made it.

01:14:04 But you're going to look back and say, "Oh, the wrongs I did in order to survive."

01:14:13 Did you want to be in that situation? Bet you didn't.

01:14:22 Did you do what you had to do in order to survive? Bet you did.

01:14:26 "I can't believe I stabbed that bear that was trying to rip my scalp off.

01:14:34 I'm never going to be a good vegan."

01:14:37 Sorry, I don't mean to laugh because it's child abuse, but holy shit, man.

01:14:43 The fuck are you doing labeling yourself with all these negative terms when you survived?

01:14:48 Two decades of child abuse.

01:14:54 Holy shit. Give yourself a fucking medal. If not a medal, at least a fucking break.

01:15:01 Of course I lied to my mother. Of course I did. "Oh, she taught me how to be deceitful." It's like,

01:15:11 "No, I lied to survive." Of course I did. If you're a Jew escaping Nazi Germany,

01:15:17 and you give false papers, "Oh, I'm so deceitful." It's like you're surviving.

01:15:23 You're surviving. Isn't that a good thing?

01:15:26 Isn't that a good thing? If you're in a situation of violence, abuse, and injustice, and you lie,

01:15:33 "I'm now branded as a liar. Oh, no." Yeah, you lied because that's how you live. Am I wrong?

01:15:43 "How dare I, as a tiger, imitate the tall grass and be dishonest about what I'm pretending to

01:15:49 be tall grass when I'm not actually tall?" Okay, yeah, you try announcing yourself and

01:15:52 see how many, how well you survive. "But when I was an adult, I was self-destructive in a peaceful way."

01:16:01 Yes. Yes. You know, when someone yells in your ear, sometimes your ear rings for a while,

01:16:08 even though they're not yelling anymore. I get you. It could take a while to overcome a bad

01:16:13 childhood, but you don't overcome it by calling yourself deceitful and self-destructive.

01:16:16 Like having to eat worms and drink your own pee when lost in a jungle. That is oddly specific.

01:16:22 "You're welcome, my friend. You're welcome."

01:16:30 Ah, God Thief says, "I can see now how I personalized what others did to me,

01:16:38 only preyed on my lack of self-esteem." God, you guys are horrible to yourself.

01:16:45 "This helps empower me in seeing I had a whole lot more power than I thought."

01:16:49 Your lack of self-esteem? What a load of crap you guys are talking tonight. Holy crap.

01:16:55 "I lack self-esteem." No, no, no, no, no, no, no. You don't lack self-esteem. Oh my God.

01:17:05 "You had to pretend to be broken so you weren't beaten." I get it. Political prisoners do it all

01:17:13 the time. People in prison do it all the time. "You had to pretend to be broken so you wouldn't

01:17:17 get beaten." Everybody does it. It's not personal. Stop insulting yourself. Stop thinking you chose

01:17:24 it. Any of it. You didn't lack self-esteem. You had to fake low self-esteem so you wouldn't get

01:17:35 beaten. "Thank you, shirtless Thief." You're welcome. Thank you for the tip. I appreciate that.

01:17:46 You know, what's the hangdog look that people in prison get? Yeah.

01:17:49 Yeah. Sure. Yeah, yeah. You have to do that because if you make eye contact and look

01:17:56 scornfully at the guards, they could beat you. "Survival is quite easy when it's only verbal

01:18:05 abuse, do you think?" Nope. The verbal abuse lasts the longest. Other than sexual abuse,

01:18:10 the verbal abuse lasts the longest because they're attempting to break you and reform you

01:18:15 in the image of their own evil through language. And we live on language.

01:18:18 I'm trying to change your brains with words. I'm trying to impact your neurons with sound waves

01:18:26 and a blinding forehead.

01:18:29 "I don't have a shirt on either," says the listener. "Hey, nipple buddies." Pressing close.

01:18:36 It's really hard to break those survival patterns and find a healthy way to exist/have boundaries.

01:18:44 Well, let me ask you this. You still breaking bread with the people who abused you? Just out

01:18:49 of curiosity. Still breaking bread, still hanging out, still doing lunch and Christmas and Thanksgiving.

01:18:54 In prison, there are a bunch of ridiculous rules you have to follow to stay on the good

01:19:00 side of the inmates/guards. But enough about public school. Yeah, of course.

01:19:07 No eye contact, look down, don't smile, don't laugh, don't sing, don't be happy, don't this. Yeah.

01:19:14 Yeah. I get it. Yeah, I get it. You ever try to be happy around an abusive parent in a bad mood?

01:19:25 You ever have that experience? You ever try to be like, just something really good happens,

01:19:30 you're just really happy and you're around an abusive parent in a foul mood. What happens?

01:19:35 No, I'm low contact, but do go back sometimes at holidays. So that would be a yes.

01:19:42 Have you quit drinking alcohol? Yes, except when I drink.

01:19:47 You know, you don't have forever to be nice to yourself because time ticks on and we're all

01:20:10 going to die. Yeah. You ever try, you're happy, you're really happy, something great, you're

01:20:15 happy, you're just, it's a great, and they're in a bad mood. And it's like, how much fun is it to

01:20:20 be happy around an abuser in a bad mood? Do you get punished for being happy? Yes. All I seem to,

01:20:28 I seem to not be able to experience happiness. There's something, no, you just, you were punished

01:20:31 for being happy when they were in a bad mood. Yeah. You get yelled at, beaten down. Yeah. Yeah.

01:20:36 Of course. Right. Go be happy somewhere else. Yeah.

01:20:40 You ever put your hand up at school and say, Hey, teach, um, could we learn maybe something

01:20:52 about the business world or how to do taxes or entrepreneurship or the economy? Or like,

01:20:58 I got to tell you this Pythagorean theorem shit. I don't know how it's ever going to help me. I

01:21:02 don't know how it's ever going to mean anything to me. Can you just teach us something that's

01:21:05 going to actually help us in our lives? What if you said that, what if you actually said what

01:21:17 we were all thinking throughout school, this is mindlessly boring. I'm never going to use this.

01:21:22 It's make work subjugation bullshit. It's an exercise of power.

01:21:30 You know, when Stalin does comedy, everybody laughs.

01:21:34 It's an exercise of power to inflict boredom on people is an exercise of power, which is why

01:21:45 bad parents tend to be so boring. It's an exercise of power. Hey, I can't get away.

01:21:55 We win you lose. When will we use this in real life? My classmates every day. Yeah. Every day,

01:22:02 every day. We're looking at the blackboard going, what the fuck is this? I don't care. Oh,

01:22:08 the difference between mitosis and meiosis. That's really good. It got me in handy when

01:22:12 I want to start a business and pay property taxes. So being boring is an exercise of power.

01:22:24 Which is why you know how much I reject power because I'm really trying to be interesting

01:22:28 while challenging. I asked my math teacher, there's someone who was an old guy once. When will

01:22:36 we be using this? He looked at me and said, focus on your work, right? It's an exercise in power.

01:22:40 I don't have to be useful because I got power over you. I can fail you. So I don't have to

01:22:47 enlighten you. I mastered the art of looking at my phone under the table without the teacher

01:22:53 noticing. Probably thought you were just obsessed with your own genitals, but hey,

01:22:57 we all were. I mean by your genitals. Zim says any time I'd show some enthusiasm about something,

01:23:04 parents would always try to stop belittling me in overt and covert ways to get me to lose interest.

01:23:08 Yeah. God forbid you'd be happy among the Moriohs. I'm not sure I'd be happy among the

01:23:15 Moriohs. Among the Moriah minds of the miserable. God forbid. God help you if you're happy around

01:23:22 the miserable. They will make you pay. Someone says I only saw practical math when I went back

01:23:31 to upgrade my education for community college. Okay. I don't know what any of that means,

01:23:40 but I'm sure it's important to someone. So what did he say? The only entrepreneurs who came

01:23:54 through the school were the most depressing guy. He was super regretful about missing his

01:23:58 children's toddler years. Right. So they would choose you to scare you away from entrepreneurship.

01:24:05 Right. Yeah. If you were happy, says James, they would growl. Wipe that smile off your face.

01:24:12 Right. Dave says I feel I'm too broken to escape my parents' influence. I don't interview well.

01:24:19 Oh, Dave.

01:24:25 Quick question. This is for everyone. A quick question. If Dave says I feel I'm too broken

01:24:35 to escape my parents' influence, I don't interview well.

01:24:38 Do those feelings serve either A. Dave or B. his parents?

01:24:46 Do those feelings serve either A. Dave or B.

01:24:52 his parents? Are they even Dave's feelings? Patriotism as a whole, not loyalty to virtue,

01:25:03 but loyalty to the government. Does that serve either A. the people or B. the people in power?

01:25:08 How do you even know they're your feelings or not things that are implanted in you

01:25:17 for the convenience of those who rule over you?

01:25:19 Is it convenient to your parents that you feel too broken to escape their influence?

01:25:28 I bet it does. And so it may not even be your feelings.

01:25:33 My favorite part of school was lunch break. Anyone else agree?

01:25:40 Zim says I used to show up to school incredibly early and watch the sun come up over the distant

01:25:45 mountains by myself or sometimes with a close friend. That was my favorite time, I think. Yeah,

01:25:48 so the only thing that was good about school was when it wasn't school. And if it was something

01:25:53 else, I had fun in school in doing sports. And a couple of times towards the end of school,

01:26:04 when there was nothing else to teach you, I remember we would go maybe for the last day,

01:26:09 and they'd divide the class into the boys and the girls, and there'd be trivia contests and

01:26:14 skill contests. And it was a blast. And we actually learned some cool things through the

01:26:18 trivia. It was so much fun. And of course, whenever you have fun at school, and occasionally it would

01:26:22 happen, you'd be like, "Damn, why don't we do this all the time? Shouldn't we be doing this more?"

01:26:28 I liked rugby in school, tennis, water polo team, swim team.

01:26:51 I liked soccer after school, frisbee in the quad at lunch.

01:26:55 Yeah, I feel they're not encouraging of me to create a family because my dad fell silent when

01:27:01 I said I was flirting with a woman on the train rather than saying, "Go on, my son," or something

01:27:05 similar. Yeah. Yeah, so your parents, like if they're neglectful or abusive parents,

01:27:11 your parents are terrified that you're going to meet a quality person who's going to say,

01:27:15 "What the hell have these people done to you? Holy crap, I care about you, and they've really

01:27:20 wrecked you, so boy, I'm not friendly towards them. The last thing they want is for you to

01:27:25 have an ally. Kind of tough to bully people when they have allies. And all the people who don't

01:27:33 love you but merely exploit you have one thing, and one thing that is their greatest terror,

01:27:39 always and forevermore, Amen. And that is if you ever step into the golden hallelujah light

01:27:45 of being truly loved, the whole scam and gig and con and exploitation is up. It's all done.

01:27:53 Everybody's exploitation of you hangs by a tiny little silver thread, and what cuts that thread

01:28:01 is genuinely being loved. And I tell you this from intense, vivid, 21-year, 22-year now,

01:28:09 personal experience. And so, exploitation, the exploiters have to inoculate you against love,

01:28:22 which is why love is so scary, why love is so dangerous, why you stumble and stutter

01:28:29 Horace Wimp style, because if you're loved, the haters will lose you.

01:28:36 All the abusers are doing is rendering you, as much as they possibly can,

01:28:47 unlovable to a good person, so that good people don't come into their orbit and fucking free you.

01:28:58 That's the simple mechanics of it. No bullshit, straight up, for real, for real. That's the whole

01:29:03 gig. You can't be loved, or you'll stop obeying them. You can't be loved, or you won't be exploited.

01:29:20 So this is why, if you ever start talking about a really good woman or man,

01:29:27 they're down, they're negative. Count up that shit around, man.

01:29:32 If you're making your father a fortune in business, and he's paying you virtually nothing,

01:29:42 right? He's paying you 25 grand a year, and he's making a million dollars a year from you.

01:29:50 Does he want you to go to a recruiter? Does he want you to look up what you're worth?

01:29:56 Does he ever want you to say, "Oh, dad, you know, I met this woman on the train today."

01:30:05 It's the weirdest thing. "I met this woman on the train today. She's actually a professional

01:30:08 recruiter. And she was kind of curious. And so I told her about my experience, and I told her how

01:30:14 long I've been working for you. I told her the kind of stuff that I do." And she's actually,

01:30:21 I mean, it's just kind of goofy, right? I mean, but I just thought it'd be interesting. So she

01:30:25 really wants to see my resume. She says she knows a couple of people who might be interested in what

01:30:30 I do. Now, of course, I love working for you and all of that. But I think I'm just going to send

01:30:36 him my resume. Well, what's your dad going to say if he's ripping you off? What's he going to say

01:30:45 if you're going to send your resume to a professional, professional recruiter or head

01:30:48 hunter? What's he going to say? "Don't do that. That's a scam. It's bullshit. She's lying to you.

01:30:53 She's probably just going to try and steal money from your bank account. You know what? You know,

01:30:57 if you really, give me your resume. I'm sure, I mean, give me your resume. I'll hand it to a

01:31:02 friend of mine and you'll get the straight goods. Last thing he's going to want you to do is to try

01:31:06 and figure out your value in the marketplace when he's ripping you off. Hide to hair."

01:31:12 Because if you send the resume in, right? You send your resume in and this woman's like,

01:31:22 "Holy shit. You're fantastic, man. I can get you a job pulling half a mil easy." Like you're

01:31:29 literally making a million dollars. Anybody would be happy to get you for, pay you half a mil.

01:31:33 They'll keep the other half. Be like, "Wait a minute. My dad's paying me 25,000. You're saying

01:31:40 I'm worth half a million? Like 20 times more? Fuck. No, no bullshit. 20 times more.

01:31:56 You can get me 20 times the pay my own father is giving me."

01:32:01 Well, your dad kind of likes ripping you off for almost a million dollars a year.

01:32:12 He doesn't want you to figure out what you're actually worth.

01:32:21 You know it's the same with love, right?

01:32:23 Ah.

01:32:27 He knows that the gig is up.

01:32:37 "Ah, you don't want to use recruiters? They'll rip you off, son.

01:32:41 Stay with me. You really want to work for some stranger? Yeah, yeah, yeah."

01:32:47 "Stay with me. You really want to work for some stranger? Yeah, yeah, yeah."

01:32:50 Now, you understand he can't have you talk to the recruiter.

01:32:55 He cannot at all afford to have you talk to the recruiter. And it's not just about the million

01:33:03 because if you go to the recruiter

01:33:07 and the recruiter says, "I can get you a job for half a million dollars,"

01:33:14 your relationship with your father, you're not just quitting your job with your father.

01:33:17 You're not just quitting your job with your father. Your entire relationship will detonate

01:33:30 with your father because now you have to look and say, "Guy's been ripping me off for 10 years

01:33:33 straight." And you'll understand why your father was desperately, was desperate for you not to

01:33:39 talk to a recruiter. Because you talk to a recruiter, you'll find out your dad's been ripping

01:33:44 you off. Done. He can't have you go to the recruiter, whatever he has to do. Now, maybe you

01:33:53 say, "Ah, well, what he'll do?" You say, "What he'll do is really cool. He'll just give me a huge

01:33:57 raise." And it's like, "No, that's not going to work because that's an admission that he was

01:34:01 underpaying you before. He can't do that either. All he can do is fuck you up."

01:34:09 So, what does your dad do? You say, "Hey, dad, I got a meeting with the recruiter

01:34:15 Friday at lunch. I'm going to go see the recruiter Friday at lunch."

01:34:21 Right. What's your dad going to do? Come on, people. Not talking about old fathers,

01:34:27 just talking about a really nasty guy, really nasty, evil dad. What's your dad going to do?

01:34:31 You got a Friday, you got to meet with the recruiter. And he knows you're going to find

01:34:36 out what you're actually worth. And you might even sue him. I don't know, whatever. But his

01:34:42 business is toast. His income is toast. His money is toast. His relationship with you is toast.

01:34:46 And you're going to badmouth him to friends, to family. You're going to be shocked and appalled.

01:34:51 He's going to get ostracized. He's going to lose his business. His wife might divorce him.

01:34:54 What's he going to do? Oh, you know how those people are. You're wasting your time. No,

01:34:59 that's not evil enough. That's not evil enough.

01:35:03 What does your father do? The recruiter is going to lie to you. "No,

01:35:14 you guys are too nice. Throw obstacles in the way." What is he going to do?

01:35:18 You're fired if you do? "No."

01:35:26 I think there's a good chance he will ignore it and not give advice. "No. I love you guys

01:35:30 because you're not exploiters." What's he going to do? Ask you to do some shit that's all of a

01:35:35 sudden important on that day? Maybe. Maybe. Belittle him and tell him he's not good enough.

01:35:44 Now you're getting somewhere. So he's going to grind down your confidence, right?

01:35:48 What else is he going to do? Because he can't have you show up to that interview

01:35:52 and be likable. Call the recruiter and say you're a terrible employee. Now you're getting somewhere.

01:35:59 Now you're getting somewhere. Increase your hours to get in the way of the interview. Yeah,

01:36:02 he could schedule some big meeting, but that's just postponing things, right? Yeah. He's going

01:36:05 to call up the recruiter and he's going to say, "So listen, my son's been talking about you.

01:36:09 I have to tell you. He's, you know, I don't know how to put this because it's a difficult

01:36:18 conversation. Of course I love my son, but I really do have to be honest with you. I mean,

01:36:22 for liability reasons, as well as just, I think, business courtesy. He has, I mean, it's not a

01:36:31 little bit of a drug problem. It's not a huge drug problem. We've been really, really trying

01:36:34 to help him. I've paid for his rehab. Gosh, what is it now? Six, no, seven times. I paid for his

01:36:40 rehab seven times and you know, he's been clean for, oh, I mean, actually keep the two, two,

01:36:49 two months and 13 days because you have to, right? Cause, and this is the longest he's been clean

01:36:53 for a while. So we're optimistic, but it's, it's a, it's a risk. Now he'll deny this of course.

01:37:00 And, but that's part of the issue. The other thing too, and the reason why I employ him and nobody

01:37:06 else will is because over the course of his drug habit and yeah, it really is my fault for leaving

01:37:13 cash around, but he did, he, he embezzled honestly. And we're not pressing charges because

01:37:20 we care about him probably too much. We're probably too nice, but you know, if you've

01:37:23 been a parent, you'll, you'll know. Right. Also when he was on drugs, we ended up with two lawsuits

01:37:33 from women that he propositioned in, I mean, I say proposition, he basically just groped,

01:37:39 cornered and not exactly assaulted, but they felt extremely uncomfortable and we had to deal with

01:37:45 that. Pathological liar, of course, again, I don't blame him. I blame the drugs. And, you know,

01:37:51 hopefully if he's, he just did this stuff, right? What else will he do? Oh, yes. If you ever go to

01:38:02 a recruiter, I will cut you out of my life forever. You don't realize how kind I've been taking you on

01:38:06 despite the losses. Yes, but that's risky. What else is he going to do?

01:38:15 Let's say that you're living at his house. What else is he going to do?

01:38:26 Well, he's going to get you drunk the night before. He's going to pull you out, get you drunk.

01:38:34 He's going to make sure you don't get any good sleep and he's going to hide your deodorant and

01:38:39 shaving cream in the morning. The insanity of this is beyond me. God, I feel innocent in this,

01:38:49 to this kind of evil. There is, this is reminding me of other people I've had in my life that in

01:38:57 retrospect have pulled this kind of shit with me. What else is he going to do? Well, he's going to

01:39:05 hide your car keys or maybe even sabotage your car. He's going to be unable to drive you.

01:39:11 And he's going to ask a client to call you with a problem so that you're jangled,

01:39:18 tired, exhausted, hungover, whatever. So that you don't come across well. If he can't get you,

01:39:27 I mean, he'll try everything to get you to not go to the recruiter. Now you understand the recruiter

01:39:33 is someone who loves you. It's your person. It's the love of your life, the light of your life.

01:39:38 Right? I mean, at the extreme ends, he'll call in threats to the building of the recruiter so that

01:39:50 everything empties out when you're in the interview. Yeah, he'll badmouth you to other

01:39:55 family members. Like, cause the guy's facing, like, you know what people like, let's say he's

01:40:00 underpaying you by half a million dollars a year, 10 years, that's $5 million that he's made from

01:40:06 you. People will do a lot to keep the gravy train going. And emotionally they'll do even more.

01:40:12 Sometimes they're materially. He will keep me in a beautiful home in a nice area, mostly alone to

01:40:17 kill my motivation. Yeah. Isolate you for sure. Absolutely. And just put you down.

01:40:24 Oops. Someone washed your white shirts with colored towels the night before. Yeah.

01:40:27 Okay. I've got no underwear and can't find one shoe. Honestly, people will do a lot. You know,

01:40:34 people will kill for $50. You don't think you'll get sabotaged for 5 million? Oh, come on.

01:40:41 Got to wake up to what evil people do, man. Sorry. Like you just got to wake up to what evil people

01:40:48 do. I mean, if, if the past eight years haven't taught you that, I don't know what to tell you.

01:40:57 And it doesn't stop there. Right? You understand it doesn't stop there because if you get through

01:41:07 all of this, you get the job, then you're going to go for another interview for someone who might

01:41:11 pay you half a million dollars a year. Then that person gets a phone call and then you also get

01:41:16 drugged or drunk or, or your car is, is, uh, can't find your car keys. And then you,

01:41:21 that interview is a problem. Like you understand he just wants to keep you.

01:41:25 So he'll sabotage someone who's going to take you away from that. And again, we're talking,

01:41:30 you know, this is not of course common and this is not average for child abusers, but

01:41:35 he's going to attack you so hard. You're going to be too crippled to even go to the interview

01:41:39 and perform on the job. Right. You're going to go in there, shell shocked, uh, you know,

01:41:45 um, a woman who, uh, doesn't want, she uses more common for women, men do this too, but it's more

01:41:50 common for women. I think if you are a dating a woman, you're living together with a woman,

01:41:55 you're married to a woman. And then she feels that you're going to do something. That's going

01:41:59 to be going to be take you out of her orbit. Like you're going to do, you're going to get some great

01:42:03 job. You're going to get some big promotion. You're going to be stopped moving in new circles.

01:42:06 If she feels that your upgrade is going to have you look at her and say, I can do better.

01:42:10 She'll just pick a fight with you the night before. So you're exhausted and stressed and

01:42:16 weirded out by the time you get to the interview so that you don't end up succeeding. And then

01:42:19 looking at her, like I can do better than you. Your people sabotage you continually to keep

01:42:25 you down at their level. People attack you continuously to keep you down at their level.

01:42:33 It's brutal. Until, until you find that one person who just loves you. And then the whole

01:42:46 gig is up. All the lies are gone. All the appeal is gone. All the attraction is gone.

01:42:52 All the hold is gone. Everything is gone. And that's why those who exploit you are so desperate

01:43:04 to ensure that you'll never be loved. That you're not good enough. Nobody cares about you. You're

01:43:11 not attractive enough. You're kind of a loser. You're an embarrassment. You have low self-esteem.

01:43:16 They'll just keep crippling you. It's like hobbling a slave or breeding cows to be subservient and not

01:43:26 fighty. I mean, tell me if I'm wrong. If you feel this is too harsh, I'm happy to hear. I'm happy

01:43:34 to, if I'm being unjust or unfair, I'm of course always happy to hear. I mean, you're going to have

01:43:41 a tough time talking me out of things I've directly perceived myself, but I'm... How do you know if

01:43:53 you're genuinely unhappy or just being sabotaged for the sake of exploitation? Yeah. And then they

01:44:02 boast about how they were further ahead in their lives at your stage. Yeah. Which of course is

01:44:07 your job to make your kids do better than you, right? Help them. How do you know what's yours?

01:44:12 And how do you know what's just sabotage? How do you know what you think and feel versus what's

01:44:15 implanted in you to keep you controlled? How do you know? I mean, if you were to read some diary

01:44:25 of a slave in ancient Egypt, and the slave is like, "I'm just worthless. I don't have any

01:44:31 initiative. I just... I can't get anything done just for myself. I guess I'm just messed up."

01:44:38 You'd be like, "No, you're just... A lot of the things my parents did suddenly make sense." I'm

01:44:43 not saying it's conscious, but it doesn't really matter. It's even worse in a sense if it's

01:44:45 unconscious. But yeah, that's how the game is played. Fair but dark. Sabotage has been pretty

01:44:52 constant. Yeah. Yep. If people don't want to improve, they will fight your improvement.

01:45:05 If people gain resources from your low self-esteem, they will create and inflict upon

01:45:13 you low self-esteem. If people can exploit you because you're not loved, they're more than happy

01:45:20 to sacrifice you being loved for them being able to continue to exploit you.

01:45:25 It's my fault, though. I should have been more willing to be critical towards other

01:45:32 people's behavior rather than making excuses for them.

01:45:34 Oh, it's my fault. See, this is just more programming,

01:45:42 though. I mean, you can say all this crap if you want. My fault.

01:45:44 I'm sorry.

01:45:51 This is what's funny. And you'll get this comedy, right? A person says, "It's my fault,

01:45:55 though. I should have been more willing to be critical towards other people's behavior rather

01:45:58 than making excuses for them." It's my fault. I should have been more willing to be critical of

01:46:02 others. You understand? But by saying it's your fault, you're avoiding being critical of others.

01:46:06 You're literally self-detonating your entire argument and everything that you say.

01:46:10 I should have been more critical of my parents. It's my fault. Do you not see that? This is the

01:46:15 mark of occupation, being occupied by a foreign army of the exploitation of others. I should

01:46:25 have been more critical of other people. I'm bad for not doing that. Sorry, I don't mean to laugh,

01:46:32 but oh my god. Oh my god. Hurtus would put a small nick in an animal's leg to make them lame

01:46:43 if they could not run away after. Yeah, for sure. You don't have to build a fence if you can cripple

01:46:49 the animals. It makes me realize how not having anything but virtue in your life and those who

01:46:55 surround you in your life are more than just nice words to say. I'm trying to drop down a rope to

01:47:02 get you out of the well. Because parents should, if anything, offer the basics materially to

01:47:08 encourage motivation. Anything more is sabotage. It's not about what you provide materially. It's

01:47:13 about what you provide psychologically. You should celebrate your children doing better than you.

01:47:18 My daughter is wiser in some ways than I am. I'm 57. She's 15 years old. That is great.

01:47:29 I'm not saying it's not startling from time to time. It certainly is, but it's great.

01:47:33 I don't want my daughter to have to wait till she's in her 30s to be loved. That's not a lot of fun.

01:47:43 All right, shit time, and then I'll finish the question from earlier. And come on, guys,

01:47:49 give me a tip. This is such good work. This is such great stuff. This is so,

01:47:54 so good that you pretty much owe me a tip at this point. Sorry to be frank,

01:47:59 but if you're listening to this later, freedomain.com/donate, this

01:48:01 is me turning myself inside out to help you with decades of embitterly grabbed wisdom.

01:48:07 I don't often demand, but when I've earned, I will.

01:48:21 Does your DNA survive through love or does it survive through hate?

01:48:23 That's the guy. Yeah, that's the same guy.

01:48:26 Listen, man, you should not be here. You should be working at the fortune cookie,

01:48:32 fortune cookie factory. That's where you need to be.

01:48:36 Thank you, Sam. I appreciate that. Thank you.

01:48:40 That's the average middle class family falling in love in their 30s with a lifelong partner. Yeah,

01:48:48 better if sooner though, right? Better sooner. All right, I'll just wait and see if any tips

01:48:57 are coming in, and then I'll finish with the very serious and painful question earlier.

01:49:06 A listener wrote about miscarriage, and he was saying that he and his partner

01:49:24 have undergone a miscarriage, and they are, of course, very unhappy about that. I really

01:49:34 sympathize. I mean, beyond words, without getting into details, I feel you, brother. I really feel

01:49:40 you, and I'm so sorry. That is very tough. That is very tough to go through, and it is,

01:49:47 sadly, very common. Was it 25%, 30% like a pregnancy and a miscarriage? This is one of

01:49:55 the reasons why a lot of people don't talk about the miscarriage, being pregnant, until they pass

01:50:00 a certain number of weeks, 12 weeks or whatever it is. So I'm really, really sorry. I'm really

01:50:07 sorry, and there's no way to just, you know, there's no machinations that will erase that pain,

01:50:14 but I will tell you this, that the people I've talked to who've gone through miscarriages,

01:50:18 wow, are they powerfully bonded to their children because they don't take it for granted.

01:50:23 They realize the fragility of pregnancy, the uncertain dice roll of achieving life,

01:50:30 they love their kids even more. They're even more attached to their kids. They take even greater

01:50:35 pleasure in their kids because they know how things can go so badly wrong. They are overjoyed

01:50:42 and even further bonded when things go right. Now, that's a really tough thing to hear and even to

01:50:49 talk about when you're in the depths of unhappiness, which again, I completely sympathize with,

01:50:52 understand, regarding what's happening at the moment and saying, "Well, you know, when you

01:50:58 have kids, I get, but I'm telling you that this will be the case. This will be the case.

01:51:04 You will love the children that you have all the more because of the one that didn't make it."

01:51:16 And it is like a little death. Well, it is a little death. There is a grieving process.

01:51:26 It's very abstract, of course, because you don't see the baby other than maybe the little

01:51:32 Wacka Wacka Pac-Man on the monitor, but it nonetheless was a family member who didn't

01:51:37 make it and it's very sad. And you can have rituals, you can have flowers, you can have

01:51:42 poetry, you can have symbols to mark the loss in your heart.

01:51:52 But the gravestones, in a sense, do help us deeply appreciate the cribs all the more. The deaths,

01:52:01 that is why life is here, helps us deeply appreciate the life that we achieve and we have.

01:52:11 I had, between my brother and myself, there was a half-sister who was my mother carried all the way

01:52:17 and was stillborn. And she only wanted two, so my life is the result of her death. Her death was a

01:52:24 domino that caused me to spring up from nothing. So, the sorrow obviously is important and essential,

01:52:36 but we talked about how hatred is the shadow of doing virtue. Joy is the shadow of doing virtue.

01:52:48 Joy is enhanced by suffering. I mean, I wrote about this in my novel, The Present,

01:52:57 about Rachel's father, who got a text saying that he had a very serious form of cancer. It turns out

01:53:03 that the text was sent by mistake. And he found that out. He got the text Friday night and he

01:53:10 found out about it Monday. How sweet was that Monday? How sweet was that Monday, because he

01:53:22 feared he was dying for three days straight. Now, of course, we don't pursue disaster in order to

01:53:29 achieve happiness, but we can absolutely slingshot or judo disaster

01:53:36 into a greater depth than appreciation. Think how even more overjoyed you will be to have a child

01:53:48 after having a miscarriage. And I'm not saying this to erase the sadness at all, because I don't

01:53:53 believe in that. I don't believe that you just scrub sadness out of your soul by gaslighting

01:53:57 yourself into saying somehow there's good that can come out of it, although there is. We still

01:54:01 don't want it to happen, but you know, bad shit is just going to happen in life. Life is a fucking

01:54:07 dice roll over a volcano. Life is tap dancing through a fucking landmine all day, every day,

01:54:15 sometimes it seems. Bad shit happens all the time. All the time. People get sick. People die.

01:54:22 Financial disasters. People get fired. COVID. Bad shit happens all the time. People's

01:54:31 savings evaporate in scams. Bad shit happens all the time in life.

01:54:35 And either it grinds you down or you slingshot it into a greater appreciation of when the shit

01:54:44 isn't rolling down the hill. Must be a king. How do you know? He doesn't have shit all over him.

01:54:50 It's a good day. Nothing bad happened. It's a good day. Nothing bad happened.

01:54:59 Would it be as good a day if nothing bad had ever happened? Nope. I'll take the valleys in life. I

01:55:06 absolutely will take the valleys in life, but I'll fucking use them to get to the heights. I'm like,

01:55:12 slingshot up. Slingshot up. As opposed to crater and auger in.

01:55:23 I, as you know, I'm a healthy guy. No risk factors. 10 years ago or whenever, I just got

01:55:31 cancer. Why? There's never any answer. I know that as a victim of severe child abuse that I have a

01:55:38 higher risk of these things. Maybe it was just that. And I'm like, first of all, I'm just not

01:55:47 going to let it kill me. I'm just not going to let it kill me. I had a new baby. And secondly,

01:55:54 I'm going to be so fucking healthy, it's going to be insane.

01:55:58 I'm going to work out eight hours a week. I'm going to lose weight.

01:56:06 I'm going to not sit at a desk doing shows all the time. I'm going to walk.

01:56:16 People don't need to see my face when I'm doing a call-in show. How many people watch two and a

01:56:19 half hour call-in shows for my reactions? I'm going to walk around because it's better for me.

01:56:24 I'm going to get sunlight. I take care of my teeth. Go to the dentist like three times a year.

01:56:33 Slingshot that bad luck into a better outcome.

01:56:44 Bad stuff is going to happen, man.

01:56:46 Bad stuff is going to happen. And your choice about what you do with the bad stuff

01:56:54 is the fundamental definition of the happiness of your life.

01:56:58 You know, women broke up with me. I broke up with women.

01:57:04 All of that led me to my wife. Thank you to everyone who broke up with me and to everyone

01:57:11 I broke up with. Sorry it was tough at the time. Man, did it lead to a better place.

01:57:15 When I quit my career to start this show, very shortly thereafter, I was savaged by the mainstream

01:57:23 media. So I'm like, okay, well, now I'm in. Now I'm committed. Now, I mean, there's no turning

01:57:32 back. Right? So, okay, I'm digging it. What choice do you have? You have no choice about whether bad

01:57:38 things are going to happen to you or not. Spoiler, they will. Bad things will happen to you. Sometimes

01:57:44 you screw up. A lot of times it's just bad luck. Bad things are going to happen to you.

01:57:49 That's a given. That's a fact. That cannot be changed.

01:57:54 What you do with those bad things is all that matters. There is no bulletproof life.

01:58:05 There is no disaster-free life, but there's no greater disaster than letting the disasters rob

01:58:10 you of happiness when they don't have to. When they can in fact bring you greater and deeper joy.

01:58:16 That's how you say, "Fuck you" to the inevitable catastrophes of the world. You just say, "I'm

01:58:22 going to take that shit and turn it into gold. I'm going to take that coal dust that's supposed

01:58:26 to fuck up my lungs. I'm going to turn it into a diamond I wear on my head. I'm going to take

01:58:32 a diamond I wear on my finger with pride. I am going to take this sadness. After a while,

01:58:43 I'll be sad. I'm going to take the sadness. I'm going to scoop it up. I'm going to turn it into

01:58:48 the breath god of golden love. I'm going to use it on my future children. I'm going to take the

01:58:54 sorrow, harden it into love and apply it even more to my future children." If you don't love your

01:59:04 kids so much that they're rolling their eyes at you in their teens, you haven't loved them enough.

01:59:08 So I can't take away into the sadness, of course, and I wouldn't want to. That's part of life.

01:59:14 You can't make it good that bad things happen to you, but you can make yourself as grateful

01:59:21 as possible that you learned as much as possible from them. I can't go back in time and give

01:59:27 myself a happy childhood, but I sure as hell can. Get as much virtue out of that shit fest

01:59:35 as humanly possible and hopefully, just hopefully, help others with it too.

01:59:39 So I hope that helps. Thank you everyone so much for dropping by tonight. It's always a

01:59:49 great and deep pleasure. I did tell myself I'm continually focusing on being unrestrained.

01:59:56 Apparently, I'm sure it is as well. I'm continually focused on being unrestrained.

01:59:59 I hope that I'm getting there. I still have a lot further to go in terms of self-expression,

02:00:04 so I hope you'll continue to join me on the journey as I uncork more of my language

02:00:09 capacities and clarification capacities, passion and humor, love, caring, and support.

02:00:16 I love you guys so much for being here and supporting what it is that we do. We,

02:00:21 right? Jared and James and myself, what we're doing up here. I really love you guys

02:00:25 for coming by and supporting. If you're listening to this later,

02:00:30 freedomain.com/donate. Yeah, Dave, I'll send you the recording. freedomain.com/donate.

02:00:36 Really, really do appreciate your time. You love your care and attention. Lots of love, everyone.

02:00:40 Take care. Bye.

02:00:42 [END]

Category

Transcript

Recommended