• 10 months ago
A woman says she chose to be childfree after seeing how hard her mum worked to raise her sister – and suggests having kids is a "want not a need".

Evi Nardi, 35, was just nine when her mum, Lili, 54, fell pregnant with her sister, Laura, 26, and saw the “hard work” that went into being a mother.

Her decision to not have children was further solidified when she was a counsellor during college – aged 23.

Now Evi and her partner, Alex, 29, have been travelling on and off for the past year – visiting cities across the world such as London, Barcelona, Nashville, Montreal and Las Vegas.

She says being childfree allows her to have a “lack of structure” and believes having children is a “want not a need”.

Evi, a content creator, originally from Venezuela, South America, said: “When I was nine I had a sister. I remember being scared.

“I saw my mum struggling with her health and it was the first reality check.

“When she was born I helped a lot – I was so excited. I started to notice it was hard work.

“College became hands on. It solidified the idea that having kids was not for me.

“Why would I go and put myself in a box by having kids?

“I’ll never regret not having kids.”

By aged 26, Evi had the “financial freedom” to do more of what she wanted and knew she would never have children.

She met Alex, who works in technology, two years ago and found they were on the same page.

Despite being told “it was just a phase” and she’d “regret” not having children, Evi is very “happy” with her choice.

She now spends her days having slow mornings, taking long walks around the city she is in and enjoying bars and restaurants.

Evi said: “I get to have a different day every day.

“If I had kids I’d have to give up that lack of structure.”

Evi says she constantly has strangers online calling her “selfish” online for not wanting children.

She said: “Having kids has been seen as this selfless endeavour.

“As a woman you give up your body for nine months.

“I get how the notion is selfless but you ask people why they are having children and they say ‘I want one’.”

“It’s a want not a need.

“It’s oddly seen as selfless but in reality it’s a choice.”

Evi loves being able to put her partner first and put their quality time first – something she feels she wouldn’t be able to do if there was a child involved.

Evi said: “Having that ability to have that quality time is great.”

The couple hope to eventually settle down in north America and adopt pets.

Evi hopes sharing her childfree and happy lifestyle will help others who feel the same as well as those who can’t have children through circumstance.

She said: “You can be happy even if kids are not a part of your life.”

Follow Evi on Instagram @childfreebff

Category

😹
Fun
Transcript
00:00 We're child-free adults. We wake up naturally on weekends and enjoy sipping our coffee in bed.
00:06 We're child-free adults. Our pets have human names, middle names, last names, and a bunch of nicknames.
00:14 We're child-free adults. Our family loves to ask us, "When are we going to have kids? When are we going to settle down?"
00:20 But we just answer with, "That's not for me."
00:23 We're child-free adults. We love to travel on the wind, go explore on the weekends, or maybe do nothing at all.
00:31 I feel like women have a lot of choices these days, and choosing to be a parent is just simply not one that I want to make.
00:41 I think that being a parent requires a very high level of commitment that I'm simply not willing to make.
00:47 You know, I think that everybody should make the best choice for them, regardless if that means having kids or not having kids.
00:54 Honestly, financially, it does not make sense for me at all.
00:58 I feel very fulfilled and content with where my life is now to add on something like having a child.
01:07 The thought of pregnancy terrifies me to my core, and I have no interest in that, nor what comes after.
01:14 I've been around a lot of kids, and although I don't mind them at all,
01:20 carrying a baby on is simply not in the cards for me.
01:24 This choice has been made, and it is not really up for discussion right now with you. Thanks.
01:30 Oh my god, but what are you going to do with your time?
01:37 Who's going to take care of you when you're old?
01:40 No man is going to want to be with you.
01:43 Why? You can't?
01:45 You know, if you can't, there's a bunch of treatments out there nowadays.
01:49 I have this friend, she couldn't get pregnant for like three years, and now she has twins.
01:54 You can always freeze your eggs, because if you change your mind, that way you have them there.
02:00 You would be such a good mom.
02:03 You don't want a mini me?
02:05 Oh, your babies would be so cute.
02:08 You know, women are meant to have babies, right?
02:12 So, sooner or later it's going to hit you. It's going to hit you. It's coming.
02:16 You're way too young. You're going to change your mind.
02:19 And I'm sure I'm missing some, but let me tell you something crazy.
02:24 Not everyone wants to have kids, and we've heard it all.
02:29 So, I love when people say, "Oh, you're going to regret not having kids."
02:34 But they forget one thing. You cannot regret something that you never wanted.
02:39 [ Silence ]

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