TV-G | 30min | Comedy, Drama, Family, Music, TV Series | Episode aired 22 September 1965
Patty needs to have her tonsils removed and her surgeon just so happens to look like Troy Donahue, much to Patty's delight.
Director: Bruce Bilson
Writers: Theodore Ferro, Mathilde Ferro, Sidney Sheldon, William Asher
Stars: Patty Duke, William Schallert, Jean Byron
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:00Good morning, hello, I'm Mrs. Lane, my daughter Patty is Dr. Fenneman's patient.
00:24Oh, yes.
00:25Dr. Morgan will be with you in a moment, won't you sit down?
00:29Would you relax and stop worrying?
00:33I'm not worried, Mom, I'm just embarrassed, having your tonsils out at my age, the kids
00:37at school will think I'm some kind of nut, it's just embarrassing.
00:40For goodness sake, Patty.
00:41Besides, if I take time out from school, my work will suffer.
00:45You can make it up.
00:46How can you make up missing a class dance?
00:48Mom, can't I have them out later when it's more convenient?
00:52Like when?
00:54During finals it would be more convenient.
00:56Besides, there's nothing wrong with me, I just have a silly sore throat.
01:04Would Dr. Fenneman send you to a surgeon if it was just a little sore throat?
01:07It's tonsillitis.
01:08Mom, you're making a big deal over nothing.
01:11It hardly hurts at all.
01:15Mrs. Lane?
01:16I'm Dr. Morgan.
01:18How do you do?
01:21This is Patty.
01:24How do you feel?
01:27Patty, Patty Lane.
01:30How's your throat?
01:33Oh, oh it's awful.
01:36Simply excruciating.
01:39Maybe you'd better go inside and rest a little.
01:42Oh, thank you.
01:45Maybe you'd better go inside and I'll take a look at you.
01:48♪
01:53Don't be alarmed, through these portals
01:55pass some of the greatest actresses in the world.
01:57Excuse me.
02:01♪
02:05♪ Meet Kathy who's lived most everywhere
02:08♪ From Zanzibar to Barclays Square
02:11♪ But Patty's only seen the sights a girl can see
02:14♪ From Brooklyn Heights
02:15♪ What a crazy pair
02:17♪ But they're cousins
02:20♪ Identical cousins all the way
02:24♪ One pair of matching bookends
02:28♪ Different as night and day
02:30♪ Where Kathy adores a minuet
02:34♪ The ballet Russe and crepe Suzette
02:37♪ Our Patty loves her rock and roll
02:38♪ A hot dog makes her lose control
02:41♪ What a wild duet
02:42♪ Still they're cousins
02:45♪ Identical cousins
02:47♪ Then you'll find
02:50♪ They laugh a lot, they walk a lot
02:51♪ At times they even talk a lot
02:53♪ You can lose your mind
02:56♪ When cousins
02:58♪ Are two of a kind
03:01♪
03:07I get the feeling you're not too thrilled
03:08about having your tonsils removed.
03:10Whatever gave you that idea?
03:11Dr. Finneman told me about you.
03:13Well, he didn't tell me about you.
03:15Why don't you sit down and we'll take a look.
03:17Aside from your throat, have you had any other symptoms?
03:20Hot and cold and a little dizzy.
03:23When did that start?
03:24A couple of minutes ago.
03:26You can sit back and relax.
03:29All right, open up and say, ah.
03:30Ah.
03:32Well, I'm not crazy about what I see.
03:34I am.
03:42You can close your mouth now.
03:45How old are you, Patty?
03:47You mean, uh, chronologically?
03:49Well.
03:51Oh, uh, actually, I could have gone to college this year,
03:53but my parents didn't want to push me.
03:57Most people think I'm a lot older than I look.
04:00Okay, I'll put down she's older than she looks.
04:03That's very sweet.
04:05My, that's an interesting frame.
04:07Is that a relative?
04:08It's my sister.
04:10Oh.
04:11It's funny.
04:12Most men have pictures of their wives in their offices.
04:16Only if they're married.
04:18Oh.
04:19Well, I might as well give you the bad news, Patty.
04:22You're going to have to have your tonsils out.
04:24Oh, that's terrible.
04:26The question is when.
04:28How about tonight?
04:29I'm not doing a thing.
04:30Oh.
04:31Oh.
04:32Oh.
04:33Oh.
04:34I'm not doing a thing.
04:35No?
04:36Friday is the first time I can take care of it.
04:38It's a date.
04:39I'll check you into the hospital on Thursday
04:41so we can prepare you.
04:43In the meantime, I want you to take these pills
04:45three times a day.
04:46They'll reduce infection.
04:48Well, I guess that's about it.
04:50I'll see you at the hospital.
04:52I'll be looking forward to it.
04:56I'd like to thank you very much, Doctor.
04:58You've been very kind and very considerate,
05:00and I want you to know I feel very safe being in your hands.
05:02May I ask you a personal question?
05:04Oh, yes.
05:06Is that something new?
05:08What?
05:09A jacket that buttons down the back.
05:13Oh.
05:14I'll talk to the nurse about checking you into the hospital.
05:21These came from the boatyard, Doctor.
05:23Is this the boat you're thinking of buying?
05:25What do you think of her?
05:27She's cute.
05:28Cute?
05:29I think she's a beauty.
05:31Isn't she kind of small?
05:33She's as trim as they come.
05:35Great lines.
05:37It's what I've always dreamt of.
05:51Kathy, I couldn't believe my ears.
05:53He said I was a beauty.
05:55Trim with great lines.
05:57Patty, are you sure you didn't misunderstand?
06:00How could I?
06:02Mom was the only other person in the office.
06:04Still, don't you think you're going a little overboard
06:06with all of that?
06:08You don't think I'm going to wear my crummy kid stuff
06:10to the hospital, do you?
06:12What does he look like?
06:14Kathy, you'll absolutely flip when you see him.
06:16He's tall,
06:18with kind of streaky blonde hair
06:20and way out eyes that kind of
06:22look at you.
06:26You know what he looks like?
06:28Have you ever seen Troy Donahue?
06:30Yes.
06:32Well, he's even better looking than that.
06:34Boy, am I glad
06:36I got an A in first aid.
06:42How we doing, hon?
06:44It balances.
06:46Got lucky, huh?
06:48What's all this?
06:50Bed jacket, negligee, and a nightgown.
06:52This stuff costs more than the operation.
06:54Well, I think Patty's got a little
06:56crush on the doctor.
06:58I thought I'd indulge her.
07:00Pretty good indulgence.
07:02Hey, um, how's this Dr. Morgan
07:04seem to you, anyway?
07:06Dreamy.
07:08But, I mean, does he seem to know his business?
07:10Patty and I were both very impressed with him.
07:12Well, I guess he does know
07:14his business.
07:16Hello?
07:18Oh, hello, Dr. Morgan.
07:26Hi.
07:28Who said you could come in?
07:30Well, I knocked, didn't I?
07:32Get up! You're gonna drip all over my new nightgown.
07:34Why don't you drip downstairs?
07:36Not me. I stay clear of doctors.
07:38Doctors?
07:40What doctor?
07:42Dr. Dreamy. He just called and said he was coming over.
07:44Why?
07:46Probably wants to collect his bill in advance.
07:50Kathy,
07:52do you suppose he's coming over to see me?
07:54Well, you really are a doubting Thomas.
07:56You know, if everybody had your attitude,
07:58nobody'd believe in love at first sight.
08:00Thanks for dropping these off, doctor.
08:02Yeah, it certainly was nice of you.
08:04I'd have been happy to come by and pick them up.
08:06Oh, it's all right. It's important that she get started on those tonight.
08:08And she forgot them.
08:10Someday Patty'll forget her head.
08:12Well, that's understandable.
08:14She's a little over-excited about the whole thing.
08:16Yes. I'm afraid our Patty has a slight
08:18tendency to over-dramatize.
08:20Dr. Morgan.
08:22Dr. Morgan.
08:24What a surprise.
08:26Hello, Patty.
08:28Have you met my mother?
08:30Yes, we met this afternoon in the office.
08:32Oh, and my father?
08:34Yes, we met.
08:36Oh, that's my cousin Kathy.
08:38Hello, Kathy.
08:40How do you do, Dr. Dreamy?
08:42Dr. Morgan.
08:44You forgot the pills I gave you this afternoon.
08:46That's why I came by.
08:48Oh. Well, I'd like to thank you for looking after my welfare.
08:50Mother, have you offered our guests some refreshments?
08:52No, I haven't.
08:54Coffee, tea, or milk?
08:56I'd love some coffee.
08:58Good. I'll go make some.
09:00Oh, don't bother, Mother. You know how I love to fuss around the kitchen.
09:02You do?
09:04And it'll give all of you a chance to get better acquainted.
09:06Excuse me.
09:08Kathy, would you mind giving me a hand in the kitchen?
09:14Well, why don't we sit down and make ourselves comfortable?
09:16Okay.
09:18Was I right? Isn't he something else?
09:20He really is.
09:22Kathy, I'm so excited I could scream.
09:24Patty, the only problem is apparently he's just come over to drop off the pills.
09:26Are you kidding?
09:28Don't you see? That was just an excuse.
09:30Come on. We'd better make the coffee.
09:36How do you like her?
09:40She's a beautiful model.
09:42Yeah, it's a model of a boat I used to race on.
09:44Really? Maybe you could give me your opinion.
09:46I was thinking of buying this sloop.
09:52Isn't she a beauty?
09:54I can understand why you were carried away.
09:56I saw her just once, and I couldn't forget her.
10:00Everything all right, girls?
10:02Yeah, everything's fine.
10:06Well, what do you say, Kathy?
10:08Patty's the luckiest girl alive.
10:10I know.
10:12Oh, boy.
10:14I hope that's not Richard.
10:18Hi, Mr. Lane.
10:20Oh, hello, Richard.
10:28Dr. Morgan, this is Richard, a friend of Patty's.
10:30Hello, Richard.
10:32Hi.
10:34Hi, Richard.
10:36Where's Patty, Mrs. Lane?
10:38Oh, in the kitchen.
10:40What's taking so long with the coffee?
10:42I hope you're not in a hurry.
10:44I can stay as long as the dishes hold out.
10:48After major surgery, you don't go to a dance.
10:50Oh, why not?
10:52You're not gonna dance with your throat.
10:54All you gotta do is keep your mouth shut.
10:56Richard, you really don't know much about medicine, do you?
10:58After this kind of a thing,
11:00the whole body is in a state of shock.
11:02Okay.
11:04I'm not going to the dance either.
11:06Why not?
11:09I'm not interested in taking anybody else but you.
11:13Richard,
11:15there's something I have to tell you.
11:17Yeah?
11:19You've heard of puppy love.
11:21Yeah.
11:23Well, there's nothing wrong with it.
11:25It's very sweet and very romantic.
11:27But, like everything else,
11:29one day, the puppy grows up.
11:31Do you understand?
11:33Hey, that's great!
11:35Well, where is it?
11:37Richard?
11:39You saw Dr. Morgan, didn't you?
11:41Sure, in there.
11:43Right.
11:45Now, I only just met him.
11:47But sometimes, when two people meet,
11:49zap! It happens.
11:51It's a matter of chemistry.
11:53You know what I mean?
11:55He's a chemist?
11:57I thought he was a doctor.
11:59I think you'd better stop beating around the bush.
12:01Richard,
12:03in the short time I've known Dr. Morgan,
12:05I've grown very fond of him.
12:07And it certainly seems vice versa.
12:09That guy in there?
12:11You're kidding!
12:13He's a very distinguished surgeon.
12:15He's an old man, is what he is.
12:17Richard,
12:19of course you're hurt now.
12:21But one day, you'll get over it,
12:23and you'll realize that this whole thing is a lie.
12:25It's a lie.
12:27It's a lie.
12:29One day, you'll get over it,
12:31and you'll realize that this whole thing
12:33is bigger than both of us.
12:35And in the meantime,
12:37you've got to do me one favor.
12:39What?
12:41Go home.
12:55Dr. Summers,
12:57all I can say, Ros,
12:59is he's just too beautiful to be true.
13:01You heard what?
13:03That's ridiculous.
13:05Where did you hear
13:07that the doctor and I were going steady?
13:09It's all over school?
13:11Well, for your information, Ros,
13:13Dr. Morgan and I are just good friends.
13:15And the rumor you heard is absolutely...
13:17Well, it's absolutely premature.
13:19Right.
13:21Goodbye.
13:27What'd she say?
13:29I'm not sure.
13:31I think she denied it,
13:33but then again, she didn't.
13:35Uh-huh.
13:37That's just what all the other girls said.
13:39I think a girl should finish her education first.
13:41Ros,
13:43how would you like to make a little sick call?
13:45On Patty?
13:47Right.
13:49And if she's not sick now,
13:51I think she will be.
13:53Oh, Miss Peters,
13:55you should know about this.
13:57What kind of qualities do you think a doctor's wife should have?
13:59Why do you ask?
14:01Well, I, uh, have this friend
14:03who's on the brink of going steady with a doctor.
14:05Well, a doctor's wife should be
14:07the kind of woman who can get along with two hours' sleep,
14:09doesn't mind getting up in the middle of the night
14:11to fix a pot of coffee,
14:13and doesn't get drunk at medical conventions.
14:23Hmm.
14:45Hi, there.
14:47What are you doing out of bed?
14:49Oh, it's been so long since I've seen you.
14:51I just left you half an hour ago.
14:53Oh, was it that recently?
14:55Well, as long as I'm here,
14:57I just thought I'd mention something in passing
14:59that may interest you.
15:01I don't drink.
15:03Well, I'll make a note to the dietician
15:05not to put any martinis on your tray.
15:07Oh.
15:09Is that your sailboat?
15:11Yeah, I just made an offer for her.
15:13Isn't she a beauty?
15:15She?
15:17Well, nautically speaking. She's a little small,
15:19but as trim as they come.
15:23Small?
15:25And as trim as they come?
15:29Uh, Doc,
15:31you didn't have those pictures in your office
15:33the other day when I was there, did you?
15:35Uh-huh.
15:37And you had them last night at our house.
15:39Yeah, as a matter of fact,
15:41I was showing them to your father.
15:43Oh.
15:45Something wrong?
15:47Excuse me.
16:07Her room number's 215.
16:09It's got to be right over there.
16:11Patty! Patty!
16:13Hi!
16:15What are you doing here?
16:17We just thought we'd drop in and see how you were.
16:19Where is he? Who?
16:21Who do you think? Dr. Morgan.
16:23Oh. Oh, him who?
16:25Uh, he's, uh, around.
16:27We're dying to meet him.
16:29Oh, well, uh, he was just called out
16:31on an emergency in Flatbush.
16:33You just said he was around.
16:35Oh, well, that's it. That's it. He is around.
16:37In Flatbush trying to find the emergency.
16:41Dr. Morgan. Yes, missus?
16:44Dr. Morgan.
16:46Isn't he just too groovy?
16:48Oh, Patty, you must be looking terrible.
16:50Where?
16:52Calling Dr. Paisley.
16:54Calling Dr. Paisley.
16:58I'll get this one, Joe.
17:00You get room 203.
17:08Hello, little lady.
17:10You know something?
17:12I've had my gallbladder years out
17:14and no time at all.
17:16Gallbladder? I haven't had my gallbladder out.
17:18Now, look, pussycat, who knows better,
17:20you or the doctor?
17:22Oh, but I really don't.
17:24It's all right.
17:26I'm not a doctor, but I can tell you this.
17:28A lot of people get along just swell
17:30without a gallbladder.
17:32Oh, but it's a mistake. I keep telling you.
17:34It's a terrible mistake.
17:36Yeah, well, they'll be ready for you in a few minutes.
17:38Please.
17:40Hmm.
18:06Scrubbed up yet?
18:08What are you waiting for, an engraved invitation?
18:38I feel kind of woozy.
18:40First time?
18:42Clamp your teeth together.
19:02Dr. Morgan.
19:04Yes, Miss Peters.
19:06Patty? No, she's not here.
19:08What do you mean
19:10you can't find her?
19:12Well, check it out
19:14and call me back.
19:18Dr. Morgan?
19:20Yes?
19:22I'm Richard Harrison, Patty's friend.
19:24Oh, sure. Hello, Richard. What can I do for you?
19:26Sit down.
19:28I'll stand.
19:30I'm here to lay my cards on the table.
19:32What?
19:34Table?
19:36Face up.
19:38Oh, I know.
19:40You think I'm just a kid
19:42and you're an older man.
19:44But long before you met Patty,
19:46she was gone steady with me.
19:48Since kindergarten, if you want to get down to cases.
19:50I suppose Patty discussed this with you?
19:52Sure.
19:54That's how I found out.
19:56All I want to tell you is
19:58don't pick up the marbles yet.
20:00I shouldn't.
20:02I'm still in a game.
20:08Richard,
20:10I didn't know about you.
20:12Patty and I haven't had time to discuss her past.
20:14So let's put it this way.
20:16The decision is up to her.
20:18She'll have to choose between us.
20:20And may the best man win.
20:32Dr. Morgan?
20:34Yes, Miss Peters.
20:36You found her where?
20:50Where am I?
20:52You're back in your room.
20:54Oh, yeah.
20:56I feel like such a jerk.
20:58Don't think about that now.
21:00Just think about how happy we're going to be.
21:04We are?
21:08Was all that about the boat
21:10just a dream?
21:12No, I'm buying the boat.
21:14But just think of all the wonderful hours
21:16we'll spend on it together alone.
21:20Would you like that?
21:24Uh-huh.
21:26I can see you now on the deck.
21:28The wind in your hair.
21:30Salt spray on your face.
21:32And at night,
21:34the moon watching down at us.
21:36Are you happy?
21:38Happy?
21:40I'm the happiest girl in the whole world.
21:48I'd like you to rest now.
21:52I think we better go.
21:54Bye, Dr. Morgan.
21:58Oh.
22:00How can I ever thank you, Doctor?
22:02By taking a nap.
22:04I want you to get plenty of rest
22:06before the operation tomorrow.
22:08Okay.
22:10But you know what you just did?
22:12You saved my reputation.
22:14Reputation?
22:16As the biggest liar
22:18in Brooklyn Heights High School.
22:20Oh, boy.
22:22What am I going to tell the kids
22:24when I get back to school?
22:26Well, I imagine a girl as talented
22:28as you could think of something.
22:30Why don't you tell them you
22:32dumped me?
22:34Mm-mm. They've seen you.
22:36Well, you could tell them, uh...
22:38I've got it.
22:40The letter.
22:42What letter?
22:44The letter from Dr. Schweitzer
22:46inviting you to come to his jungle hospital
22:48and work with him.
22:52What choice did I have?
22:55I couldn't keep you from dedicating your life
22:57to such a worthy cause,
22:59so I decided to be noble and give you up
23:01to the world.
23:03We discussed it, like intelligent,
23:05sophisticated, civilized people,
23:07and came to the only conclusion possible,
23:09that each of us
23:11must go on his own way,
23:13pursue his own life,
23:15knowing that a broken heart
23:17will mend
23:19in time.
23:25No, he's going to take them out this afternoon,
23:27but from now on,
23:29it's purely a professional relationship.
23:31Of course I could wait for him,
23:33but who knows when he'll get back from the jungle.
23:35Let's face it, Ross,
23:37he's no kid now.
23:39Oh, uh, by the way, Ross,
23:41whatever you do,
23:43don't mention a word of this to Monica.
23:45It's just between you and me.
23:47Okay?
23:49Bye.
23:55Well, let's see what other blabbermouth
23:57I should call.
23:59Hi, Patty.
24:01Hi, Rich.
24:11You're beautiful.
24:13I came as soon as I heard the news.
24:17I thought I saw you going down the hall.
24:19Well, Richard, the best man won.
24:21Doc, look at it this way.
24:23There are plenty of other fish in the pool.
24:25On your way over to the jungle,
24:27you might meet a very nice girl on the boat.
24:29Now, there's a lot of spinsters that go on those cruises.
24:31The thing to do is sign up for shuffleboard, see?
24:33And, oh, be sure and take
24:35a white dinner jacket.
24:37Go for that.
24:47Here's Kathy
24:49Who's lived most everywhere
24:51From Zanzibar
24:53To Barclays Square
24:55But Patty's only seen the sights
24:57A girl can see from Brooklyn Heights
24:59What a crazy pair
25:01But they're cousins
25:05Identical cousins
25:07And you'll find
25:09They laugh alike, they walk alike
25:11At times they even talk alike
25:13You can lose your mind
25:15When cousins
25:17Are two of a kind