Gogglebox Season 25 Episode 9 | Reaction Full ,
Gogglebox - Season 25 Episode 9 - Episode 9 ,
Gogglebox Season 25 Episode 9 ,
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Gogglebox - Season 25 Episode 9 - Episode 9 ,
Gogglebox Season 25 Episode 9 ,
Gogglebox.S25E09 ,
#Gogglebox
#FullEpisodes
#Season1
#SeriesYNovalasXTC
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FunTranscript
00:00Oh, I've got cramp.
00:04Mind, mind, careful.
00:07Oh, what do you do?
00:09Stand up, stand up.
00:10I can't.
00:12You've got loads of hard skin on your ears.
00:14I've got cramp, you silly bastard.
00:19Oh, that's me.
00:20Yo, love.
00:21You always get one, don't you?
00:23What's going on here?
00:24That's my weekend ruined. I've got liking tickets.
00:27Right, I'm not watching anymore.
00:29Who shot him?
00:30Him.
00:30You.
00:31Yes, yes, yes.
00:33Oh, no.
00:34I like it already.
00:35Is that a ball?
00:36What is that?
00:37Oh, well, I...
00:38Oh, no.
00:39Oh, it's bleeding.
00:41Oh, I'm getting all goosy.
00:43Well, what exciting times we live in.
00:45In the week, Universal Studios announced
00:47they was opening a brand-new theme park in Bedford.
00:51We enjoyed lots of great telly.
00:54The big guns were back out on BBC One.
00:57I've actually reached a new personal vest at the gym, me.
01:04Oh, yeah?
01:04Yeah.
01:05Well, I can actually put two 25-kilo vickies on the bar there.
01:09Huh?
01:10Can't lift it, lad.
01:11I can put them on it.
01:12Can't put them on the bar.
01:13Trump's tariffs caused a global economy meltdown.
01:17The customary smiles and cheers
01:19that accompany the start of Wall Street trading.
01:22But on the trading floor, alarm bells sounding.
01:25I'd never be working on Wall Street.
01:26It's too unpredictable.
01:27Well, you don't have a clue about stocks and shares either.
01:30For a start.
01:31Yeah.
01:32That might help you become a cropper.
01:34And it was time for a grilling
01:35for Sugar's latest batch on BBC One.
01:39You've got no real history.
01:40You've got no real experience.
01:41But scaling up to £1 million projected revenue in year two,
01:45it's nonsense.
01:46It's absolutely nonsense.
01:48When I go into an interview, I interview them.
01:50That's the whole point.
01:51And I flip it over.
01:52Mutual?
01:53Yeah.
01:54This is my life and my time
01:56and I don't actually want this job.
01:58So you convince me why I should work.
02:01Yeah.
02:02How does that work for you?
02:03It's not worked out so well, really.
02:06No.
02:13Sorry.
02:14I was at this big disability conference thing last week.
02:19And we do this thing, so if there's people in the audience
02:22that are blind or visually impaired,
02:25you do a little bit of audio description of yourself.
02:27Simon and his sister Jane.
02:29So I was about to speak and I said,
02:31I'm Simon.
02:32I am a man with,
02:36well, I have dwarfism,
02:38so I'm about 3 foot 10, 1 meter 20,
02:40and I've got blondish hair,
02:43I've got a bit of stubble,
02:45and someone wolf whistled me
02:46at my audio description.
02:49They're blind, though, Simon.
02:50You walked into that.
03:00On Thursday night,
03:02it was crunch time
03:03for the remaining candidates on BBC One.
03:06It's interview week.
03:07It's final five, Jane.
03:08We're close to the apprentice
03:10becoming the apprentice.
03:11You're fine.
03:12Where did you get fired from again?
03:16Arcadia.
03:16They're not even going anymore,
03:18so who's laughing now?
03:19Hello?
03:20In the programme,
03:21it was the usual early morning call
03:23from Lord Sugar
03:23that had everyone in a flap.
03:28What is that?
03:29Amber Rose Badrudin
03:30is hoping her bubble tea business
03:33is to Lord Sugar's taste.
03:35Bubble tea?
03:35Bubble tea?
03:36What's bubble tea?
03:37Bubble tea has come and gone,
03:39man, haven't they?
03:39Huh?
03:40Have they?
03:40Well, I...
03:41I didn't even know we were sick.
03:42With my new business,
03:43the fact that I already have a following
03:45on social media
03:46just means that when I get the investment,
03:47it's bound to be successful.
03:49She's talking like it's already wrapped up.
03:51Oh, yeah.
03:52She's got the job.
03:53Don't worry about that.
03:5434-year-old,
03:55Essex-born Dean Franklin.
03:57Air conditioning
03:57is the future.
04:00Air conditioning?
04:01That was a boring thing in the world.
04:03I know all about air conditioning.
04:06I work at an air conditioning business.
04:08Not only do we offer services,
04:09we offer maintenance and repairs as well.
04:12I know all about maintenance and repairs.
04:14Air conditioning.
04:14You need your planned preventative maintenance
04:16in order to honour your warranty.
04:17Filters must be cleaned on a six-monthly basis.
04:27Oh, there he is, Billy Big Cheese.
04:29Now it's time to get down to business.
04:32I'd be getting all clammy and sweaty
04:34at this point, wouldn't I?
04:34Yeah.
04:35Yeah.
04:36Please hand your proposals
04:37over to Tim and Karen.
04:42Hand them over.
04:43This is where they come under the microscope here.
04:47Hello, Linda.
04:48Oh, here we go.
04:48Amber Rose.
04:49Hi.
04:50Nice to meet you.
04:52Oh, she's a tough cookie.
04:53It's Linda, isn't she?
04:54Oh, Linda scares the shit out of me already.
04:56So the bubble tea market
04:57is definitely a heavily saturated market, isn't it?
05:01It is.
05:01It is.
05:01Because it's been around since 1980.
05:04Well, I've never had a bubble tea.
05:05I've never fucking heard of a bubble tea.
05:07I am.
05:08But coffee shops have been around for a while
05:09and there's still emerging brands that do great.
05:11Oh, Amber Rose.
05:13That was good.
05:14Yes, girl.
05:15To be fair, it does have a point.
05:17Don't compare bubble tea to a coffee chain.
05:20You can't.
05:20Yeah.
05:21So don't.
05:21You can't, so don't.
05:23That got it, I told.
05:24Don't speak to me until I've had my bubble tea.
05:27Yeah, I've had my morning bubble tea.
05:29Two kids have had me up all night.
05:31I need a bubble tea.
05:32Your expansion programme, 320 stores in 10 years.
05:36Wow.
05:37God, that's a lot.
05:38Oh, you're pissing up, wind, sweetie.
05:40Even I know that's no chance.
05:42Your biggest competitor, Mubu,
05:44they got 100 stores in 13 years.
05:47Dreaming bigger than that, Linda?
05:48Uh, yeah, I would say they don't have Lord Sugar behind me, Linda.
05:53I think it's wildly optimistic and I think it's not realistic.
05:56She'd burst your bubble.
05:57Yeah.
05:59Yeah.
05:59I'd have been like, I'm so sorry, Linda.
06:00I'm so sorry, Linda.
06:01I'm doing good.
06:04Pleasure to meet you, Mike.
06:06Take a seat.
06:07Here we go.
06:07Great.
06:08McDonald's up.
06:08Tell me about your current business.
06:10So it's a future-proof company.
06:12Everybody is going to need air conditioning at some point
06:15and they need it now more than ever.
06:17Global warming.
06:19With the increase of climate control.
06:21Climate control?
06:23Climate control, yeah.
06:24What?
06:25Huh?
06:26He's used the wrong word.
06:28Climate zone.
06:29It's depleting.
06:30The climate zone is depleting.
06:32Climate change, Dean.
06:33He's had a word salad problem, Nutty,
06:36like that woman that lost the election.
06:38What was she called?
06:39Camilla.
06:40He's had a Camilla-style word salad breakdown already.
06:44What does that mean?
06:44So, obviously, now that we're getting longer summers,
06:48we're getting longer summers.
06:49Yeah.
06:50No, we're not.
06:52Someone's stopping.
06:53Which season's getting shorter to get longer summers?
06:56Yeah.
06:58That's like saying we're getting longer Octobers.
07:01Yeah.
07:01So, winner is getting shorter.
07:04Is it?
07:05What does happen to you?
07:06Oh, someone passed in a shovel and let them dig themselves out of this one.
07:09So, on your website, it says,
07:11our fully qualified engineers will always treat your home as if it were their own.
07:15Yeah.
07:16Oh, no.
07:17And you stand by that.
07:18Stand by that.
07:19Oh, God.
07:20Do you remember posting this on social media?
07:22What is it?
07:24Oh, no.
07:26What is that?
07:27Oh, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho.
07:30So, we was working in a sex shop.
07:32Oh.
07:33And I thought it would be quite funny.
07:35What the fuck?
07:37It doesn't give professional, does it, cock-on-a-wall-mounted unit.
07:40This doesn't say to me,
07:42here's a trusted organisation who's going to come into my home
07:46and treat it like their own.
07:47do you not stick your dildos to your air conditioning unit that could have not gone
07:53any worse i've managed to get through life without a job interview in my life mary
07:58that doesn't mean to say i've never had a job i know you've had three or four i had a job when
08:02i was very young nutty harvesting crops in a field i didn't know that yeah i had i had to give up
08:10after a few days because i said it was ruining my fingers and i was trying to learn to play the
08:15classical guitar and therefore i couldn't ruin my fingers pulling weeds in an agricultural setting
08:23in leeds got a bone to pick with you went to go do my weekly shot which me and alexa have a great
08:30relationship where i tell her what i need throughout the week and then on the weekend i can go and do
08:34my shopping because she's remembered everything i've said why is it on number three on my shopping
08:38list condoms i knew it was you best friends danielle and daniella you know what i i've never put
08:46anything in my own alexa shopping ever it's great because you know when you go in like you use your
08:51last dishwasher tablet you just say alexa add dishwasher tablets to my shopping list is this
08:55our lives now this is what we do this is what we talk about appliances yeah well what else is there
09:00to talk about because i don't need the bloody condoms on saturday night lee mack had our minds in a tizz
09:09again on itv why are you looking at me like that i'm showing a lot of forehead today what's wrong
09:15this is my normal amount of forehead that i show i've done too much forehead today it's like braid
09:22training for us it's one percent club it's educational it's about the only educational thing
09:26we do every week hey i'm getting some books for my birthday don't mean you'll read them
09:31oh it's that man nana likes she likes one percent club oh does she yeah she does now i think lee
09:41mack's a bit of a know-it-all but so is nana that's why they like that's why they get on
09:46we join this week's episode towards the end with only the brain boxers still left in
09:51there are only 10 people left in the quiz and now it's time for the 10 question i bet i get this
09:58right and you don't five quid i mean if i think about my friendship group and the top 10 percent
10:02like intellectual wise i'm not in there i'm not in that group no you're not a family of five are
10:08doing the hokey cokey grandma always gets it wrong and puts an arm in when everyone else puts a leg in
10:14oh no i don't think i've ever done the hokey cokey i've lived a very dull life mary and a leg in
10:20when everyone else puts an arm in i'd get rid of grandma straight away sounds like you heard you
10:25doing this getting it wrong shut up when the song says you put your left leg in how many legs in total
10:32are not in not in one incorrect so if grandma's the only one that gets it wrong that does one look
10:38is not in oh yes i sang four i'm going six one i don't even know how the song goes
10:45that's not it am i am i am i stupid yeah four take the left leg out god jenny how many legs
10:53just tell me a minute how many legs has grandma got she's got two she keeps her both their legs in
10:59so six four legs total and what about the woman whose arm put her arm in she haven't got her leg in
11:06right so they're not in so it's two of her legs there's only five of them so grand me granny's
11:12now shoved her leg in two legs are not in no right look it in boss one there's the four spare ones that
11:22everybody else has and grandma's two so it's six five legs are out because everybody's got one in
11:27but granny hasn't got any legs in because she's got an arm in so it's six legs around
11:32you would be in blame i like it when you get to see the knitwear it's like they zoom in on them
11:39right we lost three people though let's have a look at the answer what's the answer drumroll
11:43right now hold that tea never mind drumroll you've already sloshed on your leggings
11:47it's six hey yes six yay get in there
11:54it's four people are doing it correctly so have one leg in and one leg out but grandma has her arm in
12:02and both legs out easy when do the questions start like so you're not in the 10% club i would have
12:08lose my card what card there's no card there is a card you don't play the game so how would you know
12:14i pay it nearly every fucking week you're not gonna lose an arm no i'm not you piss me off
12:20right at the end there was only one man still standing who was taking his chances to win 100
12:26grand steve good luck this is your one percent question right here we go here we go lee come on
12:33now i know exactly how he feels at the minute because i'm the only one in this house that's got
12:37right what two letters replace the question marks but the blazes hang on let me just have a look
12:43at this
12:44two times in equals poison e times equals leave
12:51you should be able to get this we would if we had a few more days no
12:59have you got anything jane no text message
13:05toxin equals poison
13:07it it's it it's e times it so times is x
13:16hundred thousand pounds exit right your time's up steve uh you have locked your answers in oh look
13:21at his face oh no he's grimacing daniella does he know it but he blocked it in oh shit what have you put
13:27n and e i think i put n and e n and e
13:29steve no
13:31knee he's put knee
13:33it's i and t
13:36i and t
13:37if you replace times with x you form words with the same meaning as the words on the right
13:43text toxin x it
13:46so he's got nothing nothing no yeah but he's still got that he was in the five percent though
13:50he's five percent club have you got any money though no nothing just think about steve will you
13:55never mind steve it's worth a million dollars to me that because i beat you
14:00do you know what i'm at ex it actually sure she's all doing my heavy
14:04in leeds nat's making me promise to cut his hair this weekend he says if i don't do it he's
14:17gonna go to the turkish barbers i don't blame him sisters ellie and izzy but when mam came around
14:24last night and she says oh now i like you i like that a bit longer god what's mam doing flirting with
14:30now and mom why don't you just get off with that what she gave toby hugging a kiss on cheek and i
14:37went to toby when we left i went what's with my mom trying to get off with her on thursday we found
14:44more funny ways of fearing for the future in this netflix drama two years i've been waiting for this
14:50oh it always makes me very uneasy this they do some good stuff they do it's too close to the truth
15:07i feel like it's getting harder and harder for black metal to kind of have the same impact on you
15:11why because the world has just turned into black mirror kind of yeah i know what you mean then the
15:15sun's rays travel millions and millions of miles all from space little science class here talking
15:22about solar pv panels they uh travel far travel oh she don't look very well she looks as if she's
15:31about to have a seizure or something oh no oh she's gone no she's not very well at all there is no simple
15:41solution due to where it's located and how long it's been growing it's essentially fused to her
15:46parietal lobe oh that brain is that in the brain yeah she's got a brain tumor
15:51shit mr waters is that the husband i guess so you know chris so down isn't this is she gonna be okay
16:00i'm sorry her progress is isn't good okay it's not looking good bro do you don't wear that do you
16:06there must be something you can do even just a few months ago i have said no but now there may
16:11be an option what there's an option what this is black mirror jane there's gonna be some weird
16:17possible solution you've never even comprehend it's a new startup they have an experimental
16:22procedure experimental procedure as soon as you mentioned that those two words experimental
16:27procedure together oh i'm out i'm done their rep was in here just last week you want me to call her
16:32yeah i want you to call her well you'd try anything wouldn't you yeah he's got no choice
16:36he's desperate isn't he oh is this the rep you must be mike i'm gainer tracy ellis ross in it
16:47come with me diana ross's daughter yes she is so we take an imprint of the affected part of her
16:52neural structure and we clone it she would have lost me back then you know what she had about we make a
16:58backup of part of her brain onto our computer what what we put a bit of the brain on the computer
17:06that doesn't sound that far-fetched does this is only a few years of answer you know who's sitting
17:10here taking notes elon elon musk yeah tell me more and then the river mind system transmits cognitive
17:18function from the backup on the cloud-based server on the cloud like where your photos go yeah it's like
17:25when you back up your phone on icloud what oh just let me go because i don't know what you're on
17:32about how much is this gonna cost oh the million dollar question the surgery is free your favorite
17:39price you'll do for me you're thinking of getting it yourself you aren't even gonna brain shoot
17:45it's free i love it i'm not at the monthly charge yeah just calm down you want a coffee yes please god
17:52yes thank you oh she's back at home look she had a surgery so we did it then bloody hell have you
17:58tried espresso grande why is she bringing up espresso grande the beans are roasted slow and long for
18:04a richer smoother taste you know what's happening it was an advert it was not right
18:11it yeah yeah they're bumping adverts then can't say that i have can't say that you have what tried
18:19uh espresso grande is that what this is oh she doesn't remember what she just said no she's forgotten
18:26that's the catch you gotta be you gotta be extra to get rid of that
18:33so at the hive the bees pass the nectar between themselves until it's gooey oh she's back teaching
18:39i'm working yeah and then they push it into the wax chamber until it becomes honey
18:45bobby it becomes honey that's right honey oh no i feel an ad coming on kids love honey
18:52that's why parents love honey nugs what the
18:54whole green chunks covered in golden tupelo honey oh my god honey nugs from didda
19:02oh my god oh my god it's taggy dads by real life
19:10oh uh-huh
19:15i can't wait for this advert what's it going to be
19:18ride smooth with thirst trap lube
19:21wow ride smooth this trap lube
19:27why did why did you just say ride smooth with thirst trap lube
19:32oh no i think the pennies dropped to you
19:34no i'm sorry
19:36fuck if i must kill that
19:37oh that's putting right off black mirror is truly back at least you'll be getting the best deals i suppose
19:42i feel weird and dirty and ashamed to be a human feeling weird and dirty and ashamed to be a human
19:48well do you know what 10 years ago bet you wouldn't have believed that your phone would be listening to
19:52you 24 7 and tailoring ads to target to you you won that's phone engagement rings
19:58engagement rings engagement rings wedding wedding wedding
20:00in hall hey i thought about you the other day but you might as well have this oh thank you
20:10no good for me what is it you have it best friends jenny and lee i don't like it on my skin
20:17what's it you can have it you'll get more wearer oil yeah beard oil
20:23come on i had one yesterday on friday the leader of the free world had something new
20:32up his sleeve bbc news filled us in i don't need to eat it boiling no no no i just need to
20:39heat it up oh you're all right okay not the news more news not here now in our other main story
20:46today oh wow liberation day china has hit back after donald trump announced tariffs on almost
20:53every country in the world oh here we go oh my god jerry's been plumbing tariffing people left
20:59right and center as donald trump beijing has now slapped a reciprocal 34 on all us goods entering the
21:06country wow oh it's getting tip for tap the point is no one is meant to win uh a trade war you can't
21:11you can't win it just makes everything worse for everybody just take a look at this graph oh no
21:16don't look if it shows stock markets in the uk china germany and the us they've dived
21:22look at that oh my god look look at that drop they slumped yesterday and then they tumbled again
21:29today now i'm not a financial advisor but that don't look good to me the uk markets suffered
21:34their worst day since the covid pandemic over five years ago everyone's pension if you if you contribute
21:41to a private pension uh where does it go it's in stocks and shares and they've nose dived
21:47speculated so it's bad news well i won't be affected because i don't have a pension or a
21:52stocks and shares isa so to you donald i was laughing now so far the uk is hoping that negotiations on a
22:01trade agreement will deliver an exemption of tariffs oh an exemption would be good because then it wouldn't
22:07cost us anything would it that is the typical uk response sorry fingers crossed you know what we
22:13like shopping at costco and that's america and what if prices in costco go up the kirkland toilet roll
22:18oh my god what will we do we'll be wiping his ass with pound nuts the trump administrations dismissed
22:24the market turmoil as teething trouble what i don't think so have they got their heads up their
22:30fucking horses you know if you want liz truss and quasi-quartag to look over the books just say
22:35the word yeah those ones are great they'll dig out the shit they'll come highly recommended in less
22:41than 12 hours president trump's universal tariffs kick in meaning goods arriving into america will have
22:46an extra 10 percent in taxes to pay threatening higher prices for us customers or a hit to american
22:53businesses so how's that going to help the americans i just don't get it america is the land of the
22:58consumer so their people are going to go ballistic when they can't buy what they want or if they can
23:04it's twice the price exactly donald trump's doing this because he wants america to re-industrialize
23:10yes everything at home grow yeah economists are warning of a heightened risk of global recession
23:18what does that mean what does this what is happening tonight reports that nintendo is delaying
23:24shipment of its new switch to console in a fresh blow to american shoppers oh no god man if he hits
23:32the nerds the nerds it's all over the trading game has hit a new level and with little chance of a
23:38swift resolution seems set to deliver more losers than winners if super mario cars gets affected i
23:43hadn't quite realized how serious this was see a global recession now we have a global recession
23:50how are we gonna feed our dog
24:00in wiltshire what have you got there mary i've got something to help you calm down
24:04calm yes it's called a cbd drink so it's got cannabis it's just gonna make me chilled giles and his wife
24:13mary don't spoil things for me no just put your hands down i'm going to tell you what it is
24:24i've already it's already starting to have an effect on this it's got a calming agent in it
24:30coming to calm you're done i've never tried coming
24:41oh stop it right i'll never buy you one again if you try to annoy me it's already having an effect
24:46mary just when we thought we'd run out of talent itv proved us wrong on saturday night when i say b
24:53do you say gt b gt oh well done dad oh big stretch what i'd really like to see
25:04on britain's got talent would be a dog a big dog with a brush in his mouth
25:13grooming a smaller dog with a chihuahua on their back cooperating them oh yes possibly
25:23i have played the piano and sang for the public for over 18 years this is going to be boring
25:43yeah but you don't know he's going to play it with you yeah
25:45well you're fucking i'm joking i am very nervous we're all behind you aren't we
25:50it's come on show us what you can do mate i've had stage fright before
25:55have you when you've gone oh yeah it wasn't funny daniella
26:00but it's flying high it's 59 i know sure it looks so good than you
26:06sun in the sky you you you how i feel sun in the sky
26:12sun in the sky why is he exaggerating it like that
26:21he's not tickling bruno's pickle
26:29oh let's just take that time
26:30i've never seen elton john do this playing the piano
26:48i've never seen elton john do this
26:52what happened to this guy what has been all in his long life that this has happened to
27:05this is what i think the inside of your brain looks like
27:08what's a bloody chaos and it is great but i don't really see the point
27:25oh here we go oh he's on the big ones
27:28oh i'd be doing that if i were an audience
27:38mix grip come on
27:39wow that was very good mixer he tried very hard it was quite an unusual act yes
27:59but um i didn't derive any enjoyment from it no
28:02in kent you know how you go to the gym yeah and i'm very impressed you go to the gym yeah but
28:09i'm only impressed with half of you because you don't do legs michael sally and their songs
28:15jake and harry you've got a great top half but you need if you you need my bottom if you
28:21because my legs are ripped right my legs are ripped hell yeah can i if you have
28:27you don't see my calf muscle oh for fuck's sake for fuck's sake no don't go on i chose your
28:32calf muscle now don't take your chances go on then let's see let's see no actually stop
28:36actually just stop actually that is a calf muscle are you glad you married
28:41yeah okay maybe maybe ignore the sock bit but you know on saturday night fitness fanatics were
28:48battling it out again on bbc one gladiators they actually do a miserable person's version of
28:54this called samiators i think a lot of these people who do manic exercise do it for uh the
29:05dopamine hit that they get and then it becomes an addiction running becomes an addiction see that
29:11man that runs past every single day yeah he's wasted his life are you ready for the second of our
29:18semi-finals semi-finals tonight it's no ordinary gladiators does the semi-final mean it's almost
29:25over yeah powerball you can't say the titles without using that voice can you get oh this is
29:33where they go this is physical this isn't it get the balls in the pods
29:41the gladiators are going all out on these
29:54that don't look too good it seems to be her knee xavier down
30:24and he's gone did you see that then she's been through the wars uh savior's on an uphill battle
30:30now i think basically the gladiators task is to make it so that you can't go to work on monday
30:35morning like they've ruined you enough so that you have to have a week off after taking even more
30:40of a battery xavier easily shoved over there she is not 100 percent oh she's struggling on that knee
30:46and mark cluttenberg's gonna stop it oh she looks oh she looks fucked just knock it on the head she
30:52spent more time on the floor than stood up we saw xavier power through to take on the eliminator
30:58so not much of an opening lead for anila oh look she's up yes come on girl look at the way xavier
31:07is taking to the eliminator with such enthusiasm despite doing it on one leg
31:11let's knock and knock this yeah oh wow she seems to have got a condition called second wind
31:18all right she's got second wind and neila having a spotted bother on the rope and xavier would you
31:24believe this oh neila you've just lost your lead oh you lost your lead you can see the agony
31:30it's etched all over her face oh she's screaming go on girl go on girl quit your teeth
31:37xavier climbs over the top first and limps her way across oh she's limping
31:42xavier's really giving it beans here everything she's got and the travelator
31:50could make all the difference here she's got no chance of the travelator jenny
31:54chicken hardly bastard wow she ain't got a travelator like that listen i'm telling you man
31:58she's going up that travelator
32:00oh
32:08there's the inevitable snowball but she's killed
32:10hey with a dick in here as well i told you man that was life worth man right pop yourself through that paper
32:18oh an incredible performance from xavier
32:22yes come on yes
32:26yes
32:28she never give up once oh my god you've done us real proud and you i can't believe you're
32:38fucking crying at the gladiators
32:47in soli hall we're buying clothes for ourselves a little bit too old for our age i think we need to
32:53rain it in a bit theresa and her wife anita is top shop still open oh i don't know is it might go
33:00in there dorothy perkins has gone that's it yeah well we need to go into a younger person's shop
33:07i think that's what we need to do start dressing a bit younger i'm quite comfortable the way i am
33:12thank you very much on your elasticated trousers yes no wonder you're comfortable on sunday night the
33:19charity bakers were back wetting our appetites on channel four do you know what i was thinking i
33:24want a food processor i know i'm one of them i put then i was thinking can i get one for my birthday
33:32or is that entering sad bastard territory i prefer to watch your celebrities yeah 100 because they're
33:38just as bad as us well me and you two not to wait
33:43there's nothing sweet here is there i need a cake if i'm watching bake off i need a cake
33:51if you're a showstopper challenge the judges would love you to make a pie trait a what a what a pie
33:56trait yeah it's got to be a face of someone but of a pie no inner pie that's a portrait made out of
34:02a pie of your favorite celebrity hero i would choose alan carr as my celebrity hero for this one yes
34:10because it'd be easy to do with a pie glasses teeth easy alan carr paulian uh martin kent so
34:17predictable and my favorite singer which is the one with long eight stephen taylor why is it so much
34:26stickier than i was at home i wonder adam buxton i've listened to a podcast by i think he's a median
34:34he's quite funny he's got one of them stupid hipster hats on i can't stand them i can't stand them
34:39that's i'm just gonna say it morning adam what kind of pie are you making okay so i'm making a
34:45cherry pie i've literally just been talking about cherry pie yeah cherry pie in a bowl of custard
34:50the stuff of dreams it is my hero is ridley scott idea is for it to be a visual tribute to the film
34:57alien oh race for lots of blood guts and go oh not the sea where it's crawling out of a go please the
35:03scene in which a baby alien xenomorph bursts from the stomach of john hurt oh no you don't want a pie
35:12and see the alien popping out of it it's a cherry pie so it's a good idea oh he's gonna use a banana
35:19i'm gonna construct the pastry around the banana that's gonna give it the projection that's very
35:24clever now he's gonna have to be careful it's not gonna just look like a penis yeah yeah as the race
35:30is on to hit the ovens the bakers must still find time to give their pies a life of their own he's got
35:36the perfect banana for it as well it does it's time to put a bit of texture in wait don't look too badly
35:43does it that does look like an alien it's got teeth do the ball work before it goes in the oven oh now that
35:51is looking good simon yeah i don't even know what it looks like i think you do know what it looks
35:57like that is the problem the challenge is just to ensure that all this stuff doesn't just slide off
36:03i am frightened about that there's a distinct flaw in his plan with using a banana okay because it's
36:07gonna cook and then it's gonna all go floppy floppy good luck good luck you're gonna need it if it survives
36:16the next 10 minutes without just sliding off the last thing you want is anything sliding off your
36:20banana you know you could end up in right trouble oh you no don't you do that oh no starting i knew in
36:26the floor oh no my alien's drooping the alien's gone limp we've all been in that boat adam i can
36:33assure you bakers you've got five minutes left oh you bugger what's he doing with that stick oh my god
36:43i remember having a test like that once bloody hell
36:46oh god give up adam would you like to bring up your showstopper please oh
36:57i hate the way that it quivers me oh my days it looks like a willy poking out of a pie
37:02and he wants to meet you
37:10i've never seen anything quite like that
37:15come on paul please stop making it ding that for goodness sake that was enjoyable wasn't it yeah
37:24original as well lots of laughs
37:27in derby guys i've got my charity run soon guess how much i've raised all about 100 10 pound 10
37:37pound the siddiquis so i'm doing it with a team of other people and uh we've got to raise 2 000
37:43between us and there's 20 people doing it all right oh easy yeah so it's 100 pound i've got but
37:48i don't want to raise that and i don't want to be but so they like put out a leaderboard every like
37:53few days and i'm right at the bottom i think if i don't if i finish at the bottom i might get
37:58deported you'll get deported for so many other reasons on saturday night we settled in for another
38:06burst of the blues and twos on bbc one somebody said to me the other day i look a bit like victoria
38:11beckin you make victoria beckin you make victoria beckin look like a lot of us
38:19here we call a bit of blood and corner wouldn't it
38:25if your cold had got any worse darling i might have liked to call an ambulance for you
38:30you might well have done yeah you don't know how bad i was but i don't make half the fuss you do
38:36oh you know where this is going somebody's gonna be on the bonnet of that van in a minute
38:49you won't believe this fella we're just singing i get knocked down come on get up again
38:53oh stop stop stop oh she's seen something what they stopped for what is it something in a row
39:04what is that what's on the road jesus three zero zero six control uh running call jesus what what
39:13what is it is it an animal life status questionable oh well then don't see that every day
39:24where the hell is the rest of it oh it's still warm it's still warm looks a bit pale like skin
39:33doesn't it i think the circulation stopped julie is this your arm
39:45over here oh wow there's a car down there hello
39:50oh no hello hello hey is he in shock one of them's gonna come around and realize they've got
39:56they haven't got a hand oh i'm just looking at that it's would that have been a very long arm if
40:05you put the other end up don't spoil it it's like mr tickle
40:15well he's obviously had his arm out of the window and hit the bridge
40:20oh what we need here is a tourniquet to me right everybody say nice and calm for me nice and calm
40:28are you having a joke he's lost half his arm ellis talk to me mate
40:35oh my god is the tree gonna come down well it is casualty
40:39it's high drama on casualty they don't pay the emergency services nowhere near enough do they
41:08give them another two units of ffp another two units of packed cells that's the arm jake
41:13i can see that simon nice to keep it fresh oh what the the heart the other half of the arm
41:19well the loose bit yes any sign of the surgeon speak of the devil and he shall appear he's a
41:24famous actor mary can you remember him ken from carnation street no he's not he's a famous actor
41:29good good thank you thank you okay so this is ellis garrick oh reader's got a new job
41:35she's got a clipboard i bet you're jealous oh i am do you have plenty of bandages to step
41:38the bleed on that arm yeah it's on the bed sorry it's on the bed oh there's the arm there's the
41:42arm it's in a tupperware box oh god thanks for a bag amazing thank you yeah yes don't forget the arm
41:50man oh what's happening he's bleeding again he's splitting grab that we're gonna need another
41:58ton of cake guys oh you'll have to hold it hold what hold the stomp okay not really squeeze squeeze
42:07there you go the suit is a very miserable bastard he is isn't he don't know he's not very nicely no he's
42:13not at all a bit later whilst the surgeon was working out what to do with the arm
42:18reader got a call about the other patient that's one rita hi stevie what do you want basically i need
42:25to forget the arm forget the arm oh so they've got to make a decision yeah i've got a kid here
42:32this is the 17 year old with a new score of six you know he's triggering for sepsis we're not gonna
42:37possible organ failure sex that is mad though what are you gonna do you're gonna save the
42:45older brother's arm or the younger brother's life let's be real whatever it is the other trauma team
42:50will have to do it yeah the other trauma team will have to do it if we clear the theater for him then
42:54this fellow loses an arm yeah but the other guy could die arm or life arm or life which one life
43:00would you lose your arm to save my life i mean it pissed me off but i won't how likely is it that this
43:06arm attachment is gonna work genuine question yes come on reader call him out man don't let that
43:13little boy die come on yeah that's what i'm saying is i'm gonna work after that yeah is it just gonna
43:17be attached to you and be green stiff yeah you know what i mean i agree it is a long shot well yeah
43:23get that other hand saved my apologies gentlemen it appears that your services are no longer required
43:28oh they've the plastic surgeons off sling that arm in the bed
43:32oh you're bending the arm oh simon i'd sacrifice half my left arm to keep you alive i don't know about
43:43me right my aunt was a nurse and one night in dublin she had to take a leg an amputated leg to the morgue
43:53yeah and it kicked her oh it didn't marry it didn't
44:02something big on the way the piano the new series with claudia mika and john batiste music to bring
44:08the emotion and authentic passion from across the uk play your heart out and start sunday at nine right
44:14here on channel four