• 2 days ago
Good Morning Pakistan | Purana Daur, Naya Daur | Sunita Marshall | Saima Qureshi | Fahima Awan | 20th December 2024 | ARY Digital

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Transcript
00:00:00This morning has come, kissing your cheeks
00:00:17Swinging like the wind, going round and round
00:00:22Smiling like this, this morning has come
00:00:41It is humming, it is waking everyone up
00:00:46The bird that has come with flowers in its beak
00:00:56It is all wet, wet, wet, wet, wet
00:01:00It is all wet, wet, wet, wet, wet
00:01:02It is all wet, wet, wet, wet, wet
00:01:05This morning has come
00:01:12Good morning Pakistan
00:01:20Assalam-o-Alaikum, good morning Pakistan
00:01:24We are a little late, thank you for waiting
00:01:27And sorry that we are a little late
00:01:29There were some issues
00:01:31Clothes sometimes get tight or traffic jams
00:01:35So we make you bear such things
00:01:39Make you wait
00:01:41Today's topic is very interesting
00:01:43And that's why I have called my guests here
00:01:46But before introducing them
00:01:48I want to tell you what we have brought for you today
00:01:50Everything that we have learnt in life
00:01:53We feel that it has come from our mother
00:01:55Whatever our mother did
00:01:57And whatever our mother does at this age
00:01:58We do the same
00:02:00But whatever we have learnt
00:02:02We have to filter it and change it a little
00:02:05According to the times
00:02:07So today's topic is something like this
00:02:09On parenting
00:02:11Are we the same kind of mothers
00:02:13Like our mothers
00:02:15The way they brought us up
00:02:17Are we bringing up our children the same way
00:02:19Or have we created resistance inside
00:02:23What differences have we brought in our children's parenting
00:02:27Which our parents may not have brought
00:02:30Are we better than them
00:02:32Or were they better than us
00:02:34Do our children need the same strict parenting
00:02:38There are so many questions in our mind
00:02:40And we get very confused
00:02:42Because everything else is in front of us
00:02:44That if mom had said this, I would have done it
00:02:46If mom had said this, I would have done it
00:02:48But after coming here
00:02:50We have to use our mind
00:02:52As mothers, as fathers, as parents
00:02:54So let's get to know from our celebrities
00:02:58How they differentiated
00:03:02What their parents taught them
00:03:04We have to make them feel
00:03:08Like they are their own children
00:03:12We have to induce them inside
00:03:14Let's meet Sunita Marshall
00:03:16She is here with me
00:03:18Assalamualaikum
00:03:20How are you?
00:03:22First of all, congratulations
00:03:24Your new set is very beautiful
00:03:26I have come here for the first time
00:03:28But Mashallah, Mashallah
00:03:30It is very beautiful
00:03:32Congratulations
00:03:34The second one also got the same rating
00:03:36As the first season
00:03:38Then I have with me
00:03:40Salma Qureshi
00:03:42Assalamualaikum
00:03:44How are you?
00:03:46I am fine
00:03:48Then I have with me
00:03:50Fahima Awan
00:03:52Assalamualaikum
00:03:54How are you?
00:03:56Today the guest came first
00:03:58And the host came later
00:04:00It's okay
00:04:02Sometimes it happens
00:04:04But sometimes it happens
00:04:08Today's topic is very interesting
00:04:12Mothers talk about fashion
00:04:14And many other things
00:04:16When they are not mothers
00:04:18But when they become mothers
00:04:20I have seen their conversation changing
00:04:22They talk about the color of the child's potty
00:04:24They talk about the milestones of the child
00:04:26Their conversation changes
00:04:28Their conversation changes
00:04:30Then we remember our mothers
00:04:32That our mothers also used to talk like this
00:04:34And we used to say
00:04:36Mom, what are you saying?
00:04:38And we used to talk exactly the same
00:04:40So at that time
00:04:42That thing happens
00:04:44When you are in teenage
00:04:46Or you are a girl
00:04:48No, I will not carry anyone's child
00:04:50I will not wash them
00:04:54I will not bathe
00:04:56But when we become mothers
00:04:58Then we say
00:05:00Leave it, we will do it
00:05:02We will do it
00:05:04So today we will talk about parenting
00:05:06And obviously
00:05:08All of us
00:05:10I have seen
00:05:12They sing the praises of their mothers
00:05:14Most people say that their mothers have a big hand
00:05:16In upbringing
00:05:18I have the same question for you
00:05:20What do you think?
00:05:22Are you a better parent?
00:05:24Or your parents are better?
00:05:28Tell me
00:05:30Can you compare?
00:05:32I think
00:05:34When the world changes
00:05:36Along with that
00:05:38Your thinking also changes
00:05:40And you try to
00:05:42Move with the times
00:05:44So our parents
00:05:46They used to talk according to their times
00:05:48We talk according to our times
00:05:50And our children
00:05:52They talk according to their times
00:05:54Which has changed very quickly
00:05:58Obviously gadgets have come
00:06:00Their knowledge has increased
00:06:02Exactly
00:06:04When we were 12
00:06:06Or 13
00:06:08We were kids
00:06:10And now
00:06:12The 12 or 13 year old
00:06:14Has become an adult
00:06:16Because their knowledge has increased a lot
00:06:18Which is not a bad thing
00:06:20But I think
00:06:22The childhood has ended
00:06:24And that's why
00:06:26The way the kids were handled
00:06:28Now the handling has changed
00:06:30Exactly
00:06:32Now we can't say
00:06:34You go down, we have to talk
00:06:36He will say, I know all this
00:06:38And earlier
00:06:40Parents used to scold a lot
00:06:42If we have asked a question
00:06:44And they don't want to answer
00:06:46They used to scold and make us quiet
00:06:48But now
00:06:50The kid asks for a reason
00:06:52To explain to me
00:06:54What does this mean
00:06:56Otherwise I won't do it
00:06:58And secondly, he has respect
00:07:00You insulted me
00:07:02Now a days kids
00:07:04Are getting insulted
00:07:06They have become aware of their self respect
00:07:08We were not aware
00:07:10We were not
00:07:12There is a big difference
00:07:14If I ask you
00:07:16What is the difference
00:07:18Between your mother and you
00:07:20As a mother
00:07:22Can you tell us
00:07:24It's difficult to tell
00:07:26But I think
00:07:28Since I am thinking
00:07:30According to the times
00:07:32The way of thinking is different
00:07:34They are right
00:07:36We are right
00:07:38But the way of thinking
00:07:40Has changed
00:07:42My mother used to scold
00:07:44Sometimes she used to slap
00:07:46Now that is not the system
00:07:48Do you think
00:07:50There is a difference in strictness
00:07:52Now you have to explain
00:07:54To the kids
00:07:56Earlier it was not like this
00:07:58You are a strict mother
00:08:00Yes
00:08:02When you met me
00:08:04And talked about the kids
00:08:06What is the difference
00:08:08Between your mother and you
00:08:10As a parent
00:08:12I would like to add
00:08:14Like Sunita said
00:08:16There is a difference
00:08:18But the basic things
00:08:20Have not changed
00:08:22Your upbringing
00:08:24My mother was very strict
00:08:26With me
00:08:28Even though I was the only daughter
00:08:30It's not like
00:08:32Standing with a stick
00:08:34She always
00:08:36Applied her principles
00:08:38I used to feel bad
00:08:40Sleep on time
00:08:42Eat on time
00:08:44Take care of cleanliness
00:08:46But now I understand
00:08:48How important it is
00:08:50Sometimes
00:08:52If you explain
00:08:54To the kids
00:08:56They get annoyed
00:08:58You have given a lot of advice
00:09:00But I would say
00:09:02Apply it
00:09:04If you don't apply it
00:09:06They will not be able to take care of their kids
00:09:08Do you have to take a shower
00:09:10Sleep on time
00:09:12Overall
00:09:14Timing
00:09:16Principle
00:09:18Etiquette
00:09:20I know you know everything
00:09:22But you don't get everything on google
00:09:24Sit with the elders
00:09:26No matter how old the kids are
00:09:28They can't be older than the parents
00:09:30So what the parents can teach
00:09:32What the parents can teach
00:09:34I think
00:09:36Nowadays
00:09:38Kids have gadgets
00:09:40They know everything
00:09:42But still
00:09:44I feel
00:09:46Strictness is very important
00:09:48My observation is
00:09:50When we are advising
00:09:52The kids
00:09:54Even though
00:09:56They are
00:09:58A little offended
00:10:00What do you call it?
00:10:02They are annoyed
00:10:04But
00:10:06There is something
00:10:08In their mind
00:10:10I have experienced it
00:10:12When I was at their age
00:10:14I didn't express my annoyance
00:10:16But I used to feel it
00:10:18When mom used to give a lecture
00:10:20But that lecture
00:10:22Went somewhere
00:10:24There is a mind
00:10:26In which
00:10:28It got fed
00:10:30Like kids say
00:10:32But we didn't stop
00:10:34We will keep saying
00:10:36Because we know
00:10:38At some point
00:10:40These things will come
00:10:42So we can't sit quietly
00:10:44Kids these days express
00:10:46We were introverts
00:10:48We used to be quiet
00:10:50Kids these days
00:10:52Answer quickly
00:10:54They know how to say no
00:10:56We don't have to say no
00:10:58They know
00:11:00We don't have to say yes
00:11:02If we don't want to go to family weddings
00:11:04They used to take us
00:11:06Today we can't
00:11:08Take them
00:11:10I feel
00:11:12Mom and dad did a good thing
00:11:14When they are not there
00:11:16Mom is not there
00:11:18I know their relatives
00:11:20I don't feel ashamed
00:11:22If I meet someone
00:11:24With a smile
00:11:26I know they are my relatives
00:11:28When you go to a wedding
00:11:30You know how to meet
00:11:32Your relatives
00:11:34You know
00:11:36How to meet
00:11:38How to celebrate
00:11:40My kids go with a lot of excitement
00:11:42That's a good thing
00:11:44They are different
00:11:46They go with excitement
00:11:48They are people's person
00:11:50They get excited
00:11:52Daughter gets excited
00:11:54Do you feel different
00:11:56About your mom and parenting
00:11:58There is a big difference
00:12:00I think mom was very simple
00:12:02They were very simple
00:12:04They had a lot of
00:12:06Rules and regulations
00:12:08They used to follow
00:12:10Rules
00:12:12Kids used to follow
00:12:14Rules automatically
00:12:16We were not allowed
00:12:18To say no
00:12:20Kids these days
00:12:22Say no
00:12:24We are given freedom
00:12:26To say what we want
00:12:28There is a lot of difference
00:12:30In today's world
00:12:32Let's divide things
00:12:34For example
00:12:36The most important role in parenting
00:12:38Is education
00:12:40When they are young
00:12:42We have to make them understand
00:12:44That they have to study
00:12:46Because no kid wants to go to school
00:12:48Maximum kids
00:12:50Waking up in the morning
00:12:52We have to teach them
00:12:54About education
00:12:56I will ask you three
00:12:58Different questions
00:13:00About education
00:13:02How was your mom with you
00:13:04And how are you with your kids
00:13:06Sunita you tell
00:13:08First of all
00:13:10I will ask Sarma
00:13:12In studies
00:13:14Mom and dad never taught me
00:13:16I have always studied tuitions
00:13:18But they were strict
00:13:20It was very strict
00:13:22To study
00:13:24But I would like to add
00:13:26In mom's time
00:13:28My mom's time
00:13:30All the mothers
00:13:32Were housewives
00:13:34They used to give 100%
00:13:36To their kids
00:13:38In today's mothers
00:13:40It is not like that
00:13:42Because
00:13:44They are busy
00:13:46They work
00:13:48There is a lot of difference
00:13:50And now
00:13:52Mothers don't have that power
00:13:54To make food
00:13:56So kids are more
00:13:58Interested in outside things
00:14:00Earlier mothers used to do more
00:14:02At home
00:14:04So this is a big difference
00:14:06I would like to ask about studies
00:14:08Was your mom strict
00:14:10About studies
00:14:12My father was very sweet
00:14:14But mom was strict
00:14:16She used to tell me
00:14:18That I have to study
00:14:20What was her attitude
00:14:22When she got bad results
00:14:24She was not harsh
00:14:26But she used to say
00:14:28Your first priority
00:14:30Is your education
00:14:32You have to get
00:14:34Your degrees
00:14:36And certificates
00:14:38It is very important
00:14:40You will see what happens
00:14:42But you have to study first
00:14:44Whether it is old or new
00:14:46Every parent
00:14:48Wants their child to study
00:14:50You didn't get my question
00:14:52For example
00:14:54My mom
00:14:56Told me to take science
00:14:58Because you will get a lot of options
00:15:00You get a selection
00:15:02About arts, commerce, science
00:15:04What to do
00:15:06If you are doing it from
00:15:08Sindh board or Petal board
00:15:10Or O levels
00:15:12And
00:15:14At that time
00:15:16Children's age is like
00:15:18Their friends
00:15:20So my mom and dad
00:15:22Forced me to take science
00:15:24So that you get a lot of options
00:15:26Because after science
00:15:28You can do arts
00:15:30But after arts
00:15:32You can't do science
00:15:34My mom put pressure on us
00:15:36And we did it
00:15:38But this is still there
00:15:40I was a different parent
00:15:42My kids told me
00:15:44We have to do this
00:15:46I opposed my husband
00:15:48And convinced him
00:15:50And I let my kids do
00:15:52What they wanted
00:15:54This was the difference
00:15:56Between me and my mom
00:15:58About education
00:16:00I just wanted to say
00:16:02Your kids are grown up
00:16:04They have gone out to study
00:16:06I am in grade 8
00:16:08My kids are in grade 7
00:16:10I have to guide them
00:16:12I tell them
00:16:14Science has a lot of options
00:16:16You can do a lot
00:16:18That's why
00:16:20I am telling them
00:16:22That you have to opt
00:16:24For science
00:16:26But by the time
00:16:28They reach O levels
00:16:30When they have to
00:16:32Select
00:16:34I will listen to them
00:16:36But they are not
00:16:38At the right age
00:16:40You are right
00:16:42You have to show them
00:16:44The right path
00:16:46When they are young
00:16:48They don't have the brain
00:16:50The way they talk
00:16:52Is different
00:16:54Parents used to say
00:16:56We have to do science
00:16:58I want to ask
00:17:00Now we call the kids
00:17:02We make them sit
00:17:04We tell them
00:17:06What do you think
00:17:08I think this
00:17:10If you do this
00:17:12It will be like this
00:17:14Then you have a discussion
00:17:16And then you reach a result
00:17:18It is the same
00:17:20That we want
00:17:22The kids to take science
00:17:24We have to try
00:17:26But we have to talk well
00:17:28It is the same
00:17:30Another difference
00:17:32Earlier
00:17:34Doctor, engineer
00:17:36MBA came later
00:17:38Doctor and engineer
00:17:40And parents used to think
00:17:42If they do both
00:17:44Their future
00:17:46Will be set
00:17:48Your parents know
00:17:50There are many options
00:17:52To make a career
00:17:54There are fast options
00:17:56There is an internet
00:17:58You type
00:18:00Everyone knows
00:18:02What will happen
00:18:04This is a change
00:18:06Kids say
00:18:08We know everything
00:18:10You don't know
00:18:12I tell them
00:18:14It is the age of computers
00:18:16They think
00:18:18Computers are dry
00:18:20We don't understand
00:18:22Half of it
00:18:24They say
00:18:26We don't want to do computers
00:18:28You have to take sciences
00:18:30AI
00:18:32You need education
00:18:34And skills
00:18:36We will come back
00:18:38We will cover education
00:18:40Then we will go to the next topic
00:18:42Good morning Pakistan
00:18:48Welcome
00:18:50Welcome back
00:18:52Today we are talking
00:18:54Our parenting
00:18:56It is different
00:18:58Like we are
00:19:00Raising our kids
00:19:02What is the difference
00:19:04There are different laws
00:19:06In every house
00:19:08Different things
00:19:10Followed
00:19:12I wanted to ask you
00:19:14What is the difference
00:19:16Between you and your mom
00:19:18There is a big difference
00:19:20Mom was not educated
00:19:22She didn't read Quran
00:19:24She was very strict
00:19:26To finish Quran
00:19:28To start and read
00:19:30There was a TV program
00:19:32In which kids used to read
00:19:34Mom used to make us sit
00:19:36To read and listen
00:19:38We used to read
00:19:40Mom was very strict
00:19:42In education
00:19:44You saw
00:19:46When I became a mother
00:19:48I wanted my kids to read Quran
00:19:50I used to make them study
00:19:52I made an effort
00:19:54To find a teacher
00:19:56To make them read Quran
00:19:58They read Quran
00:20:00At an early age
00:20:02It helps
00:20:04Your parents
00:20:06We are just like our mom
00:20:08What changed
00:20:10Between you and your mom
00:20:12What was the difference
00:20:14Obviously mom
00:20:16Was not aware
00:20:18And dad
00:20:20Was not involved
00:20:22Dad was more involved
00:20:24Mom used to do everything
00:20:26In your time
00:20:28We used to decide
00:20:30Which school
00:20:32We used to mutually decide
00:20:34Which school
00:20:36Which tuition
00:20:38It is easier for us
00:20:40If I talk about
00:20:42The difference
00:20:44In earlier times
00:20:46Either dad
00:20:48Used to look after the education
00:20:50If mom was not educated
00:20:52Dad used to decide
00:20:54Which institute
00:20:56Which school
00:20:58What fees
00:21:00They can afford
00:21:02There was an understanding
00:21:04Now there is
00:21:06In my time
00:21:08My mom was educated
00:21:10Working
00:21:12If I talk about general mothers
00:21:14There was not much
00:21:16In institute selection
00:21:18But your mom was educated
00:21:20Your mom used to do more
00:21:22Dad used to live abroad
00:21:24He was not aware
00:21:26Mom used to do everything
00:21:28There were two extremes
00:21:30Either mom had it
00:21:32Or dad had it
00:21:34You mutually decide
00:21:36In today's time
00:21:38Wives force their fathers
00:21:40To go to parent teacher meeting
00:21:42It is important for parents to go
00:21:44Even in school
00:21:48They take both numbers
00:21:50They don't just call their mothers
00:21:52They call their fathers
00:21:54And complain
00:21:56They get emails
00:21:58From both
00:22:00Faisal made kids
00:22:02Habit of reading
00:22:04I made kids
00:22:06Habit of reading Quran
00:22:08I forced them
00:22:10From religious point of view
00:22:12I forced them
00:22:14Faisal forced me
00:22:18If we look at your life
00:22:20Your parenting
00:22:22Was done by husband and wife
00:22:24I think it is easier
00:22:26We are in ease
00:22:28We have to take care of kids
00:22:30There was no internet
00:22:32There was no social media
00:22:34Sometimes you become guilt free
00:22:36When both have a decision
00:22:38God forbid
00:22:40When you have decided
00:22:42You have decided
00:22:44For example
00:22:46My husband didn't let me change
00:22:48The school of my kids
00:22:50It was very strict
00:22:52I used to interfere
00:22:54My kids used to cry
00:22:56The school is better now
00:22:58Yes
00:23:00Now Sana's kids go
00:23:02It has changed
00:23:04When I ask my husband
00:23:06To take a stand
00:23:08In his childhood
00:23:10He had this trauma
00:23:12That his school has changed
00:23:14He said
00:23:16The school should not change
00:23:18It should be the same
00:23:20He had this trauma
00:23:22When his kids read from there
00:23:24I told him that it was the right decision
00:23:26I didn't want to change the school
00:23:28I am sorry
00:23:30I will defer
00:23:32Hassan's father
00:23:34Was in the air force
00:23:36His school used to change
00:23:40Now I feel
00:23:42Hassan has so many friends
00:23:44Wherever he used to go
00:23:46He used to be in the air force
00:23:48He used to make new friends
00:23:50At that time
00:23:52Air force schools were not good
00:23:54Parents helped him a lot
00:23:56But
00:23:58It helped him to socialize
00:24:00Making new friends
00:24:02Became easy
00:24:04Hassan's personality
00:24:06Was people's choice
00:24:08When kids change
00:24:10They get disturbed
00:24:12It affects their personality
00:24:14Like I get sad
00:24:16When I change the school
00:24:18That's why
00:24:20When I tell my son
00:24:22The price of dollar has increased
00:24:24I ask him to take a stand
00:24:26My school didn't change
00:24:28It's a trauma for kids
00:24:30Adjustment is very difficult
00:24:32The second option
00:24:34Food
00:24:36Kids' first food
00:24:38It's the most difficult
00:24:40Our mothers
00:24:42Had a different thinking
00:24:44Our mothers were different
00:24:46They used to feed us everything
00:24:48Our mothers were like this
00:24:50They used to feed us
00:24:52They didn't say anything
00:24:54They used to tell us to eat
00:24:56Or else we will go to hell
00:24:58We are not like this
00:25:00Let's talk about food
00:25:02My kids still have a lot of tantrums
00:25:04All three are different
00:25:06Very different
00:25:08People say
00:25:10How long will you do it
00:25:12If you don't eat
00:25:14If you are hungry
00:25:16You will eat
00:25:18What did you do with your kids
00:25:20I was very simple
00:25:22We used to eat whatever was cooked
00:25:24My mother used to cook
00:25:26There was nothing like this
00:25:28It's the same thing
00:25:30You will make your kids do it
00:25:32That's how it is
00:25:34If she used to scold me
00:25:36I would tell my kids
00:25:38You are free
00:25:40I try to cook
00:25:42Whatever is cooked
00:25:44My kids will eat
00:25:46When they are hungry
00:25:48We should make them do it
00:25:50We had a rule
00:25:52Once in a month
00:25:54We will go out to eat
00:25:56We couldn't go everyday
00:25:58There was no concept of home delivery
00:26:00We had lentils
00:26:02Whether they like it or not
00:26:04Vegetables
00:26:06Menu
00:26:08We had to do it
00:26:10What to do
00:26:12I have seen my kids
00:26:14They are from three different planets
00:26:16When they are hungry
00:26:18They eat
00:26:20It's a good thing
00:26:22We don't make them party
00:26:24Let's start from childhood
00:26:26Like
00:26:28Our mothers
00:26:30They must have made khichdi for us
00:26:32They must have fed us
00:26:34We had baby food
00:26:36We fed them
00:26:38We had to mix
00:26:40Powdered milk
00:26:42Tell us about that difference
00:26:44What did you do
00:26:46What did they do
00:26:48I am a very desi woman
00:26:50I have raised my kids in a desi way
00:26:52Mostly
00:26:54Home made food
00:26:56My mother-in-law's
00:26:58Like
00:27:00Semolina
00:27:02Fruits
00:27:04I used to avoid those
00:27:06Because
00:27:08Children should have a strong base
00:27:10When they grow up
00:27:12At least their immune system should not get damaged
00:27:14Mothers save their life
00:27:16Short cut
00:27:18But later
00:27:20There is a problem
00:27:22Children get sick
00:27:24Digestion
00:27:26Growth stops
00:27:28The more you raise your kids in a desi way
00:27:30The more home made food
00:27:32Your kids will be strong
00:27:34I have seen that
00:27:36What was the difference
00:27:38In our house
00:27:40Food was made
00:27:42Meat and vegetables
00:27:44Every day
00:27:46There was a dish
00:27:48I think
00:27:50At the age of 8-9
00:27:52I did not eat vegetables
00:27:54You used to eat meat and leave vegetables
00:27:56Yes
00:27:58At the age of 8-9
00:28:00One day I tasted it
00:28:02I started liking it
00:28:04I got interested
00:28:06I got used to meat and vegetables
00:28:08I wanted some vegetables
00:28:10We got married
00:28:12Hassan's family
00:28:14Was very different
00:28:16Hassan's father does not eat vegetables
00:28:18He only eats meat
00:28:20In his family
00:28:22One meat
00:28:24One lentil
00:28:26And one vegetable
00:28:28I do not understand vegetables
00:28:30I should eat soup
00:28:34I got used to it
00:28:38Sometimes my mother-in-law
00:28:40Used to cook for me
00:28:42She used to cook for me
00:28:44When I was a kid
00:28:48At the age of 6
00:28:50I fed my kids everything
00:28:52Every vegetable
00:28:54Except bitter gourd
00:28:56I fed them every vegetable
00:28:58Because I used to feed them
00:29:00Then I realized
00:29:02They have grown up
00:29:04Their timings have changed
00:29:06They eat at the same time
00:29:08We eat at 8 at night
00:29:10We sit at the table
00:29:12And eat together
00:29:14At that time
00:29:16We do not use gadgets
00:29:18We do not even bring phones
00:29:20We sit for half an hour
00:29:22And eat together
00:29:24When the kids came to the table
00:29:26I told them to eat
00:29:28When they started eating
00:29:30I told them what is this
00:29:32They did not eat
00:29:34They left the vegetables
00:29:36They were eating meat
00:29:38It has an effect
00:29:40On the genes
00:29:42Because Hassan's father only eats meat
00:29:44For some time
00:29:46I thought they will show
00:29:48On the table
00:29:50But now
00:29:52They do not touch the vegetables
00:29:54We have one lentil
00:29:56One meat salad
00:29:58And one vegetable
00:30:00We get up and bring the plate
00:30:02We put our food
00:30:04We do not dine out
00:30:06Sometimes after 3-4 months
00:30:08Because
00:30:10The kids have their own parties
00:30:12They eat pizza
00:30:14Once in a week
00:30:16I make pasta
00:30:18Sometimes spaghetti
00:30:20We do not go out
00:30:22Do you have home deliveries?
00:30:24The kids do not like it
00:30:26We will do it
00:30:28The kids do it themselves
00:30:30We have ordered
00:30:32They do not have this system
00:30:34They are not used to it
00:30:36They do not think about it
00:30:38You have to make a system
00:30:40It is not like
00:30:42If the kids say
00:30:44You have to do it
00:30:46When Hassan and I order
00:30:48They go to sleep
00:30:50They do not know
00:30:52They do not have the concept
00:30:54That we have to order
00:30:56They do not know
00:30:58They know
00:31:00That we do not allow
00:31:02They are eating meat
00:31:04But they are eating home made
00:31:06Roti, rice, meat, cucumber
00:31:08Milk, eggs
00:31:10They are not eating vegetables
00:31:12They will eat
00:31:14I started
00:31:16When I was 10-12
00:31:18I started
00:31:20My son did not eat biryani
00:31:22He started eating it with his friends
00:31:24One day
00:31:26He will start eating
00:31:28With his friends
00:31:30People are becoming vegan
00:31:32I do not
00:31:34Pressure them
00:31:36In the beginning
00:31:38I used to eat their food
00:31:40One day
00:31:42I started
00:31:44To eat vegetables
00:31:46They started
00:31:48My daughter
00:31:50Started eating vegetables
00:31:52I was shocked
00:31:54I used to eat
00:31:56Taste buds change
00:31:58After 7 years
00:32:00Your taste buds change
00:32:02You start liking
00:32:04Something you did not like
00:32:06I think
00:32:08You should give time to your kids
00:32:10It is surprising
00:32:12For many people
00:32:14How kids are eating vegetables
00:32:16I did not eat vegetables
00:32:18I ate it after marriage
00:32:20My husband likes it
00:32:22So I ate it
00:32:24My mother put it in Chinese
00:32:26I was a picky eater
00:32:28My mother
00:32:30To feed me vegetables
00:32:32Started making it in Chinese
00:32:34I used to like it in Chinese
00:32:36Then
00:32:38I started liking okra
00:32:40Okra
00:32:42We used to write
00:32:44Our favorite food
00:32:46Was bitter gourd
00:32:48Okra
00:32:50Okra
00:32:52We used to write it
00:32:54It became my favorite
00:32:56One spinach and one bitter gourd
00:32:58It is my favorite
00:33:00We make a big mistake
00:33:02In front of kids
00:33:04They will ask
00:33:06What is this?
00:33:08No one eats vegetables like this
00:33:10We make it little by little
00:33:12We boil it
00:33:14Many people are eating salad
00:33:16When kids go out
00:33:18They get shocked
00:33:20What do we do with eggplant?
00:33:22What do we do with potato?
00:33:24They ask
00:33:26What was the difference in your family?
00:33:28How did your mother feed you?
00:33:30You were siblings
00:33:32My mother used to
00:33:34Make a lot of effort
00:33:36She used to make delicious food
00:33:38Chutney, salad
00:33:40She used to make a lot of effort
00:33:42When I joined my family
00:33:44There was a lot of trend
00:33:46This food, that food
00:33:48You used to focus on
00:33:50Your mother-in-law
00:33:52Your husband
00:33:54When Anam happened
00:33:56You used to try to be a mother
00:33:58You used to say
00:34:00I want to feed my baby
00:34:02I want to feed this
00:34:04In those days
00:34:06Mothers used to follow the trend
00:34:08They used to make simple food
00:34:10When I became a mother
00:34:12Everyone was feeding baby
00:34:14I did the same
00:34:16I wanted to do the same
00:34:18You are troubling me
00:34:20You are bringing baby food
00:34:22That baby food
00:34:24The baby likes banana flavor
00:34:26Or mango flavor
00:34:28But mango is short now
00:34:30He will come from London
00:34:32My life was difficult
00:34:34I made it
00:34:36When I gave a small
00:34:38Khichdi to my baby
00:34:40Or banana
00:34:42Whatever you are eating
00:34:44It has power
00:34:46I don't want any tension
00:34:48Since childhood
00:34:50I fed him something
00:34:52You developed this word
00:34:54Yes
00:34:56I fed him
00:34:58He ate
00:35:00My life became easy
00:35:02When I was a mother
00:35:04I used to feed my baby
00:35:06I used to make simple food
00:35:08I used to make a lot of effort
00:35:10I used to make a lot of effort
00:35:12I used to make a lot of effort
00:35:14My mom used to make khichdi
00:35:16Everyday
00:35:18This has strong immunity
00:35:20You have st forged
00:35:22Now I
00:35:24With the kids
00:35:26I try to
00:35:28What do the kids like
00:35:30I boil my own food
00:35:32I boil my own food
00:35:34I say let's make pasta
00:35:36I say let's make pasta
00:35:38She prepares
00:35:40She prepares
00:35:42Kids are very popular. They say, if there's a cheesy handi, add something else to it.
00:35:48I say, no, it should be cheesy. I say, let's make it together. It's fun.
00:35:53There are a lot of differences between today and the past.
00:35:58We weren't allowed to go to the kitchen. My mom wouldn't let us.
00:36:01My dad would let me go and make something. My mom said, no, it shouldn't be a mess.
00:36:06I said, no, I'm sleeping. You guys learn. You should know.
00:36:10We crave for their bonding.
00:36:14My mom used to tell me to go and sit there.
00:36:17We used to be clingy. We crave for their bonding.
00:36:20Because they have a lot of things that can help them get rid of their boredom.
00:36:27We used to have our mom's dupatta. We used to hold it.
00:36:32We are good listeners. We are good parents.
00:36:35We understand. We listen. Our parents don't listen.
00:36:38We say, it's done. This is a big difference.
00:36:43Let's watch Good Morning Pakistan after a short break.
00:36:54Welcome. Welcome back to Good Morning Pakistan.
00:36:57Let's talk about parenting.
00:36:59We are those lucky mothers who haven't gone through something abnormal.
00:37:08We are going through something normal that we are able to take care of our kids.
00:37:13But there are a lot of mothers who go through a lot of difficulties.
00:37:17Especially when their kids are teenagers.
00:37:19I would like to add one thing.
00:37:22There was a trend in the olden days to not teach girls.
00:37:27You have to study. You have to cook.
00:37:30You have to get married. You have to study.
00:37:34It's very important to change this mindset.
00:37:37Because the house that a woman makes, the man is working outside.
00:37:42If you leave that work to the man, imagine how much pressure he has.
00:37:48The husband and wife have to work together.
00:37:52That's why it's very important for a woman to be educated.
00:37:56I think a woman's education is more important than a man's.
00:37:59Absolutely.
00:38:00So this should be taught to mothers as well as their daughters.
00:38:05Because the mindset of daughters used to be the same.
00:38:08What do you have to do? You have to study and get married.
00:38:10You are a very independent girl.
00:38:12And now she says a lot that we should be financially independent.
00:38:16But there are still some houses in villages.
00:38:18They have the same mindset.
00:38:20When there are families in villages who have limited money,
00:38:24they say why should we invest in daughters?
00:38:27Why not invest in sons?
00:38:29That's the mindset.
00:38:30That's the mindset. We have to change that.
00:38:32Right?
00:38:33I have a woman with me behind the curtain who doesn't want to show her face.
00:38:38But she will share her problem here.
00:38:41Yes.
00:38:42Greetings. Who is with us?
00:38:43Sidra.
00:38:44Greetings.
00:38:45Yes, Sidra.
00:38:47Nida, my problem is that, like we are,
00:38:52we have never spoken to our parents in a loud voice.
00:38:57Whatever they say, we still do it the same way.
00:39:01Whatever they taught us, the way they brought us up,
00:39:04whatever they say, their words still mean a lot to us.
00:39:07My husband is so old,
00:39:09he still doesn't have the courage to say anything in front of his father.
00:39:14Whatever they say, we bow our heads and listen to them.
00:39:18But my own son is 13 years old.
00:39:21I am so worried because of him.
00:39:24He misbehaves so much,
00:39:26he misbehaves so much that we can't make him understand anything.
00:39:30Say something to him.
00:39:32He speaks in such a way,
00:39:34like my husband should make him understand,
00:39:37that son, don't misbehave like this.
00:39:40If he fights with someone in school,
00:39:43if there is a fight,
00:39:44till the time he doesn't get beaten up,
00:39:47till the time he doesn't get beaten up,
00:39:50till the time he doesn't get beaten up,
00:39:52he doesn't get peace.
00:39:53He won't be able to come home and take revenge on his younger siblings.
00:39:59If my husband makes him understand,
00:40:01then he takes out his eyes,
00:40:03gets more angry than him,
00:40:05and tells him that I have to do this work.
00:40:09He is not ready to listen.
00:40:10He doesn't know what to say.
00:40:12He doesn't know what to say.
00:40:14I am so worried because of his behavior.
00:40:17I don't understand his problem.
00:40:20If he wants money,
00:40:21there is a common sentence that he doesn't have money.
00:40:24You don't give money in your hand all the time,
00:40:26he never refused.
00:40:28He will tell him to take money from someone.
00:40:31If he doesn't have money,
00:40:32he can take money from his friend.
00:40:33But he should do as I say.
00:40:35My husband and I are so worried.
00:40:38I want my son to be like my husband.
00:40:43But he is not like that.
00:40:46He is very mischievous.
00:40:47He gets angry at everything.
00:40:49Have you checked his friends?
00:40:51In which company is he working?
00:40:53In which company is he sitting?
00:40:54Because in this age,
00:40:55children are so impressed with their friends.
00:40:58And if this is not happening in your house,
00:41:00your father speaks to his parents very politely.
00:41:07This means he is learning from someone else.
00:41:10He needs counselling.
00:41:13Because such aggressive behavior is not in vain.
00:41:18There is something,
00:41:20there is some trauma,
00:41:21something is triggering him,
00:41:23there is some grudge in his heart.
00:41:26And he is expressing it with anger.
00:41:29Exactly.
00:41:30Since childhood,
00:41:32he has been seeing something in the house
00:41:34that has tolerated him.
00:41:36And now at this age,
00:41:38he is expressing his grudge.
00:41:40We think that therapy is wrong.
00:41:42But this is the same thing.
00:41:44That thing is washed out of your mind.
00:41:46Whatever it is,
00:41:48for example,
00:41:49if a child gets sick,
00:41:51then you should get him therapy.
00:41:53Okay, one minute.
00:41:54I would like to connect with the common people here.
00:41:57The common people who are watching us,
00:41:59they don't get a lot of therapy.
00:42:01If we ask this question now,
00:42:03how should parents tackle this behavior?
00:42:07So,
00:42:08the answer is,
00:42:10I think,
00:42:12first of all,
00:42:14his child will not listen to his parents.
00:42:18Only a third person will have to get involved
00:42:21to make him understand what the problem is.
00:42:24Because this is the root of the problem.
00:42:26Otherwise, children don't get aggressive for no reason.
00:42:29I don't think that your child,
00:42:31like your husband,
00:42:33he has always listened to his family.
00:42:37He has always suppressed.
00:42:39I don't think that your son has ever felt
00:42:41that he always agrees to the wrong things.
00:42:43Sometimes it happens.
00:42:45And for that child,
00:42:47that thing is unacceptable.
00:42:49He is saying wrong things.
00:42:51Why is my father agreeing to that?
00:42:53Sometimes it happens because your mindset is different.
00:42:55That child is a new generation.
00:42:57You should try to read his mind.
00:43:00And like he said in the beginning,
00:43:02my husband has been so obedient,
00:43:05that he has never said no.
00:43:07The thing is,
00:43:09sometimes your parents
00:43:11may say something wrong.
00:43:14It happens.
00:43:16But at that time,
00:43:18you didn't have the courage
00:43:20to say wrong things to your parents.
00:43:22So, you used to keep quiet.
00:43:24But that child is watching.
00:43:26Yes, the child is watching.
00:43:28Now, if he thinks that
00:43:30he is doing something wrong,
00:43:32he doesn't have the courage
00:43:34to talk to his father.
00:43:36Why? Because he has seen his father
00:43:38agreeing to everything.
00:43:40Now, because the children
00:43:42have become different,
00:43:44people think that
00:43:46these children are ill-mannered.
00:43:48They are not ill-mannered.
00:43:50They are talking about their rights.
00:43:52Exactly. They are talking about their rights.
00:43:54But our children
00:43:56never talk to me
00:43:58in a loud voice.
00:44:00They talk calmly.
00:44:02So, there is a way and a way.
00:44:04It happens in every home.
00:44:06You can check at home
00:44:08if something is lagging.
00:44:10And there may be a problem
00:44:12with the school.
00:44:14Sometimes a child is bullying.
00:44:16The teacher doesn't even know.
00:44:18So, it is very important
00:44:20to understand the problem of the child.
00:44:22Every child is different.
00:44:24Every child's personality is different.
00:44:26Some children can't be suppressed.
00:44:28They say that we have to speak.
00:44:30If something is wrong, we will speak wrongly.
00:44:32And we should talk about our rights.
00:44:34Another thing.
00:44:36Do you know?
00:44:38Ill-mannered children were also there in those days.
00:44:40Not only in today's time.
00:44:42In those days, there were
00:44:44children of different personalities.
00:44:46And if you have 4-5 children,
00:44:48their personalities are different.
00:44:50We are not talking about today's time.
00:44:52We have heard about earlier times.
00:44:54My father had 5 brothers and sisters.
00:44:56My father was the youngest.
00:44:58We heard that his personality was very strong.
00:45:00Because his personality was like that.
00:45:02His brothers were
00:45:04ill-mannered.
00:45:06They were not heard so much at home.
00:45:08So, someone's personality
00:45:10is different.
00:45:12Check the relationship
00:45:14of a 13-year-old child.
00:45:16There are 3-4 things
00:45:18If they are not going to therapy,
00:45:20at least you should go to counselling.
00:45:22And you as a parent, ask
00:45:24a counsellor who will help you professionally.
00:45:26Maybe he will give you better
00:45:28advice than us.
00:45:30Definitely, he will give you better advice than us.
00:45:32And this is also the age.
00:45:34Teenagers
00:45:36have a lot of fights.
00:45:38The body shape of boys changes.
00:45:40Face changes.
00:45:42They fight.
00:45:44Hormones change.
00:45:46For example,
00:45:48when my son was 13 years old,
00:45:50I used to
00:45:52not let him go out.
00:45:54I used to
00:45:56not let him go out.
00:45:58I used to tell him not to abuse.
00:46:00I used to tell him not to touch me.
00:46:02My husband used to get worried.
00:46:04He used to tell me that
00:46:06he used to become his friend.
00:46:08I used to tell him that I will not be his friend.
00:46:10He abused me.
00:46:12I used to have a
00:46:14counsellor.
00:46:16I personally asked him what should I do?
00:46:18I don't know how to raise a boy.
00:46:20My husband used to tell me that you don't know how to raise a boy.
00:46:22My husband used to tell me that you don't know how to raise a boy.
00:46:24He told me to make him understand
00:46:26that he is not allowed to abuse you.
00:46:28If someone else is abusing you,
00:46:30then you can't be cut off from the world.
00:46:32You can't be like this.
00:46:34If someone is doing something bad,
00:46:36then you have to sit quietly.
00:46:38You have to go to that world.
00:46:40You don't have to let it affect you.
00:46:42You have to survive.
00:46:44Slowly, we started taking him out.
00:46:46We started playing cricket with him.
00:46:48We made him understand
00:46:50that this is a bad thing.
00:46:52This is a good thing.
00:46:5413 years is a very dangerous age.
00:46:56My son is also 13 years old.
00:46:58From the age of 13 to 21,
00:47:00it is a very dangerous age.
00:47:02It is a very dangerous age.
00:47:04I agree that your family
00:47:06and your parents
00:47:08live in a very civilized environment.
00:47:10You have to come to your son's age
00:47:12and his level
00:47:14and talk to him.
00:47:16Another thing is
00:47:18that you shouldn't leave him alone.
00:47:20Sometimes,
00:47:22there is a rift
00:47:24between a father and a son.
00:47:26Especially at this age.
00:47:28At this age.
00:47:30Mothers can tolerate it
00:47:32but fathers can't.
00:47:34They can't tolerate
00:47:36how their son has come out.
00:47:38Mothers have to build a bridge
00:47:40between a husband and a son
00:47:42so that
00:47:44their son doesn't cease fire.
00:47:48That's why we say
00:47:50that women need education.
00:47:54If they are educated,
00:47:56they will be able to tackle
00:47:58this rift
00:48:00through parenting.
00:48:02If they are not educated,
00:48:04they won't have awareness.
00:48:06They won't know how to talk.
00:48:08It is a very dangerous task.
00:48:12This age is very dangerous.
00:48:14Please try to
00:48:16go to a therapist
00:48:18for counselling.
00:48:20They will give you the best advice.
00:48:22But first, you should go for counselling.
00:48:24I think counselling is a mindset
00:48:26that you can go
00:48:28and do it yourself.
00:48:30Common people don't go for counselling.
00:48:32We are tired of saying it.
00:48:34It is a big problem
00:48:36that counselling is very difficult.
00:48:38It is expensive.
00:48:40You get appointments
00:48:42after 6 months.
00:48:44It is a big problem.
00:48:48Everyone is busy with counselling.
00:48:50As I was telling you,
00:48:52there are so many mental health issues
00:48:54that people are dealing with.
00:48:58Another important thing is
00:49:00what food are you cooking?
00:49:02Are you eating a lot of meat?
00:49:06Earlier, we didn't know these things.
00:49:08Now, we know that
00:49:10sugar intake
00:49:12and other things
00:49:14can trigger
00:49:16anger issues.
00:49:20You should find out
00:49:22the root of the problem.
00:49:24You can't scold them.
00:49:26You have to work hard.
00:49:28You have to work hard.
00:49:30You can't scold them.
00:49:32If you scold an aggressive child,
00:49:34he will become more aggressive.
00:49:40There are so many restrictions
00:49:42in today's world.
00:49:46What is in your mind?
00:49:48For example,
00:49:50there was a time when
00:49:52boys didn't stay outside
00:49:54even after 9 pm.
00:49:56They didn't stay outside
00:49:58even after Maghrib.
00:50:00My children are young.
00:50:02Obviously,
00:50:04they don't stay outside
00:50:06even after Maghrib.
00:50:08Before Maghrib Azan,
00:50:10they would run
00:50:12so fast
00:50:14that when they reach home,
00:50:16they would yell.
00:50:18I would tell them to drink water
00:50:20before praying.
00:50:22They are still young.
00:50:24I don't know
00:50:26how to handle
00:50:28a 19-20 year old boy.
00:50:30It is difficult.
00:50:34I feel that
00:50:36parents have to
00:50:38change their character
00:50:40like a cricket.
00:50:42Parents have to
00:50:44become friends,
00:50:46teachers,
00:50:48and children.
00:50:50Children know
00:50:52what parents don't know.
00:50:54But if parents know
00:50:56in their ego that
00:50:58they know everything.
00:51:00My children
00:51:02must be hearing
00:51:04my technique.
00:51:06Sometimes,
00:51:08we have to be children
00:51:10because they know
00:51:12more things than us.
00:51:14That's why
00:51:16today's parents
00:51:18shouldn't be strict.
00:51:20They have to tell
00:51:22their children
00:51:24that this is their limit.
00:51:26Yes, boys and girls are friends.
00:51:28But this is your limit.
00:51:30We don't have permission
00:51:32in our house.
00:51:34You can't do that.
00:51:36Children know their limits.
00:51:38Your house has different limitations.
00:51:40My house has different limitations.
00:51:42Sunita, your family has different limitations.
00:51:44Children say that
00:51:46their parents give them permission.
00:51:48This is a big problem.
00:51:50My children say that
00:51:52even after Maghrib,
00:51:54they stay in the park.
00:51:56Why do you stop us?
00:51:58You have to teach your children
00:52:00since childhood
00:52:02how to come to their house.
00:52:04This doesn't happen in our house.
00:52:06I also say that this is the rule of our house.
00:52:08I tell my children
00:52:10to get used to hearing no.
00:52:12Because we say
00:52:14this is what we want.
00:52:16We have to do this.
00:52:18When you say no,
00:52:20it's not love.
00:52:22I am very friendly with my children.
00:52:24But when I get a call
00:52:26that you have to be at home
00:52:28after this time,
00:52:30I know where you are.
00:52:32I am in touch with my child's mother
00:52:34for 24 hours.
00:52:36So that I don't get
00:52:38a chance to cheat.
00:52:40So a mother has to be
00:52:42very alert.
00:52:44When my son goes for rowing,
00:52:46I tell him to message me
00:52:48whether he has reached or not.
00:52:50But he is so lazy.
00:52:52Then I have to call him.
00:52:54We will continue this.
00:52:56After a short break,
00:52:58we will talk about
00:53:00how important it is
00:53:02to learn and understand.
00:53:04Good morning Pakistan.
00:53:06Welcome.
00:53:08Welcome back.
00:53:10Good morning Pakistan.
00:53:12Today we will talk about
00:53:14parenting of children.
00:53:16Before we go,
00:53:18we will talk about
00:53:20how to impose
00:53:22restrictions on children.
00:53:24We will talk about this
00:53:26in this era.
00:53:28Sunita, your children are still young.
00:53:30But from childhood,
00:53:32no matter how old the child is,
00:53:34out of 100%,
00:53:36you should say yes
00:53:38at 80% and no at 20%.
00:53:40You should say no
00:53:42when it is very important.
00:53:44When you say no at that time,
00:53:46it loses its importance.
00:53:48So that your child knows
00:53:50that we are not being
00:53:52very strict.
00:53:54But this is something
00:53:56that we are not allowed to do.
00:53:58You are absolutely right.
00:54:00I also believe that
00:54:02but it is not like
00:54:04you don't have to say no to your child.
00:54:06You don't have the habit of
00:54:08saying no to your child.
00:54:10There are many households
00:54:12where there is a shortage of money.
00:54:14It is not a big deal
00:54:16to buy a toy for your child
00:54:18or to give more pocket money.
00:54:20But this thing
00:54:22keeps echoing in my ears
00:54:24that you should keep
00:54:26thirst in your child.
00:54:28If you don't keep thirst,
00:54:30it will lose its importance.
00:54:34So instead of saying
00:54:36to keep thirst,
00:54:38if you can do it,
00:54:40don't do it for some time.
00:54:42I think 50% yes
00:54:44and 50% no should be there.
00:54:46There should be a balance.
00:54:48So that the children
00:54:50take a lot of leverage
00:54:52and say yes.
00:54:54Because children are also
00:54:56very good blackmailers.
00:54:58We know that children
00:55:00are also very exploitative.
00:55:02They know where to exploit.
00:55:04Secondly,
00:55:06may Allah forgive us.
00:55:08May Allah save us all.
00:55:10Everyone's children are dangerous.
00:55:12Drugs and these things
00:55:14have become very common.
00:55:16Don't give your children
00:55:18a lot of pocket money.
00:55:20If you have a lot of money,
00:55:22then spend it.
00:55:24I have seen that parents
00:55:26give money to their children.
00:55:28It's wrong.
00:55:30No matter how much you earn,
00:55:32you have to spend it.
00:55:34My father used to say
00:55:36feed a gold spoon and
00:55:38look at the lion's eyes.
00:55:40It's the best thing.
00:55:42So I do this a lot
00:55:44that I say 50% yes
00:55:46and 50% no.
00:55:48And these things are such
00:55:50that in any era,
00:55:52even in 2050,
00:55:54this thing will be applicable.
00:55:56And what you are saying
00:55:58that where there is a lot of money
00:56:00coming and going, it doesn't matter.
00:56:02I have seen such people
00:56:04where they have everything.
00:56:06But there too,
00:56:08they have said that everything is valued.
00:56:10Like when children grow up,
00:56:12they say, okay,
00:56:14get the car fixed in the morning.
00:56:16No, I will go in the car.
00:56:18Come by bus or rickshaw or taxi.
00:56:20So that you know
00:56:22how to struggle.
00:56:24And this car,
00:56:26it's not ready-made,
00:56:28it's hard work.
00:56:30So I know such people
00:56:32whose fathers tell their children
00:56:34that I will go by car.
00:56:36So their children are very successful.
00:56:38When you give them
00:56:40strictness in the beginning,
00:56:42they get very comfortable in the future.
00:56:44They get used to it.
00:56:46Another thing is that
00:56:48if you have given them money,
00:56:50it's very important.
00:56:52What did you spend?
00:56:54What did you buy?
00:56:56Children who study in drugs,
00:56:58if they had so much money,
00:57:00they would have been able to buy it.
00:57:02Otherwise, without money,
00:57:04these things are not available.
00:57:06So obviously,
00:57:08all these things are very important.
00:57:10We have with us
00:57:12Erum in the confession box.
00:57:14Erum will tell us her problem.
00:57:16Assalamualaikum.
00:57:18My problem is
00:57:20that I have a daughter.
00:57:22My husband and wife put her
00:57:24in a very good school
00:57:26so that she gets good education.
00:57:28Now the problem is that
00:57:30the environment of our house is very religious.
00:57:32Obviously, they take scarves.
00:57:34We have been taught
00:57:36how to go out,
00:57:38how to wear a dupatta.
00:57:40Now my daughter is a little older.
00:57:42She is 14-15 years old.
00:57:44She has
00:57:46a very old mindset
00:57:48that she doesn't want to
00:57:50follow these things.
00:57:52She wants to wear jeans
00:57:54or go out
00:57:56without wearing a dupatta.
00:57:58I often tell her
00:58:00that if you want to wear jeans,
00:58:02then take a stroller.
00:58:04But she says that
00:58:06you don't have the sense of the new age.
00:58:08You don't understand.
00:58:10The environment has changed.
00:58:12I think we need more
00:58:14education.
00:58:16I am very worried
00:58:18about this.
00:58:20Obviously, there are problems
00:58:22in our house.
00:58:24They say that you don't
00:58:26guide her properly.
00:58:28She has to go to
00:58:30parties and
00:58:32circles.
00:58:34I don't want her to go
00:58:36because the environment
00:58:38of our house is not like that.
00:58:40There are arguments
00:58:42about this.
00:58:44I am very worried about this.
00:58:46I don't know how to explain
00:58:48this to her.
00:58:50She has to follow
00:58:52these things.
00:58:54She doesn't have the sense
00:58:56of the environment
00:58:58of our house.
00:59:00Our parents
00:59:02have taught us
00:59:04to wear a dupatta
00:59:06and go out
00:59:08without wearing a dupatta.
00:59:10She thinks that
00:59:12we have an old mind.
00:59:14We don't have the sense of the environment.
00:59:16This is the new age.
00:59:18We have to do all this.
00:59:20According to this time,
00:59:22in our house,
00:59:24there are arguments
00:59:26between husband and wife.
00:59:28My advice to you is
00:59:30that if you take her to extreme
00:59:32and explain her
00:59:34to do this,
00:59:36then you will be in trouble.
00:59:38If you find a solution
00:59:40to this,
00:59:42then
00:59:44the children will
00:59:46listen to you.
00:59:48They don't have to hide
00:59:50and do these things.
00:59:52They can wear a burqa
00:59:54and go out of your house
00:59:56to the extreme.
00:59:58That's why
01:00:00many girls are doing this.
01:00:02They go out of the house
01:00:04as their parents tell them
01:00:06and then they change
01:00:08because their parents
01:00:10don't recognize their daughters.
01:00:12You have to come
01:00:14to a middle ground
01:00:16and
01:00:18she has to come to a middle ground
01:00:20so that she doesn't
01:00:22come out of her house.
01:00:24What will you do if she
01:00:26hides from you?
01:00:28Islam wasn't spread on gunpoint.
01:00:30Love was spread out of love.
01:00:32You are right.
01:00:34But if she
01:00:36can't do it,
01:00:38then we can't force her to do it.
01:00:40But if she
01:00:42goes to a get-together
01:00:44then you should go with her.
01:00:46No matter what she wears,
01:00:48but you should go with her.
01:00:50I think there will come a time
01:00:52when she will understand herself.
01:00:54They say that
01:00:56it comes from above
01:00:58in your mind.
01:01:00It comes automatically.
01:01:02Otherwise,
01:01:04you don't do it.
01:01:06I think we don't make kids realize
01:01:08what is the purpose of wearing a dupatta.
01:01:10Why are we telling you to wear a dupatta?
01:01:12If you are going to a get-together
01:01:14and a girl is going alone
01:01:16to travel by bus,
01:01:18if she goes without a dupatta
01:01:20or if she doesn't dress properly,
01:01:22even if she doesn't have a dupatta,
01:01:24we have to give logic
01:01:26to the kids
01:01:28and make them understand
01:01:30why we are telling you to wear a dupatta.
01:01:32Diamonds are
01:01:34more precious
01:01:36than anything else.
01:01:38Most of the time,
01:01:40daughters feel that
01:01:42they have given freedom to their sons
01:01:44but not to them.
01:01:46So, we have to tell our daughters
01:01:48how precious they are to us.
01:01:50If you make them believe
01:01:52that they are precious to us,
01:01:54then we are protecting them
01:01:56so that no harm
01:01:58can happen to them.
01:02:00Obviously,
01:02:02we have to give them a sense of security
01:02:04and make them understand
01:02:06that they are protected
01:02:08by the law.
01:02:10Maybe they will understand
01:02:12but if you are strict
01:02:14then they will lie to you.
01:02:16In such a situation,
01:02:18you are a mother
01:02:20and you have to stand with your daughter
01:02:22as a friend.
01:02:24If you are with your in-laws
01:02:26then they will become your sisters-in-law.
01:02:28Try to make
01:02:30your husband understand
01:02:32this program
01:02:34because
01:02:36usually,
01:02:38husbands don't listen to their wives
01:02:40and don't understand
01:02:42what they are saying.
01:02:44But if they understand
01:02:46what the third wife is saying,
01:02:48then they will understand
01:02:50what the fourth wife is saying.
01:02:52The fourth generation
01:02:54has to be taught with a lot of love.
01:02:56The truth is that
01:02:58we are those parents
01:03:00who were scared of their parents
01:03:02and now we are scared of our children.
01:03:04We are that generation
01:03:06who are stuck in between.
01:03:08Yes, we are the stuck generation.
01:03:10And we are only scared
01:03:12that our children
01:03:14don't take any extreme step
01:03:16because this is happening these days.
01:03:18God forbid,
01:03:20they take such a step
01:03:22and we regret it.
01:03:24That's why we are scared of our children.
01:03:26Next, I have
01:03:28Saima with me.
01:03:30What does Saima say?
01:03:32What is her problem?
01:03:34Assalamualaikum.
01:03:36I wanted to talk about my daughter.
01:03:38My daughter is 15 years old
01:03:40and she is in 9th grade.
01:03:42I am very worried about her.
01:03:44Actually,
01:03:46I enrolled her in a school.
01:03:48She goes to school
01:03:50but she has
01:03:52a classmate
01:03:54with whom she has become friends.
01:03:56After that,
01:03:58I don't understand
01:04:00what is happening.
01:04:02She has met him
01:04:042-3 times.
01:04:06When I came to know about this,
01:04:08I was shocked.
01:04:10Where is my daughter going?
01:04:12I don't know
01:04:14where she is going.
01:04:16I don't know
01:04:18how she is cheating.
01:04:20She is in this condition
01:04:22at this age.
01:04:24She is very young.
01:04:26When I came to know about this,
01:04:28I tried to make her understand.
01:04:30I told her that she is going
01:04:32on the wrong path.
01:04:34She fought with me about this.
01:04:36I told her that it's nothing like that.
01:04:38It's not a bad thing to be friends.
01:04:40Along with friendship,
01:04:42I feel that
01:04:44this is not friendship.
01:04:46It's something else.
01:04:48She wants to make me
01:04:50her life partner.
01:04:52I don't understand
01:04:54how she is thinking
01:04:56at this age.
01:04:58When did you give her
01:05:00her mobile phone?
01:05:021-2 years ago.
01:05:04You made a big mistake.
01:05:06At the age of 12-13,
01:05:08I will advise my parents
01:05:10that
01:05:12it's too early
01:05:14to give her a mobile phone.
01:05:16She is connected
01:05:18to the whole world.
01:05:20It's obvious.
01:05:22My advice is
01:05:24to give her a mobile phone
01:05:26at the age of 16.
01:05:28At the age of 13,
01:05:30she is still growing.
01:05:32She is exploring new things.
01:05:34She has a charm.
01:05:36She has a glamorous life.
01:05:38She will attract those things.
01:05:40What happens to girls at this age?
01:05:42If a boy
01:05:44gives too much attention
01:05:46to a girl,
01:05:48she will be attracted to him.
01:05:50These are hormones.
01:05:52If she gets
01:05:54too much attention,
01:05:56she will be attracted to him.
01:05:58It happens.
01:06:00You have to
01:06:02be her friend.
01:06:04You have to ask her
01:06:06what is it.
01:06:08What does he say to you?
01:06:10There is a limitation
01:06:12of shame.
01:06:14Many mothers
01:06:16have a generation gap.
01:06:18There is a big age gap.
01:06:20They can't reach there.
01:06:22Sometimes,
01:06:24older sisters help.
01:06:26If older sisters are
01:06:28trusted by younger sisters,
01:06:30the sisters
01:06:32share that with the girls.
01:06:34We are in COED.
01:06:36We have a friendship with boys.
01:06:38At that time,
01:06:40we didn't have awareness
01:06:42that we play with boys.
01:06:44We used to play like boys.
01:06:46We used to make them girls.
01:06:48Phone is a thing
01:06:50which has TikTok,
01:06:52Insta, everything.
01:06:54People know that
01:06:56if they make friends with a boy,
01:06:58they will have a different feeling.
01:07:00We will make a different world.
01:07:02We will go to Lala Land.
01:07:04This is all because of the phone.
01:07:06I have given my daughter a phone.
01:07:08I will tell you to
01:07:10take a call from her.
01:07:12Handle it with love.
01:07:14Make her focus on her studies.
01:07:16Stay with her.
01:07:18Such kids need more attention.
01:07:20We don't know
01:07:22about your family.
01:07:24I am sorry.
01:07:26My thinking is different.
01:07:28I gave my kids
01:07:30a phone
01:07:32at 11.
01:07:34All her friends had a phone.
01:07:36Communication
01:07:38was easy for me.
01:07:40I felt it was a necessity.
01:07:42I had to give it.
01:07:44I gave it.
01:07:46As far as her situation is concerned,
01:07:48if she
01:07:50makes friends with a boy,
01:07:52what will happen?
01:07:54Can't you tell him
01:07:56that if you like him
01:07:58and he likes you
01:08:00and you want to be a life partner,
01:08:02why don't you meet in the family?
01:08:04The boy's family
01:08:06and the girl's family
01:08:08should meet.
01:08:10If they like it,
01:08:12then
01:08:14you can get engaged.
01:08:16You are 18.
01:08:18If you get engaged at 15,
01:08:20it's not a bad thing.
01:08:22Is your daughter 13 or 15?
01:08:2413.
01:08:26She said 15.
01:08:2815.
01:08:30After that,
01:08:32if you didn't like the family,
01:08:34there must be a reason
01:08:36why you didn't like the family.
01:08:38You can explain to your daughter
01:08:40that this is the problem.
01:08:42We can't
01:08:44get you engaged to this boy.
01:08:46Look at someone else.
01:08:48My thinking is
01:08:50As you said,
01:08:52in the last segment,
01:08:54the child needs logic.
01:08:56She doesn't need this.
01:08:58It's forbidden.
01:09:00It doesn't happen in our house.
01:09:02She is very young.
01:09:0415.
01:09:06Saima,
01:09:08as you don't have a daughter,
01:09:10I will tell you.
01:09:12If you want to snatch the phone,
01:09:14that's the biggest mistake.
01:09:16Not snatching,
01:09:18but giving it is wrong.
01:09:20But you have given it.
01:09:22Keep a monitor.
01:09:24If you have given the phone,
01:09:26because of their security,
01:09:28they need the phone.
01:09:30Where are you?
01:09:32When are you reaching?
01:09:34Are you stuck in traffic?
01:09:36Monitoring is important.
01:09:38Dialogue with the child
01:09:40is very important.
01:09:42In the olden days,
01:09:44early marriages happened.
01:09:46The reason was that
01:09:48the children shouldn't go
01:09:50on the wrong track.
01:09:52If they like each other,
01:09:54the child will open her eyes
01:09:56that the other person
01:09:58is not fooling her.
01:10:00He is not showing her
01:10:02sweet dreams.
01:10:04If he is not taking her
01:10:06to his house,
01:10:08it means something is wrong.
01:10:10Then she will talk to that boy
01:10:12that why your family is not coming.
01:10:14But Sunita,
01:10:16it's a good thing
01:10:18to get married,
01:10:20but she is in this age
01:10:22These relationships
01:10:24start forming in your mind
01:10:26that she might be
01:10:28more serious.
01:10:30If something negative happens,
01:10:32the girls get traumatized
01:10:34at a very young age.
01:10:36To remove their mind,
01:10:38you have to study,
01:10:40you have to become a big person.
01:10:42After that, when your time comes.
01:10:44Earlier, we didn't have phones.
01:10:46In our time,
01:10:48we didn't have phones.
01:10:50Our parents told us
01:10:52that we don't have anything else to do.
01:10:54We understood.
01:10:56Our children have phones.
01:10:58If we tell them not to do something,
01:11:00they will tell us
01:11:02that we are not doing anything,
01:11:04but they are doing something.
01:11:06You cannot monitor
01:11:08the child for 24 hours.
01:11:10I don't think it's a good idea.
01:11:12It's your advice.
01:11:14She is a mother.
01:11:16If I was in her place,
01:11:18I would have taught her.
01:11:20Marriage, children, relations,
01:11:22it's very early.
01:11:24I am so friendly with children.
01:11:26I ask them every day
01:11:28if they have a girlfriend or boyfriend.
01:11:30Is there anyone who you fancy?
01:11:32Do you like someone?
01:11:34Do you not like someone?
01:11:36Do you like someone?
01:11:38Do you like someone?
01:11:40They tell me themselves.
01:11:42If you are doing this,
01:11:44the children are young,
01:11:46and they don't hesitate
01:11:48to talk to you.
01:11:50If something happens in the future,
01:11:52instead of telling someone else,
01:11:54they will tell me.
01:11:56Sometimes,
01:11:58we have to stop hesitating
01:12:00with our children.
01:12:02My daughter is still young,
01:12:04but if she comes to me
01:12:06at the age of 15
01:12:08and tells me that
01:12:10we like each other,
01:12:12I will definitely go
01:12:14and talk to her.
01:12:16If I feel that
01:12:18we can move forward,
01:12:20I will definitely move forward.
01:12:22I will not stop her.
01:12:24I will tell her to get engaged
01:12:26when she completes her master's.
01:12:28After that,
01:12:30you can get married.
01:12:32When you are engaged,
01:12:34you have so much time
01:12:36to understand each other.
01:12:38Their minds change.
01:12:40When they are in the growing age,
01:12:42their problems also start.
01:12:44Can you ask her
01:12:46if she can change her husband?
01:12:48Everyone has their own
01:12:50family background.
01:12:52If this is the case,
01:12:54then what does her husband think?
01:12:56But you know,
01:12:58a woman has the power
01:13:00to change her husband's mind
01:13:02with love and affection.
01:13:04As we said,
01:13:06the world has changed.
01:13:08Instead of making children rebellious,
01:13:10if we know
01:13:12what they are doing,
01:13:14then we can save them from many things.
01:13:16One more thing,
01:13:18if a boy comes and says that
01:13:20I have a girlfriend,
01:13:22everyone will say that
01:13:24he has a girlfriend.
01:13:26I have three sons.
01:13:28At a certain age,
01:13:30my children knew
01:13:32that if a girl says hi,
01:13:34then I will appreciate her.
01:13:36You have a certain age.
01:13:38I know that
01:13:40you will have girlfriends
01:13:42and friends.
01:13:44I have given them that margin.
01:13:46But my priority is
01:13:48your studies.
01:13:50If you don't take a stand,
01:13:52how will you bring a girl?
01:13:54This is what you say.
01:13:56I often tell them
01:13:58that a girl will not
01:14:00even befriend you
01:14:02until you become something.
01:14:04I have many friends.
01:14:06We sleep together.
01:14:08But they have come to a different age.
01:14:10We have to brainwash
01:14:12our mothers like this.
01:14:14We have to make them sleep at night.
01:14:16We have to tell them
01:14:18that they have to become something.
01:14:20So that
01:14:22it becomes their aim in life.
01:14:24We have to become something.
01:14:26Because
01:14:28even if we follow the trend,
01:14:30we become girlfriends and boyfriends.
01:14:32If it's my friend's, then it's not mine.
01:14:34If it's someone else's,
01:14:36then it should be like this.
01:14:38We also explore.
01:14:40Until you become friends with someone,
01:14:42you won't know the difference between
01:14:44this and that.
01:14:46When you become friends with someone else,
01:14:48you will know
01:14:50that there are men like this.
01:14:52I thought he was right.
01:14:54Exploring is also important.
01:14:56Do you suppress a girl from home?
01:14:58No, I don't talk to boys.
01:15:00A girl has to study with boys.
01:15:02If she has to do a job,
01:15:04she has to go out.
01:15:06We have a time shortage.
01:15:08We have to go on a break.
01:15:10The topic is not yet over.
01:15:12There is a lot more.
01:15:14It should be continued.
01:15:16We will do it some other day.
01:15:18Thank you so much
01:15:20for bringing your views here.
01:15:22Many parents
01:15:24may agree with you.
01:15:26Some will agree with you.
01:15:28Some will agree with you.
01:15:30Some will agree with me.
01:15:32This was today's program.
01:15:34We will be back after a short break.
01:15:36Thank you so much.
01:15:38Good morning.
01:15:48Welcome.
01:15:50Welcome back to Good Morning Pakistan.
01:15:52We are going to talk about a husband
01:15:54who has malnutrition.
01:15:56We have Dr. Sadiapal with us.
01:16:00We will talk to him
01:16:02about malnutrition
01:16:04of children
01:16:06who are less than 5 years old.
01:16:12If they are not fed properly,
01:16:14how much damage
01:16:16can be done to their
01:16:18initial stages of malnutrition.
01:16:20Due to misunderstandings
01:16:22of mothers,
01:16:24many things get ruined
01:16:26from the very beginning.
01:16:28We will talk to Dr. Sadiapal about this.
01:16:30Greetings.
01:16:32How are you?
01:16:34I am fine.
01:16:36We are stressing on this
01:16:38every day.
01:16:40The aim of Kashf Foundation
01:16:42is to educate women
01:16:44and families
01:16:46who do not have
01:16:48this knowledge
01:16:50or who have
01:16:52these myths.
01:16:54It is not important
01:16:56to take care of yourself
01:16:58and your child.
01:17:00They are so busy
01:17:02in their work
01:17:04that they forget
01:17:06how important it is
01:17:08to keep their gut strong.
01:17:14My first question is
01:17:16about natural feeding.
01:17:18What are the misunderstandings
01:17:20in certain families?
01:17:24It is quite common in Pakistan
01:17:26that people
01:17:28in upper
01:17:30and lower class
01:17:32think that
01:17:34mother's milk is not enough.
01:17:36They should not give anything
01:17:38other than mother's milk.
01:17:40No water, sugar,
01:17:42honey or anything else.
01:17:44Mother's milk is enough.
01:17:46When a baby
01:17:48is 6 months old,
01:17:50we call it weaning.
01:17:52Semi-solid foods
01:17:54are added.
01:17:56When a baby
01:17:58is able to sit
01:18:00and hold its neck,
01:18:02its reflexes
01:18:04develop to eat
01:18:06semi-solid foods.
01:18:08At that time,
01:18:10you have to add things.
01:18:12They are simple things.
01:18:14You can mash a banana
01:18:16or a small piece
01:18:18that they can eat.
01:18:20They do not have teeth at that time.
01:18:22Other things are
01:18:26semi-solid
01:18:28like khichdi.
01:18:30Khichdi is a very good thing.
01:18:32It is a mixture
01:18:34of rice and lentils.
01:18:36You can add a piece of bone
01:18:38or meat
01:18:40to get proteins.
01:18:42You can add some vegetables
01:18:44to mash
01:18:46and puree it.
01:18:48You can puree a fruit
01:18:50and mash it
01:18:52and give it to a baby.
01:18:54The natural
01:18:56foods we eat
01:18:58are not bad.
01:19:00It is a very nutritious food
01:19:02if you have made it at home.
01:19:04You get expensive things
01:19:06that are advertised.
01:19:08It is not necessary.
01:19:10It is made at home.
01:19:12It is cheap and good.
01:19:16The first milk
01:19:18after delivery
01:19:20is very important
01:19:22for the baby's
01:19:24immune system.
01:19:26We talked about it yesterday
01:19:28and I am repeating it today.
01:19:30Many elders
01:19:32waste this milk.
01:19:34This milk is
01:19:36wrong.
01:19:38It is very important.
01:19:40It is called colostrum in English.
01:19:42As soon as the baby
01:19:44is born,
01:19:46we say
01:19:48that ideally within half an hour
01:19:50the baby should
01:19:52start drinking milk.
01:19:54If it is not possible,
01:19:56then within an hour.
01:19:58The first drops of milk
01:20:00have a lot of protein
01:20:02and have antibodies
01:20:04that the baby gets
01:20:06from the mother's blood.
01:20:08It protects the baby
01:20:10from infections.
01:20:14When a newborn baby
01:20:16is born,
01:20:18it does not have
01:20:20the ability to fight
01:20:22infections.
01:20:24It does not have its own antibodies.
01:20:26It takes time.
01:20:28That is why vaccination
01:20:30is very important.
01:20:32During pregnancy,
01:20:34it is recommended to
01:20:36get tetanus
01:20:38and flu vaccination.
01:20:42After birth,
01:20:44vaccination of the baby
01:20:46is very important.
01:20:48Breast milk
01:20:50has the most
01:20:52antibodies.
01:20:54It is very important.
01:20:56I would like to say
01:20:58from my experience that
01:21:00if the baby has a stomachache
01:21:02the mother's milk
01:21:04should not be
01:21:06given to the baby.
01:21:12There are many myths.
01:21:14This is a wrong myth.
01:21:16There is no point
01:21:18in giving breast milk
01:21:20to the baby
01:21:22if there is no
01:21:24infection in the ear.
01:21:26Breast milk is
01:21:28ideal for the baby.
01:21:30The baby should not
01:21:32be given water,
01:21:34honey,
01:21:36cow's or buffalo's milk.
01:21:40When my baby
01:21:42was born,
01:21:44I was not able to understand
01:21:46what the mother was feeding
01:21:48the baby.
01:21:50The baby's stomach
01:21:52is like a bowl.
01:21:54There is a space in the bowl
01:21:56for milk.
01:21:58The baby has calories
01:22:00and water.
01:22:02The baby will get
01:22:04what he wants.
01:22:06But if you fill the bowl
01:22:08with water,
01:22:10the baby will take
01:22:12water instead of milk.
01:22:14This is wrong.
01:22:18The mother's milk
01:22:20is ideal for the baby.
01:22:22The baby's stomach
01:22:24is like a bowl.
01:22:26If you fill the bowl
01:22:28with water,
01:22:30the baby will not
01:22:32take water.
01:22:34The baby does not
01:22:36need water.
01:22:38The baby's stomach
01:22:40is like a bowl.
01:22:42The baby does not
01:22:44need water.
01:22:46The baby's stomach
01:22:48is like a bowl.
01:22:50The baby's stomach
01:22:52is ideal for the baby.
01:22:54The baby does not need
01:22:56food or water.
01:22:58If you are giving the baby
01:23:00water or milk,
01:23:02you are increasing
01:23:04the risk of diarrhea.
01:23:10We all drink water
01:23:12after boiling it.
01:23:14The water in the bottle
01:23:16is called mineral water.
01:23:18If you are giving
01:23:20water to the baby
01:23:22for more than 6 months,
01:23:24you should boil it
01:23:26for 20 minutes
01:23:28to ensure
01:23:30that there are no harmful
01:23:32organisms in it.
01:23:34The responsibility of
01:23:36the mother is
01:23:38on the baby.
01:23:40What is the role
01:23:42of the father
01:23:44and the family
01:23:46in taking care
01:23:48of the baby?
01:23:54Being a mother is
01:23:56a full-time job.
01:23:58You are devoted
01:24:00to that baby.
01:24:02If the mother does not
01:24:04take care of the baby,
01:24:06the baby cannot survive.
01:24:08The mother needs
01:24:10some rest and
01:24:12nutritious food.
01:24:14The mother
01:24:16can take care of the baby.
01:24:18The husband can also
01:24:20massage the baby's legs.
01:24:22The husband should
01:24:24take care of the baby.
01:24:26The husband should
01:24:28take care of the baby.
01:24:30The husband should
01:24:32take care of the baby.
01:24:36We should change our
01:24:38attitude.
01:24:40We should not
01:24:42think about
01:24:44the baby's injury.
01:24:46We should
01:24:48encourage the baby
01:24:50to behave
01:24:52well.
01:24:54I think
01:24:56when a woman
01:24:58is in labor
01:25:00and is suffering,
01:25:02she should
01:25:04be treated like a princess.
01:25:06Even after delivery,
01:25:08you should take care
01:25:10And we should take care of them so that they sleep well and take care of their children.
01:25:17How important is open conversation between a family?
01:25:23This is very important.
01:25:25In our society, I will start with children.
01:25:30If a child asks a question, he gets scolded.
01:25:33He is told to sit quietly and all that.
01:25:35He is not given an answer.
01:25:37We should honestly answer our children.
01:25:40And if we are asked an awkward question,
01:25:43we should try to answer it honestly.
01:25:48We should not lie.
01:25:49Because this is what our children learn.
01:25:52Exactly.
01:25:53These can be awkward things.
01:25:56For instance, children often ask,
01:25:59Mama, where did this baby come from?
01:26:03Mama always lies.
01:26:05He came from the sky.
01:26:07He fell from the sky.
01:26:08He came and left you.
01:26:10Yes.
01:26:11We do not say it openly.
01:26:14We say it in a way,
01:26:16Look, it was in my tummy.
01:26:18It was in my stomach.
01:26:19And you saw it.
01:26:21And the doctor cut it and took it out.
01:26:24This is one way to deal with it.
01:26:27But when he grows up,
01:26:29we should tell him properly.
01:26:31When parents do not talk to the child,
01:26:34what will the rest of the family talk about?
01:26:37We need to.
01:26:38We need to talk honestly.
01:26:41I am not saying that you should talk like this in a big gathering.
01:26:45You should talk to the child alone.
01:26:47You can talk to the child alone and to the adults.
01:26:50You should do it.
01:26:52Thank you, doctor.
01:26:53You solve a lot of complicated issues.
01:26:57Thank you very much for coming.
01:27:00This was our program for today.
01:27:02I hope you learned and understood.
01:27:04And you will apply it practically all your life.
01:27:07Good morning, Pakistan.
01:27:09Khuda Hafiz.

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