• last month
In this episode, I analyze the emotional intensity of social and political discourse through the lens of a recent hurricane in Florida, highlighting political inaction during crises and its role in deepening polarization.

Shifting focus, I explore the allure of the beauty industry versus traditional sectors, questioning societal values placed on aesthetics. I also delve into gender dynamics, tackling the mixed signals sent by women that complicate male approaches.

I discuss the struggles of young women post-divorce regarding financial stability and societal expectations, while advocating for the importance of unstructured play in childhood development.

Lastly, I examine the erosion of social contracts since COVID-19, underscoring the need for empathy and understanding in our increasingly fractured society. This episode encourages reflection on personal choices and the nature of human connections.

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Transcript
00:00Yo, yo, everybody, hope you're doing well, it's Dan Mullany from Freedom Aid.
00:06So here's some interesting things I found on social media that I thought would be fun
00:11for you or instructive for you to look at.
00:14So this is a wild thing.
00:17Maybe it's a little bit more women than men, but people get so insanely invested in politics
00:21and narrative that they're almost completely beyond reason.
00:25So forget about the political content, just look at the intensity of what this woman in
00:30Florida is talking about with regards to the upcoming, I guess, imminent hurricane.
00:37This is not political unless you make it political.
00:39This weather is not political.
00:40It's weather.
00:41It's not political unless you make it political.
00:44Rhonda Santis is refusing to take calls from the White House.
00:49And Kamala Harris.
00:52Now you see that intensity.
00:56I don't know how people get so intense about politics.
01:00I mean, obviously you can say, well, what kind of system is it where if you don't take
01:03a phone call, you don't get disaster relief?
01:05That's just kind of crazy, right?
01:07But that intensity, look at this.
01:10And how much of disappointment does she have with regards to men in her life or this intensity?
01:16I don't know if you've met people like this, we'll look at an abortion one later, but look
01:21at this intensity.
01:22Is it politically motivated?
01:24We are in the middle of a fucking disaster.
01:27And then, you know, it's going to come to this and he won't take calls from the White
01:34House.
01:35Stop, Floridians.
01:36When you think you aren't getting the disaster relief that you need in a few days.
01:45I just want you to remember who did it.
01:47Yeah, I don't know.
01:49Again, maybe somebody can help me understand this, but I don't know how people get this
01:54invested that whether it's not political, I mean, DeSantis has done pretty well with
02:00regards to disaster relief and it's not like Kamala Harris did much for the Appalachians
02:04recently.
02:05But yeah, this level of intensity, you can't reach it with reason.
02:08You can't reach it with reason, with evidence, with facts, with data.
02:11And this is, of course, very, very common these days.
02:15I think I saved this for my daughter.
02:17All right.
02:18And I'm going to do the virtues on a different show.
02:22So this is interesting.
02:24And this goes to the question of which industries are female dominated that aren't to do with
02:30sex or beauty, right?
02:33So you know, a very, very pretty woman and so on.
02:36And I mean, I guess nice.
02:38One, and my sister came to creating a business.
02:42I did not want to do it.
02:44So a nice cleavage and just a pretty girl and a pretty woman and all of that.
02:49And of course, she's worked hard on all of that.
02:52But this is the economy just makes no sense to me.
02:54This aspect of the economy makes less than no sense to me.
02:57So in 2008, Huda Kattan was an unemployed beauty blogger, should have been making a
03:03board game.
03:04In 2017, she built a billion dollar beauty brand by selling fake eyelashes.
03:10Like holy crap.
03:13Fake eyelashes.
03:14That's how you make a billion dollar beauty brand.
03:19Oh my God.
03:21Oh my gosh.
03:24And here the men are out just foolishly creating sewage systems, delivering electricity, keeping
03:31generators running, repairing roofs and so on.
03:35When we should make a fortune by selling fake eyelashes.
03:40I can't even with the modern world.
03:45It is just too bizarre for words for me.
03:49All right.
03:52Somebody says, there's a guy I follow that teaches other guys social skills, basic empathy
03:59stuff, etc.
04:00And he made this point last night.
04:02Something like guys heard some women say, approaching me in public is harassment and
04:06took it 100% literally.
04:08But that wasn't the intent.
04:10The very, very interesting thing is to say, don't approach, don't approach me in public.
04:17Right?
04:18That's what the women are saying.
04:19I find it creepy and weird that men approach me in public.
04:23And of course it's true that men say, well, okay, that's, and this is a big thing.
04:28Now men don't approach women in public because they've heard this a zillion times.
04:31Don't approach me in public.
04:32It's weird and creepy.
04:34And so men are like, okay, well, we won't approach women in public.
04:36And then women get upset.
04:39Man, it is a tough thing though.
04:44This is not like autism or anything like this is a really tough thing for men to, to get
04:50to understand, to process that.
04:54What does it mean?
04:57What does it mean if a woman says, approach me in public is harassment.
05:03And then a woman says, well, I'm, I'm upset that men don't approach me in public.
05:09So for the male brain, this makes no sense at all for most male brains, right?
05:14This doesn't make any sense at all because it's a no win situation.
05:19It's a no win situation.
05:20So if women as a whole say, it's creepy when men approach me in public, and then men say,
05:26well, I don't want to be creepy, so I won't approach women in public.
05:28And then women say, well, I'm upset that men don't approach me in public.
05:32Well, you can't win because if you approach a woman in public, she can complain that you're
05:38creepy and of course, approaching women in public now, since they could be secretly recording,
05:42they could, uh, uh, they could be recording on their phone audio for some reason.
05:47They could suddenly flip on the camera and then, you know, you're a creep.
05:52And so it's like the gym problem, right?
05:54Although the gym problem, usually you can see some kind of camera, but people's sort
05:58of public recording thing.
05:59The public shaming thing is way, way, way more than it used to be, of course, right?
06:04So what are we supposed to do as men?
06:07Approaching women in public is creepy.
06:09Okay.
06:10I want to approach women in public.
06:11Aw, how come no men are approaching me?
06:15So you can't win because if you approach the woman in public, you might be humiliated.
06:19Oh, you know, which is not the end of the world, but she also might record you, might
06:22be uploaded, right?
06:23Like, I mean, you just might be in the background of her, her audio recording or video recording.
06:29And of course, if you say, well, women don't really mean that, then you're saying that
06:35no means yes.
06:37Don't do this.
06:38Well, I'm going to discount that because women are fine if you do it.
06:44How are you supposed to win?
06:46You can't win.
06:47You can't win except by ignoring women's general stated preferences.
06:53Now, of course, when some women say, I don't want to be approached in public, you then
06:59have to break it down as a non-general principle.
07:02You have to unblob the women, right?
07:04So some women don't like being approached in public.
07:07Other women, if you approach them in a friendly and positive manner or whatever, then they
07:12don't mind being, or they may even in fact enjoy being approached in public.
07:19And so what I would do if I was still single is I would not accept that some women don't
07:29like being approached in public and universalize that at all.
07:33I mean, I met a number of my girlfriends by just chatting with women in public and so
07:39on.
07:40And some women weren't particularly open to being chatted with in public, which is fine.
07:44You just wish them a good day and move on with your life.
07:49But men are looking for rules.
07:52Don't approach women in public.
07:53Well, that's just some women under some circumstances, depending on how you look or what your charisma
07:57is or whatever it is, right?
07:58So yeah.
08:02So just because some women don't like to be approached in public and that's been sort
08:07of pumped and almost everything that is floated to the top of media is manipulative, propagandistic,
08:15destructive, civilizational ending lies.
08:17I'm not kidding about this.
08:19Almost everything that flows to the top or women are saying this, or men are saying this,
08:23or this is this belief.
08:24It's almost all calculated consciously or unconsciously to wreck and destroy everybody's
08:31lives as a whole.
08:33So some women of course say, don't approach me in public.
08:39And the corrupt genes in a sense are always fighting with the virtuous genes, right?
08:46Which is not to say that corruption and virtue are genetic, but the tendency or predilection
08:52amid every character trait has some genetic basis, right?
08:55So the bad people are constantly fighting with the good people.
09:07And so the empathy personalities are constantly fighting with the cold hearted sociopathic
09:17personalities.
09:18So when a message is floated up, which says, women are saying, don't approach me in public.
09:26What that's doing, what that is, is the cruel personality structures warring against the
09:34empathetic personality structures.
09:37Because if you say women don't like this, then sensitive and empathetic men will respect
09:44that and therefore not approach women in public, which opens the field up to the cold hearted
09:50and the cruel to approach women in public because they don't care what the women want.
09:54They only care what they themselves, right?
09:56The cold cruel men, they only care what they themselves.
09:58So it clears the field.
09:59Is it nothing to do with what women want and don't want as a whole because there is no
10:03such thing as what women want and don't want as a whole.
10:08There is only reproductive strategies in this post-Christian godless hellscape of endless
10:16mammalian bullshit manipulation.
10:18It's all we are, all we are, it's all the media is doing is floating various exploitive
10:26strategies.
10:27It's all they do.
10:31So when you get as a media talking point that women don't want men to approach them at work
10:39or in a park or in a coffee shop or talk to women, well that is a war from the heartless
10:49personalities to the empathetic personalities.
10:53Well women don't want this, well I don't want to impose upon women, I want to be sensitive
10:57to their needs.
10:58I want to think about what they want.
10:59Not embarrass them or humiliate them.
11:01Okay, good.
11:02So I won't talk.
11:03Okay.
11:04But the cold hearted men, they don't care about that.
11:06So it's all just floating up, all just floated up as a part of a war as a whole and believe
11:13none of it.
11:14All right.
11:15Canadians are struggling.
11:16I live and I'm about a month away from being, I live in Canada and I'm about a month away
11:22from being homeless.
11:23I'm living in my car.
11:24I'm a single parent.
11:25I'm responsible for putting a roof over not only my head but my daughter's head and no
11:30matter how hard I've tried, I have gotten up every single day and immediately started
11:34looking for apartments.
11:36So that's interesting.
11:37I mean she's got nice makeup on, nice hair product on, nicely painted room.
11:43I assume this is not her daughter's room because it looks like a picture of Marilyn Monroe
11:47doing her best logo of the Rolling Stones impression and she's got this nice lighting
11:52along her ceiling.
11:53So I mean, I've lived very close to the bone when it comes to income, right?
12:02As you know, I've been paying my own bills since I was 15 years old and I had a room
12:08in a house for $275 a month and I biked everywhere because I couldn't even afford much bus fare
12:16and I lived on giant vats of pasta and sauce and ramen noodles.
12:22So I've lived pretty close to the bone but then I grew up really poor so it wasn't a
12:27big problem.
12:28I don't know if people, I'm not saying it's not tough out there, of course it is.
12:31I'm not saying that but what I don't, I guess what I have a certain amount of impatience
12:36with is, so you're a young woman, you had a kid and you got divorced.
12:43You're a young woman, you had a kid and you got divorced.
12:48Well, if the guy wasn't violent, right?
12:53If he didn't beat you and or your daughter up, I think she's got a daughter, if he didn't
12:59beat you up and he wasn't like tearing you apart emotionally with vicious torrents of
13:06verbal abuse, right?
13:07Of course, if he was violent and abusive, then you shouldn't have dated, got engaged,
13:13got married, had a kid.
13:15I'm not sure if, of course, it occurred in that order, it's all a exploding kittens card
13:20shuffle these days but if he was violent and abusive, then of course you should not have
13:29dated, engaged, married and childed with him and then you got divorced which is very expensive.
13:36It's very expensive in terms of time, stress, money, energy and so on, right?
13:43So, if he was abusive, then you unfortunately had a child with a violent and abusive man
13:51which is your choice, right?
13:54If he wasn't abusive and you got divorced as, I mean, the number one, I mean, women
13:59initiate most divorces and the number one cause of the divorce is dissatisfaction, just
14:08dissatisfied, okay?
14:11So, if you're dissatisfied, then all you've done is shifted your dissatisfaction.
14:18So if the man wasn't, I don't know, fulfilling all of your emotional needs or whatever it
14:23is, didn't make you feel special and treasured and wanted, like whatever it is, the sort
14:27of Disney bullshit princess fantasy that a lot of women have going on in their heads,
14:35then all that's happened is you said, well, okay, I'm dissatisfied with my marriage so
14:39I'm going to divorce this guy and now I'm dissatisfied with my income because you had
14:44a family income.
14:46Two can live as cheaply as one.
14:47You had a family income, right?
14:49Let's say your family income was $100,000 a year.
14:53I'm just using this for even numbers.
14:55I'm sure it's not that high for such young people but let's say your family income was
14:59$100,000 and your expenses were $75,000, okay?
15:11But now you split up.
15:15So now you have two incomes of $50,000 and you have expenses that are probably $110,000
15:25because you need, you know, two places to live, right?
15:30You need two internet accesses.
15:32You need, maybe you need another car and lots of extra, you need double the hydro, like
15:39all this kind of stuff, right?
15:40So your expenses have gone way up.
15:43You spent a bunch of money on the divorce and so you're broke.
15:48So if people say, well, I was dissatisfied with my marriage so I got divorced and now
15:54I'm broke and I'm dissatisfied with my income, I view them as unbelievably selfish.
16:01Unbelievably selfish.
16:04Because it's like, well, I was not super happy with my husband so I divorced him and now
16:13I'm super unhappy with my income.
16:17I don't have enough money.
16:21So you have shifted the dissatisfaction from just you to you and your husband and your
16:28daughter and your landlord and all of the people that you need to pay bills.
16:33You've just shifted it.
16:34That's all.
16:35It's all that's happened is you've shifted dissatisfaction and extended and expanded
16:39it.
16:40And your daughter now has to live with financial stress and the stress of divorce and the stress
16:43of separated parents, whereas before, you only had to live with some dissatisfaction
16:48because the guy wasn't fulfilling all of your emotional needs.
16:51Anyway.
16:53Consistently every day and I have found nothing that will accept us.
16:56My credit stinks, not because I've been late on rent, no, I've paid my rent on time consistently
17:01for years.
17:02But that doesn't matter because I have to prioritize paying rent over paying my other
17:05debts that I incurred going through a divorce in 2020.
17:07See, there it is.
17:09So you went through a divorce in 2020, I guess around COVID time.
17:13So you went through a divorce and that blew your finances out of the water.
17:20And again, if the man was violent, verbally, physically, emotionally abusive, well, that's
17:26terrible and therefore you shouldn't have had a kid with him, right?
17:34So she can't afford paying all her bills because of choices that she made.
17:41So because I prioritized paying rent, my credit score took a hit, went down significantly.
17:45Now I have bad credit and there is an entire list of places that I do not qualify for because
17:51of that.
17:52Right.
17:53So you didn't pay your bills and now people don't want to rent to you, which makes absolute
17:57complete and total perfect sense.
17:59And that's because of rent control and how hard it is.
18:03So in Canada, it's virtually impossible to kick people out in the winter.
18:07So people don't want to rent to you because there are all these rules that say, well,
18:13if you don't pay your bills, if you don't pay your rent, you can't be kicked out.
18:17Okay.
18:18I get that.
18:19So my good friend, you are going to have to take a room in a house with your daughter.
18:24You say, oh my gosh, that's really, man, that's going back.
18:27It's like, yes, it's going back.
18:29Yes, it's going back because that's what happens when you choose to get divorced.
18:36And a lot of people, again, because, sorry, I forgot to finish this point earlier.
18:41Because I grew up poor, for me, every increase in income is a net positive, yay, right?
18:51And there have been times where I've had higher income, times where I've had lower income.
18:55It varies a smidge when you're controversial.
18:57But the basic fact is that a lot of people who come from middle to upper middle class
19:04households, when their real sense of money comes in, when their parents are in their
19:09forties and their fifties, in peak earning times for men in particular, 45 to 55, right?
19:15Missed by that much, peak earning, right?
19:18So a lot of these kids, I don't know about this woman, it doesn't quite look like it,
19:22but whatever, right?
19:23So a lot of these young people come out of households where their parents are wealthy
19:29and then they feel like they are broke because they're just starting out.
19:34So they weren't around when their parents were broke, they're only around really thinking
19:37about money and consuming when their parents are pretty wealthy because their parents are
19:41in their forties and fifties, which is peak earning.
19:45And so they feel like they're compromising by moving out of a house into a room.
19:50I mean, I spent a whole year living in one room with another guy, two of us in the same
19:56room.
19:59And I didn't find that, I mean, I didn't particularly like it, although I'm actually still friends
20:03with the guy for like 35 years later, but it wasn't my, I didn't even know who I was
20:10moving in with.
20:11I just needed a place and this was the only place I could remotely afford.
20:16So yes, when you move out from a four bedroom house with a pool and a Lexus into a room,
20:25you're not broke.
20:27Starting out like your parents started out.
20:30So anyway.
20:32Not to mention apartments are going for like $1,800 to over $2,000 per month.
20:37I don't know what I'm going to do.
20:39Yes.
20:40And I would imagine that as most young Canadian women, she voted for the left and that's why
20:46the rent is so high.
20:49I'm terrified.
20:50I've never felt so defeated and stressed in my life.
20:55I don't know what I'm going to do.
20:58The state of our housing here in Canada is unsustainable and fucking unacceptable.
21:03Yes.
21:04Well, you're going to have to change your mind.
21:09If you want to change circumstances in society, you have to change your mind about everything
21:15rather than just complain.
21:16All right.
21:17So let's see here.
21:20A primary cause of the rise of mental disorders is a decline over decades in opportunities
21:24for children and teens to play, roam and engage in other activities independent of direct
21:28oversight and control by adults.
21:32So it is one of the great glories of my childhood was the fabulous anarchy of roaming around
21:39broke in particular and not having any adults to supervise.
21:45We had to invent all of our own games.
21:47We had to invent all our own rules.
21:49We had to invent all our own enforcement.
21:52But of course, the powers that be don't want kids roaming around solving their own problems
21:57because if you have as the vast bulk of your childhood solving problems without a centralized
22:05authority, you might grow up to question the value of a centralized authority, right?
22:09Well, we didn't need an umpire and a centralized authority to play all the games we played
22:15as a kid.
22:17So why do we need centralized authority?
22:20All right.
22:21All right.
22:22This is for my show later.
22:25Hot people are perceived as funnier on camera than in audio, but unattractive people are
22:29less funny when seen.
22:31Supports a theoretical view of laughter as an evolved interest indicator.
22:37When people say they're attracted to humor, they may have causality backwards, right?
22:42So if someone is attractive, they're perceived as funnier, but people who aren't seen are
22:51perceived as funnier when it's just audio.
22:53That's interesting, right?
22:54This, I'm just going to let this play.
22:55This is beautiful.
22:56If you could have dinner with anyone, living or dead, who would you choose?
23:06Kylie Minogue.
23:07Oh.
23:08Marilyn Monroe.
23:09Oh, God.
23:10I wouldn't have a clue.
23:11Oh, no.
23:12Paul Aga.
23:13Kim Kardashian.
23:14No, no, no.
23:15I'd like to have dinner with Justin Bieber.
23:16What?
23:17He's not coming to my house.
23:18No.
23:19I'd have Bob Hawke.
23:20Dave Hughes.
23:21Barry Humphreys.
23:22Jimi Hendrix.
23:23People who have made a difference in the world, maybe Nelson Mandela at the dinner table.
23:26Oh, I don't know what he's going to say.
23:27I'm scared.
23:28Kids.
23:29If you could have dinner with anyone in the world, who would you choose?
23:30Probably our whole family, like a whole extended family.
23:31Mum and Dad.
23:32Mum and Dad.
23:33Mum and Dad.
23:34Mum and Dad.
23:35Mum and Dad.
23:36Mum and Dad.
23:37Mum and Dad.
23:38Mum and Dad.
23:39Mum and Dad.
23:40Mum and Dad.
23:41Is it up to be a celebrity?
23:44Could it be family?
23:45We love it.
23:46We talk about how school is.
23:48We ask Mum and Dad how a bad day was.
23:50Family.
23:51Yeah, Mum and Dad.
23:52Family.
23:53Who would you always like to have dinner with?
23:57They just want to be with us while they're eating food, which is pretty cool.
24:02They see us above everything.
24:03I'm going to get a bit of a message in it for me.
24:09So yes, yes, yes.
24:11And in particular, from the ages of about three or four to maybe 12 or 13, roughly in
24:19the sort of what's called the latency period, that's when you can have in some ways the
24:25most goofy fun.
24:26Well, in many ways, the most goofy fun with your kids.
24:28Before that, it's a lot of sort of maintenance and sleeplessness, but sort of two or three
24:32to maybe 12 or 13 is the time for the goofiest play fun, right?
24:38Where you just make up games and stories and so on.
24:41My daughter and I, originally it was kiddie games, then it became dragon games, baby dragon
24:45games and so on.
24:46We used to play this game called Smorg's Treasure, in which where I would pretend we'd gather
24:52up a bunch of fake jewelry and beads and stuff like that, and I'd be curled around it on
24:56the bed and she would have to try and pick it out without me waking up, waking up and
25:02chasing her and so on.
25:03Just really enjoyable, crazy, goofy fun.
25:08Just really, really enjoy that time period.
25:10It's a fantastic aspect of parenting.
25:14So this I thought was interesting, complex and deep.
25:16What you have to remember, this is Reddit, what you have to remember about the past is
25:21that it literally doesn't exist.
25:23It exists only in your mind, your memories.
25:25No more real than a daydream is.
25:27Well, that's not quite true.
25:28That's not quite true.
25:29What you also have to remember is that your memories are most likely not as accurate as
25:34you think they are.
25:35They're colored by your emotions and how you were feeling and colored by your memory itself.
25:40Your mind exaggerates some things and totally forgets other things.
25:43Yes, it does that for sure, but not randomly.
25:50If you go for a daily walk through the park and then one day there's a bear, you're going
25:55to remember that day, but not just random or accidental, but because that's pretty essential.
26:01Remembering that day is pretty essential to your survival.
26:05So it's not totally random.
26:08Your memories are designed to keep you safe and to have you not repeat dangerous situations
26:14or to have you pursue positive situations.
26:17So it's not random.
26:20It's not just like shuffling the deck.
26:23So he says, someone else who experienced the same thing as you most likely remembers it
26:27much differently.
26:28Well, that's true, of course, because if you were abused as a child, your abuser is going
26:33to claim to remember it differently.
26:35So that's sort of a given.
26:39It's sort of like if there's a criminal, he's going to claim that he didn't do it, right?
26:44That his memory of the past is very different from yours and so on, right?
26:47So again, it's not totally random, but it is really important to remember some of the
26:50subjectivity of memory.
26:53Memories are not accurate and cannot be trusted.
26:55We gain our sense of self from our memories.
26:58So memories are not accurate and cannot be trusted.
27:00Again, I don't think that's true.
27:06It's not true.
27:08Could you not have any eyewitness?
27:11Now again, I know eyewitness testimony in trials and so on has some significant limitations
27:16and so on, but it's not the case that the memories are not accurate and cannot be trusted.
27:26I don't think that's true.
27:27That's kind of a gaslighting.
27:28So it's one of these things that's a bell curve, it's an Aristotelian mean.
27:33You don't want to entirely discount your memories, but you also don't want to treat them as objective
27:39documentary style photographs or videos viewed by an impassive observer.
27:44I get all of that.
27:45You want something in the middle.
27:46Don't discard your memories.
27:48Don't take them as pure gospel.
27:51We gain a sense of self from our memories.
27:52We decide who we are because of our memories.
27:56Yes, but memories are also not wildly inaccurate, right?
28:00I mean, when the last person dies who was in World War II, does that mean that World
28:11War II can be wished away?
28:13Nope.
28:15In some memories, if you sort of think about complex PTSD, some memories are inscribed
28:21not just in our minds and in our nervous systems and our bodies, but actually in our DNA because
28:26we can pass trauma along to kids simply based on how traumatized we were.
28:32So some of it can be passed along genetically, so that's not just like a dream at night,
28:37right?
28:38So you don't want to look at your memories like a dream at night, but again, you don't
28:40want to look at them as pure gospel.
28:44We write a story about our life and tell ourselves that story to form our sense of
28:47self.
28:48Not true.
28:50When you're a kid, you don't write the story of your life.
28:53Now, there's memories and then there's judgments, right?
28:58So if you have a memory, if you have continuous memories of your parents not spending any
29:03time with you and not showing any interest in you, I would assume that those memories
29:10are accurate.
29:13And then what happens is that's not the hard part.
29:16The hard part, because memories are in the past, but judgments are about the future,
29:20and in particular, morals are about the future.
29:23So what happens is if your parents ignored you when you were a child, you have clear
29:31memories of that.
29:34Now the problem is not fundamentally that your parents ignored you.
29:38The problem in terms of your future is the morals or the lessons or the self that you
29:44get out of being ignored.
29:47So if your parents ignore you and you say, as I think rationally you should, my parents
29:56were cold, withholding and or emotionally deficient and or whatever, whatever, and therefore
30:01they did not interact with me, but that has no bearing on my foundational worth, right?
30:10The problem is when you say, my parents ignored me because I'm worthless.
30:14It's the because I'm worthless, it's the conclusions from the memories that are malleable.
30:20The memories, of course, they're not photographs, they're somewhat malleable, but if my mother
30:29would scream as occasionally she did, she would scream, I hate you or whatever, mostly
30:34because she was, like I can say, oh my gosh, I'm hate-worthy, you know, whatever, right?
30:41Well no, I basically got instinctively then later on that she was just frustrated because
30:51she'd be dating some guy and then things wouldn't work out, and she told herself, as a lot of
30:57single mothers do, she told herself the story that the reason things didn't work out with
31:03the guy is because of her kids, right?
31:10My brother and me.
31:14So she didn't hate us, of course, we were pretty good kids, but she hated that the relationship
31:23didn't work out, she couldn't take responsibility for it herself or wouldn't, and so she had
31:30to come up with a scapegoat as to why the relationship didn't work out, and then it's
31:34like, oh, it's my kids, right?
31:36Now, even if it were true, we're still the result of her choice, and so we're still not
31:41to blame.
31:42So I never really got the sense that I was hateful or that I should be hated or anything
31:45like that, but that's, so remembering my mother screaming, I hate you, that's a fact,
31:53I know that for sure, but it's a conclusion, right?
31:57So the memories don't drive the conclusions, so it's because the past doesn't exist anymore
32:01and what you remember happening probably didn't happen the way you remember at all, not true,
32:06you can rewrite it, rewrite the story you tell about yourself to yourself, rewrite your
32:09personal story, rewrite your past, and you can rewrite yourself, right?
32:12So it's the conclusions about yourself that you get from your circumstances that is the
32:21most malleable, and that's, you know, a lot of times when I'm engaged in call-in shows
32:26with people, I'm challenging the narrative they have about their history.
32:30So memory is not the essential, it's the morality that matters.
32:36So this is interesting, and I won't play all of this, but this is from Heidi Moore,
32:43I've been witness to three generations of women with chronic illnesses being abandoned
32:47by their husbands.
32:48A lot of times they leave, not right away, they'll stay for about six months after the
32:51diagnosis and play the hero while everyone's still watching.
32:54Everyone's praising them for being brave and selfless, and then once the actual work begins,
32:58once it becomes unglamorous and hard, they dip out, and they do it in a way that leaves
33:02them feeling blameless, right?
33:03They pick fights, they start building resentment, they start manufacturing conflict, they start
33:07gaslighting.
33:09Essentially these men will do the things men do if they want out of a relationship, but
33:12they don't want to feel like the bad guy.
33:14Either that, or they kill their wife slowly through neglect.
33:18This is a systemic issue, this is a patriarchy issue.
33:21So this is interesting, and you know, obviously the last thing people want to do is think
33:26of their beloved spouse getting ill and so on, right?
33:30And marriages can be tough under certain circumstances.
33:37My wife and I have always gotten along famously and fabulously, but of course I got cancer
33:43years ago, and so there have been some things where there have been challenges.
33:48And life is just going to throw those kind of curveballs at you that is inevitable in
33:52many ways.
33:53I mean, the only way you can avoid any curveballs in life is never playing the game, and then
33:56you just get the curveball called massive regret.
34:01So this is interesting because marriage is a very complex thing in many ways, because
34:10it is both the practical pair-bonding requirement for raising children, and a romantic ideal
34:19of love.
34:21And these two things are tensions within the concept of marriage.
34:27And it's interesting because one flows from the other.
34:29So the best way to have a sustainable marriage is to experience a deep and passionate romantic
34:34love.
34:35That's the pair-bonding, right?
34:37I don't know how many, I don't think that many people in the modern world get to really
34:40feel this deep, passionate, intense love because there's not really enough objective virtue
34:45going on.
34:46But if we look at marriage as practical pair-bonding for the raising of children, then if your
34:53wife is, let's say she's 30 and she gets chronically ill, men have been programmed, this is not
34:59to take away free will, but I'm just talking about the instincts.
35:02Men have been programmed to procreate, right?
35:09Men have been programmed to procreate.
35:11In other words, we can look at the evolution of humanity, and let's say that, let's just
35:16take a most challenging evolutionary situation.
35:21So let's say that there's a man, and before his wife has children, she gets ill and therefore
35:31can't have kids for whatever reason, right?
35:34And then he is altruistic and kind and sensitive and thoughtful and devoted and attached to
35:40the point where he nurses her for the next 50 years, then he's 75 or 70 or whatever,
35:49right?
35:50Well, the genes that would be intertwined with that kind of behavior would die with
35:56him.
35:57Whereas the man who put in the requisite amount of time to not be perceived as a total cat
36:03or pursued this kind of strategy would have a believable story to tell a new bride and
36:09therefore the genes for this would reproduce, right?
36:16The genes for this kind of behavior would reproduce.
36:18And these are just brutal facts.
36:19Again, I'm not taking away free will, but it's really important to understand that which
36:24doesn't reproduce doesn't last, right?
36:26Genetically speaking, evolutionarily speaking, that which doesn't reproduce doesn't last.
36:34So if women are saying, well, men end up leaving women with chronic illnesses, well,
36:43that's also partly for the benefit of the children.
36:46Remember, marriage is there to create stable pair bonds for the healthy and productive
36:51raising of children, right?
36:54That's what it's for.
36:58So even if you have a woman who's got some chronic horrible ailment, for which, again,
37:04we have massive sympathy and understand all of that.
37:07But if you have a woman who has a chronic ailment to the point where she can barely
37:13get out of bed and is really wrecked in terms of energy and so on, okay, so let's say she's
37:22capable of having sex, you have sex, she gets pregnant, and then first of all the child
37:27birth might kill her in a weakened state, and then you end up with either a dead baby
37:32or a baby with no mother, or alternatively, what happens is she has the kid, whatever
37:42illness or ailment she has might pass through her breast milk or even through the umbilical
37:50cord, which again is very bad.
37:53But let's say that the child is born relatively healthy, but the mother is debilitated through
37:59an illness, well, what happens then?
38:06What happens?
38:09What happens?
38:11Then you have a child, or maybe even more than one child, you have a child that cannot
38:17be cared for by a disabled mother.
38:20I mean, I write about this in my novel, Almost, with Ruth and Quentin and Tom and Reginald.
38:31So you then have a child with a functionally disabled mother.
38:35Now think of the amount of labor that was required, particularly in our evolution without
38:39labor-saving devices.
38:40The family couldn't survive without two productive adults because somebody's got to keep the
38:48place clean, somebody's got to do the laundry, somebody's got to do the gathering, and somebody's
38:53got to take care of the kids.
38:54If the man's doing that, he can't be out planting crops or hunting or whatever.
38:59So if he stays with her, I understand that that's beneficial for her, and it may be beneficial
39:05to him in terms of pair bonding and love and devotion, but if he stays with her, his bloodline
39:13dies off.
39:16And what that means is that men who would have some predilection to stay with women
39:21like this, their bloodlines did not survive.
39:25Their bloodlines did not survive.
39:30And that's not the result of men being cold, mean, and cruel, right?
39:35That's not that.
39:38That's just the basic root biological fact.
39:42If men are cats who abandon disabled women, well, you can do the moralizing thing, right?
39:51Oh, women are so much nicer, and so on.
39:56But of course, women cheat about the same, this is kind of cheating maybe, but women
39:59cheat at about the same rate as men.
40:02So the first question, I think, for intelligent people is to say, okay, well, is there an
40:07evolutionary advantage to this kind of behavior?
40:12That's the first intelligent question.
40:14If there is evolutionary advantage to this type of behavior, then you can blame Mother
40:20Nature, you can blame the harsh conditions of evolution, you can blame God, you can blame
40:25whatever, but blaming men is pointless and pathetic, and this sort of lack of sympathy
40:35for evolutionary pressures and how it's guided both male and female behavior, it's just this
40:39finger-wagging moralizing I just find to be embarrassing and stupid.
40:43All right.
40:45James Earl Jones was only 43 when he took on Shakespeare's King Lear in 1974, and I
40:52didn't, I don't know.
40:58I mean, I like James Earl Jones as a whole.
40:59See, I find his acting here to be kind of whiny.
41:23I mean, this is a king who has been endowed with godlike authority since the day of his
41:28birth, and he seems like a frustrated younger sibling.
41:47This is interesting because thinking in terms of the black community, the family structure
41:51as a whole, if we go back a tiny bit, look at the coldness of that actress, right?
41:56So this is Lear torching Cordelia, and she is scorning, and so I think this is the slightly
42:08emasculated son of a single mother, complaining and weak, I don't think it's the right interpretation.
42:21He shouldn't be raising his eyebrows.
42:22Sorry to be an egg.
42:23But she may feel how sharper than a serpent's tooth it is to have a thankless child.
42:31Away!
42:32Away!
42:33See, now, he shouldn't be storming out.
42:34That's an act of weakness.
42:37He should be towering over her.
42:38She should be sobbing, right, because if she's not, the pathos is that Cordelia, of course,
42:45is the one, unlike Arnold and Regan, Cordelia is the one who genuinely cares about her father,
42:52and so the fact that she's cold and indifferent to his speech is entirely the wrong reading,
42:55and I think comes more out of the single mother and frustrated son that's a little bit more
43:00prevalent in the black community, but to me, this is an entire misreading of the clear
43:04intent of the play.
43:06The pathos is that he's raging against the only child who really loves him, but if she's
43:10cold, harsh, and indifferent, she's playing it sort of the proud black woman stereotype,
43:15and he's playing sort of the whiny, storming out, teenage boy stereotype, entirely the
43:19wrong reading.
43:20All right.
43:21Yes, yes, yes, I talked about this months ago, actually, I talked about this years ago
43:28with regards to COVID, and Mike Cernovich wrote, when East Germany fell, there was a
43:35museum opened on all the spying and tips.
43:37It was friends and family, even spouses, who reported people to the Stasi.
43:40Your anti-Trump friends will send you two gulags.
43:42This isn't a guess, it's happened, they're all the same.
43:44I think that's a bit harsh, but nonetheless, it is really, really important to, and we
43:49saw this, of course, under COVID.
43:52How many frustrated, thwarted, petty, vengeful, vicious, nasty little bullies came crawling
43:57out of the woodwork when it came to reporting, he's got an extra car in his driveway, he's
44:01not social distancing.
44:02I mean, they all seem to gravitate towards, what is this sort of cliche, that they gravitate
44:06towards the HOAs, homeowners associations, and so on, but yes, be careful, be careful,
44:19as political power increases, be careful of those who will side with the state, even
44:25at your own expense, and don't think that family is a protection.
44:29Historically, it has not been at all.
44:32All right, let's see here.
44:35As a percentage of women responding yes to sexually aggressive behavior, you can pause,
44:42of course, and all of this.
44:45You overestimated partner's desire, 71%.
44:48You attempted to arouse partner, 85.7%, that's fine.
44:51You threatened to end the relationship without sex, 31.6%.
44:56You said things you did not mean, 43%.
45:02You pressured with verbal arguments.
45:03You questioned partner's sexuality.
45:05So a third of women, apparently, this is an older one, right, but a third of women say
45:09that they have basically hinted that a man is gay if he doesn't want to have sex.
45:15You flirted to make someone else jealous, almost half.
45:19Anyway, this sort of goes on and on.
45:21It is by threatening to use physical force, sexual aggressive, that's 27.8%, by using
45:27physical force, like one out of five women in this, right?
45:31So that is, when he was a minor and you were not, 29.3%, yeah, yeah, yeah.
45:38Strategies that would traditionally be defined as coercive if applied to male relationships,
45:41lying, threatening to end a relationship, verbal pressure to have sex.
45:45From 26 to 36% of women reported strategies traditionally defined as abusive.
45:52These strategies are using your position as a power or authority.
45:55I've certainly had that, women who offered to advance my career in various areas if I
45:59slept with them.
46:00Never did, of course.
46:02But I knew my Bible.
46:07Treating him drunk or drugged or taking advantage of a man while he was in a compromising position.
46:11Approximately 20% of the women reported using physical force, 27% the threat of physical
46:16force, and 9% a weapon to obtain sexual contact with a male partner.
46:21So that's not ideal, to put it mildly, right?
46:27So that is wild.
46:33Because one purpose of this study was to document the range of college women's sexual aggression,
46:37it is important to note that between 26 and 43% of all women respondents reported, oh,
46:48I'm sorry if that's gone somewhere else.
46:51But yes, it is, and this is from some time ago, and I don't think that women have become
46:55less aggressive as a whole.
46:59This is Andrew Wilson who wrote, I have realized that after talking to hundreds upon hundreds
47:04of women that any illusions I had that they were in any way benevolent or the less predatory
47:07sex is completely delusional.
47:12And I mean, he of course is talking to a fairly self-selected group of people.
47:17I mean, I'm aware that in the call-in shows are a self-selecting group of people, a lot
47:22of whom are highly intelligent and with particular challenges in their life.
47:26It is not a representative sample of humanity as a whole.
47:30And it's important, of course, you know, it's like the doctor saying, oh my gosh, everyone
47:34has some physical ailment.
47:36Everyone appears to be sick.
47:37And it's like, well, but you're the doctor, it's generally how they'll count, so I think
47:41that's important.
47:42Oops.
47:43Now it's lost my spot, right?
47:46That's all right, we'll go down.
47:49Pick it up really quickly.
47:53This I thought was interesting.
47:55Somebody wrote, Zoe Harkam dropped the car off for a service.
47:59The garage owner had a zero tolerance abuse towards abuse of staff notice.
48:03I asked him about it and he shared multiple examples of nasty incidents.
48:07He said, it's got much worse since COVID.
48:09It reminded me when we arrived in Cyprus, the taxi rank women said, it might be a bit
48:13of a wait.
48:14We said, no problem.
48:15She said, you have no idea if the abuse I get when I say that it's got much worse since
48:18COVID.
48:19Why?
48:20People more stressed, less tolerant, more expectant, that they can get others to do
48:23what they want.
48:24Yeah, I've noticed this too.
48:25I had to go and talk to my cell phone provider the other day and there was a big sign on
48:30the door.
48:31I tried to open the door.
48:32In the middle of the business day, the door was locked.
48:38So I had to ring the bell and I saw a note on the door which said, because of the rising
48:44prevalence of theft, they have to manually unlock the door from inside.
48:51And then there were these big signs of verbal abuse and so on, will not be tolerated.
48:56I've seen this in doctor's offices and dentist's offices and other places and I certainly didn't
49:00remember seeing that when I was younger.
49:02So yeah, I mean, there of course is some cultural clashes based on immigration, but there's
49:09a general sense post COVID that the social contract has been largely wrecked.
49:22So the social contract has been largely wrecked.
49:25So the vaccinated were told that the unvaccinated are selfish and want them to die and delusional
49:32and listening to conspiracy theories and so on, right?
49:34So that's what the vaccinated were told and the unvaccinated believe that the vaccinated
49:49were just sheep lining up to get jabbed because the TV told them to when they got a free donut
49:54in a parking lot.
49:56And the amount of tension and hostility, right?
50:00So ideology kind of bubbles, it's like this old Marxist statement, there are decades where
50:05nothing happens and then there are weeks when decades happen.
50:08So ideology kind of bubbles in the underground.
50:12It's like termites in your house, right?
50:15Nothing really happens until the whole damn thing collapses.
50:19You don't really notice anything and then suddenly half the house collapses.
50:27Ideologies like that.
50:28So the left and the right sort of agree to disagree and you just kind of avoid the topics
50:32and so on.
50:34But when it comes to something as immediate as say the COVID jabs or compliance or social
50:38distancing or people who believe that a small piece of plexiglass will protect you from
50:45the cashier who's just been touching all of your food and so on.
50:48When people realize that the termites of ideology have undermined the social contract, it takes
50:58one large thing to set that all off.
51:01And that large thing was COVID.
51:05I mean, another one of the topics is high levels of immigration or taxes or the debt
51:11or whatever it is, right?
51:13And so people can ignore ideology in the same way they can ignore like toxic ideology.
51:18They can ignore that in the way that they can ignore termites eating away at the foundations
51:24of the house or whatever it is.
51:26But then, right, at some point it only takes, I mean, each individual termite is like, oh
51:33my gosh, we're never going to take this house down.
51:35Eventually they do.
51:37So I think social contractors, and this funny thing too, because, and I've mentioned this
51:42before, you know, for decades, I was saying we should privatize healthcare, should privatize
51:50education.
51:51And of course I was told, well, these things are human rights, absolutely necessary.
51:57We can't possibly live without these things.
52:01And how dare you, right?
52:04How dare you even suggest that people go five minutes without these services.
52:08And then, well, they were mostly shut down for like a year or two.
52:12And that's bizarre that people just accepted that.
52:17So yeah, I think social contracts mostly toast.
52:20Something I'm going to watch later, something I'm going to do later.
52:23And let's see here.
52:25Most men get zero attention from women in their 20s.
52:28In their 30s, they start to be able to date and stuff.
52:31Women who hit that age expect men to settle down.
52:33Men just want to experience what women experienced when they were in their prime.
52:37It's a bit unfair to tell a man who suffered for 15 to 20 years that he has to cuck to
52:41manage life the moment he becomes desirable.
52:44Hence a plummeting birth rate.
52:45And it's a brilliant statement.
52:48It's a brilliant statement.
52:50Now this was not my experience.
52:53And again, I don't want to make this all about me, but I think it's a brilliant statement
52:57because it reveals something to me that I did not experience.
53:00My prime dating years were like 15 to 30.
53:08And I was in high demand, and I was a good-looking young man, and by 30, I'd lost most of my
53:18hair and so on, and for some guys, that looks okay.
53:22I think for me, it's okay, but generally, it's not as desirable as a full head of hair
53:26and so on, right?
53:27So I had a pretty cool 15 years of dating around.
53:33And then of course, I had office jobs and gained a bit of weight, and I've lost it since,
53:38but I was not at peak sexiness at that time after sort of in my 30s.
53:44But I think for a lot of men, it's different.
53:48So for a lot of men, when they're younger, they're not that attractive, the women are
53:51looking for the chads, all of that, and they really can't get many, if any, dates.
53:59But then when they get into their late 30s, and they are making some good coin, and maybe
54:05they've looked maxed a little bit, and they've glowed up a little bit, look at me using all
54:09the modern lingo, and then they're in high demand, and then they want to play the field.
54:17He meant for the streets, right?
54:18So they want to play the field.
54:20And I can really understand that, it really makes sense to me, and it is just one of these
54:25tragic mismatches that it's really hard to do much about at the moment.
54:32This person's parents passed, and they didn't want any of their antiques, right?
54:40Even really need sound for this.
54:41But so this is really interesting, and of course this brings back a bit of a sore spot
54:44for me in that my mother beat the hell out of me because I left a white ring on one of
54:49her little dressers, or coffee tables, or side tables, I think it was a dresser.
54:54So look at all of this, right?
54:56All of this work.
54:57They went to antique stores, right?
55:00They went to antique stores, and then they sanded things down, and then they got just
55:05the right stain, and they got it all preserved, and now where's it going, right?
55:11Where's all this work, this focus, this effort, this energy, this attention, where's it all
55:14going?
55:16It's going into the landfill.
55:17Look at that.
55:18It probably took them months to restore.
55:21Look at that beautiful lacquer on that table, it's antique.
55:25It took them months to find, thousands of dollars to buy, to restore, and then it goes
55:32into the Pac-Man crunchy crunch of history.
55:35Isn't that wild?
55:37Look at that.
55:40Beautiful piece.
55:42Nobody wants it, nobody's gonna use it, nobody wants to transport it.
55:47It's endable.
55:48I mean, it's really sad, right?
55:51This is what happens to your life when you're dead.
55:54All right, I think we'll stop here, because it's been a fairly lengthy chat, but I really
55:59do thank you for your time and attention, freedomain.com to help out the show.
56:06Thank you for your support, lots of love, I'll talk to you soon, bye.