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00:00:00Police say it was inside this small Hollywood apartment.
00:00:04Lopez constructed a device designed to spray sulfuric acid on the singer.
00:00:09He then concealed it in a hollowed out book and mailed it to Bjork in London, England.
00:00:14Fortunately for the singer, Lopez documented it all on videotape.
00:00:25Testing 1, 2, 3, testing. Testing 1, 2, 3.
00:00:30Testing 1, 2, 3.
00:00:55My name is Ricardo Lopez.
00:00:59It is January 14th, 1996.
00:01:06Today is my birthday. I'm 21.
00:01:11Yesterday I purchased this camera.
00:01:15And I will begin a documentation of my life, of my art, and of my plans.
00:01:23Do you want to see something funny?
00:01:26I'm going to show you who I am.
00:01:40Comfort is what I seek in speaking to you.
00:01:44Something that makes me feel better.
00:01:46For a long time I've been speaking into the mirror and being my own psychologist.
00:01:53It's a release.
00:01:55As many times as my art is.
00:01:57I'm not going to try and pretend I'm smart or savvy or cool.
00:02:02I've got to pass that. I've got to be honest.
00:02:05You are a camera. I am Ricardo.
00:02:10I might as well begin.
00:02:13Bjork has been an incredible part of my mind.
00:02:20I started with a crush and ended up with an obsession.
00:02:25It sort of has calmed down at times.
00:02:30I've been okay with it.
00:02:32The flaring usually comes about by reading an article.
00:02:36I got enthusiastic about sending for more information about her and all that stuff.
00:02:42Let me show you. See all these?
00:02:45These are money order receipts.
00:02:48All sorts of information.
00:02:50Where she lives.
00:02:52Autographs, posters.
00:02:55Perhaps let me give you a little example.
00:02:59Look at this beautiful face.
00:03:02This cute, innocent, sweet and shy thing.
00:03:08She's fucking a nigger.
00:03:11Yes.
00:03:13Fucking nigger.
00:03:16That's unacceptable.
00:03:20I'm just going to have to kill her.
00:03:25I've been planning it the best we can have.
00:03:29I'm going to send a package.
00:03:32A lightweight business cardboard folder.
00:03:36I'm going to pretend to be a company from New York City.
00:03:42I want to make it look like I'm sending it to her.
00:03:46It's going to be a legitimate looking company.
00:03:49I'm going to make it look not unlike an interview magazine thing.
00:03:54Not random, but not exclusively sent to her.
00:03:59It's going to be about this thick.
00:04:02A quarter inch.
00:04:05The number one word is trust.
00:04:10The package will be sent to her when she is there in London.
00:04:15I know that she's not touring.
00:04:17She's in her house.
00:04:18Whatever.
00:04:19Recording.
00:04:20Perfect.
00:04:21Okay, she's going to receive the package.
00:04:23Boom.
00:04:24It's going to be a booby trap.
00:04:26It's going to have a little bit of a surprise.
00:04:35The master blaster.
00:04:41That's a hypodermic needle.
00:04:45No poison.
00:04:53Those two hypodermic needles are going to poke her thumbs.
00:04:57Thus introducing the true bloodstream.
00:05:00HIV contaminated blood.
00:05:04I'm not going to go to prison.
00:05:08I'm not going to go to prison.
00:05:10This is going to take a lot of time.
00:05:12A lot of time.
00:05:14The reason why I'm doing this.
00:05:17I'm going to have to kill myself.
00:05:24That's why I'm in no hurry.
00:05:30Document every step of the way.
00:05:34I think she will pay.
00:05:37She's going to fucking die, that's for sure.
00:05:40Or at least fucking get scared out of her fucking ass.
00:05:46Yep, yep.
00:05:47That's my goal.
00:05:48Kill her.
00:05:49Scare her.
00:05:50Don't face her.
00:05:52Perhaps these tapes.
00:05:55And more than anything, know of my fucking existence.
00:06:01You know, that's a good motivator.
00:06:06To make these tapes.
00:06:10For one day, for her to see.
00:06:13And why would she want to?
00:06:15To learn more about me.
00:06:17The guy who completely changed her life.
00:06:21And will end her life.
00:06:24I am the angel of death for her.
00:06:31The Angel of Death
00:06:37Okay, today's Monday.
00:06:40It's about 12 o'clock.
00:06:42P.M.
00:06:44And um...
00:06:47I gotta check if there's anybody down there.
00:06:53I feel it in my head, you know.
00:06:56Now I'm thinking about um...
00:06:58One day she'll ever see this, you know.
00:07:03Like I have all my taped library.
00:07:06To see who I really am, you know.
00:07:09Who I really was.
00:07:11You know, maybe she's curious.
00:07:13Maybe she'll have an interest in me.
00:07:15You know.
00:07:17This right here.
00:07:19Is uh, my uh...
00:07:22I don't know, I guess you could say option number one.
00:07:27This little mechanism right here.
00:07:30Okay.
00:07:31It's a little triangle that's gonna be uh...
00:07:34Offset, it's not gonna be a perfect little triangle.
00:07:37But uh, my initial...
00:07:40I don't know, design ideas.
00:07:42Especially the way I designed this one.
00:07:44Is that each of these are gonna be layers of foam core.
00:07:50Well...
00:07:53My major uh, conclusion today.
00:07:56Is that all what I'm gonna do.
00:07:58My infection process.
00:08:03It's gonna be an attempt to um...
00:08:05That's not gonna be a major thing.
00:08:08Major thing I want for her.
00:08:11While she's dying.
00:08:13Okay, I wanna be the most influential person.
00:08:16Just like in my fantasy about going back in time.
00:08:19And taking back the material.
00:08:21For her to uh...
00:08:22You know, all her materials.
00:08:24I'll talk later.
00:08:25But um...
00:08:26I wanna um...
00:08:28I wanna be the biggest influence in her life.
00:08:30The man...
00:08:32Person who...
00:08:34The most influential.
00:08:36The most important person who changed her life more than anybody else.
00:08:40Okay, the guy who took her life.
00:08:43Okay.
00:08:44Now oddly enough, people get interested in a person like that.
00:08:47That would be the only reason why anybody would sit through...
00:08:50You know...
00:08:52You know, dozens and dozens of hours...
00:08:55Of unedited home diaries.
00:08:59I'm making.
00:09:01But um...
00:09:03But to keep in mind, I'm making this for my own personal record.
00:09:07Not to impress her like I said yesterday.
00:09:09Just...
00:09:10You know, let myself know...
00:09:12Who I am.
00:09:13Okay.
00:09:14Find comfort in that.
00:09:17By the way, I did learn an interesting quote today.
00:09:19It says,
00:09:20Only when all those around you are different will you...
00:09:24Truly belong.
00:09:27That's an interesting quote.
00:09:34I want her to be more interested in me than anything else.
00:09:39I want her to sit down and...
00:09:41You know...
00:09:42I'm gonna make an edited version.
00:09:44You know, I direct.
00:09:46This is Ricardo to Bjork.
00:09:49You know, VHS video.
00:09:52Okay, like an hour or two long.
00:09:54You know...
00:09:55Directly towards her.
00:09:57And at the same time, send her all my personal diaries and these tapes.
00:10:02For her...
00:10:04You know, she wants to have the option to go in deeper in my psyche.
00:10:08To figure out why would anybody do this and who was that person.
00:10:12And you know...
00:10:14Somebody did that to me.
00:10:16What kind of person was this?
00:10:18You know, you got time to think and stuff.
00:10:23I told Ralph yesterday.
00:10:25No, the day before yesterday we were talking.
00:10:27And...
00:10:28We were talking about his ex-girlfriend and this and that.
00:10:31You know...
00:10:32And I mentioned the fact that...
00:10:34What if he saw his ex-girlfriend which he really loved...
00:10:38You know, in a strip bar.
00:10:40Stripping down and stuff like that.
00:10:42I was like...
00:10:43Oh no...
00:10:44Imagine...
00:10:45And...
00:10:46You know, we got in...
00:10:47Talking about it.
00:10:48And I mentioned just to see what he would say.
00:10:51I said...
00:10:52I told him...
00:10:53You know, just because you kill somebody doesn't mean you don't love them.
00:10:55He goes...
00:10:56Yeah, yeah, you're right.
00:10:57Yeah, just because you kill somebody doesn't mean you're wrong.
00:11:00So...
00:11:01I didn't expect that but...
00:11:02That's interesting.
00:11:04Very interesting.
00:11:06Enough for right now.
00:11:13I just got back from Rob's house.
00:11:17Yeah, I went over there to hook him up.
00:11:20He had gotten a subwoofer.
00:11:22And I took...
00:11:24You know, the crossover thing that I have.
00:11:27An amplifier.
00:11:28And I went over there and helped him.
00:11:30You know, connecting and stuff.
00:11:31It sounds great, man.
00:11:32Great bass.
00:11:33I said, fuck it.
00:11:34You know, I was going to work tonight but...
00:11:36I got lazy.
00:11:38I'm going to call it a night because I'm very sleepy.
00:11:42I'll see you later on.
00:11:54Look how thick this is.
00:11:58And it's super, super strong.
00:12:05I'm going to be using that cardboard.
00:12:07But you know what?
00:12:09I was going to buy a sheet of foam core.
00:12:14Yeah, foam core.
00:12:16They have different thicknesses.
00:12:18They're much thicker than this.
00:12:20And even about like an inch thick.
00:12:22Very strong.
00:12:23Very durable.
00:12:24But too big.
00:12:25Too thick.
00:12:26Okay.
00:12:27And it'll never be as strong as this type of cardboard.
00:12:30If I put two pieces of this cardboard together...
00:12:33Forget it.
00:12:34Awesome as hell.
00:12:35You know, I'm always looking at the...
00:12:38You know, meanings that aren't there.
00:12:41That's notorious of myself.
00:12:43So this will help me out a bit.
00:12:45I also got something for sure that's going to help me.
00:12:48It's the Rugged II.
00:12:51The new Thesaurus.
00:12:53Very well done.
00:12:55And it has all the synonyms and anonyms.
00:12:58Everything you need to do.
00:13:00Sometimes I end up repeating words time and time again.
00:13:03Especially with the first letter that I sent.
00:13:07You know, the first letter that I sent to Bjork.
00:13:11This is Axe.
00:13:13Basically, it's a listing of all the artists.
00:13:18You know, all the celebrities' addresses and stuff like that.
00:13:23And here they describe how much it cost.
00:13:26You know, the celebrity address list is $30.
00:13:29It has a complete listing of over 10,000 names and addresses of celebrities.
00:13:35Where I'm going to send for Bjork.
00:13:37Right here, it's $5 a copy.
00:13:39Okay, it's a specific artist.
00:13:41Okay.
00:13:43What I'm going to show you is about as self-incriminating as it gets.
00:13:51The purpose?
00:13:53To buy time.
00:13:55You know what that means.
00:13:57This is me.
00:13:59Okay, I'm going to travel to New York more likely.
00:14:03I'm going to travel to New York more likely.
00:14:05Okay.
00:14:07Plan a seat.
00:14:08Now that is.
00:14:10I'm going to go all the way to London.
00:14:12My package is.
00:14:13Not me.
00:14:15I'm going to go to New York.
00:14:17From there, she's going to contact the New Scotland Yard.
00:14:23Lead steps.
00:14:25This is what I think the FBI will try to do to stop me.
00:14:31First and foremost, they're going to search for all possible leads from the past.
00:14:37Any suspicious fan letters, previous stalkers, death threats, the basics.
00:14:43My number one problem is this right here.
00:14:47I got something hiding in my closet.
00:14:49In 1994, I sent a package to Electro Records for New York.
00:15:03I can in no way, shape, or form.
00:15:07Okay.
00:15:09Allow them to know that I am an exterminator.
00:15:11Okay, because automatically.
00:15:13You see, I'm going to be on a list.
00:15:15Okay.
00:15:16See, they have me on record because of the thing that I sent.
00:15:19Military and prison records.
00:15:21Okay.
00:15:22Now, I was going to use that as more of a threatening type of thing.
00:15:26Like, you know, for like if this fails.
00:15:29You know, like if she doesn't get infected.
00:15:31You know, I'm going to tell her that.
00:15:33And I'm going to go after her.
00:15:34You know, finish her job and this and that.
00:15:36And to, you know, let her know that I'm quite capable of doing such a task.
00:15:40It gives me more.
00:15:41It makes me more of a threat.
00:15:43Okay.
00:15:44Because I've done it before.
00:15:45And I'll do it again.
00:15:46So, it's more fear factor.
00:15:48This right here is my friend.
00:15:49Right here.
00:15:50This is my friend.
00:15:51Through this door.
00:15:53Going to come Papa John's.
00:15:56What's up?
00:15:58I was doing a holiday.
00:16:03About 430 I came.
00:16:05Slept, so.
00:16:07Just woke up.
00:16:08Getting all pumped up.
00:16:09And I'm going to go.
00:16:14I don't want to.
00:16:15I want to be dumber.
00:16:16I'm not sure exactly.
00:16:18If I want them to overestimate my capabilities.
00:16:21And or my intelligence.
00:16:23Or I want them to underestimate.
00:16:25Right now.
00:16:26I'm leaning towards underestimation.
00:16:28They won't think I'm smart enough to do something.
00:16:31And obviously, you know.
00:16:33Hopefully, I will be able to.
00:16:35So, I think I'd rather them underestimate my capabilities.
00:16:40Okay.
00:16:41I surely don't want to stress my greatest aspect.
00:16:44Okay.
00:16:45Because they're going to use that against me.
00:16:47It's something which I have to think about.
00:16:57Mr. Park Dietz.
00:17:02Mr. Park Dietz.
00:17:04Or Dietz.
00:17:05Or whatever you fucking pronounce his name.
00:17:07He was a psychologist.
00:17:08Or one of them.
00:17:09Which analyzed my bizarre communications.
00:17:13As he stressed in the book later on.
00:17:16Would they still keep it?
00:17:20Maybe as a sort of prime example of what a psycho male is.
00:17:24Maybe they have it in their lobby.
00:17:25It's what you would expect a typical psycho to send.
00:17:29You know.
00:17:30It's like from a Hollywood script.
00:17:32You know.
00:17:33Some crazy ass.
00:17:34You know.
00:17:35Bloody cross.
00:17:36With a bullet through it.
00:17:37With a CD.
00:17:38You know.
00:17:39Lots of pictures of her.
00:17:40You know.
00:17:41You know.
00:17:42Weird images.
00:17:43You know.
00:17:44Collages.
00:17:45It's fucking weird.
00:17:46You know.
00:17:47It's big.
00:17:48So, it would be a nice centerpiece.
00:17:49You know.
00:17:50As a display or something.
00:17:51You know.
00:17:52So, they might have it in their office.
00:17:53I'm afraid I found the Achilles heel.
00:17:57Of this.
00:17:58Of the board that I found.
00:18:00I love it's rigidity.
00:18:02But.
00:18:03As far as it's construction sense.
00:18:05Check it out.
00:18:08Lots of miniature little layers.
00:18:10I mean.
00:18:11Everything has a weak spot.
00:18:12Everything.
00:18:13You know.
00:18:14Trial and error.
00:18:15That's how I'm going to figure it out.
00:18:16I'm certainly not going to use this piece.
00:18:17I got my fingerprints all over that thing.
00:18:19More importantly than anything else.
00:18:22Okay.
00:18:23Is the time.
00:18:24That.
00:18:25From which I will send this.
00:18:26You know.
00:18:27There's nothing more caught fierce.
00:18:28Than a guy who has nothing to lose.
00:18:30I know.
00:18:31As much as I try to pretend how clever I am.
00:18:34Okay.
00:18:35I can't match.
00:18:36I'm stupid.
00:18:37A lot of ways I'm pretty stupid.
00:18:39You know.
00:18:40You know.
00:18:41I make mistakes.
00:18:42I'm not that meticulous.
00:18:43I'm sloppy.
00:18:44If you take a look around my apartment.
00:18:52Here's a sculpture which I'm creating of New York.
00:18:55This is the first date that I'm showing you.
00:19:02See I live in a practical pig stack.
00:19:07Look at this shit.
00:19:09See that.
00:19:10This is my apartment.
00:19:11I'm a pig.
00:19:13I'm a fucking pig.
00:19:15I got a catch up there.
00:19:17My bed.
00:19:18My bed is leaning up against the wall.
00:19:20Okay.
00:19:22Definite pig.
00:19:26There's my infamous drawing table.
00:19:29A folk table.
00:19:31I want to get a shot of my.
00:19:33Where I keep all my goodies.
00:19:35My books and all my shit.
00:19:38Look at that.
00:19:40This is my fucking bathroom.
00:19:46And most importantly.
00:19:48What you're looking at here.
00:19:50That's me man.
00:19:56That's it baby.
00:20:00This is my apartment.
00:20:06I start off this tape.
00:20:08From.
00:20:10It is the 18th still.
00:20:12No.
00:20:14It's already the 19th.
00:20:16So it's okay.
00:20:18Look at my face.
00:20:20I don't know if you can see that.
00:20:22Look at this.
00:20:24These marks right here.
00:20:26That was from.
00:20:28I just got back from New York.
00:20:30I just got back from New York.
00:20:32I just got back from New York.
00:20:34I just got back from Tutomato.
00:20:36Italian restaurant.
00:20:38Killing flies.
00:20:40I had to super, super, super.
00:20:42You know.
00:20:44Put the fog around the thickest.
00:20:46And I fogged the whole place.
00:20:48With that.
00:20:50A chemical called Vectrin.
00:20:52Specifically for.
00:20:54Sewer flies.
00:21:04Oh.
00:21:24This.
00:21:26Happiness.
00:21:28In a bag.
00:21:31I'm beginning to make.
00:21:33The first prototype.
00:21:35I'm just testing out different ideas.
00:21:37And.
00:21:39More importantly.
00:21:41Like structural strengths.
00:21:43Of different materials.
00:21:45Like this.
00:21:47This is going to go.
00:21:49Right on top of here.
00:21:51Open up like that.
00:21:53Right here.
00:21:55Are going to be the syringes.
00:21:57I mean this is not the real thing.
00:21:59This is just a practice.
00:22:01It has to be as different.
00:22:03As my other pieces possible.
00:22:05My other piece was very.
00:22:07I don't know.
00:22:09Energetically created.
00:22:11Spontaneous.
00:22:13This is more meticulous.
00:22:15More well thought of.
00:22:17Like the cycle.
00:22:19In the line of fire type of thing.
00:22:21Testing out my theories.
00:22:23On the strengths.
00:22:25And the way it's going to look.
00:22:29Before I go.
00:22:31A few interesting things have happened.
00:22:33Yesterday for example.
00:22:35I was talking to my brother.
00:22:37And we were talking about.
00:22:39We were in Mario's pizza.
00:22:41Well we got on the subject of eating.
00:22:43And you know.
00:22:45Eating too much.
00:22:47And I don't know.
00:22:49Because I was going for that extra slice of pizza.
00:22:51And you know he goes.
00:22:53Oh you're going to get sick.
00:22:55And this and that.
00:22:57He's well aware of the fact.
00:22:59That he's even afraid.
00:23:01Because I have.
00:23:03Mentioned to him in the past.
00:23:05About you know.
00:23:07Living life to the fullest.
00:23:09Enjoying living for the day.
00:23:11Because hey you never know.
00:23:13One day you're going to die.
00:23:15And this and that.
00:23:17And he's well aware of the fact.
00:23:19That my line of thinking is a little bit awkward.
00:23:21Because of the fact that I know I'm going to die.
00:23:23Not because I'm a wicked person.
00:23:25You know I'm not doing what's right.
00:23:27But anyway.
00:23:29He's well aware of the fact.
00:23:31That I plan to die.
00:23:33Before Armageddon.
00:23:35You know I mentioned to him.
00:23:37A couple of years back.
00:23:39That I'm going to go all blaze.
00:23:41And I was being reprimanded.
00:23:43For one of the jobs that we did.
00:23:45I didn't do something correctly.
00:23:47And it escalated.
00:23:49And since I do have.
00:23:51A severe emotional.
00:23:53Loss of control.
00:23:55And I got very.
00:23:57I was like crying and stuff like that.
00:23:59Angry but like crying.
00:24:01Losing control.
00:24:03And I started hitting the truck.
00:24:05And saying you have no idea.
00:24:07What I'm capable of.
00:24:09You think you know me.
00:24:11But you don't know me.
00:24:13The things that are coming to my head.
00:24:15I have access to.
00:24:17Very destructive chemicals.
00:24:19And this and that.
00:24:21Since then.
00:24:23He's been well aware of the fact.
00:24:25That I plan on doing something.
00:24:27I also mentioned to the fact.
00:24:29Of buying a gun.
00:24:31Getting a loaded gun.
00:24:33And that's when he got really scared.
00:24:35He even called my parents in Uruguay.
00:24:37Called my brother in Atlanta.
00:24:39See I have a very loving family.
00:24:41You know unlike many people.
00:24:43And I really don't appreciate it that much.
00:24:45Because I guess since I have it.
00:24:47My father and my mother.
00:24:49I'm just not right.
00:24:51I'm perfectly sane.
00:24:53Okay.
00:24:55I know exactly what's right and wrong.
00:24:57And I choose the paths that I choose.
00:24:59Anyway.
00:25:01Getting back to the point.
00:25:03He's very afraid.
00:25:05That I'm going to shoot myself.
00:25:13You're thinking about yourself.
00:25:15What about the others.
00:25:17You know.
00:25:19Death is expensive.
00:25:21He wasn't doing that to be.
00:25:23I don't know what his intentions were.
00:25:25But I know it wasn't like reverse psychology.
00:25:27Or being utterly sarcastic.
00:25:29Provoke me to have an emotional breakdown.
00:25:31I don't think that's his plan either.
00:25:33But fortunately.
00:25:35And surprisingly.
00:25:37I was able to maintain myself in both situations.
00:25:39Quite clear minded.
00:25:41George was talking to Ralph.
00:25:43He said.
00:25:45He goes.
00:25:47That would kill my mother.
00:25:49And I'm in 100% agreeance with that.
00:25:53I mean.
00:25:55My mother has a love for me that.
00:25:57It's.
00:26:01You know.
00:26:05So it's.
00:26:07I kind of.
00:26:11So.
00:26:13So I know.
00:26:17Whatever I do.
00:26:21I can't do it until she's dead.
00:26:25She's been a tremendously.
00:26:27Loving mother.
00:26:29And.
00:26:31You know she deserves.
00:26:33She deserves better.
00:26:35And I'm not going to do that to her.
00:26:37Doctor.
00:26:39My.
00:26:41Psychiatrist or psychologist or whatever.
00:26:43But.
00:26:47I really don't miss them.
00:26:51George is a very straight forward.
00:26:53That's the truth.
00:26:55Say the truth.
00:26:57I'm not going to hide the truth type of guy.
00:26:59He tells her that I'm thinking about buying a gun.
00:27:01And this and that.
00:27:03And that's just completely overwhelming.
00:27:05I said.
00:27:07What do you mean?
00:27:09I didn't think I'm going to kill myself or something like that.
00:27:11I didn't.
00:27:13I didn't tell George.
00:27:15I never said that.
00:27:17And I never had any plans.
00:27:19Of just blowing myself away.
00:27:25I never had a plan.
00:27:27To commit suicide.
00:27:29Not while my mother's alive.
00:27:31Since I got this camera.
00:27:33That's one of the major reasons.
00:27:35I found a lot of confidence.
00:27:37Speaking into my mirror.
00:27:39Releasing a lot of things.
00:27:41And sometimes even though I don't have.
00:27:43I mean I got a close relationship with George.
00:27:45But.
00:27:47A lot of the things that I tell him.
00:27:49It can be used against me.
00:27:51Even though sometimes I have a huge desire.
00:27:53To speak it.
00:27:55And sometimes I do it.
00:27:57And I pay the consequences for it.
00:27:59If I speak about something so emotional to me.
00:28:01I'll have an emotional breakdown.
00:28:03Like the piece of shit that I am.
00:28:05Or I'll try to mask it.
00:28:07With anger.
00:28:09My emotional level.
00:28:11Chemicals.
00:28:13I know exactly which chemicals there are.
00:28:15I saw a documentary on the brain.
00:28:17They flare up.
00:28:19My mother a lot of times.
00:28:21She gets sad.
00:28:23And she'll cry.
00:28:25She's not the kind to be crying and crying.
00:28:27But she cries very easily.
00:28:29And I don't know genetically.
00:28:31I guess I got that.
00:28:33The way I really feel.
00:28:35About my situation.
00:28:37You kill a person.
00:28:39A complex.
00:28:41Chances are.
00:28:43You're going to get the electric chair.
00:28:45Now as you look to your right.
00:28:47You see five more officers.
00:28:49Coming at you.
00:28:51As you hold that gun in your hand.
00:28:53And you look.
00:28:55What's to stop you from blowing them away.
00:28:57Every single one.
00:28:59All five of them.
00:29:01And killing those five.
00:29:03And killing another 50.
00:29:05That walk through the left door.
00:29:07That's basically it.
00:29:09I got nothing to lose.
00:29:11I'm going to die.
00:29:13I was never going to plan on killing Bjork.
00:29:15The reason why I'm so accelerated.
00:29:17In this project.
00:29:19And I've only been on it for.
00:29:21What is it? The 20? Today?
00:29:23Like what? 15 days.
00:29:25And I've already got everything designed.
00:29:27Because this wasn't going to be a death project.
00:29:29I don't plan on killing her.
00:29:31I'm in love with her.
00:29:37The reason I'm going to destroy her.
00:29:39Is not because of fucking.
00:29:41I got nothing else to lose.
00:29:43That's what love is.
00:29:45And the emotions that I have for her.
00:29:47She was the last thing.
00:29:49Besides my mother.
00:29:51That was grounding me.
00:29:53To this earth.
00:29:55The chain that was shackled to my leg.
00:29:57That was grounding me.
00:29:59From just blowing myself away.
00:30:01And blowing a whole bunch of niggers.
00:30:03Or something away.
00:30:05That I fantasized about many times.
00:30:07The reason why I feel these things.
00:30:09Is not because of my upbringing.
00:30:11That's my own personal.
00:30:13Thinking.
00:30:15That has nothing to do with.
00:30:17My father.
00:30:19I love him very much.
00:30:21But only when I was a child.
00:30:23Was I really close to him.
00:30:25I owe it to him as well.
00:30:27You know.
00:30:29He can handle it.
00:30:31The other thing that was grounding me.
00:30:33To this world.
00:30:35Was Bjork.
00:30:37Many people would say.
00:30:39What the hell are you talking about?
00:30:41You can't possibly love somebody.
00:30:43Love is something with time.
00:30:45You know what love is?
00:30:47Love is a chemical.
00:30:49A biological substance.
00:30:51In our brain which is released.
00:30:53It's a chemical called oxytocin.
00:30:55That's true love.
00:30:57Oxytocin.
00:30:59And what is oxytocin?
00:31:01It's the binding loop.
00:31:03That holds families together.
00:31:05That's.
00:31:07It's not a mystical thing.
00:31:09It's not a magical thing.
00:31:11That just happens because of.
00:31:13The soul.
00:31:15The spirit.
00:31:17It's a chemical.
00:31:19Or a machine.
00:31:21We're superior to other creatures.
00:31:23We're beyond our soul.
00:31:25Spirit.
00:31:27Mystical.
00:31:29We're so far beyond.
00:31:31We're machines.
00:31:33Biological ones.
00:31:35Machines.
00:31:37As you all well know.
00:31:39Have moving parts.
00:31:41This and that.
00:31:43Oils.
00:31:45Fuels.
00:31:47That's what we are.
00:31:49That's what I am. It's an attachment.
00:31:53This thing.
00:31:55That nigger.
00:31:57That was a stab in the heart for me.
00:31:59I see them as animals.
00:32:01Even though I am an animal.
00:32:03Personally.
00:32:05I don't see them as animals.
00:32:07Let me tell you a little bit about what I feel.
00:32:09Most people.
00:32:11First of all I'm an exterminator.
00:32:13To have a point of reference.
00:32:15I am an exterminator.
00:32:17Many people choose to refer to me.
00:32:19Cockroach man.
00:32:21Most people.
00:32:23In this world I'd say the majority.
00:32:25Are cockroaches.
00:32:27Me.
00:32:29Being one of them.
00:32:31If you look around you I'm a piece of shit.
00:32:33Dirty, sloppy, fat.
00:32:35Disgusting.
00:32:37I'm a piece of shit.
00:32:39The reason why I'm not interested in finding a girlfriend.
00:32:41Because I'm a piece of shit.
00:32:43Not that I don't have self confidence.
00:32:45Just like most people.
00:32:47But niggers.
00:32:49Niggers are the shit of cockroaches.
00:32:51My eyes.
00:32:53I mean that's ignorance.
00:32:55At it's finest.
00:32:57But it's how I feel.
00:32:59Exactly how I feel.
00:33:01And when I see a white woman.
00:33:03With a black man.
00:33:05What I feel in here.
00:33:07Is what I feel.
00:33:09Anything you mix with a nigger.
00:33:11Is an improvement.
00:33:13And it's an improvement.
00:33:15You mix them with anything.
00:33:17That's a fucking improvement.
00:33:19Not all of them are bad.
00:33:21There's a lot of good ones.
00:33:23These hard working people.
00:33:25That do not mess with you.
00:33:27And that's fine.
00:33:29Keep to themselves.
00:33:31I don't want nothing to do with them.
00:33:33You keep to yourself.
00:33:35You work hard.
00:33:37That's fine.
00:33:39But these fucking delinquents out there.
00:33:41I figure I'm already full of bullets.
00:33:43But.
00:33:45By some miracle.
00:33:47I've got another hour to live.
00:33:49And I'm fucking full of any weapons I can carry.
00:33:51I'm going to die fighting.
00:33:53But you're going to pick all you motherfuckers with.
00:33:55You can't fucking use gas.
00:33:57Or pick grenades.
00:33:59I use it.
00:34:01I have access to many new potentially catastrophic chemicals.
00:34:03And that's my advantage.
00:34:05Because anybody can have guns.
00:34:07Or chemicals.
00:34:09American people have access.
00:34:11And have the knowledge to use them.
00:34:13And I do.
00:34:19I don't know if she's been with other guys before.
00:34:21You think I like that? No.
00:34:23But what the hell am I going to do?
00:34:25There's not many times I try to figure out.
00:34:27Sex is not that big of a deal.
00:34:29Sex is a big deal to me.
00:34:31I'm a virgin. I've never had sex.
00:34:33I've seen sex. I've got tons of footage of sex.
00:34:35But I'm a virgin.
00:34:37I've never been with a woman.
00:34:39She so casually refers to sex.
00:34:41Of course for her a dick is a dick.
00:34:43Many blacks and whites
00:34:45are putting themselves
00:34:47the reason why
00:34:49whites are so afraid of
00:34:51blacks taking their women
00:34:53is because
00:34:55once you try black
00:34:57you ain't going back.
00:34:59And me, having seen
00:35:01many pornographic movies
00:35:03yeah, most black men
00:35:05have big dicks.
00:35:07That's true.
00:35:09That's very true. Do I find that threatening?
00:35:11I mean, my dick
00:35:13is about that big.
00:35:15I have such an attachment
00:35:17to her.
00:35:19You're not going to kill somebody you love?
00:35:21You can't.
00:35:23If I had to do it
00:35:25by hand though
00:35:29I really don't think I could do it.
00:35:31Shooting her
00:35:33or stabbing her
00:35:35I'm not
00:35:37killing her because I'm so
00:35:39fucking mad.
00:35:41I'm going to fucking kill her.
00:35:43If you notice, that's not my temperament.
00:35:45With what she did
00:35:47that chain
00:35:49that was holding me to this world
00:35:51besides my mother
00:35:53this sounds horrible
00:35:55but
00:35:57this chain with my mother is because
00:35:59I feel like dead to her.
00:36:01I owe her.
00:36:03With Bjork it's
00:36:05not like that.
00:36:07This link that was holding me to this
00:36:09earth
00:36:13it's gone.
00:36:15Is what I'm
00:36:17doing an act of vengeance because
00:36:19of this? I'm not
00:36:21exactly sure.
00:36:23I am going to destroy her.
00:36:25She's just human, man.
00:36:27Okay? See, I don't
00:36:29see her as human.
00:36:31Okay? I don't
00:36:33get
00:36:35I don't get this
00:36:37picture. Fuck yeah, fuck yeah.
00:36:41I put her on the pedestal
00:36:43so high.
00:36:45I was thinking about this the other day
00:36:47and it's true, we were talking about it with Bjork
00:36:49about how we have a natural tendency
00:36:51to worship.
00:36:53Since the beginning of time, civilizations have been
00:36:55worshiping either one thing or the other
00:36:57but the sun, we have that
00:36:59need in us to look up
00:37:01and to worship.
00:37:03It's put in there
00:37:05by our creator, of course.
00:37:07Now for some people it's not
00:37:09it's different things but
00:37:11everybody worships something.
00:37:13For a lot of people it's money. Oh, that's their god.
00:37:15For a lot of people it's sex
00:37:17and pleasure. That's their god.
00:37:19We're always looking for something to worship
00:37:21and apparently in my case it's her.
00:37:23A human.
00:37:26Just like me.
00:37:28An imperfect
00:37:30fleshly creature
00:37:33which I
00:37:35put her
00:37:37in an angelic status
00:37:39in my heart.
00:37:41I've never
00:37:43dreamed of fucking her.
00:37:45The only thing I've ever
00:37:47fantasized about, if anything,
00:37:49was just bringing her pleasure to
00:37:51satisfy her need.
00:37:53Eating her out or something like that.
00:37:55Just giving her an entire pleasure
00:37:57just because, you know, fulfilling her
00:37:59earthly needs.
00:38:01Not fucking her because I know that I'm not
00:38:03sufficient for that.
00:38:05I have prostate problems and I got a
00:38:07little dick and I'm fat and I have no stamina.
00:38:09If anything
00:38:11it was just that, just bringing
00:38:13her pleasure, just controlling
00:38:15her needs so that way she doesn't have to
00:38:17go out and
00:38:19get that.
00:38:21I've never really fantasized
00:38:23too much about being in a relationship
00:38:25with her because I can't be in a
00:38:27relationship with anybody
00:38:29because of my emotional
00:38:31condition.
00:38:33A lot has to do with her childlike
00:38:35looks and her childlike
00:38:37voice
00:38:39and being
00:38:41so spontaneous and cute.
00:38:43I never really
00:38:45saw her, as far as her beauty, I never really
00:38:47saw her as elegant.
00:38:49She's really cute
00:38:51and smiling
00:38:53and the way I see her,
00:38:55like a daughter type of figure.
00:38:59The most I've ever wanted to do with her
00:39:01is just hold her.
00:39:05I've had many fantasies of just
00:39:07holding her. Not being in a relationship
00:39:09with her because I'm not good for that
00:39:11but just...
00:39:13I mean...
00:39:15I've mastered
00:39:17the art of self and
00:39:19embracement.
00:39:21Her holding me
00:39:23so that I'll be
00:39:25alright.
00:39:27Feeling her lungs
00:39:29and taking the breath
00:39:31of life.
00:39:33It's quite a feeling.
00:39:37And that feeling,
00:39:39what I just felt right now
00:39:41was a rush.
00:39:43I just felt a rush.
00:39:45I mean, it's kind of silly
00:39:47but it makes sense.
00:39:49We have to fill the earth
00:39:51to bring males and females together
00:39:53because we are so different.
00:39:55There's an attraction
00:39:57when you look at the person
00:39:59and you just want to hold them in your arms
00:40:01just hold them in your arms
00:40:03forever.
00:40:05Be there together.
00:40:07Have a companion
00:40:09through this world.
00:40:11Just me and her.
00:40:13The reason why there's that magnetism
00:40:15is to procreate.
00:40:17Animals have that
00:40:19at a different type of context.
00:40:21But they have the same
00:40:23thing.
00:40:25It's actually beautiful but it's very simple.
00:40:27The reason why we have love
00:40:29is to procreate.
00:40:33God wanted us to be happy.
00:40:35Now for anybody to tell me
00:40:37that this is not love
00:40:39they're the ones who are
00:40:41just want to hold you.
00:40:45But I realize
00:40:47I'm never going to do that.
00:40:49Let me take a break.
00:40:57I wanted to
00:40:59make her think
00:41:01about me.
00:41:03I'm going to let you in on my
00:41:05fantasy that I've had.
00:41:07My fantasy is going back in time
00:41:09before Bjork got all
00:41:11fucked up
00:41:13with her lifestyle and this and that.
00:41:15The year that pops in my head
00:41:17you know
00:41:19is 77.
00:41:21Whether she was
00:41:23fucked up by it or not
00:41:25she was 11 you know
00:41:27and she was brought up in a strange
00:41:29non-orthodox
00:41:31household I guess.
00:41:33My fantasy is this
00:41:35me going back to 1977
00:41:37I become the single
00:41:39most important person in Iceland
00:41:41for that fact.
00:41:43Maybe a traveler from the future
00:41:45that comes with news from the future
00:41:47and my whole purpose is to go back in time
00:41:49and change her.
00:41:53I think I've gotten
00:41:55too comfortable with it.
00:41:59I'm going to have to call it a day.
00:42:01I've talked enough
00:42:03today as it is.
00:42:05What the hell? You're my mirror.
00:42:07You know
00:42:09that's what it is. It doesn't matter
00:42:11what I say
00:42:13even though this becomes permanent.
00:42:15It's a drawer basically. You're my mirror.
00:42:17I feel better.
00:42:19I feel better.
00:42:21I do.
00:42:25Okay I'm not going to waste any more
00:42:27tape.
00:42:29I'm back.
00:42:31It's Sunday afternoon.
00:42:33Do you see this?
00:42:37I just bought it.
00:42:39When he asked me for my telephone number
00:42:41I wasn't expecting that.
00:42:43I didn't give him my telephone number.
00:42:45I gave him my old telephone number.
00:42:47He put it on the computer and said,
00:42:49is this you?
00:42:51I didn't even read it.
00:42:53I don't want it on the record that I bought this.
00:42:55This is a long shot.
00:42:57The FBI can search
00:42:59all major department stores
00:43:01for records of clientele and customers
00:43:03and if my name pops up
00:43:05and they have everything on record
00:43:07they know I got a power tool
00:43:09or one of these hobby tools
00:43:11that's automatic.
00:43:13We know
00:43:15to make this you have to
00:43:17have some sort of power tool
00:43:19because of the holes that I'm going to do and all that.
00:43:21This sort of thing
00:43:23is going to help
00:43:25my project.
00:43:27Okay.
00:43:31Okay.
00:43:33I am really
00:43:35pissed off.
00:43:37I thought that you could read this
00:43:39but this is my paper.
00:43:41My brother calls
00:43:43saying that first of all he asked me
00:43:45very cleverly
00:43:47he asked me, hey when you went to go to
00:43:49Tokyo Bowl, how many riches did you find?
00:43:51I mean not millions of them.
00:43:53It wasn't super super impressive
00:43:55but I did find a whole bunch
00:43:57and I killed tons of them.
00:43:59He only called and he says
00:44:01that you didn't do a good job
00:44:03and that he doesn't like you
00:44:05and this and that.
00:44:07He didn't say that he didn't like me but he said he liked the other guy better.
00:44:09I said wait a second.
00:44:11George himself, he stuck by me because he knows
00:44:13I do good ass fucking work but I fucking hit
00:44:15roaches and I fucking destroyed them.
00:44:17And this motherfucker
00:44:19this fucking Chinese motherfucker
00:44:21Japanese motherfucker, whatever he is
00:44:23that's a fucking
00:44:25insult to me. I'm fucking
00:44:27offended bro. I'm going to go there tomorrow.
00:44:29I have to go there. Fucking where the hell is it?
00:44:31Commercial Boulevard. I have to go where the fuck over there
00:44:33again for free. That's fine.
00:44:35Did I just get beeped again?
00:44:37If I go there and I see
00:44:39number one, when you do a clean up
00:44:41major major clean up. I spent like over 300
00:44:43you saw how I came back and they all
00:44:45fucked up. When you do a
00:44:47fucking major clean up
00:44:49you do not get rid of 100% of the
00:44:51roaches. I mean that's practically impossible.
00:44:53Only in certain
00:44:55cases would that ever happen.
00:44:57And even then it takes
00:44:59time. I just did that clean up Friday
00:45:01and he's complaining. He says no there's not a lot of roaches
00:45:03but he's not satisfied.
00:45:05He's not fucking satisfied. Tomorrow I'm going
00:45:07to go over there. Fucking 630
00:45:09sharp. I'm going to go over there.
00:45:11I have the fucking key in there. I'm going to go
00:45:13over there. If I don't see one fucking
00:45:15if I see lots of roaches
00:45:17then I say okay
00:45:19I must have missed the nest. I must have done something wrong.
00:45:21I'm going to take care of the problem
00:45:23because I like to do good work
00:45:25especially fucking killing. I like to
00:45:27do good work and I'm fucking insulted
00:45:29at the fact that he says that I'm no good.
00:45:31If I don't see one fucking roach
00:45:33then I'm going to make that fucking place
00:45:35into a hurricane disaster. I'm going to
00:45:37he says okay
00:45:39I'm going to fucking turn all the benches and refrigerators
00:45:41and everything fucking upside down
00:45:43motherfucker. I'm going to turn that place
00:45:45inside out and I want him to fucking
00:45:47call and say and complain. I want him to do that
00:45:49because I say George
00:45:51I feel like calling the guy up tomorrow
00:45:53if I don't find one fucking roach and send him to his
00:45:55fucking Chinese ass for fucking hell.
00:45:57That wouldn't be a wise thing to do
00:45:59because I don't want to get fired over some shit
00:46:01like that because that wouldn't be true.
00:46:03I'm going to let my actions
00:46:05speak louder than my fucking words.
00:46:09Anger is truly a waste
00:46:11of energy.
00:46:13I've just been unleashing
00:46:15because I don't want to waste any more tape.
00:46:17I've been unleashing in that mirror
00:46:19angry, angry
00:46:21since I last spoke.
00:46:23It's a waste of energy, truly
00:46:25because you get nothing out of it, nothing accomplished.
00:46:27I'm still angry now but I'm going to take a shower now
00:46:29and forget this whole thing until tomorrow.
00:46:33You know.
00:46:39People have to respect what the exterminator
00:46:41can do. Yeah, yeah. Laugh.
00:46:43Yeah. The bug man.
00:46:45Although here comes the bug man.
00:46:47Hey, Mr. Cockroach.
00:46:49Laugh it up, laugh it up.
00:46:51But they have no idea
00:46:53the kind of chemicals
00:46:55that we have access to.
00:46:57Chemical,
00:46:59biological, you name it.
00:47:01Well, tomorrow I'm going to get the
00:47:03I brought in the
00:47:05MSDS sheets
00:47:07for all the chemicals that we have
00:47:09but unfortunately we're missing
00:47:11the most powerful chemical that we have.
00:47:13A chemical called Mapona.
00:47:15A taste to a teaspoon
00:47:17will kill
00:47:19any man.
00:47:21So people have to respect that
00:47:23but they don't, they don't.
00:47:25Until someday somebody does something
00:47:27and whoa, watch out with the bug man.
00:47:29They can take lives easily.
00:47:31Easily.
00:47:33Okay.
00:47:35I gotta focus all this interview
00:47:37to more productive
00:47:39uses.
00:47:41Like this project.
00:47:43I'll tell you one thing.
00:47:45If for any reason
00:47:47I lose my job
00:47:49I'm not going to get another job.
00:47:51All that's going to do is just speed up my
00:47:53my plans.
00:47:55Remember I said time is my best
00:47:57asset.
00:47:59I'm not going to get another job.
00:48:01I'm not going to get another job.
00:48:03Remember I said time is my best ally.
00:48:05If I, if and when I lose my job
00:48:07I don't have any more job.
00:48:09I got about close to
00:48:11$4,000 in the bank.
00:48:13And my supplies will run
00:48:15out soon enough. I'll just dedicate
00:48:17full time to this.
00:48:19And
00:48:21my life will end very soon.
00:48:23It's interesting.
00:48:25If one day the FBI ever
00:48:27come knocking on that door
00:48:29I will have
00:48:31three options.
00:48:33Chemical, biological
00:48:35and conventional warfare
00:48:37slash
00:48:39guerrilla tactics.
00:48:41Another
00:48:43tape is about to end.
00:48:47The more and more I speak
00:48:49the more and more
00:48:51I realize. When I mail this
00:48:53there's gotta be absolutely
00:48:55absolutely no holds barred.
00:48:57I know there's no
00:48:59return. Past the point
00:49:01of no return.
00:49:05That's it right there.
00:49:07Vapona emulsifiable
00:49:09insecticide 2.
00:49:11This
00:49:13shit is the strongest, most effective
00:49:15chemical
00:49:17that we have. Every time
00:49:19I see something about Bjork or hear something
00:49:21about Bjork
00:49:23chances are it's more upsetting
00:49:25than enlightening.
00:49:27I mean, what the fuck?
00:49:29What the hell?
00:49:31More correlation
00:49:33with her and niggas.
00:49:35It's so fucked up.
00:49:37She's fucked up, bro.
00:49:39Real fucked up.
00:49:41It's funny coming from me.
00:49:43You know what I'm saying?
00:49:45A lot has happened.
00:49:47One month exactly, just about
00:49:49a couple of weeks back, something
00:49:51very important happened.
00:49:53I got a call from my mom.
00:49:55Very, very worried
00:49:57about me and stuff like that.
00:49:59And my dad. She wanted me to come over
00:50:01there and stuff like that. I don't know
00:50:03what she knows about me.
00:50:05As far as
00:50:07what's going on.
00:50:09I don't know.
00:50:11What she knows about me.
00:50:13As far as my present condition.
00:50:15She did speak with George before.
00:50:17He only has a glimpse
00:50:19of what really is going on.
00:50:21Or what's going on.
00:50:23Asking me if I want to move over there.
00:50:25It's no problem.
00:50:27My dad,
00:50:29he was the first one who talked to me.
00:50:31He goes, look, we need you over here.
00:50:33They're under the impression that I'm having a hard time over here.
00:50:35But I'm not really.
00:50:37As far as financially, I'm doing okay.
00:50:39But it was just very moving.
00:50:41That whole week, I couldn't
00:50:43sleep.
00:50:45I had to start taking sleeping pills and stuff.
00:50:47Not to think about it, because I felt guilty as hell.
00:50:49Guilty as hell.
00:50:51He goes, are you sure you don't have any weapons
00:50:53with you?
00:50:55I said, no, mom. He goes, are you sure?
00:50:57I said, yeah, yeah, don't worry about it.
00:50:59About Bjork.
00:51:03I started thinking that week,
00:51:05especially.
00:51:07She's not worth
00:51:09the trouble.
00:51:11I put it more into
00:51:13perspective.
00:51:15As far as my plans
00:51:17that I had with her.
00:51:19It has been temporarily postponed.
00:51:21Let me show you
00:51:23something.
00:51:25I received this about three weeks ago.
00:51:27This is from her fan club.
00:51:29This is the first recognition
00:51:31of my name.
00:51:33Ricardo Lopez.
00:51:35I mean, a sweet number.
00:51:37I also received,
00:51:39if you can see,
00:51:43there's a real nice picture in here.
00:51:45Wow, it looks fucking cool as hell.
00:51:55The first time
00:51:57I read an article,
00:51:59you know, a whole interview
00:52:01without me getting
00:52:03distressed.
00:52:05I'm getting ready to leave.
00:52:07I'm gonna be going
00:52:09Saturday.
00:52:11This is the gift that I got
00:52:13from my mom and dad.
00:52:17I gotta get ready.
00:52:19Today's Monday.
00:52:21I gotta do a lot of work this week.
00:52:23That way I can
00:52:25make some money before I leave.
00:52:29What do you call it?
00:52:31I don't have that much clothes to take.
00:52:33Well, I got some
00:52:35shirts there.
00:52:37I got some stuff.
00:52:39I can take, like, three pants,
00:52:41a shirt.
00:52:43Yeah, I got stuff.
00:52:45I gotta bleach these underwears up because
00:52:47they got all greenish.
00:52:49I gotta put them to wash.
00:52:51As far as my project,
00:52:53I've already abandoned
00:52:55the idea of killing her.
00:52:57I don't want nothing to do
00:52:59with it.
00:53:01I guess that was just a stage or something.
00:53:03I mean, I was
00:53:05really determined to do that.
00:53:07Good thing
00:53:11heads cooled off and things prevailed.
00:53:13I no longer
00:53:15desire to destroy her
00:53:17no matter what she does.
00:53:19I didn't think I could change.
00:53:23Now, what to do with all
00:53:25the recordings I made about,
00:53:27you know, my plans, this and that?
00:53:29I can't destroy them, but
00:53:31it is a liability to have those
00:53:33because one day, or for whatever
00:53:35reason, somebody sees them,
00:53:37I'm fucked.
00:53:39I'm fucked.
00:53:41Let me see what time the flight takes off.
00:53:43I'm actually
00:53:45pretty excited to be flying again.
00:53:47You know, besides
00:53:49I'm gonna see my family,
00:53:51be with them, this and that.
00:53:53Boom, boom, boom.
00:53:55All my other stuff that's over there.
00:53:57You know, I'm not gonna bring my
00:53:59easel. I can't really bring that.
00:54:01My books
00:54:03and all the miscellaneous
00:54:05art supplies and such.
00:54:07Yeah.
00:54:19I'm happy.
00:54:21I'm happy because I'm over the moon.
00:54:25I'm happy.
00:54:27I'm happy.
00:54:29I'm happy.
00:54:31I'm happy.
00:54:33I'm happy.
00:54:35I'm happy.
00:54:37I'm happy.
00:54:39I'm happy.
00:54:41I'm happy.
00:54:43I'm happy.
00:54:45I'm happy.
00:54:47I'm happy.
00:54:49I'm happy.
00:54:51I'm happy.
00:54:53I'm happy.
00:54:55I'm happy.
00:54:57I'm happy.
00:54:59I'm happy.
00:55:01I'm happy.
00:55:03I'm happy.
00:55:05I'm happy.
00:55:07I'm happy.
00:55:09I'm happy.
00:55:11I'm happy.
00:55:13I quit my job.
00:55:15Right now,
00:55:17as we speak,
00:55:19I am unemployed.
00:55:21I figure,
00:55:23if I spend about $2 a day
00:55:25on food,
00:55:27the television,
00:55:29no cable.
00:55:31That's been disconnected.
00:55:33The telephone, I owe them like $200.
00:55:35That as well is going to get disconnected.
00:55:37Right now, I'm living my fantasy
00:55:39in a way.
00:55:41I'm not scared.
00:55:43I'm very involved in what I'm doing.
00:55:45I'm going to do it.
00:55:47This little lady here needs no introduction.
00:55:49This AIDS thing,
00:55:51I'm afraid I'm not going to be able to do that.
00:55:53I'm 85%
00:55:57using hydrochloric acid.
00:55:59I'm going to get
00:56:01the hydrochloric acid.
00:56:03I got
00:56:05Ralph's truck.
00:56:07I did a lot of shopping today.
00:56:09I went all over the place.
00:56:11I spent about $120.
00:56:13I bought a whole bunch of supplies.
00:56:15The air
00:56:17supply.
00:56:19Right now, I'm a little nervous.
00:56:21I got to play smooth.
00:56:23I'm an artist
00:56:25who wants to buy hydrochloric acid
00:56:27for his metal work
00:56:29to create some interesting textures
00:56:31in his work.
00:56:33My name is Ricardo Lopez.
00:56:35Just in case you asked for my ID.
00:56:41Six pounds.
00:56:47Okay.
00:56:49This is 36%
00:56:51hydrochloric acid.
00:56:53I of course
00:56:55wanted 100%.
00:56:57I am going to call to find out if I can get
00:56:59something stronger because
00:57:01I'm going all the way with this project.
00:57:03I'm not settling for second best.
00:57:05I want to do some experiments
00:57:07which I will be filming.
00:57:09Now, I got to get suited up.
00:57:11What do you think?
00:57:13Is it cool or is it cool?
00:57:15My first victim.
00:57:17Pizza.
00:57:19Now,
00:57:21it talks here about fumes.
00:57:23I'm a little worried about the fumes.
00:57:25If I do smell something,
00:57:27I got to get out of here.
00:57:33Saw that?
00:57:35I smell it.
00:57:45Something's
00:57:47a little wrong with the camera.
00:57:49Look at me.
00:57:51I'm sweating like a pig.
00:57:53I still hear a little bit of a crackling sound.
00:57:55I've tried it on bread.
00:57:57I've tried it on vegetable, metal.
00:57:59The only thing that I hear
00:58:01a little crackling but no fizzling
00:58:03is the copper wire.
00:58:05I'm not too happy with it.
00:58:07Now,
00:58:09for the surprise of the day.
00:58:11Sulfuric
00:58:13acid.
00:58:15That's right.
00:58:17I got one pint of sulfuric acid.
00:58:19It's danger.
00:58:21Corrosive liquid
00:58:23to the bones,
00:58:25to all body tissue.
00:58:27Let me show you something.
00:58:29This is what Bjork
00:58:31is going to have to deal with.
00:58:37You were out of shot there.
00:58:39But,
00:58:41if you notice how I put
00:58:43the spring system.
00:58:45Very simple.
00:58:47This is not the actual air can.
00:58:49This is empty of course.
00:58:51I have to make sure
00:58:53everything works okay with this.
00:58:55The trial will begin
00:58:57as soon as I get my
00:58:59other air can.
00:59:01I'm about to sacrifice
00:59:03the salami.
00:59:07I'm working with the sulfuric acid
00:59:09right now.
00:59:11I'm going to experiment and see how it works.
00:59:13It bubbled up when I put water in it.
00:59:15That was cool.
00:59:17You see that?
00:59:19That's the after.
00:59:23This is the
00:59:25sulfuric acid.
00:59:2796%.
00:59:29I'm about to go shopping for guns.
00:59:31There's a place right here.
00:59:33Hollywood Boulevard. Perfect place.
00:59:39A date
00:59:41that will live in infamy.
00:59:43I told them that
00:59:45I wanted it for a home defense
00:59:47because somebody tried to break in here
00:59:49or something and I got scared.
00:59:51Very good.
00:59:53I accomplished a lot.
00:59:57I'm going to get the ammo too.
01:00:01This is what it's all about man.
01:00:03I'm enjoying my last meal.
01:00:05I'm going for the bathroom.
01:00:09Hello? You see me?
01:00:19Tourists.
01:00:31Hollow points.
01:00:33This shreds into pieces
01:00:35once it enters somebody's skull.
01:00:37It does fragmentation.
01:00:39It does much more damage.
01:00:41Push fire.
01:00:43Cock back.
01:00:45Back to shooting.
01:00:53This is Bjork.
01:00:55This is what happens to Bjork when she fucks with people.
01:01:03I'd say that was a direct hit.
01:01:11I got a lot of clean up work to do now.
01:01:13I'm like
01:01:15forget that.
01:01:17All over her face.
01:01:19Especially all over here.
01:01:21Wow.
01:01:23Fucking beautiful.
01:01:27Ricardo Lopez has an appointment
01:01:29on Monday
01:01:318-12-96
01:01:33with Pam
01:01:35P-A-M
01:01:39Henderson Mental Health Center.
01:01:43Yes my friend.
01:01:45Saturday around 1.30
01:01:47I get a knock on the door.
01:01:49I open and it's Carlos.
01:01:51I'm like oh fuck.
01:01:53The first thing I do is I get my gun
01:01:55that was right there.
01:01:57I put it in my drawer.
01:01:59He sits down.
01:02:01We start talking.
01:02:03I came over here
01:02:05because
01:02:07we're very worried about you or something.
01:02:09He starts crying and gives me a hug.
01:02:11I started crying too.
01:02:13He said he loves you very much.
01:02:15Yeah I love you too.
01:02:17I'm like no I'm okay.
01:02:19I had no idea how big this was going to be.
01:02:21Very exciting man.
01:02:23This is the last couple of weeks
01:02:25of my life.
01:02:27It doesn't seem like it.
01:02:29Not that I'm having second thoughts or anything.
01:02:31I don't know.
01:02:33I was supposed to call a doctor but I didn't call him.
01:02:35I didn't feel like getting up.
01:02:37It was too sleepy.
01:02:39What is the number one prime directive?
01:02:41Number one is to end my life.
01:02:43That's the number one prime directive.
01:02:45Number two
01:02:47to get this
01:02:49into her hands
01:02:51and for it to blow up.
01:02:53Scenario number one.
01:02:55I go the safe route
01:02:57Federal Express coming over here
01:02:59picking up
01:03:01the package
01:03:03and they're blowing my house.
01:03:07I'm going to fuck you up Bjork.
01:03:13I feel like I'm on drugs.
01:03:15He's going to get
01:03:19As long as I got the gun
01:03:21in my shed bro I'm going to secure it.
01:03:23One major thing
01:03:25that will screw me up is this motherfucker
01:03:27downstairs the fucking manager
01:03:29coming to talk to me about
01:03:31me not having paid the rent.
01:03:33If he tries to kick me out or something
01:03:35I'll just burn down his office or something
01:03:37and just fuck him up.
01:03:39I'm headed for greatness not in the eyes of man
01:03:41but in my eyes.
01:03:43That was dignity god damn it.
01:03:45See this is the problem
01:03:47with having kids.
01:03:49You raise them the best you can this and that
01:03:51and they can end up all screwed up like me.
01:03:53That could be a lot worse
01:03:55but nonetheless I'm going to bring
01:03:57my parents and my family a lot of pain
01:03:59a lot of shame but I was not asked to.
01:04:01None of us are asked to be brought into this world.
01:04:03It is a crime.
01:04:05It is a fucking crime
01:04:07to bring children into this world
01:04:09and you shall pay for it.
01:04:11We live in a world of monsters.
01:04:13Do you understand that? A world of monsters.
01:04:15It belongs to them.
01:04:17And I assume
01:04:19I'm in my robes of becoming Whitman.
01:04:21I'm going to die with the monsters
01:04:23I'm going to die as a monster.
01:04:25I'm not going to die an innocent man.
01:04:33Okay new take.
01:04:35As I was saying
01:04:37I'm about to put the sulfuric acid
01:04:39inside.
01:04:41I did one major major
01:04:43major thing today was that
01:04:45I told Ralph I was going to
01:04:47I couldn't resist.
01:04:49I showed him my
01:04:51envelope and the letter and I told him that I'm
01:04:53sending him a package.
01:04:55I told him it was not a bomb
01:04:57I told him it was an artwork but I'm going to be
01:04:59sending her to hell.
01:05:01Of course I shouldn't have told him
01:05:03for the above reason
01:05:05I shouldn't trust him at all because
01:05:07he's told me before.
01:05:09It'll be very interesting.
01:05:13I was going to put a
01:05:15plastic bag on it
01:05:17because of the smell
01:05:19I don't think I need to anymore.
01:05:21On my suicide tape
01:05:23will be a
01:05:25photograph
01:05:39I better get fucking ready.
01:05:41This is a life and death matter right here.
01:05:43If I don't make it back that means something
01:05:45happened.
01:05:47I'm very very very nervous.
01:05:49I don't think I've ever been
01:05:51this nervous.
01:05:53I took two
01:05:55rides.
01:05:57I will walk over there.
01:05:59I have my handgun
01:06:01loaded in my
01:06:03sack here.
01:06:07If I don't return
01:06:09I just want to say goodbye to everybody.
01:06:13I'm certainly not going to get arrested
01:06:15I'm going to blow my head off.
01:06:17I can't be suspicious.
01:06:19The thing that scares me half to death
01:06:21is when you shake it
01:06:23you hear like bubbles.
01:06:25I better hurry up and go now.
01:06:27I'm going to go now.
01:06:37I was shaking more and more but
01:06:39I was real cool in there.
01:06:41I was just a little bit nervous but
01:06:43at least
01:06:45at least
01:06:47I gave it 100%
01:06:49of the effort.
01:06:51I'm not going to kill myself
01:06:53just yet. My neighbors are there.
01:06:55I did it.
01:06:57It's hard to believe.
01:06:59The effort's what counts.
01:07:01Fact that
01:07:03how much tape do I have here?
01:07:07Am I going to eat one more time?
01:07:09No I don't think so.
01:07:11Maybe noontime is when
01:07:13I'll blow my head off.
01:07:15Might as well get it over with today
01:07:17because what's the use now?
01:07:21It's a little weird feeling
01:07:23finally doing what you accomplished.
01:07:25Will this be
01:07:27the suicide tape?
01:07:31Yeah this should be the suicide tape.
01:07:41I don't know.
01:07:43I don't know.
01:07:45I don't know.
01:07:47I don't know.
01:07:49I don't know.
01:07:51I don't know.
01:07:53I don't know.
01:07:55I don't know.
01:07:57I don't know.
01:07:59I don't know.
01:08:01I don't know.
01:08:03I don't know.
01:08:05I don't know.
01:08:07I don't know.
01:08:09I don't know.
01:08:11I don't know.
01:08:13I don't know.
01:08:15I don't know.
01:08:17I don't know.
01:08:19I don't know.
01:08:21I don't know.
01:08:23I don't know.
01:08:25I don't know.
01:08:27I don't know.
01:08:29I don't know.
01:08:31I don't know.
01:08:33I don't know.
01:08:35I don't know.
01:08:37I don't know.
01:08:39I don't know.
01:08:41I don't know.
01:08:43I don't know.
01:08:45I don't know.
01:08:47I don't know.
01:08:49I don't know.
01:08:51I don't know.
01:08:53I don't know.
01:08:55I don't know.
01:08:57I don't know.
01:08:59I don't know.
01:09:01I don't know.
01:09:03I don't know.
01:09:05I don't know.
01:09:07I don't know.
01:09:09I don't know.
01:09:11I don't know.
01:09:13I don't know.
01:09:15I don't know.
01:09:17I don't know.
01:09:19I don't know.
01:09:21I don't know.
01:09:23I don't know.
01:09:25I don't know.
01:09:27I don't know.
01:09:29I don't know.
01:09:31I don't know.
01:09:33I don't know.
01:09:53I don't know.
01:09:55I don't know.
01:09:57I don't know.
01:10:03I remember you.
01:10:09You're the one
01:10:11that said
01:10:13I love you too.
01:10:19Didn't you know?
01:10:27I remember too
01:10:29a distant bell
01:10:35and stars that fell
01:10:39like rain
01:10:41out of the blue.
01:10:51When my life is through
01:10:53and the angels
01:10:55ask me
01:10:57to recall
01:11:01the thrill
01:11:03of them all
01:11:07I shall
01:11:09tell them
01:11:11I remember
01:11:17you.
01:11:23You.
01:11:25You.
01:11:27You.
01:11:31I remember
01:11:33you.
01:11:37You're the one
01:11:39that made my dreams
01:11:41come true
01:11:45a few kisses
01:11:47ago.
01:11:53I remember
01:11:55you.
01:12:01You're the one
01:12:03that said
01:12:05I love you too.
01:12:09Didn't you know?
01:12:17I remember
01:12:19too
01:12:21a distant bell
01:12:25and stars
01:12:27that fell
01:12:29like rain
01:12:33out of the blue.
01:12:41When my life
01:12:43is through
01:12:47and the angels
01:12:49ask me
01:12:51to recall
01:12:57the thrill
01:12:59of them all
01:13:05I shall tell them
01:13:09I remember
01:13:15you.
01:13:19You.
01:13:21You.
01:13:23You.
01:13:25You.
01:13:27You.
01:13:33Tixier!
01:13:35Ow.
01:13:49We had seen on the videotape
01:13:51that he actually packaged it
01:13:57mailed it and we knew from the videotape
01:13:59the address to which he had mailed it.
01:14:01We then contacted
01:14:03the post office in South London
01:14:05and then they were able to detonate it
01:14:07without incident.
01:14:13I just find it very sad
01:14:15that we can forget that fun statement.
01:14:21I'm very upset.
01:14:23Are you going to quit?
01:14:25I was more worried about my son
01:14:27really, but he
01:14:29seems to be dealing with it in a very
01:14:31manner.
01:14:35How have you been?
01:14:37Well, you know,
01:14:39it's just kind of like surfing, you know
01:14:41obviously when somebody shoots their face off
01:14:43it's terrible.
01:14:45I'm not sure if I'll dream of it
01:14:47properly.
01:15:01You.
01:15:03You.
01:15:05You.
01:15:07You.
01:15:09You.
01:15:11You.
01:15:13You.
01:15:15You.
01:15:17You.
01:15:19You.
01:15:21You.
01:15:23You.
01:15:25You.
01:15:27You.
01:15:29You.
01:15:31You.
01:15:33You.
01:15:35You.
01:15:37You.
01:15:39You.
01:15:41You.
01:15:43You.
01:15:45You.
01:15:47You.
01:15:49You.
01:15:51You.
01:15:53You.
01:15:55You.