My Big Fat Fabulous Life S12 Episode 8 - Who Let the Dogs Out
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00:00What the f**k, pal?
00:03Previously on My Big Fat Fabulous Life.
00:05Do you know what the basil is for?
00:07Emotional balance.
00:08Okay.
00:09We've got a little bit of a remodel for my dad's bedroom.
00:13As soon as my brother and I learned that my dad wanted to sell the house,
00:16we immediately tried to scheme ways to incentivize him to not do that.
00:20Yeah, I'll walk all over that.
00:22Let's do it.
00:23The solution is to reno the downstairs bedroom.
00:25As soon as possible would be great.
00:27Speaking of like celebrations and plannings and whatnot.
00:29I still do not have a single plan for my birthday.
00:31The vibe that I miss is like St. Lucia vibes.
00:34Oh, my God.
00:35Maybe intercontinental.
00:36Intercontinental?
00:37Mm-hmm.
00:38I think it's year 10 of the apps.
00:40It's time to try something different.
00:42Yeah, at least something different.
00:43I agree.
00:44I know I can't meet somebody sitting, you know, on my couch with y'all.
00:47I think I might need some outside help.
00:50We're going to do the old-timey, the old-timey wave.
00:53Like a matchmaker.
00:54Do they still have those?
00:55Do they?
00:56They have like professional ones that they have to give.
01:22Hey, goose.
01:23Hey, girl.
01:26Oh, lordy.
01:28Oh.
01:34Hi, Whitney.
01:35Hi, how are you?
01:36How are you?
01:37I'm good.
01:38I'm nervous.
01:39I did not suspect in life that I would need your services.
01:43But I've heard a lot of really good things about you.
01:46Please.
01:47It is so nice to meet you.
01:48I'm so excited for today.
01:49Let's get started.
01:50Okay.
01:51So I took my friend's advice and I actually found a matchmaker.
01:55Her name is Alessandra.
01:56She's based in Beverly Hills.
01:58And we're having our first video appointment today.
02:00And I'm counting on her.
02:01Like I really hope that I get some good insight from her and that she can help me figure out maybe what I'm doing wrong or guide me on what to do better.
02:09Because I am determined to find my husband in my fourth decade.
02:14I want to learn more about you and what's worked, what hasn't worked.
02:19And if we could back up a little bit, tell me about the last, like, three years dating life.
02:27What's been going on?
02:29So for the last three years, I was involved with a man who lived in France.
02:33We had the most wonderful time.
02:35But logistically, like, I'm not going to move to Paris and leave my dad here.
02:39And he would never move out of Paris.
02:42So even though I've been involved with this French man, I've still, like, kept my dating apps open.
02:47Nothing has ever come my way.
02:49I haven't gotten hit on in public.
02:51You know, I think I have specific challenges.
02:52Like, my size is something.
02:54The fact that I'm now almost 40, I think, is something.
02:57I just am, like, so devoid of any connection.
03:02And I just want some.
03:04It's nerve-wracking being face-to-face with Alessandra.
03:07Like, the fact that you need a matchmaker to help you find a man feels pretty vulnerable and kind of embarrassing.
03:13Even though, obviously, this is what she does all the time.
03:16I'm just really hoping that she has some solutions to facilitate finding me a good quality date.
03:23Dating is not easy.
03:25And I'm so glad you had that time with him.
03:28That was wonderful.
03:30But now that train has left the station.
03:33He was not able to give you the full commitment that you absolutely deserve.
03:39And this is why I recommend different avenues.
03:42Definitely dating apps are one avenue.
03:45I was actually working really hard on the apps for, like, the last couple weeks.
03:48I mean, messaging every single man that I matched with, complimenting people I didn't match with.
03:52I've never put that much effort into it.
03:54And I finally got one response.
03:56One.
03:57And the guy was really attractive.
03:59And I just said, hey, how are you?
04:01And he said, you're a goddess.
04:03And I said, oh, well, that's an interesting, you know, answer to, hey, how are you?
04:06But thank you.
04:07And then he said, DTF.
04:09And I said, I didn't say anything.
04:12And then he said, I'm 11 inches and thick.
04:15You know, so I feel like for me, like, I've had enough sex in life.
04:20You know what I mean?
04:21Most women don't have a problem getting sex.
04:23So I'm not, I don't care about that anymore.
04:25It's like investing, right?
04:27You're not going to invest fully in one stock and one stock only.
04:31And then it's you or die.
04:33So it's the same thing with your dating life.
04:35You want to diversify your portfolio when it comes to, you know, how you're meeting men.
04:41If a man flirted with me in public, much less like asked me out, I would fall over and die.
04:45I would be, I can't even fathom it happening.
04:47It's just like, when did I get this lame?
04:49You know, I used to be able to go out to the bars.
04:52I used to be a big drinker.
04:53And I could always find something if I wanted it.
04:56And now I'm not sure that I could.
04:58So that's, you know.
04:59I think this is a limiting mindset.
05:01I really do.
05:02And let me be honest.
05:04I don't leave the house.
05:05So there's also that.
05:06I mean, I have to be, I don't leave the house.
05:09I've definitely become a huge homebody.
05:13And that's the reason I do the apps.
05:14Because I'm like, well, I know I can't meet anybody sitting in my living room.
05:18But I don't ever leave the house.
05:20Listen to yourself.
05:23Oh my goodness.
05:26The older I've gotten, the more isolation I've imposed on myself.
05:30Of course, the pandemic didn't help.
05:32And I know Alessandra is rolling her eyes.
05:36With the way I live, the only man I would meet would be a pizza man.
05:41Somebody come fix my toilet.
05:43The exterminator.
05:45If you're not coming to me, we're not going to meet.
05:48If you're in your home 99% of the time, you're not going to meet anybody.
05:53And then you're going to only meet the men on the apps.
05:55And they're either going to be socially awkward or looking for sex.
05:59So first order of business is getting you out of the house.
06:04If you can set a goal for the next two months,
06:08I want you to go to one event of any kind.
06:14It could be a conference.
06:17It could be a dog park.
06:18Oh, that's a good idea.
06:20I never go to the dog park.
06:22Dog parks are phenomenal places.
06:24So many single men.
06:25And I have a cute dog.
06:27Amazing.
06:29But whatever it is, one event per week.
06:33Only for the next two months.
06:35Okay, I'm scared, but I like it.
06:37Okay.
06:38Okay, when you're at events, good guys, a lot of times,
06:42they have approach anxiety.
06:44And they're not doing it anymore.
06:46It's not something that's really done.
06:48So there is a strategy.
06:50It's called dropping the handkerchief.
06:52Okay.
06:53Dropping the handkerchief.
06:54What that means is ask them a random question unrelated to them.
06:59It's about whatever it is that you're there for.
07:02It doesn't have to be anything.
07:03It can be, oh, do you know what's in a matcha?
07:06Like, do you have any idea what's in a matcha?
07:08Anything.
07:09Ask any inane, random question about whatever it is,
07:12wherever it is you're at.
07:14And then the guy will answer.
07:16But because we are dropping the handkerchief,
07:18there is another step.
07:20These are the words that will open up your dating life.
07:23You say, oh, gosh, thank you.
07:25Are you from around here?
07:27Because then the guy will say, oh, yeah,
07:29I actually just moved up the street.
07:31I went through a really rough divorce.
07:32Okay, great.
07:33Oh, yeah, me and my wife just moved up the street.
07:35Oh, me and my husband moved up the street.
07:37Okay, great.
07:38Then we know.
07:39And then as you guys are chatting, you can say, oh, my gosh,
07:42you are so lovely.
07:43Here, take my number.
07:44Take my Instagram.
07:45Yeah, like reach out.
07:46But after that, they have the ball.
07:49It's in their court.
07:50They'll either reach out to you, contact you, or they won't.
07:52In dating, getting used to rejection.
07:55That is, it's a part of dating.
07:58I've been rejected.
07:59I'm used to that.
08:00I've been rejected a lot.
08:02I think rejection is kind of like a catch-22.
08:06Obviously, you're putting yourself out there because you
08:08want someone to accept you.
08:11But you have to be willing that they will reject you.
08:14And then you can't let that rejection make you not want to
08:16put yourself out there again.
08:18And unfortunately, I feel like, for me,
08:21I've definitely become very cynical.
08:23But even though it makes me really anxious,
08:25I know I have to.
08:27And if I don't have someone to be accountable to,
08:30like Alessandra, there's no way I'm ever going to do it.
08:34Homework-wise, send me over the best photos that you've had
08:38taken of yourself over the last year.
08:40If you have not had really good photos taken of yourself,
08:44book a photo shoot.
08:46You need good photos that are dating-specific.
08:51That is a challenge because, yeah, I just got my braces off.
08:54I actually lost 100 pounds from my heaviest weight.
08:57And I think I've only gotten prettier as I've gotten older.
08:59So I don't know if I have a lot of really good ones that really
09:03look like me now.
09:04So, OK, you have a little bit of homework.
09:06I have homework.
09:07Yes.
09:08I already feel hopeful, which is a good sign.
09:10And I will complete all my homework before we talk next.
09:12Amazing, Whitney.
09:13I'm so excited for you.
09:14We'll talk soon, OK?
09:15OK.
09:16Bye.
09:18Bye.
09:19Bye.
09:21Goosey girl?
09:23We're going to the dog park.
09:25I mean, the way I talk about myself, it's as though I've never had a
09:28boyfriend or something, which is far from the truth.
09:31I've had seven serious relationships.
09:33I've had two men who wanted to marry me at some point.
09:36Come on, goosey girl.
09:37I've just got to get in the right mindset.
09:39And I've got to know I will be rejected, of course.
09:43But just talking to men in person is still something good, ultimately.
09:54Hey, Dad.
09:56Hey.
09:57Well, I just had an appointment with a matchmaker,
10:01and she said I had to go to an event every week.
10:06Have you seen a lot of cute single men there?
10:08No.
10:09No?
10:10Well, most of them.
10:12Well, there's got to be a lot of guys there, right?
10:14There's more single guys that are with their girlfriends.
10:17Well, I'll come, but you have to pretend like you don't know me.
10:20All right.
10:21Because I don't think men approach when, you know,
10:24they have to also meet the father at the same time.
10:27You have to dance along with them.
10:29Right.
10:30Are you on a date with Ravi?
10:31Yeah.
10:32Where's Ravi?
10:34Tell Ravi, because Ravi said he was matchmaking me,
10:37and I haven't heard any updates on that.
10:39Is he around?
10:41Well, I'm looking for him.
10:43I'm surprised you don't keep tabs on your boyfriend.
10:45My dad's favorite place to go now is this restaurant called
10:48My dad's favorite place to go now is this restaurant,
10:51Elm Street Grill.
10:52He and the owner, Ravi, have a very special connection.
10:57And even though I want a man and, like, a family at this point,
11:01I might legitimately settle for what dad and Ravi have.
11:05Hi, Whitney.
11:06Ravi, hi!
11:08Love you, darling.
11:09I love you.
11:10Listen, real quick, I wanted to tell you.
11:11My would-be daughter-in-law.
11:12My would-be daughter-in-law.
11:14Well, see, this is the thing.
11:16I just had an appointment with a matchmaker,
11:18and you had asked me if I was open to an Indian man,
11:21and I said yes, but if you don't bring me any,
11:23then I'm going to be snatched up soon.
11:25Why not go to India, make a trip there,
11:28and come back with a husband?
11:30Well, I would need you to go with me, obviously.
11:33Absolutely.
11:34Let's make it.
11:35Okay, all right.
11:36Talk to you soon.
11:37I'll keep you updated.
11:39All right.
11:40Okay, see you soon, daddy.
11:42See you.
11:43Bye.
11:46I am determined to start getting out of my house
11:49and start meeting people in public socially,
11:52but it's literally been 10 years since I, like, went out to bars.
11:57So even though I'm determined to do it, it makes me anxious.
12:00Like, I feel like I'm about to go skydiving.
12:02I just hope that the parachute opens.
12:05Oh, Goosey.
12:07Are you hopeful?
12:09You feeling good about it?
12:11Okay, me too.
12:15Goodness, there's lots of dogs here.
12:17Jessica is so invested in my dating journey,
12:20so she agreed to come to hunt for men.
12:22Oh, oh, oh.
12:23Yeah, with the longer chair?
12:24Yeah, yeah, he's cute.
12:25I thought he was really cute.
12:26Is he looking here?
12:27Yep.
12:28Wait, we can't just stare at him.
12:29Oh, f***.
12:44Hey, Daddy.
12:54Hey.
12:55Hey.
12:56Well, something's changed on my social media.
12:58What?
12:59It looks like I'm in New Delhi.
13:03What?
13:04There's Indian people and Spanish people and...
13:08Well, there's Indian people on social media.
13:11Well, I know, but before it was a little bit.
13:14Now it's everybody.
13:17Ask Ravi about all the Indian people on your phone.
13:19That's what happened.
13:20I bet Ravi took your phone and looked up some stuff,
13:22and now it thinks that you are only interested in seeing Indian people.
13:26You know, I think you have...
13:28Unlocked the mystery.
13:29Found it, yeah.
13:30See?
13:31Want a pickle?
13:32No.
13:33Save one for your mom.
13:35A pickle?
13:36She loved pickles.
13:38Maybe that's why I love pickles so much now.
13:40The organizing is going to be done so I can go back into the house.
13:44There's a lot of work over there, Dad.
13:46No.
13:47It is.
13:48And I just don't want you to see it until it's cleaned out.
13:51I feel like it's been an eternity since Hunter and Whitney
13:54have started this garage clean-out project.
13:57I hope that it's only going to be another couple of weeks
14:00before she's going to allow me to visit my own home.
14:05I mean, I don't trust Hunter to get all my mail.
14:09I've got to be honest with you, Dad.
14:10I don't trust Hunter for a lot.
14:12Hunter is not helping me with cleaning out the garage.
14:15I'm doing it all by myself.
14:17And I have small hands.
14:19See what I mean?
14:20Seriously, that's why it's taking so long.
14:23I'm getting slightly frustrated that my dad is so adamant
14:25about getting back in the house because I need more time.
14:29And the worst thing that could happen is if he inserts himself at the house
14:34and sees the surprise before it's ready.
14:36And then it's ruined.
14:38Well, it's about time for me to go to Elm Street.
14:41I'm going to go over there and see how things are going.
14:45Why do you have a more robust social calendar than I could ever dream of?
14:49Well, I don't have...
14:50Dad, you literally do something every day of the week,
14:52and then you have your gym scheduled during the day.
14:56Well...
14:57But I did make us an appointment to go get stretched.
15:00Because we've got to get you...
15:01You know how you walk like this now?
15:04What is that, though?
15:05Is it your hip that's causing you to do that?
15:07Well, that and my knee a little bit.
15:08But both of them are really getting a whole lot better.
15:11Well, we're going to go get stretched.
15:13And Jessica is the one who recommended the place,
15:15so she'll probably come with us.
15:17Well, good.
15:18Love you.
15:19Love you.
15:24I'm looking at that IT band.
15:26It looks tight to me.
15:28Hi.
15:29Hi.
15:30How are you?
15:31How are you?
15:32I'm Nikki.
15:33Nice to meet you.
15:34Nice to meet you.
15:35I'm Whitney.
15:36You work with Mike?
15:37I do.
15:38I'm his wife.
15:39Okay, good, good, good.
15:40You're a lot prettier than he is, so it's fine.
15:41Okay, well, I guess I'll just take you in and show you what we got.
15:44Awesome.
15:45Yeah.
15:46Even though this room renovation started a couple of years ago,
15:49it's still going strong.
15:50It's still going strong.
15:51It's still going strong.
15:52It's still going strong.
15:53It's still going strong.
15:54It's still going strong.
15:55It's still going strong.
15:56This renovation started as a way to convince my dad not to sell the house.
15:59It's actually given me, like, something to look forward to
16:01and something to work on, and I'm really enjoying the process.
16:05This room, I mean, it has been through a lot.
16:07So, is this where you grew up?
16:08Yeah, a lot of my formative, like, life experiences.
16:11All my friends, we used to, actually, we used to always dance in here.
16:15This was, like, the playroom.
16:16We had a TV right there, so my friend taught me we would dance
16:19and we would use the TV as our, like, mirror.
16:21Yeah.
16:22A lot of our memories, you know, from the last 20 years are tied up in this house,
16:26and it actually just feels like a big memory box.
16:29And that room specifically, Todd and I, that was our dancing room.
16:34Our whole Fat Girl Dancing series came to fruition in that room.
16:38You can't keep breaking my heart, baby.
16:42Oh, you can't keep breaking my, breaking my, breaking my heart.
16:49I f***ing love it.
16:53Then, later on in life, I moved into that room as my bedroom.
16:58What you need, sweetie?
17:00Can you help me?
17:01Yeah, what do you need?
17:02Can you shave the back of my legs?
17:06Sure.
17:08What?
17:10What's going on?
17:11Dad, can you really not?
17:13Don't put your stuff up against me.
17:15Lie down.
17:17Like, I'm not ready to give it up.
17:19That room has held a lot of really good memories, but it has so much potential.
17:24It could be a beautiful, welcoming, wonderful, all-inclusive space for my dad,
17:30and I don't want him to shut it down before he sees what it could be.
17:35The thing is, my dad wants to sell the house.
17:37He just doesn't want to deal with it.
17:39So I really wanted to make this room a sanctuary for him
17:46so that he can see the possibilities, you know, that are here.
17:49Because he told me to come clean out the garage and do all this stuff, you know,
17:52to get the house ready to sell.
17:53So he doesn't know?
17:54No, no.
17:55But yeah, Glenthor is not allowed in the house.
17:57Okay.
17:58Okay.
17:59Let me go get the guys.
18:00Now, aren't they single?
18:01They are.
18:02Well, one's taken.
18:04How old are they?
18:05They're in their 20s.
18:06How old do you think I am?
18:0835.
18:09Oh, thank God.
18:10I'll just be 40 in a couple months.
18:12Can I really flirt with these men?
18:14Probably not.
18:15You know, I mean, there's, you know, professionalism.
18:18They're working for me.
18:19I don't want to make things complicated.
18:21So I'll look, but I won't touch.
18:24I'm Whitney.
18:25Justin.
18:26Miguel.
18:27Justin.
18:28Miguel.
18:29Nice to meet you.
18:30So this room, we're going to just be taking out the carpet, carpet padding.
18:32And then in the bathroom here, there's a different tile going in here.
18:35It's a tile look, 12 by 24.
18:38It's a dark, like, black twilight.
18:41I got you a transition here, but if it doesn't work, let me know,
18:45and we'll get a transition for you guys to make.
18:48The flooring guys are cute, but they are very, very young.
18:53Yeah, I just feel I've abandoned all self-respect.
18:59I got to keep it right.
19:00I'll just say that.
19:01I got to keep it right.
19:02Okay, well, I'll leave you all to it.
19:04Good luck.
19:05I don't know where single men my age are,
19:07but if I'm going to go looking for men,
19:09I don't think it's going to be on a construction site, and that's for sure.
19:13Oh, and let them know about Dad.
19:15Okay.
19:16Okay?
19:17All right.
19:18Her father is not allowed to pee.
19:19Sounds good, Whitney.
19:20Bye.
19:21All right.
19:22I'm just saying, I am on the cusp of my 40th year, and I am not a virgin.
19:27Dad, you said.
19:28I don't want to hear any more of this conversation.
19:30Before you dated Mom, you had sowed your seeds.
19:32I didn't say that.
19:33They sowed the seed.
19:34Well, Angie would tell us differently, Dad.
19:55You're welcome.
19:56Hey, how's it going?
19:59It's Whitney, Glenn, Jessica, and Isaiah.
20:01I'm Nick.
20:02I'm going to be helping you with your stretch.
20:03Welcome in.
20:04Nice to meet you.
20:05You having a good day?
20:06I'm hoping it's going to get better.
20:07It's going to get a lot better after the stretch.
20:09Come on back.
20:10Okay?
20:11Awesome.
20:12We're going to be heading over to this table right here today.
20:14Grayson.
20:15Nice to meet you, Grayson.
20:16Nice to meet you.
20:17Jessica trains my dad at the gym, and his strength has really been improving,
20:20but his mobility and his flexibility are still not all that great,
20:25and he's still so sharp.
20:27He's still so active, and I don't want his body to hold him back,
20:30so Jessica and I are going to a professional stretcher
20:34so that we can work on my dad's flexibility.
20:37What is it that makes him walk like that?
20:40Hips.
20:41That's the hips.
20:42That's what I thought.
20:43I don't walk like a duck.
20:44Sometimes you have a little bit of a waddle.
20:46A little bit of a waddle.
20:48It's a little bit, and I didn't say it.
20:50Lay down here.
20:52This is crazy.
20:53There's a lot going on.
20:55Oh, yeah.
20:56I feel safer all strapped in.
20:58Perfect.
20:59I feel like I'm on a flight.
21:00Right.
21:01I feel like I'm being laid to rest.
21:05As a larger woman who's been this size for a long time,
21:08I know the benefits of having a third party stretch you.
21:12The furthest we go is that comfortable deep stretch at a 7.
21:15There are lots of parts of my body that I can't stretch myself
21:18just because my body gets in the way,
21:20and in terms of my dad, he's definitely got a belly now,
21:23but also he's just not very flexible,
21:25and I don't think really probably has been in decades.
21:29So what we'll do here is we'll start out with this left side, okay,
21:32especially since this side bothers you a little more within the knees.
21:35We're going to be using that 3-5-7 intensity scale.
21:38Okay.
21:39We're going to start with your IT band outside the knee,
21:40outside the hip.
21:41That's where you should feel this.
21:42Let me know when you feel a 3 for a light stretch, okay?
21:43Yes, ma'am.
21:44I'm going to be honest with you.
21:45I haven't been in this position in a long time.
21:47Most people are not in this position when they stretch.
21:50Is that a comfortable point here?
21:52You could go more.
21:53A little more.
21:56Okay.
21:57So are you feeling it in the hip?
21:58Mm-hmm.
21:59Good.
22:00Beautiful.
22:01And like I said, 90 degrees is all we want out of that adductor.
22:04So basically I'm getting an A-plus so far.
22:06You're doing a great job so far.
22:07Okay.
22:08Absolutely.
22:09I'm really bad about tensing up when I stretch,
22:11so I'm trying to be conscious of that.
22:13Let me know when you feel that comfortable deep stretch.
22:15I think you can take me all the way.
22:17Beautiful.
22:18Go right to 90.
22:19There it is.
22:20And seven for a good deep stretch.
22:22Just light stretches here.
22:24Just going to work on some hip rotation, okay?
22:26Yeah, one more three.
22:28Now, what do you think?
22:29So I'll be 40 in a couple months.
22:31I'm just curious.
22:32What would you kind of rate my flexibility at for someone my age?
22:36I think your flexibility for someone in the 40 range is honestly above average.
22:40Yay.
22:41You've got above average mobility.
22:42Okay, good.
22:43Of course I love the validation of knowing that I am of an above average
22:48flexible 40-year-old person.
22:50Love to hear that.
22:51I wonder how my dad's doing.
22:52He's doing great over there it looks like.
22:54Hey, he's a lot more flexible than the way y'all were talking.
22:57That's for sure.
22:58Really?
22:59Oh, yeah.
23:00That feels amazing.
23:01Awesome.
23:02Oh, yes.
23:03Oh, my gosh.
23:04Isaiah, you've got to watch your girl.
23:05She's having a good time.
23:07Don't worry.
23:08He's not the jealous type.
23:09Oh, my God at all.
23:10Beautiful.
23:11Awesome.
23:12Great.
23:13You did an excellent job for your first session.
23:16That was very fun.
23:17Yeah, I thought so, too.
23:18I enjoyed working with you.
23:20Yes, sir.
23:21Nice meeting you.
23:22Y'all love your hair all messed up.
23:24I told him, I said, you can't fall asleep on the table now.
23:28You're moving good.
23:30See how I'm walking.
23:32How are we feeling?
23:33Are we feeling good?
23:34You're walking better.
23:35You're walking better.
23:36Dad, go ahead.
23:37Do a strut.
23:38Do a strut.
23:39Go ahead.
23:40There you go.
23:42Okay.
23:45Somebody put him on the runway.
23:47I think we want to know.
23:49I feel fantastic, and I think that Dad has got some pep in his step.
23:53Like, definitely a success.
23:55Are you almost done working on the garage?
23:57It's going to get done.
23:59I promise, Eddie.
24:00It's going to get done, and it's going to be more beautiful.
24:02It's going to be great.
24:03And more wonderful than you could ever imagine.
24:05Right, Jess?
24:06Yes, it's going to be great.
24:07I promise.
24:08I thought you were going to let me see what you were throwing away.
24:10I just want to let you know that Hunter gave me permission to get rid of the chair,
24:15so that's what I was getting rid of.
24:19Wow.
24:20And that's all.
24:21At this point, Dad is really dying to check on the progress that we've done in the garage.
24:28Any minute now, I expect him to be barging in the Thor house, with or without me.
24:34I've got a lot of work to do.
24:36And if Jessica and Isaiah would come over and help me finish.
24:40I'll come whenever you need me.
24:41You want me tomorrow?
24:42I mean, I need muscles, Dad.
24:43You know how much crap you got in there?
24:45I know Whitney, and she loves to surprise you.
24:49I don't have any doubt that she is doing a really good job,
24:53and she doesn't want me to see any progress until it's finished.
24:58I've been working for three days now, and I can't get the bank account to balance.
25:03See, this is his new job.
25:04He goes to the coffee shop in the morning, and he balances my bank account.
25:08Why does your bank account keep getting lower?
25:11Well, I told you I had a special project.
25:13As my financial manager, it's your business.
25:16But as my dad, it's none of your business.
25:19You can suspend your financial advisory services.
25:22Well, you know how excited I am every time I get it to balance.
25:25But I have things going on that you don't need to know about.
25:28All right.
25:30So, I had an appointment with a matchmaker.
25:32Okay.
25:33And she gave me assignments, like I'm supposed to go someplace where men are or whatever.
25:36She does.
25:38But I have to do a whole portfolio.
25:39I have to do a photo shoot.
25:40Okay.
25:41Well, this is all very exciting.
25:42So, Jess, do you want to come to the dog park with me?
25:44Okay.
25:45My ultimate goal is for Whitney to find her Karen.
25:49Yeah.
25:50Oh.
25:51Well, Tad, I went down that road once or twice.
25:54Oh, my gosh.
25:56I mean, I could go back.
25:57In the male version.
25:58I like a Karen, like, on a weekend.
26:03But I like a Ken, you know, Monday through Friday.
26:19Oh, my gosh.
26:20Hey.
26:21Hey.
26:22I can step on it?
26:23Yeah.
26:24Come on in.
26:25How are you?
26:26Oh, it looks so good.
26:27I'm good.
26:28Wow.
26:29Yeah, we still got to clean and all that.
26:32But we're wrapping things up.
26:34So nice.
26:36Oh, I love it.
26:38I am blown away by the floor.
26:41It has already given me a foundation for a room that is a 180 from what I started with.
26:48I think it looks beautiful.
26:50I think the color is just right.
26:52I am so into it.
26:54And I know that my dad is going to love it.
26:59Once the paint's, everything's done, it's going to kind of have that man cave vibe going.
27:03I want it to be, like, dark and sophisticated.
27:05I'm so glad you're not going, like, standard.
27:07Like, you know, oh, let's just do white.
27:09We'll just do, like, a plain gray wall.
27:10Boring.
27:11Yeah, no, this is going to be awesome.
27:12I'm going to have him a little desk over here because he works still every day.
27:15So, and a little couch there.
27:17He's going to be shocked.
27:18Yeah, I can't wait.
27:20I'm thankful that one thing for this renovation is done, but I have a million more things to think about.
27:26Even though the floors look amazing, the painting still has to get done.
27:30The wallpaper, the fixtures, and a lot of finishing touches.
27:34So, I have definitely got my work cut out for me.
27:36And hopefully I'll convince my dad not to sell this house.
27:40Okay, great.
27:41I'm going to get out of here.
27:42Good to see y'all.
27:43All right, you as well.
27:44Yeah, you too.
27:46You guys want a drink or something?
27:48Oh, um, I'm confusion mild to moderate.
27:51I have never in my life been approached by a man in public who has asked to buy me a drink.
27:56Um, how old are you?
27:57I'm 22.
27:58Oh, my God.
27:59How old?
28:0022.
28:16Okay, babies.
28:19Hi, babies.
28:22Hi.
28:24Okay, Lilo, with your pearls.
28:27Come here, honey.
28:29Come on, Woos.
28:32Are you going to play?
28:34Are you going to play, girl?
28:36One of the matchmaker's homework assignments for me was to go out into a public place where there are men.
28:42So a dog bar is an obvious choice, and the bonus is that I get to bring Goosey.
28:48Goosey, come on, honey.
28:51Look, doggy friends.
28:54It's been a long time since I've been in public, really with anyone, but definitely men.
28:59The upside to this is that, like, at least I have some really cute dogs to look at.
29:05Look at all these doggies.
29:08Goodness, there's lots of dogs here.
29:10Oh, my gosh.
29:11Oh, my gosh.
29:14There are so many dogs here.
29:16I know.
29:17This is not what I was expecting.
29:18Goosey.
29:19Look, I brought Lilo, too, you know, Todd's little clients.
29:22Look, she's over there.
29:24Jessica is so invested in my dating journey, so she agreed to come to Doggo's with me to hunt for men.
29:30Although I'm not sure if Goosey or Jessica is going to be the better wing woman.
29:35Oh, my goodness.
29:36See, Goosey, look at how people are playing.
29:38Goosey, play.
29:39Goosey, play.
29:40Goosey doggies.
29:42Go sniff some butts, Goose.
29:44Poor Goosey.
29:45Look, she's so awkward, isn't she?
29:47God, is that how I look out here?
29:49No.
29:51No.
29:52No.
29:53If you love your animal, you fit in here.
29:56Oh, my God.
29:57Hi.
29:59How are you?
30:00Good.
30:01Good to see you.
30:03So, how you been?
30:04I'm good.
30:05Good.
30:06You got a girlfriend?
30:07Myself.
30:08Okay.
30:09Yeah, working on that.
30:10Okay.
30:11Is it a new or an old?
30:12New.
30:13A new?
30:14It's always a new with you, isn't it?
30:15No, it's not always a new.
30:16Yes, it is.
30:18I actually spot an old friend of mine who used to live with me and does a lot of work for me.
30:23I affectionately call him Handy Andy, so I'm immediately more comfortable.
30:28And, duh, I'm hoping that he can be my connection to finding a man.
30:34Well, I'm trying to get like you.
30:36I'm trying to find me.
30:37I haven't had a new in, you know, a long time.
30:41Embarrassing, but I had an appointment with a matchmaker, like a legit matchmaker.
30:46And she was like, you need to go.
30:47This is my first homework.
30:48She was like, you need to go someplace where there are men.
30:51So, I figured that there would be men if there were dogs.
30:53Yeah, yeah, yeah.
30:54A lot of men here.
30:56Goosey, are you trying to be a dog at least?
30:59Don't stay with Mommy.
31:00Go play.
31:02Well, hello.
31:03Goosey, Goosey, go find you a boyfriend.
31:07Let's see if I see anybody cute.
31:08I should have brought binoculars.
31:09Oh, no, that's not chill, is it?
31:12No.
31:13Well, I thought I saw a cute one, too, and now I don't see him.
31:15Was he standing like right in front of us?
31:16Yeah, in the hat.
31:18Oh, oh, oh.
31:19Yeah, with the longish hair?
31:20Yeah, yeah, he's cute.
31:21I thought he was really cute.
31:22Yeah, he's cute.
31:23Andy!
31:25Handy Andy, I got a question, since you're here all the time.
31:28Now, who is this man?
31:29Do you know this man over here?
31:30The black hat?
31:31Yes.
31:32Phillip?
31:33Is he single?
31:34Yeah.
31:36Do me a favor.
31:39He's here a lot.
31:40I'm scared.
31:41I was going to say just give him my number.
31:42Do I have to talk to him?
31:43Can you just give him my number?
31:45Oh, God, he just looked over there.
31:47All right, just do it.
31:48Just do it.
31:49This is my assignment.
31:50Yes, I'm supposed to like, I'm supposed to get a number or give a number.
31:52Phillip, Phillip.
31:53Okay, and don't, but don't, you know, just be cool with it.
31:55Just be cool with it.
31:56Oh, my God.
31:58Wait, we can't just stare at him.
32:00We should be facing the other way.
32:01Fluffy girl, come here.
32:03Okay, I'm pretty sure Whitney is supposed to be the one approaching men.
32:07Like, I'm pretty sure that that's like what the matchmaker had in mind.
32:11But, you know, baby steps.
32:13I'll give her that, baby steps.
32:15Oh, God, he's, oh, he's doing it.
32:16He's talking to him.
32:17He is doing it.
32:18Hi.
32:19Okay, yeah.
32:20What are they doing?
32:21Are they doing it?
32:22Putting out the vibe.
32:23Are they doing it?
32:24I don't know.
32:25I'm scared to look.
32:26Is he looking here?
32:27Yep.
32:28Oh, here comes Handy Andy.
32:29Huh?
32:30Oh, girlfriend?
32:31Okay.
32:32Sorry.
32:33That's okay.
32:34It's better than just like, no, I don't want her number.
32:35No, no, no.
32:36Okay, yeah.
32:38That was scary.
32:39That was scary.
32:40My heart's beating fast.
32:41That was scary for me.
32:43Okay, do you know any other friends that you have that are single?
32:45Everyone's married with like 20-year-old kids.
32:47What is that?
32:48No, that's the thing.
32:49It's like, oh, God, Hunter's got a girlfriend now.
32:52So, I'm like, you know what?
32:53If Hunter ends up getting married, then I've really lost all hope.
32:56Don't face it.
32:57And I haven't found someone.
32:58Uh-uh.
32:59Mm-mm.
33:01It's tough out here in these streets.
33:03Even though I am actually loving being planted in the middle of this dog bar
33:07and like looking at all the adorable pups,
33:09it seems that pretty much every man here is attached.
33:13So, what other things are on your list from the matchmaker?
33:18I've got to submit her some nice photos.
33:21She said I had to like do a photo shoot.
33:23Okay.
33:24Hi.
33:25How are y'all?
33:26Hey, how's it going?
33:27We're good.
33:28That's good.
33:29Oh, sorry.
33:30Do you want something?
33:31Oh, um, I'm good.
33:33Where's my coffee?
33:34Yeah, but thank you so much.
33:35Which dog is yours, first of all?
33:36It's the gray dog right there.
33:37Okay.
33:38I'm confusion mild to moderate.
33:40Truthfully, I have never in my life ever been approached by a man in public
33:45who has asked to buy me a drink.
33:47How old is she?
33:48She's like a year and a half.
33:49Oh, that's a long time.
33:50So, I got her the day she was born.
33:51So, I was like, I'm not even going to keep her.
33:56That's how I ended up with all the cats.
33:58I've got three cats.
33:59My roommate has a cat.
34:00I don't really.
34:01What kind?
34:02I don't know.
34:03You got a picture?
34:04Yeah.
34:05Let me see.
34:06I love cats.
34:07Oh, that's a pretty cat.
34:08What was your name?
34:09Simon.
34:10Simon, I'm Jessica.
34:11And I'm Whitney.
34:12Nice to meet you.
34:13Nice to meet you.
34:14Sorry, my hands are full.
34:15I got the baby.
34:16How old are you?
34:17I'm 22.
34:18Oh, my God.
34:19You're how old?
34:2022.
34:21Do you like older women?
34:24Yeah.
34:25Oh.
34:26Yeah.
34:27Okay.
34:29Well, it's nice to meet you, Simon.
34:30You guys sure you don't want a drink or anything?
34:31Oh, we're fine.
34:32Yeah.
34:33We're probably going to head out, too.
34:34It's nice to meet you.
34:35Bye.
34:36Nice to meet you.
34:37Well, he was nice.
34:38He was nice.
34:39He was, like, really nice.
34:40To be honest, I don't know if I'm attracted to
34:43or interested in Simon.
34:44It's certainly not practical to be,
34:46considering that he's, like, 20 years younger than me.
34:49But I'm trying to take Alessandra's advice
34:51and just see this as practice
34:53and, like, know that we don't have to get married,
34:55but I might as well work my dating muscles.
34:59I am so cold.
35:00Are you?
35:01Freezing.
35:02This is my, you know, this is my perfect.
35:04Oh, God, I thought that was a person.
35:07I felt violated briefly.
35:09Ooh, ooh, ooh.
35:10Still do.
35:11Why am I so popular with the dogs?
35:14You asked me, how did I land on The Matchmaker,
35:16and I'm just telling you,
35:17my standards are so high now, I can't even hoe anymore.
35:21You can always find satisfaction in hoeing.
35:23And you're not upset about that?
35:25Because he's a boy.
35:26He didn't really mean that.
35:27Oh, I did.
35:28Oh, my God, the misogyny.
35:30Oh, my God.
35:45Look how fast he's walking.
35:46He doesn't see it.
35:47Oh, my gosh.
35:48Look at him.
35:49He's not shuffling or waddling.
35:50He's not.
35:51Dad!
35:52Hey.
35:53Well, damn, they didn't recognize you.
35:55Yeah.
35:56I looked over, I said, well, there's Dad,
35:58and in a flash, you were already there.
36:01We about to eat?
36:03Yeah, let's go.
36:04Even though I finally got out of the house with Jessica
36:06to meet men in real life,
36:08I definitely still need to get out more.
36:11How are you?
36:12I'm good, how are you?
36:13So good to see you.
36:14You know, I need to have at least, like,
36:1510 people on the roster,
36:16so that one of them will actually work out for a date.
36:20So I'm happy to join my dad to his favorite restaurant.
36:23Hi, Ruchi.
36:24How beautiful you look.
36:26Look at you.
36:27Good to see you.
36:28Hi, Glenn.
36:29And you look gorgeous.
36:31Something different about you.
36:33Well, it's very preliminary still,
36:35but I did have an appointment with a matchmaker,
36:37and I know that you met with a matchmaker, so, you know.
36:41I think it was like an instant chemistry,
36:43and I think that is the most important thing.
36:46Everything else will follow.
36:48So here we are.
36:49Wow.
36:5035 years later.
36:52Wow.
36:53Fantastic.
36:54I'm like about to cry.
36:56Ravi and his wife's love story is so sweet,
36:59and that's all the hopefulness I need to remind myself
37:04that it's not over till it's over,
37:06and just when you least expect it, anything can happen.
37:09Oh.
37:10So I'm about to turn 40.
37:12It's a milestone.
37:13You know, it's a thing.
37:14So I just want to be really special,
37:16because it's my 40th birthday.
37:17Yeah.
37:18I'm feeling a little bit more optimistic in life,
37:20and I decided I want to do a big trip.
37:22I want to do something crazy.
37:23So we're all going to, I haven't told you guys this yet,
37:26but we're all going to go to Spain.
37:28Oh, wow.
37:29Wow.
37:30Okay.
37:31That's great.
37:32I thought you should make a trip to India.
37:34If that's where my man is, I'll be there.
37:36You guys enjoy.
37:38Thank you, Ravi.
37:39So where are we going in Spain?
37:40Exactly.
37:41So this is the thing.
37:42I started searching locations in Spain.
37:44I wanted it to be around water,
37:46so I found this place.
37:47It's called Marbella, and it's on the southern coast.
37:51It's, like, on a clear day, you can see right over to Africa.
37:53It's, like, right near, like, Morocco.
37:55And also, Spain, of course, is the birthplace of flamenco.
37:59I'm feeling this already.
38:00Yeah, exactly.
38:01Todd and I just signed up for, like, a flamenco class
38:04over at the Cultural Arts Center.
38:06The inspiration for my 40th birthday trip is flamenco.
38:11I actually was just browsing on the Internet,
38:14and I went down a rabbit hole of flamenco dancers.
38:16I thought it was so amazing.
38:18I realized I'd never taken a class like that,
38:20and that was it for me.
38:22Like, once I get my mindset on something,
38:24I am a very decisive person.
38:27So I found this one hotel that looks really nice,
38:30on the water, and this was, like,
38:32the one that had availability for, like,
38:34because I want to invite, I mean, all the friends, you know?
38:37I want to invite Karen.
38:38Well, yeah, of course.
38:39Yeah.
38:40Because I want to flamenco dance,
38:41and she might be upset.
38:43And do it with somebody else.
38:44Do it with somebody else.
38:45Yeah.
38:46We're going to Spain, and I've never been to Spain.
38:50Leaving to Whitney to do her 40th birthday big.
38:54I'm very excited about it.
38:56So why did you do the matchmaker?
38:58Well, really a last-ditch resort.
39:00Actually, who suggested a towel?
39:03Which is funny because I came home the other day,
39:06and he made me strip naked.
39:08He looked up this, like, sexual energy cleansing spell.
39:12Uh-huh.
39:13That took place in a swimming pool in the living room.
39:17I don't know if it cleansed my sexual energy or not.
39:20It's supposed to unclog you or something.
39:22What are you eating, Hunter?
39:25Why is that the funniest thing anyone's said all night?
39:27I am eating wedge salad with aji tuna.
39:32It's raw tuna.
39:33Raw tuna.
39:34So after the whole ritual bath, all the friends came.
39:37And then, you know, I think it was just that she was like,
39:40it tells me my standards are too high, right?
39:42And I'm like,
39:43I think that you just think my standards are too high for who I am.
39:46Like, someone my size can't have standards this high.
39:48People think, oh, Whitney's so desperate.
39:50Bitch, if I was desperate, I'd have had every kind of man.
39:54Because if I was...
39:55Hadn't you?
39:56For one night.
39:57I'm saying not for long-term, if I were that desperate.
39:59And I don't even sleep around anymore.
40:01God.
40:02Well...
40:03How did...
40:04Dad, you said it yourself.
40:06Dad, you said...
40:07I don't want to hear any more of this conversation.
40:09You said that before you dated Mom,
40:10you felt confident that you wanted Mom because you had dated her,
40:12and you had sowed your seed.
40:13Now, that's what you said.
40:14I didn't say anything.
40:15They sowed the seed.
40:16Well, Angie would tell us differently, Dad.
40:18Yeah.
40:19So, let's not act afraid.
40:21I am on the cusp of my 40th year, and I am not a virgin.
40:24Yeah.
40:26I don't enjoy hearing my daughter talk so casually
40:28about intimate relations that she's had.
40:31I mean, she's making things a little uncomfortable.
40:35I'm happy that she's a confident woman,
40:37but I don't need to be included in this type of conversation.
40:41You asked me how did I land on The Matchmaker,
40:43and I'm just telling you.
40:44Because that's the thing.
40:45My standards are so high now,
40:46and I'm so worn out and over everything,
40:49I can't even hoe anymore.
40:51When you get to the point that you can't even find
40:53any satisfaction in hoeing...
40:55God.
40:56It's...
40:57You can always find satisfaction in hoeing.
40:59And you're not upset about that.
41:01You over here acting mad, and you let him talk like that,
41:03and you're not mad about that.
41:04I am.
41:05Because he's a boy.
41:06So it's okay.
41:07No.
41:08Hunter said there is no shame in ever hoeing.
41:10He didn't really mean that.
41:11Oh, I did.
41:12Oh, my God.
41:13The misogyny is making my skull explode.
41:18Oh, my God.
41:19I meant it.
41:20I cannot believe what I'm hearing right now
41:23because my dad has this unfair double standard
41:25when it comes to who can and who can't talk openly about sex.
41:28And I also feel like my dad always has a judgmental attitude
41:31about my sex life, which I don't have time for.
41:34And it is absurd.
41:37In my day, we might have called that, you know,
41:40an intimate relationship, not hoeing.
41:43Whitney's a modern woman.
41:47I appreciate that.
41:48Uh-huh.
41:49Can we talk more about Spain or...?
41:55See, Dad wants to talk about it until we really talk about it.
42:00Oh.
42:02Next time on My Big Fat Fabulous Life...
42:05Jeez, that's too much.
42:07I'm having a photo shoot to get photos that Alessandra,
42:10the matchmaker, can use in my portfolio.
42:13Are we considering doing anything maybe fully nude?
42:16Jessica!
42:17It doesn't take me a whole lot for me to just be off to the races.
42:21Just grab your boobies for me.
42:23Oh, my God.
42:25Yes, just go. Just go.
42:27Yes, just go. Just go.
42:29There's a lot of time to bridezilla.
42:31Maddie, look.
42:32Y'all, stop telling her to look.
42:33She's not going to look. It's fine.
42:35I'm not making any predictions.