Rising Damp - 104 [couchtripper][U]
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00:30It's no good, I can't concentrate. Spooner's had that radio on and off all night.
00:39Well, why don't you tell him about it?
00:41What, me tell Spooner? He's a professional wrestler, mate. My body doesn't bend easily
00:46these days.
00:47I'm sure he'd be reasonable.
00:49Well, I'm not. Unless it's his legged plaster, it's been impossible. He blames the whole
00:53medical profession just because it itches. I don't think he'd be quite so angry if he'd
00:58have done it in the ring, but tripping over the cat, that's what really annoys him.
01:02Yes, he blames Rigsby. He says that cat's Rigsby's evil spirit. He's going to wring
01:06its neck.
01:07He'll do it, too, you know. Spooner was a Red Devil.
01:09Who's he?
01:10Airborne division during the war.
01:12Oh, the parachute boys.
01:13I don't think Spooner bothered with a parachute. He's as hard as nails. He's the one who used
01:19to lay across the barbed wire for everyone else to run over. He used to break doors down
01:23with his head. I'm not telling him to turn his radio down.
01:28Now, come on, come on, come on, Vienna. Don't stand about on the stairs like that. We don't
01:33want another accident, do we? Who's a naughty boy?
01:36Mr. Rigsby?
01:37Oh?
01:38I really must complain about Mr. Spooner's radio. It was on all last night.
01:41Ah, yes, yes. I'll tell him about it, Miss Jones. Yes, it's his leg, you see. He can't
01:44scratch it.
01:45I guess my radio Luxembourg's going to help. I hardly closed my eyes last night.
01:50Never have known that, Miss Jones. You look morning fresh, as usual.
01:53Well, I don't feel it. I feel shattered.
01:55I'm not surprised the stuff you get on the wireless these days.
01:57Well, where have all the decent programmes gone to, eh? What happened to In Town tonight?
02:02I'm sure I don't know, Mr. Rigsby. That was before my time.
02:05And what about Uncle Matt, then? Good night, children. Everywhere.
02:08Still brings a lump to the throat, eh?
02:10Well, if you could have a word with Mr. Spooner.
02:12No sooner said than done, Miss Jones.
02:14Thank you.
02:15And if you find you can't sleep, you knock on my door, all right? I don't sleep much
02:19myself, not since Anzio. And make a cup of tea, we can have a chat about the old days.
02:24Oh, well, Mr. Rigsby, I don't think our old days are quite the same.
02:29In fact, I had very few old days.
02:33Go on, go on, Deanna. Go on, off you go.
02:35I don't think Uncle Spooner wants to see you at the moment.
02:37I don't think he'd have your tripes out.
02:41Yes?
02:45What do you want?
02:47Hello, Spooner. How are you feeling?
02:50I'll give you three guesses, Rigsby.
02:52Does it hurt?
02:54It hurts, of course it hurts. What do you think it's doing?
02:57It's throbbing like mad. All I can do is sit here staring at the goldfish.
03:00Oh, yeah, yeah. Funny pest, goldfish.
03:04They don't trip you up on the stairs, though, do they?
03:07Oh, well, never mind. Hey, that throbbing's a good sign, eh?
03:09Shows it's getting better. Back in the ring in no time, eh, Spooner?
03:13Do you want me to autograph it?
03:14Eh?
03:15Your leg. They do that in hospitals. It provides a bit of amusement.
03:18You touch that leg, Rigsby, and I'll provide you with a bit of amusement.
03:22Well, I hope you're not bearing a grievance, Spooner.
03:24I mean, you can't blame me, and you can't blame Vienna.
03:27It's not his fault you didn't see him.
03:29I can't put lights on him, can I?
03:32I know he feels sorry for you. He likes you, Spooner.
03:34That's why he rubbed against your legs.
03:36Oh, he rubbed against my legs, all right.
03:39I'd have brought him up to sea. Only now his fur gets up your nose.
03:42Anyway, as long as you don't bear him any ill will.
03:45Do you know what I'm going to do, Rigsby, when I get out of this plaster?
03:48No.
03:49I'm going to get hold of that flea-ridden monster and wring his scruffy neck.
03:53And then do you know what I'm going to do?
03:54I'm going to beat you to death with a carcass.
03:56Now, listen, I wouldn't touch Vienna if I were you, mate.
03:58Anything happens to him, what about his little friends, eh?
04:00Where will they go?
04:01They'll be after you.
04:03There's 30,000 of them. You know the sound of marching feet, don't you, Spooner?
04:14Hey, you.
04:15When are you going to tell Spooner about that radio?
04:18You must make allowances. The man's suffering.
04:20So wait.
04:21You could at least tell him to turn it down.
04:23You know your trouble, don't you?
04:24You never stop complaining.
04:25Nothing suits you.
04:26The room doesn't suit you.
04:27The furniture doesn't suit you.
04:28What furniture?
04:30What do you expect for the money you pay, G-Plan?
04:33I suppose you'd like lights shining through polystyrene, eh?
04:36Occasional coffee tables, no drapes.
04:38Settle for a few cushions.
04:40Cushions?
04:41You won't be satisfied.
04:42This place looks like the inside of a Turkish brothel.
04:45If I'd have put any more furniture in here, you'd be overcrowded.
04:48And whose fault's that?
04:49Exactly.
04:50Well, of course, I know tensions must arise.
04:53Up here, under the circumstances, of course.
04:55What circumstances?
04:56Well, nerves about to get taut, aren't they?
04:58You know, different ethnic groups, alien cultures.
05:00Do you mean because I'm black?
05:02Did I say that?
05:03Did that word pass my lip?
05:05I don't know.
05:06We have to be very careful these days, don't we?
05:08Look what happened to Enid Blyton.
05:11What's Enid Blyton got to do with it?
05:13She got into trouble because Noddy didn't like Gollywog.
05:16Are you talking about me?
05:17No, I'm talking about Enid Blyton.
05:19But we get on perfectly well, thank you very much.
05:21Good, because if there's any trouble, you'll be the one to go.
05:23He's fireproof.
05:25Victimised minority.
05:27He's got rights.
05:28What about my rights?
05:30You haven't got me.
05:32My father told me when he brought me up here that you'd take advantage of my good nature.
05:35Oh, yes, yes, I remember him.
05:37Yes, he was the one who kept jumping up and down to see if the floor creaked.
05:40Ended up with his foot through the plaster.
05:42Yes, I remember him.
05:43He didn't like this place either, I suppose.
05:45He didn't say anything.
05:46He didn't say anything.
05:48You should have seen some of the billets I was in during the war, mate.
05:50Turn your stomach over.
05:52He was in the war.
05:53Oh, yeah?
05:54What was he in?
05:55The Royal Air Force.
05:57Oh, blue cream boy.
05:59He's bald.
06:01There was a show of that lot, fought the war in carpet slippers.
06:03My father didn't.
06:05What did he think of the room then?
06:07Thought it was eye up.
06:09Oh, he would.
06:11That's typical, typical of the RAF.
06:13None of them could stand high, so you couldn't get most of up the ladder.
06:14We were on parade with them in Manchester.
06:16They were a spectacle.
06:18There was 500 of them.
06:20They didn't make a sound.
06:22They were like ghosts.
06:24Do you know what they were wearing?
06:26Rubber boots.
06:27The Women's Land Army could march better than them and they were pushing wheelbarrows.
06:29Surely the RAF was supposed to fly, not march, Rigsby.
06:31Oh, you mean those mysterious objects standing at the end of the runway, held together with
06:33canvas and string?
06:35No, no.
06:37They never went near them.
06:39They went everywhere by luxury coach.
06:41What about 1940?
06:42What happened?
06:44A battle of Britain, mate.
06:46He must have heard about that even in your remote outpost.
06:48He must have beat that out on the drums.
06:50Battle of the great iron birds, first of the few, mate.
06:56Churchill said, never was so much given by so many to so few.
06:59Never in the field of human conflict was so much owed by so few.
07:03To so many, to so few.
07:05To so few.
07:09Anyway, what do we owe your father?
07:11What do you mean?
07:12A glorious page of history was being written, but he wasn't doing victory rolls over Biggin Hill.
07:16He was in the stores.
07:19I thought so, never saw an angry man.
07:21Yes, well of course he's not the type.
07:23Most of them were public school lads, you know, born leaders.
07:26You mean just because my father didn't talk with a plum in his mouth?
07:29No, no, no, no. They were born to it.
07:31You know, he'd know what I mean.
07:33All that rugby and flicking each other with reptiles.
07:36They're daft.
07:37Hey, don't let that foppish man fool you, mate.
07:40Underneath he had nerves of steel, those lads.
07:42Even if they did climb into the Spitfires with teddy bears under their arms.
07:46Don't you underestimate them either.
07:48I'd love to have them make that mistake.
07:50Nah, he'd always count on the boys in blue when the pressure was on.
07:53How do you know you can't count on me when the pressure's on?
07:55You?
07:56Yeah, well, it's not my fault I missed a war, is it?
07:58Perhaps I could have been doing victory rolls over Biggin Hill.
08:01No, you're not a man of action.
08:03No, you don't know, Rigsby.
08:05Perhaps I could have been a warrior.
08:06Yeah, it's not likely though, is it?
08:07I mean, you've done nothing but complain about Spooner's reign.
08:09If you won't tell him about it, you want me to do it.
08:11Ah, well, that's different.
08:12He is a professional wrestler.
08:14He is a professional wrestler with one leg at the moment and you're still proud of him.
08:18Suppose he turns nasty?
08:19Yes, well, of course, if you're afraid of him, yes.
08:21I'm not afraid.
08:22Don't be a fool, Alan.
08:23I'm not afraid.
08:24Yes, you are.
08:25I'll go down and tell him now.
08:26Spooner's been drinking, Alan.
08:28I don't care.
08:37Spooner, what do you want?
08:40How's your leg?
08:44I've been looking at it.
08:45I think they've turned it the wrong way.
08:48I'll end up walking like a penguin.
08:51I shouldn't worry about it, Spooner.
08:52They know what they're doing.
08:56Spooner, about that transistor.
08:58What about it?
09:01Can I borrow it?
09:03No.
09:05It's all I've got.
09:06That and the gold.
09:07Remember, you were a red devil.
09:09Well, that was a long time ago.
09:11I get dizzy stepping off a pavement nowadays.
09:15How many jumps have you had?
09:16Eh?
09:18Oh, 56.
09:20Right, yeah.
09:21Yeah, I could come right down for 3,000 feet and land on a sixpence.
09:24One mistake and they'd be scraping you off the tarmac like strawberry jam.
09:29And in all that time, I never so much as twisted my ankle.
09:32I was taught to fall, you see.
09:34Came down those stairs like a sack of potatoes, didn't you?
09:38Well, I wasn't expecting it, was I?
09:40That mangy cat.
09:42I think Rigsby taught her to do that, you know.
09:45Well, I mean, if you want any help, Spooner, you know,
09:47like peeling your spuds, getting your medicine, all that.
09:49Yeah, well, thanks very much, Alan.
09:51You know, you're the only one round here that's shown any sympathy.
09:54Well, I like that.
09:55I mean, I can't ignore human suffering.
09:57See these hands?
09:58Trained to heal.
10:00I have this marvellous soothing quality.
10:02It's amazing how quiet people become when I get near the bed.
10:05I don't know. I don't know.
10:07Oh! Oh!
10:10It'll only just stop throbbing and all.
10:13I thought you said your hands were trained to heal.
10:15Well, they are.
10:16Well, these hands have been trained to kill.
10:17Now, get out of here before I start using them.
10:19Oh! Oh!
10:21Look at this, Spooner.
10:22Fifteen stone wrestler, you're behaving like a baby.
10:24You know what you are, eh?
10:25You know what you are?
10:26A fake.
10:27A fake?
10:28Yeah.
10:29I always thought wrestling was fixed.
10:31Oh!
10:35What happened?
10:37Can't hear anything, can you?
10:39What do you mean, you told him?
10:40You're very pale.
10:42Usually I'm when I'm angry.
10:43Oh, don't believe it.
10:46Don't let this foppish manner fool you, Rigsby.
10:49Underneath, there are nerves of steel.
10:52I could have been up there.
10:54Over the Weald of Kent.
10:56Oh!
10:58Over the Weald of Kent.
11:00A couple of 109s before breakfast.
11:03I looked him straight in the eye
11:05and told him it was a fake.
11:07You said that to Spooner.
11:08I can't believe it.
11:12Did you really say that?
11:14Yeah.
11:15I didn't know you had the nerve.
11:16Ah!
11:17It's at times like this, Philip, when we realise
11:20what we're really made of.
11:22What's that?
11:25It's Spooner.
11:27He's coming for me.
11:32It's stopped.
11:33Oh, don't let him get me, Philip.
11:34Don't let him get me.
11:43Hello, Biggles.
11:47You turned out to be a right nappy candle, didn't you?
11:51Sure, Rigsby.
11:53You're not surprised.
11:54I saw them go like that in the war.
11:55You know, all talk till the first sign of danger,
11:57then they fell apart.
11:58You'd have been one of the first to crack.
12:00What about you, Rigsby?
12:01Why don't you tell Spooner?
12:02Me? I'm not complaining.
12:03My little bit of music doesn't worry me.
12:05You won't go because Spooner threatened to wring your neck.
12:08I'm surprised that someone who faced the might of the German army
12:10should be afraid of Spooner.
12:12That is, if you did face the might of the German army.
12:14Oh, yes.
12:15And what are you getting at?
12:16Only that I always thought English heroes were supposed to be modest.
12:19Yeah, I know.
12:20The people who really saw action never talk about it.
12:22Oh, well, you know why, don't you?
12:23Because nobody listens anymore.
12:24They're not interested.
12:25They just want to forget the whole thing, that's all.
12:27Yeah, just a couple of poppies on Armistice Day.
12:30That's about it.
12:31Yeah, the parades get shorter every year.
12:33They can't even be bothered to keep quiet for the two-minute silence now.
12:35They'd rather hold a pop festival any day.
12:38You know, I often wonder what we saved this country for, you know.
12:41Hey, what happened to all the old traditions, eh?
12:43What happened to good old British grit?
12:45I think you're sweeping most of it under the carpet.
12:50Listen, mate, I was one of the first.
12:52I was there.
12:53I didn't take any notice of old Chamberlain, you know.
12:55In my hand I have a piece of paper.
12:57He only knew what he could do with that.
13:00And I saw action, too.
13:01Don't you make it...
13:02Now, look, if you don't believe me, mate, what about this?
13:05What do you think...
13:08What do you think this is?
13:12Looks like your nipple.
13:14No, sorry, it's the wrong side.
13:16Here.
13:17Do you think that is...
13:19That's your other nipple.
13:20No, no, no.
13:21Here, here, here.
13:23Shrapnel, mate.
13:24If that moves another inch, I'll be the last casualty of World War II.
13:28Oh.
13:29Oh, shit.
13:30Ah, now, here's somebody who knows what it was like to go without during the war.
13:35What, what, excuse me?
13:36No orange juice for you, was there, Miss Jones?
13:38Well, I was very small.
13:40I was only a baby.
13:41Well, you must remember it, though.
13:43You know, ration books, gas masks.
13:45Potato Pete, Dr. Carrot, Victory Pie.
13:47No, I don't remember.
13:48I mean, I was still in my pram.
13:50Yes, but it was the People's War, though, wasn't it, Miss Jones?
13:52I mean, everyone suffered.
13:53Well, it was some years before I saw a banana.
13:55Yes, there you are, you see.
13:56And Mother always insisted that we were machine-gunned coming from the vicarage.
14:00She was pushing me in my pram, and this Messerschmitt died very low.
14:03She saw the pilot quite clearly.
14:05In fact, she swore it was somebody she'd met in Germany before the war.
14:09What she must have said to him to make him go to those lengths, I can't imagine.
14:13There you are. What do you think of that, eh?
14:15Miss Jones even defied the Luftwaffe for my pram.
14:17That's what it was like in those days, mate.
14:19Blood, sweat, tears, sacrifice.
14:21You lot don't know you're born.
14:23Well, it's not my fault I was born too late, is it?
14:25I mean, I could have made sacrifices.
14:27You make...
14:28You fly into a tantrum if you have to go without your puffed rice.
14:32Sacrifice? You couldn't have made...
14:34Your hair's too long.
14:35Too many sticky sweets.
14:36No, you know your trouble?
14:38You never did your national service.
14:40So what?
14:41So what?
14:42What in the world, lad?
14:43You could have had your own Bren gun carrier at 18.
14:45A good bunch of mates.
14:47You wouldn't have been frightened of Spooner.
14:48Oh, that's what I really came up about.
14:50We really must do something about Mr Spooner.
14:52Oh, yes, yes.
14:53It was no good asking him, Miss Jones.
14:54He came back terrified.
14:55I wouldn't say that.
14:56He's right, Philip.
14:57Of course I'm right.
14:58He wants to get the spiders out of the bath for him.
14:59I do.
15:00It's true.
15:01OK, I'm a physical coward.
15:02I don't mind admitting it.
15:04It's the same when I was at home.
15:05All the dogs in the street used to bark at me.
15:08Even ours.
15:10There are different kinds of courage, Alan.
15:12I mean, we wouldn't like to go into a ward full of smallpox.
15:15Neither would I.
15:17It was all a long time ago.
15:18You don't want to listen to Rigsby's stories.
15:20I mean, how do we know what really happened?
15:22I beg your...
15:23Are you calling me a liar?
15:24All I'm saying is that the memory can sometimes play tricks.
15:27Oh, the memory...
15:28We'll see whose memory can play tricks, mate.
15:30Just you wait here a minute.
15:32Just you wait a minute.
15:34Now we're in for it.
15:36What do you mean?
15:37What do you mean?
15:38He'll be bringing up his burnished shell cases.
15:41And his letter from Monty.
15:43He'll be fighting World War II all over the house again.
15:46Shouting at us in German and kicking the door down.
15:48And telling us all those ridiculous stories.
15:50How he knocked out a German machine gun nest with an empty beer bottle.
15:53He never shuts up about it anymore.
15:55Hey! Act on, the house burns!
15:59Now then, I'll show you a thing or two.
16:01What's that?
16:02This.
16:03Evidence, mate.
16:04Mementos of five years of conflict.
16:06Well, I can't stay, Mr. Rigsby.
16:08I really only came up to complain about Mr. Spooner.
16:10Yes, yes, of course.
16:11I'm getting round to it.
16:12You know how hasty he can be.
16:14Spooner was a red devil.
16:16Were they on our side?
16:19We were never quite certain.
16:21I'll certainly tell him, Miss Jones.
16:23After all, I know it is my job.
16:24Would you, Mr. Rigsby?
16:25I'd be very grateful.
16:26Excuse me.
16:27Philip, can you come outside for a moment?
16:30My front tire needs pumping up.
16:33It's gone flat again.
16:37Never asked me to pump up my tires.
16:39Do you notice?
16:42Target, I don't know.
16:43At least I thought she'd be interested in these.
16:46Nobody's interested anymore.
16:48They soon forget what you've done for them, don't they?
16:51There were no flags up for me when I came home.
16:53No banners across the street saying,
16:55Welcome home from me.
16:56They hoped I wasn't coming.
16:59What were they ever doing for the war effort round here, eh?
17:01I mean, apart from that bloke opposite.
17:03Nothing.
17:04What did he do?
17:05Oh, he was the first to take his railings down for scrap iron.
17:10First to put them back up again when it was over, too.
17:14What's this?
17:16Ah, then.
17:17SS dagger.
17:18Sharp, isn't it?
17:20How many throats did that slit on the night of the long knives, I wonder?
17:25You see, you're not used to cold steel.
17:27All this electric shaving.
17:29Oh God, he's started to sing now.
17:32I suppose I'd better go and tell him.
17:33I did promise her.
17:34You could do yourself a bit of good as well.
17:36She did say she'd be grateful.
17:37Yeah.
17:38What if he turns nasty, though?
17:39Show him what you're made of.
17:41I won't need to.
17:42It'll be all over the floor.
17:43You're not frightened of him, are you, Riggsby?
17:45No.
17:46Well, just because he was a red devil.
17:48Huh.
17:49Well, it was a long time ago, you know.
17:50You've got nothing to worry about.
17:52I mean, you do want to win her respect, don't you?
17:54Well, I do.
17:55I do.
17:57I mean, you do want to win her respect, don't you?
17:59Yes, of course.
18:00Well, go on, then.
18:02Right.
18:14Get off me barrel!
18:16And I love London town.
18:20Hey, Stoner.
18:21You know, you can hear your voice all along the hall.
18:24What about it?
18:25You know, fantastic the way it carries, you know.
18:29I thought you'd come in to complain about it.
18:31Complain? No, of course not, Spooner.
18:32I was just about to give you that idea.
18:34Nice fellow to complain about it.
18:36I snapped him like a twig.
18:38Like a twig, eh, Spooner?
18:40He said I sang flat.
18:42You don't think I sing flat, do you, Riggsby?
18:43No, no, spot on, spot on.
18:45You've got a lovely voice.
18:47Well, I'm glad about that, because I'm in a nasty mood.
18:50And when I'm in a nasty mood, I'm inclined to do nasty things.
18:53Like tying people up in knots.
18:56You could see parts of your body you never knew existed.
18:59Please, Spooner.
19:00I saw action, you know.
19:02I've seen as much action as you have, mate.
19:03Where were you when the bullets were flying?
19:05Floating round the heavens like a bloody mushroom.
19:10And don't let me have to tell you again.
19:12That's the last time, all right?
19:13Now, you keep that radio down, because you don't frighten me, Spooner.
19:16I don't know the meaning of the word, all right?
19:24What did you have to do that for?
19:26It took me back years, that.
19:27You frightened the life out of me.
19:29Where did you get it?
19:30That? It came off a dead German, that.
19:34But where did you get that from?
19:36At the case.
19:38I'd almost forgotten about that.
19:39That's my old Captain's .45, that, you know.
19:42Is it loaded?
19:43Of course it's not loaded.
19:44You don't leave guns lying around loaded.
19:46Don't you know anything?
19:47On witty hands!
19:48Don't point that at me!
19:50But you said it wasn't loaded.
19:51You don't point guns at people, that's the first rule, all right?
19:54How did we win the war, then?
19:57God!
19:58Handle these things with respect, mate.
20:00Look at that, look at that action, eh?
20:02It's as smooth as the day it was made.
20:03Look at that.
20:11Why did you say it wasn't loaded?
20:14Oh!
20:19That gun was for left-wingers.
20:21I could have sworn I emptied it.
20:23Point is, where's it gone?
20:32It's on the line of flight.
20:36It'll be embedded in the plaster somewhere, I suppose.
20:39Eh?
20:40It's a hole in Spooner's door.
20:43What are you talking about?
20:44Oh, my God!
20:46I'll tell you something else as well.
20:48What?
20:49He stopped singing.
20:57Spooner?
20:59Spooner?
21:01Hey!
21:02Hey!
21:03Spoon!
21:08We shot him.
21:10Are you sure?
21:11Oh, God, I know a dead man in a sea with no doubt.
21:13God, what am I going to do?
21:14I couldn't go to prison.
21:15I'm too old, my heart's about to stop.
21:18Not surprisingly calm under the circumstances.
21:20I thought he'd be more upset.
21:21He should have been with Spooner.
21:23Oh, God, what am I going to do?
21:25I must have time to think.
21:26Oh, Mr. Rigsby, have you told Mr. Spooner yet?
21:28No, but he won't listen now.
21:30Well, I can't stand it any longer.
21:32I'll tell him myself.
21:33No, you can't go in there.
21:34Why not?
21:35Rigsby's just shot him.
21:37What?
21:38But he wouldn't turn his radio down.
21:41Wasn't that rather drastic?
21:43I'm sorry, I didn't mean to do it, Miss Jones.
21:45It was an accident.
21:46I didn't do it on purpose.
21:47I could never let a barn door open.
21:48I thought you said you were trained to kill.
21:50Whose side are you on?
21:52Can we look at him, or something?
21:53Oh, no, no, I couldn't go in.
21:54I never could stand the sight of blood.
21:56You go.
21:57Oh, God, Spooner, Spooner.
21:59He was so alive just a minute ago.
22:03Ow!
22:05One minute, one minute.
22:12Hey, wait a minute.
22:14It's a faint pulse.
22:17It's very fast.
22:18Alan, you're holding his wrist watch.
22:26Oh, I can't find it.
22:28Have you got a mirror?
22:29This is no time to be thinking about your appearance, Alan.
22:33Poor Mr. Spooner, we were so unkind to him.
22:35Can't you do anything?
22:36It's too late now.
22:38Death has cheated me again.
22:40Death has cheated me again.
22:43Poor old Spooner.
22:44Ah!
22:54Oh, my goodness, I couldn't help it.
22:56Come along.
23:03Oh, my God.
23:05Oh, Spoon, Spoon.
23:10He doesn't look too bad under the circumstances.
23:13Spoon, I'm sorry.
23:14I didn't mean it.
23:15It was an accident.
23:16I didn't do it on purpose.
23:17I promise I'll never do it again.
23:20Spoon, what can I say?
23:22Oh, God, just say one last word.
23:24Can you ever forgive me, Spooner?
23:26No, I can't forgive you!
23:28I've been trying to get to sleep for two days.
23:30And when I finally manage it,
23:31you're whispering in my ear
23:32like a sheep bullet through the door.
23:34You ruffian sod!
23:36You could have given me a heart attack.
23:38I'm aged ten years.
23:39Come on, Rigsby.
23:40I thought I'd never smile again.
23:42That's the biggest laugh I've had
23:43since I tripped over the cat.
23:45What's the matter, Rigsby?
23:46Where's your sense of humour?
23:47Can't you see the funny side of it?
23:49No, I cannot.
23:50Let the bullet end up, then, eh?
23:51Hey, that's the point.
23:52Oh!
23:53You poor little goldfish.
23:54What?
23:55They're on the carpet, Mr. Spooner.
23:58Well, don't just stand there.
23:59Put them in water!
24:00Hey, if they don't come round, Spooner,
24:01can I have them for the cat?
24:02Rigsby!
24:03Let me get a sense of humour!
24:05You wait, Rigsby!
24:06I'll get you!
24:08I'll get you!
24:09I'll get you!
24:10I'll get you!
24:11I'll get you!
24:12I'll get you!
24:13I'll get you!
24:14I'll get you!
24:15I'll get you!
24:16I'll get you!
24:17I'll get you!
24:18I'll get you!
24:19I'll get you!
24:20I'll get you!
24:21I'll get you!
24:22I'll get you!
24:23I'll get you!
24:24I'll get you!
24:25I'll get you!
24:26I'll get you!
24:27I'll get you!
24:28I'll get you!
24:29I'll get you!
24:30I'll get you!
24:31I'll get you!
24:32I'll get you!
24:33I'll get you!
24:34I'll get you!
24:35I'll get you!
24:36I'll get you!
24:37I'll get you!
24:38I'll get you!
24:39I'll get you!
24:40I'll get you!
24:41I'll get you!
24:42I'll get you!
24:43I'll get you!
24:44I'll get you!
24:45I'll get you!
24:46I'll get you!
24:47I'll get you!
24:48I'll get you!
24:49I'll get you!
24:50I'll get you!
24:51I'll get you!
24:52I'll get you!
24:53I'll get you!
24:54I'll get you!
24:55I'll get you!
24:56I'll get you!
24:57I'll get you!
24:58I'll get you!
24:59I'll get you!
25:00I'll get you!
25:01I'll get you!
25:02I'll get you!
25:03I'll get you!
25:04I'll get you!
25:05I'll get you!