Sabrina Carpenter Creates Her Self Portrait

Vanity Fair

"I'm actually a very normal amount of horny." Singer and actress Sabrina Carpenter finds her own gaze as she paints a portrait of herself. From her evolution in music to her journey to self-discovery, watch Sabrina convey her self-perception by breaking down the things that make her who she is today.  Director: Kristen White  Director of Photography: Shirley Chang  Editor: Louis Lalire Talent: Sabrina Carpenter Producer: Madison Coffey Line Producer: Romeeka Powell Associate Producer: Lyla Neely Production Manager: Andressa Pelachi Production Coordinator: Elizabeth Hymes Camera Operator: Jeremy White Gaffer: Niklas Moller Audio Engineer: Michael Guggino Production Assistant: Alex Mitchell, Malaia Simms Post Production Supervisor: Christian Olguin Post Production Coordinator: Scout Alter Supervising Editor: Doug Larsen Assistant Editor: Billy Ward Graphics Supervisor: Ryan Powell Designer: Lea Kichler Animation: Samuel Fuller

Transcript

00:00I think over the last year, I've heard from a lot of people like,

00:03wow, she's just like the horniest girl alive.

00:06You know, because sometimes in my songs, I say some crazy things on stage.

00:11But I'm actually a very normal amount of horny.

00:22Hello, I'm Sabrina Carpenter and today I'm going to be painting my self-portrait.

00:30Drawing for me is the most free-handed pastime activity that I have in my whole life.

00:38Like, I don't really ever think about it.

00:40I don't think about the outcome.

00:41I don't think about what I'm doing before I do it.

00:43I just sort of do it for fun, which I guess, in a sense,

00:46is like the most pure thing that's ever come out of my mouth.

00:48But I really do see it as more just like something I do that makes me happy,

00:52as opposed to something I do with the intention of hoping it turns out great.

00:56I think even this is like probably like a weird version of me that's like

01:00not actually what I look like in the mirror.

01:02I've just always had like light hair, dark eyebrows, blue eyes.

01:07And I didn't realize that that would be the thing that kind of

01:11haunts me for the rest of my life because like my bangs and my dark eyebrows,

01:14like I can't really, even wearing a mask doesn't really do much

01:18if I'm trying to be, you know, incognito.

01:21I think for me right now, you aren't ever really going to fully control

01:25the way that people see you.

01:26That is something I have to reaccept kind of every day.

01:29I'm at a point now where I'm trying to just sort of not take it so seriously.

01:34And the things that people say, just know that these are people that have

01:39very little context on me as an actual person.

01:42So that makes me feel a little bit better.

01:44But if I'm going to be super rude, I'm going to be super rude.

01:47But if I'm going to be super real, like do I like that someone can just take

01:52a photo from the craziest angle on human earth?

01:55No, but because I'm a girl and I'm, you know,

01:58that's what maybe is my least favorite thing about being on tour.

02:01So I'll be like, that's what I look like, but it's a video.

02:05So I'll just be like, no, that was some other girl.

02:08That was my alter ego.

02:09That wasn't me out there.

02:11It hasn't really shifted other than the fact that I think it's really

02:15exciting and heartwarming now that when, you know, people come up to me,

02:18it's because of the songs that I write.

02:20I mean, they're so close to me and they're so personal.

02:22It's like an extension of me.

02:23Whereas, you know, shows and different films I've worked on have,

02:26they're a collaboration of so many different people coming together to create a product

02:30as opposed to just, you know, all the pressure sort of being on me and the words I'm saying.

02:35I've always felt the safest to create when I'm in the recording studio.

02:40Specifically, like I have some favorite studios of mine and they usually have

02:44a very like outdoor essence to them.

02:47I love being close to the outdoors when I'm writing.

02:50It's where I've always just felt kind of the safest to experiment.

02:53At least when you're in the studio, like nothing has to be final.

02:56Nothing has to come out.

02:58So I feel really free to just kind of try things.

03:01The one album that inspired me to really follow my gut in experimenting with genre

03:08and not limiting myself was Lemonade.

03:12Like it really transcended every genre.

03:13She had kind of a little bit of everything in that album.

03:15And that really made me feel like I didn't have to just stay in a box from there on out.

03:20So thanks, Beyoncé.

03:21I love you.

03:25It's a bit of a shit show right now as I'm 24.

03:28A process of making mistakes and not trying to like stay up every night thinking about

03:33those mistakes, but rather just being like this was bound to happen as you are 24 and

03:38give yourself some grace to move on and learn from it and maybe write songs about it.

03:42So I think it's a mixture of that and then a mixture of just trying not to take it all

03:46so seriously and have fun.

03:49And I guess essentially what they say are the times you're going to like look back on

03:52and feel like you were really forming a lot of

03:55So I try to give myself the opportunity to do that.

03:58I try to like make decisions now that, you know, maybe I'd be too afraid to make because

04:03I'm young and I can get away with more.

04:05I'm on the bangs.

04:06This is looking great.

04:08I literally cut my bangs because someone broke my heart and I was just like, I have to do

04:12something.

04:13And I'm not usually one of those people that has to make like rash decisions when their

04:17feelings are hurt.

04:18But that was my like first reaction to it.

04:21But I never wanted to dye my hair because I always really felt comfortable as, you know,

04:25blonde the way I was born.

04:27I really think that the beauty of being this age is some days you can feel like truly borderline

04:36so conceited and obnoxiously confident.

04:39And then all it takes is like, you know, a little bit of self-love and a little bit of

04:45like, you know, a little bit of like, you know, a little bit of like, you know, a little

04:50It takes all it takes is like someone saying one thing that just strikes a chord in you

04:53to be like, I'm actually the ugliest person ever exist.

04:56And then it kind of is a big, you know, flip flop.

04:58But I think for me, I feel like I have better things to worry about than the way that I

05:03look.

05:11Yes, I do feel, yeah, like I'm not gonna lie, like I definitely feel like a little bit more

05:17pressure on like, you know, the words that I choose to say and just in general kind of

05:23like decisions.

05:24But I then also have to think about it on the scale of like, if, you know, the people

05:29that are judging my answers so harshly and critically were put in the same position,

05:34like would they nail it and crush it every time?

05:36Probably not.

05:38So then I feel a little bit better.

05:39I think over the last year, I've heard from a lot of people like, wow, like she's just

05:44like the horniest girl alive, because sometimes in my songs, I say some crazy things on stage.

05:49But I'm actually a very normal amount of horny.

05:52And also just, you know, a lot of it is because I'm able to kind of have fun and play.

05:57And, you know, when I'm doing these live shows, it's just a matter of not taking things too

06:02seriously.

06:03And I love play on words.

06:05And I love funny innuendos.

06:08It's just always been something that makes me laugh.

06:10So yeah, I'm not, I'm not the horniest girl alive, for sure.

06:18A lot of people have careers that I admire for different reasons.

06:21Stevie Nicks is one of my favorite artists.

06:23He's just such a legend.

06:25Margot Robbie is someone I love.

06:27I like the choices that she makes and how she kind of is able to really take her own

06:32choices that she makes and how she kind of is able to really showcase herself and all

06:37her talents in very different ways and produces a lot of the stuff that she makes.

06:40I think that's really impressive and amazing.

06:42Zendaya, I'm obsessed with Zendaya.

06:45And I think that she's always, again, kind of really just remained so true to herself.

06:52I would say in the last few years, especially, like people that have come into my life have

06:55really affected the music that I've made and what I've written about and what has felt

06:59important enough to write about.

07:03I'm actually quitting to become a professional painter in France.

07:11And yeah, I'm only specifically making paintings for the Louvre right now, exclusively.

07:19But I might write another song at some point.

07:23I almost love, like, playing on the idea of like what a pop star is or isn't,

07:28because I think it's so many different things.

07:30But no, I like being a pop star.

07:32I'm not going to lie.

07:33I have so many tricks up my sleeve.

07:36My favorite thing about this time of my life is I feel really, really inspired to just

07:40continue to write and write about the things that confuse me and make me happy and make

07:45me sad and make me excited.

07:46And, you know, I think I felt a lot more comfortable in my own voice after my last album came out.

07:53And just that tour brought me a lot closer to my fans.

07:56And I can just kind of have fun with it now, which is nice.

07:59Honestly, the pandemic sort of did a lot for me, because I just really realized in

08:03that period of time that all of this is very uncertain.

08:07And it makes me happy to write music, regardless of if someone hears it or no one hears it.

08:14Like, I just love writing music because I love it.

08:16And that made me kind of want to just feel a little bit more loose in what I was writing

08:23and not having to worry so much about the aftermath of it all.

08:27More just like, this is what feels honest.

08:29And it felt like a really big weight off my shoulders.

08:32I think my whole thing is I just want to keep surprising myself

08:35and learning that I can do things I didn't know I could.

08:37Like this painting.

08:38I really am not like a painter.

08:40I'm more of a drawer.

08:41So the painting was like a little scary to me.

08:42But this is really therapeutic.

08:45I'm not gonna lie.

08:45I've gotten paint everywhere.

08:47But other than that, like, this is super chill.

08:50I'm done.

08:52Should I sign it?

08:52Voila, question mark.

09:01Do I have to, like, look like that?

09:02Because then they're gonna be like, that looks nothing like her.

09:05So in my head, this is what I look like.

09:09I think that's something that we all need to remember more, though, is like,

09:11these answers are fleeting as I am changing and evolving, like, every two seconds.

09:16Same with everybody, you know?

Category

Transcript

Recommended