My mum your dad - Roger Hawes and Janey Smith tallk to Gay Bolton
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00:00 What's this last year been like for you?
00:02 Mental.
00:03 That's it?
00:03 Yeah.
00:04 It's not real.
00:04 It's only mental.
00:05 Yeah.
00:05 This, yeah, it's been mental.
00:07 Really?
00:08 It's been a year, hasn't it?
00:09 And we did sit quietly the other day and thought, what was that?
00:13 Then you, oh, we did this.
00:14 Yeah.
00:15 And then we went in there and, oh, what about that?
00:18 What about when we did this?
00:19 What's been the high spot for you both?
00:23 I think it sounds corny, but for me, it's just having a boyfriend.
00:26 And then like--
00:26 What about you, Roger?
00:27 Having a girlfriend.
00:28 Oh, he always, yeah, he's taking my lines.
00:33 I bet you get asked this all the time, though, don't you?
00:37 We do, but I think--
00:38 I do, but I don't mind.
00:39 --like, traveling's been wonderful,
00:40 but I'd much prefer to travel with Roger than on my own, you know?
00:44 So yeah, that's what's been lovely.
00:47 Roger, do you live in Stavely or Chesterfield?
00:50 Stavely.
00:50 You're going to stay there, are you?
00:53 Well, we just move in between, but I'm spending more time in West Sussex.
00:59 When I left there this morning, it was 19 degrees.
01:02 And a messy house.
01:04 But I looked on the weather.
01:06 It's going to be like that for the next four days.
01:08 And then you get on the motor, M25, sunshine, opening windows,
01:12 because it's too warm, air conditioning.
01:14 It's not just the weather.
01:15 And then we got on the M1, then you hit Leicester,
01:19 and clouds moved in, and oh, getting near Rome.
01:23 Do you miss being a postman?
01:26 I miss all my mates.
01:28 Yeah, 30 years or more.
01:32 Really?
01:32 Yeah.
01:33 Yeah.
01:33 So yeah, I almost know what we're doing sometimes towards the end.
01:39 No, I've got a lot of good friends, which being just the difference
01:45 of where Jadie lives and I live and seeing each other.
01:48 So I don't get to see a lot of my friends.
01:51 I don't even see enough of my family, to be honest.
01:53 You spend more time down in West Sussex than you do out of Chanel.
01:56 At the moment, yes.
01:57 Only the past couple of weeks out of a year.
02:02 We've been away, so yeah.
02:04 Are you still doing all your travel stuff for the television then?
02:07 Yeah, we've just-- you have to respond to when they talk to you about--
02:15 Where are you going next?
02:16 We don't know.
02:17 We don't know.
02:18 But we are available.
02:20 Very spur of the moment thing, is it?
02:22 It is, yeah.
02:23 Always, yeah.
02:24 You must get exhausted by all the demands on your time, though.
02:28 You do get tired of it, but I'm not-- I'm sure somebody--
02:31 I don't want to hear somebody say, oh, listen to Tim.
02:34 No, yeah, it does get tiring.
02:36 But yeah, like Jadie says, just being together.
02:40 Would you have ever dreamed how much your lives have changed?
02:43 No.
02:43 No.
02:44 No, no.
02:45 It's just unreal.
02:47 Is it?
02:47 Yeah.
02:49 Even something as simple as that, when we walked in this morning's juveniles,
02:55 I walked past, like, it's Dr. Hillary.
02:57 I was like this.
02:59 And it-- just sit, and you're like, oh my.
03:03 Do you find people recognize you wherever you go now?
03:06 Yeah, we do get recognized a lot.
03:08 Yeah.
03:09 Everyone's lovely, and it's not a bad thing.
03:12 It's just nice.
03:14 To be fair, we've never really had a bad situation, have we, where somebody is--
03:20 Not in person.
03:21 No.
03:21 Online trolling's a whole new world, but--
03:23 You always get that.
03:25 Just envious people, aren't they?
03:26 Yeah, it's a ghastly world, that side.
03:28 But I think in person--
03:30 Do you get to respond sometimes?
03:32 Yeah, but I tell him not to.
03:35 No, people are just generally nice, so it's not a problem to talk about it.
03:40 And if you had your time again, would you go back on the program?
03:44 Can't say no.
03:45 It was-- I would say to anybody when they asked--
03:48 they were asking us, what would you say about the new program?
03:52 Yeah, you're going to meet people.
03:54 You're in a safe environment.
03:56 It's in a lovely spot.
03:57 And what you make of it, it's up to you.
04:00 And obviously, we were lucky that we just hit it off, and we just--
04:06 really, we're at that stage now that we're just saying the same thing,
04:11 we're laughing at the same thing.
04:12 Like an old married couple.
04:14 I said that last night.
04:16 I said, why are you laughing?
04:17 What are you laughing at?
04:18 I thought, what have I done?
04:19 And he says, I'm just laughing.
04:21 I said, please tell me what you're laughing at.
04:22 You know when you get married, you have to tell me now you've told me that.
04:25 He wouldn't say.
04:26 And then just before I went to bed, he said,
04:28 I was just laughing that we're like an old married couple, lying here.
04:32 How many of the other couples from the series are still together, then?
04:35 Do you keep in touch with them or not?
04:37 We're in touch with pretty much everyone, but no one's together.
04:42 Aren't they?
04:42 So you're the only ones?
04:44 Yeah.
04:44 Yeah.
04:45 Yeah.
04:45 There was two--
04:47 Two other couples.
04:48 Three of us, three couples that come out.
04:50 We're seeing each other at the time, but that was all out with distance.
04:54 Paul and Natalie, Sharon and Elliot.
04:57 Yeah.
04:57 It was a shame.
04:58 Yeah.
04:59 Because--
05:00 Yeah.
05:00 Always an average view of the program.
05:02 I loved every minute of it.
05:03 Yeah.
05:04 Fantastic.
05:05 I thought-- I think it's brilliant.
05:06 They're currently filming at the moment, I think, so for the next one.
05:11 But yeah.
05:12 So will they invite you back on, do you think, at the end of it to sort of--
05:15 I don't know.
05:16 This is how it can be for you.
05:18 Well, yeah, I think it's--
05:21 I've always said everyone should just go for it, because you never know what's around the corner in life.
05:26 Of course not.
05:27 And if-- I always-- if you just sit at home waiting to meet someone,
05:29 they're not going to knock on your door, are they, and ask you out for dinner.
05:32 So you've just got to get yourself out there.
05:35 The more you think about it, the more unnatural it seems to happen--
05:40 It's really tough.
05:41 --to actually meet somebody that you fit with, and we just-- we do fit.
05:46 Yeah.
05:47 It's just weird.
05:49 Just-- I don't know.
05:50 I'm just--
05:51 It's easy.
05:51 Yeah, look, I wouldn't-- so yeah, I wouldn't like to try and tell somebody else,
05:55 you've got to do this, you've got to do that.
05:56 I think you've just got to--
05:59 I think you have to be open to things, well, don't you, you know, like--
06:04 I think some-- when you get a bit older and you've had things happen to you throughout life,
06:08 and a bit of trauma, or, you know, mistrust issues, everything,
06:13 but I think you've just got to keep going and keep looking, you know, so.
06:18 And for the time being, are you going to stay in your sort of respective counties?
06:22 You're not going to move it together, or--
06:24 No, I mean, my son's back from uni in the summer, because he's at Cardiff.
06:29 My parents are in their 80s, and they're near me, so I still have to take them into account.
06:35 We're back this weekend, it's my daughter's-- she's 30--
06:39 Yeah.
06:40 --on Sunday, so we're back for a big party.
06:42 Is this Jess?
06:43 Jess, yeah, and we've got-- there's quite-- there's a few coming up from the show.
06:48 So there's seven of the kids from the show.
06:50 And Paul, Caroline, and Clayton are coming, yeah.
06:54 So a big family party, then.
06:56 Yeah, yeah, so I wouldn't miss any family, and Jadie travels back with me as well,
07:03 and I'll be there for her and my dad.
07:06 Don't you do miss your brother's birthday?
07:09 Miss my brother's birthday?
07:10 Oh, we do.
07:11 My mum's as well, next weekend.
07:12 Oh, bless you.
07:14 But it's just, you know, my family's very chill.
07:17 Like I say, it's just them and William and my brother,
07:22 but they just want me to be happy.
07:23 Of course, yeah.
07:24 And I think at the end of the day--
07:26 You just have to be a bit malleable and-- yeah, you've just got to--
07:31 It's different.
07:32 It takes on a whole new dynamic, and Roger, obviously, was married for a very long time,
07:35 whereas myself, I've never been married.
07:37 I've never had, like, a life partner, so to speak.
07:40 So for me, it's finding that balance of thinking, well, I still love my friends,
07:46 because they were always there for me.
07:48 They were my family, you know,
07:50 and now I have to take into account this family as well and my own.
07:55 It's a lot to juggle sometimes.
07:57 It is a lot.
07:58 Plus everyone knowing about it too.
08:01 Exactly.
08:02 So, I mean, your romance has sort of played out across and through the nation, isn't it?
08:06 So that must be a lot of--
08:08 Yeah, pressure's on.
08:09 I was going to say, there must be a lot of pressure with that.
08:12 Not really, no.
08:14 There's no pressure on us, but I think--
08:16 I don't think we've really ever fell out yet.
08:19 It's been a year.
08:20 That's fantastic.
08:21 I say I don't argue.
08:22 I don't do drama.
08:23 I'm not interested.
08:24 This lip don't bleed.
08:25 Yeah, yeah.