WHEN Jesse slid into Cassidy's DMs, the pair hit it off and quickly fell in love, but not everyone was happy with their relationship. Cassidy is a trans woman and it's something that Jesse's friends and family struggled with. Jesse explained to Love Don't Judge: "I was brought up around a very masculine family. One thing I was definitely taught was that a natural woman is who you're supposed to be with - and if you're with anybody else, if you're gay, if you're ever with a trans girl, you're going to be out of this family." Online, the couple often receive trolling, with Cassidy admitting: "I've received a whole lot of hate comments being like, 'You'll never be a real woman'". In this episode, we'll see Jesse's friend, Jordan, reveal how he really felt when they got together. Speaking to the duo, he admitted: "I was very apprehensive and shocked." Keen to share their love with the world, Jesse said: "Our message is, don't be scared to embrace who you love."
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00:00 This is Jesse.
00:02 He fell in love with Cassidy.
00:04 - I'm a proud trans woman.
00:06 - Jesse was raised in a strict conservative family.
00:08 - One thing I was definitely taught was a natural woman
00:11 is who you're supposed to be with.
00:13 And if you're with anybody else,
00:14 you're gonna be out of this household
00:15 and out of this family.
00:17 - And their relationship has caused a stir with loved ones.
00:20 - The main misconception that people have is that he's gay.
00:24 - I was very apprehensive.
00:26 - Right.
00:27 - I didn't know that he was open to having a relationship
00:29 with a trans girl.
00:30 - I'm Jesse, and this is my partner Cassidy,
00:36 who's a trans woman.
00:38 - Jesse and I met off of Instagram.
00:42 The first thing I saw was muscles.
00:44 And so I was like, okay.
00:47 - I actually messaged her and I let her know
00:48 that she's beautiful.
00:51 We were about three or four messages in,
00:54 and she said, "Hey, I just wanna let you know
00:56 that I'm sorry if it changes the dynamic of things,
01:00 but I'm a trans woman."
01:01 And I said, "No, no, no, sweetheart.
01:04 You don't have to apologize for that.
01:06 You're just a special kind of woman."
01:08 It was a beautiful moment, and we kicked it off ever since.
01:12 - We faced a lot of judgment
01:17 when we started our relationship.
01:19 I think the main misconception that people have
01:22 with our relationship is that he's gay.
01:26 I've received a whole load of hate comments,
01:31 being like, "You'll never be a woman.
01:33 How dare you?"
01:36 A lot of religious comments, too,
01:39 about how I should kill myself and you're going to hell.
01:43 So this one says, "Sir, lipstick and heels
01:48 doesn't make you a woman.
01:49 You can't change biology.
01:51 You can't change chromosomes.
01:52 You are just an insecure guy who didn't accept his body,
01:55 so you did plastic surgery.
01:57 Keep living in your fantasy."
01:59 It definitely gets to me sometimes,
02:02 but I can't let it affect my day because I'm used to it.
02:06 At the beginning of it, I couldn't help
02:10 but think it was my fault for all the backlash
02:13 that Jelsea was receiving,
02:16 but we persevered through everything,
02:19 and it was something that really made us stronger.
02:24 My upbringing was probably a little more intense
02:28 than the most...
02:30 [ Sighs ]
02:32 I was brought up around a very masculine family,
02:35 very toxic masculinity household.
02:38 I was always taught to act out, be the tough guy.
02:42 Natural woman is who you're supposed to be with,
02:44 and that's it, and if you're with anybody else,
02:46 if you're gay, if you're ever with a trans girl,
02:49 you're going to be out of this household
02:50 and out of this family.
02:52 My friends and family, at first,
02:56 they were shocked because the alpha masculine,
03:00 tatted-up male is now dating a transgender woman.
03:05 My family was worried about their reputation, not mine.
03:09 The whole entire world's going to know my son's gay.
03:12 He's dating a trans girl.
03:15 So we're going to FaceTime Jordan right now.
03:17 This is a best friend of mine who's been through with me
03:20 through all points of my life, so we're going to call him,
03:23 see what he has to say, because he was reluctant
03:26 on our relationship in the beginning.
03:28 [ Line ringing ]
03:31 Jordan, what's up?
03:33 -What's up, brother? How you doing?
03:34 -So I wanted to ask you a couple questions
03:38 about my relationship, because I know it's been a lot.
03:41 How did you first feel about hearing
03:45 that I was dating a woman like Cassidy that's trans?
03:48 -I was, you know, definitely a little shocked and apprehensive.
03:53 It got blown up back here at home,
03:55 and, you know, knowing you my whole life,
03:58 I didn't know that, you know, I didn't see that.
04:01 -One of the first things that probably came out
04:04 was probably, "He's gay."
04:05 -People definitely have that perspective on it.
04:09 I was just very much confused.
04:12 -I was confused, too.
04:13 Cassidy educated me and said, "No, no, no, honey.
04:16 You're straight. Don't you look at me like a woman?"
04:19 I said, "Yeah." She's like, "So where do you find the word 'gay'?"
04:22 And that's when I realized, "Yeah, I'm not gay at all.
04:25 I'm an alpha male that's attracted to femininity,
04:28 and that's exactly what I got right here."
04:31 -What was your first impression of hearing
04:36 that Jesse was dating a trans girl?
04:40 -I didn't know that he was open
04:43 to having a relationship with a trans girl.
04:46 So it was definitely -- it was shocking to me at first.
04:49 It was new for all of us, but when I saw how happy Jesse was,
04:53 that all my transgression went out the window.
04:57 -Yeah.
04:58 -I realized it doesn't matter to me.
05:00 It's what makes Jesse happy.
05:02 -I really appreciate you, Jordan, for seeing me as I am
05:07 and not what other people say about me,
05:11 and what other people project onto me.
05:15 -Like I said, Jesse's happiness is what matters to me.
05:19 -Awesome, Jordan. You're the best.
05:21 -Hey, brother. I appreciate you.
05:23 You know I've loved you since day one,
05:25 and ain't nothing ever gonna change over here.
05:27 -No doubt, bro. Love you, too. -Bye-bye.
05:30 -Peace.
05:31 -It's been amazing seeing my best friends
05:35 eventually come around, and my mother,
05:37 and some of my uncles and aunts.
05:39 It's truly amazing. -And I never had that.
05:41 You know, somebody's family give me that type of love
05:46 and appreciation before.
05:49 I always knew I was a woman.
05:51 I started transitioning when I was 14,
05:56 and at that time, it was not spoken about.
06:00 And I had to do it in the safety and the privacy of my room,
06:06 my bedroom, and that was the only time
06:08 when I got to be myself.
06:10 -I have found it definitely hard to date as a trans woman.
06:17 Guys, most of the time, I don't think is ready
06:22 to put that out there in the world,
06:25 where it's something that they see
06:28 or their family sees as taboo
06:31 or something that's nontraditional,
06:35 and it's been really hard to go through that.
06:39 My family reacted to the relationship,
06:43 I think, more cautious than anything
06:46 from what I've dealt with in the past.
06:49 Relationships with abuse and trauma,
06:52 they were scared.
06:53 They were nervous. They saw his pictures.
06:55 They were like, "Oh, God, a tatted-up, you know, biker."
06:59 They were like, "Cassidy, what are you doing?"
07:01 And I was like, "No, like, you have to meet him.
07:03 Like, you have to, you know, see him and feel his energy."
07:08 ♪♪
07:10 -Cassidy's changed my life for the better
07:12 because she is slowly helping remove the hate
07:16 that's been instilled in me since a kid.
07:18 -Just knowing that I have somebody
07:20 that fully supports me,
07:21 no matter what I do, he's always there for me.
07:24 -Our message is, don't be scared to embrace who you love,
07:29 because if I was still scared to let it out to this world,
07:32 I would be hiding everything that is so beautiful about us,
07:36 but instead, I let it out there.
07:38 -Throughout our hardships and throughout us being judged
07:42 so much in our relationships,
07:44 we want to show that it's still possible
07:48 to live a happy relationship
07:50 and not even care about what people think.
07:53 ♪♪
07:59 ♪♪
08:05 ♪♪