Goofy - How to Sleep (1953)
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FunTranscript
00:00 ♪ ♪
00:29 Do you know that you spend about a third of your life in bed?
00:33 Since the beginning of time,
00:35 man has always had the problem of sleeping.
00:39 In the dark ages,
00:43 man tried to sleep on bare stone.
00:47 Seeking better methods,
00:49 he tried hay.
00:51 [sneezes]
00:53 The next great advance was wood.
00:56 But the termites kept him awake.
00:59 And finally, he tried metal.
01:02 [sneezes]
01:05 Out of which evolved the form-fitting
01:10 inner spring mattress of today.
01:13 Man has learned there are various ways to attain sleep.
01:18 He can be walked to sleep.
01:21 You just won't believe what happened to the bridge club.
01:24 I know what you'll think. George, are you listening?
01:27 [hums]
01:30 Squawk to sleep.
01:32 [hums]
01:35 Rock to sleep.
01:37 And sock to sleep.
01:43 [sneezes]
01:45 Contrary to popular belief,
01:49 research shows people do not sleep like logs.
01:53 They sleep like the frog.
01:56 [snores]
01:59 The dog.
02:03 [laughs]
02:06 Like the ostrich.
02:10 [snores]
02:11 The mole.
02:13 The bear.
02:17 [snores]
02:21 [growls]
02:23 And like the owl.
02:25 [howls]
02:28 Today, more and more people find it increasingly difficult
02:35 to obtain a good night's sleep.
02:38 They are the victims of today's mad pace of existence.
02:44 [alarm blaring]
02:46 While others perform their daily toil,
02:49 they sleep too hard at work...
02:51 Deep!
02:52 And work too hard at sleep.
02:54 Go home and sleep on your own time!
02:57 Asleep on his feet.
03:00 [alarm blaring]
03:03 Hardly able to stay awake long enough to go to bed.
03:09 This man has a problem.
03:14 For once having made his bed,
03:17 he can't sleep in it.
03:19 [screams]
03:21 However, if one scientifically approaches the sleeping problem,
03:26 like adjusting bedding,
03:29 science has discovered that fresh air is beneficial to health,
03:32 and thus we find the properly ventilated room most conducive to breathing,
03:36 allowing the lungs and other respiratory organs
03:39 to assimilate and perform to the maximum efficiency.
03:42 However, if the temperature should fall below
03:45 the prerequisites of bodily comfort,
03:48 then an electric blanket makes one as warm as toast.
03:52 Hot milk is very soothing.
04:01 And, of course, counting sheep to sleep never fails.
04:09 One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten...
04:14 [yells]
04:15 Stampede!
04:17 [screams]
04:18 Always on the march, science isn't asleep on the job.
04:28 Today, science has given man a chance to sleep as he's never slept before.
04:34 Using the yawn-inducing plaque as a starter,
04:39 the anti-snore chin strap,
04:42 ear stoppers,
04:44 eye shade and head warmer,
04:46 and the anti-toss-and-turn suit,
04:49 the sleeper is completely outfitted,
04:52 gently tucked into bed,
04:55 and softly rocked by the mattress pulsating machine.
04:59 Dreamy music soothes each jangled nerve
05:04 as a seismographic chart gives science an insight of the subject's reaction.
05:10 [snoring]
05:12 This sensitive machine records electrical waves sent out by the brain.
05:28 Every minute detail is transcribed as each tiny thought takes shape.
05:35 [crash]
05:36 [yells]
05:38 Thus, science proves that dreams definitely affect the subconscious mind.
05:45 Science approaches the problem with renewed vigor.
05:52 Science calls on every available resource,
05:56 delving deeply into the occult
05:59 [beeping]
06:01 and listening Mother Nature's help.
06:03 Every possibility is scientifically approached.
06:07 Science leaves nothing to chance.
06:11 Hmm.
06:13 Constant research and ingenuity plus know-how
06:18 enables science to come up with the answer to man's sleeping problem.
06:22 [crash]
06:23 And so today, as it must to all men,
06:26 sleep came to Mr. Geep.
06:28 Science marches on.
06:31 [music]
06:39 you