John Rich | Barstool Rundown
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00:00 (upbeat music)
00:02 - All right, rundown.
00:04 Today, myself, Dana, Ken, Jack,
00:07 but-- - The big three.
00:09 - It's of course, everyone's--
00:11 - The big three. - Feeding for this content.
00:13 - Between us, we're averaging a double-double.
00:14 - That is true. - In our basketball league.
00:16 - That is true.
00:17 Are we actually? - All three of our stats
00:18 combined? - No, I think it would go down.
00:20 - It would go down a little bit?
00:21 (laughing)
00:22 I think you're probably right.
00:24 No thanks to you.
00:25 - All right, today's episode is brought to you
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00:41 - Did I get some of that, actually?
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01:00 - Who said gym junkies?
01:01 Like, that was a player.
01:02 That sounds like a quarterback from the '50s or something.
01:04 - Wow. - I still don't know why
01:05 we trust Marty to do ad reads.
01:07 - Wow. - Because he can't read,
01:08 John Rich. - Yeah.
01:10 - Peach mango's delicious. - It's really good.
01:12 - Oh my God, with zero sugar. - We keep signing up Marty
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01:41 It's nice when you taste something,
01:43 you're like, oh wow, it's actually--
01:44 - Yeah, it's very good.
01:46 - Opening night, NBA, poor Zingas,
01:49 everyone thinks the Celtics is gonna be like their savior,
01:51 which he's not, but good game for him last game.
01:54 - Nobody said that.
01:55 - Everyone did.
01:55 - Oh, every Celtics fan I know.
01:56 - Every Celtics fan thinks that's poor Zingas.
01:58 - I'm a diehard Celtics fan and I haven't thought
02:00 that for a second.
02:01 - Not a second?
02:02 - I think he's a huge addition, but he's also--
02:05 - He's physically large.
02:06 - He's fucking gonna get hurt,
02:07 and when he does get hurt, everyone's gonna ask
02:10 for his fucking head on a stake,
02:12 and if he does get hurt, we don't have any depth.
02:15 We have Peyton Pritchard's our seventh man,
02:18 Al Horford's our sixth man, and after that, nothing.
02:21 - You have no depth.
02:22 - Sam Houser, who shout out Sam Houser, he knows who I am.
02:26 - Nice.
02:27 - I saw him at the Pats game and he said, "Hey, I know you."
02:29 - Good for you.
02:30 - So it's cool, but he's not a--
02:32 - He's not a guy.
02:33 - He's not a guy.
02:34 - He's the 14th guy on the bench.
02:35 - Exactly.
02:36 But poor Zingas, he balled out 30 points,
02:39 he was banging threes in the fucking garden.
02:42 - That's crazy, first Celtics ever with 30 point debut.
02:45 - Yeah.
02:46 - Really?
02:47 - You'll love to see it.
02:48 - Also, he's not gonna play that well,
02:49 he was against the Knicks, everyone hated him at one point.
02:52 - But you could tell he was having fun, he was smiling.
02:55 He was in Washington last year,
02:57 and I think he hated his life, anybody who was playing.
02:58 - And he went to play as the Wizards.
03:00 I actually think it helped him, though,
03:02 because he averaged so much.
03:03 - He had the best year of his career.
03:05 - He sucked so much he could do whatever.
03:06 - That was like Russell Rusko when he was there,
03:08 averaging a triple-double with ease.
03:10 - Yeah.
03:10 - I mean, he's huge, he's a fucking seven-foot-three guy,
03:14 he had four blocks last night,
03:15 that's what we need down there.
03:17 I keep saying we like I'm on the team.
03:19 - I agree with we, I'm a we guy.
03:21 - But I don't think he's any type of savior.
03:23 You have to stay healthy, I think Drew Holiday
03:26 is more important than him when it's all said and done.
03:28 - You barely beat the Knicks, that's good, yeah.
03:31 - They should've probably lost,
03:32 they were down six with like two minutes left, but.
03:36 - I didn't watch how Drew did.
03:37 - Drew, he didn't, I mean, he played Drew Holiday ball.
03:40 He played defensively, he scored like nine points,
03:42 that's fine, we don't need him to score.
03:44 Again, it's depth, it's depth, it's depth.
03:46 - So you got yourself another Marcus Smart, that's good.
03:48 - Better Marcus Smart.
03:49 - Oh, I thought he was your savior.
03:51 - He wasn't.
03:52 - Who is saying this?
03:53 - Every Boston fan.
03:54 - You know what you do?
03:55 You see one idiot with a fucking banner 18
03:58 in their profile picture, you say that's all Celtics.
04:00 - Celtics fans would jerk off Marcus Smart.
04:04 - I almost cried when he left.
04:05 - There you go.
04:06 - See, there you go.
04:07 - But no, Drew Holiday is our guy now.
04:09 - Well, that's before we got Drew Holiday.
04:11 When we didn't have him, and I'm like,
04:12 oh, who the fuck is gonna be like our best defender,
04:15 Derek White, whatever, yeah, it was a little sad.
04:17 Now it's all coming together.
04:19 The fucking Knicks, they're good.
04:20 - I mean, I'm disappointed in White, man.
04:22 I'm disappointed in him.
04:23 He should have kept the hairline.
04:26 - No, the hairline was.
04:27 - You gotta, you know, as people with the hairlines.
04:30 - The hairline is tough.
04:31 - Don't bick it, don't do it.
04:33 Save it till you have it, save it until it's all gone.
04:36 - What about when you gotta go to events
04:40 and then all of a sudden, it's pshh.
04:41 - I go to events and my hair, my hair don't move.
04:45 I spray so much hairspray, if there's a piece of wind
04:48 coming, I could be in a hurricane, my hair will stay.
04:50 - I saw a video, is the video, is it out yet?
04:53 - Yes, that was in bad lighting and my hair was not done.
04:56 I was wearing a hat.
04:57 - Ah.
04:58 - Yeah, you know what? - It didn't look good, Mark.
04:59 - I want everyone making fun of my hairline, show me yours.
05:02 Okay, everyone.
05:03 - It's true, there's people that call us fat
05:05 and ugly and bald, they probably don't have a profile picture.
05:08 - Most people should change their profile picture
05:10 before they come at us 'cause it's always,
05:12 I can see you.
05:13 - I think that's an Elon rule he's like working towards,
05:15 is like you have to be, that's the verification process,
05:18 but still.
05:19 Never made sense why you don't just have to put
05:20 your driver's license to make a Twitter account,
05:22 made no sense to me ever.
05:24 But, that's besides the point.
05:27 Next, Wim Beniano, he was in foul trouble a lot.
05:30 My Dallas Mavericks.
05:31 - Can we talk about this take he has?
05:33 - I have the Dallas Mavericks are gonna win
05:35 the championship.
05:36 - You're not fucking lying.
05:37 - Well, they're 1-0, so they're on pace to win.
05:39 - You realistically do not think that, obviously,
05:42 but you think they're going to be one of the best teams
05:44 in the West.
05:45 - Yes, I do.
05:46 - That's ridiculous.
05:47 - Did you see the end of that game?
05:47 - Yes, I watched the whole thing.
05:49 - When Kyrie and Luka are on together, they can't stop.
05:52 - They were playing one of the worst teams in the NBA.
05:55 - Oh, every team they played, they barely won.
05:58 - Okay, wait 'til they beat the Suns, it's gonna be easy.
06:00 They played great.
06:01 Derek Lively, I got laughed at.
06:04 I got laughed at in the car by Derek Lively,
06:05 he was unbelievable.
06:06 - I was wrong about Derek Lively, I thought,
06:08 since he was not good at Duke, and people are gassing him up,
06:13 like, I didn't think he was gonna be good, he was unreal.
06:14 - He's unbelievable.
06:15 - But he also didn't do it, he was all lobs
06:17 and put backs, like, I can do that.
06:19 - No, you can't.
06:20 - It's Billy Football Ball.
06:21 - You can't do lobs in alley-oops.
06:22 - It's Billy Football Ball.
06:23 - He's literally all, he's good for alley-oops,
06:25 that's all he did.
06:26 - He is good for what Luka needs, he needs a big man
06:30 that can roll and dunk and catch lobs.
06:32 - And not shoot ever, he doesn't shoot.
06:35 - You know what I saw?
06:36 I saw a stat that Zion has only played 115 games
06:38 across five seasons.
06:40 That's fucking insane.
06:41 - That makes sense.
06:41 - And when he does play, he's really good,
06:43 but he's a fat fuck.
06:44 - Last night, he was great.
06:46 I never understood the physics of him.
06:48 - Yeah, he's a specimen.
06:49 - He's a thick boy and he jumps higher than anyone.
06:52 How does that work?
06:53 - Like, 6'6", I'm rebounding 7'3".
06:54 - That's kinda like me.
06:56 - Yeah, I don't know about that.
06:57 - You're almost like me.
06:58 - You have one thing in common with him,
06:59 you're overeating and that's it.
07:01 - We'll talk about it afterwards,
07:04 but the picture last night that Clemert tweeted,
07:07 everyone was saying Billy looked fatter than me.
07:09 - Ooh.
07:10 - We'll get to that after.
07:11 - It was John Rich looks fucking scary
07:13 and Dana looks skinnier than Billy.
07:15 - We'll get to it.
07:16 - Okay, we'll get to that one.
07:18 - But yeah, that's the NBA game one.
07:21 - Okay, can you explain this Michigan thing to me
07:23 like I'm an idiot 'cause I don't--
07:24 - Okay, really--
07:24 - I'm out of the loop on it.
07:25 - Really quick.
07:26 - Very out of the loop.
07:27 - Michigan is, allegedly but not allegedly
07:30 'cause I kinda know, was sending a guy
07:33 on the coaching staff, it was like a lower level guy,
07:36 opposing Big Ten games and videotaping their sidelines
07:41 during the game.
07:42 - How do you regulate that?
07:44 Why does every team not do that?
07:45 - So supposedly you're not allowed to
07:47 because there's teams like, really like, sorry,
07:51 Bowling Green, where I can't afford to send people
07:54 in flights and all this stuff.
07:56 - Okay, it's your money.
07:57 - That was the only thing I could think of
07:58 off the top of my head and it was you.
08:00 So that's why they made this rule supposedly
08:03 and now they're saying that this kid,
08:06 well first of all, he wrote a 600 page manifesto.
08:10 - You never want a manifesto out there.
08:12 - We said I don't think a manifesto--
08:13 - Bad word.
08:13 - He's ever not been a crazy person with a manifesto.
08:16 - Yeah, that's a crazy person type of thing to write.
08:18 - And so this guy supposedly was filming him
08:20 and there's like some, ever since they've done this,
08:24 Michigan's been like, unbelievable.
08:26 Supposedly they've seen them like,
08:29 the guy talking to the defensive coordinator
08:31 being like, hey, look, this is it.
08:32 And all the Michigan guys are going like this
08:34 on the field to change that they know the play.
08:37 - This is one of those things I'm just, I'm out.
08:40 - Too much.
08:41 - I don't care.
08:42 - I don't care, I don't wanna--
08:43 - But then you have--
08:44 - I'm just out.
08:45 - You have Dion that said like,
08:46 you can mail me the plays, you still have to stop it.
08:49 Like that's my take on steroids.
08:50 You can take steroids, you gotta still hit
08:53 a 97 mile an hour fastball.
08:54 - Mm, that's true.
08:55 - It's, no matter what, you can cheat.
08:58 Like the Astros was a little different
08:59 because it was supposedly in game,
09:02 but like the Astros was in game telling you
09:04 fastball's coming, curveball's coming right now.
09:06 - This is just one of those things where it's like,
09:07 you know, our brains don't do too well
09:10 with too much information, this is too messy for me.
09:12 - That's awesome, but this is why College Football
09:14 is the best 'cause now like when Michigan plays
09:16 Ohio State and Ohio State loses,
09:18 there'll be so many excuses being like,
09:20 they knew the plays, all this shit.
09:22 - The result, either way, is going to have like people--
09:26 - Either way, yeah.
09:27 And also, if I know Dave, he'll be on the Ohio State,
09:31 at the Ohio State game today, just on Saturday,
09:34 like this, with like an old camcorder,
09:37 just filming Ohio State's sidewalk.
09:39 - That'd be funny.
09:40 It's built--
09:40 - They're going, the College Football show's at,
09:42 Wisconsin, Ohio State.
09:43 - You should absolutely be there.
09:44 - So I think that he should be there.
09:45 - He should be there with the funniest looking camera
09:47 that's ever existed, like, nah.
09:48 - He should dress like he went to the Super Bowl
09:50 and have like, the one like Frank the Tank used to fucking.
09:53 - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
09:54 (laughing)
09:55 - He said he's gonna do it, right, on Pick 'Em?
09:56 - Oh, I haven't watched Pick 'Em.
09:57 - He was talking about it, it sounded like he wants to do it.
09:59 - If he's there, he might as well, it'd be so funny.
10:02 Like, imagine Dave gets like Michigan,
10:03 like a strike against Michigan.
10:05 - They say someone on the staff, like,
10:06 what's preventing just a fan from doing that?
10:08 Just recording--
10:09 - I just don't understand.
10:10 - You can't regulate that.
10:12 - I don't fucking get it.
10:13 - You could have anyone to send in shit,
10:16 I don't get it either, but I do,
10:18 I said that football teams change their signs every week.
10:23 And people on, obviously, Twitter are all coaches
10:25 and said that's not true, but if you didn't do that,
10:28 if you watch film, can't you see the coaches' signs?
10:31 Like, you're watching all 22?
10:32 - Yeah, yeah.
10:33 - I don't get, that's why I don't understand it completely.
10:36 But like, when you watch film, you know their formations,
10:38 you're not stopping that play
10:39 when you know that play's coming.
10:40 - It's really, once you get into these,
10:41 in this level of college football,
10:42 and D1, all those teams, realistically,
10:44 except for Bowling Green, can really just afford
10:46 to get some way, some way they can get the signs, right?
10:49 - The other thing that they're saying
10:50 is that this Michigan kid was tipping off, like,
10:54 other teams to help their way into the college football,
10:57 so like, the college football playoffs.
10:58 So like, last year, they said that they gave it
11:00 to South Carolina, and I think this--
11:03 - Oh, one, then they bet on South Carolina?
11:04 - Might have been Big T, might have been Big T saying this,
11:06 but gave it to South Carolina,
11:08 'cause Tennessee was undefeated at the point or something,
11:11 and then South Carolina beat them,
11:13 and they're saying they gave South Carolina--
11:15 - Then Tennessee should have stole their signs.
11:16 - I say, if you're lying, or you're cheating,
11:18 or something in football, you're not gonna tell other people,
11:21 'cause then it's gonna get out.
11:22 - Yeah.
11:23 - I'm gonna be honest, I'm just tuning this out.
11:26 - That's exactly what you're supposed to do.
11:28 - Because it's so, it's just, I don't get it.
11:31 So, you guys talk about--
11:32 - Explain it to all teams, that's what it's for,
11:34 explain it to all teams.
11:35 - And I still don't understand.
11:36 - You also don't fully understand.
11:38 You don't have to fully understand either,
11:39 to be making it harder for us.
11:40 - No, Big Ed told me everything on Pick Central.
11:43 - Yeah, but he's biased also.
11:45 - But yeah, no, I just don't understand
11:47 why it's such a big deal,
11:49 but I also, I guess knowing their place is a big deal.
11:52 I guess so.
11:53 - Well, and if you're afraid of someone
11:54 stealing your place, steal their place.
11:55 - Also, do an audible, I don't know.
11:58 - Or find a way to circumvent it,
12:00 like a nude mic in the helmet or some shit,
12:03 or I don't know.
12:03 - Well, that's what the solution is.
12:05 Matt Rule said that, it was like,
12:07 why aren't we having microphones in the quarterback's helmets
12:10 'cause that's the solution of everything.
12:14 You give the quarterback three plays,
12:16 and he picks, and you go.
12:18 - That's the NCAA, they're a corrupt organization.
12:20 - Exactly.
12:21 - The thing is, they have no power anymore.
12:22 They're beginning to be like nothing.
12:24 They're gonna be gone soon.
12:26 - I try to blame NIL for this.
12:28 - Yeah, and the thing is, NCAA is just like,
12:32 they're not gonna do anything to Michigan.
12:33 Who cares, just let it go.
12:35 Next topic, the Beatles are releasing their last song ever
12:40 from one week, ever one week from today.
12:43 - Can't read.
12:44 - I'm gonna be completely transparent and honest.
12:45 I thought the Beatles were dead.
12:47 - They're dead.
12:50 - Are they all dead?
12:51 - No, no, McCartney's still kicking.
12:54 - George Harrison and John Lennon, very dead.
12:57 - So do they have fill-ins?
12:58 - No, they just, I don't think, do concerts anymore.
13:01 - Listen, we don't care about the--
13:03 - On account of the dead guys.
13:04 - I don't give a shit about the Beatles.
13:06 - Clemmer was four, like 18 at their concerts,
13:08 so it doesn't lie.
13:10 Clemmer!
13:11 - Can you ask him--
13:14 - There is one song I like.
13:15 - I'd like to know if he was around for the Beatles.
13:17 - No, he was born in '88.
13:19 - I definitely like some of their--
13:21 Hey Jude.
13:22 - Hey Jude, yes.
13:23 - I watched the Beatles movie.
13:25 - Good documentary.
13:26 - No.
13:27 - Are you talking about Across the Universe?
13:27 - Not that movie.
13:29 The one where the guy gets hit by a car
13:31 and pretends he's the Beatles.
13:31 - Oh, yesterday.
13:32 - I was killed for this, by the way.
13:34 - Yesterday, yeah.
13:34 - Saying we don't care about the Beatles?
13:36 - No, I don't even think it's like a I don't care thing.
13:38 It's just like--
13:39 - It's just, it wasn't our time.
13:40 Like I get, yeah, they're a historical,
13:42 great group, the Beatles.
13:44 Two of them are dead, and now is that disrespectful
13:46 to the dead, you doing the new songs?
13:48 - Well, what happened, they found--
13:50 - A demo tape.
13:50 - Yeah, they found an old tape.
13:51 - I was up in heaven, walking down,
13:53 like where the fuck is my music?
13:55 - Oh, fucking, Paul McCartney thinks he,
13:58 well, who, what, Ringo's still alive?
14:00 - Ringo's kicking.
14:01 - Let me talk to Ringo.
14:01 It's a little disrespectful to John Lennon?
14:03 - People are very disrespectful to Ringo Starr, too.
14:05 - John Lennon's dead.
14:06 - John Lennon's been dead for fucking decades, correct?
14:09 - Yeah, since 1980.
14:10 - Yoko Ono.
14:11 - Yoko Ono was his wife, yeah.
14:13 - You're just saying words, man.
14:14 - Yeah.
14:15 - You're just like saying words,
14:16 and hopefully Ken Jack can say it more.
14:17 - He got shot outside of a hotel in New York.
14:18 - Got shot outside of the tool, the Chicago song.
14:20 - Yeah, John Lennon died in 1980, it's 2023.
14:23 I'm not gonna be like, I can't wait for the Beatles song.
14:26 I'll listen to it, probably.
14:27 Nah, I won't.
14:28 - They need a new name.
14:29 - The Beatles?
14:30 - No, I don't think they need a new name.
14:31 That's been the craziest fucking thing you've ever said.
14:33 - That's probably one of the best.
14:34 - I'm saying if John Lennon's gone, they need a new name.
14:38 - But other bands don't do that either.
14:40 - I don't know what I'm saying.
14:41 - They're single.
14:41 - I'm just trying to say.
14:42 - No, they have his voice, though.
14:43 They have an old--
14:44 - That's been said, so it's done.
14:45 - It's a demo.
14:46 - They have an old John Lennon tape that they found.
14:48 - Yeah.
14:48 - And then they remastered it.
14:49 So John Lennon is singing on it.
14:50 - That's what I'm saying about like, Juice WRLD.
14:53 They're like, he has, there's like two albums worth,
14:55 which Juice WRLD's fantastic, but like,
14:57 they're saying like, I always find it weird
15:00 when people die and then they're like,
15:02 oh, we should release their song.
15:03 'Cause it's like, I don't know.
15:06 I think it's a little odd, don't you think?
15:07 - Eh, I got nothing on this.
15:10 - You don't like Aaron?
15:11 - I don't think you have anything on him.
15:12 - The last two, I have nothing.
15:14 - Well, you said they should change the name from The Beatles.
15:16 - You get me to leave the plug, I'll fucking speak.
15:18 - All right, you could go for that one.
15:20 Next one, next topic we got here is Jamal Bowman,
15:24 US representative pleads guilty to pulling a fire alarm
15:28 before crucial government funding vote.
15:30 - Smart.
15:31 - I don't know anything about this man,
15:33 don't know who he is, I'd vote for him right now.
15:36 - Can I admit something?
15:38 I pulled the fire alarm accidentally in middle school.
15:40 - I was gonna say, I think everyone knows someone
15:41 that pulled a fire alarm.
15:42 - Like, actually accidentally, like 100%.
15:44 - You literally can't accidentally do it.
15:46 It's so hard to accidentally.
15:47 - When you guys, did you guys do like,
15:48 band or orchestra in like, middle school, whatever?
15:50 - No, I wasn't. - I was in chorus.
15:51 - So like, we had to practice before school started
15:54 and like, it's January, I'm in like, sixth grade.
15:57 I go and we do the whole thing and like,
15:59 everyone's starting to come in,
16:00 it's freezing cold from outside.
16:01 And I'm putting on my sweatshirt,
16:03 I just put my elbow through the sleeve
16:04 and I hit the thing and there's no cover on it.
16:07 So it's just spring loaded, you hit it, goes up,
16:09 fire alarm goes off, everyone has to go back outside
16:11 in the freezing cold and I just go out there with them
16:13 and I just hear them saying,
16:14 "I'm gonna fucking kill whoever do this."
16:15 Like all these eighth graders and shit.
16:16 - This guy, he's delivering.
16:17 - That's a fire alarm guy, that's a fire alarm.
16:19 - So he's about to lose and he just went like this?
16:22 - Yeah, yeah. - On the red.
16:23 - I'm not a politics guy, I'd vote for him for president.
16:26 - President right now.
16:27 I don't even know, I forgot his name already,
16:29 but he's president.
16:30 - I respect that. - Yes, what a move.
16:32 - That's not even like trying to hide,
16:34 he's not even like this, like going.
16:36 - Like backwards, yeah.
16:36 - He's just, great move.
16:39 More people should do this when--
16:41 - Things go wrong? - When things go wrong.
16:42 - I wish he's pleaded not guilty
16:45 and that picture came out.
16:46 - If I had a fire alarm in my apartment
16:47 and like, I'm losing an argument, just like,
16:48 oh, we gotta go. - He didn't get arrested
16:50 or anything, did he?
16:51 No, he's paying a fine.
16:53 - It's very illegal to do that.
16:55 - To pull a fire, yeah, 'cause then the fire department
16:57 has to come and turn it off.
16:59 - Yeah, but he nudged it, you know?
17:02 He nudged it with his-- - He fell forward.
17:04 - Wait, his quote was, "What I did was against DC law.
17:08 "As I said from the very beginning,
17:09 "I was not trying to disrupt any congressional proceedings.
17:12 "I'm glad the investigator yielded."
17:14 - But if you say you did it against DC law,
17:15 you're saying you did it on purpose.
17:17 - So, what were you trying-- - Deny, deny, deny.
17:19 - What was the reason to not, to do it then?
17:21 - He denied. - He says it was accidental,
17:23 I think. - Yeah, but he says
17:23 it was accidental, but then he says
17:24 what he did was against the law.
17:25 - That's so wrong.
17:26 - I let you go to the grave with your lie.
17:29 - That's when people say they get hacked
17:30 and it's like, dude, you didn't get it.
17:32 - Yeah. - That's awesome.
17:34 - I love that, yeah, I would vote for him today.
17:37 - There usually was, there really was.
17:39 So you were the kid that everyone was talking about
17:41 that pulled the fire alarm.
17:42 - Oh, and they wouldn't let me,
17:42 so like, I go to the principal's office
17:44 and he tells me, he's like, yeah, I believe you,
17:45 like, it's no big deal.
17:46 He's like, you wanna go back to class
17:47 or you want your mom to pick you up?
17:48 And I was like, I was so afraid,
17:49 I was just like, let me go back to class.
17:51 When you are walked in that door for that period
17:53 and everyone just upstairs bullets into me,
17:55 it was the most uncomfortable--
17:56 - I would've stood up 'cause every time
17:57 there was a fire, Joe, it was the best,
17:59 like, you gotta have a class.
17:59 - It was fucking freezing cold.
18:01 And it was everyone just got to school.
18:01 - You see, when you're in middle school,
18:02 you get to see all your little homies
18:04 and like, maybe your childhood crush back then,
18:07 you see 'em outside.
18:07 - But they had already been seeing each other,
18:09 they're waiting outside to go in
18:10 and it was like fucking 20 degrees outside.
18:12 - Yeah, but it was an accident.
18:15 - It wasn't, no one believed that, ever.
18:18 - Shout out to Jamal Bowman.
18:20 If you're watching this, which I know you are,
18:23 run for president.
18:24 - You got our votes.
18:24 - We got you.
18:25 - We got you three votes right here.
18:27 - Dana, take this one away 'cause I don't--
18:29 - No, no, no, I--
18:31 - Pimping out his wife again.
18:32 - You can introduce it.
18:34 - You said you got it, go.
18:35 - I don't got it, I'm just saying.
18:37 - Introduce it.
18:37 - They're geniuses, Adam 22 and Lena the Plug.
18:40 They went viral earlier this year,
18:42 you're the host, you say it.
18:43 - Go, you're already doing it.
18:45 - They went viral earlier this year
18:46 for having her star in a blacked porno
18:49 and they just put out another video of Lena
18:51 sitting on a couch surrounded by five guys
18:53 with Adam 22 talking to the microphone saying,
18:55 "There's a lot here to be excited about,
18:57 "I think this could be very positive for our society."
18:59 - You don't have to be Anchorman and read that.
19:02 - I--
19:03 - You just tell it.
19:04 - Let's see the picture.
19:05 - They are business.
19:08 - Business people.
19:09 - Very savvy business people.
19:10 He acts like he, you know, when he's a cuck
19:14 and all that shit, that it's all poor me.
19:17 He loves it, he fucking loves it.
19:19 He's making millions off of this stuff.
19:20 - Hasn't he also fucked like a million women doing this show?
19:22 - Yes, so he fucks like the hottest porn stars
19:26 and she just has to have sex with a couple people,
19:30 they're making millions of dollars.
19:31 - Yeah, he's a fucking joke to the world, but he's rich.
19:36 They're both rich.
19:38 - He's fucking like 5,000 different women.
19:39 - Yes.
19:40 - It's one of those things, right, that ain't for me,
19:41 but that lifestyle ain't for me.
19:43 - Yeah, it's not for most people, but for them--
19:47 - They're making money.
19:47 - They're making a ton of money.
19:48 - I had no idea he was a porn star for a very long time.
19:50 - I thought he was a basketball player.
19:51 - I thought he was the no jumper guy,
19:53 and I was like, oh, this is basketball pot.
19:54 - No jumper I thought was a bad NBA player.
19:56 - Me too.
19:57 - It's a rap pot.
19:58 - And then all of a sudden all the rappers
19:59 are like literally pulling out guns on each other.
20:01 - Oh, Joe, I don't think I'm gonna enjoy this.
20:05 - Just 'cause that's how simple we are?
20:06 There's a basketball in the logo right now?
20:08 - No jumper too?
20:09 - It's no jumper.
20:10 - You'd be like that's--
20:10 - That's mislabelment.
20:11 - I think that's--
20:12 - Misrepresentation.
20:13 - Yes, advertising.
20:15 - Can I say something separate off of this?
20:17 Tattoos and porn I can't do.
20:21 - Oh, I'm kind of with that.
20:23 - I can't do, I don't know why.
20:25 Second I see tattoos, I'm out.
20:27 - I already know that you're,
20:28 I don't know why I know this,
20:29 but I know that you only watch amateur porn.
20:31 - Amateur porn, Dancing Bear.
20:34 - Fucking Dancing Bear again.
20:35 You act like everyone knew what that was
20:36 the first time you said that.
20:37 - Dancing Bear, I, every time I'm in front of a camera
20:39 I somehow talk about Dancing Bear.
20:41 If you are a horny person and you need
20:44 to get your fucking rocks off, look at Dancing Bear, okay?
20:49 It's underrated, not a whole lot of people
20:52 are talking about it.
20:53 - You talk about it a lot.
20:55 - If Glunnyballs approves, it's good shit.
21:00 Anyways, I'm not a tattoo guy.
21:02 And he, you know, Leonardo Diplog I think has tattoos,
21:05 he's got tattoos, I'm out.
21:07 But, good for them, they're making a lot of money.
21:09 - Ton of money, whole lot of money.
21:11 I just couldn't, again, not for me.
21:12 - Do you disagree?
21:15 - I have no idea, this is, when you're in Michigan
21:18 I don't know what's going on here.
21:20 I have no idea.
21:21 - Okay, so this guy and his wife.
21:23 - I don't need an explanation,
21:24 I could probably figure it out, but I just,
21:26 I'm so out on that side.
21:28 - They're like so viral.
21:29 - Yeah.
21:30 - I'm clueless, you know I stay in my own lane
21:32 and I get out of my lane, I get too crazy.
21:35 - Yeah, you get too confused, yeah.
21:37 - Aftershow, I was thinking about this,
21:40 I think that our Barstow basketball team
21:42 is like becoming a documentary about the Dream Team.
21:47 - We're good.
21:48 - We, everyone was probably like,
21:49 oh, this roster's gonna suck, we're all suck.
21:53 We're undefeated.
21:55 - Yeah, we are undefeated.
21:56 - It's a tie against two girls.
21:57 - At first I was like--
21:58 - It's a tie against two girls.
21:59 - Yeah.
21:59 - What, we're feminists.
22:00 - Yeah.
22:01 - At first--
22:02 - They were bodying us, by the way,
22:03 those women are crush.
22:04 - Yeah, very good.
22:04 - Yeah, we treated them exactly how they would treat us.
22:07 - No, that's not true.
22:08 They definitely treated, they mistreated us way more
22:09 than they mistreated them.
22:10 - Yeah, they were meaner, they were way meaner than us.
22:12 - I was first, I was like,
22:14 let's keep the results a secret.
22:15 Now I don't give a fuck, we're 2-0 and 1.
22:17 - When you watch a documentary, you know what happens.
22:19 - Yeah, yeah, exactly.
22:20 - Like everybody might know exactly what happens.
22:21 - So I'm like, why am I keeping it a secret?
22:23 It's gonna come out in November,
22:25 we still have five games left, we're good.
22:28 - It's playoffs, right?
22:30 - Say what?
22:31 - You missed a fucking--
22:31 - I was sick to my stomach to miss that game.
22:33 - Ked Jack, we played lights out.
22:35 - I saw like 40 shots of clay.
22:37 - I think we shot 36%, that's lights out for us.
22:41 - Let me tell you, you wanna talk about efficient?
22:43 - By the way, Klemmer said he would slick his hair back
22:44 if we shot up a 30%, do you remember that?
22:46 - Oh.
22:47 - Pat Riley.
22:48 - He made two threes in a row, swish.
22:50 - Christ.
22:50 - Swish.
22:51 - I heard John Rich called that.
22:52 - Two threes?
22:53 - John Rich is--
22:54 - Ticked a ball.
22:55 - I'm never a shriek of never shooting the ball.
22:56 - Yeah, and I like that.
22:58 - Marty, he fucking comes at me and he says,
23:02 you're not putting the stat sheet out,
23:03 you had a bad game.
23:04 I'm Kyle Anderson, do you know Kyle Anderson?
23:07 - I know Kyle Anderson.
23:08 - From the Memphis Grizzlies.
23:08 I am him, I'm never gonna score 30 points,
23:11 I'm always gonna have like seven, eight, and five,
23:15 or something like that.
23:16 Last time I was four, five, and two, not good.
23:18 - Shooting the ball three times
23:20 and having 10 points is efficient?
23:23 - Yeah, I would also say 25 free throws
23:25 for a Mensley game is absolutely insane.
23:27 - We had 25?
23:29 - Dude, they just knew that each of the clock--
23:30 - What was our free throw percentage?
23:31 - Can I shout out the people Zogsport,
23:33 shout out to them so much.
23:35 The refs though, I love them, but can we just play?
23:40 - Can I say something?
23:41 - We just play?
23:42 - You are doing it all, I have this ref in my pocket.
23:45 - He loves you.
23:46 - I love him, he's the man.
23:47 - It's the same ref every game, by the way.
23:48 - But I don't wanna get a whistle every 30 seconds.
23:51 - And he calls fouls for me all the time.
23:54 - He calls three, he called three seconds.
23:56 - I had three turnovers all off of three seconds calls.
24:00 - I think there was more than that.
24:01 - I watched the tape back, I wasn't in the fucking paint
24:04 for more than one and a half seconds every time.
24:07 - I love that, I like that he calls three seconds.
24:08 - I think he just doesn't like me.
24:09 - No, even like college and NBA doesn't call.
24:12 - I'll ask you this, if you were a ref,
24:15 if you were a ref at any level,
24:18 you couldn't have any type of like,
24:21 you would let--
24:22 - I'd be biased.
24:23 - Objectivity, is that the word?
24:25 - Yeah, you're right, you're right, you got it.
24:26 - If you saw a kid that you didn't like,
24:29 you'd call a shitload of fouls on him, wouldn't you?
24:30 - Oh my God, yeah.
24:32 - Yeah.
24:32 - So how do we expect refs at any level
24:36 to have any objectivity?
24:38 - I think in the pro level it's gonna get cracked.
24:40 - You don't need to keep saying it.
24:41 - Right.
24:42 - You learned one word, you can say it nine more times.
24:44 - Is it objectivity or subjectivity?
24:47 - Oh, objectivity is like unbiased, subjectivity is biased.
24:50 Even at the college level,
24:52 I see a guy that's pissing me off, he's fucking,
24:55 I would call, I would make bad calls.
24:57 - You get tracked and fired for that,
24:58 but in the men's league space,
24:59 like you could just do it all day long,
25:00 no one's gonna call, no one's gonna fire you.
25:02 - He's our ref every game, we have to treat him well.
25:05 - Anyways, it's gonna be a good documentary,
25:08 it's a Dana Doc situation.
25:10 Kendrick, listen man.
25:13 - Missed one game, I edited the fucking bracket,
25:17 what do you want from me?
25:18 - I had to edit a lot of things last night,
25:20 I was at the game.
25:21 - Oh, is there turmoil?
25:23 - I was at the game, full pod, and you had to edit it after.
25:25 And no disrespect, Control and Boys,
25:28 you guys know, I know you're listening to Snaker,
25:30 we had a lot of problems getting that footage right,
25:32 and that's not necessarily your fault,
25:33 that is part Chicago, part Gooch, part everybody,
25:37 took a long time getting that footage.
25:38 - I just wanna say, I'm not the GM by any means,
25:42 but no roster spot is safe.
25:44 Anybody.
25:46 - Yeah, but you could end it--
25:46 - That's the word on the street.
25:47 - Someone get cut?
25:48 - You could end it after the first sentence,
25:49 which is, I'm not the GM.
25:52 - That's the word on the street, I don't know who the GM is.
25:54 - It's technically Clemmer.
25:55 - No, Dana's the GM, I would say,
25:57 I'd say Clemmer's the coach, I'm the captain.
25:59 - Yeah.
26:00 (laughing)
26:02 - I am the captain, I kind of am.
26:03 I say things in the huddle, you don't.
26:06 - I'm just getting the finger from the crew.
26:08 You know it's true, it's not your fault,
26:09 but you know it's true.
26:10 - But yeah, it's gonna be very funny,
26:12 we take it, we're not joking either.
26:15 - The boys had beers after the game.
26:17 - Dana, Clemmer is taking it really serious,
26:20 like he'll bench you if you foul 90 feet away from the basket.
26:23 - Clemmer's screaming in the gym,
26:24 and he's not playing a character.
26:26 - He's not playing a character,
26:27 like he came in this morning like,
26:29 I woke up smiling from last night's win.
26:31 - You know how bad that was?
26:31 - Oh yeah, yeah.
26:32 - If I was on the other team,
26:34 and I saw some guy dressed in a suit coaching,
26:36 and men running around--
26:37 - Running around so much.
26:38 - At the ref.
26:39 - I would slap him in the face.
26:40 - It's a great psychological effect for us
26:41 versus the other team, 'cause I'd be so pissed
26:43 I wouldn't be able to face Drake.
26:44 - Shout out to Vibs, he's the press,
26:48 he is our--
26:48 - Our sideline correspondent.
26:50 - Which is very funny, it's the whole works.
26:52 And I also think, it's a pretty small gym,
26:55 I'm gonna leak the address for the playoffs,
26:58 and we're gonna have a home game.
27:00 - We gotta make the playoffs, we're 2-0 in the--
27:03 - If we lost every game, we'd probably still get close.
27:06 - Yeah, most of the other teams have to know who we are.
27:08 - We went 2-5 and won, yeah, we won more, I think we did.
27:11 - Yeah, we get a home game, there's nowhere to stand,
27:13 but it'd be hilarious if we could get a sea of people.
27:16 - Zero space.
27:17 - It'd be awesome, we'd need like 14 people
27:19 to show up, we have a home game.
27:20 - Yeah, and I know Nick Mulcahy's watching this
27:23 every second, waiting for his shout out.
27:25 - He's a beast, Nick Mulcahy's a beast.
27:27 - I didn't play great yesterday.
27:29 - He played great!
27:30 - I didn't play great.
27:31 - He iced free throws last game, two games ago, I guess,
27:34 to win the game.
27:35 - No, Nick's our best player.
27:36 - 14-5, five of seven shooting, come on, Nicky.
27:41 - Billy offensive boards, love it.
27:43 - Yeah, we gotta hopefully--
27:45 - That's Billy at his best.
27:45 - We need Billy's head to not blow up,
27:47 'cause he starts spewing at me.
27:50 Next is Frank the Tank lookalike.
27:53 - With the keys and everything.
27:54 - My honest thing was when I saw Clem say something
27:59 like a time trap or whatever it was,
28:02 I was like, I don't get it, that's Frank.
28:04 I had no idea that wasn't Frank.
28:06 Is Frank here?
28:07 - Kinda looks like Frank combined with Trapp.
28:10 - I can't, every time I look at it I laugh.
28:14 - He's doing the draft.
28:15 Frank is like, that's Frank.
28:17 The arm.
28:18 - The keys.
28:20 - The keys, the belly is exact--
28:22 - The belly coming out.
28:23 - The belly's like proportionally.
28:25 - What shirt is that?
28:25 Is that a Mets shirt?
28:26 - It looks like a Mets shirt, yeah.
28:27 - Mets shirt.
28:29 - Oh, whatever, it's Mets colors.
28:31 - He has to know who Frank is.
28:32 - Can I be honest?
28:33 This is not a disrespect,
28:34 but does that look like Chaps a little bit?
28:36 - That's right, I said it looks like them combined.
28:38 - It's Chaps' face on Frank's spot.
28:40 - It's unbelievable.
28:41 I never thought I'd see a lookalike of Frank a lot.
28:43 - Chaps is like slow key top three guy
28:46 who gets lookalikes at this company.
28:47 - Trent.
28:48 - Trent's number one.
28:49 - He's number one.
28:50 - I think Trent actually might be one.
28:52 - Robbie Fox gets a lot, yeah.
28:54 - Hey Trent, you think you're number one lookalike guy?
28:59 - Yeah, Hammer Fights.
29:02 - Yeah, I think Trent, I go Trent and then--
29:04 - Frank Sneaky has a lot of lookalikes.
29:06 Do you remember the Phillies fan
29:07 that looked a lot like Frank?
29:09 This is a couple years ago, but that guy was crazy.
29:11 - When I first started, like six years ago,
29:13 I was on a boat.
29:15 - You got mistaken for Frank?
29:16 - No, I was on a boat.
29:18 I was way skinny back then.
29:19 I was on a boat and there was a guy
29:21 that looked exactly like Trent.
29:23 I took a picture of him.
29:24 I posted it and I deleted it within like 30 seconds
29:28 'cause I was like, I'm so new here,
29:29 I'm afraid to tweet at people.
29:30 - See, there's the guy.
29:31 - Oh, that's Tank too.
29:33 - That's Frank the Tank.
29:34 - That's amazing as well.
29:35 - That is 100%.
29:35 - That's how he takes photos too.
29:37 - Exactly.
29:38 - That's amazing.
29:39 - Dude, it's crazy and that's the guy.
29:40 You look at Frank and he's like one of the most
29:42 unique looking human beings on earth,
29:44 but he's kind of not.
29:45 There's a lot of lookalikes.
29:46 - Do you guys have a lookalike?
29:47 I have one that I get all the time.
29:49 - I get--
29:50 - Who is it?
29:51 - I used to look like Ashton Kutcher, not anymore.
29:53 I'm fat and gross now.
29:54 Where you go?
29:55 - When did you ever look like Ashton Kutcher?
29:56 - You say that you look like Ashton Kutcher.
29:59 You call Ashton Kutcher--
30:00 - Now I get Josh Allen and Jon Rahm.
30:04 - Jon Rahm.
30:05 - I gotta get Jon Rahm all the time.
30:07 - Jon Rahm makes sense.
30:08 - Okay, Jon Rahm makes sense.
30:10 - Josh Allen.
30:11 - Ashton Kutcher.
30:11 - Sometimes I'll get Josh Allen.
30:13 Ashton Kutcher was, those days are behind me.
30:15 - This is Josh Allen.
30:17 - When I'm looking good, my beard's lined up,
30:19 I'm skinny faced.
30:21 - Let's not forget he said Ashton.
30:22 - Were you laughing at that?
30:23 - Ashton Kutcher makes no fucking sense.
30:25 - Ashton Kutcher.
30:26 - I don't care if you're skinny or not,
30:27 you look nothing like Ashton.
30:28 - I used to when I was 15.
30:31 - Did you just have long hair?
30:32 That was it?
30:33 - Yeah, pretty much.
30:33 - Yeah, so it's not Ashton Kutcher.
30:34 - I just had hair that was maybe kind of like his.
30:36 - Do you have any?
30:37 - Nah, not really.
30:38 - Type in Vincent Trocek.
30:41 This is the guy that every person--
30:43 - Oh, you're the hockey player?
30:44 - Yeah, the Rangers.
30:45 - That's him, right?
30:46 - It's kind of just me.
30:49 - Except he's got great hair.
30:50 - With a helmet on.
30:51 - Great hair.
30:52 - Yeah.
30:53 - Oh, the hair's throwing me off.
30:54 - Great hair.
30:55 - Give a helmet picture.
30:57 - You just gotta start rocking a helmet.
30:59 - If you just wore a helmet every day.
31:00 - Yeah, wore a helmet, I'm just him.
31:02 And he, we--
31:03 - We're just used to that.
31:04 - If you wear a helmet, you'll never have a problem again.
31:08 - Tank!
31:09 - Ready for comment.
31:09 - Tank, what's your comment on people
31:11 trying to look like you?
31:13 Do you think he looks like you?
31:16 - He does look like me.
31:17 - Okay.
31:18 - I mean, maybe it's a distant cousin or something like that.
31:22 I mean, I mean.
31:24 - The same.
31:25 - The exact same.
31:27 - I mean, what's crazy is--
31:29 - The keys.
31:30 - The keys are crazy.
31:30 - The keys are crazy.
31:32 - And Frank, the way you put your arm,
31:33 like when you're ready to go.
31:35 - Do it right now.
31:36 - Do it right now.
31:36 - Yeah.
31:38 - Wait.
31:39 - We have to do the POV for the--
31:43 - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
31:44 - Back a little.
31:44 - Turn profile, yeah.
31:47 Take the keys out.
31:48 Take the keys out of the pocket.
31:50 - Yep, I love it.
31:53 - There's so many keys on your fucking thing, Frank.
31:55 What does he do?
31:56 - He's got the Pathmark cards and stuff.
31:58 Yeah, I used to use those all the time, yeah.
31:59 I also have key fobs and a variety of key chains.
32:03 I got the 2013 All-Star game.
32:06 I got a couple of bottle openers.
32:09 - Why do you need more than, oh, is it just for the,
32:11 just keepsake?
32:11 - A couple of sodas.
32:13 - Well, this is the, this is actually a state of New Jersey
32:15 that--
32:16 - Oh, nice.
32:18 - That's sharp.
32:19 - General Mills.
32:20 - That's sharp.
32:20 - Yeah, wait, I mean, look at the,
32:21 you've seen the Phillies one, right?
32:23 The Phillies, Frank the Tank?
32:24 - Yeah.
32:25 - From last year?
32:26 - Well, did you ever look up that guy
32:27 while he disappeared?
32:29 - What?
32:30 - That guy?
32:31 - No.
32:32 - Did he do something bad?
32:32 - We went to Milkshake Dock,
32:33 fucking Philly Frank the Tank?
32:35 - Yeah, we were supposed to bring him in,
32:36 and then he got doxxed as like,
32:39 being like a former police officer
32:41 that got involved in some like,
32:42 - Not good.
32:43 - Not good deals.
32:44 - We need to bring the other Frank the Tank in,
32:47 the Chaps Frank.
32:47 - Yeah, the Chaps Frank.
32:48 - We found him.
32:49 Has anyone found him?
32:50 Like his social media or anything?
32:51 He probably doesn't have any.
32:52 - I mean, again, that's another,
32:53 pretty unique looking individual.
32:54 - I bet you he had two tanks.
32:56 - Dude, that guy walked in, like a Frank just,
32:58 - A battle of the person.
32:58 - Like, you guys just switch for the day,
32:59 it would be so funny.
33:00 - Yeah.
33:01 - He just starts doing all your shit,
33:03 like going on rants about.
33:04 - You had like an understudy.
33:05 Yeah, like at a party.
33:06 - I had a nice rant,
33:07 because my Uber driver was like,
33:09 like literally circling the block for like 20 minutes.
33:14 - What a piece of shit.
33:14 - Not the worst.
33:15 - It's not like you're running up a meter if you're Uber.
33:18 There's no, I don't even understand the reasoning.
33:19 - Yeah, but the food gets cold if it's Uber Eats.
33:21 - Oh, Uber Eats.
33:22 Okay, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha.
33:24 Yeah, that makes more sense.
33:25 - Greg, what's the last positive thing
33:27 that's happened in your day, to you?
33:30 Everything's positive, like,
33:31 I think your life is very positive,
33:33 but in your eyes, what's the last thing you're like,
33:36 wow, this was good?
33:37 - Working here, I guess.
33:39 - Besides that.
33:40 - Great answer.
33:41 - 'Cause that was like, I know,
33:42 that's what I was gonna say,
33:42 working here is always the best.
33:44 Devils, maybe?
33:45 Jack Hughes?
33:46 - Well, I haven't checked, he's on a team right now,
33:48 but got a couple of players not pulling their weight,
33:51 defense isn't any good.
33:52 - You are rational about the Devils, I'll give you that.
33:55 - Yeah.
33:56 - It's just, they're driving me nuts right now,
33:57 but they're too good a team not to be good.
34:00 - Did the Nets win last night?
34:01 - The Nets lost.
34:02 - I'm not a Nets fan anymore, I'm a Knicks fan.
34:04 - Well, yeah, yeah, right there.
34:06 (laughing)
34:07 - You're officially off the Nets wagon.
34:09 - Yeah, I'm tired of that organization,
34:11 that organization is terrible.
34:12 - All right.
34:13 - You need to meet up with this guy at a Knicks game.
34:15 - We need them both.
34:15 - Is he getting a ball autographed,
34:17 as like, for the Knicks or something?
34:18 Is that what he's holding?
34:19 - Yeah, I think so.
34:20 - Is that what this is for?
34:21 - Yeah.
34:22 Oh, it's a Knicks shirt.
34:23 - Yeah.
34:24 - Hey, they're both fans.
34:25 - I think he's getting a ball signed,
34:26 by like, someone with lines or something.
34:27 - And he's got the, uh...
34:28 - He has the same beard as you, too,
34:30 just his is longer.
34:31 - I can't grow my beard that way.
34:33 - Have you ever tried?
34:34 - Uh, no.
34:35 (laughing)
34:37 - Yeah, it's Chaps's face.
34:38 - He's just older than you.
34:40 - Yeah, he's got the full white.
34:42 - Yeah.
34:43 - Fucking, we gotta DM this guy and figure out where the--
34:44 - I know, I need him.
34:45 I want Frank right there and him right here.
34:48 - Yeah.
34:49 - You need to collect this man.
34:50 - Yeah.
34:51 - I gotta go to the dog walk.
34:52 - All right, that's the rundown.
34:54 Thank you, Frank.
34:55 - Thank you, Frank.
34:56 Thank you, everyone.
34:57 (whooshing)
34:59 [BLANK_AUDIO]