Have you ever fallen victim to a narcissist? Narcissists are smart, manipulative and will not give up on achieving what they want to. Outsmarting a Narcissist is considered to be science; you can’t use rational logic because unfortunately, the narcissistic brain is pathological. Narcissist's brains don’t work the same as our brains. We have to understand what makes the narcissist tick; what they are looking for in interactions with us and how their brain works.
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00:00 Hey Psych2Goers, thanks so much for your support. If you're new to this channel and by the end of
00:04 the video you enjoy our content, do consider subscribing and joining the Psych2Go fam.
00:08 Now, let's begin. Have you been in a relationship with a narcissist? If so, you might understand how
00:14 they can be smart, manipulative, and how they won't give up on getting what they want. Because
00:19 of their manipulative tendencies and tactics, you might find yourself stuck, helpless, or
00:25 emotionally drained from your relationship with them. You might even feel like there's no way to
00:30 stop their power over you. So, to help empower you, here are 11 smart ways to outsmart a narcissist.
00:37 Number one, heal yourself. Have you noticed that you always go back to your relationship
00:48 with a narcissist when you feel at your lowest point? Oftentimes, narcissists will exploit your
00:53 vulnerability and insecurities when you're feeling at your worst. So, a way to outsmart them and to
00:59 not let them come back into your life again is by focusing on healing yourself and getting back
01:04 control over your own life. Number two, mirror their behavior. Narcissists thrive on getting
01:11 a reaction from you. They might do things to purposely hurt you and to get you to respond
01:17 in a very emotional manner. In cases like these, you can try mirroring their actions. By doing this,
01:23 you reflect their anger back onto them where it belongs. Number three, cut off contact. It can be
01:30 hard to cut off all contact with someone that you've been in a relationship with. However, if
01:35 you keep in touch with them after ending things, you may only be giving them and their toxic
01:40 behavior the opportunity to slide back into your life. Number four, use the gray rock method. If
01:47 you find it impossible to cut off all contact with them, you could try the gray rock method.
01:53 This is when you take a step back and avoid reacting to any of the communication they send
01:58 you. Instead, you can ask someone to read the emails, letters, or text messages for you. This
02:04 way, it can give you a little distance and clarity to understand the reality of the situation.
02:09 Number five, agree with them. This may sound contradictory, but narcissists tend to take
02:16 pleasure in shaming people. For example, a narcissist parent may shame you for how strict
02:21 or lenient you are with your own children. If they say this, agree with them. By doing this,
02:27 you're taking the wind out of their sails. Because they're so used to getting a response,
02:32 they may end up not knowing how to respond at all. This is the power of non-resistance. As you mirror
02:37 their words back to them and show their behavior for how it really is, there's very little that
02:42 they can do about it. Number six, keep your cards close to your chest. As mentioned before,
02:48 narcissists like to exploit your vulnerabilities and insecurities. So, it's important you don't
02:53 try to explain your reasons or rationalize with them when they're trying to attack you. The more
02:58 you try to explain yourself, the weaker your position becomes. Number seven, challenge your
03:04 own thoughts and situation. As surprising as it may seem, narcissists are actually very fragile
03:10 and insecure. This is why they often use other people to make themselves feel better, whether
03:15 it's by shifting the blame or projecting their weaknesses or insecurities onto you. They'll try
03:20 to make it seem like you are the one with problems in the relationship. So, try to challenge yourself
03:25 and ask yourself whether what they say is true. By doing this, you can see your situation with
03:30 more clarity and understanding. Number eight, you need to remain very calm. Since narcissists like
03:38 to manipulate and find ways to cause you emotional distress, it can feel really difficult to remain
03:42 calm in the relationship. Whether it's accusing you for being angry or being upset at you for
03:47 something you didn't do, they will try to get an emotional response from you. Because of this,
03:52 it's important for you to remain calm. By responding in a calm or unemotional manner,
03:57 you undermine their attempt of hurting you. Number nine, find ways to disengage. Do you give them a
04:04 lot of your attention? Something a narcissist will often do is use the victim card to gain
04:09 sympathy from you. The more attention you give them, the more they thrive. Any attention is
04:14 better than none at all to a narcissist. So, a way to outsmart them is to find ways to disengage
04:19 from their fairy tales and focus on something else. Number 10, refuse to play. Narcissists
04:26 lack empathy and rarely form emotional attachments with others. So, if you find yourself in a
04:31 relationship with one, you may find that they don't really care for your well-being at all.
04:36 Instead, they might take pleasure in causing you distress. If seen as a game of chess,
04:42 narcissists are the type who will take every measure to beat you in the game. So, the only
04:47 way for you to change the outcome is for you to take yourself out of the game and remove any power
04:52 they have over you. And number 11, listen to your body. Do you get triggered easily? Narcissists
05:00 like to say or do things that emotionally and mentally hurt you. The trauma that can come from
05:05 the verbal or emotional abuse often leaves a mark and may manifest in a number of ways,
05:09 including feeling anxious, stressed, or triggered by certain words, scenes, or people. So, when you
05:16 listen to your body and use techniques such as meditation, deep breathing, and visualization,
05:22 you reduce your stress and help yourself become more level-minded again. This, in turn, will make
05:27 it harder for them to manipulate you again. If you or somebody you know have experienced
05:32 narcissistic abuse, then please reach out and speak to somebody you trust.
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