Dave & Chuck the Freak talk about one of the craziest stories they've ever covered on the show. A man on vacation in Cambodia was allegedly performed on by a macaque after leaving his window open and they find the confirmation video to verify the story is real.
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00:00Here's the craziest story of the day.
00:09Okay.
00:10A dude woke up to a monkey blowing him.
00:19Perfect.
00:20Well-trained monkey.
00:24You guys, I thought there's no way this story is real.
00:28I would have thought that.
00:29They have made it up.
00:30The monkey would have removed his head.
00:34You'd think.
00:35Appendage.
00:36This guy found out the hard way why you should always close your windows before passing out in Cambodia.
00:44Wait a second.
00:45This just wasn't his monkey?
00:47This was not his monkey.
00:49This is a random gay monkey that snuck into his room and performed upon him when he passed out.
00:56You don't see that one happening.
00:59And there is footage and proof.
01:04I swear to the heavens above.
01:07It is a absolutely insane story.
01:12Not only that.
01:13You want to know what type of monkey it was?
01:16Oh.
01:17Macaque.
01:17Yes.
01:19So he had a...
01:21Macaque.
01:21On...
01:22Macaque.
01:23Yes.
01:23Yeah.
01:24Yeah.
01:25Dave, you are super excited.
01:26He is.
01:26This is a crazy story, Lee.
01:28He is.
01:28He's his mind is bull.
01:29I can't even wrap my hat around it.
01:30I thought it was BS.
01:30He forgot the story somewhere.
01:32It's so exciting.
01:33He was really excited about the macaque part.
01:35Yeah.
01:36That's really how it was.
01:37I just wanted to throw that in there.
01:38He had the macaque thing set up.
01:39So here's what happened.
01:40Moments after this guy passed out, his friends arrived, they discovered the monkey violating
01:46him in one of the most horrifying ways imaginable.
01:49No.
01:51I can't let you hear this guy.
01:53This is a guy leaving like a message on, I don't know if it's WhatsApp or something, to
01:58his buddies about how this all played out, but he swears in it.
02:01So it's up at DaveAndChuckTheFreak.com.
02:04But he says this, two of my mates were in Cambodia.
02:07They were staying in a room, left the window open in the night.
02:10When they went into his room, he was passed out.
02:13Yep.
02:14The monkey was performing oral sex on him.
02:18My God.
02:19They got a picture of it.
02:21They didn't want to scare the monkey in case it bit his macaque.
02:25Yep.
02:25So they all went outside and made monkey noises through the window to try and scare it or
02:31get it outside.
02:33Hmm.
02:34What would you do if a monkey was blowing your buddy?
02:38I guess.
02:39I don't.
02:41My God, I don't know.
02:42You should be scared because you don't know what that monkey will do.
02:45I'm assuming that it would kill.
02:47So I think they did the right thing.
02:48Move over, monkey.
02:49Let me show you how it's done.
02:51Wow.
02:51I think they did the right thing.
02:53I do too.
02:54Right?
02:55Yep.
02:55Because they didn't scare, startle the monkey.
02:59Because it could have been macaque terror.
03:03I'll just say someone taught that monkey.
03:08Right?
03:08Monkeys don't just.
03:09They say these monkeys in Cambodia are very sexual.
03:12With each other, though.
03:13I mean, you don't think that they would go on in.
03:17Are you ready to see?
03:17Yeah.
03:18I mean, what the hell?
03:19What the hell?
03:21Who found the story, Jason?
03:22Yeah.
03:23Yeah, of course.
03:24Hey!
03:25Of course.
03:27What did you think?
03:28What makes you think that?
03:30Come on, me!
03:30Come on, me!
03:31Lisa!
03:32I would never.
03:33And I would never spend countless hours finding an unedited video.
03:37And he also found the unedited video.
03:39I figured he did.
03:39I would never do that.
03:42Nice work, Jason.
03:43So watch this, and you'll see it appear here.
03:46This is up at DaveAndChuckTheFreak.com if you're sick and want to see this.
03:51There.
03:53Oh, man.
03:54Holy cow.
03:56It's really on him.
03:58It's really got him good.
04:00This is insane, you guys.
04:01You'd feel so violated.
04:03I'd wonder what kind of deadly monkey disease I got.
04:06Do I, you know, what's going to happen?
04:07If a guy will ever be the same.
04:09Is that it?
04:10Is that happening next?
04:11I mean, I think this might be how some stuff starts.
04:14I don't know how the Cambodia healthcare system is, but I'd be in some trouble.
04:19Don't go.
04:19So this guy's got the new COVID.
04:21Yeah, exactly.
04:22Oh, my God.
04:24When?
04:24Is this in the video that you sent me to post, Dave?
04:27Yeah.
04:28I better take this off the website and just put a link.
04:30I didn't realize there was exposure to tell you.
04:32I thought you would have checked that out there.
04:34Yeah, better get that off.
04:35We always put stuff up and put not safe for work.
04:37I have all those warnings, but this is not going to stop my boss, another boss, from coming
04:42in and kicking the door down and asking why we have a monkey blowing a dude on the website.
04:45Yeah, you might want to take that down.
04:47Hey, put this, there's a little, it's a crazy monkey video.
04:51Just put it up.
04:53Just go ahead and put it up.
04:55We got to go to the website.
04:56Yeah, because you really see.
04:58Yeah, you do.
04:59It's crazy.
05:00I'll be honest.
05:01I mean, the guy's out cold.
05:02You would have thought everything would have been just flaccid.
05:06When he finally woke up when they were trying to get the monkey outside, he left the hotel
05:12room immediately, got the next flight home, and no one could get a hold of him.
05:18No, because I would have climbed a tall tower.
05:21Yeah, he's gone.
05:21Got the next flight home.
05:22Where did he live?
05:23You see what's happened.
05:23He's from the UK.
05:24My friends have decided to share it with the world.
05:32So he went on vacation?
05:34Yeah, they were in Cambodia on vacation.
05:35Yeah.
05:36Cambodia.
05:37It's probably the second most gross thing he had on his dong or that whole trip.
05:42Be my guess.
05:43Hopefully they can identify who he is so the ladies don't have sex with that guy.
05:47Yeah.
05:48Oh, right.
05:49Macaac.
05:49You don't want that?
05:50No, they definitely blocked his face so you can't tell who he is.
05:54That's the only thing.
05:55But his friends sold him right down the river in a group chat.
05:59Oh.
06:00And it's gone viral.
06:01They're all showing everybody.
06:02How do you recover from that?
06:03I don't know.
06:04Like, what kind of therapy do I need after I've had a macaque perform on me?
06:09You can't hang around anyone that you used to.
06:12Like a whole new friend group.
06:14You have to move.
06:15Like countries, cities?
06:17It's like being involved in a mobster trial.
06:22Yeah, you've got to get out of there.
06:23Whole new life.
06:24You can't be this guy in this photo.
06:27You might be living with the macaques now in Cambodia.
06:30Yeah, exactly.
06:30He's a lope.
06:31Some crossed wires.
06:32Hey, and I hate to tell you, like, what happens if something gets crossed up?
06:37No, Chuck, no.
06:38What happens?
06:39No.
06:40And then all of a sudden you move to Cambodia.
06:42Because you're into.
06:43Spend his whole life trying to recreate that moment.
06:46Yep.
06:48That would be a real mind-eff.
06:49Honestly, we've covered some crazy stories on this show through the years.
06:53It's nothing like I thought.
06:54I have never heard of anything like this in my life, thankfully.
06:59Until today.
07:01It should have never happened.
07:03No.
07:04It should have never happened, guys.
07:07It did, though.
07:08Don't pass out in Cambodia.
07:11I won't.
07:11Close the windows.
07:12Close the windows.
07:13It's so hot, though, right?
07:15Don't go to Cambodia.
07:16I'm not going to.
07:16Okay, does stop it even there.
07:18And give the guy you haven't posted on the website a heads up that there's a monkey blown
07:21a dude in the picture.
07:22Yeah, yeah, yeah.
07:23And add bestiality to Dick Bloodhound's resume.
07:26Oh, wow.
07:27Yeah, he found it.
07:28He found it.
07:28Yeah, he's certified in bestiality.
07:30Good job.
07:30Yep.
07:31He's one of the best.
07:32When you say it like that, it'll strike it from the record.
07:36Take it over there.
07:38Yeah, that's probably good.
07:39Certified.
07:39Yeah, he's certified.
07:43That's a terrible title.
07:46Put it on my business card.
07:47Certified.
07:49Jason.
07:49Certified in bestiality.
07:51Bestiality expert.
07:51Yeah, you don't want that.
07:54We could stop saying it.
07:57Especially when you put my name on it.
07:58Dick Bloodhound's a little anonymous.
08:01You want people to say Jason's certified in bestiality on the radio?
08:04Dick Bloodhound's the pen name, you know?
08:06Yeah.
08:06Sure.
08:07Jason from David Jack the Freak, the bestiality expert?
08:09Oh, jeez.
08:10Yeah.
08:10Oh, jeez.
08:11Oh, jeez.
08:12Too far.
08:13Here's his business card.
08:16But I hope that guy is still with us.
08:21Oh, he's not.
08:22Yeah, he's dead.
08:23He's dead.
08:24I know I'd be dead.
08:25You think you'd?
08:25No.
08:26Oh, yeah.
08:27Yep.
08:27I'd have to explain it to everyone that I love.
08:31Hey, Chuck, how you doing, man?
08:32Just so you know, this will be the last time you talk to me.
08:35Forever?
08:35A monkey blew me, so.
08:36Oh, no.
08:38Yeah, you're going to see it.
08:39How long did that happen?
08:40My friend group is sharing it with the world.
08:44Oh, no, man, no.
08:45In our gay spider monkey group chat.
08:49You'll see my donger in a monkey's mouth.
08:51Oh, my God.
08:51So I'm going to kill myself today.
08:53I get it.
08:54See you, dude.
08:54It's been fun.
08:55It's been a blast.
08:56It's been a slice.
08:57It was fun right up until that Cambodia trip.
09:01Told you not to go.
09:02Went south.
09:02I know.
09:02So weird for you.
09:03You don't even like to travel.
09:04I shouldn't have went.
09:06So many people are asking for this.
09:08Oh, no.
09:09You can go check it out on our Twitter.
09:12Go to davidductorfreak.com.
09:13It's all right there.
09:14I thought you were taking it down.
09:15Well, the link.
09:16He's got the link there.
09:16I'm still linking to it.
09:18Yeah.
09:18Oh, well, that's what I'm saying.
09:20Yeah, no, but he was embedded it.
09:21I had the actual thing embedded to where the webpage would load.
09:25David took the freak basically media.
09:27All right.
09:28And then there's all of a sudden a voicemail of somebody giving like a recount.
09:32I just heard the person starting to recount the tale of this monkey BJ.
09:37I didn't watch or listen all the way through to realize that, oh, there's photos of this monkey with an actual man's penis in his mouth.
09:43So go check it out at davidductorfreak.com.
09:45It's there.
09:46It's there.
09:46You can still get the link to it there if you.
09:48It is there.
09:49We'll point you in all the right directions, but we can't put the actual video on the site.
09:53Right.
09:53Well, I mean, we can, but it just means someone's going to kick down my door and I'm going to get near full.
09:56But the most insane story you'll hear today.